Down The Rabbit Hole.

Oh my gosh, Hello Jesus, welcome to Laura Kane After Dark. I'm leaking, okay.

Okay, no, I mean I'm not leaking.

Now. I'm going to give you some behind the scenes information right now to prove to you that whatever I say to my co host here, Eric Grimmer, goes in one ear and out the other completely off the air. We had this funny discussion about something that's in my kitchen, which we will discuss in a minute, and it was really funny, and I said, Okay, at the start of the show, I want you to pretend that the thing

What was that sound?

Oh my god?

What was that?

Okay, So that's so.

Why Lost of White Trash passed.

Okay, I have a bug zapper, the kind that you're supposed to put outdoors, uh huh, in my kitchen.

Nice because I can't.

With the flies. I can't with the flies, Like I leave the dwarf and sometimes to get air, till the dog out or whatever, and then like they all collected this window. I'm like, hell no, So I brought the bug zapper inside.

It's like a two story double widen. Here are there sheep running around or chickens somewhere?

Oh my god. The other night I was watching TV down here and the kitchens right here. I don't know what fluid, but it took, like I swear to God, a minute for it to electric cute. It sounded like it was like a like a rad heead crawled. God, it was like zap zap zap zap zap zabzap zap them?

What is it killing?

Didn't you go look?

I was just scared. I'm like, it's probably some giant spider or something that got in there.

I would burn my house down.

Oh my god.

But that doesn't need to be in my kitchen. That's I know, I know, that's gross.

That's you know you should have like I'm gonna I'm gonna, oh look right there, like what's on the paper.

Soon it'll be no. No, I need all these papers. I need all these papers. Give me that.

I'm a pro at killing flies.

Use your bare hand.

Oh my god, don't worry. The thing in the kitchen will do.

Wow, such a pros so dumb.

Oh my god. Okay, before we talk about the little event that we are planning where it's in the yes, the beginning stages. But I think it's we're on something big here. We are onto something.

I think we are.

I have also my psychic update part two. Oh, we had another discussion and she revealed some cool things. Okay, and then you have a great thing that you're talking to.

Yes, something I'm working on with a friend right now. Yes, you can be a part of so yes, everybody can be a part of it.

You know what else you can be a part of sCOD dad all coming up on the seventh of September. It's going to be so fun. It's a five k walk. It's the eighth annual and it's at Crown Point. You walk around the bay and it's hopefully, of course, it's going to be beautiful. It's time, You're always beautiful. September seventh, Yes, September seventh, And this goes for research, much needed research for.

SCAD spontaneous coronary artery dissection. It is a little known and poorly understood cause of a heart attack. Most patients are young, healthy and active women who do not have the typical respectors of heart disease. Although it's less common, it can affect men too. SCAD can reoccur and can be fatal. Researchers needed to identify the causes and the best treatment options. SCAD is the number one cause of heart attacks in women under fifty, pregnant women, and new moms.

So walk with us, Walk with Us. September seventh, You can easily enroll at Loricane after dark dot com so we have a really super easy click click Okay. Also, we love so much we wouldn't send you anywhere else for all of your cosmetic surgery realer Lakoya Cosmetic Surgery Center.

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All right, before we get into a round of random news and the question game, mm hm, we are planning. Did I talk about the wedding dress thing already?

Yes?

I did?

Or no on this episode?

Oh yeah, okay, we are planning on my bucket list that we did like last week. One of the things was I wanted to try on a wedding dress for the very first time because I never have I blah blah blah. Eric was like, Oh my god, we're gonna go. We're going to do it. And then I got dms from so many other women that were like, oh my god, I want to come. I want to do it. I've never had one on either that are like at same age. I'm like, I should we should make this like a thing.

Not fifty that would be way too why not? It would be fun.

I know it'd be great, but no, but we are. We are ironing out the details. So stay tuned for that. That should be really fun and cool, and we'll keep you posted and talk about your cool thing.

So a good friend of mine is doing this philanthrop right philanthropic event. We're really excited. We want to share it with you guys. You know, we're really supportive of the LGBTQ community. On Laura Kane after Dark and he's helping house and insecure lgbt Q youth at the lgbt Center here in San Diego. So he's putting together bags of emergency supplies like toothpaste, soap, sanitary pats, and socks. And I really like the fact that he wants to

For and again doing Laura Can't after Dark dot com. You can read more about it and the link is on there.

Too, right yeap. And we have great listeners in the Where is so the.

