John Carpenter's The Fog

Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, we've got time for one more story. That's right. We're talking about The Fog. and salutations internet. It's your old pal Patrick Hamilton coming to you once again from beautiful Antonio Bay. This is the Kill by Kill podcast where we're dedicated to celebrating the least discussed component of any horror film.

the characters. We're going to unpack the gorious details of 1980's The Fog in the hopes that an Antonio Bay resident's untimely end is just the beginning of the jokes we might make at their expense. And as always, there's only one person I trust to always say yes, ma'am, like she's secretly saying fuck you. The one, the only, Gina Radcliffe. How are you doing today, Gina? Hang on.

I got to answer this door in the middle of this weird, that's knocking in the middle of this weird fog bank, even though I'm not expecting it. Oh, sorry. You got to do this without me. Here's the thing, Gina. How...

many panes of glass need to break near you before you start to take some shit seriously. I would say one, anything can happen. Two, That seems like a lot. Every pane of glass in my truck. Now I think something is seriously up. And then the clock in my own fucking house. It's time to start investigating. Yeah. I realize that Mrs. Coberts came from a different era, but I think when you were getting panicked messages from the mother of the child that you're babysitting...

That, you know, you don't go out there. There's something wrong. And there's an inexplicable fog bank coming. And someone knocks on the door and you ain't expecting company. Don't answer the fucking door. No. You could be rude. It's okay. Grab a bat. Grab an oar. Grab your wife. Grab your kids. Just back up and hide in the bathroom. It'll be okay. Yeah. I mean.

Like they understand. That is another thing that I have a serious question about. And I want you to think about this before we move on to anything else. And that is the ghosts in this are specifically. Ghost lepers? Leopard ghosts? They are often mistakenly referred to as pirate ghosts. They are not pirates. They are not pirates. There seems to be a bit of pirate lore in the town. but they are not specifically pirates in any way, shape, or form. That said, they died in 1880.

And then a hundred years later, they come back as ghosts. They have one hour to fuck shit up between midnight and 1am. I'm not sure specifically why they are given that hour, but it does seem to be part of the local lore. That said, why do they understand what a fucking gas station is, Gina? Why do they understand what gas pumps do? Are they just flipping switches? Yeah, I mean...

I think it's just like, you know, what's this do? What's this do? This looks interesting. What's this do? Do you need this? It's a nice town you have here. It'd be a shame if I stole my gold back.

So, when was the first time you watched The Fog? Oh, I... I'm sure I had to have been a kid. I probably caught this on cable. Sure. And have since watched it many, many times since then. I do revisit this one quite often. It's a nice... vibe movie. It's very, it just lulls you into a space. It's very easy on the eyes. I enjoy a lot of the performances. I would never rank it.

On the tippy top of John Carpenter's oeuvre. But it is underrated, though. I think people put it in a box, the same sort of box that they had put Halloween 3 into for a really long time. Where they're like, this is a disappointment. And to be honest with you, I think almost anything that would have come after Halloween. would have been a disappointment for horror films. Oh, of course, of course. It's got a different vibe. You know, I've been thinking about something you said.

I believe while we were recording the last episode of Chat by Chat, which would have been our May episode. You said that Becky always falls asleep in the middle of watching this. She's never been able to finish watching it. I wouldn't even say in the middle.

I would say a good 30 minutes in, she's in Snoresville. It's because it's cozy horror. It's very cozy horror. It starts with a guy on a beach telling a story to children. The E.F. Hutton guy? Yes, John Haslam. For the olds in the audience? Or the paper chase guy? No, the paper chase guy was Robert Ginty. Yeah, well, he became the paper chase guy because of Mystery Science Theater 3000.

dubbed him. But he was in the paper chase. He was in the paper chase. That is to be clear. And yeah, Hausman was known for other things. Which also means Gina. I'm just realizing this as we're speaking. We're going to have to cover Ghost Story. I mean, probably, yeah. I just...

I just put two and two together. We're going to be spending a lot of time talking about a certain scene involving one Mr. Craig Wasson. Yeah. The scene that I was put on notice on Facebook, I can never... post again otherwise i'm gone you're gonna get you're gonna get zucked i'm gonna get zucked real bad and it's covered up that's the thing like you can't see anything but

For whatever reason, you know, a certain scene. So my dream of posting that scene, like cut to the tune of Zyackety Sax will never come true. TikTok will have you. That's the thing. TikTok will have you. So, yes. Back to the fog. Out of the ghost story. But ghost story and this kind of have a lot in common.

Because there's cozy vibes, right? And I think... You've got this, you've got the changeling. Like, there was this, like, whole stretch. Like, well, this isn't... terrifying but it's very spooky and vibey and chilly and i you know the the slasher revolution had yet to happen when this film or ghost story or the changeling are in production. Because as big a deal as Halloween was, and it absolutely was, it was a slow builder.

It took a while for it to catch on. Its initial releases, because it was platformed, here and there's Roadshow on top of it. And it got lackluster reviews to start. And then... As John Carpenter puts it in the special features for The Fog, the Village Voice did a re-review of it. And they're like, oh my God, this is actually great. You have to go see it. And it starts to build after that. It really starts to hit a crisis point where people are asking for prints.

all over the country. And this movie that was made for $325,000 with next to no marketing budget. earns nearly $70 million at the box office alone. That's before it does anything else. That is huge. Hold on, Patrick. I got to let the cat out. Hold on one second. Now, when you say you have to let the cat out, do you mean out of the bag and you have a giant revelation? No, I bet my cat was literally scratching at the door like, please.

Let me go. Why have you trapped me here? Normally, he's absolutely fine just laying here while I'm recording, but not tonight. He's too spooked. He's too spooked already. That's right. Cats do not like this movie. That being said, I think because Halloween was so gigantic, the question then becomes how do you follow up? Not only that big of a hit, but something that actually shapes an entire sub-genre of film. You know, people just don't give Halloween enough props for being...

the independent film that shook the pillars of power. It took until Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and then the Blair Witch Project for independent films to earn more. than Halloween. It was just that gigantic. And so Carpenter releases the movie. Deborah Hill gets feedback from the distributor that it's, it's not firing people.

People aren't going for it. He goes on vacation. He comes back. And all of a sudden, he has calls from all over town saying, we want to make a deal with you. And he's like, I. Well, I mean, I'm going to say yes, but I'm not entirely sure why. And it's because over the course of time of him, I believe, filming Elvis, the... The movie just goes through the roof. And so to think that Carpenter and Deborah Hill took one producer's idea of babysitter murders.

