This week, Kristin and I tackle one of the most frustrating—and frankly absurd—things we’ve seen online in a while: the claim that doctors want people to stay sick just so we can make more money. Yup, that’s a real thing someone said, and it sparked a Twitter firestorm. We’re diving into the bizarre world of social media influencers who spread medical misinformation with the confidence of a med school dropout turned life coach. If you’ve ever wanted to yell into the void, this episode’s for you....
Jul 01, 2025•53 min
Step right up to the medieval ophthalmology booth where your chalazion gets cured with garlic, mustard seeds, and just a dash of cow bile. This week, I take you on a Renaissance Festival-style journey through the weirdest eye treatments in history and how some of those relics have been rebranded for the modern wellness crowd. There’s leech therapy, eye “massagers,” and influencers promising vision miracles with homeopathic potions that would make a 13th-century snake oil vendor proud. Also: how ...
Jun 26, 2025•50 min
This week, I’m solo, but not alone. I’m joined by Dr. Kaveh Hoda, a fellow medical satirist who brings the same energy I try to harness every time I put on a white coat and immediately start roasting the healthcare system. We talk shop about using humor to cope with burnout, the risks and rewards of medical satire, and why sometimes it’s more effective to joke than to rant. And yes, we draft sphincters. Real ones. The best ones. It’s unhinged, unfiltered, and surprisingly educational. Takeaways:...
Jun 24, 2025•1 hr 8 min
This one’s personal. I'm finally talking about the private equity takeover of medicine—and why Oregon might've just taken the first real step to stop it. We’re diving into the gray zone between burnout and buyouts, why docs sell their practices, and what that means for patients (spoiler: it’s not great). I also share some zingers for a classic surgeon roast and finally explain that weird thing your optic nerves do in the middle of your brain. And yeah, I really do look like I just rolled out of ...
Jun 19, 2025•50 min
We thought we were just going kayaking with a group of young adults facing cancer and chronic illness. What we didn’t expect was how much First Descents—and its late CEO Ryan O’Donoghue—would completely reshape the way we think about healing, connection, and purpose. This week, we’re reflecting on that powerful experience and the legacy Ryan left behind. Also: I get dragged into a dating game scenario, and we talk about how being on call might just be the worst setup for a first date. Ever. Take...
Jun 17, 2025•53 min
Let’s get one thing out of the way: I’m not mad you called me at 2 a.m. about an eye. Really, I’m not. But also… were they just missing their glasses? This week, I’m tackling everything that drives ophthalmologists crazy—and how to avoid becoming that story we tell over drinks. From wild consults and missing visual acuity checks to what actually makes an emergency worth a call, I’m handing you the crash course med school never gave you. Plus: a retina saga, a hot muffler, and why I’ll never be a...
Jun 12, 2025•47 min
In this episode, Kristin shares what it felt like to take the stage for a major speaking event—and all the nerves, insights, and surprising audience connections that came with it. We also dive into some brain-bending eye science about tetrachromacy (a potential new color?!) and, of course, take a moment to roast the absolute rollercoaster of comments we get on YouTube. Spoiler: some are heartfelt, some are hilarious, and some definitely make us question our entire internet presence. Takeaways: K...
Jun 10, 2025•55 min
I just wanted to talk about the iris today. A chill, colorful muscle donut that controls how much light hits your retina and makes you look good doing it. But no. UnitedHealthcare had to show up first—again—with a story so dark it makes retinal necrosis look like a fairy tale. We're talking Do Not Resuscitate orders getting denied by algorithms and patients dying because no human was watching. Then we finally pivot to the iris: how it works, how it fails, why it looks different in everyone, and ...
Jun 05, 2025•46 min
There’s vulnerable… and then there’s telling thousands of listeners about the time you almost pooped your pants at a conference. In this episode, we’re going there. We’re talking about digestive drama, poop shame, and why gut issues are so much more than a punchline. Kristin and I also dive into ARFID—Avoidant/Restrictive Food Intake Disorder—and how it often starts with childhood trauma around food and bathrooms. We unpack how eating disorders intersect with GI issues, why so many patients feel...
Jun 03, 2025•52 min
I worked a Saturday clinic. I know, shocking. Even more shocking: I saw something I’ve never actually encountered in real life until now—acute retinal necrosis. So in this episode, I walk you through what that looked like, how I figured it out, why it scared the hell out of me, and what happened next. Along the way, I also spiral into the difference between horses, zebras, and unicorns (yes, medically), why having shingles might come back to haunt your eyeballs, and what it’s like to be the doct...
