#158 Ebrahim Turner – Turning Internal State into External Reality

The only thing I did differently to everyone else was I just didn't stop . I just kept . That was literally it . I wasn't smarter , i wasn't more well connected , i didn't have any extra advantages . I figured it all out by myself , like my parents didn't give me anything . I just didn't stop . That was it , and it was not easy .

Why do you think you felt like that anxious and fear all of a sudden , because I built my business based on fear Fear of not wanting to go into nine to five , fear of not wanting to work until 60 . Get an okay marriage , maybe have some kids , and then be a slave .

And I looked around at all my peers and they were all smarter than me intellectually is what it is . And I saw them getting rejected from job after job after job at six , seventh stage interviews And I thought I don't have this thing for me , man , i don't know if this is for me .

And so I decided to take the path of entrepreneurship And I thought you know what worst case scenario . I tried business for a couple of years . I fail , i can always go back and apply , and that was the decision I made never applied for a single job . Parents were slightly surprised .

They invested a lot of money in me to figure out economics And it was the best thing I ever did , because it got me to that realization of internal state equals external reality . How , how did that happen ? When I started the agency in my early 20s , i wanted to do it for one main reason freedom , time , location , financial like most people in their 20s .

Right , they want freedom , they want to be able to be here in Bali , they want to be able to chill , go surfing , do whatever they want . And what I found was from actually attaining that . I remember a hyper . I just released a video of my YouTube channel with Iman from years ago at this point And it was like SMMA owner making 20K a month or something .

And he was interviewing me because I was in his course to ask what I was doing and as a student client testimonial kind of thing . And I was looking back at that video because my editor just posted it yesterday .

And I was looking back at that young boy version of myself thinking , okay , so he's in the nice apartment in London in North London where he always wanted to be . He had his dream girlfriend at the time .

Everything looked great , but internally I was anxious , i was borderline depressed , I was very unhealthy inside , i had no impulse control , i was driven by my lower ego And so I realized that my external reality looked good and everyone actually looked up to me And everyone thought , oh , he knows what he's doing , he's the man , he's crushing it , and all that did

was amplify how shit I felt internally . And so what happened was during COVID . I remember traveling to Greece to try and escape the lockdown . Actually , it was as the UK was going back into lockdown . Do you remember what it was going like in and out of lockdown ? That's when I came here , man .

Yeah Well , good decision , because I went to Greece , which wasn't in lockdown . The day I arrived , greece went into lockdown And I was with an ex at the time . They wouldn't even let us get in the same taxi . Yeah , we just I just flown her to another country . They wouldn't even let us get in the same taxi . Same in Thailand and Mexico .

I was also there And tried everywhere , so it was an absolute pain in the up . Basically , we were going to go around the Greek islands , had this grandiose plan , had to just stay in Athens , which look , not complaining beautiful Airbnb's , got to live that . But here's the thing whilst all that was happening , inside , i was just driven by fear .

I was waking up anxious , i was going to bed anxious , and that was my state of being , and what happened was I kept thinking this is all going to fall apart . I don't deserve this . I'm not worthy of this . How have I even attained this ? And that was , that was the loop going on in my head , right .

And so what happened was one day in a 24 hour period , i lost half of my clients Cancellation , cancellation , cancellation , cancellation , cancellation , cancellation .

And what was interesting about that when that happened was you would think that would be , i would be really upset about that , but it was actually relief Because the reality of that was actually so much easier than what it was in my head , because I thought my whole life was over if that happened .

And so that was when I realized , okay , there's something to this in something to do with what goes on here . You talk , you hear manifestation , you hear law of attraction , all these things thrown around . I just think all that was complete . You have to swear on this . Yeah , of course , i thought this was complete bullshit , like complete and utter bullshit .

But what I realized was here's the thing I was manifesting all of the things I did not want . And so I ended up losing half my client bases . Relationship ended , business half started falling apart . I was in really bad health , full of injuries , lost a lot of weight . For some reason , i became vegetarian . I don't know why did that . You were really losing .

I was really losing . That's how you know . That's how you know , bro , i did vegetarian for a whole year .

Before Andrew Tate had started talking about the matrix , i knew in my head it was literally like and look , i have nothing against people in jobs , loads of my good friends are in work . It just wasn't for me . But it literally felt like okay , option A is going to the matrix , option B is not Option A . I know the path that's going to lead down Option B .

I have no idea and no proof and no support , but something about this unknown thing . I'm just going to follow that intuition . So it was the logical mind versus the intuition , and for some reason I followed that intuition which was going into business , and so that's what led me to that point .

Jordan Peterson referenced the heaven and hell analogy , which I think comes from K and enable , which you might be familiar with , which is like where you can get to if everything works and where things will fall apart if you don't get up and fucking start moving .

It's like no , you do , you just don't have the right motivations . If I told you , if you get out of bed at 6am , go to the gym , train , do your outreach , get on sales calls and you're guaranteed to become a millionaire in five years , they're going to be motivated . If they knew that contraction that was going to happen , right .

So it was just a lack of the right motivation .

Fear was a great motivator at the beginning . The problem was I was too driven by that fear And what happened was I didn't realize that , and so that fear never left me . And so that constant fear of maybe losing it is what happened , that is what manifested , because that's what I was thinking on repeat in my head .

Right , thoughts create feelings , feelings create actions , actions create your reality . And so that was the reality I created .

If you have zero dollars or zero clients or zero business , how the fuck can you think abundantly ? But so you are going to be in a scarcity point . but there needs to be an inflection point whereby you start thinking okay , this is going to work , i'm going to make this work And I don't need to be going to bed worried every night to your point .

How do you change that ? When you made that change ?

Because if you're telling yourself , i'm abundant , i'm a successful guy , and you'll shout on that in front of the mirror , like many people would say , i completely disagree with that , because if you don't believe it , then you're actually just subconsciously reinforcing the fact that you are not that person . You're not there , you don't have that success , right ?

So there's a middle ground , and the middle ground is to say , okay , i'm not there yet , that's reality , that's objective truth . Right , It starts with just acceptance of the facts . This sounds simple , but you'd be shocked for myself and many , many other people who just do not accept the facts of their current reality , particularly in this online space .

Right , particularly in Bali . Right , you meet these guys and they'll say X , y and Z , they're putting up this stuff online . And then you meet them in person as I'm sure you've met a lot of guys in person And you realize , oh , this is the truth . It is not anything like what is being reported here . Right , for probably more people than not that I meet .

And so why is that ? It's because they're living out of fear and insecurity And therefore they're perpetuating that more . So the solution to that is to start by just accepting okay , where actually am I right now ? Okay , i'm in debt . Okay , like I don't have a girlfriend right now .

Okay , i'm addicted to porn , whatever those facts are , because then you can build an action plan . Only then , once you know where you're actually at .

Otherwise , you're continually building off this shaky house of cards foundation where , okay , you maybe get a few strategies here , a shiny object you found on YouTube , get a little bit of success , but then it all comes tumbling down again because there was no real foundation in the first place .

So that's the starting point , right , that's where you begin from , and then it's just about actually putting in the action , without expectation of needing that result instantly . Because there is this . I'll tell you a story from my own experience with my own agency . Right , one of my my close is Freddie .

He's 20 , most of my team are around that age And he was having a hard month on closing . He actually had , he actually had a few full throats with clients , so he ended up not getting very much commission . And he said to me look , brola , i've been putting in all this work and I haven't really seen much result .

My brother , who works in the supermarket , is going to get paid more money than me this month , right , and I was like , man , that's tough , like for real , that is tough . But what have you gained in this last month ? What wisdom have you gained ? How much further are you towards your goals with the skills that you've acquired compared to your brother ?

And he was like , huh , yeah , okay , i've actually become incredible at sales . I've communicated with all these business owners XYZ . And I said to him look , this is the point where most people fail , right ? You see that analogy of that , that gap in the big mountain where you fall down .

I was like you're right at that point right now And all you have to do is decide to continue and just not stop . The only way to fail is to stop . Whenever people ask me about failure , i'm like I just didn't stop Been doing the agency for seven years . I just didn't stop doing it . That was the only thing I did . I just didn't stop doing it . Right .

And the next day He had a full calendar full of appointments and he signed and he had his best ever week , that week of all time in terms of what he earned in commissions . Because he went over that point and he trusted . And I said to him and he said , yeah , but how do I know if that's true ?

And I said , well , i'm not asking you to believe it's true , i'm just asking you to temporarily suspend your disbelief . That is true . Just remove the mind for a moment . You've come here because you see me as a mentor . You know I can fast track you to where you want to get to truck . Just trust me , trust my word , right .

And sometimes you just have to put your trust into something and just blindly follow it for a period of time , because that's how you get over that hurdle , right . And sometimes you just got to do that and it might not work out . It's not guaranteed to work out , but you will almost certainly get further than if you didn't .

