H!TITDS - Puzzle (1974)

Before we talk of other things, who the hell am I? I'll tell you who you are. You're a dirty son of a double-crosser, a stupid con artist, who thinks he can pretend that he's lost his memory. Well, I'll get it back for you. No, hold it, hold on. Got it back already, have you?

Hello, and welcome to Hello, This is the Doomed Show. I am Richard. Folks, I am very excited, because the stars have aligned, and I finally got a long time talking about we're going to do this one-day person. Here they are. It's Darren Burrows. Hello, Darren.

Hi, Richard. How are you?

Great. Great. Glad to have you finally.

I have been looking forward to this, which we finally got, you know, the date together a few weeks ago. You mentioned like what film to do, and I was in two minds. I think I'll give you two or three films. But they are the one we settled on, which we're going to cover today. I'm really excited to talk about.

Big same, big same. And this is Puzzle from 1974. It is a Duccio-Tessari joint. And it's the Italian title is La Uomo Senza Memoria, directed by Duccio Tessari. If that name is familiar to your Giallo fans out there, it's because he directed the Bloodstained Butterfly. And also Death Occurred Last Night.

Which has recently just come out on Blu-ray.

Yeah, that one I need to be in a good headspace for, because it's so sad.

I've never seen it. So is it kind of like a police type film I've heard as well? Yeah, it is.

It is absolutely a, I consider it a Giallo for sure. It is just a gut punch.

Okay, so I just bought the Blu-ray, so I'm looking forward to watching that. Because I've had that film for so long on such a rubbish copy.

Yeah, it's definitely rubbish. I think you'll enjoy it. But yeah, just be prepared.

Would you put it on a par with the Bloodsteen Butterfly?

You know, it's been so long since I saw the Bloodsteen Butterfly. I would literally watch them both again to answer that question. Because it's been so many years.

It's been a while for me, but I remember really liking that one. I like some of the stuff in that. Like you got like an Argento style kill without giving anything away. And then you've got, I think it's like a court drama part as well in some of it.

But that's that's the part I remember less fondly.

Yeah, yeah. But I think it works. I think everything works in that film. Yeah. But this one, though, I think is just well, I can't wait to see your views on this one. But right.

Well, I'm going to play a very long trailer. This is it's a good trailer. It's in English, which is, you know, sometimes tough to find with a Giallo. But it's in English. It's just a very long trailer. So let's get this thing out of the way here.

The doctor says I'm scared, scared of what I'd remember.

Your name is Ted Walden. You were born 30 years ago here in jolly old England, at Brockhurst in Canton. You lived here on the continent and in New York. You got married two years ago to an American, married. Now then, buddy boy, you tell me where the...

That's a bad news setter.

It's from my long lost husband.

He disappeared in London. This means they set up our meeting. And whoever they are, they're killers. It has to be the work of a sadist or a madman, I think. No one in their right mind would do a thing like that.

I'll kill you if you even try to bring Sarah into this.

Well, that's a good start. You're getting back at a character again. But who am I?

A dirty rotten bastard.

Let's quit kidding around. The stuff, where is it, buddy? What I want looks like a big string of sausages. Don't! A big string of white sausages. When I said I was going to kill you in five days, I wasn't kidding.

This is where I give you yours, Ted.

Do you remember? What does it mean?

Try to remember, Ted.

You've got to remember. You've got to.

Before we go any further, we're going to swirl this thing, and, you know, with the Giallos, you definitely don't want the ending beforehand.

Right.

And especially one that's this good. Here's the plot synopsis from IMDb. An amnesiac man and his estranged wife restart their romance. Only to find themselves hounded by unscrupulous figures from his past life. The aforementioned Duccio Tessari, he also co-wrote this with someone named Roberto Infaskelli.

Yeah, you said it better than I would.

Oh man, I'm trying. He wrote my wife's absolute favorite Italian film, Night Train Murders. Hey, Lietta. What's the matter? Don't you like Night Train Murders?

Oh man, I love that film. I know for a female, it's quite a hard film to watch.

Yes, that's the one when anyone asks her what is the least favorite thing I've ever shown her, she always brings that one up.

And I totally get it as well. But for me, surprisingly, that would be in my top 10, 15 movies of all time, which I don't know if that says a lot about me, but not for those type, you know, the really yucky scenes in it, but all the other stuff I love.

But this dude, he also produced two things, The Sunday Woman, which is really good, and also Doppio Delito, aka Double Murder, which is also funny that both of those have some nice comedic elements to them that I really enjoy.

I think the murder weapon in The Sunday Woman took me by surprise a little bit. Yes. Very much like the Sister of Ursula, like in terms of that.

What a weird double feature, like...

Yeah, yeah. I kind of, the comedy took me out a little bit of The Sunday Woman. I didn't really like it that much. You can't not, you know, not see that for the ending as what it is really, but...

Exactly.

Yeah.

Very silly. I enjoyed it. Another guy who wrote this was Bruno D. Geronimo, which I'm like, is that Italian Geronimo? I love it. I would have never, I've never come across that name as an Italian name before.

Yeah, yeah.

Love it. He wrote The Weapon, The Hour, The Motive. He wrote What Have You Done to Solange? And he also wrote Paranoia, the Carol Baker as a race car driver movie.

That's a great one as well. That's a pretty good set of films that he's wrote, really.

Telling you. I've been dying to re-watch that one. Good stuff.

Oh, yeah. Is that the one on the lengthy box set? I think it is, yeah.

Absolutely is.

Yeah.

As far as this cast, it's led by Senta Berger, who is just absolutely gorgeous. And then she plays Sarah Grimaldi. She was in a French Giallo that I know I've seen called Diabolically Yours.

Okay, yeah.

I don't know much. I feel like I mention it just because I've seen it. I don't remember enough about it.

