"Live From An Australian Cave!" (w/ Alan Cumming)

human body is amazing. Isn't the body one of the most amazing things? Actually, it's a rule of culture. What number is this again? The human body is amazing. It's one of the most amazing things in the world. Talk to us about what brought you to this place? Well,

I sort of like, what was that? A straight wedding on Long Island with all my high school friends, and so that you can sort of fill on the blanks there, I ended up ended up sort of wasted, drinking tequila on the rocks with my high school friends at a Marriott at two in the morning. So that was how that went. I'm so happy for you that you're able to do this because I think I don't know if I'm speaking for I should just speak for myself. I will speak for myself. I do not speak for me.

I won't speak for you or anyone listening. I couldn't do that with people from high school who I haven't kept up within a while. In a while, like, there's just so many cobwebs gossamer threads that we'd have to, you know, just sort of try to dust off. And I look, alcohol is a wonderful social lubricant, as we all know. But I just think great lube, great lube. I just would still be the gun oil of non

sexual lubricants. Oh my god, gun oil is sexual. Though, What are you saying so I would say that alcohol is non sexual, Well don't. And sort of what I'm saying there is that gun oil is the lube by use. Okay, So that's a bread crumb for the readers. Alcohol could be considered a sexual Lubritense in many ways is bowen. And that's why I stand you so because they're always thinking outside the box. You have sort of one of those most subversive queer comedy minds, and that's what shoots

you to the top. For your consideration everyone. I know you get your ballots in hand. Makes me deeply uncomfortable that you talk about this every episode. Now that I think it's funny, and I think it's going to happen, I think it's and and then I think it's gonna be I don't want to I don't want to talk. It makes me so uncomfortable to think about. Yeah, you look really uncomfortable. I'm on the ballot too. It will never happen for me. For the show, everyone, for your consideration.

Matt Rogers, hot Dog. There. The billboards are everywhere in Los Angeles everywhere, for your consideration. Ads are so annoying. It's like we get it, we get it. Um no, but anyway, um I do want to also shout out, you know, the human body is amazing. You know what else is amazing medicine because I am on a steroid right now that allows me to speak to you, my god who and you've got the prescription straight away. He didn't even give me a prescription. This, I'm gonna say it.

I'm gonna say it hot straight doctor at the City m D. And you know I'm on record as not being about City m d s a k A. They're like an antibiotic candy store. So I basically was like waiting for him to say, there a chain restaurant. Yeah, there a chain restaurant. But what I'm waiting for him to say, here's an antibiotic. Here's a Z pack. I don't even really need. I'm not even gonna look you in the eyes once. Just here's a pack. Throw it at me and get the funk out of here. They

gave me a shot of a steroid. It was a gatorade. I don't know how to describe it. It was like a shot of gatorade and there was a steroid in it, and I took it. And now I'm on a steroid. How does it feel? Fucking fabulous? And he just he is flexed um speaking of steroids and being gay. We want to and I'm not saying anything about this NFL player, but we want to congratulate this openly gay NFL player. What's his name? Some Carl, Carl, Carl Gibb, Carl Carl gellib.

I didn't really I I said good for him. I said good for him. I guess what does this feel like? I I'm having deja boudiculton Underwood in a way which they're not the same. They're not the same person. It's not the same situation at all. I'm like, are they not? I don't know. I mean and until until Carl does like my favorite Amazon products to help me feel pride like that was the funniest I've read in years. Hold on? What did it say? Hold on because because because it

was like, what are your favorite Amazon bias? And we should say I did text our group that about it, and Boone immediately said, unfortunately a publicist wrote this, but I do I which I which very eliminated for me. A good job Bowen seeing all the PEPSI cans as it were. Yes, oh no, my go to water bottle is Voss. Is there great for me when I'm entertaining or when I have guests over. Difference are great for Voss. Water bottles are great for me when I'm entertaining or

having guests over. So we can say that sometimes when he has guests over, he's not really entertaining. Baboom okay Reebok Club C eighty five Pride shoes. There's nothing better than a fresh pair of white sneakers, and these are nothing better. And these are the Reebok Pride shoes. I like them not only because they're white, but because they've got a little pop and a little and that's essentially me. I like to be clean, but all also have a little flair and a little dazzle. These are great shoes.

I mean, it's it's a high coup. It's wonderful. It's poetry first to end on. These are great shoes. He said. I love these because their white. And that's a brave thing to say. As they say, and as they say the world over. You know, we both had we both had very straight um weeks. You at a straight wedding seeing a hot straight doctor, me being in what I think is maybe the straightest city in America. No, that's

not true. I was gonna say it's Savannah, Georgia. But it's very there's a very gay story that happens there, which is Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil. But I mean otherwise, it's a pretty it's it's bachelorette party Central. It's bachelor party Central, and said and and and therefore I would say it is a very heteroic city. Um felt very it was very nice. Was there with my sister, my parents, my nieces, my brother in law. Stressful to eat out every single meal with two children,

I will say, two young children. Young But it was a lovely time. It was it was, it was you know, my sister. My sister had a nice escape from from Atlanta, um and my brother in lawn. The were do for one, The kids were do for one. It was nice for the for the whole family to be getting together since the pandemic. All I'm saying is I don't think I love Savannah unfortunately, and I do have to be public about that. Well, you gave it a shot. I gave it.

I really gave it a shot. Will you'll try anything? Once I took the ghost tours, I learned all about the bodies that are buried under every square. I learned about the Mercer Williams House. Of course, I learned about the ghost of Flannery Ricconnor, the racist ghost of Flannery Ricconnor haunting a house. All of these things. I love, love, loved. I just don't think it's a city for me. And

that's okay. I think I needed I need to start recusing myself from a narrative of every city in America is a good city because it cannot possibly be true, because if every city is good, then no city is good. You know what I'm saying. You know? Then, ever, then everyone would live in every understanding, you could simply be chaos. And we understand the case. Oh, I understand, you understand. But I think it's great that we sort of got some straight going during Pride months, because the weekend of

Pride is a on us. I got it out of my system and and this is going to be a stressful week. But we're we're we're strapping ourselves in and the straightness ends right now with this episode. I'm telling you that right now, the straightness ends right now, especially while we bring in our guests. Oh, I can't I can't really believe the guests. Do you know what I mean? And like you no, I I actually I get exactly what you mean. I can't believe the guests, do you know?

But like when I say the words, I can't believe our guests? Do you do? You know what I mean? Yeah? I do? And I sort of remember us sort of. I guess I guess you'd say starting this podcast years ago and thinking we'll never get a guest like insert the name of guests. Here are guests name. He's just he's had probably as prolific of her career as you could want. Is an exercise in futility to name all the credits and think, oh, yes, we've encapsulated this whole

man's career. We're not gonna do that. But he's otherwise above vo men about town, about the world, owns the wonderful Club Coming in the East Village to say that that place is your place. The poh my god, I stopped. I stopped the boards of Club Coming many a time. People might remember in the in the grade before I was Catherine Cohen's sub whenever she wasn't there, I was there. And it was called it wasn't called Cabernet, cabinet, it

was called Griggio gig and I got it going. And I think Alan Coming would have been very proud, and he would know he would have been very proud. And look it's back. We encourage everyone back in New York City, if you're visiting, if you live here, to go give it a visit. Wonderful shows happening every night, wonderful bar experience. He's also the director of the New audible original Hot White Heist with an all Stark Beer cast including Cynthia Nixon.

I'm Rodriguez, Donte Rio, Jane Lynn, Tony Kushner. I can say this sentence as if he's not in it, but it's led by Bowen Yang, who is a talent, a queer talent, but the queerness he supersedes it. You know what I mean. He's he's he's international international star. Wow, thank you, thank you? And who who else would be an international star if not me? Would be our guests? Everyone, please welcome into your ears. Allen Kind Allen, thank you, boys,

Bo and Yang and Matt Rodgers. Wow. We we were talking before about how good it's it is to hear him say your name, and then he said my full name for the first time, and oh boy, it was like bad. It's just it's just one worth it worth the way. You're joining us from an opal mind, tell tell the listeners the readers where you're from. Where you're coming from. I'm in Australia and South Australia. I'm an Adelaide memor artistic director of the Adelaide Cobalt Festival, so

I'm doing some pop up club comings. Actually such fun d G and then we have performers and such fun um and then I'm doing my own concerts show at the end of the festival. But I came here to this place Couber p D And ironically I just did Anderson Cooper's show before you guys. And but it's called Couber with a B. And it's an old Opal mining town and everybody lives underground because it's so hot in the summer. So I'm actually in a hotel that it's underground.

And you just see these little kind of funny pools sticking out everywhere, and that means there's a little air hole going down to some little person. There's seventeen I know all the facts. The people live in this town. Seventy of them live under fucking ground. That there's an element of danger here. There's an element of danger. What's do you feel safe? One of the thing is I can go out into my corridor and look left and I can see daylight, so it's not I don't feel

quite so bad. But that's that's unusual. Yesterday I was in an Opal mine, I was in an Opal shop. I mean, I mean, I'm an underground mind. Sorry, an underground shop, an underground cafe, an underground cinema. I did the whole thing, an underground church and underground Serbian church. This is a whole It's a city of males. It's just so weird. It was a weird Serbian priest ranting at this little Italian man who was a toutist, telling him,

who what do you call him? Leonardo da Vinci was I nearly didn't know he did well, I don't know, he didn't couldn't get a word in edgeways, and I just was like, I was about to say, leave the boy alone, let let him be, but they kind of wandered off. But it was it's been crazy, like you know it. Also, they shot a part of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert here is you know that it's got that weird out back sort of an industry town where the industry is kind of almost gone and they're sort

of pushing the toutist thing. It's just a mishmash of crazy. I love it. I love it. So then the history of the culture doesn't reach down there, and that's why this person didn't know Leonard da Vinci. You can't blame him, Well, yeah, you rest from it Italy? He was Italy? Is it Italian? That's the thing. I was like, he's had a little Italian boy And if little Italian boys nowadays don't know

Leonardo da Vinci, we've lost something as a culture. If the little Italian boys today know Luca better than Da Vinci, there's something wrong. There's something wrong show biz. Did you see did you see who won the Univision song contest this year? It was it was Italy, wasn't it. It was Italy with a song with a rock and roll song, and the man snorted the line of coke off the table,

apparently allegedly. And my favorite thing is when he came to you know, when they come to win the Univision song contests, you have to say something to the world, and he went, rock and roll never dies. He was right, he was right. What do you think of sort of like Eurovisions sort of because I'm imagining you're a fan Eurovision pivot to sort of not honoring pop music as of late, it feels well, I think that was just I think that's more like the the Italian one obviously

was a freak. I think it's the fact that the public get to vote now right. I don't think that's wrong. I don't think it should I think it should be the weird little judges um and because like the weird Little Judges voted that little Austrian, cute Austrian boy with the sort of falsetto, which is much more what I think of as a Univision winner, and then the general public block voted for the Italian rocker alleged Coakheads. So I don't know. I'm a big fan of your vision.