May 29, 2025•45 min
In this episode, we’re unpacking the appointment of Dr. Casey Means as the new U.S. Surgeon General and everything that’s wrong with politicizing public health. Kristin and I get into functional medicine red flags, why “root cause” messaging can actually be dangerous, and the bizarre rise of raw milk influencers. (Spoiler: bovine tuberculosis is real, and no, we don’t want it.) We also talk about how Mother's Day made us reflect on post-trauma rituals, parenting energy levels, and... potted plan...
May 27, 2025•53 min
I was going to talk about corneas. Just a nice, focused anatomy deep dive. But then I found out UnitedHealthcare’s stock is down 20% and—what can I say? I got distracted by joy. So before we dig into layers of corneal meat (yes, I said that), we take a little detour into vertical integration, kickbacks, AI claim denials, and how a multi-billion-dollar behemoth is finally catching a whiff of accountability. Then it’s back to business: corneal nerves, LASIK, ulcers, transplant techniques, the grea...
May 22, 2025•43 min
If you’ve ever rolled your eyes at the word “wellness,” same. But this week, we sat down with Dr. Jillian Horton—physician, author, speaker, and actual expert on burnout and fulfillment—to talk about what wellness actually means… and why most organizations keep getting it very, very wrong. We talk about the burnout industrial complex, how “pizza-based wellness” is hurting morale more than helping, and why fulfillment might be a better goal than happiness. Jillian also shares why young doctors ar...
May 20, 2025•1 hr 10 min
Five years ago this month, I died. I mean, not for long—but long enough. In this episode, I talk about it. The cardiac arrest. The four-year curse. The memory gaps. The part where Kristen saved my life on a mattress, then got told I was “end of life” and left in a hospital hallway with no cell service. I don’t usually get into this on the podcast, but it’s time. I also talk about what it’s like to return to clinic too soon, what empathy fatigue feels like when it hits you mid-exam, and why Austr...
May 15, 2025•43 min
Five years ago, my heart stopped. And this week’s episode is about what it’s been like to live with that anniversary hanging in the air. Kristin and I talk through how the week felt, what’s changed in the five year, and what hasn’t. We talk about the weird guilt of surviving, the unexpected joy of ordinary days, and how “the trauma anniversary” messes with your brain in ways even a cardiologist can’t predict. No characters this week. No insurance rants. Just two people who went through something...
May 13, 2025•58 min
I started this week by crying with the internet and ended it by confiscating eye drops from unsuspecting patients, which is honestly peak ophthalmologist behavior. In this episode, I walk through a mystery case that showed up in my clinic (spoiler: droopy eyelids are rarely simple), explain why “clear eyes” doesn’t actually mean clear eyes, and rant about fake homeopathic drops pretending to treat pink eye. I also reflect on what it’s like to head to Australia and tell a room full of surgeons wh...
May 08, 2025•47 min
This episode started with a haircut and somehow ended with me reenacting testicular anatomy, suggesting Jonathan join OnlyFans, and possibly getting sued by a health insurance company. So... par for the course. Kristin and I cover everything from haircut inflation and pink taxes to our high school pranks involving fake blindness (yes, I know). We also dive into a wild, and honestly kind of satisfying, $421 million verdict against Blue Cross for approving breast cancer surgeries and then refusing...
May 06, 2025•49 min
Ever had to wait 45 minutes in the lobby just to wait another 30 in the exam room while imagining your doctor is in the back watching YouTube? In this episode, I break down what’s really going on behind the scenes of a chaotic clinic day—and no, it’s not lunch. Plus, a very satisfying rant about healthcare corporatization, a strangely relaxing moment involving blood in the eye (someone else’s, not mine), and an update on Arkansas doing something good (I know, I’m surprised too). I also ask an im...
May 01, 2025•47 min
Okay, so I made one comment about Kristin’s coffee-making skills and instantly became the villain. And then she replaced me—with Family Medicine. Like, actually replaced me. For an entire segment. This episode, we talk about the real heartbreak behind Medicare's decision not to cover GLP-1 medications for weight loss and diabetes, and the wider implications for access, affordability, and the ongoing “just exercise more” narrative that’s exhausting all of us. Spoiler: we’re not fans of weaponized...
Apr 29, 2025•36 min
I don’t cry often. Not because I’m especially tough—more because medicine does a pretty good job training that out of you. But sometimes? It happens. In this episode, I walk through four times I cried as a doctor (yes, one of them involves Rugrats), what led up to those moments, and what came after. There’s also a side quest into diagnosing The Sandlot’s Mr. Myrtle, a few shoutouts to comment-section philosophers, and some thoughts on whether it’s even worth debating people who think vaccines co...