I like the aspect of okay , this is the plan , this action plan , and then just doing it . You know what I mean . Now to your point there . but I've become like make your first million . It is literally a combination of us doing as much outbound as possible , as much fulfillment as possible , not fucking it up .

Get in case studies you have one , then you have four , then you have eight , then you have 12 . You know , it just kind of like it's meant to be boring And I think people get bored of the process . They're like , oh you know , looking at a man or looking at you or looking at like a Mac Kelly or whatever It's like exciting for them .

But man , i know for a fact Matt was saying that how like urge and difficult his process of just even testing products . it could be nine months . He could be looking at powder , you know , and he's gone through so much different difficulties . So I think that's like very , very valuable to know like that , seven years even at this .

And to your point , when I had a chat with Matt , i asked him . I said to him , because he's done , you know , 25 , 30 million or something in the e-com , right ? And I said why have you been successful at this when there are there are a graveyard of e-com stores , same as Sarah Dupst By hundreds of thousands of people . And I said why ?

And he said because I actually focused on the product . How crazy is that ? That was the light bulb answer . He actually focused on building a good product And , to the point of that , i knew about him through his product first , before really knowing about him , and I thought it was a great product And that was how I found out about him first .

So I was like that shows the truth . But people , i'll tell you one more story . Last night I was at dinner and a bunch of young guys and everyone was asking about different mindsets , right Of being earning 10K a month , 100k a month , a million , a billion . And someone asked me have you ever like , do you have any billionaire friends ?

And I said I've hung out with a couple billionaires and they were like oh , what are the secrets , what are the hacks ? And I was like , honestly , i learned the least from them . I learned because it's so unrelatable to where they're at and the things that they're doing .

They're like in verbier , skiing , smoking cigars , eating cheese all day and they have one meeting with someone for an hour and that's the next like $100 million business , right ? That's what it's like at that level . That is not what it's like when you're on the come up . That's also not what they did to get there .

I know they spent their entire life working 80 hours a day to get to that point And it is that the one thing I did say when they were asking me . They said just give me one answer . Okay , they just did one thing for their whole life consistently .

If you look at billionaires , almost all of them just did one thing . There are some who have done multiple billion dollar companies . There are a few , but the vast majority of them just did one thing consistently well for a really long period of time and just didn't fuck it up .

So , firstly , just on that , from like a data perspective , my podcast has had people that are like to your point , like 100 million , 500 million , like net worth or how companies are of that value , and those episodes do horrific in comparison to someone like yourself , who's just a little bit older than me , who's relatable , who's young , who's actually doing this

stuff , and you're like 10 or 100 steps ahead , not a million miles ahead , right , and that's like why it's so ridiculous . To be honest in the first place And to your point , we're doing the one thing right .

So , as I mentioned earlier , my background was in finance , technology , whatever , like startups , like startup world , but I was doing so many different shit . I was options trading , i was working in five , i was doing coaching for people who were coming into these tech roles right , because my podcast was a creative podcast .

I had like a lot of opportunity to just do like consulting stuff not scalable , but a good actually business , but not scalable . What else was I doing ? I was doing loads of shit , man , and it was all just a waste of time from a financial perspective . I got a lot of out of it , whatever , but none of it was .

I had like eight different verticals and they were all meaningless to some degree . And now I've just done one thing , which is the podcast thing , which is combination of agency and my stuff , of course , and it's fucking propelled forward as a result .

Now it's not the same stage that you're at , because of course you're in seven years , but I just think it's way . It's funnier . And I don't know if you're familiar with Marcus Hussle at all Yeah , yeah , he's on my show , great guy . I referenced this point about a fight 100 times every episode . He said it's called the shower test .

When you're in the shower and you're washing your hair , you have one thing to think about . You're not thinking of four different shit , even one thing . And then , as you scale that to where you're probably at , then you can start thinking about other things like masterminds and coaching programs and all that kind of stuff .

But you need to have that one vehicle and just commit to the process and shut the fuck up and just do the work you know , but you needed to go through that process .

This is why sometimes I don't think anything's a waste of time , because all of the skills and knowledge you acquired from that have got you to this point And now you've learned that lesson . Right Now you've really learned that lesson and you focused and now you're getting that growth . And actually I would say you learned that lesson really young .

You learned that lesson in your 20s . A lot of people don't learn that lesson until way later on in life . So I think we can choose our perspective . You decide , it's down to you , right ? So my thing is why not just choose to look at it in a way that actually serves you , and then it becomes a benefit ?

I didn't love the process , i didn't love the people I was helping . It was just a means to an end . It was just a way to earn 10 , 20k a month and have a lifestyle business . And I did that for a long time . And here's the thing It got me to that point of freedom , like I said right In those first year or two or something like that .

And then , once I'd attained that , i'd met that vision , i'd manifested it , i'd visualized it , and I hit that point . And I remember specifically , i was sitting on this Airbnb at the top on the roof in Greece , with a glass of wine , looking at the sunset , and I was like , oh , i'm exactly where I wanted to be those couple of years ago .

And then I just lost all motivation because I was there , goal achieved Right , and so then that's when things went down , that's when things stagnated Because I hadn't yet assigned new meaning or like a vision to that . What was the point of it ?

And so , after doing that , going on more of a spiritual journey , realizing that actually I get more fulfilled from coaching people and working with people that's what led me into coaching . And then it was only last year I realized that coaching is what I love to do . If I look at this agency , how can I apply that to it ?

And I did this very good exercise that I recommend people do Write down what you enjoy doing . Don't worry about how it relates to business , just write down the things that you enjoy . One of the things I enjoyed was just genuinely giving people support , help , advice and seeing them actually propel .

I always had mentors when I was younger , and the reason why I was able to get really good mentors is because I would do the shit they said straight away And then they'd be really happy seeing that I'd actually done something with it , and so that's what I was doing .

And basically , at a certain point I realized last year I'm here to coach people I like , that's what I get fulfilled by . So then I started to grow the agency . I started looking at these guys . I was already coaching . They started working with me with my agency , and I was able to coach them in their roles in the agency .

So they do better , they grow , they earn more , they develop way faster And I get to coach them and , as a result , the business grows . And so that was how I was able to find that fulfillment in the work , because there were so many years where I was like I don't like being an agency owner , i don't like the identity of it , xyz , why I just didn't .

I didn't enjoy it . I didn't enjoy it , so that was why I didn't like it . Why did you enjoy it , though I didn't get fulfillment out of ?

So I realized the coaching thing . I realized that I get more out of coaching people and seeing them grow . I also realized from helping tons of real estate agents or estate agents in the UK , we can send them loads of leads . Some of them would crush it and we have , you know , give me the best testimony story for us .

Others would get shittled and do nothing with the exact same leads And it took me , at my dumb self , a while to realize that , oh , it's actually because of them . I used to think it was just , oh , it's just the leads . So if Facebook was having a bad day , i was having a bad day And a good friend of mine Matt Shields his name is .

He grew a real estate agency from zero to 300K in 12 months , did a multi seven figure exit recently at 21 , just turned 22 . And he'd be great on your podcast . By the way , i had him on mine . Yeah , he's . I'll cook you up with him if you want to have to do a podcast . Absolutely , man .

He showed me his model , he showed me what he was doing And he showed me that he wasn't just sending these guys leads , they're actually coaching them , they're actually providing a program content , actual coaching for the agents they were working with . And , lo and behold , the results were 10 times better , because now they're not just a lead gen company .

That , because whatever the service is right that you or I provide , it can be easily commoditized . Let's be honest , right , look at accounting , perfect industry . So if you think a bookkeeper has been , you know , a good , solid job for many , many years , then zero comes along . quick books comes along . Now it's automated . So what does the ?

what do they have to do ? They have to up level , provide consultancy , provide something that's harder to outsource , right , the skill set and the knowledge . And so I looked at the agency in the same way , and so we created a hybrid agency where we call .

The first thing we say when we get on our demo call is we are not a lead generation company And I'm like what I'm like yes , we will send you leads . However , we're also going to be coaching you . There's also going to be a mastermind . There's also going to be group calls .

There's also prop university , which is our course content for the agents , and these things are essential . Yeah , like , if you want to get the guarantee that we promised you on the front end a nice sexy guarantee you have to do these things , And so now they're buying is so much more right , and this is the key to really get people to succeed .

Even when I'm coaching someone coach six , seven , some eight figure entrepreneurs I only coach them if they're bought in .

I'm not here to help anyone who doesn't want to do the work , because they're not going to be successful and it's going to be a waste of time , and I tell the agents that And so that was really the key shift into anyone who is running an online service business or any kind of business .

I would say , adds that into it , because that's what also builds the relationship . Yeah , i'll tell you straight Some of our best clients , who we've got the most insane results for , would leave Some of the longest standing clients that we've had for like three plus years we've got mediocre results for . To be honest , they're okay . Are they positive ?

