“I’m The Party” (w/ Amy Poehler)

Look, may oh, I see you, my ow and look over there is that culture. Yes, goodness, lost cult.

Dang dong lost culturistas calling get into it, Mayhem in the desert, Mayhem in the desert merch my favorite color of the color that works best for me and my skin tone, neon. I can't tell if you're joking, because Matt is one of our olive toned legends, and you really must cherish this fact about yourself. I can I say, as a platonic person in your life, here we go. You looked really good this weekend?

Shut up? Were you looking at my photos? Scantily clad? I sort of went there in my photos.

You could have withheld from posting, and yet you want to And one of these sort of fringe things that happens, one of the fringe consequences that sometimes your friends go, oh, sometimes your friends get a little chubb for you. It's actually rule of culture number sixteen. Sometimes your friend friends get a little chubb for you. Well, thanks, awkward? Wait, can I say lefty for you?

Though? Because I've went and I went to weekend one, We're going to weekend two. Yeah, it's going to be twenty degrees colder in a good way. It's going to be. Yes, it's going to be in the mid seventies for my legend. Oh, the god said, it's Bowen Yang's first Coachella. Cool it, dad, all the earthquake today. Heard about this when I was driving back, couldn't feel a thing because I was gunning it in the hov and you were you, you were bouncing on that thing that you couldn't even Sometimes you

We were we were in Palm Springs the last time we felt an earthquake.

That one.

Matre Jahari was sitting next to me and was there.

We were stoned.

And we were at the Tropicana eating tropical I'm sorry, eating dinner full on earthquake. Yeah, I was eating like my chicken piccata or whatever the fuck. And then I was like, Mitre Juhari is shaking her ass in this booth, what is going on? Which was unlike her, She usually just hits very still, eat, very.

Still an eat.

And then we realized in the commotion at the restaurant that it was an earthquake.

The loco motion Loco Motion. Kylie was not at Coachella. She's everywhere else. She's everywhere else.

It was the New York Gay Night last week, the Kylie Minogue concert, and I was going to try to go, but we were at work.

And I've seen our accident nineteen times in the last year. And that's not to say it needs to be an accent for me to see Kylie Minogue. It just so happens everywhere I am. Kylie MINOGUEZ. That's amazing thing. Oh, that's so nice. You must understand how important Kylie. She's important to the culture. She's invited on the pod. We would have a great conversation with Kylie, starting with the Local Motion and going all through her career. Just to

She was making coffee, stirring her monk with a knife.

It's a knife. It's a knife period period. So this is a big day.

Bo She's already podcasting royalty number one in the land, not even a month into the game and she's number one in the land. Good hang on Spotify. Hey, Joe Rogan, shut up, get bent over, pull it. It is fantastic. Just as the title suggests, it's a good hang. We'll talk about the format because there are some innovative things you thought you couldn't innovate in the podcasting space. No, you haven't met our guests. Yeah, restless like Tor's back. One of my favorite live comedy shows in the last

The blueprint of two people doing comedy literally it had never been anyone before Carol Burnett and Julie Andrews. Who that's my example, gay man, Julie Andrews and Carol Burnett is like, that's so funny. Like you think of them as like the comedy icon, but.

We forget about them as comedy duo icon Yeah, you know what I mean.

They turned it. You know what we need to do. We need to do Avid and Costello meet the Monsters. But Matt and Bowen meet the monster. Yeah, I'm pitching this to Universal. Have us meet the wolf Man. I'm serious. This is a film franchise. This is Matt and Bowen meeting the Fracula. Meet the bride of Frankenstein, Victoria Frankenstein. We're coming for her. Have you heard about Victoria Grant Frankenstein, the great granddaughter of Well, let's ask her after we

Yes, and she she mixed up with Lisa Frankenstein the Diablo Tody movie.

Okay, but have you heard about Victoria Frankenstein? Yes? I think so. She basically so, there's the new theme park in Universal Studios in Orlando. Epic Universe, and there's a the Dark Universe, which is sort of like all the

She's like domb energy, like why I got it covered? And then yeah, she's in over her head.

No, And this just goes to show you, like women dom, we wanted to know, should women be in charge? That's what we're here to talk about. The answer was.

Maybe maybe, maybe for a chance.

I think because it's a theme park ride and something's gonna go wrong, people are gonna have a lot to say. Everyone leaving is all those Florida people leaving, Like, well, I.

Know you guys are big theme park people.

I am real not, so this is where you and Tina sort of go.

In fact, I just did a show on Orlando and she was very excited to get me to go on the rides, and I did not want to go on the rides. I'm not a theme park person, all right, Sorry, I know it's.

The first of all, we are the ones who should probably take a seat right reaching Our guide was talking about you too. Wait, okay, was it samm Yeah?

Lovely and he he had the best time with you.

We had the best time with him, and he was He was really a classic. He was the perfect prototype of what you want that person.

Oh yeah, Disney World is overwhelming. Oh yes, one of the and too many like too far.

Away, too far away to spread out. You spread out a lot of the.

Same images, kind of like being projected at you from like Plato's cave.

You know what I mean. You're like, this is this an illusion? It's not, it's real, Like you have to come out.

It's I'm also at an age where I don't want to be shook anymore. Like I don't want to be I don't like being nauseous. I don't like the lack of control. It definitely feels like I never get to the It's like when people say when you get a runners high, it never happened. That's what it feels like at those theme parks, which.

Is like, are you feeling it? And you're like, I'm so sorry, I'm not.

I don't know, do you know what's the what's the thing that I never realized about all theme parks until I brought a friend who pointed it out. And then I can't hear it every time. The music never stops. It's always D D D. And if that's how it is in my brain all the time, I think maybe maybe we share that with Tina, but like, it never stops being adventure music in my brain. And Greta was like, it doesn't stop, does it? It never stops. I was like, oh, I guess not.

And Dratch and Tina and I were all together and they went and had dinner at Epcot Mexico and I was supposed to meet them and they texted me and they were like, you would hate it here dot com And I was like, friends, real friend.

I literally know where they went, because those guides have a place they take us. And then there's there's an and there's a Neil Patrick Harris cocktail. There's a Neil Patrick Harre's cocktails in a doogie howser cocktails and I did love it.

Neil, I'm sorry, Rocks, that's okay. You guys are normally so aligned on your activities on tour.

Yeah, we're pretty we we do like very similar things. We go to Bloomingdale's, we like get us buy a sweater, we like have you know we watched like we got to watch the White Lotus finale in our hotel together and that was really fun. And yeah, we do like simple like we're.

Like, ooh, like, did you see there's like a place.

For croissants around the corner. We'll go get one. That's about it. But yeah, this one we were not aligned.

That's okay, that's okay. But they knew that the Mexican place was not your That is.

What a real friend.

Don't you feel like a real friend knows, don't come here.

Real sometimes says you're not invited for your own good. That's a real culture number thirty. A real friend sometimes says you're not invited for your own good.

We'll talk about this idea. Do you feel like your life is scored? Because I'm watching the Pit now and I'm loving that. It's not love the Pit.

I love that. I gotta get into the Pit, I say.

We wrote a parody of The Pit called The Ditch, and it was East London. It took place in Shortage medical just me Ago and John Ham speaking in East London accents, and it was it did not do great address because no one understood what we were saying.

So that's sometimes you got to wait for the culture to catch up. I feel like the people are just now talking about the pit.

Yes, yeah, I feel like TikTok loves a pit. My TikTok loves the pit.

But I mean, I look, Noah Wiley, I've been a no stand for twenty I mean I've I watched the entirety of Ear three times.

That was your show.

I watched it again during the pandemic, and then I watched it in when it came on. I used to be doing like improv at night and waiting tables. That was it, And I would smoke a bong at like seven o'clock and watch er reruns Let's Go because it used to be on like TNT, right, and then like go to work or go to a comedy show. And so I feel like I've known Noah forever.

Yeah, And to see him back in Scrubs has to be surreal.

Yeah, And you know, doctor Robbie's not in scrubs. He's got audio, he has a hoodie.

Why I need to watch the Pit? He's you know it's up. Yeah, but it's so good. It's so good a bong. Huh you were for real?

I used to Yeah, that was back, you know.

God, let's see ninety I was living in the East Village, so I was twenty six maybe.

Very similarly too old to know. My our friend Dave had a bong probably until we were twenty seven and then twenty eight, and then it broke, which is the only reason we stopped using it. But I couldn't believe how high I We get to watch Homeland, like fully, Claire Dane's having a very real breakdown, Like we have to get her in that chair at some point and be like, how did you survive? Because she's shaking and

Actually, when I was coming up here in the elevator, there was a gentleman, a gentleman, a nice young gentleman, and a young a chart with all this red string and they and it smelled so much like weed.