I've I've I grew up with it. I'm very influenced. But I think in my eclecticism and my you know, lack of respect for sort of sort of normal pop groups, I think you have some quirk and and also my embrace of tacky pop songs. That's my thing. I keep saying this to people in Australia. My and a club coming one of my things about getting older. And you know, in my fifties I became a DJ in a barman part time. And I think both those things are about

as you were saying about the lubricant, it's both. Both those things are my ways of encouraging people to let go and just have fun, not care what people think and be and be judged, and so I I think like, for example, I put on some Eurovision hits during my DJ sets in Adelaide, and I like it when people just let go and dance. They're actually in Australia, they're good at letting go America so much. And what about

what about the UK? In the UK ada better? Yeah, because they like the whole sort of thing of you univision is quite a good sort of metaphor fun. And also like you know, pantomime that we have at Christmas time where the concept of drag and cross dressing and things like that, and our our gender play is much more so those things are more in the mainstream culture, and I think that helps people. They don't feel that they're going to be judged for being too sissy or whatever,

you know, for when they dance to certain songs. So Americans are there the struggle, they're the challenge. It does feel like the pop when I was growing up in like um discovering, like even like the Late night like Graham Norton and you know, everything like that. I just I was always envious growing up here that the pop culture seemed gayer, Like it all just seemed like a

lot more flamboyant. And then then you know, as as you get older and you understand, like you know, the government in England and everything like that, it is very rather conservative. So I think, like it's probably it probably feels maybe it's the grass is greener thing. I don't know, I think it is to that, but I know I think it absolutely right. It is gay. It means it's it's queer sort. It means, you know, queerness is more in the main stream of culture also, and I just

think that's something that's. Yes, it's a conservative government, but I think over the years just in our you know, as like I guess, I mean maybe from Shakespeare's time, the concept of men dressing up as women. Maybe it comes from that. You know that that's that's partly. I'm sure that's helped. But even with race as well, Like I we often watch um, you know, I've got one of those who I shouldn't say this, it's not allowed.

But you know, those things that you can pretend to be somewhere else when you're not, the sort of VPN things gives you a fake I p addressed as everyone has. You're you're scared about talking about VPNs dangerous now we know how to a probably danger Well. Anyway, I watched BBC I Player and you know, British show is quite a lot and it's so fascinating in the commercials. Grant, my husband, I was he was really remarking on this that how much more integrated race is as a concept,

Like it's not like here went in America. Rather when he feels like, oh, he is the black people commercial, you know what I mean, Oh, we're doing but there's some Asian people in this commercial. Now where it's in Britain, it genuinely feels like this is there's it's just all mixed and it's just like it's much more I think we've gone. It's sort of post trying to be make a point about it, and it's just actually reflective of

of of the culture. And I think I think that's the same with queerness as well, actually in terms of

it being more integrated there. Yeah. Yeah, any time, let's in terms of like let's just say racial diversity, it's like any time uh, there's a you're presented with the image of a group of people, like on a college campus, sitting together and it's all different races, like there's something about there's something about that presentation that that that suggests that it is forced in a way, or that it

is underlying how diverse this is. But wait, it's kind of yes, and it's too aware of itself, and so therefore it sort of breaks, it sort of defeats the whole purpose of like how right right. I think that's a lot of stuff in America that people do, you know, It's it's interesting being away from it a little bit and looking and thinking that you know, there's a sort of way that people know that they and that's what

was interesting. But the past four years is that we we sort of know how we're supposed to behave, for how we're expected to behave and what is proper, but actually a lot of the time we're paying lip service to it and that and you know, doing Trump, those that that that didn't that change and people didn't pay

lip service to anymore. So I think it's good that we push these things because obviously there's a long way to go and there's a lot of danger ahead potentially, but I think we have to find a better way of doing it so it doesn't feel disingenuous like that you're saying it's actually funny because like literally, like right before we going on, I realized there's a connection between this week's episode and last week's episode, which is we

had Busy Phillipson, who's obviously the best friend of Michelle Williams, and I was telling her that I saw opening night of when you guys did the Revival, and so I saw you just absolutely I mean, your performance of a lifetime, etcetera. You've heard it when the Tony Award come now all that, but you truly were stunning. But I was thinking about how I really actually did not know, I said to study who I went with, I was I was really bad.

I didn't understand because I think I had only seen the movie Cabaret once when I was younger, and so I didn't really understand that it was going to be as dark as it was and as sad as it wasn't as about Nazis as it was, to be honest with you, and so I was thinking after, like, you know, obviously that musical depicts a culture that is very liberal and like sort of you know, seems to be extremely progressive and free, and then the darkness is right around

the corner. So I just that's such an interesting thing that it's been a part of, like such iconic work that you've done too. That very well, Yes, I think I've done, you know, and other other things I've done as well. Actually, there by, I feel my thing is that don't and I always say this. I was just talking about Pride with Anderson Cooper prior. Sorry to keep name dropping, but I don't know who that is. We don't,

so you know, we're not familiar with her. He and are part of the Silver Fox mafia were taking over the world. But you know about how I feel, you've got to be vigilant, you know that because it is

we are perilous. We're in a perilous situation. Sure, great strides have been made, but look how quickly, Look how quickly it happened with Trump, when all of a sudden trans people are the devil and all these things, and you know, all these things have happened, and our rights are being eroded, were being eroded in many ways, and it's a struggle to get them back. And I think

that's the fact that that was. And you know, if he'd got in again, I am so I was getting death threats by the end of the by the in the campaign, you know, regularly on on Instagram and stuff for posting anti Trump stuff, and I started to feel scared. And if he got in again, I was I would I would don't think I would have lived in America anymore. It would have been very hard. Yeah, I mean it really, it really did get to that point where it felt

like it could be the end of the world. There totally and it could be easily like there's our now you know that thing definitely that that you hadn't been virulently homophobic, but it was definitely obviously on the cards. Anyway, We've got to be vigilant, and I think a lot of these A lot of the work I've done is about that, about sell but here's the situation. Oh but

look how much it hasn't changed. I did a movie called any Day Now about a gay cup in the seventies trying to adopt this little down syndrome child, and that was about like, it was a beautiful film, but it was also when we came to do it to promote it, I was thinking, well, you know, it hasn't

got that much easier. You try from you try adopting a child in this state adoption system when you're queer these days, you know, there's lots of gay people with kids luckily they can afford to have a surrogate or got a different route, and so there's we just have to be vigilant and not resting our laurels. And I think that's what I slightly worried about Pride as well, that it's like harrah harah and actually think you know, maybe we're should we not have we should we should

we should hope for the day when we don't need pride. Yeah. Sure, Between me and man or friends, we've all talked about how the meaning of it or the whole ceremony around it is just changes over time in every year, and it's like what it even mean. Like I mean, like

I remember a time when pride was for me. It was literally about like, oh my god, like this is like the first time seeing like queer people together, you know, like and now that yes, but that's what it's good for, and that's why, you know, old you know, assholes like they should stop saying things that because it's for people who don't have the outlet to do that. And I think that's great. I don't have a chance to do it,

and I once I went on a gay cruise. I performed on a gay cruise and it was it was crazy thing I've ever done. It was like a bath, like I had to go down the stairs to the stage.

I kind of got on in St. Lucia and they've all been on for like about five days, and I got taken down to the way the stage was and it was all through the little the lower cabins, the lower floors cabins, and it was like on every door I had, it was like they're almost like their grinder profile and every door and the doors open and little, you know, little hints of what you might see when you went in photographs like the rest the ocean. Totally hilarious, and I was a bit like, oh my god, I'm

just trying to get to the city. Anyway, did my concerts and then what I but what I thought was lovely about it was that there was people on that boat from all parts of America who don't have but who don't live in New York and can't go to a bar that you can you know, whatever can happen in the back room, or or they don't have that those kind of options and so it was so exciting and liberating for them to be on that boat and to feel safe to be able to do all that.

And I think that's what Pride is good for. But I think my overall worry is about the obviously the corporation that you know, the corporate sort of takeover of it, and the fact that people think, oh, that's fine, we've done Pride. Now, we've done the queers have been we've done our service to the queers. This year, we've all put on a rainbow hat and got drunk. And I feel it's that's that's my worry, that that kind of diminishes or perhaps um impedes our progress. Sure, are you

are you experiencing any promo at all of New York? Like, are you, like at all like experiencing anxiety from being away from York this particular summer? Not really, because I'm having such fun. I mean, I'm basically doing New York and I'm doing club coming in, I'm dressed in a monkey suit, chancing around to Tackie pop songs, banging drumsticks and you know, bringing there's great performers here. They are hilarious. Do you know hands remember hands? The German. He was

on American Idol. He's this Australian man who dresses up as a sort of in leader hoose and glitter and he's he lives nadly, so he's been doing great things. He actually did with Henry, he did, he did. They did a Tcheikovski Britney Spears accordion mash up. That is the most Henry thing. We have to tell the readers because they're going to be so excited to know. So Henry is obviously a dear friend of the show and beloved ex boyfriend of mine, but dear close friend also

my musical director as well. But he's with you there, he's and you said he's on the other side of that Opal wall. Yes, he's in. He's come with me to the Opal place to couber p d. So he's like just a door down and we're waiting for me to finish this so we can go on this plane. But he's my musicals for the and he does like for my concert. But also he's the musical director. And we have a band at club coming in the Spiegel tent.

