Hello girls and gays, welcome to episode 8 of the lesbian supper club. Girls, gays actually, and heterosexual married women who hate their husbands. Welcome to the lesbian supper club. You're you're our favourite audience member, the. Heterosexual middle-aged women who hate their husbands are by far my favourite. They're by far the most wild, actually, yeah. Jesus Christ. Friday night we went to Coyote Bar in Camden. Fuck me, Jesus. In all the wrong ways. Yeah. That was not a fucking
experience, wasn't it? Do you know what it has the potential to be? So fucking? Good if it was a gay bar. If it was a gay bar or if they just had like a it just needs to be a better calibre of people. I don't necessarily think that it needs to be entirely gay, but I do think that I think a lot of men do you. Know what they do need to not let in big groups of men. That's the problem. Like no more than three guys in a group. I think if there's more than two
men, just fuck off, yeah. So basically anyway, the context, Freya Cafes, libraries, swimming pools, anywhere. Especially swimming pools. Yeah. So to add a bit of context, Freya had been going on about wanting to go to this karate ugly bar for months. Can I also just say that I was like obsessed with the film Karate Ugly? Who was it? It's always been my dream to go to a Karate Ugly. Who was not obsessed with karate?
Ugly and Fred been going on about it for months and the time had never been right until last week. So we head there. About 9:30 it's in. Like a really weird area as. Well, that's in the Camden lock basically. So anyone who knows Camden that you know where all the markets are, it's it's in there and we walk in and it wasn't dead, but it wasn't busy, but it was fine and straight away like. I was howling straight away like I loved it straight away it. Was great, Yeah.
The crack was great. They were girls dancing, were brilliant. And the vibe was definitely just about there. Like, I think they could execute this whole bar better, but it could also have been a lot worse, right? Yeah. So we're having a really good time. We're with our friends, we're having fun, we're in and out, having a dance outside, you know, singing, dancing to the music. Everything's going well until actually, you know, let me wind this back a little bit.
Because when we first walked in, it was very obvious the type of guy that goes there, which is the type of guy that would say something along the lines of what was she wearing if they heard about sexual assault, right? You can just look around this bar and it's all the same type of like middle-aged or like very average looking guys who clearly struggle in their day-to-day to speak to women. So go to bars like this to where women are empowering themselves by dancing and being fucking free.
But in their minds, you know, they're like, well, if you're here dancing, you clearly want me. And also just. See it on their face, You. Know me, right? Exactly. So that kind of then translated through to not only the girls that were there performing the girls that any female that was just in the bar, there was this all like air of like, oh, you're here because you want. It it GED them up, didn't they
really? They got themselves all excited because they saw these women dancing on a bar and they. Clearly don't see women in shorts. Very often. To be fair, you didn't look like you've seen a woman in shorts. In your Yeah, but I was smiling like a Cheshire cat. No, I know. At the back of the room, I wasn't fucking hurting anyone. These guys at the bath trying to fucking touch these girls legs, asking girls if they can touch their hair, like being fucking
weird. So there was an air of like pervert just fucking lingering in the worst in the worst way, which we kind of expected. But then obviously what had happened as the night had gone on is that these guys got more drunk. So then their kind of inhibitions started to come out more and more more. Of them came as well like more. Men, Yeah, more men showed up.
So there was a point in the night where me and Freya were just in the bar innocently and started kissing and straight away this guy fucking approaches us. And do you know what fucks me off more than anything? They pull us apart. They have the actual audacity when we're like hugging or kissing to come and grab each one of us on the shoulder and pull us apart like it's their divine right and be like basically try and thank us. For giving them I feel like there should be fucking weird.
I think there should be a law that lets you punch men around the face if they do that, yeah, like you should get off Scott free because like I do a lot more than catch in the face. I like to play with those like rings that has like something sharp on them that we showed them in the crotch. But I feel like this is a problem right with with a lot of women is that people talk more about how people get in trouble
for self defence. IE if they're carrying around pepper spray in the UK, it's actually like illegal I'm pretty sure to do that, which is ridiculous, right? So so they, they speak more about how you know you get in trouble if you defend yourself, but what about if you, what about the fucking people who attack you? Why don't they ever just say, guys, can you fucking stop harassing women 24/7? But yeah, they do.