That's the 1967 film.

Yeah.

That's when I've got an old file on. We're talking about when we make files, we go on hard drives and stuff. I've got that, but I've never watched it. I think I may have the subs as well for it, hopefully.

I bet you do. Her husband, her estranged husband, whose name Ted, aka Peter, is played by the one and the only, Luke Morenda. Oh, man. Luke Morenda, what a joy. He's done so much great stuff for Giallo and crime films. He's a bit of an acrobat. He loves to jump and kick people or jump and tackle people or just something. He has the best fight scene ever in Torso. Oh, my God.

Yeah, absolutely. Yeah, dude. He's kind of Italian royalty, I'd say, in terms of actors.

Good call. I want to say he was talking about injuring his back a bunch of times doing these crazy stunts in a documentary. I forget. I don't know if that was him or not. It probably was, though.

No, that's saying to be right. Yeah, because he was alive up until at least a few years ago. I'm not sure if he's died recently. Maybe.

Maybe. I'm not sure.

He was definitely alive, because he was doing interviews up to a few years ago. But that's saying to Berger. She starred in The Testament of Dr. Mabuse.

Oh, really?

I was reading up. And she's also in Sherlock Holmes and the Deadly Necklace with Christopher Lee from 62 as well.

You know, I still haven't seen that.

I've never seen that, no. But I would absolutely want to, yeah.

So, next up is Daniele, although I am going to call him Reinhardt because that's how they kept referring to him in the movie. This is Umberto Orsini, who was in what I think is a great exorcist ripoff called The Antichrists.

Oh, I've never seen that one. That's Salpert, Ode to Matina.

Yeah, it's a little overly long, but I never notice that it's long. It's so weird and over the top as, you know, as exorcist ripoffs can be.

My mate, he actually loves that.

Nice. Nice.

Everyone I spoke to loves Antichrists, but he was actually in I was gonna ask you about this film, a Giallo called Interrabang, 1968, have you seen that one? I think you may have added that in one of your books.

It's definitely in the book, I'm trying to remember it. Oh, it's a really weird one. Yeah, it's very, the tone is very mysterious. It's got the dude from Watch Me When I Kill in it. Yeah, it's a very strange film. It's definitely a wee bit pretentious.

Okay, yeah, that's what I've always wanted to see and never got right into it.

Yeah, it's definitely not bad. It's just weird. Thank you for calling. Thank you for picking up on that. I had no idea he was in that.

It's weird that some of these actors and you kind of look up their filmographies and you think, shit, I wish I'd checked that out when I had the chance. Some of the early Giallo, some of these actors are done, it's mind boggling when you think about it.

Yeah, the 60s was just nothing but as soon as they got over the whole spy film thing, because I never liked the spy film, the Bond rip offs that much, because they wanted to get into those thrillers which were always, okay, not always, 90% of the time were inheritance schemes or, hey, my rich husband sucks, you're my lover, help me kill him, you know?

Right, that's what Umberto Lenz started then, really, didn't he? Because you've got Bava, it's got the old fashioned kind of what Darryl Jengel took to another level, you know, with the Black Blood Killer, but then I don't mind some of the, you know, I know a lot of people that don't like the Lenz-y ones, the early Lenz-y ones.

Yeah. As you get more obsessed with the genre, you're going to be watching stuff that you've never thought. Like, I'll watch a, I'll watch an Italian film that was released around the time of the Gialli that can be almost any genre. Like if it has an urban setting, I'm into it. If it's like 1971 urban setting, even if it's just a drama, I'll watch it just to accidentally get that Giallo vibe from it.

Yeah, exactly. I'm exactly the same because I've recently watched Lucio Fulci's Four of the Apocalypse. I've never seen it before.

Wow, nice.

Dirk absolutely thinks it's a masterpiece. I was kind of disappointed a little bit, but I will say now I've let the film process in my mind a little bit more. I think I'm going to go back to it and love it because everyone I speak to just sings his praises all the time. I just don't think I was expecting the film. It was. Yep.

I had the same exact reaction where I was like, wait, what is this? Like I'm like, okay, it's this Spaghetti Western by Fulci. It front loads a lot of violence in the beginning and then it goes on a journey. So it's a journey film.

Yeah.

And I did not expect that at all. And yeah, I think you and I probably had the same initial reaction in hindsight. It's like, ooh, there's something special there.

Yeah. Second time, you think? Yeah. But Thomas Millian, as well, is one of my favorite actors in that.

Yeah. Nice.

He's amazing.

So next up in the cast is Anita Strindberg, another Giallo queen. Just unbelievable. This is my favorite thing. She plays an American and her character's name is Mary Kane.

Yeah.

American and American.

I know. Yeah. Yeah. I know we'll come on to the actual film plot and all that, but I would love to see a little bit more.

Yeah. I forgot when the first time I saw it, like, I forgot that her character shows up earlier. I had only remembered her with the car scene.

Yeah.

And I thought it was so bad that they had just had her in that one moment, completely forgetting that I'd seen her in the other, the rest of the movie, at least, you know, not a lot. I mean, I don't think we even have her listed in our key scenes.

Yeah, probably not. Yeah.

She's in it. We've got Bruno Corozari as George. George is our heavy in this movie, well, one of, and one of a couple of heavies. But this guy, seven bloodstained orchids, and that's just the tip of the iceberg. He was in one hundred and one hundred and three things in his career and on the psychic.

Yeah, it was bulls**t because he was actually in for the apocalypse. That's what brought it to my mind. And then he teamed up with him again for the psychic. Yeah.

Nice. Nice. Yeah, he's great. I always love him.

Oh, man. He's in a few crime films as well, if I remember rightly.

Absolutely.

He also did a Mario Bava film, Roy Colt and Winchester Jack, which I've never seen.

