Keeper Chat - podcast cover

Keeper Chat

Two zookeepers talk weird animals. Informative, irreverent, and sometimes funny. Learn about animals in a way you never have before, with all the dirty details from two people who aren't afraid to call animals out on their junk.
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Episodes

Quick & Dirty Ep: 32

You have more questions and we have more answers. A listener wants to know what happens when animals fight at the zoo? Do keepers intervene? Do we sit by the sidelines and let it happen? Is there anything we CAN do? Is there anything you can do? Tune in to find out. Also forgive us both for being on death's door in this episode. Getting old sucks, lol.

Nov 09, 202138 minEp. 168

160: Loggerhead Shrike

Let's all close our eyes and pretend it is still October. This was recorded in the spooky month so just live with it. Who is your favorite slasher? Freddy? Jason? The Loggerhead Shrike? If you ever wanted to impale a mouse than this is the guy to watch for tips. We chat about all things loggerhead shrike. What is a shrike? What does this have to do with Hannibal? Will you ever stop talking about Hannibal? Wait was this an ad for Hannibal all along? What do shrikes eat? What makes the hunting of ...

Nov 02, 202152 minEp. 167

Quick & Dirty Ep: 31

*HOT TAKE ALERT* Flora and Fauna want all keepers to have safe and fair working conditions and to be paid a livable wage. RADICAL. In this episode, we discuss salary transparency in job postings, red flags in job interviews, the fallacy of competitive passion and its role in exploitation, and how to set healthy boundaries at work that prioritize personal well-being. You can be professional and promote animal welfare without working yourself to death, babe

Oct 26, 202141 minEp. 166

159: Stargazer

Atone for your sins, lest you end up a face on the bottom of the ocean. This week we learn about the stargazer fish, a true NIGHTMARE MAN. We answer questions like what is an ambush predator? what adaptations does the stargazer have to camouflage itself in the ocean floor? Why is he electric AND capable of envenomating bystanders? WHAT CRIMES DID HE COMMIT (we never actually answer this one, it haunts us still).

Oct 19, 202143 minEp. 165

158: Leech

They want to suck your blood! And you should let them, maybe? We continue the spookiest time of year with basically just an episode about vampires. This was what was inside Edward Cullen all along. We chat about things like: Where can I find a leech? Why is Illinois the pits? Who even wrote the bible? Can a leech hurt me? How much black bile should I have in my body? Is Pliny the Elder really smart or really dumb? How does a leech stay attached to a body? How much blood do leeches drink and how ...

Oct 12, 20211 hr 3 minEp. 164

157: Spider tailed horned viper

Hang up the fall foliage, bust out the hot chocolate, and throw a pumpkin on your head idk it's spooky season! This week we talk about snakes AND spiders - two for one, baby! We answer questions like: what was Darwin THINKING when he went off the Viperidae template with this one? Were caudal lures the origins of fishing? What would you have on your booty if you were trying to lure in a snack? Have you seen the new Venom movie? lol

Oct 05, 202147 minEp. 163

156: Chinook Salmon

Everyone banded together to bring you...this salmon. A certified monster lover. Who doesn't love a shapeshifting fanged fish the size of a small man? We chat about: Where are Chinook salmon found? Why is their flesh pink? How do salmon know where to go to spawn? What is a salmon run like, and why is it horrific? Am I okay to eat salmon? If I had to choose to nut or die, what would I pick?

Sep 28, 20211 hr 5 minEp. 162

155: Dhole

Did you think we were done talking about fox-adjacent creatures? Think again! This week, we learn all about the dhole and answer some questions like are these things related to wolves and is there an aLpHa?? what is the most purchased item at Wal-Mart? how many teats does a female dhole have? could you push one over if you needed to? And why did Rudyard Kipling have such huge beef with these animals? Heads up, there is an unholy amount of background noise in this episode, stemming from Flora's c...

Sep 21, 202158 minEp. 161

154: Wattled Crane

Wee-woo wee-woo, the police are here, there is a carunkle alert issued for this episode. Please proceed with caution. We chat about things like: Who is booger anus? What that wattle do? Where are wattled cranes found and how many things are they the best at? What's a good plan to save the world, and why is it just the plot of Wall-E?