And crafted into a thriller that makes safe suburban homes feel dangerous. Like abandoned outposts surrounded by humanity. Halloween is simple. It's revolutionary. And anything you follow it up with. is going to, I feel like, feel like somewhat of a letdown. Yeah, if you don't, as we see over and over again, with horror in particular, if you don't make the exact same thing note for note, people are going to be disappointed.

I mean, I think Astor confronted this to a degree, not to the same degree, but to a degree with Midsommar after Hereditary. Jordan Peele felt this in the aftermath of Get Out, which was so... Culturally gigantic. And then, in my opinion, Us is the better film and the one I think about the most. And it does, both of those movies do well, but they're not.

as gigantic a culture shift, a vibe shift, as their initial films. I mean, you can name a director. They probably confronted this at some point in their career, if they have a long enough one.

And so for years, the general perception of the fog is, all right, it's okay at best. But it was made for just a million bucks. And it made over 20. So that's a 20 times multiplier. But it is a large fall off from Halloween's rampaging financial success. This is still an insane return on investment. But like many of Carpenter's 80s output. The box office is hardly the story. If anything, what is ultimately the story is that his stuff doesn't get the respect it's due.

Because they really become big cultural standpoints when they hit the VHS DVD era and they're watched ad nauseum.

Right. Right. And I think that this, you know, what this has going for it that maybe doesn't get the appreciation it deserves is, you know, my old favorite building tension, which, you know, you other people interpret as. boring yeah sure because nothing happens immediately whereas whereas with halloween you've got that that barn burner opening sequence yeah uh here you just got an old man telling a ghost story and

And some spooky shit. Right. And then the first kill, maybe 25 minutes into the movie, it's a while. It takes a little while. It takes a little while to get there. There is some... There's some table setting that needs to happen. Yeah, you've got a lot more characters, you know, involved in this. But like, so, you know, it is trying to be a little bit of a character piece, which, you know, Halloween was not. Yeah.

I think one of the things that is most underrated about this movie is its score. Yes. The score is very spooky. And I think this was... I think this was one that Carpenter did himself as opposed to The Thing, which was Ennio Morricone. But even there, Morricone is doing a John Carpenter. Right, but they have a lot of, there's some similarities.

but i think one of the best uh pieces from this score is uh it's a it's a long track i forget the actual name of it but it literally sounds like this will be hammering on a door and it is so jarring and so unsettling and so effective and it's just like this doesn't get the appreciation it deserves yeah and It's just not, there's a lot of talk about like, well, this isn't what people expected. And a lot of that tends to come from John Carpenter.

But it's also his reaction not to what the marketplace is doing. Because when this comes out, like Friday the 13th doesn't come out until June. So it's not like... slashers have been cemented as the genre du jour. There's only really Halloween and to degrees Texas Chainsaw and Black Christmas that come before. So it's not like people are like, this is just what I want.

you know friday 13th sort of solidifies that but what i think it has in common with halloween as you mentioned is like there is a definite mood to this this movie just expands on that broken foundation of American society that he sees post-Nixon. How greed and murder... of the past are walled off from modern life for everyone's emotional comfort. Not that that ever happens now, Gina.

Not at all. Not at all. We almost never celebrate the creation of something that was built on top of destroying something or someone or several someones else. Yes. And how dare you bring it up? Because that's just rude and you make me feel bad. And that kind of denial eventually drags us back into murky, blood-filled waters of our collective origin story that people...

do not like repeated. And that being said, I think the stuff that The Fog combines really well is that sort of campfire folk tale, Lovecraftian dread, and... the works of a modern literary figure that I doubt that Carpenter or Hill considered for one second when writing the script. And wouldn't you know it?

He happens to be the focus of this year on Kill by Kill, or season rather, and that is... stephen king because baby this is so king coded it's wild that he had nothing to do with it yeah oh yeah it totally is i mean this is the whole town's got a very stephen king feel to it yeah you know what the The quirky townsfolk and the setting that, well, nobody specifically says they're isolated. Like, they're isolated. It's going to take a while to get from anywhere.

People like being in this small town because it's a small town, because it is separated from the big city. They have been drawn here. People have been living here for generations and it works. That is the sort of setup for what King does so well. And we've mentioned it before. This town is going to hell tale. And up until this point, Salem's live. is the only one he's really put into motion technically the stand that's a whole world going to hell sitch so

So it's permutated, but I don't think anyone has said to themselves, oh, this is like a whole thing happening right now. But as we mentioned, because of Salem Slot being on television and there's this film. and Ghost Story and The Changeling, although that's in Denver, but it's still the vibe. This is what is the prevailing, we need to make ghost stories, baby. Right.

And when you watch Hooper's 79 TV version of The Lot, as we did, but cast your mind back, you can feel the vibes that Carpenter is able to make a lot more cinematic. with his non-CBS television version. You know, he just has more real estate to drag out suspense sequences and allow for silences and atmosphere. And that is no shade at all to Hooper. But... Toby had to deal with commercials and interruptions and TV pacing. And I would also say.

As much as I dig the fog, I don't think there's a single sequence in it that equals that click kid coming to the bedroom window. Yeah, I would. agree with that for the most part. I think there's a lot of good suspense to this, though. I love The Fog. I love 79 Salem's Lot. It's not really competition. It's just interesting that they're playing off. It's almost like they're playing the same game with different cards. And so to that degree.

It's interesting to use them as examples to bounce off of one another. But again, it's not a fucking competition. It's just interesting that this is all in the miasma all at the same time. Yeah, I will agree with you that when I was a kid I never particularly worried about leper ghosts being outside my bedroom window. I worried a lot about little vampire boys floating outside my bedroom window.

It is a more core because the ghosts here operate on very specific rules in that. They go wherever the fog goes. If you're in the fog, you're in danger. If you're out of the fog, you're absolutely fine until you're not. It weirdly plays fast and loose with its own rules. Well, I mean, I think that the idea... Are you talking about the ending kill? How they're able to... But it's throughout. Like, you don't... The fog can happen.

and and stuff happens but also shit happens when there's zero fog like inside that store there ain't no fog inside that store they're still shaking the shit out of it yeah they they do towers seem to kind of change from scene to scene. That is true. There seems to be, you know...

Some suggested that they don't actually say they don't actually need to be present to haunt something. Right. But they do need to be present to murder the shit out of you. That's true. They can spookify you from afar, but if they really want to... get up in your biz. They want the old stab a stab. You have to be in the fog. I think what Antonio Bay and Haddonfield share. is that he's able to make these, the small town and single family homes seem dangerous.

This is a place that has not seen a ton of crime. We meet the sheriff once because... Why would we need to talk to him? It's even less police interference than Halloween is. This is such a safe town that when...

