Send us a Positive Review! In this episode Valerie interviews former BYU professor and current lover of people, education, music, truth, and personal integrity. In this conversation, Jason shares his journey from his teen years as a convert to the LDS church, through years of rewarding orthodoxy (box checking like the best of them) that led him to a position at BYU. His faith expansion journey began during those tenuous weeks when the university temporarily allowed LGBTQ students protection for ...
Nov 28, 2022•1 hr 12 min
Send us a Positive Review! Series Title: 2022 Strength of Youth Pamphlet Health Check [Part VII of VII] This episode rounds out the complete analysis of the 2022 Strength of Youth Pamphlet AND explores the wisdom of the great thinker and theologian Francis Menlove's writings, proposing that unity of doctrine is greatly overrated in this [and every] church and that the idea of needing to have a set standard of beliefs [aka: documents such as the For the Strength of the Youth Pamphlet] represents ...
Nov 25, 2022•1 hr 6 min
Send us a Positive Review! Series Title: 2022 Strength of Youth Pamphlet Health Check [Part VI of VII] Join Val and Nathan in this deep dive into the Church's current positions on the human body, sexual thought, speech, expression, and relationship, the Word of Wisdom, tattoos, piercings, grooming issues, and a word to those who have been abused in any way. Main points discussed include conversations about the following Our bodies are created in "their" image, male and female How our body's as t...
Nov 21, 2022•1 hr 18 min
Send us a Positive Review! Series Title: 2022 Strength of Youth Pamphlet Health Check [Part V of VII] In this episode Val and Nathan break down the section "Walk in God's Light", a section of the manual used to offer direction on issues such as media use, word of wisdom, and issues around the use of pornography. They love the guidance to cultivate our own offspring-of-God abilities to discern what brings us closer to our potential and what gets in the way and a focus on how the spirit is availab...
Nov 18, 2022•1 hr 13 min
Send us a Positive Review! Series Title: 2022 Strength of Youth Pamphlet Health Check [Part III of VII] In this episode Valerie and Nathan tackle the "For the Strength of Youth" section titled "Love God, Love Your Neighbor". This section starts off strong reminding us of love as the power that evokes more love and the most important force for growth and change. Another "win" is the reassurance that God's love is always available. It also invites us to love of all the world: a beautiful global ne...
Nov 14, 2022•46 min
Send us a Positive Review! Series Title: Analysis of E. Corbitt: Christ-Centered Activism [Part II of II] In this follow up episode, Valerie conceptualizes the recent formal criticism of activism/advocacy against the LDS church from the psychological framework called Internal Family Systems [IFS]. She begins by explaining how within each individual is a “true self” who is whole, complete, wise, and infinitely capable and powerful…[exactly what might be expected of offspring of divine parents!] A...
Nov 11, 2022•35 min
Send us a Positive Review! Series Title: Analysis of E. Corbitt: Christ-Centered Activism [Part I of II] In this special episode, Nathan and Val respond to the recent address given by E. Corbitt claiming that all activism against the church is sinful, wrong, and motivated by evil intention. This could not be further from the truth. Val and Nathan address the following issues looking at the psychology of how to heal fractured relationship and the many ways healthy healing principles were not only...
Nov 07, 2022•1 hr 26 min
Send us a Positive Review! In this episode Valerie walks you through her own experience with many, many of her own clients who tenaciously refuse to believe that the atonement is actually infinite and eternal for them. In the LDS faith (and other conservative Christian faiths) sexual addiction seems to hold an elevated place of shame, judgment, and condemnation. Many people communicate and truly believe that this struggle is too "bad" to be consumed in the atonement of Jesus Christ...until the w...
Nov 04, 2022•31 min
Send us a Positive Review! Series: 2022 Strength of Youth Health Check [Part III of VII] In this episode Val and Nathan focus on the section in the pamphlet that outlines the LDS church’s teachings on the atonement of Jesus Christ and riff about some positives in this section as well as what they feel might be a generalized misunderstanding about the nature of Christ’s truly infinite power to heal us through love. They start with Val breaking down 3 atonement theories: Ransom Theory Satisfaction...
Oct 31, 2022•54 min
Send us a Positive Review! Due to the large number of enquiries I have received about joining a space-limited support group, this short episode will answer some of the common questions that many of you have about what to expect in a Latter Day Struggles Support Group. I address and give examples of kinds of conversations we have, kinds of content I bring, what type of participation you might expect to have, and how well you will get to know yourself and each other. I divide my focus between imme...