They do, definitely. I don't know how they're going to really sort that out with that bar because it is really tricky when it's just go back shit. No, I knew they would. Go back unless there unless because there was like what five of us? So as this guy started to pull us apart, our big daddy friend shout out to Leanna who was straight in there Big daddy king in his face like get the fuck away. Who do you think you are? Which then jeed me up.
I'm like, yeah, I've got my daddy Leanne in it. Scarlett Will. Literally spot Leanna in an argument and she will storm over to Leanna so fucking grievously shoved a rocket up her ass just to make sure that she's barking there to her. Yes, there's nothing Chihuahua about me until Leanna's. There, but I will say it's not. There I am the Malanoy. If Leanna's there. Leanna, I will admit, is the Malanoy and I'm then the Chihuahua. Not my you are.
I'm not going to answer that. Actually, do you not see me with that bouncer? You were quite good with the bouncer, but he would have fucking wiped the. Floor with you? Oh, I would have. Wiped off any of us cut fish. So yeah, then. But I our friendly and I pulled him apart. He then kept laughing in our face because they're just so entitled. They don't even think like when we're getting angry. They don't even think it's
problematic. And then in all fairness, we did call over security and security did sort it well. I I mean, well, when I went upstairs to the toilet, this guy was like, hello. And I was like, hi. And he was like, you're having fun, fun with your friends downstairs. I just looked to him and I said, what the fuck is it to you by? Like I was like, what the fuck? He was literally waiting at the top of the stairs by the toilets just to be able to say that. Like how fucking pathetic.
Yeah, I wouldn't go back. I would not go back. And it didn't feel safe. It did not feel. Safe, like no. And it was very predatory. So I wouldn't, I, I genuinely wouldn't recommend it. And you know, again, just quickly on that, like a lot of you guys have been in the DM saying like, where do you go in London? Where do you go in London? For obvious reasons, we're not going to say specifically where we go, but like I'm not going to recommend anywhere because I
don't feel Soho is safe anymore. We've had really bad. I'd actually recommend none of you go to Soho when you come to London. That is my mom recommendation. Go elsewhere. Go to I. Don't think there's a good gay scene in London? No, no there's not. East isn't bad, I've heard. I can't speak from experience. We don't go out. Yeah, but that's what I mean is that in East, I feel like you probably get a more positive lesbian experience for sure.
And also like. A lot of our friends do actually say they have a really good time in Dalston's Superstore, we've just never been, so I would probably recommend that. Dalton's first. I wouldn't recommend Soho. I now wouldn't recommend this bar in Camden. I wouldn't recommend Mayfair either, no. Because we go out in West London a lot, but we don't go to exclusively. We don't go to really any exclusively gay places. I mean it turns sadly, we have one of our friends who are all gay.
We make it a gay place because so many of us turn up, but it's not exclusively a gay place. And the sad thing is we always have better, more liberal response in West and where we go in West than we do in Soho or anywhere that you would think would be basically a gay scene. I think as well because like these misogynistic pricks or homophobes will go to the areas where they know gay people are going to be.
Yep, because they are well. Because they're so fucking deluded they still can't believe that lesbianism actually exists and that we 100% don't want a penis. Anywhere they were doing it a. 1000 feet of us. They think that we're literally performing it's. Fucking weird. Can I also just say as well, straight women, if you're listening to this, if you make out with your girlfriends for male attention.
We have said this before, but it's another public Yeah, it's another stop performing for men, please, because you're fucking ruining our lives. Yeah, you're ruining it for us. Moving on, we got some tattoos at the weekend which was a lot of fun. If you follow us on the Lesbian Supper Club pod you would have seen that. And to all of you that responded to our story of me saying what do you think Freya is getting with China? You're pathetic, immature. You need to grow up.
But I also love you because I would have exactly. Replied the same thing. That is exactly where my mom was going. If you guys haven't already seen it's Moral Antics Tattoo, it's by our friend Annabelle who is an insane artist and an amazing, incredible artist and we just
had the best time. When you have a really good experience when you're getting a tattoo, I feel like because it's almost like energetically it needs to be a good space because you're literally getting something on your skin for the rest of your life. Like you need someone who's got a very. Good. Well, her energy must be good because I've never really been like that. Like bought into getting a tattoo. Guys, I walk out with a fucking trance stamp that says unforgettable above my ass.