Tom Atkins picks up hitchhiker Jamie Lee Curtis. The very next scene, they're in bed together. Every time, I've seen this movie probably a good 20 times at this point. And the smash cut to them being in bed is evidently about an hour. first met it's less it's because he picks her up at sometime just after midnight and this is

before one o'clock in the morning. That's true because the ghost knocks on his door. That's right. So he picks her up and they go right to his place. They waste zero fucking time. There's no romance to this thing. go. She don't need to get there that fast. I have to assume.

that smashing truck windows is some sort of lubricating agent. It's like, okay, well, I wasn't going to fuck you, but I'm going to now. I got to take off these clothes because of glass shards. We might as well fuck, even though you don't have a mustache. And that is the one thing about Tom Atkins. I think his face just looks better with a mustache.

which is the movie that uh in the um in search of darkness uh document was it this one where he like you could see his butt and he was like he was like i had an ass back then i don't have an ass anymore If he had an ass in this movie, it did not pull focus. It might have been... It might have been Halloween 3 he was talking about. But yeah, he was gleeful about the fact that he had a bare butt scene in one of these movies. Tom Atkins, legendary cinema.

He's like 150 years old now just talking about how happy he was to show his butt on screen. But a legendary cinematic stick man, mustache wearer, and had multiple characters. constantly drinking beers while driving. Oh my God. Yeah. This is a very, you know, nobody gives a shit. We're all good here. This is like, this is like one of those towns, like when like a horrible crime happens, the, the, the newscaster says they left their doors unlocked.

They never thought it could happen here. Well, I mean, that is the fucking thing here, Gina, because we've often railed against these story situations where these, you know, this transgressive. crime slowly becomes the thing of legend and then the character's like i kind of heard about this which is that trope is so fucking stupid because even non-shocking crimes are re-prosecuted

into the ground now. So I'm not entirely sure why the cardinal sin of Antonio Bay isn't more of a thing, but they've sanitized it to the point where a guy on a beach is like, Hey, man, I got six minutes. Time to tell the story about how we grounded this fucking ship. And all these people died. And then, lo and behold, we became a town based on the gold we all had. Let me tell you a fun story about how the town was created, children.

I mean, honestly speaking, it was either going to be that or killing some indigenous people. Sure. And that probably happened too. Carpenter is sort of filtering it through this other lens. And that's kind of his vibe, though. What he does over and over again is just, like, expose the rot.

just underneath the floorboards of the foundation of this country and then people will go oh poor horror doesn't have to be political it's like bro I know you're not seeing it. It doesn't mean it's not there. Yeah, I mean, I will happily dip from this, you know, get up on this hill over and over again, that if you think that horror being political... is a recent development yeah your comprehension studies our skills are no and i'm i'm fine with people for the most part watching things

as they're presented, right? I don't need to dig into every level during my first time watch. But I also don't know why they would get all up in arms about us talking about... what is plainly laid out in the motion picture we watched. Right, exactly. It's like when you... read about a famous song and it'll have like, you know, interpretation. It'll be like, you know, generally what this song is believed to be about. And then the, you know, the actual writer sounds like, well, no, actually.

meant it to be about this and people are like no it's actually about this I made up my mind. One of my favorite songs of all time is Perfect Day, the Lou Reed song, and which many people have interpreted. meaning it's about heroin addiction, when it is pretty... obviously a love song. I mean, it's a breakup song, ultimately. But, you know, nope, it's about his addiction to heroin and, you know, how he just can't quit it. And Lou Reed's like, no, I wrote the song.

It's about my marriage falling apart. What would he know, honestly? It's like, yeah, but have you considered? I mean, if you want Lou Reed songs about heroin. Swing a dead cat. You'll hit one. You can try the song Heroin for one. I mean, you know, the joke is heroin's actually about his mother. I kid, it's actually about heroin. And so because I think Carpenter gives Antonio Bay the same isolating treatment as he did with Haddonfield since they're both.

house deadly secrets that no one wants to confront. That Antonio Bay and Hanfield are the safe places until their sins come back to revisit them, either by Michael Myers, Or leper ghosts. And to me, this movie houses a lot of interesting conversation. It's a great mood. And I think some of the character work is really fucking fun. Yeah, it is. These feel like lived-in characters. Yeah. You know, I'm not saying that...

Tom Atkins and Jamie Lee Curtis don't have chemistry. They do. Yes. But certainly from a modern perspective. the speed they go from his picking her up And it's not even like picking her up in a bar, like, like, you know, picking some up with the intent that you're going to go home and have sex. You know, she's hitchhiking.

Yeah. And, you know, they banter for about 11 seconds. And then, you know, his windows get smashed out by leper ghosts. And she's like, all right, well, let's get in the bed. This is just the thing I needed.

And I think because it's riffing on a bunch of different things, one thing that Carpenter mentions in interviews about the movie is that... Once he had discovered that Halloween was a success, that people were sort of pitching him as what he referred to as, quote, a tin pan Hitchcock, that he almost wanted to play into that. The Fog is riffing on a ton of things, but one of the inspirations is The Birds, in that it's a movie that's, you know, it's intimated in The Birds that...

Everything happens because Tippi Hedren slides into town to fuck Rod Taylor. And the rest of the sleepy seaside town alternates between yelling witch and whore. at her when they're not getting their eyes pecked out. And Jamie Lee Curtis sort of breezes into town, sleeps with the dude, and shit goes sideways. I mean... It's not a direct reference. It's sort of a playing off inspiration sort of thing. There's not a big difference between Bodega Bay and Antonio Bay.

Well, no, that's true. I'll give you that. Yeah, I guess I can see where certainly... You know, the inspiration was picked up there. Yeah. But I mean, I don't know that anybody specifically thinks, oh, you know, we were fine until you showed up. No, she's the one who says it. She's the one who said, none of this happened until I got here. Things always happen when I'm around. Which makes me wonder, what the fuck did she, how did she leave Pasadena?

What kind of condition is Pasadena in? Yeah, I want to see her backstory. Like, what kind of path of destruction did she inadvertently leave behind her? Well, you know, there was those... Babysitter murders in Illinois some years. Right. Which were actually in South Pasadena. So, in a way, it's more of a reference to her coming from Pasadena where Halloween was filmed.

than anything else but we're getting too meta for our own paint alone a's i think yeah but don't we always yes so this movie begins uh with

John Hausman by Campfire. The most British man who ever lived. Wait, is he British or is he from, like, the mid-Atlantic? I can never tell. No, he's British. He was British. He was, like, 112 here. Right. Put this old man on a beach to tell stories. Would someone please guide me down to the beach because I'm a little rickety on boat shoes. May I have a blanket? Perhaps a cup of tea. I'm very, very cold. I keep reaching for this pocket watch and I can't.