I have seen that years ago. That is a very strange movie. It was like one of those. I think it was another one of those. He was a hired gun. Like the director dropped out last minute and he had to take over. It's really cheap. It is like threadbare.

Is that like a it's not what is it Western?

It's absolutely a Western. Yes. Oh, yeah, Tom fillet he is in this as Dr. Archibald T. Wildgate's Tom fillet. He was in tons of stuff. The movie I always think about him first is Nightmare City.

Yes.

He has the funniest character arc in Nightmare City. I want to say he's like the military science officer. And they're like, Hey, military science officer, go study this weird disease. And he's like, I'll be right back. And then the next time you see him, he's fucking gurney, just dead from the disease.

Yeah, that film is wild, man. Nightmare City. I have so much fun watching that.

I remember being so disappointed in that movie the first time. It was not what I was expecting. It was not what I wanted. And then I rewatched it. It was when Jeffrey and I did an episode on it way back, like episode. It was like the second episode Jeffrey was on, on the show. So like, you know, 10 years ago, that was my second viewing was for the podcast and I loved it.

And it weird how a film can do that, though. You know, you watch it first time, don't like it, go back, give it a bit of time. And then you think, what was I doing, like, you know, was I on drugs or anything? Why the hell didn't I like it the first time?

And that one's had a complicated Blu-ray history because like the the Rero video Blu-ray, it looked good, but the color timing was off. So a lot of the bright colors were kind of yellow. So it was it was a sharp image, but then it wasn't the right color. It looked off. And then Aero video did a Blu-ray of it. And the copy they had was damaged, chemical damage on it because it would look like it would have been left out in a toilet for a while. It was so bad.

Yeah, yeah, probably the best we're going to see. Yeah, you need a mixture of the two together, really, but I believe I have to have both. But I mean, it's Nightmare City, you know, I'm quite happy watching it like that, you know, with damage and grimy, give it that grind ace feel, you know, you go work in your favor type of thing.

I don't recognize Philip. Philip is the first guy is going to show up and harass Luke Morinda's character is going to harass Peter, aka Ted. But yeah, he's in a bunch of stuff. If I've seen him in something else, I don't remember.

Blink and you miss him type of thing.

And we've got Carla Mancini, the chameleon. She was I don't even know who she is in this movie. She's that lady that was in the the union, the Italian Actors Union. And so she has to be someone from that union has to be in your movie. So you get like kickbacks from that union to help her own produce, which is why she was in 241 movies. Yeah. And I always forget what she looks like. And then I always forget what character she played in the movie.

I can't remember what kind of she is in this.

Exactly. But look at her credits. It's crazy. It's completely insane. Like, every genre, she's just popping up as maid or whatever.

Some kind of tax scam or something like that.

Exactly, exactly. Last but not least, D'Uelio Cruciani is Luca, our special boy character. He is a child that lives near, he lives next door to Sarah's, Center Burger's character, Sarah. And he has decided that she's going to marry him when he's old enough.

And it is very creepy, their relationship actually, if you think about it.

But it's not her, she's not encouraging, she's not exactly discouraging it, but she's not making it worse. He's just in love with his lady, it's whatever. But he was in Don't Torture a Duckling as one of the kids.

Yeah, and he was in, I can't place the name off hand, but he was in one of Lainsey's crime films with Thomas Milan as well.

Oh, shit.

Cindy could say this. And that's a great film, because he plays a similar role of mine, you know, the little kid, you know, he's kind of done his own thing. But I actually think his dubbing in this is worse, well, I'm not going to say this, it's worse than Bob from Haste by the Cemetery. Yeah, I mean, just the moment he comes on screen with his, and do you know if that was his real voice? I don't know.

I can't be. I would be shocked if that was his real voice.

It is horrible, man. It is horrible. I think he did have a similar voice, or might have had the same voice actor when he did that. Cindy could say this as well. That kind of makes you think whether it was his, but I don't know.

Maybe he wasn't busy, you know.

Do you know if he went on to make any more films when he was older or anything?

I think he stopped while he was still a teenager. I don't think he got past it. I think the last credit was in like 1980 or something like that.

That surprises me because, you know, obviously apart from the voice, I think he's a decent little actor. Yeah, from what I've seen him in. Nice.

All right, let's dig into this plot here. This film opens up with our pal Peter, as we call him in the first part of the film here. He is an amnesiac. And he's at his psychiatrist's office, who is played by Tom Fellahey, who honestly, if he's your therapist, you're in big trouble. Because that guy, he seems like a kid.

Oh yeah.

Tom Fellahey's freaking character's name is Dr. Archibald T. Wildgate. The most like elaborate name ever.

Longest name you could have put on screen.

Oh man. Put him and Mary Kane in a room together. I think it'd be friend. So ridiculous. He gets reunited with his old friend Philip. Philip has contacted this therapist. And he's sort of going to have this big reunion to help good old Peter remember. Let's remember each other, right? This doesn't work. But in order to continue this therapy session out in the world, Philip follows Peter back to his place. What happens when he and Philip are alone together?

I mean, it is crazy because when they first initially meet, you think, you know, he knows this guy from somewhere, and they're going to get on with perhaps friends. But once they just get in this room, this Philip just freaks out. He just starts punching him. And it comes from nowhere as well, you know? It's not really a fight. I mean, it's just a one punch thing in it.

Philip is telling Peter, aka Ted, he tells him his name is actually Ted, that there's some stuff, there's some products, some merchandise, that they had stolen together. So they got to, he's trying to like squeeze the information out of him. And when it doesn't work, he pulls a gun and boom, gone.

Right. And the way he disposes of his body as well is quite funny.