Best, the best, the best? Okay, Oh, I don't. I think I raised the psychic music, but I wanted to talk to you about the second thing she said to me. We had like a second conversation because I'm talking about Uh. We have Natalie Vail on the show frequently. She is a medium, she is a psychic to the core. She has like the biggest personality. She's great, we love her.

It was like basically a dad joke.

Yeah, and I know how you love.

Those anyway, she said, Lucky things are happening, lots of different things by chance, she said, like like I might my career might take a path where, for example, I'm sitting next to somebody on an airplane and he happens to be like the president of Fox TV and like he likes me or something like something weird like that is going to happen. She said, like so I happenstance and I was like, like, likes you, like I want to wake up with you in my bed, Like no, no,

Well, no, I'm not sure, Like is it going to be one of those like where you have to stand in front of him and pull your skirt up so you can see your legs and your vagina or oh, oh my god, one of those situations.

Oh geez. Okay that's all. That's all I'm gonna say about it. But anyway, if you want more informations, dms at Loura Canford Dark and I'll give you her number. And she's two dollars a minute and she's.

Great, what I'm only a dollar a minute?

Yeah? Okay, what would you tell somebody? Would you tell me you would read my cards in my numerology? Oh? For sure? Okay, what is what's happening in my life? Well?

I could do this real quick, Laura. You pulled the seven of Swords. Okay, you are going to find a lot of swords in your near future, too many swords, like skin colored swords, like seven swords. Okay, that's not I was thinking. I would avoid antique shops or sword shops because you don't need seven swords.

We'll just call you the swords swallower. Okay, oh no, me and him are totally wow. Your mind went totally different.

I was talking about literal swords.

Sorry, wow, oops, killered swords.

I just got the funniest visual I can't get out of my head.

I'm a bunch of seven meats, like flopping around in your face. God, everybody's sword fighting.

It's a duel.

That's what I'm picturing right now, seven of them on guard.

Now that's just like a normal Saturday night.

Jesus, Oh my.

God, see this is we cannot go down this.

Because a really deep shade of red right now kissing you well, actually.

So bad. Oh, not take this down any further, do not, you must not. Oh my god. Okay, dude, cue the random news music. Please. Okay, now, I know what you guys are gonna say, but oh my god, this kind of was I thought alarming. In a New a New Pole, people were asked do you wash your feet in the shower? Yes? Thirty seven percent of people said nope, I just let the water run over my feet and the soap and they're clean.

No, you got to get in between your toes and your digits and ugh, exactly, I know, Oh god, gross, I know you already know. I have a thing about feet.

Anyway, so I washed, not underneath it.

Okay, so scrabble, do you mean to tell me that like people that walk around barefoot? There's a handful of them.

Hey man, the water is running over my feet. It's clean in my feet. I don't need to do what must say.

I don't think it's the worst thing, but it's not good.

It's definitely not good.

Okay, I bet there's I bet thirty seven percent of those people don't describe their butttholes either.

Why did you need to go there?

That's just as disgusting. It's really like that hole needs to be showroom new, huh for some of us. Good stop listen that that all these holes are showroom new. Stop Like if I'm I'm gargling with mouthwash, that that holes clean, that holes clean.

You know what at this point in the show, stand up and turn around.

No, I can't. You know why?

Why?

Because I'm sweating so bad that it's just going to be a huge stain.

Well, there's something, Oh my gosh, come, I want to see how bad you're sweating. Why are your sweating?

Well? Look, am I sweating?

Let me see?

No?

No, no, I don't see anything. No, I'm not I swear I don't see anything. Okay, so bend down a little bit more. Okay, Wow, people are laughing behind your back. You don't care? What when people are really laughing behind your back? You're like, you don't care about that. I can't.

By the way, I can't tell that he's not wearing underwear by the atomic weggie he's got in his jeans.

I'm not wearing underwear.

Are you do?

I have a wedgie a little bit?

Can you put up like a little skull and crossbones over that?

Wait? Explain a man wedgie?

I don't know. It was just jeans were up my butt.

A little bit. Yeah, god's I was like, I was like, well, that's where the crack is.

So there's no fabric there carrying every everybody's seen my crack now.

Oh my god. Okay, So Scrabble the Official Scrabble Dictionaries adding a bunch of new words. Okay, now, I have a very big problem with this first word because it's not new. My son used it all the time when he was in high school. The word is yeat god, meaning to throw or express excitement.

That's a stupid word.

That is a dumb word.

I do remember when that entered the lexicon. So yeah, that's still relatively new. Scrabble is a pretty prestigious dictionary.

So I feel like heat's been around a while.

Well yeah, I mean a ton of years.