And what I love is my favorite thing is I DJ and then the band plays along, and I just dance around, and I just I danced for like hours on end, and often in a rabbit suit, off in different suits, and then you know, stuff like that is such fun. So I actually don't have for more about New York because I feel I'm getting my fill here. And yeah, I mean I missed. I love when I see the pictures some from club coming. But yeah, you know, I'm actually pretty pretty stated, But I mean, I mean,

it's a bit nice to get back. You know. I often think that having fun as a choice, and I have a feeling about you that you make that choice to have fun a lot totally mad. Yeah, I absolutely do, and I think it's I think it's really interne. I think happiness is a choice. Actually, I really do, and I think I mean not not that I dismiss any

kind of rough compression or mental illness. I've suffered that myself utually in the past, but I actually, yeah, I definitely feel I've I've made a choice to live, you know. I I always say this slightly sort of Hallmark cards kind of thing, but it's true that, like, I have great access to darkness, but I choose to stand in the light, and I think that's and also that darkness helps me in my work a lot. But you know,

that's why I don't really like actors. I mean, I don't really like hanging out with actors, you know, because they talked about acting all the time, and I find that just to mentally boring. I'd rather just do it, do it, go home, go out, and not fun. Years ago, I did this play Bent. You know that play is about gay people in the Actually I have I've heard of the play. Yeah, I don't think. I can't say I know it, but I know of it. It's amazing,

played by Martin Sherman. And actually in a funny way, he actually kind of brought to the world's attention the fate and the and the lot of career people in under Nazism and like. And this is a play about a man going to a concentration camp and and pretending to be Jewish because you'll get treated better if he's Jewish then if he's gay. And it's and it's so it's you know, it's it doesn't end well. It's a really bleak play. I did this in London for years ago,

and I made a point. Oh and it was all these boys are also it was totally all men cast lots of Nats season blah blah blah and horrible. And I was me and this other boy where the people in the concentration camp and we and I just knew if I did not like leave it behind and have fun, I would go demented. So I did. I had to actually had the best time, even though it's the bleakest, most despairing thing to do. I left, I finished the play and I walked off stage and I just like,

give me a drink? Where are we going? And we really And I think that's really important to do that. I've heard that a lot, yeah about people that do dark work, that they need to mean, they need to have aggressive fun while they're doing it. Absolutely. I remember Joan Collins if I made drop another name, you know, you know Bobby de Niro and John Collins said. John Collins came, how do you do this every evening? Do you give it to? I said, by not talking about

it afterwards? Johan? Yeah, but how do you do it as a Joan? By not talking about it afterwards? So I mean, I was like, I don't want to discuss this. You've seen it obviously, it's how sorrowing obviously, like really insane. But now I'm not doing that anymore. And I think it's like that thing about you have to choose. You have to also you can choose to fun, you can choose to happens. You can also you have to choose

when you're not working as well. And I think that's something like, you know, like last night in this little place in the middle of nowhere that people came up to me doing dinner and I was like, oh, no, I'm not going to take a photo. I'm actually just having dinner with my friend, like and you can say it in a nice way that means that you're that this is not an appropriate time yes to happen. Of course,

Oh my gosh. I always say that. I always say to people, I'm not going to take a footo of you, because if I take a photo with you, everyone would see and then everyone would want one and I'd have to do this all night long. Thanks so lovely to meet you. And they're like, oh, of course, of course, And that's actually just taken the time to explain it to them and be nice and people really get it.

That's that's that's beautiful, And I of course This is like the time honed thing that you have developed over the course of your career. It's like you you know how to relate this information to these people. Yes, and it's just and the biggest and the biggest thing I always think, my mom, because it's just just be nice. It doesn't cost anything to be nice. And actually there's no situation that works less well than when you are

nice in it. So you told me this story when we were recording how Wait Heist of when you am I allowed to say this when you when you and a certain actor on a certain movie went to a nude beach. Oh, yes, you can see okay, because this this, this is I feel like you're inheriting something from Syrian McKellen. Yes, when you guys were shooting X two, yes, where it was like Germany or something or was it was kind

of done in Vancouver, Canada. It was Vancouver and then okay, so then so that you guys just don't tell the story. I love this story. And the thing is like we he came on my podcast that you Didently Coming Shelves and he talked. We talked about it because the thing each week I have a thing you know that my shelf and the thing that there's two things the thing. One of the things is a little necklace I've made from Hemp that he bought from my dog at this

new dist beach. And the other thing was a little a little bracelet that had my name on it that this film that we were working on another film. Actually the little the daughter of the director, and I was making beads with her one day and then and her mom said, oh, she's finished the the necklace and she wants to give it to you, but she spelled your name wrong. I was like, oh, that's charming even more

it said anal. And anyway, the Ian study was we were shooting X men and he's I always think of Ian mccammons like a fourteen year old girl trapped inside an eighty year old man's body. And he said to me, you know, we're we're living quite close to each other on this place called uh, I can't remember, uh, what's

it called? Never mind? And but it was near the beach, and and and but there and further along to the west was a new dist speech that yet and he said to me, oh, we apparently there wasn't just read on the newspaper there's no just beach. No, yeah, that's right. It's called rec Peach. I've read, but I heard about it too, Yeah, yeah, sure. A couple days later, Oh, Apartner, I wrote this thing about and no just beach. I said, yes, I said you said that the other day and yeah.

And then if then she was like, oh, well someone told me they've been to this, no this beach. I said, do you want to go to the nudist beach? And anyway, he went, well, if you want to go, I don't know like that. I was like, let's go. So we go, and you have to walk down this lovely sort of verdant little path and then you come to this lovely beach and it's all like big, you know, three chunks have washed up on it, and you can sit against someone. And then he went in the podcast he was going

and I went down there. No one had a stitch of clothing on. I was like, no, it's a nearest beach. And so we got naked and he just had a little sort of like a little hat that like cricket umpires wear, you know, one of this. I've got my dog. We're walking along, me and him, and it's so funny because when you get when you're naked and you get recognized, it's a really funny thing because people are look at your face and then they immediately dropped their heads down,

get your junk. You know, it's it's immediate, and it's so it's hell alias and Ian was like, hello, everybody has scandal things like that, absolutely loving it. And then there was a guy came just to sell us little pipes. You know, there was all you could buy put pookies and everything, and this man had made homemade pipes on a piece of string around his waist and he was naked. Ian and I were sitting down and he was I couldn't see that one. And so the guy's coming close.

He's a penis level to our faces and I'm like and he was like, oh, it's a lovely one doing like that one up by It was such a gas. That is so funny. I think that's a great story because it makes me think, oh wow, Alan coming in here a McCallen. Were these two gay actors on set for this like big blockbuster movie back at a time, and like, I don't know, like I mean, I don't know that well, there weren't too many and that this

this wasn't really part of the conversation. I mean, I'm not talking about this in terms of like a representation thing. I'm just saying like, there's just obviously there's a shorthand when you when you when you run into another queer person in a working moronment like that. Yeah, yeah, totally, And just I don't know, like, like like, what what was it like for you guys? Well, it was that was that was the gayest film I've ever been on, actually,

because you know, it was actually is fucking amazing. It is it is the Crown Jewel so good in it too, and it is, thank you much inherently queer because of its X men. It's an allegory of queerness. All the little little mutant singing and there's even a scene where he sort of has to come out to mutic to his mom and Chris Brian Singer and there was some of the people, the writers and everything was it was a very aside from the actual content of it, had

a very queer sort of sensibility. But I mean I think now, like you know, like telling that story now

it's got such a different things ha ha. You know, quirky quirky Allen quirky Ian, whereas then it would have been a bit more like subversive weird or what they're doing that's kind of we don't you know that that's changed the way that I think people and even I think the way that people understand queerness and understand even things like you know about monogamy and stuff or lack of in the queer community and how there's different rules and relationships that I think is much more prevalent now

the idea and just take that concept, and I think and in the funny way, I think, you know, when when all the margin equality thing happens. One of the things I said in a statement was I think, actually queer people have a lot to teach state people about relationships and about how to maneuver them, and and and I think that's true. I still do think that's very true. There would be a lot happier if they let go of the whole idea because it is a very patriarchal,

like yeah, they're in a prison. I mean really, because I think that there's a lot of unhappiness, especially amongst like you know that like baby boomer generation in America because and I think I think there's a lot of alcoholism because of it. I think there's a lot of like repression in that in that demographic because they they're too married literally to an idea that's not and they've been fair this thing that my thing. I think it's

really awful. I think as awful as that one thing one whatever you call it in discretion or one part of one one way you've failed in this vow, because in this pact, that's basically what it's saying. If you

fail at all, then the whole pact is over. Like I remember when my brother got divorced the first time, and it basically when I you know, I was like, well, that's so what you kind of something happened one night when you're away and for one you know, and then your whole life is over now, yes, and and and I think that's the thing that that that's that's what

that is so damaging. And so what happens, of course as people just repress it and do it and and and lie and you know that, I think it's much worse ways of betrayal than actually discussing how you feel about the notion of it happening, and how you will how you'll all gather together again after it happens and be fine with the happening. I just think that's they're fed this Hollywood ending of how life should be, and we we everybody knows that's a sort of ship, yet

they continue to buy into it. It's remarkable. It's weird the indulgences that are allowed, you know what I mean. It's like, it's it's just it's when you take if everyone were to take a step back and look at it all, it would look hard because odd, I know. And I think that's what I thought was so great about Hot White High School and bringing it back too. Is that is that Adam, our dear friend Adam Goldman,

who wrote it, brilliant. It manages to get so many issues I suppose you'd call them, but so many like the like the you know, queer people not being monogamous. I would say, mostly it's much much more of a comfortable concept to talk about in queer culture that putting things like that and other other kind of you know, queer life things into a very funny script, very casually and not very not not clunkily. I thought he did

that such a good job of that. I can't believe how I've listened back to it a couple of times to be honest, and I don't mean you don't ever do this with with my own things, um especially especially I mean, okay, this this is just me saying this, and this is something that Adam keeps pointing out to me. He's like, no, but when you're in every scene, I'm like,

oh right, like I am. I'm really this is the first thing that I've done where I like really like anchored something and I should I should just say that, like like put producing making like a scripted podcast, like I just think. I just think the word podcast gets get like just like kind of makes frivolized as the whole thing, because it is not an easy thing to do,

you know. It's just huge, like the sound design and that, you know, it's it's like it's all these things happening on a train and you're going on top of a carriage and it's a huge well it's like I mean, it was. It felt to me like I've made some films before, I've never done anything like this. I did not expect it to be any way as detailed and as sort of of such high production values as it did. Because the world we live in, and I think it's excellent.

