"Seek Treatment!" (w/ Pat Regan)

to you guys. We even got up to I think number sixty one. We got up to number fifty nine. We crossed us top sixty, the top sixty girls, Oh my goodness. Well, I mean we have HPJ to thing for that. And everyone at home who has been rating reviewing. I was just telling these guys we are here with Pat Regan, Say hi Pat Hi, guys hi um. I was just sharing with them that I humiliatingly will grab people's phones and you know, I'll do this five star

review thing. Have you done this? I've done the same with my father's and have you have you been doing this? I took my straight wife's phone and gave a five star review and it saved our marriage. And that's just what works for our family. That's amazing. Whatever works for your family, and you know you can dictate whatever it's gonna work for your family when you do this. I mean it works for Joe's family to uh just go into iPhone stores and um, you know the iPhone stores.

So please help us keep making Project chart operation a resounding success and we'll see you on the reviews. Look man, oh, I see you. Wow, and look over there, how is that larger? Yes? Goodness, Dan dong Loss Culture Rista's calling, and I would say that we are bravely starting two thousand eighteen. Bravely we are recording this on January one. Wow. Rabbit rabbit, rabbit, rabbit, rabbit, rabbit rabbit. Yeah. I mean, wait,

what what do you mean by rabbit? Well, people say rabbit rabbit at the first day of every month too. I never could love anyone ever said that. It's a very sort of like folk see thing that people do. Apparently I just learned about this this year because someone would just out of nowhere text me rabbit rabbit every month every now, like what what? And then I would realize slowly with down on me, it was the first

of the month. That's insane when you when you discover a phrase that's popular and well known and you literally have never heard of it in your right I can't think of one from me right now? What was your response just now? When I just said rabbit rabbits? I was like, literally, I've never heard that in my life. And you know what else, there's a person that I heard about who everyone else knows about and I had never heard of in my life until this year, Connor

o Burst. I didn't know who the funk that was out doesn't know who? Then that is open for Casey Thats Graves one time when I saw her in concerts. Okay, well, if he had come out there and I had been at that concert, you know what I would have said, who is that? Do you want to know something? A lot of people were there for Connor. That's insane. And then they left when Casey went on, and I was like that disrespect is so disrespectful. Number nine, when people people,

when people leave, they are not having respect. In terms of concerts, that's a that rule is a little bit. It's a journey to get there. No, no, no, I think we just have to say it again. Okay, when people leave before the headliner, I have some respect in terms of concerts. There we go. That's all. It takes every now and then to really cement the permanence of a rule of culture. Can I say something, I've been really excited about this guest because there's there's guests, and

then there's this guess. There's there are guests, and then there's a guest that really has worked his or her or their way into the mythology of what we do here and become really this true star. In fact, famously you suggested perhaps they should become permanent, and I and I really truly in passing, I thought, wow, what are

some interesting things to do with the show. And I don't really want to get into this right now because you know, no no, no no no no. I just I want that I want us to focus on the guest and not about what I said about the guest. Unit does that make sense? I do? I do? I get that. Famously, our guest the three time and only winner of the Lost Cultural restis Icon Award. It's fascinating. That's the way it chuck out like we did Coach War. And I said, probably like I mean it will be

crazy if Pat one. We all knew pat would win, but then Pat one, and then we had to honor that second win at I don't think so, honey, right? And who could forget when it came out in the mist in the mist and there's a beautiful Mindy Tucker photo of him in the mist that he might be using for promotional purposes for a credit. Yeah, and of

course we say shout out to Mindy um. But yes, and this is actually really fascinating and upsetting that he has a credit because it breaks the whole sort of his own mythos, right, I mean he he is, of course New York City's most beloved comedian with zero credits

or projects. Um. Of course, famously um the credits prior to this act true credit was they included, Um, one time his mom's friend met Colin Quinn on the beach and told him that he had comedy, and one time a Swedish woman approached him and told him that he

would do well in Europe sexually. And who could forget the fact that his cousin who's a teen, owns a vest that was featured in an episode of Ryan Murphy's screen queens or who could forget the fact that he was blacklisted from the third installment of My show Live on broad Day. And we have breaking news. Um, after a short hiatus from Lloyd Knight, he has left Lloyd Knight for good. We can now report that our guests

has finally left Lloyd Knight for good. He is on to other opportunities, perhaps even paid, perhaps maybe even getting twenty bucks from doing a set somewhere. That's huge. Oh yeah, that is that that people need to understand that in New York City, that is rare. When you find your venmoll and there's twenty bucks in there after doing a set, It's like a Christmas morning. Absolutely. Now can we talk about the actual credit? The actual credit? I can don't

wait to be to see this. Maybe hooton and holleran, yes, you know, I'll be hooting and hollerand Matt what's the credit? Well, I'll tell you on Friday, January five at seven pm. But the doors open. It's thirty pm at the Duplex NYC in the West Village right on Seventh Avenue and I think West fourth. Okay, there will be Pat Reagan unwrapped and loving it with amazing uh featured guests as well, Aaron Jackson, Josh Sharp, Knew let me a pair again.

The list goes on Derek de Kats. Okay, all right, sorry, Well, now that he's spoken out of turn, we must introduce Pat Regan. I would never speak of turn on my own behalf, but when it comes to my openers, I'm a mama bear and I will always, always, always fight for them. Yes, you would identify as a Mama bear. I would identify as a Mama bear for my openers. Yeah, don't come from me, don't come from my family, don't come from my openers. So you identify as white gay,

identify as a white guy, and that is my minority. Um, my gay is a minority, you, My gay is a minority. And then do you identify as Mama bears? Is that a minority? Um, it's not a minority that as a marginalized people and in some spaces and in some spaces for sure, it's a minority. Absolutely. Okay, So, Pat, I think I'm going to get ahead of what you were trying to address just now after you're um really shocking cough. Now do you want to tell everybody what's going on? Yeah?

So a couple of different things have going on with me right now. I want to hear it as per usual, you know, um, we're all multi faceted here. And I want to also say, like I already said, it's off there, I want to reiterate on the air that my brain felt tired right now, so like I might start slow, but whatever, this is famously exactly and it's not by design, that's not contract. It's really my emotional truth right now

is that you feel tired. I feel my brain feels tired. Well, what kind of events did you get up to last night on New Year's Eve that would leave you in a tired state? I went to one party that was

like very ALTI gun comedy scene, absolutely it was. What was stressful about the party was I got their thirty five minutes after start time, which is safe, I think, and of course as the first person there, it was a really good party by everyone was like I knew people too, about to introduce myself, but not well enough to like just start chatting that horrible middle liminal space. And it's I, by necessity need to be like central to any group of people that I'm involved in. I

didn't feel like the star of the party. That's my anxiety got the best of me and I couldn't stop coughing. Yeah, and so the host actually gave me cold medicine, which is which is nice, that is um. So then I laughed. You didn't refuse the cold medicine out right, though, because that's what I would have done. I didn't refuse the cold medicine out right because I felt I might need it. And that's why they have it. That's why they have it. That's why they make it for people to take I

might have. It would be such a bad week for me to get a cold, because I'm interving for a job tomorrow or Wednesday, thank you. And I also have my on Friday, so it wouldn't be a big week. It's a big week. Um. Well, you could get up there and you could do the show a little sick. I could get up there a little sick, But my mom has been very sick in a way. I don't think my mom could do a show right now, how you know, I don't think she could if I get

the sickness that my mom has. Um aggressive cold. It's like, yeah, it's an aggressive code. It's like a voice affecting colde. So it seems like the cough is lingering because it's still sort of so. Also, another thing going on with me right now is that you just talked about this offer, but I want to again bring it in. It's it's, it's it would be important to share it on I have no problem saying something. Aways Um, I've been chewting

the correct gum. I've never smoked in my entire life a cigarette, and for reasons unbanous to me, I started chewing the correct gum and it makes me I'm gonna stop. But could this be because you are becoming addicted to the nicotine in the gun, Yes, I think so, Yeah, okay, alright, but but that's like that also makes me cough. But I the nicotine some I think so like when I when I chew, it might be a placebo. Maybe I don't know, but like maybe I shouldn't have brought that end.

But no, no, no, I'm glad you did, because no one happy you did that. That's quite a quirk totally, so that that I think is also a contributed I was never quite a quirk. I was about the cough. But if we're going to talk about the cough, like I want to really make sure I represent all factors, and you know what, I do want to apologize to you because I was the one who took the cough and brought it into this conversation. Absolutely, and I'm right now you're drinking tea. We all are, we all are.

