all right. Well welcome back to the interview room. Here at, come with Casey. We are super excited today to be joined by a very special guest who is going to, um,
I've been so excited for this interview, as soon as we start doing interviews, this was like the one I was the most excited for. All
right, so I'm gonna read this off. I'm gonna try to do this the best I can. This is, this is Margo Underwood that we're talking to you right now. So, uh, Margot pronouns, they and them is a certified sexuality intimacy coach. Somatic somatic sex educator in training who specializes in embodied consent and authentic relations.
In addition to embodied sex coaching sessions, they offer deeply intimate journeys that are informed by various wisdom traditions under their new business, coalescent Coaching L L C. Some of their passions are leading holistic rope bondage education in providing. Potentially cathartic journeys through rope with clients and members of their community. They've been in the Dallas Poly, BDSM and mindfulness communities in Dallas for over three years.
Additionally, they lead two regular events, the Queer Temple Gathering and Fuse, which is fostering United sexual energy in person for individuals who have the desire to build an intentional community around authenticity and alternative. Of processing emotion in the body. Holy shit. That was a lot to read, and that's
why you did it.
I got through it. That All right, Margo. Well welcome to the show. Thank
you so much for having me. I'm excited to be on a podcast. It's been a while. Yeah. Um, yeah, it's inspiring. Honestly. I'm like, I should pick my podcast Back up. Y'all know how this market is so
Look, listen, we have this, this unique opportunity to like, because we both have certain days off and we get to just sit here and. Bullshit with each other. Yeah, talk about all things sex kink and help introduce a lot of people to it. It's been a blast for us. So I mean, have you got the opportunity? I can, yeah.
It's really fun. I'm glad y'all are doing it and that you have someone to conversate with too. A hundred percent. And yeah, like
he was saying a little bit is just far as like us really trying to like bridge that gap. For couples to get them to, because a lot of our audience, they're very curious. Um, but just kind of like helping them understand what the difference is between just like. You know, normal sex and kinks versus like how you can explore that not only with yourself but together. And so that's why we really love having you on, cuz this is a topic that we get asked mm-hmm. quite frequently on.
And it, we just don't have enough history to really answer these questions and so for you to be on and, and helping us today. Love it. Yeah,
absolutely. Um, hey, real quick, I see that you have this giant rig behind you, that thing is badass.
Thanks. So my little rig, I have two rigs. That's a little one. This one's
little
This one is so little and it's perfect for my house. Um, Yeah. I found it on Fe Life. This guy was selling it for like $250 and I was like, give it to me right now. I'll go pick it up. Um, and it was when I first started getting into suspension, so I didn't want anything like too expensive. Um, cause I was like, what if I end up hating doing rope a year from now? So I got that and then I just. Recently bought a new rig that's metal and it's more transportable. It goes in a bag.
Um, and it gets up to about 15 feet high. Damn. Wow.
Okay. So that is a little guy then
Okay, I get it. Yeah. It's my, my little baby. But I love, I love it. It looks good with the interior of my house too. It really
does. Yeah. Okay, so then, all right, let's jump right into this. Tell us. a little bit about your background. How did you discover, um, your love for suspension and, and rope play, and how did you get to where you are now in terms of your, your knowledge and expertise?
So, wow, I joined Fe life. I ended, this was a, gosh, what year was this? I wanna say somewhere closer to like 20. 18, I got out of a relationship. and um, just started exploring like kinky dating websites. Fe life popped up. I joined Fe Life and this guy, I was living in Hawaii at the time, this guy and really good friend of mine now reached out and gave me like all these tips about how to stay safe. Like don't give your personal email. Yeah, don't give your personal phone number out.
Um, we met up, had coffee and he was the. Shibari rope teacher on the big island. Okay. It's a really small community, so he was kind of the guy. Um, and he had asked me if I wanted to do, or if I wanted to be his demo to try out rope. Um, and he took me to my first lifestyle party. Uh, we did some demos together and I just, like, I felt, I felt my exhibitionist come out. I felt like I loved how the rope looked. Um, on my skin, on my body.