He pulls down the Murphy bed and just throws the corpse in there and shuts it. Because as he's trying to figure out what to do with his corpse, a telegram from his wife shows up. Hi, you're my husband. Come to freaking Portofino, bro.

And I mean, was that in like a hotel as well with the fold up bed?

I'm guessing it was a hotel. It's a small flat. I don't know.

Because that's going to smell after a while. I mean, that's not the best idea he's ever had.

You can never go back. You're now... London is over for you.

Before we talk of other things, who the hell am I? I'll tell you who you are. You're a dirty son of a double-crosser, a stupid con artist, who thinks he can pretend that he's lost his memory. Well, I'll get it back for you. No, hold it.

Hold on.

Got it back already, have you?

Good old Ted, he moves on with his life and is headed to Portofino in Italy. And then we get to see some little boys swimming, having a swimming meet. And we get introduced to Sarah, aka Senta Burger. And we get to meet Luca, who I wrote in my notes as Luca the Infernal. So I referred to him. But yes, so he is, of course, being flirty with her. And it is what it is.

It's disturbing in a way, but I mean, it's not, you know, it's kind of it's all on his part, should we say, you know, she kind of doesn't discourage him, like you said earlier, but I mean, it's just like, you know, he's just infatuated with you or do anything for her. And it does come into play as well a little bit later on.

Yeah. And one of the other things about Luca is he's an amateur photographer, which I found really funny when we see his photographs later, they were definitely taken by like a professional photographer.

Yeah, it's quite funny.

This kid is a freaking wonderkin man. Wow.

And that comes into play as well, doesn't it? You know, the photographs.

Everything is earned in this movie. That's what I've found. And speaking of things that you shouldn't be surprised will pay off later. Let's talk about this chainsaw that's that's in here.

Right. So, yeah. And I mean, once you go back and rewatch the film, you can kind of tell it was just done this scene just to set it up. Yep. You know, what's going to happen on the film and that. But basically, yeah, I presume it's a gardener, Vittorio. He's using the chainsaw outside. And she just casually says, you know, by the way, will you leave that, you know, in the cupboard when you when you finish with it? And I mean, no Giallo films like we do.

Exactly. Yeah. It's called Chekhov's Chainsaw. That's what I call it. I just had my mind blown by who the gardener, but I'm going to save that for my trivia. Since I have no trivia for this, I suspect you have some trivia for this movie.

Yeah, I might have a little bit. Yeah.

But I'll save I'll save who the gardener is for later. She's borrowing this place. She's like, this is like someone's summer house, and she's been living there since her husband, Ted, disappeared. And for some reason, that means that the gardener who's keeping the place up has to borrow her chainsaw, which is fine. You know, that could happen. Why she keeps it in the cupboard in the kitchen.

Who knows?

That's that's that must be an Italian thing. I don't know.

Yeah, it's certainly not a British thing.

So so that night, our little dog, our little hero. What's the dog's name?

Whiskey.

I can't believe I forgot that they only say it six thousand times.

They do, actually. Yeah.

So so Whiskey's our little wiener dog and he's he's the literal best. He's the cutest dog ever. The dog is trying to warn her that someone is in the house. The dog is going ballistic and she's just like, oh, you're so funny. Do you want to drink a water? And then she gets chloroform and the next morning, cops are there and her house is trashed. But that's all that happened. Someone just turned over her house. Nothing's missing. They just went through everything.

Yeah, which is quite strange, you know, because and she acts as if like, it's just an everyday thing, you know, just, you know, this guy in the middle of the night chloroforms you and nothing's really ever said about that, you know, after the police, you know, turn up the next day.

She just acts like, oh, this has happened before, but I was never home before.

Yeah.

So finally, she is reunited with with good old Ted. There's a funny moment where she's waiting for him at the train station and he doesn't recognize her and keeps walking. But this mysterious gentleman named George tells Ted, hey, your wife's still waiting on the platform, dumbass. So he goes back. They're reunited. My favorite moment in this is that there's this really hot girl who he was kind of hoping it was his wife.

Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. And I wanted him to be like, oh, you're my wife. Okay. I wanted to remember her, though.

Right. Like, here is pretty hot as well.

I know I was just going to say.

Yeah. Yeah.

This is like probably the most beautiful I've ever seen her ever. It's incredible. Two whoppers, two whopper juniors and four coca-cola.

And would I have to wait long if you made one whopper with no pickle and no lettuce?

Back at the Place, something happens when Ted sees their clock. What was that about?

What happened in this film, right? It's all about kind of memory. He's getting his memory back every so often. You know, a little piece of the jigsaw puzzle kind of comes together. Pardon the pun, little puzzle. But yeah, so the clock has something to do with the plot or something to do with his past year where something's happened. But I don't want to go too much into it, but it will again come into play later on. Let's put it this way.

And it introduces that motif of his memory slowly coming back.

Right, yeah. Love it.

We get some fat shaming at the pool. The guy who's been romancing Sarah this whole time is Daniele, aka Reinhardt. You know, he's like a happening dude. He's got the high heeled shoes. He's got, you know, some nice tight pants on. He seems like a good guy, right? Right.

He's also a lot older than her as well, I think.

Yes. He works at the pool. He's like a swimming instructor slash coach for this boy's swimming team. And he's literally fat shaming this kid. And I'm like, oh, you gained some weight. Better be careful with all that pasta, buddy. And I'm like, have you ever heard of a growing boy? Have you ever heard of the phrase, kids grow so fast?

Right. And I was kind of confused what his role is in this school. I know he fat shamed that kid, but what is his actual role?

I made it up. I assumed he was like the swim coach slash swimming instructor. Could be right.

Could well be.

I don't know. Yeah. This is what more viewings will reveal to us. George gets punched in the face. He thinks he's following Ted around, but in fact he's not following Ted around because Ted sneaks up on him from around a corner and punches him right in the face. George has a habit of blowing his nose and leaving tissues everywhere. Very charming. What a catch this guy must be.