They really really reeked of weed. And I was.

Like, oh, I thought to myself, oh weed, remember that, Like it's been so long and I just had that. It was like nostalgic.

Yeah, we might be hitting that developmental time now between the two of us.

Well, I don't know, I don't know. I was so back, Oh yeah you were. Well, actually it is it gets What I like now is that there's so it's such a science now that you can kind of know exactly what it is. Yeah, yeah, I'm yeah.

That was a different time, and I felt like I had no real responsibilities. Even though I felt like my life was overwhelming, I didn't have a lot of responsibility. So it was like, okay if I was a little stone. But now I don't think I could handle it not anymore.

I think my ideal trip, that my ideal trip is what you and I have connected on, which is what you've talked about in the last time I saw Wrestless Slug, which was going to Iceland one of your sons or both of them.

Yeah, with one of my sons just enjoying, just getting high off of nature. Yes, how about that.

Well, I also think that I've gotten to a point where, I mean I don't barely drink anymore. Where I know this sounds super cheesy, but actually being conscious, like actually just being in the moment is like is like a high is a win because I'm always future tripping or I'm always thinking about what I just said or did, and I just feel such less personality hangover in general

And I stopped drinking right before.

The pandemic and was really grateful that I didn't really do it during it. And now it's not a it's not I'm not in a program or anything, but just like every once in a while, maybe have a thing, but I.

Don't really need it, and it feels very good yea. Honestly, whenever I take my like six weeks, I feel like, Wow, this is the new me. But I had over. I don't know what weeks. I don't know what it is about the past two years. But maybe it's just mid thirties where I'm just like sobriety maybe and then i'm and then and then like that all goes away. I'm like, nah, not for me. Yeah, I do think I can. If I can look to the future, I can see it for myself. At some point I can see it.

Alcohol is poison, that's yeah, but it's okay. You know, you can have a little poison, like just like sugar is poison. You can have but like it can't sugar. It's all poison. Yeah, but I think, especially as a woman of a certainty, you do start to feel the poison a little bit more. The poison really turns on you. Yeah, and just you don't get the same kind of thing anymore.

It goes away?

Is it the microplastics in our brain as well? Yeah, I'm sorry to bring this up.

Are you worried about microplastics?

We were thinking of writing an update about because this thing came up in last week. This New York Times piece came out about microplastics. The equivalent of a spoon is in your head? Is it all of our brain?

No? Stop?

The equivalent of you guys haven't heard this, The equivalent of a plastic dairy Queen's blizzard spoon is in our brains and little granules.

And there's really nothing we can do about it. Yeah, come on, First of all, you can't tell me that we're not better off than generations are gone. We drink water? How about that? Well? That is they didn't back we.

Did not drink water growing up about water and ever, are you being serious?

Yes?

In school, no one made us drink water. No one talked about water. Water was not a thing like you would go to the water fountain and you would drink like you you would drink and.

Drink because you didn't realize.

No water bottles, you didn't have water. Like maybe at a soccer game they would have water.

Maybe, but it was like Gator. We never checked. I never said did you drink water? They never brought water.

There was never. Now I'm obsessed with yes, do you have one of those things, those jugs that says the time of day?

I did have that, but and it was positive reinforcement, like you're doing it, you're doing great, You're almost there or whatever.

But now Molly Shannon had one of those on the you know, she was like, isn't it great? Isn't it Greative reminds me I love it drink water to talk about how great it was? Something that's just so great about it. I'm saying, No, I am.

I have a basic bitch like White Girls Stanley that I love because I like to skip it like a like a Durbil, like I like the strong.

This is the second episode in a row that Gerbils have come up. There's something in the culture. Oh shit, guinea pigs road in set large having a moment. Right, No, but that's what I'm saying, is like when I was brought up, it was not water on the table. I'll tell you what. There was never a coke, a diet coke and a sprite two liters each.

Don't forget about milk, babe.

I was just gonna say, we we shared this thing where we were. We came up when milk was king you, you were not gotting, that's for sure. You would chug a glass of milk at least once a day. They said too. There was a time they were saying too. It was like Cindy Crawford on the cover of whatever the fuck with her got milk mustache, being like, if

Or not only have we not forgotten about it, but as a woman of that age, all my friends are getting bone density.

Tests and DEXA scams.

And we are and everything is coming home to roost because a couple of things you get.

I didn't know this.

You get all your calcium before the age of thirty. Number one.

Number two, if you are a fair skin like myself, you don't get enough sun, you don't get enough vitamin D.

Vitamin D you should be taking it. You're pretty screwed. Yeah, you guys might be, Okay, I.

Know, but but and also there's these things in LA that I'm obsessed with that I want to go to which are like, uh, they're they're like salons for people who have osteopenia, which is pre osteoporosis, where you just you know, you have to do heavy lifting.

Now like now I have to lift.

Weights, So you have to do a lot of weights.

Yes, and so you have to take your calcium and you have to do weights. And so there's like programs where it's like you do leg presses, you do whatever, and it's just designed for women my age who are smart enough to get their bone density tests and they're like, I have a little bit of you know, osteopenia in my hips. I need to do leg presses. Wow, so too, I know a lot about osteoporos.

They're penia clubs.

There's penia and osis or penia and porosis. So yeah, one is pre one is you got it? Yeah, and there's things you can do, but you kind of like, you know, we're our bones stop growing at like eighteen.

Yeah. Well, when I started working out like more seriously a few months ago, my trainer literally said it's great that you start now because at thirty five your bone density is completely gone, and then by thirty seven you lose any metabolism you ever had. And I was just like going acrossside, like oh.

No, oh wild that as a woman, you go through being like a sex object and then maybe a mother, and then maybe like menopause, and then they're like and on your way out, you need to eat forty five grams of protein a day and lift very heavyweights or you're all your bones will break.

If you don't turn into a monster.

Now it's like you got it, and you're like what what You're like, this can't be true.

I can't.

I have to go to the gym and lift the heaviest I've ever lifted.

Hey, what if we shuffle the order? What if you started low bone density? Yeah, then you become a sexy or no. I think it'd be fun to end on incredible style.

That would be incredible.

I mean things are changing, but you know, can you do I'm sure you can do push ups?

Right?

So they say women need to be able to do like ten or eleven push ups, real push ups day, and you got just like okay, well I'll try.

It's hard.

Are you saying these are clubs specifically for OSTEOPI women.

Yeah, they're like physical therapy.

An I agree because my age, I'm the youngest oldest person I see, and that you like it, yes, okay.

Thirties and forties are a little tricky because you're like, I'm not as young as it used to be, but I don't feel old, and nobody like old people dismiss you. They're like, you're thirty whatever, like you know, but when you're in your fifties, you're not young, right, and young people do not think you're young no way.

Fifty is like a nightmare to them. That wakes them up in the middle of the night. But you're you feel young and old people are like, so you're the youngest oldest person you.

Mus say, and please please shut me up.

If this sounds patronizing in any way, I feel like this current crop of fifty somethings is still aspirational to me.

Oh agree, I think I would rather.

Be living your life, Honest to god, I would rather be going to Bloomingdale's and museums and things every day on tour than the bullshit that the thirty thirty year old school.

We just did that. We had that when we were and we were in Berlin. We went to Bergheim and we were there. We got we went at like Saturday at two am, thinking there was going to be a line. No.

We we soared in there like had a time with friends with acquaintances. We have have been in that club for forty eight hours. Yeah, well you know people that have been there for days. Like, let's see how long we last. We left after our four.

It was like maybe five or six. And it wasn't because it was just like not it was. It was great. We were the best time, but we were like, oh, you know what, we'll go home, we'll catch some disease. We'll come back later. I text Bowe, I'm like, guys, say something, what if we didn't go back? What if? And then we walked to a museum and walked back because we realized we had to pay? So what do we do that afternoon? We walked to the museum and walked back, didn't even go into the museum.

I'm here to tell you that if you enjoy that now, the future is very bright, because best decade yet for me, fifties by far, most decade, way better.

And also I have to say to your point, bo, when.

Like women my age or the age of in our fifties, it used to be kind of like maiden mother Crone. Those were the those were the maiden mother Crone, right, And now I think that we've managed to carve out our generation. My generation has carved out a step before Crone. And it's kind of like I'm calling it like boss

I think it's just a full supplanting of crone.

