Day 12 - New Beginnings and Twelve Drummers

Join hosts Terry Cullums and Amanda Keeper each week , as they bring you topics and guests to help you improve your relationships , your health and your emotional and spiritual well-being .

I went out for my morning sunrise walk and it was 21 degrees While I was out . I remember that I haven't even mentioned to you that our lovely co-host is currently in Putacana , dominican Republic , probably walking on the beach . Maybe we can get her to post a picture on our Facebook group page .

So I have a question for you today have you ever gotten a tattoo ? Most of you probably don't know that I have a couple of them . Why would you ? But they are both in a spot that people would not normally see , and I've gotten some reactions from people in the past that don't really see me as someone who would get a tattoo .

I myself never thought I would get a tattoo until I was in my early 40s . I found myself in Kansas City , missouri , stopping at a convenience store to get one of those little mini bottles of wine for some liquid courage . Well , let's back up a step . I had been talking to Brian , my husband , about this for a little while .

He kind of planted the seed during some very funny text message conversations we had when we first started dating , and everyone that I mentioned to you said well , what's it going to be ? You know , your tattoo has to have meaning . It needs to mean something to you personally .

I thought I didn't know that as my mind was flashing to people I knew that had tattoos . I started asking people what is the significance of your tattoo ? What does it mean to you ? And it turns out this is a very interesting conversation to have and you could learn some things about a person you might not otherwise have ever known .

Anyway , I ended up getting a tattoo across the top of my back , between my shoulders , of the lotus flower , and the lotus flower represents new beginnings , and that is what we are talking about today . My friend , by the way , I am in no way recommending a tattoo , but I do love the idea of recognizing a new beginning with something significant .

For a while now , maybe since late fall , I've had this feeling and I struggled to put it into words , but I'm really going to give it a shot here .

For you today , this feeling is it feels like something is not quite right and I know this is so silly , but like , have you ever had an item of clothing in your closet that you really loved when you bought it ? But you've had it for a long time and you just kind of keep it in there because I don't know you loved it right ?

But now here , years later , when you go to pull it out of your closet and you put it on , it just doesn't feel right anymore . And for me , along with that feeling of still trying to wear this old , beloved item of clothing , I also feel a sense of restlessness that I can't quite put my finger on .

But I'm okay with this because this means I've grown in my own self-awareness and it means that I'm open and preparing for change . Now my husband will admit readily to you that he does not like change . He even notices if I move a piece of furniture or change the bedding , and I asked him why . And he said well , if it's not broke , why fix it ?

And my response was well , maybe it's not broke , but what if it could be better ? His resistance to change is polar opposite of my desire to continually look for ways to improve .

When we talk about the new design items for our new home build we're working on , he would gladly recreate the home we built back in 2014 because in his mind , it all worked together . Why reinvent the wheel ? But to me , those items worked at the time , but since then I've been exposed to new things and new design inspiration .

Do you know why a snake sheds its skin ? It's because , even though the snake continues to grow , its skin does not , so they shed their skin to create a new , roomier skin layer . It also helps them to remove parasites , but that's probably a different topic altogether .

Sometimes , before you are ready for a new beginning , you have to shed some things that are no longer working for you and , spoiler alert , that probably means change . When I tried to get Brian to go deeper on his resistance to change , he said why don't you figure out why you enjoy it so much ? And then my reasoning is probably completely opposite .

Touche darling , I did tell him . By the way , this conversation was on the record and probably would be discussed during today's episode . Okay , so let's talk about resistance to change , because understanding often leads to acceptance .

Resistance to change is very common and tends to become more pronounced as we age and it can stem from various psychological , emotional and even practical reasons . But I'm going to give you four common reasons why people resist change . Okay . Number one fear of the unknown . Change often introduces uncertainty and the unknown can be frightening for some people .

They may resist change because they're unsure of what the new situation will bring . Okay , number two loss of control . Change can make people feel like they are losing control over their circumstances , and the loss of autonomy can be uncomfortable and lead to resistance . Number three comfort with the familiar . People often find comfort and security in the familiar .

Change disrupts routines and the status quo , causing discomfort for those who prefer stability . Okay . Number four risk aversion . Change often involves a level of risk and some individuals are naturally risk averse . Fear of failure or negative consequences can lead to resistance .

We started this journey together by looking at the past year and reflecting on it , maybe even farther back for some of us . It is helpful to reflect on things , to acknowledge our behaviors and our responses to challenges , but we don't need to dwell on them . Those are in the past and we are in the now .

We've learned that gratitude helps us shift away from negative thoughts and helps us develop a positive mindset that allows us to appreciate the present . If you're like me and the Clear the Clutter episode resonated , you've already begun decluttering , or at least you acknowledge where this needs to happen . I started here in my office On day four .

We talked about health and really , if we don't have our health , it will be the thing that distracts us from everything else that we want . I was talking to a coworker this morning and heard that a woman he had worked with in Phoenix died six months after retirement , after working for the company for 40 years .

We can't control everything , but we can control within our power . We can control not just having years in our life , but life in our years . On day five , we talked about creating a vision .

Whether you choose the traditional vision board or some digital product like Pinch's latest or your phone , or simply taking the time to create a powerful daydream or mind movie , we need to take our vision and add the details , the sights , sounds and smells and the emotions that we can feel when we imagine ourselves there .

We talked about the power of connection and its impact on our sense of belonging , reducing loneliness , increasing feelings of joy and contentment , and how it helps with stress reduction , gives us opportunities for growth , enhances our mental health .

On day eight , we visited the topic of continued personal growth , and on day nine , we talked about the importance of celebrating our achievements . We talked about our tendencies as Gen X and even as women , to downplay some of our milestones and accomplishments .

And day 10 and 11 led us to more tangible topics like time management and SMART goals , to really help us get more intentional and granular , not only on setting the goals and intentions , but how we can weed out the time wasters to make room for the sparkling vision that we've created .

And so that brings us here to the conclusion of our series , and I hope , with some of the tools that you've learned , you will use them to move forward this year .

As I said in an earlier episode , I'm doing this right along with you , so I will take the next week to map out my goals and intentions , but I can already tell you that 2024 will look different for me and for this podcast .

If you've enjoyed this series and would like me to customize a coaching program to assist you , or maybe you're in leadership , like I was , and you're trying to plan some activities this year for your team and you'd like me to help with that . Please reach out to me at our podcast email , which is wwwthenumber2daypodcastcom .

You can also private message me on our Facebook page or Instagram account . Those things are all in the show notes . Thank you for being with me during this season . I really enjoyed this time with you . Remember to subscribe to our YouTube channel and support the podcast by sharing , liking and commenting on our content . That's all I have for you today .

We'll see you next week . Amanda , I don't know if this ever happens to you , but I sometimes will learn something really cool on a podcast , on a YouTube video , audio book , whatever . I think I'm gonna remember it and then I forget . Does that ever happen to you ?