And from that moment I was just like, I wanna learn everything Just
dive right into
Ella, right? Yeah. And he was a good friend. Um, really good. um, took it slow with me in terms of like, introducing rope into my life. Like, didn't just like throw me in a suspension. Um, really taught me like the fundamentals, single column, double column, do it over and over and over again, and then we'll start learning some different patterns. Mm-hmm. But I moved away from Hawaii and started just taking my own education into my own hands.
Um, I discovered this website called crash dash crash hyphen restraint.com. It's a free website that topology top the topologist on, um, fe life created for people who are looking for free re resources around rope. Oh, cool. So it gives you, like, it tracks your. Goes through all the fundamentals, tells you about what rope, um, material is best for you, how long it lasts, how to care for the rope, um, different dangers and nerve education on there.
Yeah. Um, and then I slowly started reaching out to other resources like rope study and shibari study and then, um, going to the public, dun. Here. This took a
lot of time for you to learn all this. You were, I mean, I love the investment that you put in Yeah. Right. So getting all this information, cuz it's not like you can just go to your public library and like pull everything out or go to your local community college and take a class on it. You know what I mean? Like you really had to like dive into it.
Yeah. That was. like I, and, and I was going to dungeon events as well, but like getting out of the house and going to the dungeon and going to a class, um, is a lot more work than doing classes online. Um, or just studying online. Mm-hmm. Um, but it, you do get to put that practical knowledge to use, which was nice. Um, so I, I did a lot of my, uh, work, um, online and then, Last year I went to Bali and um, well before that I had met a woman based out of Austin.
Now her name's Rena. She, um, she is, uh, a role model for me. She was talking about shibari in a way that, and I just wanna preface this by saying, ChAARI Shibari is not the right pronunciation, and I apologize to anyone who is listening to this recording, um, who feels offended by the way that I am, uh, pronouncing it. It's actually shibari. Um, okay. And so sh uh, she was talking about rope in the way that I, uh, really have developed a relationship towards it as more of this.
Meditative practice, a more mindfulness practice. And she told me about a guy she was trained by in Bali. I ended up going to Bali last year and doing a mentorship with him for five weeks. Wow. And um, really like taking what I liked from his practice and adding that to my own. And then, r like, um, really enriching the things that I already had in my practice and, and feeling really validated in those things too by seeing them and not just one person.
Now two people doing very similar rope practices. Um, and so that's kind of where my training officially actually, um, not officially ended, but that was one of the last big things I did for myself.
Damn it. Okay, so you've been doing, clearly been doing this for a while, and so the, what's, what is you, do you feel, because I, what I heard in there was you talking about it being more of like a meditative thing. You know, we meet a lot of people who talk about rope play in terms of like the sexuality behind it and how, how much couples can use it in the bedroom. Tell me a little bit more about this, like meditative meditation that you use it for, like what sort of experience?
And how is that something that you like to incorporate into your, I mean, daily, weekly, or however often you practice? Mm-hmm.
So, goodness. I'm like trying to think of when it started becoming that for me. Um, and it was, I think it was when I was mostly bottoming for rope because now I mostly top for rope. Mm-hmm. and top for most things. I came in as the bottom and then switch, and now I'm mostly top the
pipeline Right. So let's, let's clarify a little bit because we do have a lot of listen listeners that are not, uh, up with a lot of lingo whenever it comes to these things. Could you do us a favor and talk about, uh, bottom versus.
Yeah. So I use bottom because it's like really general. Mm-hmm. And it would be similar to someone saying, oh, I'm a sub. Yeah. Um, just as top would be to Dom. Okay. But. I use bottom because it's like I'm not held to any of the ideas that are, um, stuck to the word sub or submissive. Like a bottom is just like, yeah, I'm receiving okay. From this person. And a top is like, I'm giving to this person.
Okay. So less on like the level of like power exchange? Yeah. Versus more of just giving and receiving. Okay.
Cool. I like that. I've actually not heard it fully explained in that. because I hear bottom quite frequently, and then you hear submissive or sub quite frequently. Mm-hmm. But to kinda understand the difference of that. Yeah. I love that.