Well there is I kind of what crone means is like wisdom and you know, like medicine woman.

But it's a tough word. It's a tough word.

It's a tough word, but it's a word that I associate with sex and the city. Oh, there's the theory that they each represent the four crones and like classical.

I didn't know there were classical chromes. There were there, there's like the four crones. And they were like, is it Shakespeare's crown? They're like, yeahs crones women. No one knew, No one knew. They didn't have the words for it. Back then, Amy, he was always bloated and cron.

We should call it like like like medicine woman.

Diva diva Wait, diva? Is this is this extra step that you're talking about? Okay, it's literally diva? Yes, Yeah, I'm wondering something about you too, though, about like like you being like I can't wait to get to Bloomingdale's Like, but you guys also like share the fact that for a long time, you guys did entertainment's most difficult job. So did you feel like that like socially also was like after that, on the other side of that, you were like, okay, you also had.

The kids, But I didn't have kids when I was at SNL And I cannot believe the way I socialized, Like SNLZ is such crazy extroverted social job. Right, you see hundreds of people like during the week, and then you have to do the show, and then you have.

To host, the host, the host exactly.

Then you have to go to the party, which I know is like, oh, go to a party, but it is still a work function, even as fun as it is, and I cannot believe, like it is so much energy, yes that I can't believe I did it.

I really and I'm glad that I was younger when I did it.

I'll just never forget because I told you this when we first met. But I was there. I was a stand by kid, so I would wait on the standby lines and I would go and then I'll never forget.

That was really fun, really fun it had to be, and very exciting and just kind of felt Yeah, it felt like there was a feeling during that whole time. Remember when we thought that was a crazy election. Yeah, but like there was a feeling that whole time of just the audience was really paying attention. Everything was and when you're really pregnant, giant pregnant, you have a ton of power because people are a little worried for you.

Like? But was it the episode? Was it Josh Brolin that hosted where it was just.

Yes, he was really into me, He's so sweet.

That was the Josh Brolin episode.

Entara Palin just came on Update and she was a really good sport and she was like, okay, sure, I'll just dance next to you. And I remember thinking a wonder if her team has really told her what this is.

But that's okay, we're gonna do it.

We're gonna and I think my pregnancy helped, Like it was like how do you how can you say no to the lady? And it was so it was thrilling at the moment, it was really fun. It was really fun. And then I gave birth, like, uh, let's see maybe like four or five days later.

Yes, I remember Update. He was like, yeah, he's not here because she's having a baby. And that was the first John Ham episode. Yes, circle right the show.

And him was the host.

I mean the millions. Craziest thing about that episode, which was the Josh Brolin one, was that the musical guest was Adele fully Adele like pre like pre like Adele.

Oh like chasing Pavements, Chasing Pavements.

Yes, And then I remember she won Best New Artists a couple of months later, and I was like, well, yeah, probably because everyone in the world was watching that episode and they were like, who the hell is she? She's incredible, right, that was a night of culture, and you were at that show. I was. I went to all of them.

I sometimes feel like I have more gay women that I get that feedback from, which I appreciate but not But but that's nice you to say gay.

Men the men, I think.

Just I don't know that the men respond to this thing where like you are just being like your your full powerful self on TV and that is something that like we kind of have to like go about sideways and media sometimes and you will eat our own sometimes and so like it's I feel like you do figure very very largely in that in that sense.

Wow, that means a lot. That's a high compliment.

I mean, I feel like for me, the biggest thing that culturally that I get a lot of feedback from from, especially from gay men, is mean.

Girls like that.

That feels like, especially for the millennials, felt like their version of how to interact with me more I think than USNL and Parks.

I don't know, but I was I was gonna bring I was gonna bring up Strawns and fair Child.

You're right, there are. There are certain press interviews that you guys did for that that I watched a million that was really fun.

Those were like when movies, like when there were it.

Was just like many money, money, money movie, these movies. And here's a fun story about that.

Will and Arnett and I played brother and sister, but we were actually married in my life and we they tested that movie, and the testing they were like, we hate Strawans and fair Child.

What do you mean the villain? Right?

And I remember that the info coming back like a lot of people don't really like the and we were like, well.

We're the villains, you know.

But but to the director's credit, they I think they kept a lot of it in. But that was really but yeah, we did tons of photo shoots and that.

Was really big. The extra.

Yeah, at that point we had already been like used to it.

Will feral big comedy movie.

Yeah, and John Heater obviously huge, like big moment for him. But I was just so tickled as like a comedy person watching us now every week as someone who was like scrolling like the writing credits for The Simpsons, like we were like those kids. Like it was just thrilling to see you and Will in a film like that, and I will always always remember just you as Marilyn and him is.

Also also first of all, I was walking in today, I was like, who am I dressed like? And I was like, I'm dressed like Will in light of the Roxbury I have, like.

I have, yes, I'm paying amas. Funny story about that movie. We had to learn how to ice skate, and I knew enough to note, I'm not gonna be doing a ton of ice skating this movie. You know, they had incredible body doubles and face switcheroo technology, and they had really good ice skaters having to do that.

And I knew.

I was like, I think, if I could just fake it in the waist up, I'll be fine.

It was just like the fact that it was so.

But they had an incredible professional like ex Olympian ice dancer coach, performer coaching me.

Again.

It was a time when movies were like you're gonna have to We're gonna I was on SNL and so on the weekends and in the mornings I would have to go to Chelsea Piers and ice skate, and I remember she was this, really, I'm sorry, I forget her name. If you're listening, you were awesome. But I would do that thing that I learned early when I wanted someone to not do something, where I would just she would sit, we'd have our.

Coffee in the morning. I knew we only in an hour.

The clock would be behind her and I'd be like, wait, what's going on with you? And she'd go, well, we have to get out on the ice, and I go, I know, I know, I know we have to.

We have to. I'd be like, but how is your daughter.

I would try to get her to talk, and the clock.

Would just kick away.

And because it was so hard to learn, bone shows, bone tired, and also I knew it.

I knew I didn't have to know that exactly. You're like, they're gonna it's gonna be this, it's gonna be way to stop. We're gonna be on wires.

I'm never going to get it.

And at one point she said to me, you know, if at any point something's hurting, make sure you tell me to We were like proud, well, I was like, I will, like, I'm.

Not an athlete, Like I'm not going to play through the bay. I Am not trying to get a mental here, so I can kind of ice caape it.

Not that well, did you do sports in high school?

I was, I was like, did a bunch of sports moderately? Well, uh huh, like good trash talker, like out on the field, played softball, played soccer like a little.

Basketball, like just kind of was like like the mouth.

But energy is something that I would I would ascribe to you, thank you.

I was really good at keeping the team up and really good at like knowing where the play is, like a lot of like plays at second you know, like that, but not didn't really have the skill small, didn't really have an arm softball. Yes, And it's amazing that I'm not gay, because every picture of.

Me during that time looks kind of gay.

Cutest like baby, but we all did back then.

We all did in many ways, but like not a jock, yeah right, and then she was a cheerleader sometimes too, just kind of a floater to use a.

Me and girl's term.

No, that's great because I feel like there's something about young people now where they are struggling with finding people just socializing in general.

It's a thing.

It's like what you want to tell them is like, oh, is it like an osteoporosis thing, Like it's like a calcium thing, Like you have to start early and like get the whole sportsman thing going.

I think to be in to learn how to collaborate in any way. I think it's important to be not to do sports, but to be involved in activities like that. I just think, I don't know.

It was a different time where you could be okay at softball and play in your local softball league for a long time. But now you have to be like on a traveling team and it's very intense, and parents are involved. Parents have ruined a lot of things. Like when parents show up, they kind of ruin things. And my generation, my parents, no one went to anyone's occasionally went to a game, but there were no adults taking

Right.

I imagine you have not been domb parent in that context with your kids.

I feel like I'm trying not to be.

I feel like you're showing up to the things that in a way that is like kind of all right.

It's some people it's their identity, right, Like they're living through their kids, I guess, but which I.

Mean, you have to be supportive of old. Are your kids now they're fourteen and sixteen? Okay those are Yeah? You got teen boys? Yeah?

I love teens.

You've break in thousand and half.

I love teens. I'm here to say it.

Grow. Don't tell me that I'm gross. I know what they do. I love teens. I'm here to say the teen years have my favorite years. Why is it because they're kind of like riding hard for you right now? They're just like interesting people.

Yeah, and also their friends are kind of interesting, and you're like, this is like the black Diamond of parenting. This is where it's coming in and you're having big conversations, they're making choices, You're trying to keep them safe. It's people like focus on the little the young ens, like the baby stuff and the young'ins. But I don't know, there's something I think I'm good with teens.