Yeah, backne has been added. That's fair acne like acne on your back.

How do you spell that?

Just a C K A c n e nope, b A c k any nope, b A c any.

Yes, I feel like missing a K is weird.

There, it looks weird.

It'd be weird to have it too.

Though I know it would be weird, but it looks really weird.

I don't think that should be in the didiction.

Looks like the cane does.

Bougie has been added.

That's good. Now try to spell that eric b O U j E E.

Good? Yes? What about well? Flof that's easy? What flo? It's slang for a furry animal. I don't know, I've never heard it.

That's a millennial term, so like elvis is a fluof gues?

Well, okay, so they're adding stan stan.

Yeah, you're a fan of something like song huh, that's where it came from.

Stan the man's name Stanley.

If you're a fan of something, you can say like, oh, I stand that, I'm such a stand I.

Have never heard of any of these except for oh my.

Gosh, Stan. Yeah, that's been around four while to any who has also been.

Added God could a No, that's not a word.

Sure could have and gramble gramble worthy of being posted on Instagram.

Oh I've never heard of I could.

Have got a gramma bley. Yes.

Great.

Did you hear that the Poltergeist House is Yes?

I saw that.

Now realistically it's on sale for one point one seven million. I remember it being like in a nice area, in a nice and it was a nice house. Would you or would you be? Is there any kind of conspiracy or weirdness related to the backstory of that film at all?

They all died, there was a curse. Yes, so the little girl that played Carol Anne died like shockingly, yeah, with flu stomach thing. The son died, and then that the oldest daughter was murdered by her boyfriend. Remember that?

Yes, yes, yes, okay, yeah, there's like something going on. Who did did Steve Stevens Bielberg din't.

Do Polter g Yeah he directed?

He did.

I love that movie.

I forgot great movie. It's an awesome movie. Oh my god.

Yeah. Dominique Dunn was the oldest daughter and she was the one that was murdered. And then I forget what the little girl that played Caroline, what her name was? She lived in Lakeside? She did, did she?

Yeah?

Yeah, that's the only interesting thing from out Lakeside.

Okay, Oh okay, send all your emails, all your dot producer Brian please.

Oh I'm sorry. It was directed by Tobe Hooper, The story was by Stevens.

The story was by he produced it. Okay, okay, well he produced it.

Okay, okay. First spanks, Now sneaks. Have you heard of these? No? Okay, so I want to The founder of Spanx has a new shoe called Sneaks.

I already don't like it.

It's a pair of high heeled sneakers.

Absolutely not. Don't even think about getting a pair.

The prices are high, between four hundred and six hundred dollars.

That is the dumbest thing I've ever heard. God damn it. That is so stupid.

Well, jeez, okay, here are some names that will never ever be popular again.

My name better not be on there.

Your name is not on here. Prudence, Prudence, Prudence, Gary. Can you imagine naming a baby Gary? This is everybody. I want you to see my new baby. His name is Gary.

That's cute.

No, I want to have another baby, I feel.

Let me go get your eggs.

That's an old man's name.

Let me go get your let me go get your egg kleidus.

No one's ever going to be named Phyllis Lance. Why because Lance?

I don't think Lances.

Alexa. Oh my god, I just went off Bertha.

Oh that's awful.

Bartholomew, I like that.

You know what your tea has been watching Signs of a Psychopath, impact wrestling, the Fairly Odd Parents.

That's not me.

I'm sure all the impact wrestling, much wrestling.

I don't know why that's on there.

Shocking amount of that?

What you pleasure yourself too on Saturday evenings.

Then when she's done wrestling, she goes to Fairly Odd Parents of Saturdays with signs.

She finishes off, Oh my god, she finishes off with ninety days.

Wait her search was oh my god, this one.

What no, oh, because that's what she heard me say. Oh yeah, that's what she just heard me say.

Naturally, she pulled up three times.

I'm surprised, like big Boner's wasn't on there or something she says.

Anyway, isis okay? Many Fanny, Fanny, Karen. He's gonna name maybe Karen. Well, no, because of that, because now it has a bad connotation, not the good karens. We love our good Karen.

We love our Karen. Horace Horace.

Yeah, that's a weird one.

Oh I had an uncle Horace, you did.

I feel like if uncle doesn't come before it, the name is really out of place.

Though, totally this one I could see like a celebrity naming their kid this Errol e r R. Yeah.

I think that's a cool one.

I think it's eight all. I mean, come on, ebeneezer, oh Jesus. And then gay for women or for a guy.

I've never met someone name either except does it meet the parents? His name is gay Lord Foker.