Yeah. Just removes, it's kind of like gender roles, just like remove some of that expectation, um, and power dynamic from clay. Especially if you're like just getting to know someone. Yeah. Um, oh my goodness. So yeah, as a bottom, When people would put rope on me, I would notice how much desire I had to close my eyes and sink into the sensations of my body. And, um, in doing that, I would also get lost in my breath and I would start breathing faster and deeper and even sometimes more shallow.
Um, slower. Uh, and so it just became like very meditative in that way. I would almost go into these trans, like states that some people would consider subspace. Mm-hmm. Um, but I was still very conscious during, and I don't really fall into a subspace where I go non-verbal. Yeah. Um, so now, uh, as a top I was like, dang, I really like, how do I create that experience for other people? But like, emphasize that experience, not just make it like a byproduct of rope.
So that's when I started leaning into breath and movement and touch and sound and sight and emphasizing on the senses. Yeah. and then inviting rope in as a way to manipulate all of those senses and heighten those senses and create a story inside someone's body rather than everything that's going on outside of a person. Um, and so now I really only do that type of rope with people who want to do a rope journey with me.
So there's a. two hour long consultation that goes into that before we even go into the rope journey. Um, or I do that type of rope with my close friends or my play partners or my partners. And it is especially fun when I get to do it with my play partners or partners because I don't really have to go through such strict negotiations and such strict guidelines for our play. And I just get to like, it's like a playground.
I just get to ravage that person, throw 'em around, growl in their ear, tighten or do a soft, you know, there's so many different, um, Like emotions that you can draw out in a person.
Yeah. Especially with having that much closer of a relationship, it allows you to kind of engage in them in a way that you can't with someone that has a more service relationship. So I mean, I can get on board with that for sure.
Exactly. I mean, there's something very like just passionate about being able to open up and allow someone to take over in that way. I mean, I think that's one of my. biggest attractions to even, um, rope play in that sense is one, the meditative side of it. Like we do yoga all the time. Like I, I'm working very hard on trying to get, to be able to meditate, but I can totally see why or how being in, in a rope act can allow you, you almost feel like it's like a blanket almost. Mm-hmm.
I would imagine. I, I, I haven't had, I haven't experienced something I'm very interested in experiencing. but definitely for the like, meditative portion of it, that, that's what I think is my, like biggest attraction. Mm-hmm. So I I love that. That's like a big side
effect to it. Yeah. It's, and like when I say meditative, like when we, when like in the western world, when we hear the word meditate, we think of like someone who's like really still and breathing and letting go of all of these thoughts. the meditative state that I'm trying to create within, um, my play scenes with rope is like finding stillness amongst the chaos because there is so much happening to you and but still coming back into your center and allowing the world around you to.
just be just like, accept what's going on around you. And like you said, it is, there's a lot of trust that goes into that for sure. Especially if I'm invoking my fire and I'm really trying to like get them angry. Mm-hmm. or if I am invoking my water and, and trying to be more sensual and soft. Mm-hmm. So would you say
that you go over almost like a checklist of like Yes and. Um, now I would imagine that's probably what like the two hour long consult or consultation is, is kind of figuring that out. But do you have any big ones that you would be like, okay, maybe this actually isn't for you. Like, that's almost like a red flag and maybe this wouldn't be an act that you would be super interested in.
Oh, absolutely. Yeah. That's why we have the, the consultation. because I have to have some level of freedom, um, within those journeys. Mm-hmm. So there's not, I used to do checklists. This was before I. started offering them as journeys. Um, and it was actually, that was like more for my professional domination. So there was a lot of other things involved, but I don't have a checklist for these types of consultations.
Now. It's more like, the first question is like, so like, tell me who you are. Like mm-hmm. I need to underst. Stand your brain a little bit, and then we get into like, why did you, um, start looking for me in the first place? Mm-hmm. why this particular offering other than my sex coaching or my sacred intimacy journey, um, what are you looking to get out of this experience? And what kind of experiences do you have in this realm already?