Yeah, there's there's it's black diamond. It's moguls, Mogus, mogus moguls got it either either right on top or right around.

Is this tied too?

Because I've always thought of you as this aspirational TikTok person, because I'm like, well, I need to get on TikTok because I feel like there are people out there like Amy Pole who are like, it's cool, I like it.

But I feel like you were on TikTok almost first when you were lip syncing, and then you came in, you dominated, and then you.

Like left, Like you know what that wasn't TikTok that we're so ahead of the curve was Instagram. Instagram.

We had so many viral things pre TikTok, things that would have taken off on TikTok. Now, I know that's this sounds so cloying and obnoxious, but it's true. Like Matt and I would like start like song like, oh.

Yeah we tunes.

Yeah, we would start our pay talk songs, bear people, if you know what we're talking about. You know Four Nights in Orlando, which horror story every second was almost fifteen second song in Orlando. We would go we would be on about a metric ton of edibles and we shoot.

Like horror anthologies. Add Disney World. Oh my god, it's out there. It is out there. If you go deep in the instagrams, they are there. But what was the horror anthology called four Nights in Orlando? And then it was like it was like four Nights in Orlando Hotel, four Nights in Orlando, Gay Ghost, four Nights in Orlando? Which war? Which one was our best? Where was our best? We always say that was the most satisfying one when you watched it altogether. And also you could see so

That's our lovely social team. I feel like we could put it back on TikTok, but there would just be that twenty fourteen Patina on it, where you'd be like, ew, I don't want to watch anything from that time.

I feel like more and more, I mean, even starting this podcast is a good example of that. I'm getting a little less worried about whether or not my timing is right.

It's okay, yeah, yeah, I know. You can't worry about it.

I feel like, if you want to do it, I feel like you can do whatever you want if you want it.

If you don't want to do it, certainly don't. Right, you do whatever you want anytime.

You's fun.

Yeah, it should only be fun.

It is fun. And there was a time when I was even doing like the challenges. Yeah, like I just looked through it and it was it's just like me. One time I did a totally earnest TikTok to Taylor Swift song Harris. It was earnest, it was it was so it was because I cringe mountain. Have you heard about this? It's so major. Once you climb cringe mountain, then you get to the other side of.

Oh yeah, I mean that's where the power lies is post cringe. I mean you learn that with comedy a lot. You know, you have to just you can't be embarrassed.

Like do you have the moment in your career that you're like this, I climb cringe mountain at this.

Soint Oh yeah, A cringe mountain is far behind me.

Yeah.

I don't worry.

About that at all, because basically, you survive a ton of embarrassments like death by a thousand cuts.

You just realize I'm okay, it's okay.

And then you realize that, like, actually, the the longer in your career, you should be taking more risks and trying new things, and you should be like a little nervous and a little excited. Yeah, And the minute you are afraid about being cool, you're screwed.

It's true, and it stops you doing things.

It does, and and everyone is so obsessed with themselves. I would so much rather somebody be a little tender rony and make a cringey mistake than the opposite. When people are really cool, I'm like, oh honey, Like when they're trying to be very well, I get so I get some stress for that.

It's not easy.

It's not easy out there, right. But it's the same way with like hostedt SNL. Like a host that will come in and will be like kind of open face sandwich and be like I'm nervous or whatever, like I'm gonna try and they give your sketch there all and you're like, I love you forever, yes.

But when someone's trying to be cool, you're like, hmmm, I can think of the people and.

The coolness, you know, it's so it's a protective shell, so you kind of feel for them.

We've all been there, but it is it's so fleet, like what is what is cool?

Right? Is it actually never was?

I mean, you guys do kind of define it in the You guys, you do kind of define it. And why I'm going to say this, the reason why you define it is because your list is about not being cool, right, but it is the coolest list in the world.

It takes the piss out of the list in the.

First yes, and it reminds you that like we're all like, we're all like, I'm um, we're dumb.

Do you want to know what it was I think for me in high school? I don't know about you. Did you guys have friends that made fun of you constantly in high school? Like I allowed myself to be the butt of the joke a lot. They they made fun of me for the way I held it flour They made fun of me for the way I wore a hat. They made fun of me because I couldn't see colors, Like I was constantly getting ribbed on by

Matte, you need people to ribu.

Well.

I think it's a very East Coast thing too.

I would agree it's.

A very East Coast thing. Like the more I like you, the more I'll tease you. Yeah, it's like it is like a safety thing. I mean with within reason, like you don't want to be bullied, No, don't hurt my feeling.

Manners are for people we don't know.

Okay, yes, you know what. That was actually an unspoken thing, especially with my my first ever like ensemble I ever felt like I was a part of. Was my like friend group in high school. Yeah, and our thing was we always took the grip the ship out of here. Yeah.

There's there's nothing more satisfying than when you can tease someone with love, yeah, and they tease you back, and you're like, oh, we're saying like we're this is intimacy.

Is that how you and your friends are?

Yeah? That was Boston all the way.

Yeah yeah, yeah yeah and then through SNL as well.

Yes, like hard like because when you tease someone the right way, it also means that you see them. Yeah, you feel seen right, Like the most delightful thing when someone can like you know, you know, you're like talking about someone You're like, I'm so tired and someone's.

Like you are.

We couldn't tell, you know, like you're like, like you just feel so like delighted.

You know, I'm tired of the time. But are you downloading this into the into the boys at all?

I'm trying to, like, I think I'm trying to just kind of but you know, here's the thing about teens.

They won't be to no downloading, nooad. You go from producer to consultant. Ah.

And that is not my line. That is someone else's line. Someone else said that. But you go from handling your kid's life over like and scheduling their play dates and getting their stuff and getting like and making their lunch all the stuff. It's like you're in charge to being like I know you didn't ask me, but what I would do is you have to just stand back.

You can't.

You almost can't tell them anything.

Just think about it.

When your parents would say something at that age, it would just be like shot up. So you you you do the I don't know. There's a really good technique. I'm super into it. It works for people too, but where you just repeat back to them what they said to you. So I hate my teacher. You hate your teacher, Yeah, because she doesn't listen to us, and she's always like giving us assignments we don't like.

She's always giving you assignments you don't like. Yeah, you just don't say and it kind of keeps pulling the thread the.

Thread, and they talk to you and they're not looking for you to fix it, and certainly not to give advice. No barf, like you know what you should do or you know, teachers are really like you know, they're working really hard these days or whatever.

They just want to say it to you.

Even adults don't want to be told. You agree. I I did it for a year.

I was trying a thing where I would only give advice to people that asked for it.

And you know what's funny, I'm asking for it and I still have friends. There are certain friends and I feel like it's conversations I have to have where it's like I haven't realized it will be really easy to change dynamic in our friendship if I just tell them I don't need advice. I think. I think I have a therapist for that. Like I don't need prescription, you know what I mean. It's like when people give me prescription,

Finally it's Brene Brown walk alongside m not like not like face the person and say this should do. It's like they just want to be told that meme of hey, I'm not reading all that, I'm so happy for you or I'm sorry that happened. Yeah, like they just want to be told great or I'm so sorry.

And the other side of that is I'm really egotistical about my advice.

I think I have great advice.

So I not only don't want advice that I don't ask for, but I like to offer advice that nobody asked for. And then I get a little butt hurt when they don't take it. I write, I'm like, you didn't take my advice, Like that's solid gold advice. And then my therapist was like, why are you giving advice to people that don't ask for it. That's precious advice that you can't.

Just give out willing nilling, Like be respectful of your own advice.

Yeah, and value it.

You can value it. And you can even say like are you open to advice? And if they say yes, you go. You know, if I give it, do you think you'll this advice means something to me? When it's something, it's like a lot.

Can we can we ask you for like, do you have any any advice for us?

God, there's such a little advice for you. No, don't come on, okay, in what in what area? Can you ask something specifically about?

Or just like I want like all of these things at SNL that I feel like I are not compatible in terms of like lifestyle things of like dating and like having a dog and like all of these things.

Yes, advices. The advice is it's just just waited out until until you finish one thing.

Also, you're so ahead of the game by realizing it's something that you want. Oh, Like, I think just even knowing what you want, you're ahead of the game. Life is an arrow pointing you to what you want. So like by not getting you're like, oh, I'm really missing that I want that.

That's interesting.

That's Oh, thank you SNL for pointing the arrow to what I want. And I think my advice would be try to imagine that it's not binary.