That was that guy. Jeremy was such a genius. Jeremy genius our sound designer. But um, but I would leave those days sometimes and be like, oh my god, that was a long day, Like that was a lot of work. And Alan like really directed me in such a in such a perfect way because A don't remember so the first day, so Matt, you'll like this and hate this

the first day. The first scene we do. We do a couple of takes of this one scene, and then Alan's like really like giving me these great notes and he's and then at one point he's just kind of like figuring out what he wants to how he wants to present the note, and then in a lull, I go, you know, um, you can just give me the line

read if you want. It's just like the way everyone knows it at sn L. And then Alan like very politely chuckles and he goes, oh that's no, that's okay, and like proceeds to do his job, which is to direct me, and he's just like actually like giving me the respecting the process enough and respecting me enough to be like, no, I'm not gonna like tell you. It feeds you how to do what I'm gonna actually get you there organically, And like I just I just like forgot.

I was just in such a like fresh out of SNL space that I was like, no, just do it, just do it. The late I was just being so lazy. You just you you had the like you put on the situation, like, oh, we need to get it in now, we gotta move likely at all times I've knowned that what is that what they do is now this kind of like give your lane meetings all the time. Well I mean not all the time, but it's like like if you hit a wall, if something's just not working

and it kind of rests on this one thing. It's you're not supposed to be offended, and no one ever is if someone just like just do it like this, and then the big could I be anymore? I'm using a friends line, but like could I be anymore? Blah blah blah, So it'll be like that. Um, And so that was just I mean even that, like you know, even working on Hot White Heist was just like a reminder of how this process usually works when it's not in like this crazy pressure cooker. Yes, and it was

just it was just so pleasant, that nice. So I'm so glad I didn't give you the lane reading that'd be terrible. I always I always think it's it's sort of like one of those things like and one of the reasons why I don't really like hanging around with actors because it always becomes so moony about but things that happened to you. So like, my God, he gave

me a line reading things like that. It's not that you know that it's I know it's not that bad actually fits, and I've I've actually there have been times and I just said, I actually, just tell me what it is you actually mean, because I just can't get it. You're not explaining it well enough to me, So just tell me you do it, and then I'll do it

my way to make it better. Being out wait, I do want to, like just to quickly just to touch on something we were talking about a little bit earlier, because now I'm really thinking, thinking about and marinating in it, like you talk about this stuff that you've done, and then also like when you actually think about some of Bowen and I truly favorite movies of all time, you happen to appear in quite quite a few of them,

and they are I think some of them. And I say this in the most beautiful and and then the most in the best way dumbest movies ever like Spice World, like we I I fucking we love and also like if you can find a way for us to be able to see it, you can't find it online around streaming, so please let us know Spice World just just justin the Pussycats, it's one of the most ahead of the ahead of its time movies of all time. Josie and the Pussycats love that film. Yeah, I love that film.

Well wait, wait, wait, which one can't you see? Spice World is like very hard to find? Yeah, and it's crazy too because especially during Pride Month, it feels like it feels like an aggressive and it's not like those girls to not market themselves up the Wise Zoo, but on packs of Christmas for years. I mean, I think

the best. And also like Victoria Beckham liked in her seventies three questions, like, um, she she made a joke about like I'm still waiting for my Achievement award about that movie, and I'm like, yeah, but you make a joke, but your Victoria Beckham in the Spice World is High High Success and every single she was I think she's I thought she was such a funny girl on that movie.

There was one. There was one. It was one thing she said that though she like she was kind of she played so much with the sort of being pushed,

but she wasn't really pushed. To me, she's not She's not push but she kind of as assumed portionists as a sort of sort of Yes, she plays postion in the Univision Song Contest and she anyway, so one one day when we're filming the film, it was with a long weekend, it's a holiday, and she we were having rehearsing a scene and we're eating our toast and you know, blah blah blah. I just still chatting as we get and getting ready to rehearse, and I said, oh, what

did you What did you do this Victoria? She went, oh, I went with my boyfriend to the south of France. I said, oh, where did you go? As you went Saint Tropez. I was like, I was like, are you meaning just miss pronouncer? Are you doing that just to be sort of like pretend posh, make it a double on top. I was just whichever way. I was like, I'm loving it whatever. Yeah, And because they went to stay and then of course it's in all the newspapers.

They went to stay with Elton John for the weekend and it was just crazy that time because the girls were that was the most the absolute apex of their spiciness and it was just laz. I learned the Spice Girls dance moves from the Spice Girls. Ah wow, I know, right, that's it. But you have but you have like really kind of um just you've been, you've you've you are part of these things like like Bermie Michelle, like I

got another one. I just think, I just think you, um, you are just you are just a very important figure in all of these things. And so we we we we pair our respects and such. You know, it's funny like people your age, um and and either you know a few years either side. But people who are like so spy kids for instance, And I did There's a Spell like in the Late and so I did loads of those films of like kids films are better like Room.

You know, the expense, I was stuff that's right with with computer couldn't falling on my head I am invincible, but but there was so the Spike Kids thing. It's meant. But what's lovely about that is that in a way I was a sort of a magical part of a lot of people's childhoods and this figure, this character and sort of and I think the fact he was slightly scary to start with it then he becomes a nice person and so it's really it's really connect like in

a fairytale character actually that you know, really connected. And I remember the way that when when people young people came up to me, when when it changed when they were the generation that I had grown up with Spike Kids, and they how they approached me as an adult. It's with this kind of wonder and awe and sort of like, oh, you know your little like little kid's faces again, not

like I tured to five olds. And when I was shooting this thing in Albuquerque a couple of years ago, I saw that I came on the set one day and there was a boy and new camera assistant and he kind of did that face and I was like, oh, cutie, it's he's obviously freaking out because it's Mr Flipped from Spikers. But you can't say anything because it's like, you know,

we're working. So I was coming back from my trailer one time and he was coming out the camera truck and he had his moment and he said to me, he went, alan, I've been meaning to say. I was like, oh, yes, and he went, you touched me a lot when I was a little boy. Never say that again. Yeah, there's another way. The thing is he probably was thinking, like, when I get my moment, what will I say when he arrived at that And you're like, yeah, I just

don't say that in public. Yeah, or wait, wait, hold on, I have a question. Do you know the answer to this? Are you a playable character in the Golden Eye video game? Yes? And I'm I'm me and you can have once been me. And what was hilarious is that years ago when it first came out, I didn't know it was in those

days when I did good Night, it wasn't. Now, when you do one of those films, you sign all these even if they're never going to happen, You sign all these things saying, oh, if I'm in the video game, I get black black percentage. You know, they make the toy of you, so that to do X number of interviews to promote the toy, you know, all that stuff, and it didn't have that didn't happen, and all of a sudden there was just a game and we didn't

know anything about it. Biggest of all time. Yeah, yes, no royalties learning and uh the anyway, one day I was I found out about it and I had an assistant called Landon at the time, and I came to the next I said, oh my god, Landon, I'm in a video game and he went, oh, yeah, I know, I've got it. I said, do you do? And he said, yeah, if if you piss me off, I go home and shoot you in the balls, because you can. You can

shoot me in the balls. And I still like, I play us from Ka Jansen and I shoot you in the balls. Really, I think it's so funny that you can he queers for Pride Month. This is my gift to you, the information that you right now can get an N sixty four and play as bomb Ka Johansen and Alan Coming and do a hand to hand combat fight slappers only slappers only. Well, well, this is interesting.

How did you feel about this idea that like not a lot of people have on on this side of like you know, Hollywood or whatever, where it's like you have this intergenerational difference of people coming up to you and knowing you from a different thing. Oh, I love it. I think it's great. I mean it's sort of really And then now it's you know, from writing books and stuff, and I love and people say, oh, I love club

coming you know things like that. I really and I used to sort of play a game when I would start trying and guess what was the thing they were going to say when I saw people come up to me, and I got so bad at it, I thought, you know, it's actually quite nice that I don't know, because it sometimes confounds you that some little granny I'll come up and say, oh I saw you know, some crazy independent film, but me doing something. And so I actually like that diversity.