Sep 14, 202148 minEp. 160

153: Sperm whale

How have we never discussed this explicit whale. Anyways, call me Ishmael and let's get on with it. This week, we answer your questions about the sperm whale, such as why is it called a sperm whale? why do so many nautical terms have seemingly phallic/male (sus) connotations? what is spermaceti and is it related to spaghetti? what is a sperm whale's favorite food? and what the heck does My Hero Academia have anything to do with this?

Sep 07, 20211 hr 2 minEp. 159

152: Brazilian Treehopper

Is it high fashion? Or is it just helicopter blades on top of a cicada? Come learn about the Brazilian Treehopper who doesn't do much but look weird and suck sap. I guess there are worse things in life. Learn things like: Where is the Brazilian Treehopper found? Does it live or want to live in Antarctica? How many species of this thing is out there? Does the treehopper's crazy style have a purpose?

Aug 31, 202148 minEp. 158

Quick & Dirty Ep: 30

We answer a listener submitted question! Do we have any tips for working in weather!? Oh we do. We have experienced all weather events and seasons... and they all have their miserable moments. So what can you do to prepare yourself to be working in the weather that the weather-person says, don't go out in? Tune in to hear how to beat the heat and the cold, and how a trash bag is gonna be your best friend.

Aug 24, 202142 minEp. 157

151: Desert Rain Frog

You don't even know you know, but you know. Come learn more about the living squeaky toy who is always down to throw hands. This lil frog isn't just a regular frog, he is a dry boy. Come learn about things like: Where are desert rain frogs found? How does small boy get with such big lady? Do frogs who live in a desert need a tadpole stage? Who really is god's favorite?

Aug 17, 202135 minEp. 156

150: Wolf eel

Do you love tiny crevices, man lips, and crunchy foods? Well...then this guy is probably for you. This week we answer questions about the wolf eel, such as: is it an eel? Why do his teeth look like that? Does he have a rebellious teenage phase? How has the movie Ghost wormed its way into the wolf eel's life? What secret crimes has Sega committed? And what are some of Flora and Fauna's favorite 90s vibes?

Aug 10, 20211 hr 3 minEp. 155

149: Honey Badger

Remember back in the day when we found the simplest of youtube videos funny? Well, they aren't anymore because you're dead inside. Let's take a look at the honey badger, a viral sensation and a Lion Guard. We answer stuff like: Why shouldn't I put my entire name and life on a disney wikipedia page? Where are honey badgers found? What do honey badgers eat? Would they eat me?

Aug 03, 20211 hr 5 minEp. 154

148: Beaver

Think you're busier than a beaver? Think again. This week we answer questions like: why do beavers build dams? what's up with those orange teeth? why are they so pivotal to an ecosystem? what do they think about their neighbors? and why are people obsessed with their castoreum?

Jul 27, 20211 hr 8 minEp. 153

147: Addax

Time for your regularly scheduled dose of even toed ungulate. Let's chat about a dry kinda guy. And before you come @ us check out Sahara Conservation Fund if you're interested in helping these dudes out, Flora forgot to mention it in the episode.... But we do mention stuff like: Where are addax found? How many are left in the wild? How many are found in captivity? Is hunting weird or nah? Is it possible there is a weird curse put on the addax that is making them all die, or is it just humans? H...

Jul 20, 20211 hrEp. 152

Zoo Wrap up pt.2

Here is part 2 of 2 where we talk about our past zookeeping experiences. If you're new to the game, Flora and Fauna have roughly 19 years of zoo experience between them and recently left the field for other pursuits. These episodes will be a deep dive into our rationale behind leaving such a coveted career field, how we knew it was time to go, and what led us to that decision. BIG DISCLAIMER: we have wicked mad respect for all animal care professionals out there, in zoos and in other fields. We ...

Jul 13, 20211 hr 9 minEp. 151

Zoo Wrap Up pt. 1

Hey hey heyyy Grime Family! You've been asking for this one for a long time and we finally got around to it. This is part 1 of a 2 part episode wherein we talk all about our zookeeping experiences - the good, the bad, and the ugly. If you're new to the game, Flora and Fauna have roughly 19 years of zoo experience between them and recently left the field for other pursuits. These episodes will be a deep dive into our rationale behind leaving such a coveted career field, how we knew it was time to...

Jul 06, 202151 minEp. 150

146: Tiger Beetle

This episode is chaotic, but, when are they not. Flora's mom makes a brief appearance. But we mostly talk about a BUG. This one is weird, he gave up on flight, and became an Olympian, but he paid the price. So what's up with tiger beetles? How many subspecies of tiger beetle are they? Do they have mustaches? Do they have bones? How fast can the fastest tiger beetle run? Do we want to go to the past or the future? Is there a future? Listen now for the answers to all of these burning questions....