Um, and so it's really fun to sometimes we, they start talking about like their past or their past relationships or like, you know, maybe they haven't been in a relationship for a long time and they just need to feel. some sort of fire, some sort of ignite. Mm-hmm. Um, there are a lot of different reasons that people might choose to do a journey. Um, so that, that's why that two hour consultation is like flushing it out. Like, let's really get down to Yeah. What you're looking for.
File through some of those layers and figure out like, hey, let's, let's, let's get you not only to do that, but like, I would assume to like understand like what you are about to embark
on. Mm-hmm. Exactly. Yeah. That. Another part is explaining my process, um, and explaining the level of freedom that I need. Uh, and it's building rapport too, just gaining trust with each other. And sometimes that two hour consultation goes to a four hours. I say, I mean,
Yeah. As a law you gotta like dive in and, and figure out. Cause like I said, there could be people that aren't just quite candidates for Right. You know, a type of act like
that. Mm-hmm. Yeah. And typically people who are doing this with me already have experience. Mm-hmm. in one way or another, maybe not specifically with rope, but they've been, they've been around kink, they're familiar with kink, they've been to, uh, sexuality workshops or retreats, and so they're familiar with that type of energy. Yeah. Very cool. So,
I'm actually super interested in. Well, I guess one of my big questions and one that we have received a lot cuz we run this podcast, but we also have an Instagram page and on this page we get common asked questions. Oh yeah, this was one that like really stood out. Um, so why is it the suspension within rope tie and why do those sometimes, or always go hand in hand? I guess not always, but why is there su a suspension level to rope play?
Hmm. Wow. Well, you know, I think that. So, hold on, let me think about this for a minute, because obviously like I didn't come up with that idea. Oh yeah, yeah. But I know a little bit about the history, um, and I do know that. Back during World War ii, um, in the pleasure quarters of Japan, um, sex workers were using rope as part of their performances in, in these burlesque bars or in these sexy, um, sexy buildings, whatever you wanna call them. Um, and.
I don't really know if suspension was a part of that. Could have been. Um, but there's not a lot of like footage or photography of like what was going on there. And so the, the history of suspension, like where it originates, it's probably fuzzy and the whole journey of shabadi and kimba and. Western style fusion rope bondage.
It all kind of gets a little muddied because, um, you know, some people say it started, um, in ha in, uh, person to person combat during, uh, in, during what was called ho jujitsu, um, or for what was called ho jujitsu, which was a, a style of martial arts. And then, but some people believe. Sex workers had been doing that long before then, or you know, how do we know sex workers were inspired by that? So, the origins get a little hazy.
Um, but I do know that once it started flourishing, uh, the Japanese started adapting it as a form of art. And so adding, I mean, you have rope on a person and you see a rafter, you're just like, that's, that should work. This might look really cool.
naturally it's just going Alright. Appreciation No, I totally get that. See, I, but I, I love these layers to it, right. We talk with people who are like, oh my God, you know, I like tying my wife up. I like tying my husband up. And, but they, the purpose with it, it's such like, there's this very like just sexual power play kind of thing. I wanna restrain you and then we're gonna, we're just gonna have a bunch of like, wild kicking sex because you're restrained and to add those layers to it.
The meditative layer to it, the, the one that really like brings you together and connects you, creates such a, a better. Better, but such a different atmosphere, such a unique atmosphere for somebody in the bedroom, that if we can get that message through to some of the people listening to the show that, hey, listen, if you're looking at restraints, if you're looking at some sort of rope play, um, go beyond just the surface level.
I'm go, you know, I'm gonna bind your hands together while we fuck, versus I'm, we're gonna actually experience something together that's going to bring us into this deeper connection. If you can access that level of it, you can enhance your sex. exponentially.
I like to look at it as a form of contact dancing, where you're, you're moving with your partner, y'all aren't letting go really, and like falling out of that. You're always in contact with them. Um, I use. The elements in my practice, I, I invoke the wisdom of fire, water, earth, and air, and each one carries a different energy and emotion with it. So if I'm, uh, wanting to, to add some fire to my rope session, then I'm gonna go fast.