When we actually find out why he's following him as well.

He's been on this whole scheme. There's that merchandise. He wants that merchandise and it's worth a million dollars. And if he can't come up with it, because if Ted doesn't come up with it, both of them are going to get killed. He threatens Ted like, I'll kill your wife too. I'm not going out alone. These guys probably won't be buds at the end of the day.

But it's kind of not his best plan either is, because if he does kill him, he's never going to get that $1 million.

He should be bringing them like supplements like Ginkgo biloba.

Right, yeah, he should be his best friend.

Flashcards, do some flashcards, you know, do some like, listen to his favorite songs, you know, like, I'm just assuming that Ted, when he had his memory, was really into like the Macarena.

Is that really kind of well to do as well? You know, they're not poor people, anyone in this film. Apart from he's a little kid, gives you his Nana or whatever you put. Yeah, pretty well to do.

So unfortunately, this movie has our puppy pal doesn't make it. What happens with whiskey?

Right, so I think she comes back after letting the boy walk the dog, which is probably again, not the best things he's ever done. But this dog then it goes off the little boy then he started chasing around, you know, where's whiskey, where's whiskey. And then she gets back, Sabre gets back to her, you know, her boat, and then finds the dog slashed on the bed, which yeah, animal lovers, I know not going to love that scene to be honest.

But luckily it is such a fake dog.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. The actual concept is kind of brutal with a straight razor. And that's probably like there is one without jumping the gun, there is one kind of slash scene towards the end. But this is nothing like an Argento style, you know, black love killer or any of that.

Yeah, the budget was not going to be for the realistic effects on that. But the blood of the dog on the bed reminds Ted of something horrific he witnessed where he's standing there holding somebody from behind, like holding their arms behind them. And another figure is slashing the person's throat.

I mean, yeah, that's a really cool scene as well, because he has this flashback, I think with the mirror as well. Yeah. The mirror maybe jogs his memory and that. But yeah, that comes up a couple of times in his, you know, as he's piecing everything together. I thought that was a really cool scene, like one of the better scenes of the film, I think.

This woman, Mary Kane, she knows this gang of people who stole stuff, and she's trying to sort of seduce Ted and everything and try to help him jog his memory. Or if he's lying, that's the other thing, is people think he's lying about losing his memory. If she can trick him into admitting that he's not really lost his memory. When that doesn't work, she, I'm going to go ahead and spoil it, folks. She is a accomplice with our pal, Daniele Reinhardt. She like runs over Sarah in a parking lot.

Right, yeah.

Because it's literally sausage-shaped heroin bags all connected together, which would be very disappointing for whiskey. Had whiskey lived, whiskey would have wanted actual sausage. I don't think dogs like heroin, although you could train them to like it, possibly.

I'm pretty sure you could, yeah.

Don't have the time, honestly. But this leads to a frickin tense, super tense moment where Sarah's alone recuperating with her leg up on the thing. George pays her another visit. George has been harassing her. He's the one who tossed the apartment. He's the one who's been like just always around, always like starting shit, running the periphery and everything. But the first time he came to see her, he acted sort of friendly. He was menacing, but not in a obvious way.

I mean, yeah, I've got a little bit of trivia about that later. It was actually come from a film. I might as well say it now, but it was actually come from a film called Charade, which I think was made in 1962. I think that's the writer had the idea, because the character in that, I think it's Aubrey Epburn starting that as well. She's the one who gets thrown matches on. But yeah, that sort of gives the writer, I think, gestality may be the idea when they're doing the screenplay.

Oh, man, that cast looks amazing. Yeah, yeah. Ooh, James Coburn, shit.

I think he's the one that, you know, of course, of course he'd play the heavy.

Yeah. Cool. There you go.

I see.

It's so funny when filmmakers from the 70s are referencing older films. And it's like such a crap shoot. If I've seen it or not, I'm like, right.

I mean, that makes you want to go and watch it just for that connection. But it's probably going to end up being bad. But the cast, like you say, is amazing.

No, I'm pretty confident Sherrod's going to be a frickin great movie. That's my guarantee to you. Just don't hold me to it.

Right.

So he leaves her alone and lots and lots of stuff happens. If we went into all of the moments in this movie, we'd be here forever. Needless to say, she sees a photo that Luca took of Renee, of Reinhardt's Daniele meeting with Mary Kane. And she's like, wait a minute, that's the lady that ran me over. What the hell is going on with this cast? And she immediately starts ripping her cast off. And somehow she couldn't feel like the six or seven sausages of heroin. She asks Luca to hide them for her.

You've got to get the dummy drop.

Oh, shit, that was in my final thought there, but yes. When George goes flying over the cliff, magic.

Oh, awesome, yeah. Always good to see that.

Fairly convincing dummy, but it's just such a brutal... When it hits the rocks, it's like, oh!

I mean, that fight scene as well, preceded in the high school.

I love, whenever Luke Morinda got a chance, he would do a cool fight scene.

He'd end up doing karate chops and kicks and all sorts of...

So while he's on his way back, with his memory possibly restored, our pal, Daniele has totally dropped the mask. He is now just threatening to murder Sarah She locks herself in the kitchen and gets out that trusty chainsaw and they have a fricking chair versus chainsaw. And I wrote in my notes, never bring a straight razor to a chainsaw fight.

I mean, it's quite comical when you see her with the chainsaw and he's got this little ring against it. You're thinking, wow. It is so funny.

It's such a great moment. It's just so gonzo. I feel like once you got past the early 70s Giallo, there was always some gimmick with the later ones. There was always a Giallo with something else. So like autopsy is a Giallo with super, super grim, weird shit happening in it. And then this, I don't know, if Texas Chainsaw Massacre had come out and now this movie had to have something to do with the chainsaw in it or if that was like something that was always in the script, I have no clue.