Fucking see it. What is this split diopter bullshit? Who do you think you are, Alfred? Hitchcock. You know, I was a friend of his grandfather's. We used to chase birds before he wrote... The script to The Birds. My question to you is, all these children are in front of him at this campfire. What is this? Did the town organize this? Does he do this on Friday nights? Like, why is this happening? Yeah, I guess.

I guess it is just sort of like a, you know, well, it's, you know, it's nighttime campfire tales with, you know, old, you, Grandpa Witherspoon here. I know he actually had Mr. Mocking or something like that. Mr. Mocking, yes. He does have a name. someone else great well nobody ever actually says it so it doesn't matter he's learned this is all like he like told this story and then like fucked off to like you know the the the you know the the the antonio bay home for the elderly we we presume

that he's fine. He's fine. He survived this. The only fog I ever see is the bathroom after I have a lot of leafy greens. My question to you, though, Gina, is... Is he actually just telling campfire stories, or... Is this him scaring these children straight? Are they all local ruffians that he's trying to put back on the right track? No.

I think it's just, you know, the local children are here. Let's tell scary stories. I mean, he did say I have time for one more story. But what if all the stories before this were like, in C-Block, they called me. Big Daddy. Are you saying the children aren't supposed to be hanging out with Mr. Malkin? I'm telling you, they've been brought to Mr. Malkin to be scared straight.

The local law enforcement has tagged them as troublemakers, and his goal here is to get them back on the straight and narrow by saying that if he ever met them in prison, I would own. That booty. He's telling him, you know, about horror stories, about being in the trenches in World War I. I was already 57. You have to understand, it was very hard on me. You never know what life is like until you take the life of a German who's crossed into no man's land.

And I strangled that Jerry until he turned purple. I don't know if it was the bloodlust or the gases. What other World War II? This is basically Count Orlok with less asthma. Yeah, no, no. It's more of a whisper. Then Count Orlok. There's less wheezing. It's taken everything to just do Hausman. Hausman's a sub Orlok. Let's put it that way.

And then rat is just a lot of Brooklyn accent. Yes. I realized a couple days ago what other characters we've done. I believe rat. Just generic rat is one of the voices I have. Angelo rat. And so it doesn't much matter what we think of John Hasman because we never fucking see him again. He may be the death in this movie, but we never see him die. Yeah, he walks into the sea. We just get to see him again. Goodbye, children. Have you ever seen the little thing called Creep Show? So.

Then after this, we meet Father Malone, played with a delight with, I don't know. Is Hal Holbrook happy to be in this movie? He seems unhappy. I think he is... trying to give this role some dramatic gravitas. Yeah. I think that he is acting as though he has the weight of his ancestors on his shoulders. Yes. I think being in that church with all of his granddad's confessions and, and stolen blood covered gold cross is not doing him any favors, but also do.

Priests generally start having families so that the kids can get into the family business? Is that something that priests do? think so is he anglican is that i mean i mean he could be episcopalian sure i think episcopalians are allowed to have families i don't believe i don't think this is a catholic town

Based on everything we see, no, it is not very much a Catholic town. That is noted. That being said, I don't think Father Malone is a good boss. No. No, we know that thanks to John Carpenter's cameo appearance that you have to shake him down for your paycheck. I just love how whiny he's like, can I have my money now? Could I have the money I need to live and eat? And he's like, could you pay me for my work?

I can give you a glass of wine or let you come in two hours later tomorrow, but I cannot pay you. Which is your favorite, like, interaction with a young, nerdy dude, a priest, this or Exorcist 3? Because Exorcist 3, like, Father Dyer's about to say, hey, fuck off, kid. Jesus. Yes. No, I mean, he's got...

Dyer's got a lot more juice. That's for sure. Malone is a genuine sand sack. When he's not leaping at you from the shadows. Like doing that, like Nosferatu, like standing straight up from a prone position. He comes out like a vampire out of fucking nowhere. Like, who does that to somebody? To jail. Straight to jail. Father Malone, not innocent.

Although I think generally he's guilty of being a shitty boss for the most part. And just being a big old booze hound. So now I think we have to get to the discussion. I'm sure most people tuned into this episode to hear.

Because if you watch The Fog in the Past, you know that there's a certain element to it that is probably going to be a bounty to us in this particular podcast. And that is the fact that they built the city. They built this city on the loudest, worst jazz of all fucking time. I cannot tell you. This movie must have ruined my... Any appreciation I might have had for jazz for at least 15 years? Yeah, you...

You thought that the music that Annie and Laurie listened to in the car, the in-universe music at Halloween was bad? It's bad. You ain't never seen the programming format. I can't remember the call numbers, but Antonio Bay's one, parentheses, number one, one radio station. I believe it's K-A-B. K-A-B, right. That makes sense. K-Antonio Bay, which also things, they have to have three letters. It's K and then three letters on the West Coast.

Again, I'm not coming to fucking the fog for realism, but it's one of those things that drives me crazy as everything with KAB drives me crazy because they only play.

Either the loudest, most aggressive jazz music you've ever heard or the most off-putting. But it's always not good. It's like... dentist's office light jazz yeah or it is the kind of jazz meant to drive a dictator out of a spider hole there's just This is the thing you start blasting at a dictator in a Central American country to make them come out of a bunker.

Yeah, you've got Adrienne Barbeau. She's a foxy single mom. She's moving to this little town. She buys a lighthouse, which is really super cool. Yeah. And she runs the town radio station out of the lighthouse and plays one kind of music. The worst.

The worst kind of music. Listen, no one at their height, I don't care what the jazz musician is, no one at their height, there is no... great jazz rap album that is using any sample from any of the things that are covered here no this is this is like pharmacy hold music just When there's a scare sequence where a stone falls out of a wall and KAB comes on the radio and immediately it's like... Oh, Jesus Christ.

It's like, I don't know which jump scare got to me more. Yeah, like, it's made worse. The stone falling out of the wall, the shrieking trumpets. The fact that... Everyone's radio is turned to this station. Like it is literally the only radio station in town. Like that is how isolated they are. And they're forced to listen to this.

And how long is she on the radio? Why is she taking the 2 p.m. to 1 a.m. shift at her own radio station? And that apparently does not have anybody covering for her, any other shifts. This is like a... This is like a very full-time job for her. Yes, extremely full-time job for her, considering the fact that her child is just on their own for giant swaths of the day until...