This is this is a nice change of Can I tell you something, I actually can't stand when people are coughing. I can't stay when people are coughing. And literally I just told Bowen I famously can't watch The Crown because the first two episodes of The Crown are Lane Pierce Price, Land Price from mad Ment just coughing too much. And I said, I am not sitting here for that's this is just not what works for me and my family to sit there and watch the ground when I don't

want to watch people cough. It doesn't work for me and my family. Remember on my Green, I mean I r L It's like, okay, maybe that was like not scripted, but when it's when it's in the Netflix or Redge, I don't need to see it. But I haven't gotten into the crying up, but I wanted to because I'm very I'm famously very into the succession to the British are you. I'm very into it. It is anything where like humans are like quantified by like something silly. I like,

I really like, it's really excellent. I wrote it off pretty early on last last year when it came out and I was I watched the first two episodes there were such a snooze fast. I was like, Okay, this is not for me, like this sort of crusty, stupid, coughing sort of British sensibility. No, no, thank you. But then it really picks up as soon as I mean spoiler alert, King George the seventh passed away and so immediately Elizabeth must succeeded. It takes succession um and and

then the show just really picks up after that. But why not started there because you need the emotional The emotional context of Elizabeth and her relationship with her father is very important. So anyway, I don't know, I mean, I've never watched the show. I don't know, but you want to get into it, well, I love like, I'm very attractive to like I always know, like the top

ten to the Throne rattled them off right now. I might not know name is, but on no Charles so Charles, Well, yeah, um, George, Charlotte, Harry, Um, and then Charles, and then Edward I believe Charles's younger brother, and then Edwards two daughters Beatrice in Eugenie. Then the next Um Edwards. The next boy is Andrew, because George, because Charles is one of four, So then it's Andrew. Then and I think Andrew has a son and a daughter. And then it's the sister of Charles. I thought sister

was the oldest. I thought Anne was the oldest of those siblings. But because she's not a girl. If you were born like before something, then if you're a girl. So it goes to like Charles and his kids, and then next after Charles and his kids and a script supervisor who's like job is to figure this out there in the cast Like okay, guys, wait, actually seventh is Eugenie. So I mean in life, I would love that job. Yeah, someone comes in and it's just like, hey, actually this

is nothing. What are your thoughts on Megan? I love her. I love her on suits? Yeah, okay, wait, so she is like a legit actress. Do you watch suits? No? I know you famously watched watch very attractive men in suits. Yeah, wait that one. No, two guys, Oh, never mind, I'm thinking of I'm thinking of the guy from the Doctor Show. I'm thinking of the guy. His name is Mark Firstein. I think he's so hot Mark Firstein. If you're listening,

Matt thinks he's so hot, famously not Megan Marko. No, but I've watched suits with straight boys, and I'll tell you what they go gaga Overgan. Really, I thought you're gonna stay over the men. No, there's I mean the gates for Megan, of course, totally. But I mean, but I mean, you know when there's one of those girls that are like, oh yeah, she's like pretty, she's gorgeous, and but then there were like lots of other girls and then there's like certain ones that straight boys just love.

That Royal Pains. That's the shot I was thinking about Royal Pains. I just said Royal Pains and the headphones knocked off pats. He totally, though I don't have any experience of the Royal Pains except that, like, I don't respect that all right, So what's good about suits? Just the guys are hot or the storylines? So this is suits and I never ever wanted to be like on college talking about suits, But that's where you are. When you come into these doors, you have no idea what's

going to happen next. Yeah, so suits is like there's one hot lawyer, one hot like funk up. Um. You know, the hot funk up is really smart like he but he's like from the streets and so he I think used to make money like taking s a t s for people because he's so smart but such a funk

up and so hot. So then he likes running away from the cops or something, and he accidentally runs into hot lawyers like law firm who's interviewing new lawyers, and he sits down and he's just like so smart and hot that the older hot guys like weight, but he's such a bas such a funk up, and the older lawyers like, I could make something of you. So they like that makes a lot of sense narratively that he would take a chance on this like hot guy who's been the start of two hot white men taking a

cheer on another. Why is this stay special? Why is this stay special over the other days. So so then he ends up getting the job this law firm. They create this law that he went to Harvard Law and then it's kind of the politics of the firm, like who will find out that he's like not he's actually a funk up um and that young the young hot guy and Mega Markel who's apparentlelygal but like she's actually really smart too and capable of so much more. They

kind of have like a romance. So she's not only on the show, she's a big part of the show. She's a huge part of the show. That's insane. There's also this red haired woman on that show and I haven't seen it in years, and even when I saw it, it was just whenever we don't know their name. Jessica turns in a really fun for Mormons and suits. Yeah, it's she's it's almost like Joanie from mad Men, but like but like a little that feeling when you call

her Joan. Who then are you her best fucking friends? I haven't watched Diapers. Only one person calls her Joanie, and that is fucking Roger Sterling and he was sleeping with her totally famously, wasn't um, you weren't. But this redhead is like bucks some also not as Bucksum, but that's a high standard. Joanie is the most bucks them. Yeah, and she just like she's fun. But like so maybe she doesn't have red hair, maybe like maybe I'm conflating

the two, but but she's a fun. Part of she was fun and everyone is like really up early, like doing good work, like at their office, and there's something aspirational about watching it because you can tell they got their ship together. I thought this exact same thing about I was watching Aaron Brockovich two nights ago Humble Brag,

Thank You, Hombo Brag. There's so many scenes of just a character working, staying late at night at the office, and there's something aspirational about that too, and similar way of watching people getting to the office early and doing Wait, so I'm actually glad you actually just said okay, because I talked to I think to you about this a little bit. Lately. I've been thinking a lot about Julia. Okay, is it because of wonder that I don't know what it is? You know what? I know what it is.

I recently watched a Netflix Mona Lisa's smile for the first time. Thank you for that. Yes, thank you. Women can do anything, be a mom. If you're a white I have to tell you Jennifer Goodwins one of Jennifer Goodwin's first roles, one of Jennifer Goodwin's first roles, one of Maggie Jillenhall's first big part. And I'll tell you what. I never liked Maggie Jonehall. I never trusted her. I don't trust her still, Okay, because this is me. Katie

Holmes is fucking family, you know what I mean. And I think that when they replaced her, that was callous. In Batman and Maggie, it's a girl to me, like Maggie broke girl code and that was my That was my entrance into Maggie. Who who could have done that? Who could have filled in for Katie? It wasn't Katie's choice. I'm saying it wasn't. I am making this up, but I don't think it was. I remember feeling like it was.

Katie Holmes was going through that home moment Tom Cruise her stock and was like, we hate Katie, hate Katy. And I'm not here to defend Katie um, but what I will say is like she was that character and she's family, and I will we can't put her out to pasture. And so Maggie John I just always had a bad taste in my mouth. But I'm saying, like, you can't blame Maggie for that. For the Katie stuff. No,

but I think she could have refused the part. She could have said the Dark Night because Katie, I would I like to her family. I like to think that I would have. I like to think if I was Maggie Donald and they came to me and they said, listen, we're gonna we're gonna sunk over Katie Holmes, this young girl in the industry, you would have said, Katie, it's the top female role in this film. What do you think? So anyways, I just always was like, and then I

thought Maggie jo like fine. I was like, I don't know if I'm like getting something from Maggiejohnho that I couldn't have from Honestly, I think here's what I'll say. She was giving you a lot in spoiler aller for the Dark Knight, the scene where she gets, for lack of a better word, incinerated by the joker. Um, she was giving you some really good acting when she realized

that she was not going to live right. Um. And I don't And I think that Katie Holmes is about as talented as like, I don't know, like like one of the more talented birds in the world. She could probably do as much as like a penguin could on screen, Like she absolutely can come out there and be like, oh, that's cute, like and then what it's over? What do you think? I want to be really clear about my argument is not that Katie Holmes is talented, right, that

would never be my argument. That has a lot of cards to clarify that. My argument is that Katie Holmes is family. She had teaching, so she's her family because you you feel close because anyone like I didn't feel like Maggie donas family yet and he was a new person dount too well with you people like but so then I smell make her family. So last forward to end of the husand seventeen and like there's something I'm not just days ago and just isn't going when I

watched and I'm like, oh, wow, I love Maggie job. Honestly, can I tell you the scene that's the real gag because I didn't even get to say with the real gag of Mona Lisa smile is and this is actually indicative of a much larger problem, which is that no one ever gives Kirsten Dunts the credit, never gives she never gets the credit. And I was recently talking to someone about um Slene and how they thought that Shelene gave gave nothing in in big little lies, and I said, actually,

I don't think that's true. I just think she Lene makes it look easy. And I think Kirsten Dunns doesn't get the credit ever because she makes things look so easy, like you never think like, oh, that person is turning in an amazing performance, because you don't. It doesn't smell like acting. It's just good and the part like so. And she's also so malleable. She can do so many different things. You can associate her with so many different

kinds of performances and kinds of movies. So Mona Lisa Smile just floats on by and like the story of it is like Julia Roberts or whatever. But low Ki, Kirsten Dunst is killing it, especially the scene at the like towards the end of the movie there's two and and give me a hoot and a holler if you agree. Okay, okay, Having freshly seen the scene where she's like you and she's really talking about herself, and and it's someone that was like beating against the chest, like, yeah, that was

It's a great moment. And then that's funny. I was gonna come. I was gonna come for kirst anybody. You were done talking. But now that you've worked that scene and I'm remembering that, and now I'm going to twist the knife. The scene where she's on the bike following the car at the end, like looking into the car, Yeah, that was a right for me. She she's she There was the most lived in performance from her there for sure.