And you can't guess because there are too many things, probably too many things. And then also I think what I was doing was like, oh, you know, like for example, four year old Spike, it's or you know, guy with a kind of iron maid and T shirt along here, it'll be excellent. You know. I was making all these

sort of sort of stereotypical decisions. And then it's actually lovely to sort of be confounded and a lot and you can tell a lot by age, like you know, The Good Wife is obviously a big thing that for years. And also I host you know that what you've got to get them a masterpiece mystery. I'm coming and this is masterpiece mystery and that has a very definite specific demogmograph of older, older white people. Yeah, but but not always you can be confounded. It's it's quite nice. I

like it. I like sort of And also I forget, you know. That's the other thing I realized writing this new book I've got coming out. I had to sort of research myself because I had forgotten so much. And luckily you can research yourself nowadays. You know, it's as possible. And I found out such a lot. But I forget. And that's why my website I really always Matt my assistant, and I always like, we've got to keep the website updated because I want to not forget what I've done,

because I did. I have had very some very embarrassing incidents when I swore blind that I had never worked with like for example, I never worked with William before I thought I love, Oh my god, I would remember he's so great. I would love I see him sometimes at parties and I think it's such next time, I'm just, oh, I'd love to work with him. I had done a film with him and had scenes with them, and I totally forgot you were with Paltrow. You don't do you

know what we're said? You know what I mean? But she didn't remember which films she was in. Yeah, that was spider Man, that was Spider Man. I was an inspider Man. But this is but this is huge, though, I mean, this is like what everybody I hope, I mean not everybody, but like what a lot of people probably aspired to you in terms of like getting having done so much that you forget what you've done, that you forget that you were in a film that you

did scenes with. Willinger felt absolutely. I know, just like in Island. I once I had these friends and they bought this house that belonged to the man who wrote Hello Dolly and everything. What's his name, so, Jerry Harman Herman. So he had this big house in Fire Island. It

was kind of legendary that, you know, Angel Lands. We would go over in the midll sing by the piano and my friends bought it and I spent some time in it, and it was like and they totally redone it, but but there was one room because the entire thing used to be zebra skin, and so there's this little Lou there was just zebra skin walldproop. It was the leftover Jerry Harman Lou and on it on the wall was like an award he got that he'd just forgotten

left behind. And I remember thinking, God, can you imagine like being like having so many awards that one of them is in your loop and you actually move house and forget it. But this is the thing. It's like, I don't know if that means that career isn't as important as we think it is, or if it just means that like it isn't right, Like maybe that's that that's the takeaway year that like you're not defining yourself by like being in a Will and the film movie

No exactly. And I think that, you know, I've I've noticed over the years that there's certain things, a certain markers that you are encouraged to, you know, keep and celebrate, like the first time you're on the cover of a magazine or the first time you're above the title or all these sort of markets and your sort of business side of your work that you and people then send you pictures of things, and so you end I anyway ended up with like thousands of fucking pictures of me,

like framed things, posters of films, and which is nice initially, but then it's let's like, well, what am I going to do with all these things? You know, It's ridiculous, And so then I put oxtional of forgiven the way, and now I realize it's such an interesting thing that now I just I kind of keep just the ones that I like in my little shed my gym shared upstate. And it's actually a really good thing to exercise looking at images of your younger self. It's very keeping. But

I think that is true. I don't define myself by my work. I actually really like my work, but like you know, it's really fascinating. I loved the experience the pandemic gave me, which was to just do do other things and have the time to other things, and I was I was really I think it was one of the happiest years I've had in a long long time. Was was doing, you know, And I think that's that was very heartening to me that I don't I didn't freak out because of work, and I like my work.

But you know, I I think that's also why I'm probably quite good at it. I don't take it that seriously. I care about it, but i'm not. It's not I'm not. I don't get I don't yearn, which I think is a very bad thing to do. I just I keep myself open to the possibility of working with interesting people. But I don't start of think in five years time, I must have worked with you know, sure, blah blah.

I think that's very You've got to try and be in the moment and focus on focus on what you're doing, but also focus on fun as much as focus on your work. Well, even the way you talk about a lot of stuff you've done, it seems like, um, it's not like, um, you're not talking about the the content, but it seems like it's like there was an experience attached to it that you see really treasure, such as your time at the Nude Beach with Ian McKellan like.

And then of course it's an afterthought that X two was the best X men. But the content speaks to itself. It's there, it can be seen there, you can see it, but you don't. We don't know the experience, and that's something that right, you know, it is special for you, it's great and actually know that aside from that, you know, I had fun with you and speak, but that was a terrible film to make. It was really it was

really you know, it wasn't happy experience. There's lots of weird ship going on, and it was with the set was very unhappy place. And I hated it. I hated making it. And so you know there's that as well. And actually I think again that's all the more reason that you should have a good time, you know, the end product. I've done a couple of films like that, Like I really think X two is a great film. And then I did this film Titus with Judy Timoth.

I think it's really a great film. But both those experiences were just horrendous, and I don't think that the the excellence of those films is enough to meet it the bad experience I had. Yeah, I mean it's actually interesting, Like as I work more in the industry, I realized more and more that what's on the screen actually has nothing to do with what the experience was. And you know, you you can see, especially with film and TV, just how much is you know, made an edit and lied

about and you know, things like that. It's just it's just interesting. It's not when you grow up wanting to do this. And I think that's the quicker you find that out the way, the more you get the demystification of the whole thing, you know what I mean. I was that kid, yeah, yeah, and I was that kid that you know, I watched the Oscars and like I really bought into it and like really wanted to did want to be part of the community of people that

I was reading about and watching. And then you grow up and as you become part of the sure you realize that's exactly what it is, and that it is a lot of construct and so that's why it is important to you know, prioritize experience for yourself and life absolutelf.

And then I think what's really lucky about this is that it gets to take you to interesting places and you get to meet interesting people who maybe had that when they were young too, but right, but only when you meet people that are that have figured that out and like seeing all the pepsi cans as we say, you can, can you really figure out how to like

enjoy it right now? I think that's absolutely true. Well I admired, but you guys and your sort of group, and I see it's happening, you know, so it through club coming really is. But this group of sort of young uh writer actor comedians, there's a very strong sense of community and of support I think, with each other.

And that's I thought, I think that's really unusual. I'm not unusual, but it's uncommonly strong and seems really familiar when I look at you lat Well, that's I mean whenever people are like, um, oh well, I mean people will assume that, like you know that that that we will know certain people through um the podcast, But it's like, no, these are like relationships that we've built up over many years where we've seen each other really each ship, like

in like in bar basements in Brooklyn and like, you know, like we like I remember the first time I saw you know, let's just say, like Patty Harrison or Katherine Cohen or like whoever, like we were not performing at the level we were. We we just but we weren't even like even that good grade of performance. We just wanted to get better at it, and we all happen to start at the same you know, water level, and

then now it's just a coincidence. It's a happy, wonderful, fortuitous saying that we're all like in in the same

neighborhood of like of doing stuff. But um, but I think but I was gonna say, like maybe, I mean, I'm not the person to say what um to assign meaning to what you're what you're doing UM these days, but like I feel like club coming is this thing where you are you are community building with with that, you know, it's like your I think so, and I he felt that when we did when the when the pandemic hit, that one of the things that was apparent was that people needed a place to come even if

we weren't opening shows. And so we you know, we try and like doing the Black Lives Matter marches, like some of the staff or like let's keep you know, they suggested, let's make it a safe space people can come and get water and snacks and go to the

loo and things like that are really important too. I realized how important it was just for our core group of both performers and audience that they knew it was still there and they could come and they would be able to feel the same the thing like you know here, when I do it in like at the Spiegel tent in this festival, I say, you know, I'll tell you a bit about Club Coming. I say, we have a motto all ages or genders, or colors or sexualities, everyone's welcome.

Kindness is all and you know, anything can happen. And I think that's a great sort of just let's put that. When you put that out there, I think people, uh, come, it's it's it's manifest itself because people bring that sort of message to it. I really did realize that that's why work sort of so hard early on when everyone was hit financially for all these you know, they kind of got the benefits and things that we made. We had this thing called the Club Coming Community Chest, and

we've got all these hilarious people to donate things. So and that was I think, you know, I really did that because I felt like we do have a community and it's really important to make sure that we look after them and so but if we can't nurture them in the way we normally do by paying them to perform and you know that, yes, then we have to try and you know, you have to kind of think. So it was. It was really and I take it

very seriously that sort of thing. Actually, I'm very concerned about, you know, I'm very conscious of things changing and what's what what's the mood and there's new people and how's that going? You know, the sort of the feel of it. It's really because it's supposed, it's supposed it's reflects me. It's supposed it looks my spirit really, and it does. It really doesn't. It carries the light when you go in there, and like and the show is really popping off,

like it's like a love bomb is exploding. It's so yeah, and I it feels weird, but like I want to thank you for it because it's like a truly like some of my first some of my last year's because I moved to Los Angeles for work stuff. But I I it's I think it's in the top three things. I always say, you know, for me, everyone's like, what are you gonna do now that you're back in New York?

And I'm back in New York for a month, And I always say, like, it's more about people for me that I'm going to see when I come back here, Like I'm always like I always will associate bone with it and our dear friends studio and like our close friends. But it's not having this conversation right now makes me really anxious to get there again because I think it's

I think it's my favorite spot. I mean, I'm so I'm so proud to be like a part of it, and like it's so you're you're oh the time in l A now, uh yeah, And I think that the dream is to sort of bounce back and forth, you understand, but like coast has worked, but yeah, right now, yes, but I mean I'm telling you it's just it's not replicable in l A. What that is and I think even outside of I mean, it's just not replicable any aware.

I mean, I'm sure there are some places, but there was something about a packed room at club coming for a for a comic show, cabaret show, drag show, what have you. But energetically, spatially, there was nothing like it. Just you just felt and it's I mean, this is I don't know, this is a little bit of like a masturbatory thing to say, but like it's where it's it's where I discovered quote Uncoree or met Chloe Fineman who later was like in my who's in my class at S And I was like it was where I

like saw her perform for the first time. It's like, oh my god, who the funk is this girl doing all these impressions, She's incredible. So many people And then now it's like and now and yes, so many people. But it's like like look like it's like it this is the thing, Like but you you saying like, um, you know, all ages, all genders, all all sexualities, A kindness is key, Like hopefully that brings people together. Of

course it does. It's a force in the world and people will will draw themselves to that and then naturally this is what happens. It's it's actually v D hartening in terms of you know, like do you ever do things like you sort of thing I really want to do this, like what you've got to creative visualization? I mean, I guess with with cubcoming, I did create a visually visualization.