Mrs. What's-her-face? Mrs. Cobritz. Mrs. Cobritz arrives to kind of watch her child just basically stroke his hair a lot. I mean, to her... defense, she does shoo him away when she's about to open the door to murder. Right. That's very true. You know, we don't like to beg on kids on this show.

That's not the energy we like to bring to things. That said, Andy is fucking cursed. Like how many of his friends ended up locked inside of abandoned fridges, Gina? Oh, I mean, a lot. He just seems like fucking trouble, but not sitcom trouble. Like, and that kid was never seen again trouble. Yeah, no, absolutely. Yeah, he's definitely putting a dry cleaning bag over his head. There has to be a reason why the ghosts pick him.

to import a haunted piece of wood into town. He's like, this cool piece of wood. Mom, I told you, it's a simple story. I saw gold doubloon. It turned into wood, and I gave it to you. That's when you go, I'm leaving that wood outside. She's like, I'm going to take this to the fucking, my work, your work. Why are you taking it to work? Let me see if I can upcycle this.

What are you going to examine? Do you have a CSI lab in that fucking place? I doubt it. No. As a promo person, I don't care for any of the promos that she is given by that company. No. Yeah, yeah, that's your business, right? I haven't done radio in a really long time. And radio was more like specific TV promo spots on radio. That being said.

They're sisters, right? They're not that far apart from one another. But they're just throwing spaghetti at the wall there. And it's hard to make suspense happen when some guy in the background is going, Fabulous KAB with a radio DJ yak. Yeah, there's nothing fabulous about KAB. There really is not. I just... Do not care for the format. I don't care for any record that she plays. She's got eight tracks. I don't like it. I don't care for it. I don't want it to continue.

No, no, she should sell that radio station. When we talk about how sleepy a town Antonio Bay is, my question to you is eventually revealed that this town has four... Payphones. Four? They have a payphone rush that requires not one, not dose, not trace, but quattro payphones. Four pay phones for a town that appears to have a 7 p.m. curfew. Unless there are multiple reporters jumping into those phone booths and they all fall over at the same time like an airplane.

This is, I doubt it. I fucking doubt it. This is when we get a long sequence of kind of ramping up the ghostly presence between midnight and 1 a.m. And this is when they're shaking the shit out of bottled water. and they're yanking out gas. Like, how do they even know what a fucking gas hose is? I'm telling you, they're just like, you know, just walking, just like touching them, you know, like, you know, when you bring a small child into a store, they have to put their...

hands on everything. It's like that. I mentioned that Tom Adkins needs a mustache to make it work. I like Tom Adkins. I like him in this. It's...

completely unexplained as to why any of this shit is his business though. Yeah. Yeah. I don't, I don't know. That's a good question. He just kind of like, he has sex with a girl from out of town, which. I would just luxuriate in that if I were him. Because how many times is that happening? And he's like, let's go down to the docks.

Let me harass this guy who's filling out paperwork. Let me get another buddy I know to get me to drive out and find this other abandoned craft in the middle of the ocean. For why? For what? Yeah, that's a good question. question he really does not have any reason to get involved with this mystery like i i think he basically says oh you know oh one of the one of the people on the boat out there is a friend of mine it's like well best of luck to you but like what's your job i mean

Does your job have anything to do with this? Or you're just concerned about the friend? That part feels a little bit like, you know, there's something was left on the editing room for like, like, like something that establishes, okay, what is his role here? That's the thing about this, Gina. Nothing was left on the editing room floor. When he was done filming this, it was fucking 80 tight minutes. Really? And they watched it, and they're like, oh, shit.

we have to put horror into this horror movie. So they spent an extra 200K like adding gore, adding suspense, like all the ghost sequences up front, that's created out of editing. Like those were parsed out throughout the rest of the movie. And they're like, no, no, no, no, no. Back it up, up into the front. All the murder sequences on that boat, that is all after the fact. There's so much of this movie that is horror related.

is done after they wrapped their initial shoot. Oh, wow. I mean, I think some of it is how Carpenter talks about it. Like, this is not my finest hour. This was something I had an idea and we go into it and we get a bunch of our friends and we make it for cheap. Not as cheap as Halloween, but pretty cheap. Then when we go back and watch it, we're like, fuck, this is not going to work. We've got to do something here. And they're like, please, quick, someone.

Rig up some hooks to stab into people because we got to make this thing. We need to have an on-screen murder. At least one. I mean, a lot of this originally was people disappearing into the fog. and like he goes away and comes back and he's got two people editing the movie it's like how's biz is this like the best thing since you know sliced bread and like uh This ain't working. This is bad. And so even the NAVCO embassy is like, yeah, we got to. Here's 200K. What can you make happen for 200K?

Yeah, we mentioned that Elizabeth is from Pasadena. She's an art student. We never really know exactly why she's needed in Vancouver. I kind of assume that's to go to art school, but that's just... Me guessing. Well, I mean, it's funny. The youth of today would be appalled, and they should be, honestly, at the concept of hitchhiking. Sure.

So it was not unusual and certainly was, you know, at this point almost a cliche in movies to have this kind of wayward young woman. And it's always a young woman. It makes it more lurid that way. who, you know, just, you know, blowing out of her two-bit town and taking off her parts unknown, you know, hitting the road. So I think it's kind of one of those things where she's, you know, she's finding herself. Sure. So, you know, she's going to go, Vancouver would be north.

of where they're currently located, correct? Yes, yes. Okay, so... Well, actually, it kind of depends. I mean, like, Antonio Bay doesn't really exist. This is sort of like... I mean, I got the impression it's in somewhere in Northern California. It is weird that she goes directly from this, playing a hitchhiker, to road games where she's also a hitchhiker, but she's all the way in Australia.

Well, maybe she kind of hitched her way there. Should we do road games? Does that count as an evil car movie? I mean, if we do that, we're going to have to do Duel and The Car and maybe the Killer Tire movie. We're already on the hook this year for Kill Dozers.

I don't know. And I mean, if we're going to do that, then we should probably do The Hitcher, which we've talked about for like 25 years now doing. And which is amazing because we've only been doing the show for nine years. Well, I think for a lot of those years, The Hitcher was real fucking hard to find.

was an issue with that. Well, that's true. That's true. But now it isn't, we should do it. That's true. Let's put it on the list. It's got to happen. And then, of course, like the fog, we can also cover the... wah, wah, remake of the history. Well, we talked about that. We have a plan. We do have a plan. We're relating a plan for another theme month because we know how much you love songs. Based on numbers, not at all. I don't know.