I'm gonna grab them really hard and jerk them around and push 'em. And then if I wanna add in some more sensual, water, emotional, um, energy. Then I'm gonna slow it down. I'm gonna press the rope deeper and drag it. And maybe soft caressing, um, movement that feels more like water. Um, and it does end up creating this kind of odyssey that you both get to experience.
That's cool. I think that creates like so much more to it, like I love that because that, to me, I hear that and I personally interpret it as something along the lines of, if I were going to be doing something like this, this allows me to.
I almost have like a, a, a bag, I don't wanna say bag of tricks, but cuz I feel like that's disrespectful, but But it allows you to have this like way of, of kind of guiding your decisions on where you want to be throughout a session, and you're able to kind of dip into those various elements and go, all right, this helps me guide my session around. And it helps me, you know, take my partner to where I, I feel like this journey should go.
Yeah. It, it's like a lot of what I'm mentioning and what we're talking about today can be applied to so many different, um, like forms of kink. Mm-hmm. you can invoke fire and water when you're doing impact play if you wanted to. Um, and I think it really comes down to like finding your style and not. Just going through those rote movements that you see in porn or that you see in books. Like really like, and I think I found I, it would've probably taken me longer to find my style had I not.
done. Professional domination. Mm-hmm. because I had to, I thought I had to fit into this role of like, what does a professional dominatrix look like? A skinny white girl wearing latex. And I had to be all like primi proper and all like sadistic and weird and. I slowly started realizing, I'm like, this is not me. This does not feel good to me. I wanna be authentic with these people.
Um, and so as my work progressed, I'm wearing boxer shorts and a tank top and, um, doing whatever I wanna do in that session the way that I wanna do it, and that is what turned people on so much more. Is really being able to see me. Mm-hmm. take control in my element rather than trying to fit into something that just felt clunky.
Absolutely. That that discovery of self-identity, especially in a space like that, is such a liberating feeling, first of all. And then you watch to see how it draws people into you because now they're seeing this just authentic version of you out there doing what you love to do most. and people are attracted to it, like mm-hmm. Well also
just love how self-aware you are too, you know? Mm-hmm. to, to be in an environment like that and then be like, okay, I, I like this, but maybe I just need to like, shift it a little bit into something new, something that's me. Um, I, I mean, I super admire that. I mean, I admire everything you do.
Aww. super not turned on
right now. I'm just kidding.
like that would just not
be, it's
totally
fine. that I would be so worried if you were
Okay. So, yeah. Um, let's see, what else do we have here, Carrie, I don't
wanna talk about few. Amita, can we, are we allowed to? I really wanna talk.
Oh, yeah, we can talk about it. Okay.
Yes. Let's switch gears a little bit. Let's shift it. And actually that's, that's good timing because we're already sitting here talking about how you take people on these journeys. So you have a few different programs that you do, but the big one we wanna bring attention to is Fuse. So go ahead, take some time as, as much as you need to introduce us to what it's. Cool.
So Fuse is this idea that I had, my neurons were firing things and then it manifested into real life one day. Uh, I called it Fuse. Um, because I'm bringing together all of these different, um, ideas like the idea of Western Westernized Tan, the idea of westernized kink. Um, e uh, ecstatic dance is another concept kind of idea that we're pulling in.
Um, and it is, it originally started as a collective, as something that I wanted to really start building a community here in Dallas that was, um, built on solid ethics and. Um, so we threw our inaugural event in November. We had about 25 people, participants. Um, that's good. Completely sold out. Um, and the three components of FUSE is community, quality, sexuality, education, and um, play.
So being able to engage in an environment with other people who are showing up, um, raw and real and authentic without, like, we, like had mentioned falling into those like rote movements of like, this is what I'm supposed to be at Fuse. We really encourage people to try on different hats, like mm-hmm. you. Try to be that dominatrix or you can try something else. If that doesn't work for you, set it down, pick it up. Um, and then providing an educational piece.