Fucking iconic. So if she's not bringing some kind of great voodoo energy, yeah, I don't know what sparked me to do that. I love, I love it. I'm actually still really happy about it. I'm thinking I don't know what was wrong with me. I'm thinking that tramp stamp in the summer, thong on low rise,
trousers hot. I'm going to get a bespoke made lesbian supper club thong bikini please, and just yeah, get a little tan on that fucking tattoo and just go to town on the beach with the camera rising. I'd love that it does, it does look really really hot. But I think everything also always looks so much better with the tan so I can't wait for that. Agreed. I got AI, got a car on my arm. Freya Dunn and Emma Chamberlain. It wasn't actually purposeful,
but she does have her tattoo. Fred, don't say. I've always loved it. I pretend like you don't literally idolise the ground. This girl, you're going to fuck me off. I actually have gone. And no, I'm not going to say it on here, but I really love her. It's not a bad thing for you to say. Yeah. No, no, it was based off of her. Yes, her tattoos are sick. I love her tattoos, but it wasn't purely because of that. But it was part of she definitely part inspired. I feel like she just own that.
You're obsessed with Emma Chamberlain. It's not a bad thing though. Right now, that's a bad thing. Just say that you love Emma Chamberlain. Why are you so against this love? Emma Chamberlain. I do OK. I'm not saying that I don't. So was the tattoo part inspired by Emma Chamberlain? Why are you being so? Fucking weird about this. You're making me feel weird. Oh Jesus, the chair's going and look OK, she loves her like I do love her, but I also don't want to be like bitch, just like I
like me saying she had one. It's a bit like I like. Me getting a dragon, a dragon dragon, like me getting a dragon on me and you saying, oh, is it because you're obsessed with Angelina Jolie? And I'd be like, fuck yes, it is. Like I would literally get. Every totally get it, I totally get it, but also no like that is I really like her car tattoo. I actually really like her car tattoo. So do you like Emma Chamberlain? God you are annoying me so much. Don't say the song.
I know what you're going to say. I know the song. Reason I got it was because I told Annabelle that I used to go camping with my family and she took the car from the camping story. Freya, you have an American fucking Cadillac on your arm. Cadillac. What is it then? I don't fucking. OK, OK, It's an American fucking car. You don't have your parents fucking old Volvo, Volvo, whatever. How I have your mother and dad. You don't. You have a fucking nineteen 2002
Mondeo on your arm. You've got an American car the same as what Emma Chamberlain has. You're a big fat Emma Chamberlain little pussy ass fan. Fucking own it. That was so good, now you're just trying to devalue my genada tattoo. I'm not every right you to neither tattoo. Everyone then shut the fuck up bitch. OK fine, I will shut the fuck up thank. You very much. I love your tattoo. I can't wait to spank your ass. Just look at it and thank yeah, I spank.
My ass for a long time after the last five minutes of your fucking behaviour. Nice. Tell you what isn't unforgettable? It's when you had the shits the other weeks. It was actually more vomiting I had. You did? I had the shits for like like 6 days. OK, well I tell you what is unforgettable. You farting on me every night until the point where it rumbles my whole fucking skin. I love Mark. You're a lucky bit. OK? Don't start with this.
Do not fucking start with this because I will go to town so fucking hard you'll run out here crying. OK, moving on. Oh fuck me, do you know what? There's so much I could say, but. She's on that note talking about us and all of our bickering today. We've set this up, and fantastically well, and I didn't even think that we would be bickering today over Freya's obsession with Emma Chamberlain, but here we are. Asshole. Yeah, Emma, please come on the podcast.
Oh, so now you love her, we can bump her, appealing to her to come onto the Lesbian Supper club. Podcast we can we can play bumper cars with our arms. I'm sure you'd love that. I would love that. Today we're going to be also talking about top three red flags in women. Oh God, yeah. I don't feel like, I feel like be top three. I was gonna say got like top ten. I think 3 isn't enough. 3 is not enough. Three or three, 3 is not enough. No, I think we can both
collectively agree. Number one would definitely be demonstrating. Clear signs of jealousy very early from day one. Yeah. I mean, like, possessive at the bar. Yeah. Like, why did you smile at the bartender? Do you know what I mean? That kind of vibe. But it's not so much that they have to talk about it. It's more like body language.