And also like you know, when you talk about when something's about to happen and you talk about it in the press or stuff, like that you can sort of creatively visualize in the more um you know, direct way by doing that. But it is really heartening to think that that's that's how it came about. Is that I just that's how I wanted to be and I just

just put that message out to the world. Also, point was I was saying when I did um the other thing we have together coming out Shmiga Dune, I creatively visualized that as well, because I was it was it was it was like, you know, the end of the summer, and I've spent it's been lovely. At the summer, I was up stuck not stuck in the cats girls with my lovely husband, and I was just like, this has been lovely, but I kind of liked a little break, a little break my husband from my from you know,

making dinner every night and blah blah blah. And I've you know, finished the draft of my book. I'm ready to and I'd like to do a show not in America and that kind of a America. And that just showed that it's an ensemble. Don't have to get up every single day and I can and somewhere safe like Knada where the people are kind and there's a plan boom. The next thing, I know, Oh you've got You've been asked to do this hilarious musical homage parody. Thing was

all these great people in Kinada thing. Yeah, I didn't have to visualize more. I can't. Yes, you know it always did it always did? You know. It's so funny, like you say, like you're in l A all the

time now, like there's something happened to me. I think maybe it was the pandemic and also in the move to l A where it's so much more like entertainment industry, like I'm working during the day and I did lose that sort of like New York like Jack, you know what I mean, like and so like it's just kind of um, it's it's it's just fun to remember that that's a thing like putting things out into the atmosphere really does work. I do believe that. Yeah, I know so.

I in my book, I write because I think it's too easy to be down on Eli if you're not if you're not an earlier person, and it's it's one of these places I think that's quite sort of um triggering, or or it's you know, it's sort of what do you call that word? Um, I'm going to see bi polar polarizing, polarizing, polarizing, and that the thing is that I've lovely friends there, I love going there, but I don't ever I've never lived there. I don't want to. And I and and I've write about this. I say

that it's it's kind of like how I am. If you think about Hershey, Pennsylvania, where they make which I do often and Matt Matt loves theme park person, so I love coaster Park. They've got some of the best rober clatures in the world, did they really? And also, are you a big you're a big chocolate person that you know. I don't go there for the chocolate, but

I stay for the chocolate. I always think that l A is similar to must be similar to Hershey, Pennsylvania, because I bet there everybody's talked about chocolate all the time, you know, to me, because it's an industry time. And I think in l A everyone just talks about work all the time. And when you think about like that, it's not so menacing. It's but I just don't want to talk about work all the time. I said, already, I'm not I'm not keen on giggles of actors. That's

like my worst nightmare. So the idea of being in a in an environment where like things like I remember one time this. I was saying this years ago and this waiter came came to me and I was like, he just wanted to focus on my salad, as Martha's chet said, and he said, he said, what, congratulations Allen. I was like, oh, why you know when people say that, you think, what did I win an award? And no one's told me? And he went, oh, your movie made

nineteen million dollars this weekend. And I was like, how do you know that? And I don't you know what? I mean? Like what I thought? It was awful and I'm bringing it up while you were eating? Thank you? Well wait, I mean okay, well, well, Matt and I when we were visiting l A years ago, we met up with our friend, this is Jamie Soalker. But he told us he was like, here's the thing about l A. Everybody loves it. And then we were like, what about the people who hate it? He was he was, they

just don't know that they love it. I don't know yet that they love it. And I'm like that is interesting. Atmospherically, I do love it, like I And when I say atmospherically, I just mean like literal atmosphere, like I love the way I love the weather being the same everything. I don't know what I mean, it's so boring, but like I think, I think that's like, say, what do you say? What do people I mean say nobody would live in

Iceland or things? Do you know what I mean? The thing is I would just go to Iceland then, but in terms of where I live, like I I wanted to be like dry and dry and hot and the same. I get it. I just think it's sort of I don't know, I absolutely understand, but I'd also just think I find it kind of weird that the climate would be the best thing somewhere. I totally, I totally get that. And maybe I'll even agree with you very soon, and I'll turn my ass right around and point myself back

in New York. And it's just that the humanity and you can make you can. It says that, but you can. I love that, actually missing the witness, but I think you can. You have to make your own life in whereas in New York you find it. And then it's just a little more difficult to in Eliot, You've got to it's more it's a well, you know that thing about it's all spread out city. There's the first time I drove in Eliot. So I'm going to find the center of l A. There's not a center. And so

that's the thing. You've got to realize. Everything is more spread and you've got to seek out a life within New York. It just hits you in the face. And I think that's I prefer that, and it's a journey. And that's what's fun about it too, that like you're always gonna have New York memories, Like there's not really l A memories, you know what I mean. Like, but like New York is alive in a way that every day is a curveball. And in l A's yes, you're less of an adventurer. In l A you just are.

But also at the same time, I always think if I lived in early I would probably end up in a gutter with like a prostitute on my face and a needle in my arm. Bad. But you know what I mean, I think that that actually in New York you have there's it's I think it's the slightly repres like the thing that everybody goes to bed so early and gets in eli and everything like that, and you

have to really look for after. I was fun as well, and so it's slightly I don't know whereas in New York that's like a part of living, it's a sort of celebrate part, whereas there it's a little repressed and sort of That's what I mean. I think I would end up in some you know, weird environment. You would swing, you would swing so hard the other way. But I I've never heard someone distill it this way. Where in l A you make your life. In the New York you find it. I think that's the perfect way to

like to phrase it. Um, before we ask you the question about what culture made you say culture was for you. You were talking about sets earlier. I just want to know what was it? What was the set of Josing the Pusycats, Like we need we need some we need to know about our favorite movie. But it was a hut because, um, well the Girls was so young. I

talked to Rozario about this recently. She turned twenty one doing that film twenty one and the Others was about the same age and they were just like these three week things. Actually remember one thing, this thing about work and Elie and everything. I remember it was when when we were shooting that um what do you called Gody Hone's daughter lovely Kate Kate Hudson was on the cover of Vanity Fair because she was in that Cameron Crow film. And I remember the three girls were like, oh, they

were fascinating about this cover. And remember one of them said, gosh, who's her publicist? Like that? And I thought, oh, it was they were. They were already being sucked into that thing. How can I make that happen to me? And so it's interesting, but they were lovely. I remember one time we've talked about Lauren Bicole in the makeup bus, and none of them knew that she was. I thought, that's okay, they were in there, they're in there early. It's not okayah,

I think they were. They're making their actress isn't film anyway, I told them. But my and also favorite thing was like there was one time where a little um melody, the character played Tara Reid, and you know, because at the time she was going out with what's his name, they were engaged. There was a whole joke in the film about that. You know, they was a big hot item. We're all going to go to their wedding after the

film finish. That didn't happen at last any bit Tarda, there was something where we're doing a scene was late. Everyone was a bit tired. Was a night shooting. There was a little bit of conflict going on on the set with the direct one of the directors and the girls, and we got back to make up and they were all being upset about it, and I was like, girls, you just got to let you know, everyone's tired, just like you know, just say okay, I'll do it that way.

I do want to take like that, and then just do it the way you want to, you know, just you know, just you have to kind of take a little bit, but don't make it. Don't make a bad all this stuff. And and Tarda was cris because it's okay for you Ellen. They respect you, but they won't let me give Melody any creativity. Seping you wouldn't let

Melody get any creativity wherever you are. Yeah, that that That movie also features um one of Bond and his favorite performances ever committed to celluloid, which is Parker posey in that film just tremendous. I mean that was just that's the dream piece of casting. I also, I love Parker so much. We had I know, so we were the two oldest people in the film. That was and I showed it and when Parker left, she was finished wrapped earlier. I was the oldest person on the film.

Can you imagine? But thirty five a cool thirty five would be like these fucking like I wouldn't like be that self conscious about me. I'd just be like, no, I'm doing great and these fucking amateurs are figuring it out as well. Yeah, just I went one of these films, yes, but it was it was a Parker was you know, she's hilly idios. I've got something took heart of doing that film, my first Parker, my first Parker posing movie.

And then through that movie I discovered like all the Christopher guest things House of Yes, Like that was like my gateway into like that world of cinema where I was like, oh my god, this is a little like Lane. This is like a little like pocket of of movies for me, And like it took something as like you know, Candy coated as Josey the post a gat which I

still leave is like us like a satirical film. It's saying something about the culture in a way that I didn't was not said at the time, and I still think it has something. And like when we were saying that, so Matt has said a metaphor earlier look for the pepsi cans. It's just literally like what the whole movie is, which is emblazoned branding on everything, and like now, like you know, now we talk about it's like it's kind of a happening thing now to talk about how corporations

are ruining pride. Of course they are, but it's like that was like in the year two thousand, like giving you this thing where every single surface was covered in a logo in a way that's so funny and like ironic. So it was like a idea of it sal phone ust as well, Yes, you know what else is that parodea of itself? Was um the Spice film. Yeah, absolutely, people were so and the reviews of it were so like this is bad. It's like you don't understand, this

is camp. And I feel like at that at that time they just were I think maybe American critics were kind of like unaware of the fact that that was Maybe they just didn't want to give the movie any credit for being camp, or maybe they just didn't I don't think American people understand camp. They're not actually properly

in the way, you know. Yeah, yeah, I mean it's sort of I think people think camp as they don't think of it as wet, to think of it as like someone wearing a feather bow and glitter, and I think that's the thing like that from the literary tradition and the sort and also sort of the repress the idea of a repressed having to repress a message but get the message over using a sort of almost a

hidden language. That's what I think of as cats and that's what American people, I think, you know, just in it's it's I don't mean to bash America, but there's this, you know, irony. There's a bit of an irony bypass in general, which is per me. It's all culture, and I think that it's getting better, and of course in certain pockets it's absolutely there, but it's not as in the mainstream as much as it is in other cultures.

Sell business, we must ask we must ask the question because this will be the latest we've ever asked a question. But we're just having too much of a I'm talking to you. So what was the culture Alan Coming then made you say culture is for me? This was the piece of whether pop culture or general culture around you that sort of moved you in in Alan coming direction.