It's not like either have it or you don't. You can't have it there you can't.

Like the can'ts, the cants and shouldn't and maybe not isn't Like there's like there's a lot of space in between, Yes, that not being a place where you could have it and a place where you could have it.

I'm receiving that. Thank you. Mine's really specific. I need like a moving company. Oh, I have a great one, and I need like some people to cook I lost some stuff up very good.

So my advice there would be, don't lift a finger.

You have you have right, we have a you have a not you're doing well. You have enough money, you know, thank God, very lucky. Take your privilege and.

Get through my bank account before we started. She knows all my financial stuff we made.

Get somebody to pack everything up for you.

But do one pass and go through and grab anything, a document, anything that you would.

Sob over if if it was lost.

Yeah, I mean.

Sob not like I love this chair, I love this bab whatever, Like, go through and go if this got thrown in the ocean by accident, would it ruin my life?

Right? Get those things out everything else, let them pack it for you. Wow. You know what's crazy is I'm realizing that stuff is less and less and less. Stuff means less time, even like sentimental things, which I felt like, oh, shouldn't they mean more to me? Over time? I think as I get older, I realized just things are things. It's it's it's bizarre. Like we were doing playing this game at Coachella the night before the festival. We were doing like the newly wed game with each other, and

There's a thing called Swedish death cleaning. I produced a show about it, which is all about the Swedish death clean.

The gentle art of Swedish death cleaning, which is Swedes believe one of the things that you can do for your family is you can clear out your stuff before you die. Like you know, they want less stuff, right, and why not give your stuff away while you're still vital and alive and tell people why it means something to you so they can get to know you, because what happens in the States is people die, they leave

Doing that along the way. Yeah, maybe he is your brother still there. Yeah, he lives in Sweden. Oh so cool.

There was there was a sparkless thing where he was just playing basketball and I was like, that seems like a cool dude.

Yeah, my brother is the coolest. He's a really funny writer and performer. And he moved to Sweden. He met a woman who lived in Sweden.

They got married at a kid and now he's been there, god must be almost twenty years. He's like a full expat.

He lives outside of Stockholm and like speak Swedish.

No, it's so cool.

I'm really trying to find a husband with another passport. Oh yeah, like I do think it's time. It's time, like and weirdly enough, like this is a pattern. I've been going out with a lot of guys that like, weirdly are also from another country and are sober. Ooh, I like that for you. But it's really good, isn't it. I don't even not even trying to date like sober guys, and I'm not trying to date guys with like like

So great, right, but be careful with that London weather. That's all I gotta say. That London weather is like Sweden.

It is dark. It is a dark, cold country. To just be aware.

I do well with overcast, you know what I mean, Like it's I don't really You're right, I'm definitely a sunboy, but like I've had enough of it. It's like I go up on Long Island and I'm like a child of the of the beach in the sun, and so now I'm kind of like maybe I've had enough, like for my life. I love a UK guy for you, I think so with a scarf and everything. I don't

You know the guy that did all the movie like a Richard Curtis.

Jude like from the cold we met at the Oscars. We did meet with your your Curtis at the os just.

A gentleman like shaking off the snow off overcoat.

Yes, oh that's good. Okay. Now I'm like upset that it's going to be springing somewhere because my favorite time to date is the fall in the winter because it's a cuffing season, because it's yes, but like I never cuff. My thing is like I just like to be dressed up for a date. And also maybe it's just of what your body is doing. This is the dysmorphic part.

What what I project upon you that I want for you is a gentleman who's maybe a little sober or whatever, just like not he's just like he's he's not the main character. Okay, he's the one that's like just like look at him, go.

I do think I do.

Do you subscribe to a flower gardener sort of duality and relationships.

Like one person is the flower they need to be watered and gardened, and one person is a gardener and they kind of that's what they do. It can't be as simple as that, but that is a it is a dichotomy thing that people sometimes think about.

I think that's interesting because I would say, for you, you're extroverted person, right, probably secretly more introverted than we think you're, Yeah, but an extroverted person who I think it would be nice for you to have like a British Jude law looking gentleman who has the taxi waiting while you work the room.

As the taxi. Yeah, taxi waiting, And I love someone that wants to leave. He's like ready to go love, Yeah, Like I'm ready to go, ready to go love that rocks.

Yes, there's actually nothing less sexy than someone who doesn't know when to leave a party. It's a problem when someone can't leave a party because they're just.

Kind of waiting.

I've gotten for this thing that's that hasn't happened yet to happen.

Yeah, absolutely, not absolutely, and it won't happen. It won't happen. And also I'm the part like, yeah, hello, like what are you waiting for the part of the party. We have to ask the question. So this is the question that we ask all of our guests. This is what was the culture that made you say culture was for you?

Okay, well, you know you were my favorite podcasts. So I've thought about this a lot.

As why I love this part.

I love this podcast, and I thought about it a lot, and you know, I didn't want to overthink it. But I have to say, for me, growing up, there was a woman who I just related to you. She she just felt very strong. She had a really specific POV. She kind of asked her what she wanted. She always had good jokes, and that woman was miss Picky.

You know that she might be coming on less culture, she might be against we are obsessed She's one of the top icons.

She at a time when women were told to be you know, seen and not heard. She took up space. She was very body positive. She was, yes, at times a little violent.

We would we'd.

Maybe correct that now there was some there was.

It was almost always in self defense.

I completely agree. She often saved the day, save the day. She said what she wanted. She was like one big intrusive thought. And if you suffered from those like I did as a kid, you were like, I can't believe she said that out loud. She was always funny. She had really a good joke. Kermie loved her.

She was the only person in him up at Christmas Carol who stood up to Scrooge.

What whenever she goes.

Martial arts culture, respectful of Eastern culture.

Okay, if you say so, I don't know, Okay.

I'm you can enjoy. Miss Piggy's her highest respectful she was.

She was such a funny character, larious, I mean funny, funny, funny, funny.

Outsized diva who demanded that she get her shine. And what was always great was the budget they would blow out for her sets and everything, and how disastrously it would go wrong. But yeah, it's still she still came out on top. Yeah, they never she was allowed to, like, I guess, like keep failing. She was a woman in Hollywood. They let keep flopping.

Look, it was the seventies, right, It wasn't perfect.

So at times Miss Piggy like almost felt like, oh, she's a cautionary tale of someone who's too But the audience did not feel that from her. The Muppet Show when it would come on and the dude get things started and the song would start. As a kid, I was like, this is Hollywood everything. This felt like this was you know, I didn't know anyone that was an

And it was get ready for the show.

It's like very ESNLNL SNL. It was my presinal because my generation of s and all the people like I was like ten when Eddie Murphy joined SNL and I was like fourteen when it was like Dana Carvey and Jan Hooks and Phil Hartmon.

So that was but the Muppet Show was the first feeling.

Of there's a show about to be put on. And Miss Piggy was the star of the Muppet Show.

Yes she was. She was the star. She was the she. She told everyone what to do, and Kermie couldn't resist.

I mean he was a little shy, and you know, she kind have probably spoke for him in a way that I think he liked.

Well, yeah, thank you for putting some shine on Kermit too, because Kermie, I think, was also just as valuable of a male a masculinity comp yes that as Miss Piggy was a femininity sort of example.

Yeah, they flipped.

He was kind of a soft boy also, though during that time we also had people like Alan Alda and mash Right.

He was like so nice even though he was so we had some sweetie pies.

Yes, it wasn't as masculine all the time as people think, like the seventies. There was some like groovy like you know dads or even like Michael Landon who was like tough but like loved his daughter and was kind of sweet. But Kermie, Hermit was very in touch with his feminine side.

Yes, it sounds like you have feelings for Kermie. You know why I love Kermit.

Kermit was a peacemaker, yeah, Kermit was a peacemaker, and as I get older, I'm drawn to people men, especially who are looking for peace.

Oh yeah, all I want to do is feel calm.

Me too, I want to feel calm. I want to feel safe, and I don't conflict used to be the way I'm an enneagram eight.

Do you care about your anim that's right?

Your seven? That makes sense? What are you in? Yeah? So hard.

No one understands you. You're very it's very hard to know. Fours are like they're like special romantic. Yeah, fours are dream.

Maker like that makes artists remind me eight challenger.

Yeah, so I used to think conflict was how I and it was often how I got intimate with people, Like yeah, and now I want more peace, I see.

And sevens are so.