You start giving attention to somebody else and and then they they turn around and they're like feel uncomfortable or something or start to like make little like jokes about like being your girlfriend or something like that. That is crazy. Like straight off. One of my exes demonstrated one of these and it very, very early on and it was a red flag that I should have taken, which was basically, I had a friend in Canada who I'd been friends with
by this point for 2 1/2 years. Like, you know, pretty sure this person had a boyfriend. This girl had a boyfriend. And I was on like a second or third date with the girl that I was with. And she had stayed over and I'd got up in the morning to go for a shower and came back into the room with my little towel on, my little towel wrapped around my head. And I just had a fucking boot lobbed at me and I was like, what the fuck is going on here? And she was absolutely fucking tamping, right?
And I couldn't work out why for ages because she was having like a like a really theatrical moment about this. And I was. Like wow, how long had you been seeing her for? Oh, less than two weeks. Oh. It was, and you stayed with her. Oh yeah, I'm an idiot. That's on you. It was early and I was like what what is going on? I actually thought she had lobbed a boot in frustration of something else or it got some bad news and I just happened to walk in at the. Worst time be in the line of.
Fire. No, no, no, no. She was lobbing it at me and it was because the entitled person that she is when I was in the shower had gone on to my phone, gone on to the messages with this. The Canadian girl, which by the way, can I say we're all platonic, decided that I was cheating on her even though we weren't officially together, but I was allegedly cheating on her. Decided to go absolutely mental. And you say to me, oh, you're an idiot for staying. I did actually, in that moment,
turn around and go you. Know what? Just leave like this is really not. I'm not here for this, but the red flag done the classic thing of being like, I've never acted like that before, I'm sorry. I don't know where you come. From blah blah blah blah blah and I fell for it. Never believe anyone by the way when they say I've never acted like this before.
Yes. Because that that shit does not come from nowhere, no. And that that did then translate throughout the whole the whole relationship, that line of that severe green eyed monster jealousy. Yeah. So yeah, that's. Definitely. Possessiveness of like, jealousy. Yeah, red flag number two. First date, talking a lot about their ex and especially saying how crazy their ex is. Yes. Yeah, it is. It's important.
It's a really important topic. Do you think that it's good to like talk about ex's past relationships because it's kind of a bit of like an ICE broker in a weird way? Because it's like, well, how long have you been single for? Blah blah blah. And you naturally fall into it. However, if they are. Obsessively. Talking about their ex throughout the day. Red flag. Yeah, And especially if they're like, she was on crazy fucking bitch, blah blah.
Because like, as you go on in the relationship, you can be like, God, yeah, she was fucking mental, but like you. Could talk about it specifically, but yeah, if you're outwardly saying it from like the instant moment being like she's this, she's that, she's this, you're overcompensating. You've got something to hide. And and then on that as well on the other side, as if they absolutely refuse to talk about their act, that's also that's also a red flag within that red flag.
You know what's another red flag is when they will, they'll say no, no, I'm trying to be good, I'm trying to be good. That's red flag. Yeah, yes. Like you're on a date with them and they're like, no, no, like I'm trying to be good. I'm trying to stay under the radar. I'm trying to be good.
Yeah. You're like, OK, you're trying to come across as no, but also you're trying to come out across as a bit of a fat boy, a bit of a I'm a changed woman now because I don't fuck around as much or whatever. So just don't ick. It really is. I hate it. What is with it? There's a certain calibre of lesbians and if you don't, follow So Colustian on TikTok. My God. You need to because she depicts and portrays these type of
lesbians so fucking well. But there is a certain calibre of fuck boy lesbian that is. I'm sorry I'm just going to call you out. There is just such a level of not only cringe, but why would you actively want to be bringing toxic masculinity over to the lesbian community? Yeah, so they love acting like a fuck boy and like yeah, like I could get any girl I want and they like love me like. Or like they laugh at everything that you do.