Sure , just about , but it's the relationship that kept them in . So by doing that , you actually increase the LTV anyway . Right , and this really is the key We're going . We're going more into AI . We're using more AI now We just got about to install an AI appointment , so it's going to be awesome .

But at the same time , we're also going more into personalization . So we're working with these two opposing sides of in the world of automation , which is great . We want to automate stuff . It's efficient . People are craving personalization and connection more than ever . So we said , okay , how can we bring that into the agency ?

How can we customize , personalize , give people that premium feel little things . Send them a gift , give them a call out , give them a call out of the blue . You know just like , have a bit of extra time with them . You know , really awesome , what their wins are like , get to know their family .

These little things that a lot of guys , including myself in this space , maybe just haven't been taught that in the agency course or whatever online business course that they took . Right , because it's about how to get clients , it's not about how to fulfill clients , and so these are like the soft skills . That don't necessarily get taught in an online course .

They get taught through experience .

I didn't have to pay my customer success manager a bunch after then pay the person who's calling the leads for them . I didn't have to pay for software . So it's like as .

Do you think I want to keep spending to acquire , or do you think if I just make a client last six months to 12 months , i've just doubled not just the overall revenue but the profit , because that six months you're not paying anything ?

That's where , like , your business is actually going to grow as well , because you're going to see that You funny , you said there , but the strategy point of view , so obviously my agency is like podcast work , right , and to a degree there's output . So four episodes a month , 20 clips a month , whatever .

But I always say it's not to do with output , it's to do with outcome . And yeah , we have a load of guys who will do the editing and do the copywriting and stuff .

But I'll be there with you to hold your hand and to renavigate and get back on track and I'll give them like a spreadsheet of things when it's working , when it's not working , how to change it .

And they pay more for the strategy calls than anything else And we're just talking , we're just going back and forth , whatever , and they'll make those small adjustments . And which is what ?

which is hilarious because , as I always hit them as well , like you could do this work yourself to a certain degree of quality , but of course it's plausible , but you lose out in all the information that you're building , and that's what I've spent the last three years working on . You know what I mean , myself personally . I think I love that .

I love that approach

. I want to ask about how you maintain your endurance through the agency . It's been seven years now . How did you maintain your actual love for it ? How come you didn't pivot in something else ?

You wake up , you're tired , you're client canceled , someone wants to refund . Oh , is this really worth it ? Do I really want this lifestyle ? Maybe I'll just stop , right , the only thing I did differently to everyone else was I just didn't stop , i just kept .

That was literally it , dude , i wasn't smarter , i wasn't more well connected , i didn't have any extra advantages . I figured it all out by myself , like my parents didn't give me anything . I just didn't stop . That was it . That was not easy . It's simple , but not easy , Right . If you ever heard that it's so simple .

All you have to do is set appointments , sign clients and fulfill them and just continue to do that process , and do it well , over a long period of time . But because there are so many shiny objects , there's always this new thing Marketers are so freaking smart in our space . They know how to get you onto the next thing , the next opportunity .

Everyone pivots to . You know , like the guy you mentioned , doing only fans agencies or whatever it is , and you can do well in it , and a lot of people do And a bunch of guys who do that . But the problem is , is then , when that dies out which it will then , okay , crap , what's the next thing ? Is it going to be a Web3 agency ?

Right , and it's just this continuous cycle . And to me it's like , well , if I can't make one thing work , why am I going to make that thing work ?

Right , it's looking at the next shiny object , which is really just a band aid , because for me , coming back to internal state , that is the root cause , right , it's working on the self , working on growing yourself , the entrepreneur . Why is it you have 15,000 people in E-Mongalty's course ? only 500 to 1,000 have made six figures . Let's .

I don't know the numbers , but let's just say that's true . Because of them , yeah , they had access to exactly the same thing . So to me it was just obvious Why don't I just work on myself , work on this , this internal world , right ?

And then that's really been how I've been able to sustain those ups and downs , because I know , no matter what the down is , no matter . Even in the last 24 hours I had a bunch of fires that happened . A bunch of different things happened all in 24 hours where me a couple years ago would have been all over the place would have been stressed .

But knowing how to manage that internal state . Okay , five minutes do the inner work , i'm good to go , and then I'm back And it's business as usual .

Did you ever change your perspective , like , want to move to Dubai , get a lot of Rolexes ?

Before that , i only wanted the freedom right . So , essentially , if I had the freedom and this is all subconscious right Most people don't even realize this is what's going on . This is why the inner work is so key , subconsciously . Okay , i've achieved what I've wanted to achieve . So if I've got surplus cash , why not spend it on XYZ ? I did a few .

I did a few few things , bought a few watches , all that kind of stuff , but I just really I , for whatever reason , i just realized it didn't bring me fulfillment And so , yeah , i didn't necessarily like , like , change my perspective much . I was never super motivated by the , the really materialistic things . I would see it right . What's what's ?

I forget what the word is like . Memetic desires right When you , when you desire what you see somebody else has right . So you see the guy on YouTube with the Lamborghini . You just desire that , just because he has it . But do you do you actually want that ? Because that's what a lot of people do . Right , they see it , they pursue it .

Sometimes they even get it . That's the worst point . If you actually get it , you can no longer say I'll be happy when I have that , because you have it And you're still depressed .

So that's obviously a part of conditioning where it's like get the job , get the mortgage , be happy , or Work this job , be miserable , but be happy whatever you're working in life , but at the same time , in the online space There's like that Lambo Bugatti , you know , facade , which is the same type of conditioning .

It's like you're getting into this business so that you could only go by those things , which is like the wrong way to look at it . And you have the same with the people who are escaping one matrix to be actually put into another one .

Jacko willing says discipline equals freedom . I can completely agree with that , and it's . And it's actually way harder when you're running a business because you have nobody telling you What to do , and that's what we're discussing about meeting up and doing other stuff , man , because even with your girlfriend I'm my girlfriend , i'm in top two .

That Which is why you have accountability partner or you work with mentors or influences . You know .

business Really common thing that I see with with a lot of guys who speak to and I said , well , like what your conversations with her ? He's like well , yeah , i just built this new Python programming and I run her through all of that . I was like I was like dude , like no wonder , man , she , she doesn't give a shit and neither should she give a shit .

Right , that's not what she's there to support you for . She's there to provide you like emotional support , spiritual protection , to nurture you , to rejuvenate you , not to continue your work day Right , and so like with my girlfriend .

While I won't ask her maybe like okay , what do you think about this Strategic business move , i will say hey , i'm looking at hiring this new closer . You want to just like get a vibe for his Sense . What is your intuition ?

say , because I know that's on point and I know and I trust that she's a good judge of people , right , and so I think , when it comes to like girlfriends , they can't you can bring them in , but look at what their actual strengths are , because as men , we we think so logically , right And we want that . Okay , like , go , like babe .

What outreach strategy should I be doing ? like , should I be using Facebook or Instagram ? But that's exactly what your guy friends are for , right and that , and that's why I love hanging out , like . I hang out mostly with men .

I have a lot of female friends , but I hang out mostly with men because they're helping me get towards that mission more , which is what more my focus is .

. You know , it's difficult to build up that , that Influence , i guess , and like what were some of your like earlier mentors or influences , because you were in a man's course .

But even before that , the first ever mentor I would say Was Tyler Pez .

I always have that in my head . Yeah , he was the , the influence for me . Saw his ads , saw his Lamborghini ads . Every I remember everyone I was in university was taking a piss out of this guy doing it , doing his American accent here , my , here , my garage . And Eventually I was like , well , let me see what this thing's about .

And that was the first ever course I bought . It was $67 . Why do you ?

It's not that it's just a complete fraud , it's just that it's usually depicted in a way to make it seem easier or like you'll be more successful than you actually will be , because that's not what sells you . Right to your point earlier about why don't people teach fulfillment because they can't fulfill and it's not sexy . So why would they talk about it ?

Right , it doesn't make any sense . So , yeah , going back to him , he taught me two things . One read books to Get a mentor . So I was like alright , i went to his website and he had like top hundred books . Because this dude , his thing was I read a book a day , right , that was his whole like thing . How does he even do that ?

He's probably not reading every page , obviously , right , but just like Licking , true , yeah , pretty . But and he , you know , he had thousands of books all over his house and garage and whatever , right . And So I bought a bunch of books , started reading them and instantly it just shifted my consciousness , shifting my understanding .

You know , i'm reading biographies of Steve Jobs , of Arnold Schwarzenegger , reading business books , reading startup books , personal development books , and suddenly like my whole reality is changing because I'm putting instead of garbage into my brain . You know , garbage in , garbage out . I start to put in good things .

And so in my head now I'm like okay , reading books , i need this mentor thing . Like where do I get where ? where do all these mentors hang out ? I need to find like , where's the club , where you go get one of these mentors , right and And again , what you focus on is what you create , right .