Much fun, you know, if we exhaust ourselves. Yeah, sevens are require a lot, but they're so fun. Yeah, I mean, I like, it's so funny because I and then I looked at the results and it was like, whoa, I didn't stand a chance. I was such a s like it was it was I was thinking like, oh, I don't know, these hits aren't going to all go together. It was like you're a seven down the house down, yes,

And also you're just gonna be kind of like, what's the next thing, Like you're definitely for the adventure.

I'm more along consumer. So you used to say that about me all the time, beautiful excited, Yeah, and sometimes that can get me into Yeah, I have a lot of sevens in my life. I love them. For those that you don't care about enneagrams, whatever, But they're enthusiasts. They're enthusiasts. Yes, they love things and.

They love having fun. But a seven is always like you're like, let's go do this thing, and they're like is it.

Going to be fun? And you're like, I mean, I guess I fun. Hmmm.

Fun is important. Newness is important.

It's interesting to be the kind of person that's like seeks excitement and seeks like to consume things and have experiences. But then also have like an anxiety creep up because it's like that's when you get you get, you get in your head with a lot of like judgment, judgment, judgment.

Wanted because of same I always thought like that my thing was to challenge and buck the system and kind of like push and push. And now I'm really I really feel lucky that I'm surrounded by a lot of people who are not that way, who are like more peaceful and peacemakers.

And kind of like a little bit like it could be this, It could be that.

Like for the longest time, being definitive and like certain and decisive, yeah, was like safety And now I'm like luckily a little bit more like I don't know, yeah, you.

Know, I think it's interesting because one of your like I would say defining comedic and like public traits is your energy. Yeah, you know what I mean. Like, so I would imagine I identify with this that sometimes when people like interact with you, they feel like they also need to bring a lot of energy. And then there you are meeting that and all of a sudden, you exhausted girl, and like you're like, wait, hold on, yeah, where was I in that? Oh? I was definitely talking. Yeah,

Yeah, you know, we were like it was a different time where there was less women. You had to kind of you know, for those that are not watching them, I'm saying, but you bring up something that's so true, which is I feel like and getting back to like your fifties and on. But I'm all about practicing my backhand. That's my new phrase, which is my forehand has served me so well. It is I've made a lot of shots. I feel really confident. It's I'm very very grateful for

And yeah, it's thinking about how you communicate textually, yes, rather than literally, you're super textually where you're just like, I'm going to communicate what I think by saying it and write something like this where it's like.

Well, this is a very fore answer you're giving right now, because.

No, because you're right, you're saying like you're coming from a feeling place and I'm coming from an action place.

Yeah. Yeah, and that's a challenger thing. Yeah.

So the four is like, how can I express my feelings or have these feelings differently?

And it's like, what can I do differently?

Yea?

And our work is to like, and I'm so sorry if this is boring for anybody, our work is to feel more.

Your work is to do.

More, less feelings, more doing, And mine is more more feelings.

Less doing. Is Piggy and as miss Piggy and a, I.

Think she is definitely an eight. Miss Piggy is kind of an island. She is definitely an enny agreement. That would be fun to do that with all the money, I think. So I think Kermit's a nine. He's a piece maker.

Yeah, he has to be the hold the center of that place. Yeah, he's like, hey, guys, wait, maybe Kermit's my man and I need to piggy up what she gets here. I'm gonna be like, listen, although I think they broke up, didn't they break up to finish?

Remember the ABC show they introduced that new pig girl. Do you remember that, there's that new pig woman. And she was swooping in and trying to trying, trying to pick up Kermit, and the Internet lost their mind. They were like, get the fuck away from him. She needs to get the futod a chance against me.

I gotta watch this.

I did not I did not know that.

And do you also remember how public television is so great?

Sesame Street? Do you remember when Sesame Street? When I was growing up, there was a character called Snuffle.

Up Against Yes, okay, yeah, what then they took Snuffle up Against away because it was frustrating kids.

Yeah, because why why couldn't they see him? And I was like, wait, but who said this?

They say someone said that they took him away because some kids, especially in the eighties when child abduction was a thing, they were like parents would like it was that like they wouldn't believe what kids were saying.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah show yeah. A kid didn't feel believed, right, And it was at a time when you needed to trust what children were saying, Like I saw a strange man at the side of our street. You know, there's there's like a lot of implications when it comes to like PBS and children's programming. Did you ever get to go down there to Sesame Street? And I got to do something with Elmo, which is really cool. What did you guys do together? We did like a word of the Day or something.

Yeah, And then you know, and when I like and I loved growing up, I loved an Oscar the Grouch alarm clock.

I like he's a great restarch.

Larry David owes a lot to Oscar. Yes, yes, the alarm clock used to start.

With it's gonna be a lousy day, wake up, It's gonna and it was such a gen x alarm clock. But you could never do that now. But yeah, I love him, that whole Jim Henson world.

I have to say it has permeated most of my life because you know, also was in the beginning of us now.

But just like those muppets and puppets are everywhere in my psyche.

Yeah.

Absolutely, we got to send up prayers up. What the heck that was? Oh my god, that was Piggy Squeeze come here.

Yeah, that's that is stressful though, because have you ever been with someone who's working a puppet?

No, this is so we heard that. Like it's basically what it is is it's like they can go for like twenty five thirty minutes at a time and then they need to short break.

It's stressful. Yeah, I mean, God bless everyone who works puppets. It's amazing, but it's it's intense. Right where do you look, right, I guess you look at the puppet.

I'm going to have no problem looking right in miss Piggy's eyes. I'm telling you, I'm committing so hard.

I know I might cry though, because I feel the same sort of cosmic connection to her that that you're talking about, which is that I'm like, she she was my first glimpse into old Hollywood, unto like, and she's like modeled after those actresses, and.

She's modeled for like Peggy Lee, right, yes, yeah, and she was also kind of like in drag a little bit like a real vibe of like costumes and and you always were going into her world and it was like satin and she was very like she was very feminine, but.

The show girl. She was a show She was the last show girl with Pamela Anderson. I just think she's beautiful. Yeah, And pigs have newly been become my favorite animal. Oh really, And a lot of culture's pigs are really really revered. Yeah, so smart? Are they one of the smart ones? Yes? Smart days smart. So I'm like, now I'm liking this new kick where I'm finding out about how deep the intelligence of certain animals goes. Like I went on elephants the other day, and now I'll never be the same.

They also decorate in this beautiful aesthetic that does feel like how do I put this?

Like no one will ever live there? No, no, no, no, like the tiling that they put it, like I watched there. Like when someone is just like, yeah, so we ripped out the floors, I'm like, what are you talking about? Like in all respect, but I'm like I could never be like I want to rip out these floors. I want to re upholster now. I don't know what that word means. It's hard. And also there is something about I love interior design. I love it.

It's kind of like a I want to say, a hobby.

But I love working with people and making spaces and looking at making it. I love it.

Yes, And I love looking at like magazines and looking stuff online and I find just like what people think is comfortable. Yeah, I is so subjective. It's just and for me the I must rest, my eye must rest.

Got it.

So there's like there was like an organizing show where it was like what kind of organizer are you?

Are you? So let me ask you this.

Okay, there's four different ways, and I'm gonna butcher this.

But do you like a room where there's an open shelf and like, you know, your plates and cups and everything, you can see them floating? Okay, okay, this one where you're like floating shelf and cups and organized, well, but visit one where they're behind a cabinet, organized behind a cabinet.

Those are two options.

And then also do you like to have let's say you're putting away your important piece of paper. Do you want to have it in a drawer where you throw it in in a drawer and it's worth all the important papers and you'll organize it later, or do you want to have a place that it lives every.

Time that I see. I mean, here's my thing. I don't like looking at cupboards. I don't like looking at cupboards and shelves. I think I'm s o l Some people like to see their stuff and some people like to not see this. I think it could be interesting to see myself.

I am going to be that not see your stuff school, because if one thing is off on the floating shelf and it's out on display, it's gonna bug the ship out of me. I'm never gonna feel I'm gonna have that itch in my brain the entire time I'm looking at it.

Yes, and what about countertops tables?

Do they need to be clear? Pretty much? Have to be clear?

Yeah?

Yeah, a strong aesthetic. I mean he I keep telling him that he should get a d over to his place because it's so cute and cooling, bowing of like housewares. Yeah, what about you? What are you doing? It? Would love to do that? What come on?

Everybody's well, you know what, I'm going to take my own advice.

It's never too late, it's never to wait to do what? But what would just have a house? Okay? Wait, your conversation with Tina about this? Don't you think? Open eyeglasses?

I've been trying to get Tina to make money off of eyeglasses for her entire life, but beside, she doesn't want to do I understand, I respect it. She only do what you want to do, but you could do it too, bowing.