Like they snicker at you. Say for instance like you make a mistake or something and they're like. I'm like, wow, yeah, yeah. What are you doing? Wow. And also when they, I get it with sometimes fat boys that I meet, they jump straight onto the you're intimidating or you're a bitch. And it's like, no, no, I'm not. I'm just not pandering to yours. There's a difference, right, between saying you're intimidating. What that translates to is I'm intimidated. Yeah, not you're intimidating.
No, no, no. And it's always the same type of person that says that to me as well. Because like we've mentioned this before, we go out and we meet people and make friends so easily. And like, I always get on with people generally. And like, we always have such a good time. There's always a certain calibre of person who will say that to me. And I know they're gonna say it before they even say it. I just like, especially when it's like men, if you try and talk to them and then they're
like you're shouting. It's like I'm literally talking in my normal. No, that's when I'm debating with them always winning. Oh yes. And then they tell me I'm shouting and I'm like, I don't need to shout shouting at me. Can you please my? Mummy's gonna come round in a minute and spang your bossy you're. Shouting at me and it hurts my cry. Please do that voice more. Oh. I'll watch the toilet cry. Third red flag. I've got one, I've got one.
What, don't like dogs? That is the biggest wrestling. Biggest have ever. That is actually the biggest one. Yeah, one of the biggest ones, yeah. Like if you don't like dogs, get the fuck out of my life. Agreed. If you're a dog hater and a cat lover, you're worse than just a dog hater, but yeah. Yeah, that's so true. I just honestly, because also I would lose all faith in someone's humanity, everything, if they didn't like dogs.
Because I'm like, if you don't like dogs, Oh my fucking God. Wow. I know. I can't even think about it because I would run out of that room crying. I know. I'd also say if you go on a date with somebody and it doesn't matter what job they're in, they could be a barista, they could even be unemployed. It doesn't really matter. I don't want to sing about baristas. I was a baristas. This is what I'm saying it if they don't have any ambition at all.
So if you're also if they don't expect the staff, so if you go for a drink with someone or go to dinner and they're rude to staff. Yeah. That walk away. Massive red flag. Massive red. Flag if they don't, say thank you to the waitress if they refuse. Got another one if they call their dad daddy. So true. Daddy. I'm just going to call go. Call me Daddy. I'm just going to call Daddy. Let me also say lack of
generosity, yes. So it's not about so much flexing like oh, I'm going to pay the bill or anything like this. But if there's like a real, you can really tell someone by when that bill comes along how genuine they are about like I So now I think rule of thumb is because obviously lesbians, it's very different, right? There's no man, there's no woman, there's no that patriarchal bullshit anyway. But I do believe that whoever invited the person on the date has to buy the first round of
drinks. Yes. And then and then I think offered to pay for dinner as well, because if you asked, you should offer to pay for dinner. If the other person insists on splitting, that's fine because that other person wants to do that. And then it comes into like etiquette of allowing that person to pay. But I absolutely agree if you've invited you. And you've chosen the restaurant because it's like, agreed. You could go and choose some
like fancy fucking restaurant. And then it's the other person can't afford. Agreed. Yeah. Talking of relationship dynamics, someone submitted a really interesting question that we are now going to talk about, which is what do we think about experienced gaze and baby gaze dating? So I'm going to hand the mic over to you first, Fred. So as usual I have a lot to say about this, but I want to get your opinion first. More seasoned gays with the with the baby gay can be a little bit tricky.
I think it really is subject to your baby gay, right. So if we were to look at it subjectively, it's like a baby gay that has had zero experience and is quite naive as a person and maybe emotionally younger immature just in that
emotionally immature. You're looking for trouble because you've got yourself a well seasoned lesbian who if they're in a relationship with a baby gay, it's going to be not only a lot of like lesson learning, but also this baby gay is probably going to fill full real hard, real fucking quick. Not only that, it's also going to most of the time they would have probably been with men before as well. They will have a lot of. Barriers to barriers, yeah.
Or like, yeah, like internalised homophobia to breakthrough. That internalised homophobia is a massive 1. So say for instance, you might be so comfortable with walking down the street holding hand with your girlfriend and all of a sudden you're now with a baby gay who will not fucking do that. That is pathetic as well by the way. Grow up. Yep, also a big. Unless you're in fucking Syria, but you're not. You're walking down London.