Jun 29, 202153 minEp. 149

145: Jaguar

Meet the only big cat native to the Americas! (Mountain lions, don't @ us, you're not included in this) This week learn all about the Jaguar and get answers to questions like: What is an obligate carnivore? How do jaguars hunt? What are the differences between Jaguars, Leopards, and Cheetahs? Are all cats just really big idiots? What is a melanistic color variant and how do black panthers fit into that? Why are jaguars SO BUILT?

Jun 22, 202158 minEp. 148

144: Hoatzin

KC coming at ya with a weird bird! I mean, all birds are kinda weird but this one takes the cake. Also maybe someone call Flora a doctor. She needs help. We chat about things like, What makes a hoatzin so weird? Where are they found? Do hoatzin share similarities with cows? Would we rather go flying or eat pizza? If there was a really bad horrific world ending event, what would we like it to be? How do you even say hoatzin? And more!

Jun 15, 202156 minEp. 147

143: Cicada

SCREEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!! Are you some of the blessed few who are experiencing Brood X right now? If so, we're jealous. This week we learn about the Cicada, a man of many talents. Ever wonder why cicadas spend most of their life underground? Or why when they emerge en masse they seem like a horror movie monster? What about their resonating chamber butts? Can they really cause hearing damage? Does their molt taste like popcorn? How do they use aposematism to protect themselves and why aren't you O...

Jun 08, 20211 hr 11 minEp. 146

Quick & Dirty Ep: 29

It's time for another Quick and Dirty! This time we get asked about a touchy subject. What do you do when your management/peers/coworkers hate the animals you work with? How can you convince them that they have the wrong attitude? What if your management sucks? Well, boy o boy, do we have the answer for you. Tune in to hear how best to tell everyone to sit and spin.

Jun 01, 202140 minEp. 145

142: Mudskipper

A little yucky man...what more could you want? He craves the best of both worlds and exists in all words. Say hello to Hannah Montana, the Last Airbender. This week we learn about mudskippers, an amphibious fish with an identity crisis. How does he thermoregulate? Are his eyeballs a headband and where can I get one? Why does he have secret bonus fins that make him look jacked? How does he regulate ammonia production and reduce the membrane permeability of his skin? Also who gave him the right?...

May 25, 202145 minEp. 144

141: Blue Whale

It's the biggest animal to have ever lived ever in the history of ever. That's insane. Tune in to learn more about this big wet thing! We chat about our love for Kristen Stewart, feeding poles, and the Apple Bottom Boys. The whale lives in the ocean, filter feeds, and moves kinda slow. How many school buses is a blue whale? What hunts blue whales? Are blue whales an endangered species? Can someone tell Kristen Stewart we said hi?

May 18, 20211 hr 7 minEp. 143

140: Lamprey

It's an eel! It's a noodle! No, it's actually a sinister cartilaginous tube, grow up. This week we answer your burning questions about the lamprey, including: what is up with this tube boy? Why are some lampreys parasitic carnivores and others peaceful angels? Are the dots on the sides of their face gill pores or very cool edgy facial piercings? How powerful is their suck? What is a buccal gland and how does it aid in their sin? (hint: it involves anticoagulant and disturbing imagery) Heads up, ...

May 11, 20211 hr 3 minEp. 142

139: Umbrellabird

Fair warning, this has absolutely zero interesting animal facts in it. Come learn about the consequences for your actions. We also chat about things like: Is there anything even interesting about the umbrellabird? Where are they found? When is Christmas John coming for me? Can I escape it?

May 04, 202147 minEp. 141

Quick & Dirty Ep: 28

Why ANYONE would come to us for advice on making a good first impression is baffling. But that's exactly what we discuss in this week's Quick and Dirty! We answer: how to make a good first impression at a new job and how to build relationships with new coworkers? We also talk more about prostates than you'd think.

Apr 27, 202131 minEp. 140

138: Marine Iguana

We are on a wet roll, keep them coming. This is basically a Godzilla episode, take that as you will. We answer burning questions like: Is Madagascar the Galapagos Islands? Are we fighting with Dad? What do marine iguanas eat? How does warm reptile boy go into cold water land? If we were in the Little Mermaid would we make the same choice as Ariel?

Apr 20, 20211 hr 6 minEp. 139
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