I was just looking for it and a guy came in to do a workshop at my university called markers . He ran a marketing agency . He was exactly 10 years older than me and he was like the most successful agency , i think , in Europe . By this was by Google , depicted by Google , so like really successful .

And I just walked up to him at the end I was like , hey , shitting myself . I was so nervous , this little kid . I was like can I , can I work for you for free , right ? and in my head I was like , yeah , i'll provide him all this value and then he'll want to mentor me . And He just looked at me and he smiled and he laughed and he's just said no .

It really nicely . He said no . He said but let's go for coffee . Now I realized in hindsight the reason he said no and the reason I say no now to a lot of people who are the same thing is Because you're more of an asset , you're more of a liability , sorry , than an asset .

Like you think you can help them , but actually you're costing them so much by being Just yeah , but by being there , right , and you're not actually adding value or taking way more value . And so we just started Going for coffees . And here's the thing We just became friends . You just we just got , we just got on .

And then whenever he'd give me some little tidbit , i'd go and do it . And After doing that for a while and I was learning Facebook ads back then , because I was learning a hard skill as well I was like ready to figure this out . I remember spending like 2k on this Facebook ads course and it was insanely complex .

Like Facebook ads back then were like Literally like freaking rocket science . Like the amount of shit you had to know to run a Facebook ad compared to now is was insane . And He said oh , like we don't run Facebook ads . We have this client who we've had for years , who wants to run Facebook ads , like , do you want to run them for them ?

And I was like , wow , okay , i can either go one shit , i've never done this before and I have no idea what to do or I can just go for it . And I said yeah . And he said , okay , cool , yeah , just Do the work and just bill me whatever your hourly rate is .

So the first thing I did was I went home , i went to my computer and I googled average hourly rate of a marketing executive And it was I think it was 90 pounds per hour or 80 pounds per hour . And so , yeah , i just I did the work and Build him . At the end He paid me instantly , without asking any questions .

But the main thing I learned from that experience was belief , because he believed in me enough to say you can , yeah , go and do this . And it wasn't a big deal to him . He didn't even think about it , it wasn't this big thing in his head . He was just like , yeah , you can go do that . And that gave me the belief .

And really all of this just comes down to self-belief , right ? And so if you're aware of that and I was aware of that . I then just Use that . That was all I needed to just go like , all right , one step , i need what . Give me , give me one opening , give me that foot in the door and I'll go . And now , here I am , my new identity .

I now do this for businesses . Yeah , this is what . This is my expertise , this is my skill and that was how I started .

So funny , you said that my first like role was with a start-up in Ireland and I met and I was like I wanted I was a corner university and I was still in university and I wanted to get experience . I messed you guy on LinkedIn and I goes , i will work for you for free . I was like a fucking basic analyst , whatever .

And he was like , yep , come in tomorrow . When in front interview and he paid me , paid me like a proper salary for it . I remember that was the first time I was like , okay , this internet thing , like I can meet people , i can go do something , and that was for a career .

The same time , when I started doing like other shit , i had no idea how to run an agency in order to do anything , no idea how to even speak to a team . But the second , someone else believes in you , that's when you can just back it up yourself then and every single time , then you just get better and better , and better and better .

You know it's not made up in your head like you do it true , like real-life experiences .

And eventually I was like , right , if these 14 year old kids can do it , i've got a university degree . I , i can , i can do this thing . Yeah , i can do . I had enough . I was like take the money , i'm coming in . And that course gave me one thing belief . That's what that course gave me .

Everyone shits on this course because it wasn't that great , to be honest , in terms of the actual Mechanics of it , but it gave belief because it created a new opportunity , and so actually I'd say it's one of the most valuable courses that I've spent six figures on self education at this point , that was one of the most valuable courses ever bought .

Having confidence in those areas , you can bring that into the business . Business even with your economics degree , like why University did you go to ?

When I ask you about the real estate sort of thing , so why did you , i guess , niche down into Real estate ?

So when I'm actually on the call with them , they're like , oh , like they're surprised to see me because they've seen me my face everywhere And I'll go to London sometimes and I'll have estate agents come up to me and be like . Oh you , the Facebook ads for a state agents guy .

And that was one of the moments when I was like , alright , i need to start looking at something else to do here , because that's not what I want to be known for . But Anyway , yeah , probably we've seen millions of times at this point in the UK . If you ever , if you ever do anything property related in the UK , you're gonna see my face .

And I was what was the question .

I'll be like I'll run your Facebook ads . Guys serve me pizza ? I'll run you . That was literally me . So I get so frustrated when I mentor these young guys and they're like I outreach is hard . I'm like bro .

I used to walk around with a file of facts going into business Literally going into businesses trying to show them examples of Facebook ads to be like I can do this , do you want one ? like I'll do this for you . Like , literally like that . That's why I was doing so much . Output it and I Just got .

I got a client who was an estate agent and I got really good results .

I did not know what my strengths and weaknesses are . A test I took only recently is called wealth dynamics . Highly recommend it . It's basically like a very high quality personality test for entrepreneurship Specifically , and then how you work well in a business , but also how you work well the team members and what kind of roles you need to support you .

So I'll tell you myself , as an example . I'm what's called a star . A star is my main personality type . I like big picture inspiration . I actually like shining the light on other people . That's why I have a podcast , because I love being the other way around on this , lifting people up , right . But my weaknesses are fulfillment numbers , details , dude .

It was a hard degree for me . For that reason , i'll tell you a funny story about that in a minute Organization , timing . These are just weaknesses for me , right ? I didn't know that I It was happening and I was suffering because I didn't know that that was the case . So , if I can say one other thing , it's like learn to know yourself .

That personality test is 97 bucks and that might sound like a lot of money for a personality test , but I can tell you , if you know yourself after doing that , that's well worth 97 bucks spent .

And I was doing everything and the What happened was I was doing everything and I would sell a client , fulfill a client , service a client , try and retain a client , but then I need to keep repeating that cycle , right ? So I was on .

I was on this kind of perpetual will where I'd be at like maybe five K a month , get a couple clients , but then something would drop off service delivery or whatever it was , because I was all outreach would drop off . I didn't have enough time and it was this like hamster will a lot of people go through this ?

And so I think the first person I hired I Think it was a media buyer to run the ads who I just taught myself because I knew it inside out . So it's some from the Philippines . She's been with me for since the start and she crushes it because I just taught her myself .

And then what I tried to do was I realized oh , i actually don't like doing these sales calls . I'm an introverted guy slightly , naturally , you don't seem I could . I could like turn it off , turn up , but I Hired some for sales calls . Biggest mistake I could have made because I Hired it because I didn't want to do it , not because I .

Everything was going great and I could now just like take leverage , it right . It's like people do this for outreach as well to say , okay , i hate doing outreach , i suck at outreach , so I hire a VA . Worst thing you can do , because they're all they're going to do , is perpetuate what you're already doing .

So if you're already shit at sales , that clothes is also going to be shit at sales . It doesn't matter how good they were before . It's your process . And so I got burned many , many times . Hiring a wrong salesperson is one of the most expensive mistakes you can make in business .

I hide a marketing manager to take care of the marketing . Guess what it didn't work out why ? because again , hiring out of like the wrong place and It led me on the hamster will again . So it was only when I took for responsibility to say , okay , i'm gonna master this area of the business , i'm gonna focus on that .

One area is this what I was doing with sales .

This is why I was taking a bunch of sales calls in the last month , so I can master that area , get an insanely high level of Like sales process in every single little detail by doing it myself , by being in it , and now I've got an incredible sales process that is Literally know how good it is because I know now I know all the best guys in the industry ,

so exactly what they're doing , and I can take all the best bits and I can play tomorrow in agency And now we have a great sales process right , and then we're just doing that in every division And from that point I would say , yeah , then then go and hire . Until now I have , yeah , like maybe 10 people in the team .

And I would say one other thing , just to go like super strategic with agency , the phrase I go by is when I win , you win , when you lose , i lose . My mentor , brendan , said this to me one time . I really love that .

I really really like that , cuz it's like this brotherhood you know , And so when there's a new client who comes in , freddie signs new client , everyone wins , everyone in the agency wins , cuz everyone gets a piece of that . I love that , cuz we're all on the same team , right .

And when , if a client drops , that hurts everyone and we're all in that together as well . I'm not there being a bitch and victim , but everyone's , everyone's still in that right . So we're there for the highs and the lows . And the best thing about the agency now is the culture . That is the num .

I get guys who are way over qualified wanna come and work with me , say I wanna quit my business , come and work for you . It's not cuz the business , the business is great . We , i'd say , with best at what we do at this point .

So you spent so much time on it , like no one has been doing it for as long as we have , at least in the UK , just to be there for so long , which is also why it's easier now . But it's the culture , right , and so that , again , culture only came from me take responsibility doing this in a work .