Apr 24, 2025•46 min
So this episode started with a Reddit post about a guy who thinks his poop smells like his patients’ poop... and I wish I could say it gets less weird from there, but no—it really doesn’t. Kristin and I spiral into the science (and total lack of science) behind smell memory, hospital food, and whether we’re all just walking around slowly absorbing our work environments. Spoiler: if you're in ophthalmology, congrats—you’re mostly scent-neutral. Unless you've ever used a slit lamp on someone mid-G...
Apr 22, 2025•47 min
What do 19th-century vampires, corneal scarring, and rampant chlamydia have in common? Possibly more than you'd think. I Nosferatu and spiraled (in a good way) into diagnosing one of film’s creepiest figures using real ophthalmology. Along the way, I breaks down the leading causes of corneal blindness, unpack the wild world of corneal transplants, and imagine what kind of eye care Nosferartu might’ve needed in his castle. Takeaways: He May Be Immortal, But His Corneas Are Not: Nosferatu’s cloudy...
Apr 17, 2025•40 min
In this episode we welcome back Dr. Kaveh Hoda—gastroenterologist, musician, podcaster, and accidental poop ambassador. We discuss what life is really like as a GI doc (spoiler: it’s not all about poop), how Match Day can go terribly wrong—or surprisingly right—and why some residents get influenced by... ultimate frisbee. Kaveh also opens up about his path into medicine, his Persian music background, and his worst interview story (hint: it involves casual racism and a dental drill). But it would...
Apr 15, 2025•1 hr 10 min
In this episode, I dive into a mix of strange eye conditions, pop culture moments, and one very public showdown between a doctor and a group of anti-vaxxers on Jubilee’s Surrounded. But beyond the headlines, there’s a deeper conversation here—about what it costs to stay online, stay visible, and speak up. You’ll laugh, you’ll cringe, and you might even check your eyelids before bed. Takeaways: A Surprisingly Common Condition You’ve Probably Never Heard Of: It flips, it flops, and it might be the...
Apr 10, 2025•51 min
In this episode we ask a deceptively simple question: Would you let your kid become a doctor? What starts as a heartfelt reflection on medicine, sacrifice, and identity quickly unravels into a chaos-filled ride through policy disasters, parenting hypotheticals, and bone-based controversy. We touch on the NIH budget freeze and massive proposed Medicaid cuts—and why they’re not just headlines, but real threats to research, residency programs, and patients. Will also pitches a darkly hilarious “pri...
Apr 08, 2025•49 min
In this episode I share one of the more difficult days in the OR—when a routine cataract surgery didn’t go according to plan. I walk through the moment everything shifted, how I kept my cool, and what came after—both technically and emotionally. If you’ve ever wondered what it feels like to be a surgeon in that moment, this episode is a rare, honest window into it. Takeaways: Sometimes, Even “Routine” Surgeries Aren’t: Dr. Flanary opens up about a recent case that didn’t go as expected—and why e...
Apr 03, 2025•49 min
In this episode we are joined by a long-awaited guest—the one, the only, Emergency Medicine Doctor. Known for his mile-a-minute energy, caffeine addiction, and refusal to slow down, he makes his first-ever in-person podcast appearance… and it’s just as chaotic as you’d expect. Takeaways: He’s caffeinated. He’s chaotic. And now he’s got a microphone. What happens when a fictional ER doctor enters a real podcast studio? We tested ChatGPT’s joke-writing abilities… and the results were cringe. Batma...
Apr 01, 2025•44 min
In this episode I dive deep into the chaotic world of Match Day, exploring the emotional rollercoaster for medical students who match—and those who don’t. I share insights into why family medicine and pediatrics residency spots are going unfilled at alarming rates and what this means for the future of primary care. I also review the medical drama The Pitt, breaking down one of its most realistic emergency eye trauma scenes—complete with a lateral canthotomy and high-pressure eye injuries. Takeaw...
Mar 27, 2025•41 min
In this episode we invite Dr. Ryan Marino, a triple-board-certified toxicologist, addiction specialist, and emergency physician known for his relentless battle against medical misinformation—particularly myths about fentanyl and drug policy onto the podcast to share his shocking experience of being targeted by Tucker Carlson, which led to online harassment, real-life threats, and even attempts to get him fired. Takeaways: The fentanyl “touch overdose” myth is still widely believed, despite overw...
Mar 25, 2025•1 hr 9 min
In this episode I go on a private equity rant, breaking down how corporate takeovers are ruining healthcare—just like they’ve wrecked other industries, including Southwest Airlines. I explain how profit-driven ownership models are prioritizing revenue over patient care, forcing doctors into impossible situations and leading to worse outcomes for everyone. Takeaways: Private Equity is a Disaster for Healthcare: Dr. Flanary explains how private equity firms take over medical practices, cut costs, ...
Mar 20, 2025•47 min