Because you had the last ace on the left, didn't you? You had the chainsaw on that.

I always forget that was...

Maybe that was an influence, but this was the same year as Texas Chainsaw. So yeah, it would be interesting to see which one did come first.

But then the whole thing, this fight is just so epic. And of course, Ted bursts in pretending that he's on Daniella's side. And the chainsaw has now been dropped. It's lying running on the floor, which makes no sense at all. And then finally, I can't remember if Sarah pushes him or if...

I think Miranda, look, Miranda's character kicks him.

Okay.

And then he falls onto the chainsaw.

Which he would have to fall onto it and grab the trigger at the same time for it to do what it does, which is...

That's why I was going to ask you, because I didn't even know it. I thought it wasn't on. I thought as he fell on it, that he just comes on automatically. Something happened.

I think it was running, but it wasn't like revving. It wasn't obvious. Right.

It was very strange. Yeah, yeah. That makes sense.

So, hey, with the villain defeated, cops burst in and, you know, obviously way too late to do anything. And that's when, you know, Sarah being a good wife, she starts lying about all this stuff like, hey, my husband had nothing to do with anything. This is just some crazy shit that happened. And that's when Lucas like, no, let's tell the truth. Let's let's let's let's do this right. And I'm like, don't do that. Let's go with the lying part.

Right. And that's why I was going to ask you a question about the end and about your interpretation of it, because they kind of have this smile together after he says, you know, he's going to basically come clean.

Yeah.

And then it just ends. What's your take on that? Do you think he's going to go on and tell the police everything? Because that would make no sense, because both of them would be put away, yeah, for a long time. So I don't know the little luck they have. They exchange whether they're going to just, I don't know.

My guess is that Ted is going to walk away from this. I think he's going to come clean and have the both of them tell the entire story. And then he's going to roll over on all of his contacts. Now that he has his memory back, he's just going to roll over and just be a total freaking stool pigeon and then get witness relocation. Get out of there.

Yeah, yeah. That's my opinion.

What about you?

I just basically I've just baffled by, you know, I haven't really got a thought one way or the other. I'm just baffled why you would own her. And surely you would just deny everything and blame Danny out.

I love her shaking her head though. Like that last thing and she's just like shaking her head out. I'm like, no, we're going to lie.

I don't think the director even knew what they were going for, to be honest. Maybe, you know, they didn't have an ending written or something.

Exactly.

Which is surprising when you think of Staldy was part of the writing team as well.

Oh, shit, he was?

Yeah, there's three writers. Certainly for the screenplay, I think. Yeah. Okay.

I missed him.

Cool.

My husband had nothing to do with this. He's innocent.

I'd be dead if he hadn't got here.

Reinhardt tried to kill me.

I found out he'd hidden drugs in the cast he put on my leg the other day.

That's true about the drugs. I saw them. No, there's much more to the story than that, Sergeant. And I think we'd better have a long talk.

The producer on this is certainly no slouch, Luciano Martino, brother of Sergio Martino. So you've got-

And husband of Edwidge Finesse, I think, at the time.

My brain always forgets that, thank you for that.

And I mean, he's gotta get props for that, you know?

I know, I can't even process that. I'm so happy for him, even if it was only for a short while.

Exactly, man. Everyone would have wanted to have been in his shoes at that time, I think.

The composer on this is Gianni Ferriero. And man, one thing about this movie, its score is incredible.

It really is. Do you know what I was surprised like? I was surprised, it's kind of like the strange voice of Mrs. Ward in places.

Yeah.

That's exactly why I got out of it. I love the theme. I absolutely love the theme.

It's one of the most memorable. I've been listening to Giallo mixes of music ever since I got into this stuff. And there's pieces of music that are just like a signature of the genre. And this has one of those in it.

Absolutely. Yeah.

But Ferio, he also composed the music for Death Walks at Midnight, which another absolute freaking brilliant score right there.

That's what I'll be covering tomorrow on a future stream. It's going to do the two Death Walks and Forbidden Photos of a Lady of Suspicion. So I got them to watch overnight.

Oh, man, that's going to be a fun time.

I've seen them all, but it's been a while. So it's going to be like watching them for the first time, hopefully. Yeah.

That's how I am about Forbidden Photos. I have not seen that in years.

Yeah, I'm looking forward to that one.

The cinematographer on this, I wasn't really familiar with the stuff he shot. He shot a film that I did not like called Dead of Summer, which is tagged as a Giallo. But really, it's just artsy lady stuck in a remote location and she's an asshole movie. I don't really know. It's not great. But weirdly enough, he has a story credit on one of the worst Exorcist ripoffs ever called Return of the Exorcist.

That's a new one for me.

It's 1975. It's pretty rough. And you know, I like Exorcist ripoffs. This one is not it's not it's walkable. But man, it's it's so corny and bad. We have Richard Conte's in it and some other people. I'm trying to remember it has another title like possessor or something like that. Oh, man. Yeah, the possessor. The possessor.

Yeah, I've never used it. I wonder. I don't think.

When you're desperate, go for it. But I don't know if you'll ever be that desperate.

It can't be as bad as that one, though, can it be behind the door or?

Oh, see, I like Beyond the Door.

Beyond the Door. That's it.

Yeah, I like Beyond the Door. Those kids as we've talked about those kids before.

Those asshole kids.

Yeah, well, we're going to talk about how we feel about this film, what we know, if we loved it, liked it or I mean, obviously, we both hated this. But no, what's some trivia you got about the good old puzzle?