Julius the full site going that movie and I will go forgot she was in a bott and I forgot. She was like I think she has I think Julia Styles is like very like I think those who like love and those who don't love don't I love I love ten Things, one of my favorites. I love ten Things, Love Larissa Oli. Yeah, Larissa and ten Things really new the assignment. But Julia, So I watched Mono Lisa and I'm like, I'm just like having this moment with with

Julia Roberts. Julia Roberts not it's never never Jolie Styles. I'm having a moment with Julia Robert. I've never had it. I've never had a moment. Was doing. No, we just said ten things. But she didn't give you the moment. Yes she did. When she reads the poem, she is giving you the moment. Come on, Yes, that's actually real love culture number twenty two. When she reads the poem, Julia Styles is giving you a moment. Yes, that's true. She gives and she goes, you didn't Yes, I don't

hate you. I don't hate you. Run out of English class and speaking, and then we're gonna I'm gonna. Oh my god. And when she was mortified when he was singing that song on the bleachers, she was like, oh my god. She was truly a white Tominas militant plays played field hockey, didn't care about the core. Um, yeah, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, before we move on. She was not a painter. That was not not another team movie. And also she and that was of course um parodying

character and she saw that. But they did play with paint in that Yes, their meat cute like montage that it was paintball, but it was they throw border blooms filled with paint Can we be clear? So unclear what that fucking diversion was? Like, what the hell was that like? If they were trying to And I will say this, shame on that movie because they had an opportunity to bring a lot of tourists to whatever that was and it was not clear what it was. I know they

paddle boat there. They had to have a montage of them, a montage of them having fun. And they had to make a contemporary because it was a contemporary telling obtaining of the true and they had to make it modern, which at the time was paintballing throwing paintball right. Well, then Julia's styles will always take the shakespeareence um reimagining. Yeah, she'll always take that, even now that she's like I

feel done acting, Um, she like, oh right, oh? And also taming and then also she did Hamlet, a modern Hamlet. She played Ophelia on stage film on a film. I think I remember that. Never forgot who. Also, there's big names I haven't said. Okay, talking about your moment that she gave you? Why are you? Why are you? Why do you think? I don't want to say one lasting about ten things I hear about you? They may never

get to say again. Alison, Johnny turn and if I performance that was that was one of Alison Jenny's first like breakout movie role. It was the first time she took a small, nothing part and made it into a thing, which well, yeah, I know it was was quarters before that, yes, around the same time maybe, but it was like it was timed out in the right. It was building on all of that. So that's why I don't say about

Johnny and then um and then um. Okay, So Roberts, I've never a moment with her, and not only smell, but I thought, like the whole time, I was like, wow, like I'm enjoying Roberts right now. And then it also got me things like I don't even know Julia Roberts, you know what I mean, Like I feel like I don't know you know what I mean, Like you know the stars of today. I don't know Julie Roberts at all. And I've never seen Aaron Brock. But my end I

would love, you have to you would love. It's never not great to watch and it's very relevant now, shall I say these political times, because it's all about the difference that one person can make and so is Monoise. But I um, but my entrance to Julia and my favorite joy a moment, of course, has to be my best friend's wedding dance at the end of my favorite and most of I got moves you've never seen. No she's great in it, but she does. And here's the

thing about my best friend's wedding too. On paper and this is the mark of someone that's really great on paper. That character is so awful, like you can't like that person, like imagine Also it's kind of like this with l Woods. Imagine getting that script and being like, oh, and also we have to like her by it's like no way, so hard but like, but like there's something because just because so annoying, you know what I mean, so annoying, The motivations are so bizarre, right, yeah, and then to

turn it around and make it a thing. I think my best in Dudding is the best ever I do. Cat Me diaz Is and I famously said that the Camin diaz Is karaoke scene in that movie was an emotional tear jerker. I don't get that, but I still don't get I don't know. I don't want to get into it. My roommates. My roommate caught me watching her in Brockovich this weekend. There's shame around it. Well because

he was he was like, I tweeted about it. I was like last year and Brockovich viewing and then like later on the day, I was still watching it at home and he goes, didn't you already see this this today? And I was like, I didn't finish it. But he said that Julia Robert did not deserve the Oscar that year over Ellen Burston in rec Room for a Dream. Wait was but who was she in? Because that didn't

legendary actress who plays the mother? Okay that I watched that movie in college, and I'll say that woman really did a good job. But then she apparently she won the Oscar the next year. Ellen versus never want an I don't. I don't know that. I actually I have to bravely step out and say sorry. If you're like, okay, who is an oscar A? I actually consider myself among you. But I do not know if Ellen Burston as one aner and we have to look and I didn't even

know who Ellen Burston was. No, no, no no, she did win Best Yes in the eighties no, she won, Um she wanted in the seventies for what for Scor says the film Alice doesn't live here anymore, best doctress the Actually, we're going to be crucified for not knowing that. I think that we can get a pass on that from a seventies movie. I would forgive that. I would forgive that someone recently the first person someone said to me that, Um.

They were like, oh, like, loved your episode of cultural as Dust shout to the pachast wrong And I was like, oh, thank you get so hard like listening to something because you want to get you want to be in the conversation. I was like, oh, I know, like I identify with that emotionally absolutely. And they were like, especially when the

person keeps getting like facts wrong. And I was like, okay, that was definitely a reader on our podcast, Like I'm not saying everything, but I'm not specifically because I listened to when I was here before. I listened to that back and I said, like, lots and lots of wrong things. I said that, um, who's who's whose red hair? Despertus. Then Marcia crosses character and Rose places an alien, which is like that was truly a crazy thing she had. She had an alien like scar. Someone someone did come

for me. First miss misstating that Anne Hathaway's love interest in Devilwa's product was the guy from Rooney and that was actually yeah, that was the yes. And you know what, I just want to say, just to all the touristes out there who are listening, I hope thank you for saying this. We are not We are not the paragons of truth. We don't have fact checkers here. Okay, we do not have that luxury. We are just simply operating from a place of common and oftentimes incorrect cultural knowledge.

And that is the beauty of this podcast that everyone can access this. There's no you know, there's no barrier of entry here. So when you when you d m us on Instagram, be kind also a pat hold my hand across the table, because I have to tell you something, because I feel like that you identify with me in a certain way. This actually is kind of like a quote I lived by life by, which is I don't know my words, but I do know my heart, and

I feel that you don't know your words. I have no idea my words, but I know my heart like the back of my hand. Yeah, exactly. So if I'm ever getting something wrong, it's just that I don't know my words, but but I do know my heart. Like the words I'm saying are wrong, but I am truly Now that we had that moment, I feel like Bow and Yang he does know his words very well. You are a word queen. I don't know my heart. I know that's so. That's what's so. Yeah, it takes so

much longer to know your heart. That's actually really true. Can I ask you something? Okay, So, being a white gay that was growing up on Long Island, did you have a type which I feel like was forced upon us and forced fed to us gaze living on the island, which was the Tan Guido type man? And I still like subscribe to that. Not that I would like date

that man or not. Maybe I would not clothes minded if if you're out there listening, um, but yes, that well, I think that will always be like my first alright, My first like sexual awakening attraction was cartoon cyclops from X Men, and that kind of like stand offish like comb over like no attent man that that and then also those like very like popped collar like Puka shall necklace, and I still will. I'll never pass over a porn of that. I'm sorry, But how does how does Scott

and x men um that? I guess those are two overlapped. I don't. I don't know. Okay, that's fine that I wasn't. I wasn't like interrogating, you know, and I didn't feel like you are. But well, I think that the thread here is that you're not like your sexual impulses are like crazy. I remember when Jersey Shore came out. My first thought was, Oh, it was not that all those people are ridiculous. It's like, oh, I desperately want to fuck Polly Day. It was like, is very hot? And

so it was Ronnie and very hot. No, Ronnie, I don't get because I think Ronnie has an anger problem. I get Ronnie. Yeah, I mean yeah, like if you're gonna talk about but then you're getting into their personality about Vinnie and Vinnie such as sweet boy. I must actually attracted to Vinny, though I am embarrassingly infamously especially attracted to the situation for me, situations like a butterface.

I mean, he's a classic butterface, classic butterface. Was there like a type growing up in Denver that was like forced on everyone that was like yes, yes, it was like, um, the skier swimmer hybrid totally, it was this. It was the ski bombs, which are just the geographical um equivalent to like a surf a surf bum. Yeah yeah, that's I think pervasive, like oh that guy surfs and therefore

is hot. Yeah. But for me, like my high school is very much like the hot guys of my high school were tape up like pretty tan tape up like that. So remember tape ups. Blowouts? They were big when I'm even two years Like everyone's two years younger than me, and you guys are included. But when I think three years, are you serious? I'm twenty nine? Yeah, but he only just turned seven but I only I only just turned twenty nine. Well somehow I'm our our birthdays or week apart.