I don't know.

I'm of the same mind as Tina. I'm like, what you get in her head because she said it. No, I just I've always thought the same thing, like, there's no practical reason for me to for me to do that.

You know, I'm gonna sell whatever. Whatever, Yeah, sweat face, I put my name on plastic water bottles. Whatever.

No, yeah, only if you only if you'd be into the design and into the aesthetic of it. But something aesthetic would be interesting and fun.

To work on. Perhaps perhaps watch the space. I can see it for you. I think you're a huge brand.

I completely agree, you know what I'm saying.

Yes, y'all, I completely agree.

But at least get a d in in that house and get them to walk around and your bowl of limes, show them your bowl of.

Wait, who love lines? I love limes? I actually do. But but but she said I love limes. And then afterwards she was like, I don't know why I said that. She revealed later she doesn't know she does. She was like a joke. Wait, now I'm actually thinking because they say, like, just think of some images that you like and like things that you want to see around your house. I actually would love limes.

I like limes are so good. Or how about this a bowl of art chokes. If you put artichokes in a bowl, you're a billion Really, yes, I guess that is what that means. If you put three artichokes in a silver bowl, you're You're done.

I've always wanted to have bananas on the table. Of course, you can do nothing. Stop. You can do that, you can do that, you can't do that. I don't think I don't think you understand what my has been like. It's only now that I'm.

Like, very seven. Okay, we write we need to root.

It down seven. My life has been so seven. It's been so like LA in New York, La, New York. Where can I go next? Coach again this weekend?

Leaving out of a suitcase?

Yeah, very that And I can't. I can't, I can't, I can't. The seven has to the seven has to go to a nine peacemaker. Your space has to be your space is important? Yeah? It is? Is it is it? It is? What is your most interior designy motif? Yeah? I love well, I love right now. My house is a California ranch.

So I do like that kind of a tiny bit of Quaker Quaker's a tiny bit of Quaker craft. Like I like a wood like I like a wood bench with like a patterned cushion. I like like a nice patterned rug with like a black sofa. I like a warm tone chairs at mad warm tone table with like an amber light fixture. I like, I like a bit more masculine, so naturally, and it's very masculine.

I literally what I said to the guy who's doing my apartment, and I was like, I wanted to be like masculine but light, you know what I mean.

Masculine can sometimes be like too much like steel, not that you know the.

Word, I said Redford, ooh, like it's kind of just like it's giving, like like not denim, but like like like yeah, warm masculine like wood, but with like little light blue denimy touches like because they say look in your closet, and that's like a hint as to what you might want to, like, yeah, look like.

And I'm leaning lately less mid century and more like a little bit like worn and waspy y. I'm trying to do more antique and flea pieces than new pieces.

But your masculine is callback Alan Alda. My masculine is Alan seventies sweet loves his wife. Because mid century is kind of done. Don't feel like everyone was doing mid century.

Sure, once I Dwell came out like and everything was very like weird table and like, yeah, everything got a little too mid century and it's very la total well.

The first time in the first apartment I ever got, I walked into West Elm and the first thing I said was does it look like I don't belong here? Because I thought like it was for fancy people. And they said, no, what are you talking about? We'll help you. And so, because I'm colorblind and have no taste, I was like, I guess I like this. And I just pointed to a display and they were like, you like just this? And I was like, yeah, I think I like this for my living ground. They're like, you don't

I was telling an old story about yourself. I think you do have a sense of stuff.

I'm color blind. I know a lot of men are. A lot of men are like, that's that's.

Sorry, what do you mean that doesn't I was gonna say that doesn't. I don't think that correlates to taste or style.

I have that very malleable in my settings, Like like I live I'm subletting something in New York right now, and the guy has like a crazy pink gallery wall with all sorts of different coloral pictures on it, and I've just been like, yeah, I live here and I like it, and I have no.

Idea whether or not I do orgy. That's a sub lit reality. I'm I'm the one that's asking him, like what are the spaces? Yeah, you like, where do you feel comfortable? And I'm literally like, you should think of your favorite restaurant at Disney World. I love being everywhere. I love being in a sushi place, I love being in Mexican spy.

Yeah, but do you like like I like things to feel nice? Yes, I love texture.

So I have these two chairs in my living room that are upholstered with them like that.

Really fuzzy, like yes, the fuzzy stuff. Fuzzy stuff, he said, that. And why I like is when I walk by them, I like always.

You set them, but they are clean. Oh but you know that's okay.

This is You're not going to be worried about cleaning.

I'm covered in buffalo sauce most of the time. I didn't tell you that I eat it. On the thing we ran through my financials, I forgot about like ninety eight percent of it is buffalo sauce. I have so much buffalo sauce all my shit.

You know you should do just do one room. Just do one room, Like what would be your version of the nice of a nice?

Yeah, yeah, that's great, just one room. See what I love is like also like I love when I go to someone's house, like in the suburbs, and the living room is like the beach and the bathroom is the ocean, and that's just what it is. It's like almost every suburban house is like my bathroom is the bottom of the sea, you know, and that sea show.

Well, I always say people's houses. People either want to tell you where they've been or where.

They are oh one or the other. They never tell you where they're going so exactly, so it's like where have I been?

I like have African masks, and I have you know, sorries, and I have like all this stuff that I've collected.

We are in Denver, baby, and you're gonna know it. You're gonna know that we are in Colorado, like it's one or the other. Well, I think Matt has a lot to work with in terms of where he's been and where he agreed. One thing I don't want to do. A lot of gay guys like in their first apartments, they have a big gay picture, like of someone's tricep or like someone laying on the beach. It's just like this part of someone's I think I can. I can forego big gay picture and never sleep on a plant

I think it's she This is a really interesting experiment about how we see ourselves in how do we want people.

To see us?

Yes, yes, But I think it's also a statement on depth. You are getting depth because this side of your face is not it isn't focused, and then this side isn't.

Yeah, my right eye is in focus. But you know, don't you deserve to be in focus? I think I do you don't you? Absolutely?

It doesn't one deserve to be in focused.

I'm bringing my foe energy into this. I'm like being academic about.

A lot of Yeah.

And also you're it's an incredible picture.

It is such a good picture. Thank you, And it's a great picture of you two. But I mean I would try to get in focus.

You had said maybe AI can get you in focus, and you were saying, I don't know if I want that.

Because I don't want to necessarily support AI, right right, But then I got this, It's like you have to just we have to just kind of like succumb our, hands out. It's too late. This is all AI, everything, AI, everything is. I've been AI for nine years. This is going to be HI human. We are about to go into I don't think so human intelligence part of the podcast. So this is I don't think funny. This is in fact, our sixty second second where we sort of tear up culture.

And this is what this is all the premble I think you're gonna do. So that that was just the preamble. This is Matt Rogers. I don't think so, honey, his time starts now.

I don't think so, honey. Trampolines, you don't need it. Like, honestly, your kids don't need to be up that high. What I would say is get like I don't know, like get like a room, like a matted room, you know what I mean. Like if you have a trampoline, you can afford a trampoline, you probably have like a playroom or a designated area where the kids go pat it like a cell. Have the kids toss themselves all around the room. That is better than trampolines. And also, let

The teens are all about the slang has been video games with Jen Alfan gen Z like side Quest and NPCs. It's like this is permeating the culture with them in a way that I'm I'm like y'all, but we we all should develop a video game vocabulary on the basics.

And I agree with you about trampoline.

Yeah, none of my childhood memories include jumping on them. None of my good childhood memories, you know what I mean. I'm the broken bones. I know where you're going to end up. The pit, the pits and.

The wait time is long? Is that part of the show A long times? There's a bed shortage. Oh, it's a it's a messive god, it's a mess. It's stressful, but it's real time, no scoring, grounded and acting.

I couldn't believe it this morning, like when Patrick was like, yeah, my mom said, it's insane. What you watch happens to the human body on motorcycles. And then he was like end trampolines and I was like, don't even don't even keep going.

I can't if you're gonna on kids, right, if you're gonna ride a motorcycle. And this sounds a little insensitive, at least go on the donor list, Well, yeah, at least make they so I'm of course, of course, come on, cut me open, get the cut me open and take this stuff.

Some of this stuff is good in here. Yeah, some of this stuff still good. These Oh honey, someone should I was noticing them. Are are we giving gray blue? Well you know what I think we are. We're giving wonderful all right, Well that was mine.

That was incredible.

Wow, this is hard to do. This.

Third, I just have to say, because you guys are so good at this.