And now the culture is really , you know , it's just an extension of the business owner , extension of you , and that's what also attracts the best talent I found , cuz it gets a certain point . All you care about is who can you attract ? who are the people you can attract into your business , not clients . Who the team ? who's the team ? Because ?

And this is really key , because what can happen in when you're in a role is you can just get focused on your one thing and you can forget how it affects the team , affects the collective , and so Having that humility to say , actually I have to appear , actually I do need help , or actually I need some coaching right now or something's going on my personal life

, i need someone to talk to . Having the humility to be able to do that is essential , and so I've the new guy , hide ash . He'll probably see this . He knows 30 other closes applied for . Disposition meant almost all of them are more experienced than , but I cried him because of him , because of his personality .

He had humility , i could see he was coachable , i could see get on with the culture , and so that was why I made the decision .

Other ones are just extreme ownership . So everyone in their own role , takes complete ownership of our oldest , from my friend , matt , who runs the , that big agency . The way he put it was be the CEO of your own role , and I love that . I love that because it's ultimately taking responsibility , right ?

Those are those are a couple of them , and I used to think values with this very airy fairy and I used to think like , well , how does that affect anything ? because you can't touch culture , right ?

Otherwise , like Dude , i spent years just being a leaf in the wind , you know , just like going to do it a bit of this , doing a bit of that . I thought that's why I wanted , but I really wasn't living up to my potential . And again , like as a man , that's one of the things that fulfills us so deeply just living up to our potential .

And so , if we're growing , growth is one of our other Key values is just just continuous growth 1% better every day . So that one as well .

From a podcast with Eman CEO , paul Daly cool and very impressive guy , like one of the most impressive guys I spoke to told me that He was offered a CEO role before Eman multiple million dollar salary per year salary and he turned it down and went to Eman . Why ? Culture and what he could learn from being around Eman smart , right .

Short term versus long term ? What's the growth trajectory ? where is this going ? okay , maybe I can take a high salary now , but , like where am I really gonna go with that ? What was the long term perspective ? and the team know like we have a very clear contract by being together , by being in this unit , we're gonna grow so much quicker .

By being together , right , like that is part of the exchanges . I literally like mentoring , coaching you to grow faster , and it will ultimately get you towards your goal quicker . And even if that means they leave at some point , do their own thing awesome . I'm like super happy for them to do that that's kind of what you want as well .

And that's why , even coming from like that kind of nine to five background , for someone like me or you , it's very difficult to be in that environment because there's always a ceiling , the cap on your potential cap , on your salary cap on this . So when you do grow personally , you don't , you don't realize it , you can't even get past that point , you know .

So , having that limitless upward trajectory and , as you know , the lower end of the going badly if you don't pull yourself around , that's very valuable . You mentioned the spiritual side and the religious side . So your religious dude and you you're practicing like once a week .

Sometimes my dad was on the Indian side , so let's say he would highly encourage me to do certain things right , but they never force , flat out forced me and I know plenty of people who was like you . They were forced to do things right . They said choose whatever you want to choose . I chose none .

I chose a path of atheism , essentially for many , many years of my life , and this and finding spirituality , god , religion , whatever resonates , was one of the key things that propelled my business forward . Because Without God or something higher , you just living in a world of ego . It really like I can't get along .

If someone isn't like a flat out atheism doesn't leave in anything above themselves , we're just not going to get along . I honestly it's going to be really difficult to resonate . We have to have the same beliefs . We can be completely different religious views , but to me , if you can't think there's something bigger than just you and this physical reality .

You can just go and study science to realize that's not true . You look at science and how we got here . It is too impossible of a scenario that we got it just randomly by house sign but sometimes would say so , yeah , go to church on Sundays is called Hillsong . It's more of like a concert is the best way to sing in your dancing .

You just get you just getting in touch with God , right . But before that it was more like the spiritual side of things . So finding a guy called Joe dispenser Don't you heard of him ? he's , he's being on like quantum physics and manifestation meditation that really propelled me because I start . This is where I went inward .

I meditate for three hours a day And just focus on essentially trying to just Get inside my body , expand , you know the heart , start to feel high estates and it was like . It was like a little peanut of , like something I could feel back then because I was so closed , i was just so logical , i was so like Serious all the time .

I wasn't fun to be around . Actually had a time when I I was very much in the atheist , just mindset and I said like to myself if I died right now , would anyone really care ? show my family gonna be very upset , close friends gonna be upset . But what anyone really really care ? And honest answer was probably not .

And that shook me to my core because it made me realize I wasn't living a life true to myself . True , adrian , i was around twenty one , twenty two so good realizations to have the point , you know was because , because I start feeding myself with better inputs . That was all . It was just better inputs .

Going to my brain is it was just always getting programmed every moment , right , and If you can just accept that everything around us is programming us news , media , school you can say that's bad . Or you can say , why not just program myself with useful shit , right , and so That's the way I think about it .

And , yeah , dude , like finding God , like my , my girlfriend she grew up Catholic , actually , and she's way more on the spiritual side than me , which has been awesome to go on that journey together .

But ultimately , like , whatever the belief is , i don't really it's about like to me at this point , it's about what's useful was practical at the end of the day , what I had a sign up , a new client and , by the way , if you are religious or spiritual really helps with signing clients .

If they're also that same belief you're , i can guarantee you it becomes a lot easier to sign them because you have that common ground . Seriously .

Because because you have that mutual understanding , you know what type of person someone is if they follow some kind of faith or what , if they actually follow it and actually embody it , you can have a very strong sense of who they are .

Like I love you know oh yeah , i mean you guys have had a quite a quite the history of it hundred percent , but amongst younger people , some twenty , seven now , like it's , i would say , i don't know how much it would be very , very low percentage of the stage this is why it's , this is why it took me a long time to get here , because I'm also like .

But I got guys on my show . You might know Adam power . I don't know another guy that's in a really really good agency based in Dubai . Now he's very religious and we're talking about this on our podcast And I was just saying that it's those stories that make it so difficult for some people to unhinch from it .

You know my family like a very mom's very Christian Catholic and But that's been watered down , you know , as a result to her family , to my family and everything , which is like , of course , a shame , but that's why I like speaking people like yourself Who have a very young perspective on it , like okay , this is how you actually let it benefit your life and not

feed into all the media bullshit .

sure , have they been rewritten in times ? sure have they been manipulated in ways ? short , but do you think if you just sat down and read a Bible or Quran For an hour and just truly studied it , you might actually learn some deep , real wisdom ? because so much of the stuff in spiritual world , in the business world , is just watered down shit from that .

Anyway , the essence really comes all the way back there and to me I always thought why not just some guys just got some course based on what he learned from some other guy in some course , what he learned from some mentor , what he learned from Some book , and it all comes back to the same stuff . So why not just go to the source ?

right , and I look at it like that , like that is where the original deep wisdom is . I still struggle with a lot of it when People say things , certain things about Jesus being the only one , and I struggle with that , to be real , like it's not , like I don't question these things and I don't . I don't just blindly follow it .

I use my own disarmament and I take what actually resonates with it and that's the key thing . It's very easy to go . You are left , you are right , you are Muslim , you are this . Just realize why is that divisiveness pushed in the first place and what is the reason for that and does that actually serve you ? and you ask a couple questions .

It's obviously coming from , like the way you study . You know original textbooks , whether it's like the Bible , whether it's carana , whatever . You have that original top process which a lot of people don't have . If you're a product of the course or the tweets you're reading , all of your knowledge is based on the last year , five years . You know some degree .

You don't have any historical evidence or historical work . That's why I recommend reading like philosophy books or history books , getting to a lot of those details , closer details . That's gonna be figured out How history is repeated itself . History happens , how you agree , takes place , everything you know .

So all of his like understanding and knowledge of like His , like Maxi perspective all come back from history and crazy references like about how the first currency was like seashells and how the seashells broke down because The supply of people were going and knocking on wood and turning it , knocking on metal , turning into seashells , and all these small nuances of how

we've got to today And that perspective is all data back in the guys . Like when I spoke to him , it's kind of like you know someone so knowledgeable it's so difficult even ask the question because they've gone to such lower detail that it's very difficult to get to that point . Yeah , cuz it's taking them 35 years to get to this point .

If you can understand how human psychology and behavior works , then you configure basically anything out . If you really just sit down and try and focus on it And we've just got so much dopamine , so much distractions , is hard to even get to that point and to give it like the details on the practical stuff on here .

So like one of the biggest things I ever did and the best things ever did Was just get rid of all external influences for a period of time .

Delete all the socials , stop watching 50 guys on YouTube , maybe watch , maybe watch one who you actually agree with , and just remove all of the distractions because then original , that's where original thought comes from , that's where clarity comes from , that's where intuition comes from , that's like the real intelligence .

