Keeper Chat - podcast cover

Keeper Chat

Two zookeepers talk weird animals. Informative, irreverent, and sometimes funny. Learn about animals in a way you never have before, with all the dirty details from two people who aren't afraid to call animals out on their junk.
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Episodes

113: Sea Horse

Seabiscuit! We chat about the equine of the sea. It isn't a sea or a horse, so what is it? Just take five seconds to look at a seahorse swim and tell me this is a real, normal, acceptable thing?!? They are cryptids. We answer things like: How fast can a seahorse swim? Do male seahorses *really* give birth? Are seahorses monogamous and what's up with their courtship? Can we relate this back to Danny Devito? What does the human brain have to do with all of this?

Sep 14, 20201 hr 10 minEp. 22

112: Snow leopard

Dreaming of cooler days and fluffy kitties - perfect time to learn about the snow leopard! This cold weather cutie is found in high elevations and high on our list of poofiest goofiest babes. We answer questions like: How on earth does this goofball keep from freezing to death? What would they order off the Skyline Chili menu? Are snow leopards considered big cats? How likely is it that a vampire named them? (hint: most definitely probably very likely) How good are Flora and Fauna at chuffing? A...

Sep 08, 20201 hr 2 minEp. 19

111: Shoebill

A big birb boy! A muppet with a ponytail! Join us in the lake behind Sesame Street and meet the Shoebill. Everyone says he is the scariest bird in the world, but that makes no sense and we are just mad about it. We talk things like: Where do shoebill live? Can a shoebill stick its spine out of it's throat? What do they eat? What's a super fun fact about shoebill? Is he a stork, a pelican, or something else? Are shoebill anymore evil than any other bird?

Sep 01, 202059 minEp. 18

110: Marine Flatworm

Who doesn't love a worm? Particular a very small, very wet, very fragile one? This week, we investigate a tiny ocean man and get all up in his business. Whip out those microscopes and take a peep at this paper-thin pal. Join us and learn answers to your burning questions, like: how'd he get so thin? What's up with his butt, or lack thereof? How is he different from nudibranchs and sea slugs? Why ON EARTH does he have two penises? And why is penis fencing now a part of my search history?...

Aug 25, 202050 minEp. 17

Keeper Chat Trailer

A quick and dirty trailer to play for friends and family to help spread the Grime Gospel!

Aug 22, 20201 minEp. 16

109: Dugong

Dugongidae is pretty fun to say so let's talk mermaids. This aquatic herbivore is very large and very different from manatees. Tune in to hear us put the Dugong song on blast because hey wow it had no correct information in it at all. Flora and Fauna talk about their secret tattoos and what their Kentucky Derby names would be. We answer stuff like: How well can a dugong kiss? Is a dugong related to dolphins? Aren't manatees the same thing? How much does a human brain weigh? How do you pronounce ...

Aug 18, 20201 hr 3 minEp. 15

Quick & Dirty Ep: 21

It's time for another Quick & Dirty, where we answer questions we receive from our listeners! This week, we set aside our general bitterness and take a stroll down memory lane to relive some of the more heartwarming, exciting, and flat out INSANE experiences from our zoo careers. Take an inside look into Flora & Fauna's pasts, and learn plenty of dumb tidbits about your two favorite zookeepers! We answer: - Any advice for new keepers? - What is your favorite zoo memory?...

Aug 11, 202056 minEp. 14

108: Tuatara

The beak headed baby godzilla that scooted its way into our hearts. He isn't a lizard!!! I'm not a monkey!!! Pay attention. This little man is going to blow your mind. We answer questions like: Wait, what, is the tuatara really not a lizard? Why is the tuatara the way that it is? Where can I find one? How many rows of teeth does he have. How many eyes does the tuatara have? What is going on with it's genitals. Is this finally about the illuminati? Why did it take so long to mention the illuminat...

Aug 04, 20201 hr 1 minEp. 13

107: Colobus monkey

This week we learn about the colobus monkey! This thumb-less monochromatic man had us asking questions like: why do they have a ruminant style digestive system? Is life harder without a thumb? Why are they considered holy in some parts of Africa? According to the colobus, what are the best ways to socialize with friends post-pandemic? And why do their babies look exactly like Voldemort? Join us to find out the answers to these questions, and more!