Oh yeah, gay Lord.

I think I knew a gay did I know?

Okay, of course you know a gay. I sit with you every Monday.

Oh no, it was a guy. His name was guy.

Okay, now I've done a couple of guys that is also a funny name.

I know, Kermit is on ear?

Oh jeez?

And uh Elmo?

Who was Yeah? Was anyone named Elmo before? Oh?

I was gonna say that.

Oh, and this is not you can change this around. You can change this around. But according to a new survey, the average person knows if their day has been ruined by eight thirty six am.

I'm half I'm not awake by that.

So that is the dumbest thing I've ever heard.

So uh, and we have four bad days a month, which is forty eight bad days a year.

No bad days, right, no bad month and a half and get out of the way for how long?

Like the whole year? Like a month?

Yeah, for a month and a half. I have bad, are bad, and the rest of the year is great.

Ooh, I don't know if I could do that every day for a month?

Bad bad, bad bad Get done?

No, see not for me. Okay, now cue the question gave music. I'm gonna throw a few questions at you. It's been a while, it's.

Been a while.

The heck is this music? You have the strangest taste of music.

It's it's hard to find music that's not copyrighted, and some of this stuff ends up being that okay, which is annoying. So I'm doing the best I can do. Better, Laura, better, Okay. If you were given twenty four hours to live like a celebrity, what is the first thing you would do?

Send my assistant to go grocery shopping.

If I could have twenty four hours to live like a celebrity, I would negotiate a contract where I'd make just tons and tons of money.

It's smart.

I would say something outrageous on Twitter or something.

Oh that's good too. I was going to say, I just I would just want to be on set something really outrageous, like on the set of like a really big movie. S fun. What are you doing? What are you doing? What are you doing?

So I have the perfect backgrab music and you won't have.

To you know better than this? What it better not be what I think it is. It's not and it's is it poop? You can't play poop. We can't play poop sounds. It's so gross.

It's not poop.

That's okay.

I hate you, I hate you, Okay.

What was the point of that just to make her do that. So it has been ugly derailed so many times or a liar.

No, I said it wasn't poop, that was I said.

First thing. I said it was better not be throw up.

Oh no, I didn't you say that.

Oh yeah right, Oh my god. All right. If you could be the best in the world at one hobby or activity, what would it be the best in the world at anything? M hm. The first thing that comes to my mind. I would love to be the world's best.

Jesus God every ten seconds.

He is oh he's on, Oh my god, singer.

I'd be the best singer ever. How much money you can make it that, I know?

Right, Like I was gonna say, I would love to be the best female violinist the world. Does ever know?

Maybe you won't make that much money.

I will all the appearances and endorsement, so you.

Can't as much as you think.

I'd like to be the best vocal artist voiceover.

Oh like what do you mean voice actor?

Yeah?

Really, like like for a movie you that'd be fun to do the movie once the movie trailers.

Yeah, just imagine like Gummings.

Yes, oh okay.

September ninth, Yes, twenty.

Five or that guy that the one guy that does the wrestling. You're not allowed to say it. Yeah, like he trademarked that. That guy has a great voice for that. Anyway, I think he's dead now, is he?

Well, now it's my chance step right in.

Okay, if you had a week oh wait wait did everybody answer? Yeah? If you had a week to survive in the wild, bit you could only bring three items. What would you take a week in the wild to survive? Three items?

A stun gun? Food?

You've got to be more specific than that sunscreen.

That is the stupidest thing. You die so fast.

He eat all the food in one day?

No a week? A week supply of food?

No, No, you can't do that.

Why says anything?

Okay, I'm going I would bring a fire starter, a tarp, and a survival hatchet.

No, a stun gun.

Why would you bring a stunt gun?

Because I wouldn't want to kill an animal?

What's it going to do?

Okay?

If a bear comes at you a stun guns doing jack crap?

Yeah that bear it's not feeling that at all.

Yeah, and you're a chance of you hitting something else it's so low.

Well, if I got them right, in the nuts, it'd be Okay, they're not like real gun, you know, like they're not like they don't shoot bullets. They shoot like a little prongs. They're super inaccurate, like a taser. Yeah, I could take a bear down with that.

No, not bring a stun gun. Be smarter than that. Okay, Laura, you go like like a lighter, a fire starter. I mean you got you gotta have fire food.

Yes, when I bring sandwiches.

No, that's not going to keep you alive, all right, jesus this okay, Okay, I don't pick.

I don't cut things that.

Okay. If you were offered the chance to live forever, but you have to pick one age to be forever, what age would you choose?