And it's funny because A couple I get a bunch of guys still the enemy to this day , because I was on the months channel for that , this success interview thing , right , and I remember he said where can people find you at the end and I said , nowhere , i'm not , i'm not , i'm not on socials , don't put my name in it .

I massively regret that now , because I didn't know how big he was going to get and that I'd be in the business of helping people . But Yeah , to that point , i had a couple years out of social media and that's what gave me the space to even Make a simple .

But they're not easy seven years man , and so this is why I say if you're a fat kid , don't keep the cookies in the cupboard , right , just get rid of it . Don't use discipline , don't rely on discipline and will power . It sounds good and catchy and flashy to say that just work harder , just as I and you do need to do that .

But why not just stack the cards in your favor , give yourself a bunch of aces , just get rid of all the shit that's stopping you from Doing what you need to do right , and so , yeah , just don't have that stuff downloaded on your phone , reset your own levels and then this kind of stuff , like actually studying history or you know these things are saying , become

easier .

So like I think when I was in Singapore , i had my phone always locked in the top top drawer , my kitchen , because I need to get a chair to get on to here to get it , because it's literally 12 foot high , right . So the small principles like that , and you know like all this bullshit is going on the news recently , but like Aliens are some shit .

I didn't see any of it at all for the last like three weeks because I don't I don't even know about that exactly . The only reason why I noticed ?

because my mate , dylan Madden , who was on my podcast , shared a reel of me and him and I clicked on his page and his most recent reel Was about that taking the piss and being like get back to work , go back to those clients . You shouldn't be looking at the news .

I thought that was very interesting because , like I have no access to external information , only thing I have is , obviously , my lead flow of my podcast guest that I researched . I'm going through that content . That's the only content that I'm following that I actively go seek out . Everything else is scheduled on my Twitter scheduled .

On my LinkedIn post schedule , on my Instagram poster scheduled , my podcast scheduled . I'm actually on the platforms , yes , and that's that's because I can focus on the work And it's very interesting . Like I want to get your thoughts on this too .

Like you've been living in Bali for about nine months now this stage , i've been in Asia for Both three years , i guess . In total , what would you say ? the main benefit is of being like completely extracted from London and being out here and just kind of focusing on the business .

I think one of the main reasons is who you surround yourself with this , who you become . Someone like this is just a magnet , but he's just a magnet for people who have that same mindset and want to connect and do things together . I was in London , which is arguably one of the best cities to be in , right for connecting with people .

Lots of people in it , millions of people But people weren't open in the same way . They didn't come here in the same way with that same mindset and intention . So , hands down , that's been the best things . It's been the people here because you can .

The amount of dinners I've just been at and sat next to some super successful guy or some famous dude who I just wouldn't have met otherwise and just had built a real connection with them Is I can't even count on many times that's happened right . So that's definitely mean one of the best things .

And just for me , i realized on that spiritual journey , i realized how important like environment was . Like when I talk about internal state , right , so it's my first time Internal internal state , right ? so it's made up of three core components thoughts , feelings and environment . Those are the three key things that affect your internal state .

what you thinking , what are you feeling , what environment you in ? right , these ? what effect your internal state is , what creates external reality ? right , that's the formula . And so Environment people are part of that . Physically , where are you ? like ?

you know , we were talking about surfing to get out in the water , like it clears you in a way and it refreshes you and it gives you new thoughts and rejuvenates you in a way that You just can't get when you're in an urban jungle . Time , right , so that's a real thing . And this , why do you think ?

You know , while climate change is being put in the news , all the millionaires and billionaires are buying more beachfront properties and ever , right , because they know that . So , yeah , but Barley has probably one of the top decisions , best decisions I've made .

You come here , i come here , we don't own it , nothing , nothing in particular like that . So like I'm happy to exchange ideas and I was like , oh yeah , like I'll help you with your podcast , you This , whatever , whatever , because you're coming for that more open perspective , which is really cool , which is that's what's very unique , you know .

And on the on the environment , right , so My podcast is always around twenty three to thirty year old guys , right , every single day I get a message from someone from Ireland being like don't know how you left the Irish mindset , ireland is so small , you pull you back down because it's way smaller than UK , like it's four million people or whatever it is , and

they're like I don't know how you do it , like I feel under so much pressure here . But my friends and my peers , i've also give up alcohol , so just passing a year without alcohol , and I have a lot of videos on that , and some of those videos . Some of the comments are really positive , some of them are really negative .

Some guys been like all get back drinking all this . Other comments are like I could never do that . My friends are pulling me down to the bar .

And what I always recommend is get yourself into the environment and even if you're building something or working a remote job , like a sales job known for your agency or whatever , you can be in Thailand , can be in a thirty dollar per night guest house acquiring that capital , giving yourself that oxygen , and then come off and do something you want and from it ,

you know , but it's , i find that So you've an American girlfriend , american girlfriend to me . That is so obvious now , but I feel the pain that people have That they can't leave that current environment and environment design is everything , it's literally everything . And I'm less preoccupied with , like , how my fucking laptop looks right in front of me .

I'm more preoccupied with where I am . Son of shining Jim's nearby . Food is good to generally good vibe , you know , does that make sense ? I never really got into like the fucking desk productivity I did that for I went through that phase I literally had .

And , what's funny , i finally got , i moved into this beautiful penthouse apartment in London during covid and it was like the dream apartment , right . I never fucking used any of it , dude , and I started actually working from a laptop , like like I do now . But I just want to say one thing about that point you said about drinking .

It's a big thing for me as well . I was drinking was one of those habits I couldn't seem to kick for a lot of years because my identity was in it . It was the way I would , you know , make friends . It was the way I let you get girls 100% , we can talk about that as well .

It was how I would essentially escape from doing what I was doing and not actually enjoying it . So this is like covid was the best thing because the best thing in the world I love it made it easy .

But what I'll say about the drinking is like it comes back to that point earlier , just for a new shit , like don't worry about doing new stuff , just remove the bad things , and naturally you will just like pulling back a slingshot .

Right , you just propelled forward from doing that and so , yes , it helps to be in a better environment , for that will be around people who don't do that . Yeah , and yes , we have peer pressure . If you have friends , you drink short .

But at a certain point , like When you particularly if you're running your own thing I just looked at it in terms of opportunity cost man , you're speaking , my fucking that was what did it .

So if I want to get super , even shredded I know that's very like a Egotistical goal , but but even if that's your goal right , or you want to travel or you want to build a business , you won't want to go out on a Friday or Saturday and if you do go , you'll kind of regret it so much that you won't do it again .

But the biggest issue for me again , when I was quite younger and I was like in these grad programs like waste , my fucking , my time , was that I wanted to go to the weekends . I'm escaping my reality . Number one And number two . Sure , as long as to do I don't have anything else I'm pushing towards .

I've already gone to the gym Monday to Friday Now let's see up to six o'clock in the morning , saturday and Sunday , and I was single at the time as well . And again , like , super , like you go driven dude that like to get girls or to be with girls , or to be in the right scene . You want to be that pretty boy as well at the same time . You know .

I've just done what my goal was right and so I would have . That's why I have these massive spikes Up and down and so , like now , like I am when I speak to guys because a lot , of , a lot of guys ask me about my relationship is they see things I do , my girlfriend , and they're like dude , how do you have the time to do that ?

doesn't take away from your business . X , y , z . I'm like no dude . This helps my business Literally . It's not that they don't believe me , they just don't understand how that's possible . I was like that dude . I used to be in the relationship where it would do . You know the government would want me to work .

She would drain my energy and it would take away from the business . When you're in the right relationship , where you're the right woman , if she's in her feminine and you're in your masculine , she's gonna naturally want you to propel when she's actually gonna feed you with energy to want to go and succeed .

She's gonna give you motivation to go and crush it more when you're at the right kind of girl and that motivation and that fuel is powerful man . And this is the point of like with a girlfriend .

I mean a lot of really successful dudes who are , who are crashing at a young age a lot more , i'd say , more often than not there In non monogamous relationships or that's what they want , and I was having , i've had a lot of interesting conversations about this . I see both sides .

I understand why they want that because they can , first and foremost right , they can do that because they've done the work to achieve that . But what I found was I sounds like we had a similar path and just like getting around a little bit .

Right , it's actually someone who's providing stability , who supports you , sees your vision , course on , who's beautiful , attractive , like this . We want that really important . Amazing sex yeah , of course , to me it's really important . But those are the values . Are we growing together ? do we have the same vision ? do we see this going this direction ?

those things are the bedrock of it , and having a shed mission doesn't necessarily mean you have to be doing the same thing . If you both have something you're working on , statistically it shows that those are relationships that work out the best because you're both growing together .

Part of relationships some of them ended with me because Not because it was toxic or some cheating on them is because we was growing in different directions , right ? yeah and sometimes that's harder because there's not something bad that's happened . You can't be angry , you can't say she did this , he did that .