So right now we have a level one and a level two. The level one really emphasizes embodied consent and authentic relation, authentic communication. embodied. The embodied consent that we are pulling from is inspired by Dr. Betty Martin, um, who I'm sure y'all are familiar with. She came up with the wheel of consent. Mm-hmm. and that inspires a lot of the games that we play throughout the event. And then we also were inspired by Sarah Ness, who established authentic Revolution.
Uh, I believe she has stepped down and is clo is no longer doing, um, authentic revolution, but creating space for, for something else to come forward. She created authentic relat. Which is this language of, uh, how to describe your inner experience, um, in congruence with your outer experience when you're, when you're connecting with other people.
So it really just takes what you have inside and it offers it to other people in a way where someone can appreciate it, they can accept it and, and indulge in it, or they can say, no thank you, and you just are like, awesome. I'm really glad that I got to show it to you though, um, in a place that was free of judgment, free of ridicule. Um, So Fuse one focuses on really building that common language, the consent, the authentic communication, um, and it ends with a play party.
FUSE two is more focused on play. We're gonna have, um, an expert come in for each Fuse two to talk about. For example, primal Play is our first Fuse two. And so all of the games that we play throughout the event are gonna be focused on. Learning about primal play without necessarily that classroom feel. Um, and then just to like reiterate, everything that we do at Fuse is either a game or play. So there's lots of like creative energy, lots of different connections that we're making. Um, and.
allowing for mistakes, uh, to happen, um, is another huge piece because that's like, I want this to be not a scary place for people, but a place where they're like, okay, I, if I mess up, it's gonna be okay. Mm-hmm. Yeah. The community will hold me. And they'll show me the right way, right? Mm-hmm. Yeah. I think that people
get a little bogged in their head that like, I'm gonna mess up or I'm gonna do it wrong, or I'm not gonna be accepted. But that's one thing that we have really, truly come to like understand with this community is y'all are so nice, like so patient and so nice and it's just, you know, beforehand. Or whatever. 10 years ago, I never would've thought that like this is a hundred percent where we would've been.
And it's just been so accepting and that's one thing that like with these functions that y'all are having to just maybe normalize it a little bit more or help the individuals understand that their normal is normal Mm-hmm. and it's completely okay. Mm-hmm.
Yeah. That was how I felt when I first started going to the Dungeons and found Kink. And Fuse is held at a private, uh, residential space, so it's removed from the dungeon environment. Doesn't quite have that like dark, scary feel to it. Mm-hmm. um, uh, and it's, it's actually the house that we're doing it in. Floor to ceiling windows. The windows are designed so that rainbows refract through the whole house. Um, it's just like a really like.
it's an environment that's designed for like open energy, just breath and light and air and emotion. Um, rather than a dungeon, just kind of, there's not that, that piece of, um, emotional processing that can really happen in, in such a dark, enclosed area.
Interesting. I think you should explain what a dungeon is. We know what a dungeon is, but let's go there. I want to hear like a pretty good explanation of a dungeon in the best way that you can, cuz again, we have viewers that have
no idea what that is. Yeah, and so to clarify, like when I mean by emotional processing mm-hmm. you can process a motion anywhere you are, right? Mm-hmm. But at Fuse we really encourage and create space for people to talk about what is happening in them throughout the whole event. Mm-hmm. so that we can all process together and hold each other in that experience. And so that's what I meant. Didn't wanna, like I. cloud that because you can definitely have emotional experiences at Dungeons.
Mm-hmm. um, to describe a dungeon, it's really just like a space that someone has rented, um, or owns mm-hmm. um, where you have B D S M furniture, so either. you know, St. Andrews cross, you'll have mm-hmm. rigs like this where you can suspend people, maybe sex swings. I've seen a throne where someone can sit on their throne and be worshiped. Um, walls of chains. There's a lot of fun stuff. Spanking benches. um, cages that you can call. It's like a sneaky of sex It's fun. It's very fun.
Seems like what,
what most people would consider whenever they hear like a sex dungeon or, or just a dungeon in general. It's that, that first picture that pops in their head, that kind of stereotypical mm-hmm.
what? The red room, whatever that was called, Yeah. It is. It is. And it kind of is that like, not gonna lie, It looks like that, but then it doesn't, like when you get in there, it's just like you're just with people. Yeah. And it's not it's not like you're with a bunch of, you know, demons or
anything. It's, it's not the ambience that you would see that you'd feel with like the puffing music and all of the, yeah.