Scorp Um. I'm very much scorp but I um I but no, like blowouts big that like that like Poli D haircut yea yeah yeah um and you prescribe to that. I subscribed to it, and I like, I still did you just correct me? A bitch? Did let me tell you something? I just suck you because it prescribed. It is prescribed, it could be subscribed to, but it is

also pressers. And I look to you because I don't know my words, but I do know my heart trade and I look to you, who knows one of my words that I don't know my heart, but I will say that prescribe implies a pre like just like a pre sort of like prescribe. It's like a doctor like writing something down for you or I guess you could say, culture prescribe that to me, and I subscribe to it in turn, or you ascribe to something. So I mean, you know what, no one's wrong, but yeah, all of

my high school crushes did kind of like fall into that. Okay, so you liked a lot of guys that were named like Justin m you know. And so now when you're out there on the hunt, are you looking for a Justin? Not really, but if like that would be like a fantasy situation because all those guys are inherently straight, you know what I mean, And like like you'll never meet like unless they're like um new league, if like you

won't often meet. I don't like I don't need that, but I yeah, I'm like I would also, you know, I don't need it. I don't need that. I have a question I like to pose to the to the group, which is, would you, at this juncture in your in your lives, have the patients have the time even if the chemistry wasn't like fully, you know, let's just say, Okay, you're gonna say, do we have the time and the patients to like backer vance in a newly gay person into like as as we're in a relationship with them.

I don't think what do you mean? He means like you know, like like like are you going to be like their? Sure? Oh no? Like yeah, I think that's I think it depends on the person. I do understand though, wanting to be someone's like sure, but into the gay world, like I understand, especially if the connection is mostly sexual. Right. That's why I think a lot of us have stories about like a call Me by your Name type situation

where you hook up with an older guy. When I saw that movie, which I would give a solid eight point five out of ten, I don't just like it as much as Bowen, but I see some issues with it. But it wasn't I mean, I'm not going to sit here and say it swept me away. But I did UM connect very much with that, and I think there is something in like, uh a younger or newer gay that you're like, I want to be the one that saves them, right. I don't necessarily feel that, but I

I famously from the other side of it. Came out when I was like twenty five, so I felt like lots of people were like not sure, but it was like sexually like but I always felt like gay friends like teaching me how to be gay. I feel this might be irresponsible for me to say I feel like coming out now. There are tons of materials out there, honey, for you to read up. It's a whole different story. Honey. I've been too during a little bit at my old

high school, Thank you Algebra. Yeah, it's so funny being back there because it's like a Catholic school and there's so many like just gay kids. Now at UM, I wouldn't have said I was I can communicate it. That's what some portant. It's not about being good. It's a communicating and also I'm kind of good at it. And so you know what, the fact that you just claimed that, yeah, I know, I'm in a really good space right now about kind of accepting credit when I deserve credit. That's amazing,

But I do I don't remember any aligebras. Every time I'm going to go meet him, I don't know what he's doing. I just in the hour before try to learn as much Aligebra as I can and then hope it like it covers what he's doing. But there's so many gay kids out my high school. I always want to go up to them be like, you know, you would not WoT to do this when us here. It wouldn't be appropriate. No, I don't think it would. I think also it would jepardize your position. There is absolutely

jeopardize that. But in some ways I feel like there is some thin obligation to let these children know, these young girls, know what the struggle was and how we paved the way. Truly, well, we're taking credit when when credit is due on the other side of the corner of this gay uncle, and it's like the exact opposite where it's where he makes you feel guilty. Not guilty, but like I feel that generational difference were like, which I appreciate. Yeah, yeah, totally. I saw a torch song

with him recently. The third guest we've had, so I don't need to need to talk about it, but I will. What I will say is that Tabitha from do you guys watched Tabitha Tabitha Salon Takeover? Oh yeah, yeah, I'm familiar to this Australian lawsbian goes into goes into small businesses and is a bit to everyone and to fix their business. And she was in the audience fives ahead with her girlfriend looking Gardez. Famously, one of Kate McKinnon's first um the first sketch Kate McKinnon when was in

on SNL was an impression of Tabitha. I had no idea that was the first I remember. I guess I remember her from doing Penelope Cruise, which I guess it was bizarre for her to do. When she did Penelope, she did an impression of Penelope Cruise that was literally like just like less Bliss Bliss with Bliss, like literally The joke was this woman says words weird because she is she'ssl It's but hey, I mean, I guess you can do that. Got right in there. There's definitely a

way to do that. There's a way to do that. What I'm saying is check your privilege. Kate McKinnon, that's a beautiful thing about I guess having more gay visibilities, we can criticize these these gay successes openly. Yes, it's like when you come for Sam Smith, like when I come for Sam Smith, but I also come from from for him, from a place of supporting him. Yeah, I feel that that's a crucial part. People always think that, like, oh,

gays are talking about each other, gay's gays, gays. I would say, everyone's always says gay, um, but that's not necessarily. It's just that we want the things that represent us to be as good as they expects. And also we are allowed I mean I don't think so, honey, critics for the most part. But that's why art exist is is to have a discussion about call me by your name. And when you come out and you give your tweets and you make your Facebook post that literally make it

seem like you're stupid. If you don't like call me by your name, then you're contributing to a toxic culture. Thanks. I almost always when I connect with the culture, it's about like observing people like that's why, like, that's why I respond positively to reality TV. Yes, that's why that's the big drop for you? For Like, I watched a lot of Beverly Hills Housewives yesterday. What do you thought of you? Which season? Erica Jayne is a superstar? Okay, so this won't win me any fans. I don't like

Erica Jayne. That's insane. Yeah, it's not like I feel it. She it's not what I'm there for, Like like I feel like, what are you there for? I'm there for like a Lean Davison. I'm there for like I'm there for like an owner woman who's like just trying to make friends and might navigate her social and I don't feel like that's what Erka Jane is using it for something else but just fine, but like annoy it's like keeps.

It's like like I feel like she's like doing drag in a way that like I'm not trying to watch, Like I'm not trying to watch when I watch housewives,

you know what I mean? Like I want to see like women try to connect over like um, their lives and Ricka Jane, I don't think it's willing to I think that Erica Jane is different than all the other houses because she's not necessarily directly contri ebbitting to the drama as much as she is commenting on how ridiculous everything is and being too good for it and literally being too good for it, which I don't want to watch.

I do you want someone who? I want someone who's they're doing it, and then I care the viewer have my own commentary. Erica Jayson is that she doesn't want to play ball. Yes, well it's not what she signed up for. Tell me if you, but what use bone as a brometer for this because he doesn't watch it?

But tell me if you this wouldn't tickle you. Lisa vander Pump, who's like the house familiar she is starting yes, yes, like and Lisa Rena also who starts a lot of I can't It's like, yeah, after RockA Mars, I will follow her to the end of the year, right, but she knows she's on Housewives, and it's like really, yeah, she needs to like take She's gotten even better since like two seasons ago, where she was like literally I

think her brain was actually literally fried. If I'm like trying to contrive like arguments with people literally two different things to two people and then be buildered that it's like a problem. But okay, So Lisa vander Pump like says to someone, you matter not where pink, pink is my color? And Erica Jane. They cut to Erica Jane. Erica Jane like rolls her eyes direct cut to an Erica Jane talking head, and she goes, I'll wear a pink wherever the funk I want. You can't own a color.

Beat it's not possible, and then another beat she goes, also, why would you want to own pink? It's not that great of her color. And I'm like, you're gotta be kidding me. I say that. I like that. I like that's like her, like actually giving her opinion on an interaction in the way that I feel like, Um, I just it feels like she has writers in a way that I don't like, Like, well, I don't think that we're seeing like an actual person. I feel like we're

seeing like a performance piece. And that's fine, but it's not what I want when I watch Housewives. You want I want? I want Sonya Morgan all day God, because that's a woman who's trying to engage with her life on screen and failing. But like, um, but at least what we're seeing is like a real human being. Sonya's on real Houses of Eric and she's truly just she's just a real like But it's just really interesting to hear um and this is just true of anyone who

talks about reality shows. But like of what we demand of reality show you know people, it's just that like like you're like, I'm listening to you say I was she engaged with her life more? And I'm just like,

that's so interesting, that's so interesting that we are. I'm not saying you're making demands of anybody, but thank you for her acknowledging that you're not saying but to hear, but to hear just the the overall conversation around around reality show stars being like she should change her life in this way that is fully on display. Well, well, no one has made this demand. They have signed up for who I forgot who said maybe it was you, maybe it was July, and it's just right now. But

someone said you have to know the assignment. You said that you have to understand that and understands the assigned absolutely whenever she's face still face still in the universe or no, she's still in the universe, but she hasn't made an appearance, and she's never been a regular. She's always been like somethingho pops in. Who is the housewife who understands the assignment the most? Um, Lisa Wrenna thinks that she does, but that doesn't count. It doesn't count.

Maybe maybe like Durnda Medley, I fucking love Dorenda, you would be obsessed with because Dorinda will literally be screaming and then but then also on the flip side, DURINGDA is like the coolest one. She gets very incoherent. It's like when she's when she's sober and present, you're with her the most because you're like, yeah, Dorenda gets it, like she's like someone that you know, Like you love Dorenda.

And then when she has a moment where she's being like either like to slabby or incoherent, it is so crazy because you're like, where is the person who exists inside you? That's rational? These are my favorite house wives? That is you, Yeah, you're kind of DA favorite housewives.

My favorite housewife is Carol as well, who's kind of boring but like but yeah, she's never like it never feels like she's making demands of me to like, um, be entertained by her, like she's truly just living like she really it's truly voyeuristic to watch her because she's not trying to like she doesn't like she's a Kennedy. She doesn't care if she gets off the show tomorrow. It's crazy that your favorite is Carol, But you also prefer a housewife that nixes it up. Um, I don't always.