Not as much as we love them. We enjoy them. They take the weight off of us. It makes planning a lot easier. Yeah, but no, people like to be fucking surprised. Speaking of which. Andy goes to the beach and he's got a fishing rod and the whole nine yards. And then he comes back with just a piece of haunted wood. That's not a super successful fishing trip. No. And he's more excited about the fact that he has.

He has wood. Then he's found a gold doubloon. He's like, well, yeah, there was gold, but then it turned into wood. Right. It was gold, then it turned into wood. Useless wood, Mom. And she's like, I'm wearing a night cam. It's driftwood. Can you believe it? By the beach? You almost never. You own a life? house mom you truly you've never seen driftwood mom why are your socks all the way across the room it's like you were blown out of them that being said

What the fuck is a stomach pounder? You know what? I am going to guess it is a large cheeseburger. That would make sense, but it's kind of like... They don't ever explain it. I don't know. I think that Carpenter probably thought this seemed like something a kid would say. Sure, sure. Like, he doesn't, he... does not done a lot with child characters in movies. No. Except, I mean, if you want to count...

Tommy and Lindsay, fine. They are barely supporting characters. I can't say that his... It was the island... The remake that he did for Universal. Oh. where all them kids is blonde. Oh, Village of the Damned. Village of the Damned. I don't know why I keep putting... It is an island. That's the only thing that sticks out about it to me.

But yeah, Village of the Damed is full of things. And those don't count either because they all act like weird little adults. Yes. So I think he is one of those writers that you... tries to come up with and stephen king does this sometimes too god bless him comes up with like you know you his own slang that and you know and you see this online like uh like like uh you know

the weird slide of Stephen King comes up with for his child characters. I think he tried that same thing too. Yes. And not everyone can be like a Joss Whedon in that particular respect. They can actually make... At least it sounds like it suits the universe that it's in. That being said... Yeah, I would have been, really, we'll have to dig into this a little bit more. But I can't imagine what Carpenter's Firestarter would have been like. Yeah.

that's interesting because it's so much of it focuses on this child yes and and and you know and the weird way that adult men act towards her yeah it's gonna be an interesting I have not watched that in a really long time. And I have another do-nothing remake. That the only reason I wanted to see it was because Carpenter did the score for it. I barely, you know, I completely forgot that existed until you mentioned it just this very minute. Congratulations. I mean, I do remember, I do remember.

to a certain extent fire starter you know more or less being faithful to the novel in the same way that Christine was, in that, you know, yeah, a lot was left out, but at the same time, the salient points were still there. It was a recognizable...

Yeah. You know, every once in a while, you're watching a movie that you've seen a million times. And then a performance jumps out at you. As being your favorite. So. In this particular movie. Jamie Lee Curtis's mom. Janet Lee. shows up here as Kathy Williams, who's a local... She's not the mayor. No one refers to her as the mayor, but she does seem to be the person who gets shit done to the point which he has a fucking assistant.

I think she, if I had to guess, I would say she is probably like the head of the city council. Yes. Some sort of, you know, not quite as important as the mayor, but, you know, the mayor kind of, you know, foists off a lot of things. on her to do anything that has to do with community building. That being said, her assistant... is Sandy played by Nancy Loomis. And I have discovered something about myself. I have developed a small crush on Nancy Loomis over the course of this Halloween.

I think she is very attractive and super fucking funny in both this and Halloween. Yeah, she's got a very dry and sarcastic delivery in virtually everything she says. Yes. Especially in this. She seems like she is Mrs. Williams' assistant under duress. Yeah. She has committed a petty crime. And this is her community service. She was given two choices. Pick up trash off the highway into town or be Kathy's assistant. And she's like...

There's not enough trash. I guess I'll be the assistant. She's like, can't you just still give me the stick with the little pointy thing on it? She is so fucking funny in this movie. And she's just as funny in Halloween. I just, like, why don't I have, like, dozens of Nancy Loomis vehicles? Yeah, she is like 25 here, but she's just sort of like following behind Kathy, just like a surly 13-year-old, like just rolling her eyes.

Like, every time she asks her to do anything, it is very funny. When I clicked play on the Blu-ray, I did not expect to, I didn't say beforehand, I hope this doesn't awaken anything in me. And it did. And that is Nancy Loomis walking with papers and books in one hand, just being sarcastic as fuck.

I don't know why that is. I truly do not. I thought, well, I agree with you. I initially thought you said favorite performances. I thought you were going to say Janet Leigh because she has, you know, like... kind of given an element to her role that suggests, you know, what if Olive Oil was on city council? True. She's a bit of a busybody.

Yeah, she's very much fretting over this celebration of the founding of a town that appears to have about 65 people in it. For whatever reason, she hasn't looked at that statue until it's been cemented in place. And then she looks under a fucking piece of sheet and like, okay, could be worse. Like you should have, you really should have looked at this before it was cemented in place.

Yeah, what if it ended up looking like that Lucille Ball statue? Oh, God. Wow. And that is the thing. Art is hard, everybody. And... Every once in a while, people would come up real fucking short. If you don't know what I'm talking about, Google Lucille Ball statue. You will be shocked. Much like the face of that statue.

It strains credulity to me that Kathy is married to a fisherman because she seems like she's got a bigger than fish kind of lifestyle. Yeah, she's not tolerating those wet galoshes right inside her front door and the smell and the scales and everything. No, I don't believe it. Because when...

Everyone's like, you should really, you know, don't worry about this. Go home. They're going to find him. It's going to be okay. She's like, nope, nope, sticking this out. And you kind of like, in the back of her mind, she's kind of hoping, if he's gone. The insurance money pays off. So if he didn't disappear, she would have killed him eventually anyway. I wanted a new gigantic station wagon that's longer than a hearse. And the only way I'm going to get it is if he's dead.

Hal Holbrook, then Kathy and the cinematic, the new cinematic love of my life, Nancy Lewis. They go and they talk to Hal Holbrook. And he's one of those actors, and I have heard this specifically about Hal Holbrook, where people used to say, I could listen to him read the phone book. And my question to them would have been, have you heard him read his grandfather's diary? You might choose differently.

I mean, I think they're thinking of like, you know, you know, the Hal Holbrook who did a Mark Twain one man show. Yes. That he was just magnetic as Twain. And I can absolutely believe that. Here it seems like he just would like to break for lunch. That being said. At the end of it, Kathy's like, hey, so dedication ceremony, you want to hit us up with one of those famous...

father asshole prayers that we all love and enjoy. It's like, this place is built on blood and it's a fraud. It's just like, I'll let you sit on it. Rules this town with a velvet glove. Welcome to the revolution, comrade. Comrade Malone. Usually... You're up on the sauce, and now you're dead sober, and it turns out you are worse. Start drinking again. Before you were a bore with two O's, now you're a bore with an R-E. Her exact quote to him is, I think you're taking...

this all a little too seriously. The murder? He's taking the murder too seriously? He's taking stealing from lepers too seriously. You know, I mean, every town has its history. Yeah. She absolutely would not approve of destroying Confederate statues. We, and if you're wondering, like.