Yes, exactly.
Use tendency created through the lens of like a director, Mm-hmm.
So if, if our viewers wanted to get just a little bit more insight on, on rope and, uh, play, where should they begin? Right? Like where, where would be the safest playfulness way for them
to start? Hmm. Well, I would definitely check out any local rope events because the one here in Dallas at the DFW dungeon, um, is, that's the one I've attended most frequent. Um, they have lights on during the rope class. It's de it definitely has a learning environment feel to it. Cool. Rather than sex party feel. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Um, so you might wanna try out a local dungeon or a local rope. Um, Collective in your area to talk with people and get that hands-on experience.
I had also mentioned crash hyphen restraint.com, which is not free resource that gives you, um, videos and descriptions on different ties is, and then. The one, I'm pretty sure it's called Rope Study. Mm-hmm. dot com. They have a really good nerve resource for people who are like kind of scared. What if I hurt someone's nerves and their arms and their hands? It's a great resource. And then shibari studies a personal favorite. Okay. Um, that one you do have to pay for. it's not that expensive.
Maybe $200 a year. Um, but their videos are high, very high quality, and their teachers are world renowned. Okay,
that's perfect. See, there you go. Awesome. You know, whenever we hear things or people are like, just gonna dive right in. And we always tell 'em like, pull back for a second. Yeah. You know, I've had friends who haven't, don't, haven't even used restraints yet, and they're like, I'm going straight into rope play and we're going, that's probably not the best or safest idea. Uh, this is like me, I put my doctor hat on, I'm like, You can cause some damage like softness or nerve damage.
Absolutely. Mm-hmm. let's go ahead and pull back and figure out a way that you guys can incorporate this. So just the fact that you even have to name those resources is gonna help a ton of people who are wanting to get further into that space. Um, who either have tried some sort of bondage or have tried some sort of restraint system. Um, whether it be like the basic, you know, under the bed ones or off the door and move on to something like rope play mm-hmm.
And do it in a way that's, you know, more responsible but allows them to. Freed and, and liberating.
Mm-hmm. I have one word of advice is like, instead of focusing on the restraint aspect, focus on. what it feels like to just start incorporating rope. Like how does it feel to just drag rope on your partner's skin and squeeze them close to you and a along their neck? Like what is that? How does that change the dynamic? And um, that's where you start finding your style. Yeah.
Okay. So really go through and engage in the senses. A lot of that, like texture play or pressure play. Mm-hmm. I love it. Awesome. well, you got, you feel like you have something running through your head?
No, I mean, I do, but unfortunately we're get like, I could probably talk to you for hours, truthfully. Well, we're going to, um, actually eventually, yes. Um, yeah, I mean, do you have any more questions or anything that we wanted? To talk about. I think we kind of covered, you know, everything that we wanna talk about within this
interview. I think we're solid, honestly. Mm-hmm. Um, so th that mean another good interview, like the thank you for your time. If, if people want to get in touch with you or they wanna learn more about this, uh, how can they reach out to you or even just start to, to follow you.
So you can find me at my website. Mm-hmm. at coalescing.me. C O A L E S C I N g.me. Um, that's where you'll find all of my offerings and a contact form if you wanted to email me. Um, and you'll find the fuse events on there as. You can also find me on Instagram coalescent Coaching, C O A L E s C E N T Coaching. Perfect. Um, and that's, those are pretty much the only like social medias I'm on right now. I mean, that's one, um, but I'm always answering emails, so feel free to reach out that way.
Okay, perfect.
Well, awesome. Well, we heard, well, you heard it. We're gonna make sure that we have, uh, all your contact information and everything that was mentioned in the show today. You'll be able to find, uh, links to, and, uh, I mean, I guess for another episode to come with Casey. I'm Dr. Casey Sanders. And I'm Carrie Sanders. We'll see you y'all next time.