Oct 31, 2022•26 min
Send us a Positive Review! Series Title: 2022 Strength of Youth Pamphlet Health Check [Part II of VII] In this episode tackling the fresh new For the Strength of the Youth Pamphlet, Val and Nathan cover the first several sections of this pamphlet and on the bright side are encouraged by opening words about the lovability of our youth and how normal it is to struggle in life. They also notice the first presidency's pointing our youth to our Savior in times of struggle and stress. On the more conc...
Oct 28, 2022•38 min
Send us a Positive Review! Series Title: 2022 Strength of Youth Pamphlet Health Check [Part I of VII] Join Nathan and Val in this walk down "For the Strength of the Youth" memory lane. Beginning with the first rendition in the 60's and its humorous fixation on proper fashion to the focus on measuring up to God of the 1990's pamphlet and anxiety inducing do's and don'ts lists of the 2011 pamphlet...there is plenty to compare and contrast about how this official position statement has change and c...
Oct 24, 2022•35 min
Send us a Positive Review! Join Valerie and Nathan as they break down the Young Women's and Young Men's Themes from the perspective of healthy identity development as children of divine parents, each with a unique identity and purpose in this life. Val and Nathan celebrate the 'wins' in each document and then describe why certain elements of each document might be problematic for the healthy development of youth of both genders and for different reasons. Sometimes documents of this nature that d...
Oct 21, 2022•45 min
Send us a Positive Review! In this episode Valerie validates those who are struggling with some current policies that are wounding our sexual and gender minority friends and loved ones and invites a deeper understanding of both the hurt and our potential to heal this hurt by looking at Carol Lynn Pearson's book "No More Goodbyes". In this episode Val breaks down what she considers to be five foundational healthy psychological relationship paradigms and contrasts these with five unhealthy paradig...
Oct 17, 2022•1 hr 20 min
Send us a Positive Review! In this episode Valerie talks to those of you out there whose faith and trust crises are at least in part due to issues around the LDS church's doctrine, policies, and consequent treatment towards our sexual and gender minority friends and family members. This episode focuses especially on scientific findings that clearly explain that sexual orientation is not a choice and therefore cannot be condemned or changed. Valerie analyses Gregory Prince's info-packed lecture t...
Oct 14, 2022•1 hr 6 min
Send us a Positive Review! In this episode Valerie is interviewed by Kate Gregory, host of the growing podcast "In Her Image". The main subjects addressed is the strange but undeniable fear that many in the orthodoxy seem to experience in the very idea of a living real-time relationship with a feminine divine. Questions addressed include the following: Why is fear associated with a feminine divine? Why is there a connection between people seeking a feminine divine and their sometimes distancing ...
Oct 10, 2022•48 min
Send us a Positive Review! Series Title: Faith Crisis Report [Part V of V] In this closing episode of this information-packed series, Valerie and Nathan walk through the final portion of the LDS Faith Crisis Report and share the research team's formal insights, their recommended strategies, and specific tactics to help heal our suffering members in crisis. These findings fall into five categories as follows: Close the history gap. Console Individuals in faith crisis Support families in faith cri...
Oct 07, 2022•35 min
Send us a Positive Review! Series Title: Faith Crisis Report [Part IV of V] In this episode Nathan and Valerie break down what the researchers call the “Perpetual Cycle of Disaffection”, the typical and predictable emotional experience of one who experiences the LDS faith crisis. The 8 stages are as follows: Initiation Search Troubling Discovery Betrayal Harsh Treatment Distancing Anger Magnification, and Disaffection Val and Nathan highlight how this painful experience is tragic in part because...
Oct 03, 2022•37 min
Send us a Positive Review! Series Title: Faith Crisis Report [Part III of V] Join Valerie and Nathan breaking down the fascinating research done by a team of experts who wanted to help the general authorities of the LDS church better understand what is REALLY going on amongst thousands of people in faith and trust crises in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. In this episode Valerie and Nathan break down what this research team found to be the typical trajectory of the crisis that s...
Sep 30, 2022•44 min
Send us a Positive Review! Series Title: Faith Crisis Report [Part II of V] In this content-packed episode, Val and Nathan go deeper into the LDS Faith Crisis Report, breaking down and analyzing a LOT of information discovered by the team of researchers trying to help the brethren at church headquarters better understand the nature of the problems we as a church are having. Covered in this episode: 1. The Researcher's objectives Faith crisis defined Researchers analysis around why a focus on fai...