It was a piece of theater. And it was when I was a very little boy and a theater and education group came to my school and did a play in our dinner hall, and like you know, we all sat on the floor and they did this piece of and it was about the about a historical thing that happened in Scotland called the Highland Clearances, when all the people were cleared off the the hills and sent away by the English. And I really even at that moment, I thought, gosh, I am learning more from this than

we did. Then I got in history class than because I'm seeing it now and it's been presented to me in this way and then and I thought it's amazing. And then I at play time afterwards, I saw them through remember through the fence, the metal grid defense of the play of the playground, looking through it and I saw the actors from the little theater company putting their big hampers of props and things into a van, and I realized they're going off and don't going to do

this at another school. And I was just like, I want to do that. Decided to become an actor right that very moment. How old are you? How are you? It's probably about eight or nine. And guess what the very first job I did, the first professional job I did, I was and it was in the production of Macbeth in Glasgow and I played Malcolm. And we're sort of talking kind of like this about, oh, what was your first sort of thing that you wanted to become an actor?

And I was. I told this story and the lady, the actress called morning Beat He's a brilliant Scottish actress who was playing Lady Macbeth, suddenly went wait, what what was the show about? And I said, Hircus. She went and it was near Dundee. I went, yes, she went, I was in that, and she was. She had been in the very show that I sever Several other actors a couple of other ones actually that and that crazy. That's crazy. I think that people really forget, like whenever

I hear or see that. Um, you know, like a particular education system is doesn't have theater or the kids aren't closed to theater. Like it's what you're saying. It's like some people genuinely like their world can completely expand, their mind can completely expand by seeing that. Bowen and I for several years did children's theater, and you can tell when some of the kids are changed by it. Yeah, yeah,

I love that. And also I think it's been interesting, you know, with the pandemic that in a crisis, artists are the first people that culture turns to to make sense of it, to kind of entertain us, to take our mind so off it, or to raise money, to help raise money for various things. They are arts are the first sort of line of defense, if you like, in a in a crisis, and yet the arts is the first place that they have all the money cut in order to pay for everything. It's really hypocritical. Well

it's just an arbitrary thing. I mean, this is this is the weird thing to bring up. But I feel like to those actors, like that day, it was just another let's say, Wednesday afternoon, do you know what I mean? And you for me and Matt when we would go and do these children's theater shows at schools, would be like, well for us, it's like, how god we had to wake up at like five am today and like hack of it and like but then but then it's like

but then, I don't know. But then hearing you someone like you say this that like you were like truly sparked by a children's theater the moment at your school, I'm like, oh god, it's like you can you will never be able to tell and this is just undoubtedly have done that. You'll have undoubtedly done that to some people. And that's not and even if they don't become actors you would give you'll have changed them forever in a way.

And I think that's you know, we have forget what great It's a pressure, I suppose in some ways, but what a great honor is that you have their job that can actually change people's lives. Absolutely. But I just think, and this is not I don't know why I'm connecting these two dots in terms of like cultural like like arts funding not getting what it should in this country

or any country. But it's like because it's something that like people, there's no like number on it because people can't like a sign like yeah, we want something results. But then but then it's like, well, if if you were able to track like how many kids want to go into theater after like the theater trip comes through this school, then maybe it's like, oh well then maybe like I don't know, it's like it's such a it's a hard thing because it's it's because it is so arbitrates.

Like it's like I was talking to Study today, are are very good friend? Study? We were like, you can't describe funny, like like she's like she's like she's like fucking professional comedian or just a writer for years and years and then talking to me about this, like one of her collaborators were just like you can't. You can't define what funny is, and therefore people get into arguments

all the time about like who who's funny? Yeah, it's a terrible thing that you know, I think and and and and like some cultures we absolutely need to see it on paper to make sense of it, whereas you know, like where I'm from, it's it's people understand the value of it. Yeah, Like the first Minister of Scotland quotes like she's a big reader, for instance, and she talks about books. Actually something says, here's a great book I've just read blah blah blah blah. Imagine that coming from

an American politician. It's it would be incredibly rare. And then and also they would be criticized for taking time off to read a book probably, you know. And then and also but just like she's something you know, she's quotes poetry sometimes when she makes speeches and things like that. This the idea that language and and and culture and that way is so much more into the mainstream of how people think, and there's a reference point. It's not something that's seen as something we do for fun or

something that's a little frivolous. It's actually much more valued in the very core of a society. And that's the problem. I don't know how you how you change that. You just have to tell yourself to give it to people, you know, that's the thing that we've got to be told.

How you can't and if anyway, are certing that you can't blame people for being homophobic or racist, if the government of the day is homophobic and racist, because they are the people that are supposed to be leading you and explain to you what is decent and how to behave and so I think we've always got to That's why it's so depressing right now that all these great things that Biden wants to do is not going through because of this gridlock. Not awful, man, it won't let

the voting thing go through. I mean, it's just the political system in America is so it seems so intent on just staying on stasis. As you know, modus up und a lot of Latin words in one sentence, what we love Joe mansion and this is just kidding. Yeah, the worst, literally the worst, and unfortunately he is president of the United States. It feels like um, but because because it doesn't matter who is while that fucking asshole

sits there. And also Kirsten cinema is no better and that I don't care, I don't care how blue or hair is. Um, that's actually it's more patronizing. Yeah, it's actually also I'm sorry it looks bad. I'm not good about her. Die job is bad. Not to remark on the looks of whatever, not whatever. She just looks bad anyway.

But I will say, like, it's so it's so crazy that you say that, like people wouldn't be this way if it wasn't if the government wasn't like filling their heads with this because like when we do when we do, when we used to do these shows all the time as story parts was the name of the company, it was like all the five and six year olds were my favorite because they were the most untouched by by anything.

And then you could see when they got to like eight, nine, ten, something started to turn, especially in the boys, like um, something was turning. It was just and you saw that little glimpse of like I want to have fun, but but I can't. I can't know what else to you know what else? Yeah, and you know what else to?

When when the kids are really little, when when little boys are really little, they lay in each other's laps, they hold each other, they touch each other, and they're they're very tactile and they're very sensitive and emotional and pop in and they're screaming laughing when like when like something gay happens on stage, and by nature of Bone and I being on stage, many gay things happened. And sort of like us in a wig, like yelling at each other about like which spoon was magical? And which

one wasn't like um stupid queer stuff. And like it does, it does. It does change when you can tell the parents or they don't have a filter. Yeah, and then there then there's something happened, I think, and it is a male thing that I think they're told. They're just

very quickly you realize that that's not acceptable. There's things not you know, there's things that are not are expected of you, and there's things that are not acceptable, and it's immediately it's a it's a very sort of about manning up in a way, and sports and things become very polarizing in that way too. And I think it is really interesting and it's always magical when you meet people who have escaped that who are also straight, you

know what I mean. I think I'm all I love a straight boy in touch of these sort of femi queer side. I think it's just the best thing ever.

And I and I I think that's actually something again about your your generation and your group that I've seen is that that is much that's much more integrated that everyone everyone has a sort of much more integrated kind of group of friends and it's much more and I think you you know, you you lot, because you always grew up with the internet, didn't you know, there was never any time because we were we were in about first second ord grade when it really starts to pop off,

right right, So that's when you're a little too So. Um, I think you've always had access to so many more options in all sorts of ways, and you've grown up with like at the click, at the you know, three clicks away, having so much more information and so much more understanding of things. And I think that's I mean, there's obviously downsides to that as well, Um, but I think actually it's made you a more friendly and open generation. I mean, well, let's hope so but then yes, let's

let's just hope so. But that's but now, but that's that's that's very um, that's very stupid you. I mean, I just think tearing hearing that talking about these five year olds, it's like or these kids and the turn it's like masculinity is self harm. Like that's that that that is what I truly believes that like like starting to like saddle yourself with an idea of how you

should behave as a man. It's just like it's just like, I mean that is just like gender nonsense that ends up like ruining people's lives, you know, literally, you know that my fellone of my favorite memories ever. This is the last thing I'll bring up story parts. And I bring it up because Henry was there, because Henry Copersky was also a story pirate. He wasn't a performer, as we know, Henry is more comfortable behind the keys. And he was like just he just texted me and said

to send you, send you regards, regard regards. You tell them I send my regards back. That's how you know our relationship is over. There's a little applause emoji. Then I accept his regards. I'm in a text later. One time, one time we were at a show. This is like very early on before we were dating. And I think, um, we started dating very shortly after this. But like this

little boy. The teacher brought up this little boy and after the show and he had this book of pictures that he had drawn that he had like tied to that are like uh taped together, and his teacher was like, you know this is so and so he's one of

my he's one of my very special students. And he he he wants you to show he wants to show you this book that he wrote and illustrated, and he just sat there and like went through the book, and I'm like, this is a creative kid, like you know, and it was very clear, like a young young kid had done this. But to go to the length to make up sucks. It's fucking sucked. I mean the art scarbage. But now I'm kidding, but I don't remember the art

it might have. But but like the fact that he was like, I'm ready and willing and able to prevent this and I'm presenting art and I want to create art. It just makes me feel like I want every kid. I want every kid to have access to all that stuff because we don't know the genius that we could be getting. And also we should say, it's so unfair some of these schools that we went to that obviously

have no money. And I feel I just it's it was, it's just so clear that so much in New York needs to change, and so much everyone needs to change, because the all these kids should have a chance to like express themselves creatively and be exposed to stuff like you were. Also just to have like you know, it's

good for you. It's actually it's just obsessed with like who's the next you know, blah blah, who is going to be the next Vincent van Go, Who's the next Mariah carry Actually, just the very fact of doing it is good and healthy and as a as an important thing we should do. Like keeping fit for our bodies, we should also keep fit with our minds and our

hearts and our imagination. That's what the arts is for. God, I sound like a commercial, but the thing I always remember is when you put Vincent van Go and Mariah Carry on the same level, and I thank you. I thank you for that as like as like like I really thank you for that. What do you what do you think? I don't think so, honey. I think we should move on and think so honey. This is our segments in our show where we each take one minute to rail against something in the culture or something that

is happening to us. Matt, do you have a topic. I do, and it's sort of fresh on my new newly New York mind. Okay, great, I will uh time you. This is Mount Rogers is I don't think so, honey, and his time starts now. I don't think so, honey, that the New York subways finally got figured out the second I fucking left. All of a sudden, I come back, and you can use your goddamn debit card to get in. I don't have to get a metro card anymore. Metro cards are a thing of the past. I don't think so, honey.