You can hold hands, it's fine. It's a power straight and you know, straight relationships and lesbian relationships if you are with a younger person, I think more so with straight power more likely off to be they're more likely to be younger. Whereas you can have a baby gay that is the same age as the seasoned gay. Does that make sense? You could both be like 25. Yes. It's not always age, it's always about. Their age, but it's like it's the experience they may have
only just come out great, right? So this is this is the difference. But and another thing I want to talk about, I want to say is like, I don't care how hard you've fallen for your first love. If you're the baby gay, I don't care how how hot she is, I don't care how hard you've fallen for her.
You will wake up one day I want to fuck another person, guaranteed, like you will if you're a baby gay and you've realised you're gay and you've never had a sexual experience with a woman before and you meet a woman and I know that you'll be having. Can I just say your first ever sexual experience with the girl that you're with? Yes, that's what I mean. This is and then you're like, this is amazing. I'd never want for anything more. This person's amazing.
I'm in love with them. I can almost guarantee you would wake up 1 morning and start talking. Can I just say though, this is not subject to Chrishell and? G Flip. Because let me just say, but we. Don't know if I. Fucking love you. Chrishell, the way that you have handled this whole situation, you're a fucking icon. She's a fucking legend.
Have you seen an actual legend? If you guys haven't seen the new release of the promo which our PR manager lives sent over to me the other day, she knew I'd fucking love it. She said peace sign, peace sign. I watched it and I loved it because she basically was like, people think that I'm having a mental breakdown. No, I'm having an awakening. And like for me, I'm like, bitch, you've handled this so
incredibly well. I wonder if she listened to episode 1 where we said gay awakenings and she took that. Oh yeah, because it's never been said before. No, it hasn't. We definitely formed the basis of that. Oh, yeah, I'm sure we don't 100%. Yeah, it's actually in the dictionary now because of Michelle. Please listen to it. But yeah, no G flip. G flip is insane as well. And you know that G flip is potentially the best person for all know. G flip, you know, all around lovely fucking person.
Yeah, I just know that G flip. G flip is a fucking Angel. Yeah, G flip is super talented. An Angel can tell that person is great. Like a proper. Good person. And that's exactly but Chris Shell was fucked over the left, right and centre by men. Yeah, life. I mean, we say that you know that wouldn't like you're saying I'm defending them that it would definitely work between them. I have no, I have no qualms that they'll get married and have loads of children together.
It's going to happen. I hope so. We also don't know that Krisha wasn't fruity before G flip and had other sexual. I mean, it doesn't mean. We can't guarantee that. We can't. No, I hope, I kind of hope she has because I think it would make it better in the sense of like, you know. It it I think if she hasn't, I think the only reason would be because she's always had men, right? And also, you know, G flip being non binary encounters a lot of masculine energy and feminine energy.
And so there's multiple kind of, you know, layers there as well, I think. You could have a lot of fun in that relationship because of the different dynamics because I also think that Chrishell has obviously a hell of a lot of feminine energy. She is so woman, right? Just looking at her, but you can tell that she's got a masculine energy as well. She's very and I. Hate to bet Chrishell's daddy sometimes in the veteran.
I fucking hope so, yeah. Yeah, but she's very, I don't want to say that daddy equals successful, but in the terms of daddy, like, she's super successful. She's a fucking boss bitch. She's got a lot of power behind her. I think this is proven by the way that she's dealt with even coming out to the media, because it's not even like she was secretly dating G Flip for years. And then suddenly, no, straight away she was like, yeah, I found this person.