Sep 26, 2022•48 min
Send us a Positive Review! Series Title: Faith Crisis Report [Part I of V] In this episode Valerie sets the stage for a detailed analysis of a report compiled by a team of highly talented Latter Day Saint scholars in various professional fields endeavoring to help the General Authorities of the Church better understand the nature of the current suffering of so many multi-generational LDS church members in faith and trust crises. This episode is the first of a five part series that will go deeply...
Sep 23, 2022•27 min
Send us a Positive Review! In this episode Valerie addresses a listener's request to address her faith crisis grief from a psychological perspective. Valerie uses this episode as an opportunity to talk about her own grief process both preceding her decision to start this podcast as well as her ongoing experience working through the grief that comes when our worlds are turned upside-down by faith and trust crisis. She shares 10 specific points regarding your grief as you valiantly struggle with y...
Sep 19, 2022•54 min
Send us a Positive Review! Join Nathan and Valerie as they tackle another listener question. In this episode they address that haunting and refusing-to-die statement about how the prophet will never lead the church astray. Many of us in our orthodox days took this as a given and simply applied the blinders when something didn't feel congruent with this. Now it is time to take a look at where that statement came from, some context about why it was said, and some thoughts regarding "prophethood" a...
Sep 16, 2022•32 min
Send us a Positive Review! In this episode Valerie and guest co-host and fellow relationship therapist Brannon Patrick talk about the goodness and badness that happens at the hands of well-meaning but not-professionally trained bishops in a system where they are often expected [and endeavor] to run a three ring circus in their office consisting of marriage counseling, trauma recovery, addiction counseling, grief work, and complex mental health issues. And mind you these bishops are often your av...
Sep 12, 2022•35 min
Send us a Positive Review! In this episode Valerie and Nathan tackle an excellent and challenging question from one of you listeners regarding how to handle their child's upcoming 8th birthday and eligibility to be baptized into the LDS church. Many parents feel positively confused...wanting to integrate the "good stuff" of this faith tradition into their homes and family life while also wanting to be cautious about how, what, and when to teach their children in ways that reflect their own newly...
Sep 09, 2022•32 min
Send us a Positive Review! In this episode Valerie walks you through a historic tragedy to demonstrate what happens when a community is trained to obey authority over honoring common sense, conscience, and sound judgment. Valerie takes you back to the 1970s and recounts LDS church headquarter's handling of the national Equal Rights Amendment [ERA] and how large numbers of church members gladly relinquished their own wisdom and judgement in the service of loyalty to the institution. After tracing...
Sep 05, 2022•46 min
Send us a Positive Review! In this episode Nathan and Valerie break down some research called the "Systems Justification Theory" that shines a light on why most people choose the status quo over the hard work of challenging the systems we know need reformation. The theory highlights four key reasons why we cling to status quo: We feel reassured by the familiarity of our own institutional mess and will suffer in silence before deciding to manage the discomfort of pushing back In the face of outsi...
Sep 02, 2022•27 min
Send us a Positive Review! Series Title: Diagnosing Spiritual Abuse [Part III of III] Nathan and Valerie break down 3 more indicators of a system (church or family) that is struggling on some level with spiritual abuse. The scholarship used in this episode comes from non-Latter-Day Saint researchers looking at religious systems in general and pointing out specific features of the churches that tend to perpetuate the most unrighteous dominion. The 3 points that they cover in this episode are as f...
Aug 30, 2022•48 min
Send us a Positive Review! Series Title: Diagnosing Spiritual Abuse [Part II of III] Nathan and Valerie break down 3 more indicators of a system (church or family) that is struggling on some level with spiritual abuse. The scholarship used in this episode comes from non-Latter-Day Saint researchers looking at religious systems in general and pointing out specific features of the churches that tend to perpetuate the most unrighteous dominion. The 3 points that they cover in this episode are as fo...
Aug 26, 2022•30 min
Send us a Positive Review! Series Title: Diagnosing Spiritual Abuse [Part I of III] Nathan and Valerie break down 9 consistent markers of spiritually abusive systems [family or churches]. The scholarship used in this episode comes from non-Latter-Day- Saint researchers looking at religious systems in general and pointing out the specific features of the churches that tend to perpetuate the most unrighteous dominion. The 3 points that they cover in this episode are as follows: Heavy emphasis on c...
Aug 22, 2022•37 min