I prefer a housewife who's who I'm what I'm looking for here, what I'm my criteria here is authenticity, like if like do scripted er like I think eric should do scripted or do concerts of what she does, but like, um, and then and then if that's what you're looking really good and pay for that concert. But I don't think that she I don't think that there's something about Erica

that offends me. And also there's something about her that feels a very very like pandery to me, like specifically the gay man that it's like, um that is also like I feel paid gianizing like um, I like she like her. She has this creative director Mikey, who's like she brings on all the trips and like and like it just feels like I don't. I mean, he's living

his dream life. But also like she like he'll get her already, and then she locks him up like in his freezer while she like goes to like you know what I mean, I don't. I just feel like she really like um game and feel like toys to her in a way that I don't like. And I don't know. Isn't the housewives? No, not in this way, not in this way? You know what, Beverly Hills really goes out of its way to do And I noticed they really

go out of their way to do this. And they want you to know that the housewives and their housekeepers are family. They like, but that that's a that's a that's this tradition like New York did that a lot, like Loui Anne's house housekeeper was her family Rosie. Um. They love that. Oh my god, what do I know? I think even I'm following this because it's so it's crazy, Like truly, what we've seen in the last ten years is like the complete raveling of a person. And it

is crazy. But she's in treatment now. Maybe it's the best thing that could have happened because now she's in treatment. Yeah, you gotta get to the bottom. Lunn's narrative is this, like she she grew up in Connecticut, was like in nursing school, moved to New York on like a modeling contest, like one of modeling contest was a strug beautiful girl, beautiful young girl. Yes, it was a woman who saw what the world had to offer and wanted it. And who can fond her for that? Especially not you? And

not you? And and so she wasn't booking in New York. Who can't relate to that? I forget why books? And you book too? I never booked. And then my in l a last week didn't book. Okay, well guess what didn't book? I'm sorry, that's okay. So Luanne goes to Europe, I d k y. I forget, and she marries the count.

Not yet she is like comes this kind of like personality in Europe, Like she's like a game show host in Europe, and she becomes this like after I forget what, but I remember thinking, like, wow, she was like a deal or no deal host of Europe. She actually like sports commentary. It was insane. She was the Megan Markle of the time, a little bet and so she then wait, no, actually not at all like the Aaron Andrews of the time. It wasn't you know you're a deal deal, You're actually

actually weirdly right. It's actually weirdly right about a deal or no deal. Girl is going to be real family. And honestly, when you look back at dealer no deal,

it was truly offensive insane when you look back. But but so so she's like is making her money, like as a TV personality in Europe, the time of her life meets the count her and I kind of a world when they go they subway, come back to New York on vocations, subway to court after two weeks, take a subway to town Hall, get their marriage, and they go to the Swiss Alps where they're raising their kids. Thereised no kids there for years. Luanna is driving her

kids along the Swiss Alps mountainside. Car tumbles off cliff. Okay, destroyed. They climb out of the car. She's looking for her kids. I swear to God, this woman like this is the story of keep going her two kids and she she brings them barefoot walking along the Swiss road. Maybefot, I forgot what is it? Why isn't this a TV movie. It should be You're just So they get to neighbors house and knocked. You're like, She's like, our car found the cliff. So they get back to her husband account

he can't believe what's happened. It's the Swiss are never the same for lou She after that experience, she felt she hated the Alps. Yeah, I mean I would understand, okay. So so she moves to the Hampton's, where she becomes a New York social and becomes friends with who but Jill's Arran, who was in talks with Bravo about her show called Manhattan Mom. Jill says, I know this woman, Luman,

she'd be great. Luma was doing these like insane stupid self produced like web videos with her and her daughter, like shopping at TJ Max for dealspons look for badgets and so yeah, crazy, I've seen them. And is that what kind of crossed caused the dissolution of her marriage to the Count? The long distance by the time she got to the Hemp, the Count came to the Hampton's. But by the time they got there, I think, I honestly think like the car tumble like played a part,

Like they just were disconnected. She gets on this reality is an origin story. She becomes like desperate to protect her family because now her marriage is crumbling. But she just shigned up for this um. So for the first three seasons, she's very closed off, very like pretentious and very um like holier than now because she doesn't want anyone to see like the cracks in her life. Count

leaves her for a younger woman. She's single, and that's when she got really real, and that's when audiences really came round on her. Also, Jill left to like have become like a real villain of the show, and so Lou and was like then branched out more by herself. And so Lou for a couple of seasons was great.

Like she famously like was always bringing guys back to hotels and like banging them, like but they would go on trips, brought guys back, and like an episode where she banged the guy and they all got really jealous. They all they all got really mad that like she like banged him and then like they like left this guy like upstairs, y, yeah he was, he was in the room and what's her face was so annoying? Was like I can't believe there was a man, and so

how would you feel? And it was really aline lasted all because they were really mad about it. That wasn't fake, they were And lu Ane's thing was, what if I had a man in here and you brought the cameras

in because they have like there's unbroken code. Don't bring the cameras in my room and the doors closed because you don't know what I'm doing in there, so whatever, and they were streaming and she famously, now this woman who used to be this like European like Ingenue was slash like Countess is now like in it's morning, she's in huge shades, a big black bikini and just the bathroom and she says like, don't be all on cool, be cool, don't be all on cool, and we've all

seen the game. And so then she meets this guy Tom, who has slept with two housewives, Ramona and Sonia previously, and then all they're all they're dying to break this apart, like they just hate that Luian's like winning and um like he's cheating on you, like he's doing all this stuff and take no. Me and Tom love each other like we're both players and we found each other like, I'm the I love when girls like I'm the female

version of him, you know what I mean? She was BRILLIANTO that and so then so then on a Miami trip, Bethany gets a photo texted to her from New York City at the regious Regency Hotel, Tom making out with a woman and Bethany her lips at. Bethany Luna long term rivals, filips that doesn't know what to do, sobbing in her badroom. I don't know what to do. I wish I didn't get this. Yeah, it's really hard on.

She conflicted about whether or not to tell, and she goes as her enemy famously, she goes Luanna, so she already tells other women and they're talking about it behind LUN's back, but all under the guys, like being a good girl for d and so Bethany says, Lou, I have to tell you something really bad, and lu goes, I hope it's not about Tom, and Bethany goes, it's about Tom. They tell her. She like the flips out, but it becomes this thing where now it's clear Tom

cam on cam. Now it becomes clear Toms she on her. But it's also because of the narrative that's built up, like it becomes this thing where if Luan does not marry this man, and the other women win because they've been trying to break them up from the beginning. So she got married, divorced four months later, and then famously

what happened. She um in a drunken rage, like would locked herself in someone else's hotel room, like slam doors and cops faces, like telling people that she would kill them, telling coms she would kill them. But what was this Christmas incident about? This year? This is when she got this was that mat is drunken, disorderly and screaming, and she tried to I read a report that she tried to escape from the handcuffs and the cops screaming I'll

kill you all. Yeah, it's no, it's and yeah. And there's something you know, like Shakespearean Lee tragic about But I will say I will say this, that is the story of Lou but the story of you out there listening last races listeners. I just want to point to someone, Mariah Carrie Maria. Last night on the New Year's Rock and Eve, she planted her to goddamn wealthy feed and the age and it feels like eight degrees fahrenheit. She was looking freezing as and screaming for her tea, but

she never got to get the tea. But she did sing well two of her big songs, her first single ever, Vision of Love and hero and and she sang them. And that is a triumphant story. And I'm happy that two thousand seventeen and this is actually also very indicative of seventeen for me, starts with a tragic display of failure from Mariah, and it comes back and she was triumphant. And maybe that's a narrative. We can ride into your lowest lows, can launch you into your ist ties. Exactly

what was your highest high? Running the act kind of word three times in one year? Absolutely, and and it was our honor to bestow that. I would hope that's also both of you are high. What was your highest high? That's not necessarily a bit question, Okay, not necessarily a big question. Highest hiv Um. The live shows were so fun, truly, I mean that, um, And it was really cool to

see the response. And that sounds you know, really no, I think that's whatever, but um And going to Australia was really emotional because it was it was just me, Like it was just me, like going back to the place where it was like, oh, like I'm sort of in right here. No, well, it was like my dad kept saying like you're made of these things. You're like you're made of these of the of these minerals, and we have this water and all this stuff like this is this is what made you. And I was like, oh,

that's cool. Um, so that what about you, Matt um? Well, I first want to say, that's like me and Ma and Pat we have that, but with like Long Island, New York, that's beautif all that's beautiful and we're made of bagels and like cancer cells in the wall. I love that. Um probably for me probably going to just for laughs, Yes, beautiful. Probably that was the highlight. That's great. But then like also, I think when you have a year with a lot of hi highs, you have you're

inherently with a lot of lolos. I had a lot of lolos, big, really big, big time lolos. I had not that high of highs and not that low blow. That's good, that's good. I'm really excited for you about that. Are you banking for higher highsoul sarily lower lows. I would say that that's a fair thing to say that I'm hoping for. Yeah, I had a good year. I had a good year, but a boring year, you know what I mean, Like nothing like things were good this year.