Fucking love them. I'm having the best time of my life. And it's still going really, really well. So, yeah, cheers to you guys. And it's in America. Yeah. Oh, being a business woman in America as a realtor as well as a real estate agent. A very mild dominated environment and you kind of have to reflect that energy and. She has broken down every wall. Yes, yeah, Two blackberries. Yeah, yeah. Yes, 100 it. Really is 2 blackberries. Oh man, I miss a BlackBerry
Little BBM pen. So yeah, yeah, our. Thoughts on season gays and baby gays I It's obviously always dependent on the situation. Like we say, you can have a baby gay who is very mature, very experienced in life, very much knows what they want from life and knows who they want from life, but that nine times out of time where the baby gay is not
going to be the case. So I would have to say I vote against it. Generally, I think if you're a baby gay and you're going for an older, more experienced gay, you will struggle to keep up and you will feel extremely overwhelmed. And I think if you are a seasoned gay going for a baby gay, I think you're setting yourself up for a heartbreak, worry and a lot of emotional birds as well. It's it's an emotional bird. So yeah, I personally, I, I don't think it's a good idea, guys.
I'm like, I'm, I don't know. Why are we fucking bothered doing this? Because you're gonna do, you're all gonna fucking do it anyway. You're. All gonna do it anyway and also like they've do a bit like baby gay is gonna have a first fucking relationship somewhere So what you're gonna. Do, let me tell you, don't do it. You're all gonna do it anyway. You're all gonna suffer. Good luck to you all. Yeah. And I can't move on to the Horror Story. The Horror Story is to come from
that because. Lesbians never listen. So I can sit here and give you, tell you guys not to do something else, come home. And as we've mentioned before, you'll still think you're special. You'll still get engaged with in two weeks, you'll still go fucking, you know, 5000 miles between you all. Don't get a tattoo. On the side of your body. After you've been with somebody that you've been with for eight months. All right, guys, this Horror Story. I love this.
She actually even put sit back for this. Are you ready? Who so a woman emailed this a couple of days ago and I'm looking forward to reading out to you guys so many years back. I'm out with a friend and she's getting with this girl she's been chatting to for a while. She's got a friend there now, as you imagine the whole I've got a friend and she's got a friend, so why don't you hook up? I'm guessing this girl is Northern.
She said use use hook up Sitch happened to be honest wasn't feeling it or the girl, but I got bored. So why not a girl's got needs? That's giving you. That's giving me set the scene. Grim student halls. We have all been there. Oh Jesus Christ, I'm so glad those things are over. I know. This is Manchester Uni, Yeah, I'm asking now I. Know Manchester uni? Can you confirm if this is
Manchester uni please? And whilst my friend and her gal are doing what they're doing whatever, me and her friend are just sat chatting and because food is everything I'm obviously that sat there like so I'm ravenous here girl. This is also giving you so me I'm like where's the food? You where's the food? I'm sat in your shoes. We were out for drinks the other day and we had to take like mid
drinks in the in the evening. Take Freya into home slice, yes, so she could sit there and eat a pizza to continue the night because she was so. Yeah, but I fucking also, I loved it and I hadn't eaten for hours. I know baby, I'm just saying she's my dinner energy. She is giving me energy, to be fair, she said. I'm Scouse, so imagine that. Oh, we need someone to do a Scouse. OK, so it could be Liverpool? University. It's obviously a Liverpool uni.
Yeah, but she could have gone to Francesca being in Liverpool. And she walks me to her section of the cupboard. This I'll come back to. Let's just say it was a no from me from this again furthers my boredom. So I'm now about to go down on her to past. To past. Time past the time when fuck my life I take her knickers off with what I can only describe as every beef flavoured, crisp or food item has twatted me in the face. Swatted.
She said why didn't I see this coming when her section of the shag cupboard was brown. Everything beef flavoured, every single thing. Crisps, pot noodle also fucking cubes a lot. I felt I had a face planted beef flavouring. I can't even tell you how strong it was. Absolutely no. Bye TRA. See ya. You're welcome. Never spoke to her again. I'm assuming that must have been salty as well because you know they're like fake seasoned beef. Things it doesn't even smell like. Very salty.
It's like beef, beef flavour. It's like a sour salt. Do you know what I mean? I mean, she was bringing a whole new meaning to beef curtains. We'd. We'd hate it. Beef Curtain. That's even worse than as Barry hate it because we don't like meat. No imagine. Imagine but even the fact that she didn't even fancy it because she was like, I'm just doing this to pastime. I'm doing it to pastime. So it's not even like she had like an amazing vagina that was like, yeah, it was just a beefy
cunt. I'm just trying to. I'm so sorry though. Does she have an obsession with beef? Beef flavoured things then, obviously. She must have a real craving for beef all the time. What kind of deficiency do you need to have to have a? It's giving iron, I reckon it's. Giving iron. It's giving an iron deficiency. It's giving. Or like magnesium, Do you know what? That's definitely a metal deficiency. That's giving like parental abuse. That is why.