Trying to way like either somewhere between twenty eight and thirty two, young enough to like still be young, but old enough to also be like.

Old. Yeah, I'd probably be like thirty five.

Okay, I this is gonna sound like I am woman to hear me roar it's not ready.

I would pick right now because this is when I'm at my most powerful.

Shut up. I wasn't gonna say that. I was gonna say I really like the age that I am.

Now, Oh my god, that's exactly what you're guys say.

But not because that geez, it's just because, like I'm telling you, I'm not lying, thirties are hard. I remember my thirties were not.

Yeah, you had a unique set of thirties. We're not talking. You have to relive that over and over again. That's just the age your like body will be.

No usually like well, in your thirties, that's when you're raising your small kids. Like, having small kids is so freaking out.

You're not gonna You're not gonna be raising small kids in eternity. This is just the age you want to be as you live forever. This is solely about like looks and how you feel based on well, I like how I feel, right, look look at me and say that again.

I like the wisdom that I've gained.

You're not, Laura.

You don't get the question. It's just your body's age. Nothing to do with your brain.

I think it is.

She's not grasping. Good question.

No, I can't wrap my mind around it.

Yeah, literally, this is insane.

Next question my same age, damn it. And I could kick and stretch.

So then for the rest, for the rest of eternity. You're gonna your bones are gonna crack everything.

That's perfect because because Laura wants to be the age she's at now, so she can kick it.

You can stretch, she could kick because she's sixty six. Yet, jeez, Louise, stop doing that. I'm not kidding. Very angry at you. I'm going to stop at this question that we're done.

No, yes, we want to keep going, Brian and I want to keep No comment, no no comment. I didn't you look at me?

Say no?

I didn't. I want you to. I want you to splex some muscle over here.

No comment.

Oh my god, Brian loves me.

I am not taking sides on this, okay, because it's both been difficult.

I don't very.

I have been a delight.

You've been scary. You've been very scary and like very boddler for real.

Finally Erickson his midlife crisis era.

Oh god, no idea, listen.

You No comment, no comment, no comment.

I just did comments. I made a comment.

If you could be invisible one day, what would be the first thing that you do?

Fingerbang? Everyone Jesus, that.

Dumb Stop trying to be as naughty as possible.

That's a crime. That's literally a crime.

I you know what, Okay, we've never edited this podcast, like, we've never edited out any video or sound that I'm going to chop this video. I'm gonna chop that part out because that was so dumb. I'm going to figure it out before it goes to YouTube or whatever, and I'm cutting it out the sound too. That's how dumb that was. That was hilarious, stupid, Brian. What about you?

If you could be invisible, I would sneak in somewhere I'm not supposed to be and not do anything criminal, but just be there. I'm not talking about like ladies' locker rooms. But I don't know.

Maybe I'm gonna have to Yeah, I'm gonna have to redo that because violating someone's orifice is probably.

That's what I said, it's a crime.

Okay, So just ask me the question again.

Oh my god, if you were invisible for one day, what is the first thing that you'd do. I do the same thing as you, Brian. I think I would go I didn't think the Pentagon, but I was thinking more like where I work and like to the general manager's office and just see what they talk about. Like behind the scenes and stuff.

I'd go into the White House, maybe i'd steel stuff, oh yeah, or the Oval office.

That would be so I feel like they'd still be able to like like what if you like, can they still see your body heat or something? Well, no, we'd get like look at predator, He's invisible, but you could still.

See no see not not in this game? Are we're advanced?

Okay? So are we just literally like incorporeal? We don't even exist? People walk through us.

I didn't.

I don't even know what he just said.

Corporeal Wow, okay, corporeal being real? Incorporeal be like not real?

How have I never heard this word in mind?

Ghost's because he's sixty years old.

No, this is a common word, like ghosts are incorporeal. They do not have a physical I don't even know what that.

Okay, do you know how many ghost shows I've watched in my lifetime? I've never heard that, never heard never Wow. That's that's impressive.

I like, I like words like that, not possessing a physical body.

Wow. So yes, the answer is yes.

She also likes the word bocky.

All right, No, this is this is done. This is now done.

Good night, everybody.

Thank you so much for listening. I apologize deeply for even tiptoeing and causing us to fall into the whole you started week and love your podcast. Please I beg of you. I beg of you. If you love me at all, know what?

Please no, it's been a million years.

Please do this for hours. Please.

I love you so much.

If you did, you would you would end this?

I love you. Please give me a little kiss on the cheek.

I feel like I'm watching a crime here.

Love your podcast.

I love you, mar sweet babies. I'm sorry. I