Like last time I was here, famously in tw thousand and sixteen, I was like in a bad place. Now I'm in a good place. I think that you starting the year with the show that you're doing is going to be very good thing. Tell us about the show. So I'm gonna be doing my shape called Pat Regan unwrapped in moving at the backs, and I'm gonna I'm doing thirty minutes. It's gonna be a little storytelling. I love it. Um And it's just like this, like where

I'm at right now, you know what I mean. It's just like and there'll be lots of my jokes but lots of stories. There's okay, so a little different, a little different. It's somewhere I've done. I've done this similar sets twice before. You've seen it'll be very similar to that, but with new stuff, like a half hour you're doing a half hour. Yeah, and yeah, I'm excited. Aaron and Josh and Knew, Me and Darren are all opening up.

That's amazing now. So like also we have to say you shout out to the Duplex, which is becoming a very pre eminent place for people to go do their work and they treat us good. Makes you shout out to the Duke Blex, shout out to the Blackmine place. Now are you going to be doing UM? Will you ask them to remove the piano? I will not, but I won't be addressing UM because there will be a piano on stage and famously, like I don't know if you identify as a singer, I'm not a singer. I

don't sing. I'm a triple threaten other way is how I don't need to list them. Be get podcasting, very good at famously keeping check check and field statist things. U these are threats. Now. I don't want you to start a podcast because I think that people might choose to listen to that one over this one, and that will would be really terrible because I first and foremost care about me and B It would be a huge betrayal.

But but it would be a huge betrayal. But do you ever think about starting your own like I don't know platform for your voice on a mass level. Um wow, what a I feel like I'm on the couch of and I hate till they use this kind of inflammatory word. But Ellen, I feel like I'm on a talk show. It's more like I'm not calling you out. I'm saying I feel like I'm on talk show. It's like Stern. I feel like I'm on Stern. But um, maybe yeah, I don't know. Maybe I haven't given it. I think

the world is your oyster. I want. I would listen to Pat, and I'm saying again it would be a huge betrayal if he did start his own podcast, but I would listen with enthusiasm. Wow, podcast of Pat really just digging into, Um, the the researched minute of some topic could be running. It could be the Housewives, could

be could be anything that he is passionate about. I my deal with like all things, is like I feel like I I have such low awareness of some things that are maybe important, and then like the things that I ran like arbitrary like that I'm drawn to. I become obsessive and like every single thing true. That's culture,

that's culture, that is cultural, that's why you can. It's always like easy to say what it is like for me, it's like Orlando Kelly clarkson reality television that was competitive For me, it's running track and field distance running at the NZ double A level, at the professional level, and it's housewives and housewives adjacent reality. I don't, um, oh, I guess it's video games. Um, you know, uh, day planners,

Like what's the trendiest day planner? Yeah, And I got a new one for the new year, and it's really it's it's great. I'm worried that I'm gonna fall off of it though. Um. And oh god, did I see you writing your day planner today? When I met you? A graphic it's called guys. You know what do you write? You just like this is what I'm doing today? Um? Yeah.

And there's just like you know, fun little layouts for like the month, and you write your you know, you know, your goals, or you can just scribble like like today I was, I was drawing. I was trying to like, you know, costume design, like what my uniform for the year would be, like what like the like the template firm, And I think it's just gonna be like you know, ribbed black sweater, gray running shorts, great joggers pants. You will draw out your like outfit, no poorly. I'm just like,

oh like what like? Because I was nice to dreams. I tell you one of my goals for when I'm rich. When I'm rich and stylist kind of, I want to I'm gonna get really into fashion and I'm gonna i want to beat fashion police. Do you watch Project Runway? I have old seasons, but I always like it and I trust my esthetic, but I just don't try, and that's why I often end up in like hoodies and running pants. Matt is a new confert and I feel

like Matt has really gotten an education. I love Project Runway, and now I will be more interested in the things I put on my body because of it, like right now for two and I believe I'm gonna be trying like because I love to be four years later. On trends, I love. I love like a button up to the top flannel and in a nicely foot fitting pant. I am on a lifelong quest to find a pant that fits me well yeah, um, and it's hard. It's really hard because a lot of times, like what's good for

your waist is not good for the sea. Yeah, I just they yeah, and I don't know where to put them on my HAPs But you know, it's so it's such a struggle. But I think that that's what your thirties are for, is like finding those answers. Um, that's comforting. But yeah, so I want to get willing into fashion, like I just talk out of the money, like like go into a storm, be like these are the things I like. So I end up just like wearing whatever. I do. Want to ask you, just because it's been

referenced multiple times in this conversation. Ages such a such a big sort of touchdown for you. Famously, you're the first twenty three year old you you will be the last twenty three year old back. But as as you keep referencing you going into your thirty I want to know a Pat And I'm sorry if it feels like you're on the couch of Ellen, but what are your hopes? He has two love seats, by the way, it's just like to likes. I'm just quoting Pat and I doesn't

have a couch. Okay, well guess what. I don't know my couches, but I know my heart I don't know my set. I don't know my set lightouts, but I know my heart. What what is your overall feeling as you as you enter You're not You're not thirty yet, but I'm twenty nine. I'm only twenty nine. You have like a you have, you have another ten months of being exactly, So what what is your overall feeling of Because I'm getting to this point now where I'm just

like really thinking about age. But as you enter your series, as you keep referencing it, and I'm just pointing, is that this is just an observation, what is your overall

feel totally? So I'm gonna try not to like push to think of answers, but I'm just gonna say things that I feel like I think about as I'm getting over I want um to have a nice apartment, Like I want to have a nice apartment somewhere that's like my space, And they want um to feel like I've crazed, like I think I want to write like essays, like pros essays, and I don't do that quite. I'm doing artists way right now, and I shout out its praises

though I have produced nothing since doing it. It's only the only thing is morning pages right exactly. And I also want to run a fast marathon and I'm not sure like what that number is, but like I wanted to be, like I want to feel like I've putten in like five years of like a certain level of

training that I know what it looks like. Right now, my life is to transient like always like this week is going to be really bad training and like last week wasn't great at some weeks in the falls, but I want to if this is boring, but I want to like do that by the time I'm thirty five, because after the five you kind of start declining, where even if I could, you could have run really well

after that. But if I run my best marathon after that, always, like I wonder if I started, Like I wonder if I because I famously used to run quite a bit and now I'm trying to reclaim that. So that's like on the list, and um, I think I want to be I want to be like I want to write television. I guess also at some point, but I'm not like Marry. I don't need to write. I don't I don't need to I would if I had to choose be like writing television and writing like more like um prozy stuff.

I would choose prosy stuff. And I don't know how much of that is. I just like don't like Celtics or like how much of it is, Like that's what I want, But I also have like the least the dream of like not even the dream, but like the part of pond dream of like being on Like I don't need to be on television. I don't need to act anymore, Like I never wanted to act. And just because I like doing comedy like I was, I guess I have to act, but I don't feel good at acting,

and I also don't like it. So you were just talking at coffee about the difference between performance and acting, like it's it's this kind of weird thing where it's like you could be very good at like sketch comedy or like improv or something, or being on stage and like doing these things, but then when it comes to like the cameras in your face or like you have to actually engage with something in a real way on stage and like getting to the truth of the situation,

like that is so hard. And just because you are good at comedy does not mean you are an actor, and it is so hard. It's so much harder than it looks like. Erica Jane was just doing an audition on Real Housewife and I literally I was like, she turned it out. She was great in that audition, And I'm and I think that she's probably a very talented woman that I would probably get along with, but I

don't think that she's a good Real housewife. Right. I was just saying, you know, she accomplished acting on that show in a way that I didn't expect, in a way that like, even though she was doing nothing too great. I turned to Sudy and I was like, wow, she slaid that. You know what, she did really well on that audition. This was an audition from last season, I

think season seven. Yeah, um, she she like took notes, like she did a read it with alien and then like she got notes and she slayed the notes, likely took direction. Yeah. Yeah, I think she's a talent, I really do, but I just like, but not a housewife. Okay, So it's kind of like that performance forst acting, Like, I don't think that Sonia Morgan would be a very good yes, exactly anything else, Yes, but she is a

good housewife. It's rare to intersect being a good housewife and being a good actors, but Aileen Davison does it. But here's the thing, it's like crazy, imagine imagine, imagine, imagine if you realize that your true talent was being a housewife on television. That's huge. I would right now being a reality star, Like when of the best gigs you can get with spawn con being what it is, you know what I mean, Maybe we should just do that. I would do I would do a reality show in

one second, because I love reality. People always ask me if I would do reality and I would do any reality show. I have to reveal something. I would do a cool version of Gay Batch. Yeah, totally. Oh, I don't know, Actually that's the one. I don't know if I would. I don't know if I want to find love on reality TV. It's so humiliating, But what if you were like a breakout start see. Yeah, but there are other there's so many easier avenues. I'm kind of

being physician. If I was on Gay Batge, I would be there for the wrong reasons and because I have so much respect for the authenticity of reality television, I would have trouble like being okay with that. I have a question about reasons. Is is it a wrong reason to be there? If your goal is to become the next batch, that's the reason, but okas are bad. But

here's the other thing too. In a way, I don't mind wrong reasons if like I'm not a big wrong reasons like Queen, because I think because I think at all, as long as we're opening to the open to the possibility that it could have, even if you're there for the reason you're like, oh if I like this guy and like we explore love to then as long as you're open to that, and I think you just need

to be there and be open to it. But some people are there and you can tell like they're they're not ready to emotionally open themselves up and look for love. And I think that's a big gass. I wouldn't be able to do that. But I also would never sign up for that reason. So I think Wells as an example of that, like someone who like big Time, who is there not for the right reasons, but not even like yeah, like I think well As there for his ego.