Right. So the film originated from La Fine Del Eternita, which was an unproduced idea that Gestaldi had concocted with Vittorio Salerno, I might have to say that again, Vittorio Salerno, where the protagonist has lost his memory. So that was kind of like a sci-fi storyline, which predated Back to the Future. Angeliol Rizzoli was going to produce it with Giulio Gemma, starring in the main cast where Luke Miranda would be. But Rosselli ended up dying in 1970 and it was kind of shelved after that.

So the only piece I found was by accident. So the Gardener, which we barely even see, and the reason I thought of it is because you said the Gardener's name was Vittorio. This probably Vittorio Fanfoni, who was in freaking, just to name a few. What have you done to Solange? Web of the Spider? Who saw her die? Beyond the Door? He's uncredited in The Antichrist. He's also in Eyeball, and he's the cop taking notes in Deep Red.

Wow, that's an incredible bunch of films. I would love to have that on my CV if I was an actor. That is, yeah, dreamlike films, really.

Darren, you picked this one because you wanted to hate watch it again, right? How do you feel about the shitty puzzle?

Right, so I come into this pretty late. So I first watched this, I would say a couple of years ago, maybe, because getting hold of the DVD was really hard to do. Oh, yes. I think there was a foreign one, like a Danish one, I think there was. But anyway, so I first watched it a couple of years ago, really liked everything about it. I liked the fact that it's more like a Hitchcock-Pockian type, you know, storyline. And it doesn't give you any real gore. It's very minimal, the gore.

Yes.

How about yourself? How did you first watch this?

I was one of the ones who picked up that foreign DVD. I think it was Dutch or something like that. It's it's in English. The dubbing is in English, but it's also got maybe the Italian. But then all the subtitles are languages I do not understand. So I've had that DVD forever. And surprisingly, it still looks pretty good. After all these years. But that was the first time I saw it was on that disc. And I thought it was really good.

Oh, you mean the one from the closing credits?

Yes. I'm still not in love with it, but I actually like that singer. It's Rossella Cannacini. And I'm trying to remember. She's got some cool songs. She was one of those female pop idols from the time. So she's got some cool tracks out there. But I definitely have softened in my cruel, cruel review of that wonderful jam at the end. As folks have heard in the trailer at the beginning, there's some really funky music in that trailer that I don't think is in the movie.

Yeah, I look forward to that when the episode comes out. Did you get this version? Have you bought the Blu-ray?

No, I just held on to my old DVD.

Got the Blu-ray MVD. It looks pretty good. There's a comedy track with Cat Ellinger, which I didn't get a chance to listen to. But yeah, it's a booklet and all sorts. I know this is not going to be for the podcast, because this is more visual. But yeah, if you get a chance, you might be able to get it cheap, because I got it fairly cheap. Nice booklet.

I totally forgot they put this up. That is hilarious.

Probably worth it for the comedy track as well.

I might just frickin upgrade. Why not?

Don't blame me to your wife for spending money.

Hey, you know, she'll get her cut. She gets my paycheck every two weeks. Before I let you run out of your screaming, Darren, I always ask my guests to talk about a recently seen and loved film, just a movie that you watched recently that can be any genre, no limitations. You got anything exciting you've seen lately?

Right. So I was going to say The Slayer, right? From 1982, but I spoke about that on a stream last week. So basically I'll say this one. So it's a British proto slasher from 1975 and it's called Debbie Strangers.

Oh, I've heard of that one.

So this has Hayley Mills in it. You've got this psychopaths going around kind of killing, you know, random people. But what happens early on in this film is you see someone escape from a mental asylum. We don't see where it is. It kind of turns into this road movie where all this bat shit stuff starts to happen. There's like interactions with these two bikers. People get murdered and like a woman gets murdered in the garage. A bit of a floozy woman as well.

That reminded me of another British one that I wish would get a release, which is Night After Night After Night.

Oh, man, I really need to see that one. Yeah.

So Giallo, it hurts.

I've got an old bootleg of it.

Yeah.

Never put it in.

The copy is watchable. I think we probably have the exact same version. It's just nothing out there for this movie. But yeah, I've really enjoyed it. But yeah, I'll definitely check out Deadly Strangers.

That's like a British Giallo, you said? I think I've read as well. Yeah. Night After Night After Night.

Absolutely.

But Deadly Strangers has got the same director as Assault. Have you heard of Assault?

In The Devil's Garden, right?

Yeah, 1971 film. So yeah, I'm pretty sure it's got the same director. Sidney Hales, I think it is.

My pick for my recently seen and loved is nowhere near horror at all. It could be horrifying if you were scared of going to the beach. It's called Where the Boys Are, 1960. I have seen part of the 1984 remake, which was a big 80s fun movie. Where the Boys Are is 1960s fun. It is about some girls who are tired of being snowed in at their college, so they go to spring break down in Fort Lauderdale. And it follows their little stories and it's really kooky.

Man, you got me interested though. It's fine. You know what you said.

Yeah, I love 60s cinema, so I love even like the corny stuff. It was a spring break over here, and so Lietta and I watched a bunch of spring break movies. And this one had always eluded us and we were totally taken with it. And it's got a really, really young George Hamilton before he turned into leather. And Paul Apprentice from The Stepford Wives, she steals the whole movie. She's great.

So you watch quite like a broad, you know, you're not just a horror guy. You do watch a lot, a lot of different subgenres and all that. How many like percentage wise, how many horrors, you know, that you say you watch in a week or a month or a year? That's a good question.

I think definitely as far as I'm always reaching for horror or Giallo or slashers. I think slashers that we watch and rewatch the most. And then we mix it up. We watch a lot of British mystery TV.

Yeah.

Inspector Morse and Poirot and Agatha, like any Agatha Christie adaptation. Then we have like every Elvis movie ever.

I think I remember you saying that.