When do the scares happen? When do the kills happen? Sporadically. It takes a while to get to the first three deaths, and they all happen in a row. And I think... What kind of makes them not as great is that they're all kind of the same. They're all stabs, just they've chosen different body parts.

Yeah, I mean, certainly the most gruesome one is someone gets it in the eyes and there's some nice squishy noises that go with that. So it's pretty obvious. You don't see it going in the eye, but it's... It's pretty clear what has happened. But yeah, you know, you have some hooks, some little stabby things. You get to see Buckflower completely Buckflower.

And they get stabbed a whole bunch. There is that one really cool shot where they're looking off the side of their boat and out of fucking nowhere, there's a giant clipper ship passed by them and then it's gone. And you're like... That is fucking freaky. I would be scared by this. This is not something I want to be a part of. They're instantly like, let's beat feet.

I think if the ghosts don't get them immediately, they probably would have run on top of the water, Warner Brothers cartoon style, all the way into shore. Yeah. But, so... It turns out that Elizabeth and Nick, they go out there to try to find the ship. They find it within half an hour. It's what that third wheel guy's afternoon was like. Must have been fun to see those two constantly canoodling. And you're like, I'm looking for like dead bodies here. Yeah.

It's like, can you do that somewhere else? Just take this elsewhere, right? We're looking for people. This is not the time. We hope we find them alive. This is either a rescue mission or picking up dead bodies.

And so they go to the ship. It turns out it's either wet or too cold. It doesn't make any sense. We hear a couple Nick stories. Elizabeth's like. crazy shit happens when I'm around a locker opens up for a fake scare. And then, uh, like 30 seconds later, a body jumps out from behind her because I guess the pirates put. A spring behind its back? I'm not sure. Well, there are a couple things that, like, also...

Like, I don't know. There's that one scene in, like, the medical examiner's office where one of the corpses actually gets up. and starts walking and it's like okay are we gonna do something no we're not gonna do anything with that again it's more like i it's a warning but i think the ghosts like the way it's intimated when he when father malone reads the diary it's intimated that

They're going to kill off any remnants, any remaining family members of the original six conspirators. And they have to collect six bodies. And that's the deal they made with... Davy Jones or whoever the fuck that they got the ability to come back a hundred years later. But I don't, like maybe one of those guys is semi-related too. a founding father. They're just three bodies. And when that one, it just gets up for a walk. And then she turns around and gives Jaina.

What is up with Jamie Lee Curtis' scream? It's not good. It's shrill. It is identifiable. Yeah, it's, it's not quite as, she's not quite as going for, for dogs has exploding as she is in, uh, in a, um, night. That's, but, but it's, it's shrill. It is just, it is scanners, but audible. For whatever reason, it makes my head explode. I love Jamie Lynn Curtis. I love her in this, but I...

The whole idea of her being known for her scream is like, yes, but is it a positive thing? Because I don't associate it. It's the one negative thing I have to say about Jamie Lee Curtis. The rest is all positives. Exactly. That being said, I do like that morgue scene because it's just really weird and creepy that a dead body gets up. And I... Oh, I don't... dislike it it just you it seems to be suggesting another aspect

of you know what these ghosts can do and are doing and then it just doesn't really they don't really pursue it and as we talked about in the it follows episode like i'm not so much a horror movies have to follow rules guy it's nice when they do but they all veer off course eventually and i was having an it follows conversation about this online

Just today. It's like. I'm not going to the fog. Or it follows for fucking reality. This does not need to be a fucking Swiss watch. I don't think that's fun. I think. You gave me some loose rules and it kind of works or it doesn't based on if it's actually scary. No, that's fair. I don't dislike the scene. I think it actually is pretty effective. So effective that I wish they had done a little more with it. I do, yes. I wish there was a little bit more of that vein happening, but...

I think when they got back to these reshoots, they had a very limited amount of time and a very limited amount of money, and they went for the biggest impacts they possibly could. That morgue scene, a reshoot. There you go. It should be noted that there's a bunch of John Carpenter players in this movie. You have Adrian Barbeau who's in his TV movie and he marries. I don't know if it's just before or just after this.

You have Tom Atkins, you have Jamie Lee Curtis and Nancy Loomis. And then Charles Cyphers plays Dan the Weatherman. Dan the Horny Weatherman. Dan the Weatherman has a last name and it's famously easy to get along with Dan O'Bannon. Dan, who is willing to look past DJ Stevie Wayne's terrible taste in music. Like, I am the only guy in town who listens.

Not just for your voice. Will you go to dinner with me after midnight? Where? Where are you going for dinner? They're just going to stop at the gas station. They're sweeping up. She's on until one, for Christ's sakes. I just found it. And the mortician, or at least the guy in the morgue, is Dr. Fibes.

Oh, is that right? Yeah. Buck Flower plays Tommy Wallace. Like, these are all fucking in-jokes. John Carpenter's character is Ben Tramer. That's right. That's right. He is, isn't he? He's listed as Bennett Tramer, but it's Ben Tramer. Oh, poor Ben Tramer. The alternate universe, Ben Tramer. Wait, no! He would have still been alive. You have to wait for him to be killed off.

But also, in Halloween II, he's a teenager. He's like a high school student, and then John Carpenter's very much not a high school student. No, he isn't. Well, unless he was held back for several years. We've got a Christine level held back and returned to high school in the GI Bill situation. I also feel like... John Carpenter is Ben Tramer can hold his alcohol a lot better. That he doesn't immediately panic when he sees a police car.

Yeah, and I think he, you know, John Carpenter would say, you know, hey, stop chasing me, what's going on? Yeah, he would just take off the fucking mess. Like, what the fuck your deal? But... And another thing about this movie that I feel lends itself to Carpenter is it... basically boils down to an extended version of Assault on Precinct 13, where you have a small group of people who end up taking refuge in one location. But that is at the very end. Right.

Mrs. Cobrit gets it. And she gets it again. We get some nice, squishy, tearing noises. Listen, the sound design in this. Top notch. is flawless. And I would say that for me, Rob Bottin's designs here are cool. Like, you don't see a lot of it, but what you see is cool.