That's my ballas is there. My sister was like Oh my god, Wells and his girlfriend who's her name from Modern Family? I don't know her name. What's Sarah Hyland? Yeah, she's like my sister likes a bachelor and bachelor and she was like, oh, Wells Adams and um, Sarah Hyland are so cute. They're so cute, and I kind of was like, yeah, but you know, they're only dating each other because they're famous and wouldn't be dating if they

weren't famous. And literally what they have in common is the fact that sometimes people take pictures of them, right, we'll see I could like knowing well As the way that I do, and feeling like I kind of know Sarah just from like watching her. I could see them

like being really in love. But I think that Wells would never like go on like I think Wells and he is someone who requires that certain level of privacy that he couldn't do it there and I think he, like if you watch, if you watch JoJo's season, like, Wells is completely unable to like try to open himself up to a relationship. And then why is he repeatedly on these shows because he's popular. He especially was popular in Joe Joe's season because he's like they they they

would have you believe he's like witty and funny. He

certainly would. It becomes increasingly clear that he's not, but they let him go on extended bits on Bachelor in Paradise as like this girl went into the ocean and he like narrated it as like this like Australian sea captain or something, and I was like, what the fun it's contextually he was funny in joy because he was like at least like the voice of reason, but then he became like during his first season at bachel in Paradise he famously like when on a date with Ashley,

I who's of course the biggest I will watch. Actually I's full spawn con stories like I don't care, like I actually have a storm. Actually I had the storm. Actually I had the storm and her she's only guilty of feeling. That was when it became he that like voice.

That that's when that's the well's first season where he had already been on his season, and then that's always a change, like every season two of every housewife second season is their real first season, but that's when we're seeing them after they've already been on not even relaxed but aware, so like they then they've seen them right, they know how they look and so well as that you could tell Um his first batch of in Paradise season, I knew he was funny, like Elissa Edwards, and and

then and then it only got worse in his second Batchel in Paradise season, which he though. I have more respect for that because he didn't come in as a as a contestant. He was there just as like a bartender who wasn't looking for love. You lean into it and you either succeeded leaning into it, I think, like Elissa Edwards does. Like e Lissa Edwards, this probably the most famous Rupol's drags. It really is, you know what, you should maybe even start with All Stars three, which

is about an all Star season. That's fine, I didn't. I think you can start because you get a lot of you catch up really quickly with an altar because they have to give you background on on queens that

have been there. So I also think with Rupole's drags, you can start with literally any season because that one season, no matter what the quality of that is, Like some people might even say season seven is quote unquote bad, Like you can start with and All Stars one I think is not as being bad, but you could start with any and get obsessed regardless of quality, because of what the show is, and then just start from wherever

you want. In the beginning, you can pick the season that your favorite queen was in, but I think you would love why. I feel like your reality show media diet has to include, well, it's becoming I am have an increased sense of guilt, like over not wi I mean, don't feel guilt about I get that too, have Game of Thrones. Just just just you know, make that actionable

and just do totally. It'll be on action items than you because actually, I'm sorry to everyone listening if you don't watch Rupole's drag race, But actually it's going to be a part of twenty eighteen Lost Culture Racists. We are going to be talking a lot about Rupol's drags like it's going to be something that we talk about. So you don't bravely that is brave in this climate. I think that I, um, lately, I think that I lately I've been watching a lot of Survivor, even like

old seasons of Survivor. But is that true or is that just I think that because it's true. Yeah, he thinks that, but based on research that he's done on his own life. I reflected and I and I came to the conclusion that I've been watching quite a bit of Surviving. Watched the pilot episode of the first season. I've recently watched it, and I was like, Oh, this was finding its sea legs. If you will, do you want to hear something hysterically funny. I have never seen

the first season of Survivor. I've seen almost every other season. Yeah, but I watched the season finale of the first season.

I was literally same, literally saying, that's how I got into Survivor was the final four of the first season, which was famously Rudy, Susan Kelly, and Richard and Susan Hawk's famous speech but I and then I came into with a heavy Minnesota accent, um, but I am that was a star in the making moment because she didn't understand what reality is telling that reality reality now is

a whole different game. And then it went through like an adolescence where it was like, um, now these people are coming on having seniority shows, and now we're in a new place where like these people have grown up watching it and it's it's like just a part of their world. Like even I'm a big I watch Big Brother on CBS and that is my sister's obsessed. That's the kind of fans because it's on three times a week. It demands that you not have a relationship like it

demands like it demands you for the summer. And there's also live feeds we can watch and even Julie Chen is like posted up yeah, true, Jolie Chen should get em an Oscar Award for a Big Brother an Oscar Award and Oscar Award. The title of the episode, sorry, No, it's the story of Lou misleading. It makes you think the wholepisode is going to be about Lou and it's not. This episode has been so much more than about It's

not about the big chunk. Remember Julia TB Julia Style's conversation, but most of the Big Brother conversations with them like laying around on like you know, their couches, but they're big like comforts on them and they're like I think I'm like do you think I'm an Amanda? And they they're they're only points. They're like trying to figure out who they are to the outside world who's watching, which is like that's something we didn't see on reality like

five years ago. Who do you think Bowen would be Pat's favorite queen? Because I think I know, Oh this is so hard. I think I know who would be his favorite queen. I think he would appreciate Tricksy because of her. It has it has to be someone who's not that self aware. So really someone who I guess knows the assigned. I don't know someone who knows the assignment, but it's also like not fully tapped into what makes them watchable. I think that's maybe I'm like misreading what

Pat response to it. So it's like it's it's knowing, but like Lisa Wrenna knows the ASA, but she's still not authentic because she's trying to The assignment is to just be authentic, and so if you're trying to do that, then you're not you know what I mean. So it's like I don't know what that means in the Rue Paul verse, but for House, I think it's like I truly think it's like maybe a cheat. I think actually, like when I'm something for everybody, um, when I've seen

drug shows like around town. I think when I'm the ones that I when I'm impressed or like when I'm the ones that I get in, the moments that I get into are like the fun, like impressive, almost like athletic, like um dance stuff. I will say that watching a live drag performance is so far away from what the

entertainment value of drag race. So but having you having said that, I do think you'd like as you like a Lissa, you like cheat G. You might even like Kennedy because Kennedy is authentic, and I think that when I wanted, even though she's not the most interesting engaging queen, I love Kennedy. Love Kennedy, I think, and I think that I agree that I think what I would respond

too is not necessarily like. I think that the one who I who's drag I like the best wouldn't necessarily be the one who I like the best, but I would on a personal level. Yeah, I think you would hate the like look queens. You would not like. You would not be a Violet trash key fan, you would

not be a Pearl fan. I might like that though I like the like the realism of like I like when I feel like, they're really recognizable characters from my life that I've seen, you know what I mean, Like when it's Ago, I know that woman, you know what I mean? That's fun to me. But then I'm like, wait then do isn't it just like characters the Drag

Race too. That it's that's very interesting is that it's a show about professional attaining some sort of professional success or actualization, where it's you know, might be true in the Housewives the World, but it's like you're watching these people grow as artists, and so you might respond to certain narratives about people like learning and learn, like figuring

out in the moment what makes them great. I feel like maybe like a Kimchi Pat would like or someone you know, someone who has like this great arc of like I don't know what I'm like, I don't I'm out of my league here, and then who like totally I always respond to that. My favorite genre of movie is like Girl in Big City, like trying to make it, and I think you would like I recently just mist Frances Hat and I really liked that. Lady Bird is the only great growing movie I've seen. I've never seen

Lady Burt. You would love like that. I want to say one thing about All Stars coming up. Somebody told me a hint about some tea, and I will say, if this tea is true, it is going to be a unpredictable and very fun season. You can you say what that t is. If I said the tea, it would actually be sort of revealing the success of one

or two contestants. And therefore I will tell you after if you want to know, I will not get mad at you because I have been really through it on this podcast and in my private life about potentially ruining quote unquote things. But I don't think that. I think that people are out again me is what I'm saying. Are always okay? So but I'm being brave into yes famously. And something that the listeners can look forward to in is, you know, maybe some specific content relating to drag race

on culture. There definitely will be and and yeah, we're we're taking a stand, you know, you know, we're taking a stand outside of the regular episode release, Cadence. I mean, maybe you've listened to our episodes in the past with Josh Sharpen and Jackson and also Nicole Silverberg where we talked entirely about RuPaul jack Race of the entire time. I don't know if it'll be that will be, it might not be that in depth, but we're going to be discussing it absolutely. Okay, let's move on it. I

don't think so, honey. Yeah, I get so nervous for that's insane because you're the icon and that's fine. And that's why because you think that Heavy is the crown, Heavy is the ground and that is at least of inner pump quote is it really? What's the best real house? Heavy had the words? So what I'm thinking about now is like what Luian's headline won't be, And this is what I've settled on. This is what this is what I would pitch M. I have the right to remain silent,

but I'll always speak my truth. Can I send it to I would love to be that guy that writes that I wanted. I want to know. This is how you know when you like see like I remember seeing like um like behind the scenes verge of like Ashley Simpson like writing her songs and it's like some guy like old guy with her in a studio and they're

like collaborating together for like hours. Like That's how I picture, like those taglines getting rid, Like each housewife goes in and they like they have like a twelve hour Like who are you sing about the housewives that are like pathetic and nothing? Their taglines are always like I'm always extre mad about them. Was like like when Kristen was like,

pretty is not as nice as it looks. I was like the previous season, her first season, she got shipped because her tagline was I may not be smart, but I'm pretty, and then she got shipped, so they said pretty is not as dumb as pretty as not as dumb as or something like that. It was just so, But I actually like, I like Kristen Takeman like I don't need you to strong like I need to feel like, but I feel like I know christ and Tykeman if I if I saw her, I connect with her emotional controversial.