Jul 28, 202058 minEp. 12

106: Pink Fairy Armadillo

A little man! We asked for something ugly and you delivered. Come learn about the smallest armadillo. Do we like it or hate it? The jury is still out. We both have worked with dillos in past and it didn't go that well. Also, we chat about some cool news about Rat Raves, stick around to the end to hear what's up. We answer questions like: Hey, what's a pink fairy armadillo? Is it just Donald Trump's wig come to life? Is it able to be defeated? What does the fairy armadillo eat? Why is it pink? Wo...

Jul 21, 202056 minEp. 11

105: Scorpion fly

This bug man is neither a scorpion or a fly...so what's up with that name? We answer those questions that keep you up at night, such as: Excuse me...what is a genital bulb? What would you present as your nuptial gift? Is Jennie Maria Arms actually a Spiderman villain? What does the scorpion fly have in common with Hannibal Lecter? (Hint: it's a lot) How does he play in to forensic entomology? And what do we have to do to earn our girl scout badge for cryptids? We talk Flora's roller-skating tips...

Jul 14, 202054 minEp. 10

104: White Ibis

BIN CHICKEN time. This stupid thing. It's a white plague doctor looking bird. We chat about both the American White Ibis and the Australian White Ibis. We answer questions like: Why do Australian's gotta say weird stuff all the time? Were Flora and Fauna once conjoined twins? What's the difference between an Australian and American white ibis? Why do they call the ibis a bin chicken? Are they sinners or not?

Jul 07, 20201 hrEp. 9

103: Binturong

How can it be Binturong, when it feels so Binturight? This week we learn all about this popcorn-smelling boy and answer some of your burning questions, like: Was Jacob from Twilight actually a binturong all along? What is up with guts? Why do binturongs smell like popcorn and does this mean they love movies? and Can I actually just poop in my garden though? Both Flora and Fauna's cats make special appearances. Yay?

Jun 30, 20201 hr 4 minEp. 8

Quick & Dirty Ep: 20

Welcome to another Quick & Dirty, where we answer questions we receive from our listeners! We talk life after zookeeping, how to live your best glowing life among the hAtErZ, some promising job prospects, and we answer some OUTRAGEOUS Would You Rathers. There are plenty of background cat sounds, cat lovers rejoice! We answer: - What point should someone move on from zookeeping? And how to navigate short-term vs long-term workplace issues? - How to leave keeping when it's such a specialized j...

Jun 23, 202048 minEp. 7

102: Leopard Seal

Let's finally talk about something that exists in Antarctica. Great idea, but why did it have to be Satan's son? Flora has feelings about wet boys that eat tuxedo boys. We answer questions like: What is a pinniped? What's the difference between a seal and a sea lion? How many krillion krill are there in the ocean? Do seals do the worm or can they walk on their flippers? Does the leopard seal need conservation help? Or should we just leave it to it's own devices since it has chosen a life of abso...

Jun 16, 202058 minEp. 6

101: Sea Otter

Take a deep dive into the ocean this week and learn about the Sea Otter! You all have been BUGGING us to do them so we HOPE it was WORTH the WAIT. We answer your tantalizing questions like: Do they really hold hands when they sleep? Are they the fluffiest animal in existence? Why are the males insane? What ON EARTH is spraint? Why can't I have an armpit pocket? and Are sea otters basically the dogs of the ocean?

Jun 09, 20201 hr 4 minEp. 5

100: Centipede

What else were we supposed to do for the big 100?! Filled with fun information and a confirmation that Flora hates these very much. We answer your burning bug facts like: How many legs do centipedes actually have? If locked in a room with a Nintendo Switch, would we eat it? What is the love life of a centipede even like? Does gravity have an effect on centipedes? Tune in to find out.

Jun 02, 20201 hrEp. 4

99: Diamondback Rattlesnake

Sweet slamma jamma, check out this root tootin' man! We learn all about the Diamondback rattlesnake in this week's episode, and have the answers to all of your burning questions, like: What's the rattle made of and why do they have it? Who gave them permission to be SO GOOD at swimming? What that venom do? What should you do if you're bitten by a rattlesnake? Why should you avoid killing any rattlesnake you come across? and Is he just one big meat tube? This week we also have our first *lost epi...

May 26, 20201 hr 8 minEp. 3

98: Manta Ray

A big beautiful ocean boy! We chat about the biggest ray in the world and how absolutely cool it is. We also chat about Jigsaw and some kind of evil batman. We answer your burning questions like: How big is a manta ray? Are mantas self aware? How many species of manta ray are there? What would Flora do for $5? When is length not length, but width? Does tourism have an affect on manta ray populations?