But That path of growth , if you're in that pursuit of growth , it's just a natural and that's all relationship . It's just something you have to accept .

No , obviously I don't know the details of that , but a common thing that happens right is , let's say , high school jock gets with the cheerleader , the head of the cheerleader , cheerleader , captain , so good , beautiful , whatever , whatever .

When they leave high school and they go into the real world , high school jock becomes this beer fucking drinking loser who's just , you know , working in like some shitty job . There's nothing with his life , whatever . The cheerleader actually goes on to become a lawyer and she's a super ambitious lawyer . She has her own business , she's smashing it .

They've grown a such an imbalance That they broke , all grow resentful and that's when it all breaks down . So they can hang on to that because they're hanging on to the high school days , which is like torturous . I've seen so many people that I knew from a younger who are now breaking up white ones a loser And one is trying to become successful .

And to your point there about the young people who , like , make a lot of money . I think the running . One of the reasons why is because when you were younger .

When I was younger , you obviously want to get like the hottest girl possible and now , like Anyone to some degree can get like the only fans , like unbelievable looking girl , you just want to sit at the pool all day and whatever , whatever . So when you have that money to meet that demand that's what their demands are You can get with them .

So you can get with this beautiful girl of Eastern European girl Who's literally looks like an AI boss , and just give her , give her a Prada bag , right , and she's going to be happy . But you need to go back to the laptop to keep the lifestyle going and keep just a business going . At the very least . Forget about her , but the business going to very least .

And now she gets none of the attention . She's cheating in the background , she's up to weird shit in the background because you're not getting with someone who shares those core values , whereas like it sounds like quite similar to your girlfriend . But my girlfriend . I met her when I was About four years ago , three years ago , and we're building continuously .

I've helped her business , she's helped mine , we started the dog rescue together , so we're kind of on that shared mission now . When we moved into our house on Wednesday , which was a fucking melt , by the way , i was so busy . I was Tuesday . I was so busy because we loaded releases and we're on a very tight schedule with content releasing .

I had to go on to my laptop more 14 hours a day . She wanted to put away all the clothes and she was very happy to do that and she just took my suitcase . I didn't ask her , she just put away all my stuff and I was like really grateful for it and really appreciate it .

Now , in other relationships that could have all broken down , she's like well , you take care of your shit , you do this whatever you know .

So it was in that period where she identified that I needed like literal help , like I was fucking all over the place And at the same time , i need to keep the business moving and that's what makes it work together , you know you know one thing I found interesting about that I think what men actually want in a relationship is not actually that much .

Walk by all this , all this shit , right And the best that dude . I'm so pissed , right , because I was stuck . Do you know who Mike Chang is ? He was like the . So he was like the OG fitness guy who runs six-pack shortcuts . He was like the biggest guy on YouTube back in 2016 .

Hmm , okay , this might be not something a girl would want to read , right , because it's . Anyway , i was sitting down reading it and it a lot of . It's just , i would say it's more about like traditional masculinity , traditional relationships , almost all of which I agree with . It's just more fact than anything else and I thought , hmm , let's have some fun .

Maybe I'll just read out some chapters to her .

So one was about men having men being having a predest position to want to have multiple sexual partners . Right Now you can say is that right , is that wrong ? Sure , you can have that debate , but it just is what it is right . It just is what it is right . Multiple things like that , what a man's role is traditionally , what a woman's role is traditionally .

And I ended up putting on the camera And I was like this could make good content and I was just reading chapters to her and I was expecting her to get super triggered . Yeah , she agreed with everything , bro , but the reason why it's because I didn't just hide what I truly wanted and Hope she would just somehow change . That's very upfront with her .

I was like here's what I actually want in a relationship Like this is what I actually want . And I'm not saying I expect that of you . I'm just saying here's why I actually want right and As men like you have to be the leader in a relationship . Right , you have , because that's not their job to lead . Right , it's your job to lead .

And I'm saying this because in my relationship It's been so eye-opening to say if you're just honest and you're just transparent and clear Doesn't mean you have to see eye to eye on everything , but at least you can have that mutual respect and understanding for each other and more often than not you're gonna naturally fall into place And agree on the , on these

basic things . And it's to your point . It's not like , oh , your girlfriend's the woman , so she should put everything away . It's like it's like , no , you just like we're fucking busy crushing it and she wanted to help out , right and and she did that out of choice . Doesn't mean she's less than .

Doesn't mean She's this or you're , you're a misogynist for that , it's just like no . Yeah , I just wanted to help . She's wants help and I think The more you're naturally and you're masculine and the more she's naturally in her feminine , the more that just happens , right .

It's like when , if you have children , right , and If she's gonna be having the child and spending more time with the child , naturally those roles are probably gonna change over time as well and again It's just coming back to nature , what , what feels right internally , which again always just comes back to like knowing yourself , knowing your internal state .

And there's just so much bullshit programming out there , right , like yes , sex case , saying hi to Sarah at the office , like this shit happens now . So men , men have , men are terrified , women are , women are saying there are no strong masculine men out there .

Men are saying , well , if I'm like that fucking could go to jail , quite , literally right , so no wonder , no wonder we're here and I like that the tide is turning to some degree as well with this It's .

Right , and that's not to say that we shouldn't hire a woman , but it's about hiring the right person to the role .

And a lot of the data that comes back in there , some of it's fucking heavily skewed and fucked up in the first place , so companies not disclosing their information and that traditional like approach , people like have an issue with and and because when so fair that now Finally people like to it have been pulling it back and people are slowly seeing the light .

I think the best thing that could have happened is take it exposed in BBC forever . I was happening for the last couple weeks , because now you got into the point where , of course , happening him now is even ten times worse what happened a couple weeks ago .

But People are realizing that all of that stuff is bullshit And it's not men that are realizing it , also women .

And even when I speak , speaking with my girlfriend , like we went through some of , i went to all tates interviews And I would have them on in my apartment and she would largely agree with 98% of them and as would I , and it's obviously proportioned I wouldn't agree with , but that's not to say that I would agree with everything same or speaking .

I don't want you to agree with everything that I'm saying and I don't want to agree with everything you're saying , at least .

They're like , oh , i don't really agree with 100% tates says , or 100% of like what , what the masculinity kind of like movement is , i guess to some degree , and I was like , yeah , but you do not meant to , and I meant to look at a menu in a restaurant and want everything on it . You know what you want to pick and choose from there .

You know which I think is is a . It's slowly coming around . I feel like that it's gonna be people like yourself Who are positive influences would change that in a good way .

And I think , what the interesting thing is now to your point , it's it's women who actually make the difference now , because , because the men were already coming there , the men are now like , yeah , what the fuck up we've been doing for the last 10 years , right literally literally waking up , and now Women are starting to see it , and and that's really because

all the arguments Disintegrate when women are agreeing with it any attack you want to make on it , if women are agreeing with it , if the men are agreeing with it and the women agree with it , that's everyone .

So the guys you were mentioned You're hanging around here like 21 , 20 maybe . When they were coming out of school It was getting a little bit fucked up and now it's a younger people , then it's comes true , and those you just have to tell young people certain things and they will , by default , believe it . Maybe 12% , 15% , 20% believe it .

But over time that will Go into a new group and that new group was our believing it and it grows . That's how the first set of beliefs We're given we're given to us and over time it gets worse . You know , so it's it's , it's very important . Like and I'm not someone I'm , this is actually kind of a different opinion is that right now I don't want children ?

Okay , just personally , myself and Lisa spoken that we feel it , that our lives . We don't necessarily want to have children , but I'm worried for people who do have children . My brother does .

I put her as a newborn who is about six months old now to stage and I'm worried about How would she go to school and how school be perceived to her and how the world would look at that point . And there needs to be those kind of like borders , you know .

And He was asked what about kids ? and his number one warning was like you're gonna have kids , maybe wait a couple years .

And this and this is a guy I really respect and he was like I wouldn't be having kids in the next couple years because we just don't know How much things are gonna change , like things are gonna change faster than they ever have it over these next couple of years , right , and so for me it's like , well , i know I want to have kids , like I was on a yo ,

luke Belmore .

I think the family unit is what's been destroyed and I think bringing back a sense of that and that more traditionalism That's why I go to church , that's why I embody these different things Is that average , just all healthy traits that actually get you the life you want if you follow those things Doesn't mean you have to go have kids at young age .

Doesn't mean you have to say I am a Christian , i am a Muslim , but you can . You can use the essence of them right to live a good life . And I Forgot the point I was originally making , but it just is just interesting .

. He looked at my tattoo , right , and It's a very intricate tattoo here and there's a really small , you know the fingers touching like the renaissance , right , yeah , and he , just the dude , is like this is what it felt like , right , i'm like Windows Vista Meeting , like an M2 MacBook .