How come I used to have to suffer with that little piece of paper that I have to hold on to for a month, and if I lost it, I would lose the at the time insurmountable amount of money I had paid to get that. Now you can use your goddamn debit card or credit card. I don't think so, honey. Also,

there WiFi almost everywhere, on every single stop. Do you know how many times I've been crying stuck in a subway between like the fucking this and then that on like the truly pits D train, trying to get somewhere and unable to communicate. Now communication is like water, everyone can have it. I don't think so high. I have to tell you, New York, you're trying it with maybe the humidity, but you're pulling me in with this new subway system. Things are looking good. I don't know. Maybe

I do think so, honey, and that's one minute. It's ever been like if there's a lot that's going on, that's like I'm like, what the fund is going on? But the subways have gotten pulled together. Hey, thank build a Blassi for that. Just kidding, I um, I think I think it's great that there's WiFi and every station. It's like it just makes the way. It's we're one step closer to making like internet usage like thing that

everyone can have for everyone. Yeah. I always think that this when when I come to hotel and you have to to pay for the WiFi, think discusting, disgusting. It's just really like charging for that something that you could give free to everyone. Yes, I just ridiculous talking and especially in a swanky hotel and then they charge if the Internet I'm that year are they doing that? Where you're staying right now in the cave hotel is free? God bless I'm telling into via the free access or

I would be building you. No, it's no, it's all for me. It's like worse when like it's like a shitty hotel, Like I'm at a study hotel and you're like it's like four you get born all night. Yes, where does any holiday in get off charging you four for WiFi? It's like you should be so lucky and I've checked into this establishment. But it's like, I suppose we don't make food call You remember when you used to make calls on the phone and you're probably had

mobile phones. They must have made a lot of money from that and they lost all that, so we can charge the internet. It's the same with like you know, on planes, now you're not allowed to take emotional support animals. You can still take dogs, you just just have to pay for them. This is being a big change. People would abusing it. But it's also I think of thing that airplanes are like, how can we make some fucking money?

So we'll just stop doing that? And you know you can still I could still go with my emotional support animal, la la, but I'm absolutely waiting to do that. Yeah, but not everyone can. That's and that's what everyone can. That's rough makes an inconvenient. The WiFi on planes too was a nightmare. That's truly expensive. We haven't progressed. We

haven't progressed on that front. And like several years and about like at least I would say seven years, there's been no progress on the in flight WiFi front still still bad. It should be faster anyway, anyway. UM, so that's mine for now, Um and yang? Are you ready with your I don't think so, honey, I am. I've got one. It's a little it's a little like whatever, but it's just just just it is what it is.

It's a little whatever, but like it is what it is, and that Um, we are going to start bow and yang. This is yours. I don't think so, honey. This week and your time starts now, I don't think so, honey.

Transcribing likes and ums in any trans script form, but specifically interviews, specifically interviews with me, I'm not going to be made to sound like a bumbling fool because I'm actually trying to find the words in order to properly convey the idea that I'm trying to communicate, specifically when I'm doing a long day of press. For that I'm

willing and happy to do for Hot White Heist. But if you're catching me at the end of the press day and I've I'm a little too tired and I'm having trouble articulating myself, please do me the courtesy of cutting out the likes and the arms and the dusts and the filler words. And we all have filler words in every culture. I don't think I don't think it's a mark of unintelligence that you say like or um, but it just it makes the reading of the interview

very fragmented, very disorienting. It just doesn't make for a good reading experience in terms of absorbing information for the reader. It just kills it. And I'm not gonna name the company. I'm not going to name the publication that did this to me today, but they did it to me, and otherwise it would have been a great interview that read great on paper. Well, that's one I will say. Sometimes I do use a like or an arm for comedic effect, but it's very clear when that, it's very clear when

that's true and ironic use, yes, exactly. And I was just Alan, I was trying to tell him about the damn show and they and they just kind of broke it up into all these and like, you can string it together, I promise you can. You can. You can edit it make it sounds somewhat cohesive. Do you know what I hate when you do that? Like sometimes you know how something should do like, do you do that when you go? I often say I don't want to

do the interview. You'll can send me the questions on an email and I will then do a voice love love that I do a voice memo and I send it back to What I think is despicable, and it's happened a few times, is that they published the voice memo without asking make an audio file. Instead of transcribing what you said, they do an audio file and put it out into the world. That that's invasive. I don't

like that at all. So it's very invasive. Exactly. It's like my I don't I actually have and I don't think, so, honey, might like to do one. I don't know it. You actually required, you're required to do one. We're not putting this out unless we get and I don't think I have I have it. I have it. This is alan comings I don't think, so honey, And as time starts now,

I don't think so, honey. Is that I hate when people say things to you and they mean it to be an insult, but they're actually seeing something that's actually true. Like when people I remember, like a few years ago, I hosted the Tonys and I wore a short suit like a pair of shorts. Thank you. It was a good look. And and the and they saw the designer who had didn't They sold out the next day. It

was a big thing. Well that Frank Rich. I will name him in New York magazine Who And Frank Rich, of course was the theater critic for the New York Times, you know, like the butcher bloody. Anyway, he said to me, Alan coming looks he thinks he's being youthful. He just looks middle aged. Guess what, I am fucking middle aged? Frank Rich? Why are you insulting me with something that's true? And it's also when people say to you you're I go, of course, I'm a wanker. I masturbate regularly. Why do

you say to me? Yes? Why are you saying that as an insult? You do it too. I just think we should all look like when we're going to use a pejorative, and we've got to make sure the pejorative is a terrible thing and not the truth. I don't think so, honey. One more like Frank bitch? Am I right? That's rule culture number six? More like Frank Bitch. Also, Frank Rich as a theater critics should have something more like pointed and sophisticated to say, then you look middle eight.

They are not necessarily sophisticated theater critics. It doesn't matter who would they write for, Okay, because we could also name more names. But there have been some flop theater critics. Yeahah, I obviously struck a chord in some way with them that it was by my presence and my not conforming to something. But I was just like, that's a stupid thing to say. I'm middle and I'm not just wating. Shorts to not mid laser were in hurt because I

think it looks nice. Fucky exactly. You get to wake up every morning and b Allen coming and he has to wake up every morning and be frank Rich Oh my god, bitch. Yeah, I think I think, yes, an insult is not that insulting if it's just like accurate in a way that is not pejorative. It's mean, yeah, yeah, it's meant. It's me, but it's not it's thoughtless because it's not even like do a better insult. I'm here for it, you know what I mean. I think there's

nothing better than a clever insult. Yeah, make an effort to case it in like some an effort. Yeah, I'm One of my favorite Trump things was when he came to to to Scotland. I saw these people and there was a man holding up a sign and it said Donald, everyone thinks you're a bare end. And I just thought that was the best thing ever. Do you know what bell end is? No? What is that, dick? It's like

you know that, yes, gesticulation. And the other thing there was a lady when he first came during the campaign, and it was the when the Scottish uh know, when exit happened. He actually flew to Britain and he was in Scotland at his thing and he said a great result for Scotland we got and actually Scotland had voted to stay in Europe and the rest of Britain and vote. So you got it all wrong in many ways, not surposing me. But there was two things that made me

laugh so much and made me very proud. One was that these people had hired a Marry actually band to be played right beside his golf course, right so he had to pass of Mary actually had to get into And there was a little lady who's this comedian actually Jenny good She was holding a sign that she'd made, so she looked like a little lady with a little

cardboard piece of cardboard and she's painted. And I said, Trump is a count on the thing right, and there's a policeman coming towards are going, I'm sorry, darling, you're gonna have to do you know. It was just fantastic. And then we were later at the bath to awards and Scott and I was getting one of My mom was with me, and the lady who had held up the sign was there, but she was all used up and had her makeup on in here and I didn't

recognize her, and she went, oh, Alan, it's Jenny. I was like, oh my gosh, and she went you don't remember, and the Trump is a count, lady, And I was like, oh, it's so nice to see you. And then my mom was, Mom, this is Jenny, and I remember Trump is a count, and she went to remember Trump is aunt remember, Oh my goodness, I do, of course the count. That this

actually is so funny. What I wanted to tell you when you were telling your Ian McKellen story right in Balso involves Henry that we went to Europe like on like for like a week and a half, like years ago when we were dating and we went to England and we were in London and we were we came out of our hotel. I think we were like finishing up a blunt. We're walking down the street finishing a blunt and a hundred yards Yeah, I know, he's yeah,

he learned. He didn't learn it from me, but he got much much better at being quote unquote Henry from meeting some tips on joint. I tell you. So we were we were like, we were like finishing one and about a hundred yards in front of us, there was this guy who sort of was like in the in the visage of um Ian McKellen, And I said, finished that before we see Hell he and McKellen up there and we laughed, We laughed, walked up. It was he would have loved it. I was like, I was like, wow,

I'm telling you weird. We've just checked into the hotel, walked down on the street. I was like, yeah, McKellen over here. It was. It was you creatively visualized them, man, there we go create a visualization title about title of that. Well, this is truly an auspicious episode. Overall, but a wonderful ending. This was really wonderful. We're gonna let you go on this plane with Henry. I know. I'm just to go

and have an experience, another lovely experience. It's been so nice to talk to you every really really enjoyed it, and lovely to finally meet you properly. Matt. We're not likewise, I mean, I can't tell you you're you're such a I mean that they throw the word around, but you are an iconomy everything you've done, everything, you are, everything you're gonna be. Seriously bless you, bless you. I love I love the way the lights going down behind you in Long Eye. The lights are going out all over

Long Island. You know there's a beautiful song the lights and Long Island. Just kidding that doesn't exist. But we'll get Henry on the keys and the keys we end up every episode of the song. Matt, Sure do, let's let's do it. What dude do? What did you do? Shake it off? R? Maybe crazy? You know if I could I do anything for you? What is the last len for the song? Please don't ignore me because for me, because you know why I adore you? Well, my fairy

Andryus is really gone. It's amazing. For the rest of that song, listen to the Josie and the Pussycats soundtrack starring Alan Coming. Thank my gosh, thank you so much.