Is it giving parental? It's giving PTSD, it's giving you've got to be mentally ill to only be flavoured things you do. I do not think, no, I don't know. If I what mentally. Stable person would select. I just think it's a niche thing because like, loads of people are obsessed with cheese, right? Yeah. So like. What's it cheese? Crackers. Cheese. Cheese. Flavours, cheese, crackers, just. To be fair, maybe that's a load. Of cheese. Maybe that isn't it. Do I? Do I taste like cheese?
You don't, just a bag of what's it? As soon as you go, you do not taste like what's it? Fuck's sake, you don't. Don't out yourself. Look, I do love these horror stories of outing other people, not ourselves. I I think it's hilarious. Did you do? You have a message or said I like by the way, like I know you love beef because I saw your cupboard, but you need to sort that out like you need to start your diet. Your pussy smells like beef as well and. She's there with like beef
squash, but to be fair. This girl could go on and find a partner who also loves beef things and they could live in beef heaven for the rest of that fucking life it. Could have also just been that day, you know? No, no I don't. She may have like washed down an octo cube and then. Had a long day and the purse is not 100% fresh. Where's the beef? Marcello has just showed us a T-shirt that says where's where's the beef? That is a brilliant. Fucking love. That is a brilliant 1.
So do I. Where's the beef? Where's the beef? Where's the beast and where's the beef? Oh man. Yeah, she could. Find someone steak sandwich. Loves a good bit of beef and gets sheer enjoyment from Look Look. Everyone's got a cakey day, everyone's got a cake. Yeah, there is someone for everyone. That is someone for everyone. That's. Depressing. That is depressing. Somebody likes that. I think it's good. I think it's enlightening, actually. I don't think, isn't it?
I think it's like, oh, that's really sweet. What that your kink is a beef Sound like a. Well, if it is, then they've met a dream person. Yeah. Fair. I'm I'm not here to charge. If you want a beef purse, you go for it. Go for. It girl what made me laugh was during COVID. COVID porn. Started COVID porn what would like masks no. I don't, I don't think I really have a kink do. You want to know something?
I just love women like my kink are women is titties, bums, titties, bums, vaginas, titties, titties. The Holy Trinity? No, but. Titties. I was going to say those titties. Do you want to know? Shut up. Do you know that with titties, with kinks, apparently they're hereditary? So if you have a kink, it's come from your parents, either one of them. So that was the end of that beautiful Horror Story. Guys. Keep sending them in. Yes, please.
A lot of the horror stories you're sending in though are more kind of like relationship advice, relationship questions, etcetera, which we've been disgusting, disgusting. We have been discussing and strategizing about and we don't think the lesbian Horror Story segment is right for these. But comment DM us and tell us how would you feel about us doing ad hoc lesbian supper club agony aren't. Relationship so we could do like an advice episode.
Because we're thinking of doing it and also I mean want to know if you guys would like it. I think it's well like AQ and a like I feel like we get some questions coming in so we really good to like put that all in one place and we can squash some shit. We've got so, so many plans for this podcast. Guys like, I don't want to blow our own trumpet, but they are fucking iconic. And I cannot wait to keep like start.
Yeah, all of the multiple things that are going to happen that are absolutely going to. Involve every buzzing our tits off. Every. I don't have any tits. There's four buzz in. The mind I'll buzz off everyone else's tits. Buzzing, but thank you guys for listening to episode. Not really. We're talking about tits again. We're back on Tits I. Love, we love. We love you so much. We love you even more than tits, and that's coming from me. Maybe that's not.
I'm not gonna advocate that. Well, I don't love. I don't love you more than tits. But I think you'd respect, you'd all respect me for not loving you more than tits. Because I. Think you'd all understand where we're coming from, but yeah, we will see you guys next week. Bye Lesbos. Bye Lesbos and heterosexual straight women that hate their husbands. See ya.