No, we're setting you up for success, and I want you to chime in on mine after I'm done.

We're during please.

Please okay, okay, So this is have you ever done someone's then they you've done what they were going to do.

No never, I was sweating, oh yours because I have a little bit of cross over tinyments. Okay, really that's Goodmatically tied.

Here is bone Yang's don't think so, honey, his time starts now. I don't think so, honey. Standards and practices, we should be able to say at least five ships and five bucks on SNL per season because after this whole ego otam miss Aggy, because these men ain't want ship moment first of all, favorite moment of televised absolutely ever. Second of all, we are so hampered in our comedy at SNL by not being able to say shit and fucks. Lest To and I talk about this all the time.

It's like, we can you give SNL an exception, an exemption, like if we're dismantling the FCC because of Trump, Like, can we at least.

Can one boon? Can one can one silver lining be that we get to say shit and fuck? And I'm even keeping it to an allotment to an allotted five and five five ships, five bucks. It would make it would bring a sketch to the next level. It would it would it would make it so that you would be able to like know, oh, this is the real world, that's not the heightened sketch reality. Shit and fuck are so comedically powerful as words. I really think it would help us. And that's one minute. Yes, so.

I don't think anything came down, which I love, and Ago is like, no, here hilarious, so funny.

Don't you agree? When have it been this much more fun?

And I'm going to say, NBC, I think you can monetize this, Yes, why don't you have a competition and people can vote like American Idol as to which cast member gets to say the ship Oh my god, if you want to say it, you know zero zero three too on your phone and let Bowen.

Say thank you, or if you want to monetize it in a way that is like I don't know, like go fundme coded, like just have a fundraiser for our FCC fines and just help us cover our fines for the five ships and the five bucks that we get to say.

You know, who should get to say it? Like whenever he decides to stop Keenan on his last episode. The whole ninety minute should just be him saying, whatever the.

Well, you can treat it like vacation days.

You don't use it, and it rolls over to the next year. And then you used to say ten of them yes exactly Saturday and rack them up. I really like that. I never understood, and I actually I don't understand because you can say you can say dick on the show.

It may offer one small counterpoint, yes please. I do think there's something fun about not being able to say it that causes comedic tension. Of course fun so you it may the air may be let out of that your balloon when you do, and you might not get.

The juice that you wanted to use. You want it because you can't have it. I feel like sh it's not even really a curse word anymore. Come on, Like over time, it's like who is actually bothered? If their kids says ship? Who was actually bothered? Right? Fuck? I understand is one thing. It's like it's it's it's a I guess still it's a little taboo. But like ship an ass well, you can say ass you can't say asshole.

Yeah, you can say taint, but you can't know you can you can't say tane because it's a part of the body.

Oh you can't.

Yeah, we've we've had we've had standards notes on this. You can say, you can say taint, but you can't say like tat goots or whatever, you know what I mean, because it's like it's not anatomically precise unless.

The musical guess is named good and then you can say ladies and gentlemen good once.

Again, that would be that would be a hack. Anyway. That's that's my, that's my. Oh yeah, that's a good one. Okay, Okay, this is a moment listen. Okay is that okay, Yes, that's okay.

Let me see, let me see all right, I'm ready, I'm ready.

So this is Amy Polars. I don't think so honey. Her time starts now. Okay, I don't think so honey.

Horror movies, okay, Okay. Life is scary enough. I do not need to unlock a new fear. I have a very active amygdala. I have a decent amount of empathy.

I do not want to watch a young couple have to eat their own eyeballs to get out of a locked room, okay, And don't tell me that it's about the rush of being in the same room with people and feeling social, because if you want to get that kind of like social bonding, you need to go to church, not a horror movie. And by the way, church is another thing that I don't go to anymore as an adult because I've realized it's not for me.

Yes, there's three things that shorten your life.

Motorcycle, I agree with you, smoking and violent images.

And then lastly, this also means pranks. No pranks. A jump scare in a prank is a hate crime. If you prank me, that means you hate me.

The only devil that I want to see on the screen is the one that wears pradact You, Sulent, I am.

With you everywhere hard. I went to go see the movie Drop No. But can I say I advocate for this movie because it wasn't and this is an all positivity, it wasn't that scary.

It was a thrilling, suspenseful not violent. You're talking about violent images.

No, Yes, I am telling you.

I don't like any kind of scare.

No scary. When people die in a movie, it's sad. The world is too scary, the news is rough.

I cannot handle my my nervous system cannot handle it, and I could never handle it. And I just want to say this, I did participate in pranks at one point in my life. The patriarchy comes for all of us. Yeah, we all, but I apologize and I have listened and learned, and no more pranks for me.

Honestly, we don't do We don't prank it. Have you ever pranked? You know the No, And I want to say I would never do that to you. This is a real call out.

There were some Instagram accounts Diet Prada did a whole April Fools thing of like this is the casting of the Britney Spears biopic Aria Grande Troy Sivat, and people thought it was real and I'm like, April Fools, let's just no.

More right now.

We can't afford it. No, no, no, we can't because.

People really don't know anymore what's feeling, what's fake and so to have a whole day of like fake as.

But like when you look at the movies, it's like you what do you want to see the gorge or baby in the basket.

It's like am I like, is this a punishment? Well, yes, I mean it's literally I think it's well, there's a whole community of people whose whole thing is like I'm gonna go watch these movies where, like with The Final Girl of It All, I knows six or seventy young women are dead. No, no, when people die. You ever see the movie Zodiac? I did see tough for me because there's that one horrible scene. I know, he comes and murders the couple in broad daylight. I know, are

God, why do we have to make everything a movie about everything?

True crime is so nasty?

Why do we have to make If it was bad and it happened, let's not make a movie about it.

We can read about it. We can listen to podcasts about it. See, but the podcasts are even worse sometimes because then it's like it's all happening in your head. You fill in the gaps image about true crime.

Okay, So I had a moment, a true crime moment because I'm a white lady of a certain age. So I did have a true crime moment. But I can't watch anything I see. I can read, read, or listen. But I can't watch anything that's about true crime, like any of those daily any and even softy stuff like softball stuff, like I cannot watch it.

The softy stuff count as does like cult stuff count as softy stuff.

Cult a cult documentary, Well.

That one isn't as bad, but I don't understand people that join cults.

I can't relate even as Yeah, I was going to say, you have a high cult sensibility. I'm probably the closest I did.

Like the one where the one yeah, because mother is resting is when she asked for the chicken parmesan.

I was just going to say, and this is my He doesn't watch it, but I'm like my selling point to him is like there's this whole segment in an episode where they go through her recipes like galactic taco salad.

I asked for a bottle job. These people like, where's my chicken bat? Like it's amazing.

The term mother is resting is incredible. I just like walking in wingings and everyone is sitting by her bed and it's like, I don't get it.

I don't get it.

It's tough. I just didn't want to see when I heard it actually dead and blue in the Yeah, that was really hard for my head around watching.

Culture tough, But when a woman's in charge, it's.

A little bit more fun. That is why it's fun. I even get scared of like urban legends and conspiracy theories.

Also, like when I was a kid, no spooky stories. I didn't be like being scared. I didn't like I do not like that feeling.

Oh there was show Are You Afraid of the Dark. This was on Nickelodeon when I was a kid, and there was one episode with Tiya and Tamara, who I love. The storyline was one of them gets like cursed and turns it into a lizard, and then the lizard becomes the other one, so like so it was this crazy situation where was it scary. One of them was a lizend and one of them was a real girl, and

Okay, come on, it would be my absolute joy if you've been killing it, and I mean truly.

The advice you know, we talked about advice before we leave. Any advice for me, don't change a thing about it. Okay.

The reason we've done this for so long is because it's basically formally the same thing as episode one. Don't add too many bells and whistles. I was going to say, what you've innovated on in the podcast is starting out with that panel discussion with the people who know your guest.

I'm like, that's so damn it. That's really fun. Smart, and just keep it exactly the same. Don't change your thing.

Don't overthink it.

That's the think. And also like over time we accumulated more people because we started as like you know, you started it, and immediately it was like the the like everyone came and like you know, started listening. But over time people started to have like notes for it. And that's when you're like, oh, that's because everyone's gonna want

Last Culture Racis is the production by Will Ferrell's Big Money Players and iHeart Radio.

Podcasts, created and hosted by Matt Rodgers and Bowen Yeg executive produced by Anna Hasnier and

Produced by Becker Ramos, edited mixed by Doug Bami and Nikla Board and our music is by Henry Komerski