Yeah, I like that you only catch a glimpse here and there of what they actually look like. They're rotting corpses. I mean, you know, I got to say it, for leopard ghosts, they're holding themselves together pretty good. I mean, these are top-tier fish toys. Toilets, these ones. Yeah. Should I create another list?

On Letterboxd for fish toilets so that everyone knows exactly what we're talking about. Yeah, I guess we got a couple fish toilets because we did, you know, Creepshow has a big old one. Oh, yeah. We had two fish toilets. If you got three, you got a trend going. Yeah, and Leslie Nielsen is a future fish toilet. And people have responded over the course of here. Like, if you can remember all of our dirty peanuts, if you can remember all of our fish toilets, please let us know.

Yeah, I think they definitely count as fish toys. And again, like Father Malo should have smelt them coming. He's just like, oh, you're here. And yes, because they smell like rotted seawater. But for whatever reason, when Tom Atkins picks up that half-empty beer can and he just can't help himself, it's like, there might still be beer in here. And takes a swig, he's like, oh, it's seawater. That would be evident because of the smell of seawater. But it's in a beer can. He has to swallow it, Gina.

You don't put a beer can that has liquid in it in front of Tom Atkins and not expect to drink it. not not to to uh to harp on that whole you know it was a different time when we were kids but yeah there's a lot of stuff there's a lot of uh you couldn't do that anymore behavior exhibited here like hitchhiking uh leaving your child attended for 10 to 12 hours and stretch. Picking up beer cans and just drinking out of them. Going home to have sex with someone you've just met. Within the hour.

Oh, boy. Playing a radio format that is 24 says light jazz. Yeah. I don't want this. episode to go on longer than the run time of the movie yeah I mean look if you've not seen this yet and you're expecting another Halloween, you're not going to get it. It's not as fast-paced as Halloween. It's not as scary as Halloween, but I think it's got a lot of great.

And it's charming. Old-fashioned ghost story vibes to it. And I think that's what they're going for is an old-fashioned ghost story. And, you know, it all, you know, Dan the weatherman gets it and then Mrs. Coberts gets it. those are more hiding the weenie style. They wander into hallways and you're basically getting sound effects deaths. Yeah, and they...

They have the same MO. They knock on the door for whatever reason. Oh, again, yeah. You know, another thing you don't see people doing anymore, answering the door when you're not expecting. Yes. What are, what would the, what would these fish toilet ghosts do now? Press a ring.

camera and you're like... I was going to say, you're looking on that app and you're like, nope. I'm not answering that. Stay outside. You get on that speaker, please step off my porch. Thank you. My name is Paul and this is between y'all's situation for sure.

My relatives were not here when that happened. So these soggy spooks wander up to the church, and they try to hold them off, and it doesn't take them long. It only takes them so long before they start. busting down shit wood. Listen, those shots, the hands coming through the stained glass, those are good. They're good. There's good shit here. You just have to set your expectations for what it is.

And then they basically, basically, Father Malone has found this gold cross and is like, okay, well, what I'll do is I'll sacrifice myself and I'll give them back the gold cross. You know, easy peasy. And then it turns into a Pink Floyd laser show. They basically cook them via cross. Like, they conduct heat through cross. And it goes, through it.

And then they all disappear and everyone goes, well, that was crazy. And then somebody remembered how to count. Just like, okay, we'll see you at pancake breakfast. And everyone else leaves and the father alone is like. Hey, they didn't finish killing everyone. I got five fingies here. They were looking for six. And before you know it, they take off his head. I literally love how he's like counting and he's like... I guess I game the system, me.

Oh, well. Certainly not going to come back to bite me in the ass. But you weren't willing to sacrifice. This is the thing. Like, he set himself up to sacrifice himself, and then he does. He just doesn't see it coming.

Yeah, generally speaking, it is not a good idea that if you are expecting to be killed by a vengeful ghost, and the vengeful ghost does not in fact kill you, you should avoid... asking why not out loud because they as they're floating back to to you know wherever like you know ghost dimension they came from

You're going to hear a little record scratch noise. They're going to turn around and come right back. That's why I don't leave my phone in the car when I go into the grocery store because I know I'm going to get a text. And then I'm going to get caught. I'm putting groceries into the car. I'm like, fuck, we need orange juice.

I was going to say, they're going to need some more shit. And you're going to be like, oh, I should have taken my phone in. We forgot to kill the sixth person. Look at us. I shouldn't have asked why the ghost didn't kill me. We're a group, guys. Let's figure this out. We don't have all the time in the world.

But yeah, they take off Father Malone's head. Nice little splat noise at the end. I love it. Love it. Love that closing splat. And so it feels like it's time to celebrate the centennial of...

Choose your own death venture. That's where we decide of the deaths in this film. If we were to die in one of those ways, which one would we choose and why? Oh, forbid. We have stabbed through the back with a sword and then stabbed in the chest with a knife. Or we just get hacked with a bunch of multiple hooks. Poked in the eyes a couple times. That's number three. That guy gets stabbed in the eyes a bunch of times. But he's also drowned?

Because the coroner says he looks like he's been down under the water longer than those divers that we found off that shipwreck. So they're both stabbed and wet. Then we got Dan, who's stabbed in the neck by a hook. And then Mrs. Kobritz, who is mauled by ghosts. They just... They're all ripping at the wishbone, I guess.

I don't know why she gets that level of death. That seems a lot. But there you go. And then, of course, you're warmed up by a cross, then decapitated. You know, I know that I just said you don't. When you're expecting to get killed by a vengeful ghost, they don't ask why. But I would do that. I would absolutely be dumb enough to question.

why this did not happen. And then also not smell them coming. So, yeah, I'm definitely getting my head cut off with a little extra at the end. I gotta have that extra splat. Yeah, there's only one way to go, and that's decapitated suddenly from behind by a ghost. I don't care that I'm warmed up from the inside via Gold Cross conductivity. Just, you know, turn around, surprise, and then that's it.

I wonder why. So that just about does it. Folks, you can find us on the socials out there, whether it's Blue Sky or Threads or Instagram or Facebook. Rate and review us on iTunes. Talk back to us on YouTube or Spotify. All those things are great. Tell your friends about us. That's right. come and visit us over on Patreon, where we've got tons of bonus episodes for you, like our Q&A show called Chat by Chat, bonus apps, and we have...

What do we have? Commentaries. Gina, where can people find you on these here internets? I write about movies and television and pop culture on my sub stack, GinaWatchesThings.substack.com. And I am on Blue Sky and Instagram under Gina Does This. Do it today, people. Check it out. Don't worry, folks. The body count will continue. for myself and for Gina. Bye-bye, everybody. Bye!