He's got a bigger one on his arm and he just starts like quoting Leonardo da Vinci for like five minutes at me And he's just like all of this and all of this stuff and Really interesting guy . I actually asked him to come on my podcast and he said yeah , and I was like okay , like how should we let Organize it ? he was like send me a DM on Instagram .

And I'm like dude , come on , we both know you're not gonna see that . And then he was like no , i will . And then it's never , never ended happening . But very one thing I'll say about that is There's probably a couple hundred entrepreneurs there and I've been to a lot of these different events before .

The general energy And I would say like frequency of the event was so high . People were genuinely there to provide value to each other , to help each other , to lift each other up . Luke was giving out Tangible business advice . You're doing this . Let me connect you with this person . Is that a product I could use . Have you thought about this specific thing ?

He was giving people such good , real advice and he attracted that kind of crowd and it was genuinely like Such a good vibration to be out . It was uplifting . So , so , so uplifting and Yeah , only good things to say about Yeah .

Yeah , i mean that's the way it should be like it's like he's done all that work And someone I definitely want to get on the podcast over Next couple years .

You know , he's like someone that you would fly somewhere like I met Justin water and I flew to Dubai to meet him And he's someone that I would definitely Would love to just do like a , you know , like a two-trier recession . Like someone that zones in a tattoo like that and goes into detail . That's someone you want to meet in person , you know .

You know what I mean That you're not building this capital so that you can fucking Just spend it on Lambo or look at , on a bank account . I'm gonna provide people around you . You want to be helpful . You don't want to blow your money on stupid shit . You need to get those core bases down and I'll tell you a story . You like this . So you fan of Justin ?

Yeah , he's a great guy . Yeah , you love this , right . So have you ever met his manager ? You're not familiar with his like circle ? no , no . So Richard them on on into on Gmail . Send him an email . He was a gap message . My manager , his manager . His name is Thomas . He's 21 years old . He's from somewhere in Eastern Europe originally .

We moved to , yeah , us , so he's like parents or immigrants and like super ambitious , a young dude , whatever , and he's . He was a manager for a fresh and fit manager for Tate And he just got into this group like 18 19 , and he's a fucking super sharp guy right And he runs their content team . The guys produce over a hundred clips a week .

A hundred hundred clips a week . Every clip does like a hundred K views . How are they not gonna be huge anyway ? Richard to him and I was like look , i want to do it in person . He's a grand , gonna be in Dubai . I was in Singapore and I was like a fly to meet you . It was grand , no problem . So that that was it .

I was the only conversation I had . I booked a studio Which is pod star , which is where they do all the big like Tate interviews and stuff , and I was like I'll see you at 2 o'clock on , like Tuesday and I was like I'm flying from Singapore , so like I hope you're there , you know , but I'm trying to be like really noisy .

I feel like don't cancel on me because of course you get so many meshes . You know you could have went to a bigger podcast , whatever . So anyway , that was it . I flooded Dubai and I'm obviously like super nervous for this interview And it's like a really big interview . I don't really get nervous , but I'm kind of apprehensive . That's it .

So I'm there at 1 pm , i check my watch . Nowhere to be seen , nothing , whatever . Whatever Half one comes , not no one around . And I was looking outside . I'm on the second floor , i'm looking to care workers . No care coming . It's fucking empty . And I'm like Christ man . I flew all here and he's not here .

22 , 10 to 2 , 5 to 2 , recording 2 o'clock and all like is here is like Steps , steps come up behind me and I looked over my shoulder and I see Justin walking down And he doesn't know what I look like Because we're talking on email . So I just see him and I walk up to him . I'm like , justin , like pleasure to meet you .

And he looked down at me like this He's six foot four and he was like an absolute pleasure to meet you . How is your day going ? How are you enjoying like today ? Is there anything I can help you with , whatever ? and I look up to him . I'm like , yeah , i'm doing really well . I'm like I'm the one that's interviewing you .

He was like , oh , you're the guy that came from Singapore . He's again nice to meet you . He's like , yeah , i'm inside , he's getting set up . So he didn't know who I was and he was a super respectful , super kind . He thought I was like a fucking fan and he was like yep , this is someone that you know Has given me their time by saying hi , how are you ?

and I want to reciprocate and he was super , super genuine And nothing but good things to say about him .

that , to me , is is the golden night to take away , because that is that if I'm someone listening to this , or even myself , is like okay , cool , that's a trait I want to actually go in and body more of super respectful And it was just .

And since then , like he's connected me with certain Cooper , he's had to me with loads of other guys which I've been very lucky to to meet some of them , virtually some of them person .

But , yeah , man , like just all of that group , they're super , super unique Because they help other people get to that stage and , like I'm not in the war room , i'm not in the real world , i don't do any of that .

They never asked me to do anything , never , never pitch and into me ever , and they just very , very helpful and , like you know , they hate the content . They want to grow their own stuff with it . They always reference your content , but it's like that genuine , like brotherhood of , like wanted to help someone , wanting to see someone do really well .

And he said to me because , like , he checked out my channel , which was quite small at the time , and he was like yeah , you know , you've like five thousand followers , whatever . He was like the common day where you will pass me , and he was like that's like what I'm looking for . I'm looking to bring someone like you up to pass me at some point .

And No , no one said stuff like that to me before . You know what did that do ? feel belief . It just made me realize that The people at the top didn't get there by pushing other people down . They got there by uplifting other people and working together .

You know , and I don't know you familiar with Dylan Madden , who is one of the professors in the real world and , like the guy Literally messes . So he's so fucking busy , like , so , so busy , is a huge team and he messes me on WhatsApp , being like My DMs are always open , like if you need clients , you come to me and I will help you do it .

Man , i record a one podcast with him and he's like I will do anything you need to get you more stuff . I'm like , no man , chill .

I'm like if you come out here during the summer with , chill out , go for food , relax , whatever , and Yeah , i don't know , it's like a different like , as you say , like energy , and , as you can see now , like I'm really like passionate about it , because At no point as those have those guys ever , ever asked me for anything , ever , but they've only helped me

the hell .

They're just there to help you , right , in any way they can . They're not there to keep hold of it , whatever little knowledge they have there to give . Just starting out , that's something you can do right now , right , but the way I've networked with some really cool people is just by looking at them and going Cool .

I could probably help them with this one thing . Let me just go and give them everything I know for free . Yeah , and just and truly come from no expectation as well . It's key , like if it feels like an exchange , you can do that . You can do that tip for tat , and it's fine .

But for me , i prefer just to give and really not need anything back , and maybe not ever get anything back , which is fine , because I know doing that at scale , i'm just gonna win over time anyway , and it's just what feels good and leads to a good quality of life , right .

But what I know is I don't know why you're taught on this there is that sometimes When people become super successful or super wealthy , they become a bit closed off and like of course they might not give you time because you don't have time , whatever . You know They're time poor to some degree , but they're kind of In those free exchanges .

They don't really want to be a part of it sometimes now . Now that's kind of hard to explain . But these people , it's as if they've come , it's as if they have nothing and they're just on your level , which are completely , not completely not .

You know , justin water was doing like 40 million a year And then he's talking to me about fucking Editing , fucking video files . You know what I mean .

He recognizes that , okay , yeah , he might be ahead of you , he's been on this journey for longer , but he can also learn something from you , right , and that's the key here . Like I and I chose to adopt that as well like all these guys I meet , i'm like I'm asking them question . I'm not just like they're trying to ask me stuff .

I'm like yeah , yeah , this , but what about you ? like I want to know about you , right , because , because It also how good does that make you feel ? right ? It makes you feel valued in that exchange by being able to give something to him , and he can genuinely learn something Right from those exchanges . So it's always , it's always a balance at the smartest .

Smartest people I've met are the quietest for most of the time because they're listening . That's how they got to that point , right , and then , when you're in a place to give , you just give , and so it . It works both ways .

. Actually funny enough , like I was in a sauna this morning , there's a guy I was speaking to and he was a speaking to cool people and like you know , launch like a Korean restaurant here . It was really cool , really different .

And he was kind of walking through like these different , like Variables of how he's building it , how he did some like competitor analysis , how he did all these benchmarking , other kind of food standards and everything here , and I was just like , fuck , like in the right place , right mind set people .

You know , that was like so strange and I was like , yeah , you know , i was like the me quality in Singapore is like not that good for these types of restaurants And he was like , oh , that's because of this .

And I was like , yeah , i don't need to know anything about food and the food restaurant business , but It's the way he thinks about things logically that I can learn from . Yes , 100% . So , man , i want to say a massive thank you . I don't know what time it is Fuck , it's 20 , 20 to 3 but I really appreciate this .

I feel like that we can do another session in the future , much more of a detailed one . I want to get into conscious entrepreneur as well at a certain time , you know . Yeah , hopefully enjoyed as well .