I'm gonna say this, I am not here for housewives that are young. They're not always they're hit or mess. I don't want young housewives. I want housewives in their forties who feel like there's something on the line totally even if there's not, because they're rich and taken care of her life. They you can see the panic like in their eyes. Because what I love is when there's a nice balance, when there's a cask with like a thirty year old like and then there's but also like

a five year old. Yeah, yeah, well anyway, yeah, let's do it. I don't think so, honey, because there's obviously I mean, this episode is looking back onto seventeen and looking forward to as in eighteen, and there's so much to discuss, but we do have to eventually end it. So now we have to do I don't think so, honey, despite your fears, so okay, but to a sewage those fears, you know, Matt and I will go first, as we'll always go first. Thank you always set you up for

success things. Don't you ever forget that? Thank you? Okay, man, do you want to go first? Or shall I? I'll go first? Okay, alright, this is Matt Rodgers is I don't think so, honey. His time starts now. I don't think so, honey. People with regrets, okay, because guess what, they're in the past. And unless you have a little um time machine. Doc Brown asked, bitch, you can't go back, and so why would you even waste time saying that you have regrets. Guess what that then that happened two

thousand four. You will never go back there, so look forward, honey. I don't think so, honey, regrets. Why would you even waste someone's time saying that you have regrets unless you don't want them to to make that mistake in the future and in that way, and if that's true, don't frame it like one of my biggest regrets is you have to frame it like, honey, for the future, dot dot dot and never mentioned regrets because regrets are you know,

regrets are not this season's highest fashion accessory. I'll tell you what is confidence? And button five seconds? What's wrong with being confident? Let me tell you something. What do I regret? Nothing? And I'm so sorry I impose on the sanctity of your I don't think I thought your time was up. I thought we were going to suck on it. That's why I spoke up the bed. Can I tell you something I wanted to? I don't think so, honey.

People who don't courtesy flush because earlier today I had to piss someone's ship off the side of the bowl and that was my chet, so converse, I wasn't going to give you up, but he took a big explosive ship and clung to the walls of the toilet, and I had to when I went in after him, I had to piss the ship off the sides of the bowl, and that his friendship. I actually actually wrote a song

about this. Cool. Really, you want to perform it now? Sure? Okay, um let save it from the end of the podcast. We can do it at the end because we traditionally ended with a song about this, Okay, so we'll And I'm just thinking, firstly, I hate when you're at like like I was just out of brunch and I and like, I hate when you're at like a close space and this is I don't think this is my I don't

think so, honey. But like when you when the flush is not strong and it's like you can't the onus is on you to press down or or when you flush it and it's just like it doesn't really do anything and you have to like, wait, I have to step in because it doesn't matter. That's not an excuse. If you are leaving the bathroom and it looks like you've used it, I agree, but I'm saying it, and I don't care if you leave your piss in the toilet because to save water. That's disgusting, especially if you're

a p is highlight er yellow. You're sick, You're sick mentally, physical and treatment and see that, because you know what, honey, you're really sick actually, And you know what's funny about this whole thing. This is what I'm saying is a lot more engaging than my actual I don't think so, but all but I don't think, honey, is going to be real boring, but everything else is going to be so so, so so so good. Um, I'm gonna need my phone for this because so can you get your

phone out of time? My phone keeps falling on the ground. No, no no, no, you have to actually, I guess no, I just I just need to reference. Um, it's such a scene right now, be looking from my phone. Okay, just use my just use just alright, this is I don't think I have my phone. I was like, I have to pee and I'm like thinking about that. Well, stop thinking about that, because you're somewhere really where you

have to focus, all right. I don't know, honey, bone and your time starts now, I don't think so, honey, The general manager of the Colorado Ski and Golf on Havana Street in Denver, Colorado. Bitch, I had to get my ski boots re sized because one of your salesman sold me a shitty Solomon boot, and Honey, I had to. I was in horrible pain last year when I was skiing, and my dad was f livid. Was like, we have to do we have to correct this, to do something.

So next year, which you know is this year. I e. We go to the Ski and Golf off we say someone sold us a terrible product that gave me horrible last year. Can you please help us? George at Colorado Ski and Golf, the general manager roundly ignored us for the better part of forty five fucking minutes until a nice young man, Zach, came and said, we will heap these up seconds, span the width and expand where where is the pressure. I will help you, Zach. I love

you so much, but I I will. I will. I'm gonna. I'm gonna do something. I'm responsible. Call three or three three seven four to complain about the general manager. George. I've never done this before, but I will use my platform too. Sick my supporters, I don't see you getting your fucking notebook out and right in that because it's not because I don't. And George of your list question, and George, if you're listening, Treatment, I have a few things to say about that one. George Treatment to come

into the stage. Solomon boot free. Zach will always be the savior. Zach was the and was he hot? He was hot. You can't be named Zach, can not be hot to work at a ski shop and rule culture number fifty one, you can't be named Zach. You can and working a ski shop and Zach Zach, I will say, is the platonic ideal of a salesperson who explain he's just so helpful, he was so understanding, he listened, and

here's the thing he might work for. He might work on commission the service that he provided for me free of charge. He said, this is totally free. You bought the boot from us, We get to we get to recustomize this for you, totally free. And you know what, but that being but that being said, called their place his points of employment and complain, no, no, no, don't

don't even do this. No no, no, I'm sorry. I released the phone number, not not not to do the number not to attack the establishment, but to one complain about George, but to please, please please get zachar promotion or a pay raise. Zach deserves that. I love Zach very much z because what could he be making? I don't know, but he deserves to be making so much more. He was so well spoken, so nice, so genteel. I loved him. I love za. Yah. It sounds like a

really good guy. Okay, so you know, um time has come. Okay, I'm gonna do it. This is gonna be pat Regans. I don't think so honey, and his time starts now. Okay, I don't think so honey. Bread because my days eighteen thing is less bread, just less. But I don't like the way it's insidious, invites me every day for lunch. I'm like, I'm not going to have any bread, butch and all. I started considering options, all road leaved the bread, and guess what puts me? I need a twelve hours

sleep after I've had even one slice of bread. And I don't like it. I don't like the way it makes me feel. I don't like the way it tempts me. I don't like the way it makes my body look. I don't like makes me feel bloated, like I don't think so honey bread like it's involved in every single dish. It's all over and it ruins lives, it ruins family, damaging, It affects my entire day. I can't escape from it. It's everywhere like it. I think, it acts like gets my friend and I want it, and then when I

eat it, I feel so so tired. My brain gets tired as it is right now because guess what, I ate bread. Even though I said I wasn't going to me in the beginning of a teen I'm gonna eat less bread. Also in the beginning of a team eating bread. And that's what I hate about bread. You can't trust that as far as you can throw it on things. Honey, bread makes me so fucking tired. It's like an ambient pill shaped like by that. If you sell bread to be able see treat man, honey, what do you mean?

Come on? Deliver God? Thank God. It's like when Meryl. It's like when Meryl is in the post and she gives another amazing performance. It's like she did it again, but bat has done it again. All right, now, listen, how does mouthing over the mic that he has to pee so bad. I guess that we have to in the episode. But wait one more little thing. Um January fi fire texs in advance on Purple past dot com, did you set up your Purple Past account? I sent

my prop bast account. Tickets are flying off the shelves that we got them, and and link I might ends up pant riggs b A t R e e g. As my Twitter is at pure Regan, follow me Batch if you don't bow me on Twitter. And now, as as Pat is getting ready to go pee, I'm gonna sing a song about courtesy flush. This is Yang last Coltress, this is Matt Rodgers, last Culturas. We've just Pat Regan.

Here we go. Now, you gotta courtesy flush. If you wanna be my husband, cournecy flush with you, leave the toilet, because if you want to leave your pie and up, you gotta curne flash. If you wanna be my husband, take a deep breath, be fine, leave the toilet, because if you want to be with me baby and someday adopt a kid, you gotta courtesy flash. Ah your pianship. You need a flush two times. You need a flush

two times, beautiful. This has been a Forever Dog production executive produced by Brett Boham, Joe Silio, and Alex Ramsey. For more original podcasts, please visit Forever Dog Podcasts dot com and subscribe to our shows on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts. Keep up with the latest Forever Dog news by following us on Twitter and Instagram at Forever Dog Team, and liking our page on Facebook.