¶ Introduction to Encouragement
Welcome to Let it Be Easy with Susie Moore . Are you an encourager ? Do you encourage other people ? Oh my , the world needs more encouragers . I had a thought the other day . I thought does the word encourage and the word courage like there has to be an alignment here ?
I mean the word courage is in encourage and I did a little bit of research and yes , they do share the same root word , core , c-o-r , meaning heart . Isn't that beautiful To have courage means you use your heart To encourage others , means you share your heart and maybe even remind others of the heart that they have within them .
Whenever I think about what encouragement means to me it's not praise , it's not kind of cheap , happy , you're the best , you're amazing and look we see this a lot and look wonderful . Anything ,
¶ Courage and Encouragement Connection
any love you put into the world , it's always going to be . I mean , it's always a plus . Right , more love in the world is always a plus . But for me , encouragement is a little bit different , and this is inspired by Adlerian psychology , alfred Adler , the late psychologist . He spoke about encouragement specifically as a helpful tool for children and for adults .
So let me give you an example here , instead of giving a judgment like you're so hot , you're so cute , you're so smart . We want to tell people the impact that they've had on us , and this is an example I actually wrote about in the book Let it
¶ Adlerian Psychology on Encouragement
Be Easy . Imagine somebody comes to your house and she's an amazing organizer . There's a friend that you have and she's just naturally really good at putting things in a way that it just looks great easy to manage . I mean , I wish I were a bit more like this . My mother-in-law's like this , but really just the incredible natural organizer .
Say you needed a bit of help and your friend came over and organized your home or part of your home . It's very easy to go . You're the best , you're amazing , you're incredible , you're an organizational whiz . And those things might be true and if it feels right for you and in your integrity , say what feels good . But what about this ?
What about something like this ? Instead , try it on , see how it feels . Imagine it were you . You were the organizer and you came to my house and I'm like , wow , you're such a whiz , you're magic , thank you , cool .
One thing that would be praise , encouragement , would be hey , you know , I was feeling really overwhelmed before you came over and it felt as if someone was showing up for me today and that generosity of spirit that I could just feel . It really meant a lot to me and I feel so much more calm in my house now . Do you see ?
They're both positive , both uplifting , but one is about what it means to you . We're making it about you and the benefits you've experienced , or what your gratitude leans into , versus giving a judgment on a person .
¶ Impact Statements vs. Judgmental Praise
So , instead of labeling something as good or bad , a whiz or not a whiz , brilliant or not so brilliant , there is a sincerity and a depth and a thoughtfulness and a non-judgmental way to share encouragement .
Now , the reason I want to kind of drill down on what I mean by non-judgment is , even if something's a positive judgment like you're brilliant , it's still a judgment and sometimes when people praise us or say we're something we're like , gosh , I've still got to be that thing that you have placed upon me .
That's like a label that you have I'm brilliant , so I better always be brilliant . Versus explaining the impact I've had on you , making it about you and , yes , the situation and the generosity and the showing up , but what it meant for you . I would feel so encouraged , wouldn't you , if someone said , hey , this is the impact that you've had on me .
This is what it's meant to me , and it's not because you're XYZ , it's because , in your presence , this is what I have received . What , if all judgments are something that we can certainly have .
Look , we're human , it's how we think , but we're thoughtful and conscious and willing to maybe go a little deeper and encourage others by letting them know what they mean to us Courage , encouragement coming from the heart . Look like I said , there's nothing wrong with praise , but sometimes praise can feel a little cheap and you see it thrown around .
Right , you're amazing . You're amazing . I see it on Instagram nonstop . Everyone's so amazing and look great . Right , it's better than you suck . But I wonder if we took a moment , paused and really thought about what does this mean to me ? What can I share ? That really is something coming from my heart core encouragement , courage .
How can I show up in a way that is encouraging this person ? Because really isn't that what love is ? It's not something that we just splash around thoughtlessly , even over give . In certain ways , maybe we'll even say less , but we will do it with great
¶ Implementing Heartfelt Encouragement
intention . Encouragement over praise . How can you implement or test or play around with this this week Until tomorrow , my friends , so much love and ease Until tomorrow
¶ Episode Closing and Call to Action
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