May 19, 20201 hr 6 minEp. 2

97: Ducks

*Heads up, in this episode we discuss the sexual violence present within duck communities, so please listen with caution if this subject may be triggering for you. Discussion begins around the 36 minute mark and lasts until the 47 minute mark.* Duck the patriarchy! This week we take a stand with our waterfowl sisters and learn all about ducks (and a bit of their problematic nature). We answer questions like: Why do ducks waddle? Why should you avoid feeding them bread at the park? Why are their ...

May 12, 20201 hr 7 minEp. 1

96: Elephant pt. 2

Elephant continues with talk about intelligence, human/elephant conflict, and the entertainment industry. We answer questions like: Does an elephant recognize itself in a mirror? If I make an elephant do my math homework, will I pass? When was the term Jumbo coined? Did Edison electrocute an elephant? And, should elephants be in zoos?

May 05, 20201 hr 31 min

95: Elephant pt. 1

Get comfy, we chat about African and Asian elephants in part one of this mega episode. This part focuses on description, habitat, and general facts. We answer questions like: Do elephants cry? Do they want no scrub? How can you tell African and Asian elephants apart? How long are their genitals? Do they out bone us? Is there more goo inside a school bus or an elephant? What do elephants eat? Basically all the stuff that's been keeping you up at night!

Apr 28, 20201 hr 17 min

94: Bombardier beetle

Mixing chemicals? In his butt?? It's more likely than you'd think! Slap on your PPE and join us as we learn about the bombardier beetle, a certified chemistry ace, as he shows us how to one up our enemies and gain some major street credit. We answer burning questions like: Will a bombardier beetle eat a leaf if offered one? Are they master chemists? Do bombardier beetles prove creationism is real? Or is that the dumbest thing ever? Is shooting liquid acid fire out of your butt the coolest? (Yes)...

Apr 21, 202050 min

93: Pitohui

He looks like a little Halloween Oreo but he tastes like a spicy meatball. This is some kinda bird? We answer questions like: What's a bird wave? Is Poison by Bell Biv Devoe one of the greatest songs ever? What are Flora & Fauna's favorite cookies? Can I lick this bird? Does a pitohui get it's poison from it's diet or something else?

Apr 14, 202051 min

92: Coconut Crab

The moment you've all been waiting for - It's crab time. Learn about this LARGE boy who has been framed for some crimes and maybe needs to go to jail for others. He big, he molt, he crab. What more is there to say? We answer questions like: Are coconut crabs left or right handed? Where do we draw the line between robbing and grocery shopping? Did coconut crabs eat Amelia Earhart? Are spermatophores nature's gushers? Is eating a live bird the world's worst crime?

Apr 07, 202055 min

91: Surinam Toad

We are all frogs and only some of us are toads. But toads aren't really even a thing, it's just a frog. Anyway, anyone have Trypophopia because this is NOT made for you. Made for everyone but you, actually. We talk about things like: What is the difference between a frog and a toad? What do surinam toads eat? Have aliens visited Earth previously, and are they disguised as a toad? Why is it bad to fondle and molest amphibians? Why should you use vocal chords when you can rattle your hyoid bone in...

Mar 31, 20201 hr 1 min

90: Babirusa

Hope everyone is staying safe out there! What better way to take your mind off of the current state of things, than by learning about a big weird bald pig?? Join us as we argue at length over some weird teeth, discuss our zoo guest pet peeves, and identify gaps in Darwin's theory. Yee-haw

Mar 24, 202051 min

89: Arapaima

Everyone staying safe out there?? F&F are here to help you through the apocalypse! Join us as we learn about the arapaima, a BIG ol' fish who has the AUDACITY to breathe air. We try (and fail) to do math, chat Pokemon (what's new), and don't actually talk about this fish until 17 minutes in (yikes). This one's a real winner, folks.

Mar 17, 20201 hr 6 min

88: Gorilla

Big? Check. Strong? Check. Intimidating? CHECK. Scaredy cats? Ehhhh yes. This week we learn about the gorilla, the bodybuilder of the natural world. Think you can beat them in an arm wrestling competition? Think again, sucka.

Mar 10, 20201 hr 37 min

87: African Penguin

It's a long one. Flora has a lot to say about this wet idiot. Mainly that she hearts them.

Mar 03, 20201 hr 32 min
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