Yeah, we're big Elvis movie fans.

Yeah.

We've got a fair amount of comedies like Clue and like sometimes some teen movies will sneak in there. I love there's a teen movie called Drive Me Crazy, which is one of my favorite fricking non-horror movies ever. It's just super silly stuff. So we watch a lot of like, we watch a lot of musicals, not the Rogers and Hammerstein, Rogers and Hammerstein. We don't watch those. Those are pretty dreadful, but like good musicals with like Fred Astaire, The Music Man. So we mix it up a lot.

Do you get burned out then, would you say on horror sometimes?

Maybe. I think that's why, I think that's what it is, is that when I'm watching a light movie, like, for example, like Hello Dolly with Barbara Streisand and Walter Matthau, it's like, it's such a treat to see people like live to the end of the movie. I don't know.

Right, yeah, yeah. I suppose watching like some bad films make you appreciate the Giallo even more.

And you know, Lietta has had as much of an influence on my viewing as I've had on hers. So there's a trade-off with what we end up watching. There's very few films in our collective non-horror collection that I would just not sit through with her. And you know, there's probably more stuff in my collection that she's like, oh God, not that one again.

Right, but she will sit down and watch Giallo from start to finish, yeah?

Dude, both books, both Giallo Meltdown and Giallo Meltdown 2, she was there for like, I would say, at least 80, 80, 85% of every single one of those.

Wow, you're a lucky man, because every girlfriend I've had wouldn't sit through any Giallo. Yeah, they see Edwidge Farnes and I guess they kind of get a little bit scared.

It's all about the compromise, because you know, like, even movies I don't, I used to not care for, I always tell the story that there's one called Practical Magic, which is a, it's a magic movie, it's about witches, but it's more of a romance kind of chick flick kind of thing. But it's so damn good that I finally gave in and was like, fine, I like it. So it only took like 18 viewings, you know.

Wow, yeah. I know I love wicks as well, yeah.

Yeah, because I can't, if I watch a movie, I don't want to see it again for another year. Like, I rarely watch a film like very often during the year, whereas Lietta, you know, she has her comfort movies and she'll watch those a lot.

I was going to ask you that as well. Like, so say, obviously you've watched The Argentines a million times. Oh, yeah. But like Martino films, how often would you say you watch something like say Torso or Strange Vice of Mrs. Ward? Do you watch them multiple times a year or just once now? Because you've seen them so many times.

Yeah, like when I first started collecting, I would watch, I had like 20 movies that were in Italian horror, Spanish horror, Giallo. So I had very little, very few. So I would back in the day rewatch like Phenomena over and over again, rewatch Zombie over and over again. And then more of my collection grew. I couldn't do that, so I would like, I didn't have time. I would just watch stuff once in a while. So sometimes I'll watch Torso and I won't watch it for like three years.

Okay, yeah.

And if I've covered it in one of my books, it's gonna be even longer. So that's why Puzzle, this is my first viewing of Puzzle in, oh my God, over a decade easily. Yeah, so I just cycle stuff around. I watched the Beyond. We had on Leap Year, we had a Leap Year this year, so on Leap Day, we picked movies that were out of time. The first thing I thought was the Beyond. I hadn't watched the Beyond for, God, at least six years. So I'm always cycling stuff out.

They're like a drug to me, though. Torso's like a drug. I've got to take every three months or something. Six months or whatever.

One of my goals was to get back to the Giallo I haven't seen in a long time. So this was great that you threw puzzle into the pile. The one I just watched two weeks ago for the first time was not for the first time. For the first time in like at least ten years was Plot of Fear.

Oh, wow.

And that one hit so hard. I had a great time with that. You know what?

I've not seen that probably about the same ten years. I can't remember much about it at all.

You will enjoy it, my friend. It's quite good.

I will definitely put that now on the watch pile.

Yeah.

The one I was surprised at going back to was Murder Obsession. I won't swear, but I love that film. I absolutely love that film. We picked it on... Because we do a thing on Dead Pits channel where we do like a Euro cult podcast. And I picked it on there and Dirk, Steve and Dana were watching it. I don't think they had the love I did, you know, for it.

I adore that movie. That is one of my like top five favorites right there.

You're the one who got me in to watching it. That gave me that push to watch it. And then after that, yeah, I'm glad you did.

That has made a great double feature for me with Death Smiles on a Murderer. Those two back to back are just so great. I love them.

Yeah. Yeah.

Well, sir, I'm going to let you get going. You want to tell us how the folks can find you on various podcasts and YouTubes?

Yeah. So we do this thing on every Saturday, usually. It's I Would the Kill. It's on Subjective Perspective Collective. We cover all things Giallo. We have, you know, Gas Richard's been on. We have Troy Hayworth a couple of weeks ago. So there's that. Keep a lookout for that. I do a Grind Haste Films on Visited by Voices 1, which we're doing next Tuesday. We're covering Hell Night and Humongous. That'll be coming out later on in the week. That's with Dan Stein, Dirk and Goraphobia's Keith.

Highly recommend. Well, man, thank you again for joining us.

No worries, man. It's been a pleasure as always.

Yeah. I'm glad we finally made time. I'll absolutely have you back on again for sure.

Oh, not anytime. Just let me know. The same with yourself. You know, we'll definitely get you back on sooner than later if that's okay with you. And we'll work out the subject and all that. Or you can pick one yourself, obviously. Yeah, and all that good stuff. So yeah.

Bye, folks.

See you.

Folks, thanks so much for listening to this episode. If you'd like to write into the show, send an email to DoomedMovieThon at gmail, or hit us up at DoomedMovieThon on Instagram, or at DoomedMovieThon on Twitter, or at DoomedMovieThon at Discord, or go to Hello This Is The Doomed Show on Facebook and message us there.