Mind Clutter

But then I realized, like, I'm just kind of filling myself with poison right now because I'm fearing what already happened or I have anxiety about it. Like, what is that helping me now or in the future? Nothing. It's just kind of wasting my time, really, where I could be focusing myself on whatever's at hand, you know? To be better, make it better. Yeah. Just don't focus on the past. Don't worry about the future. Just do you now. Welcome back to Keep It Good. I'm your host,

Emily. And I'm your host, Carly. So last week we talked about the never -ending game of keeping your house clean and facing the fact that you will never win that game. But there is an area that you can clean that you have a little bit more control over and that is your mind. So today's episode is all about cleansing your inner space. My mind is nuts. I have 5 ,000 things going on. and it could be really hard some days to kind of prioritize, but what do you do to kind of

help yourself? My morning routine is helpful. I kind of start the day off right, but I, for me, I would say exercise. And I do that, you know, I try to do that most mornings. So that's probably my biggest. Mind clearer, if you will. What about you? That's perfect. Me, like I said, I do yoga. I do journaling sometimes just to even jot my things down. But we wanted to kind of dive into a few things that could help you as moms, right, Emily? We're literally prioritizing

everybody else's life. So we are the calendar in the mind. It's just loaded and cluttered. So these are some things that really help you kind of regroup and move on to your clear path. I love that. Yeah. So yoga for me, yoga is so incredible, because not only are you like, you're giving yourself some time to kind of have no noise, like no, just nothing. It's your time. But I don't think a lot of people realize what

the benefits are to yoga. First off, I mean, you'll build flexibility and strength and who doesn't need that, right? But it can help with pain. It can help with your immune system, your cardiovascular health, like your circulation, all of that. It decreases stress and inflammation, which who loves inflammation? No one. But most importantly, it helps with anxiety. You do that breath work. You're kind of really getting into that mindful state of being and just focusing

on the present, the present mood. You know, just in general, but it will help increase your mood. It helps with your memory, your intention, your focus, sleep, and your digestion. So yeah, there's physical benefits to yoga, but mentally, oh, wow. It's just an incredible practice that I think more people should kind of get into. Well, I also think it's nice because it is something

that you can do at home. You don't have to be at a studio, which is incredible to also do it with other people because there's just a vibe in the room that you cannot emulate at home by yourself necessarily. I'm only practicing about once a week, but I do a long class and it is my time. And the kids know that. My husband knows that I am going downstairs and I am doing yoga. It's magic. It really is. Yeah, it is. And it, you know, you could put on Zen music, you can

do whatever you want. But the great thing about it is all you have to invest is a map, which you can find at TJ Maxx. You're using your body, you're using resistance, or, you know, stretching, flexibility, all these things. It's just incredible. Yeah, absolutely. And there's all different kinds of yoga, right? So even if it's for 10 minutes at night and you're doing a restorative practice or the apps that I have, there's all different kinds and all different time limits and you can

get out of it really what you want. Do you want it to be hard? Do you need to stretch? Yeah. It's really, it's quite incredible. There's even chair yoga for those who aren't flexible or can't do the certain moves. It's just stretching and being connected to your body on a different level. And it really does quiet your brain. It slows everything down. And the hardest part is just getting yourself to the mat. Once you're on the mat, you just lose yourself. And you're like,

oh my gosh, this feels so good. A lot of people, too, get very emotional when they do yoga, because I think their mind does get quiet. It doesn't have to be like you're crying because you're sad during yoga. It could be that. But I feel like it just unlocks so many things. And I know many people who have cried through their whole yoga session. It can release serotonin, endorphins, all these things that is just stored up in your

body. And now you just have this flood. these chemicals that are good chemicals for your body you know but they're just stuck so I mean that's that's just one of the things that if you've never tried it maybe maybe try some chair yoga first or just some slow flow restorative it's just there's there's no bad way to do yoga your practice is your practice exactly Exactly. So let's say that you tried yoga and it's just not your thing. You don't like it. Even just walking

is another awesome tool to clear your mind. Do you walk? Yes, I love to walk. I walk whenever I can, even if it's for 20 minutes. I have a wonderful neighborhood for that. So lucky for me, I don't have to go to a trail or anything necessarily, which I also do. But I'm really lucky and our neighborhood has a ton of walkers. It's actually like a joke because so many people walk. But yeah, I love it. How about you? I love

walking, just not in the winter. So that's where like my other little tools in my toolbox help out because yeah, it's got to be like a beautiful day. I'm not one of those like die hard. I see people running. Running? Never. I tried it. I hate it. And then like a few years go by, I try it. I hate it. And then a few years and I'm like, well, I'm turning 40. Maybe this is the year I'm going to love running. No, it's never the case. I'm not a runner. Yeah. No, I got it. Yeah.

But I see people running in the rain and I'm like, bravo. Like you are incredible. Yeah. Incredible. I could never have that self -discipline to be like out in the snow, freezing cold. Those people are like, they blow my mind. They're just incredible human beings. Not me. Think about it now, too. There's so many people who work from home. And I know people who have the walking desks. They have a small, it's not a full treadmill, but they stand and they walk while they're working

at their desk. Yeah. There's so many benefits to it. It's insane. Have you heard about the walking backwards? No. I don't know if I could do that. I know. But there's, I guess, some. evidence or whatever but of walking backwards can help you keep your knees like really strong and healthy. Oh. Because you're not putting the pressure of like going forward with your weight. You know when I was younger I used to walk up the hills backwards because it was like easier.

Me and my mom used to do these crazy hills to this twin pond and it was like seven hills right and it was just like never ending and so I would turn around and walk backwards and Yeah, that makes total sense now that you say that. I've actually never seen anybody do it and I have not done it, but I think it's interesting. Yeah, that's something cool to look into. I've never heard of that. But I do love walking. Oh, I love. I love walking. I mean - Or hike. You love hiking?

Hiking is my jam. Yeah. I mean, that's just a good old nature walk. Yeah. And you get so many benefits from - from being in the woods, like those negative ions that are emitting from the trees and just, you just, it's like a spiritual walk. Yeah, the sun. I just can't wait. Counting down the days until it's warm enough for my body to handle it. But yeah, back to walking. I mean, this is like such an easy little tool that you can use, but again, it increases the serotonin.

the dopamine, these are your feel -good hormones. It releases endorphins, which is a natural mood booster. It lowers stress, anxiety, increases blood flow to the brain, which will enhance your cognitive function and memory attention. If you feel like you're in like a writer's block or creativity is just stagnant, it boosts creativity and problem solving. It can help with depression, helps with sleep, just builds a ton of mental

resilience. And it's just a healthy outlet. I mean, no one's going to tell you that walking is bad. You know, I've not heard one. Unless you're clumsy and you trip on a stick, then that's on you. But I mean, that's just a very simple

way. And it does. It just kind of gets. gets your mind thinking onto other things, you know, and when you have less stress and anxiety, you have less of those panic thoughts, you know, that just adds to the clutter and unnecessary thinking that will just kind of cloud your judgment throughout the day. Yeah, I totally agree. Because you're taking, again, a little second for yourself, even if it's only 20 minutes, and you got to clear your brain a little bit so you can go on

with the rest of the day. Yeah, it's like multitasking. You're helping your brain, you're helping your body, you're helping your mood, helping your sleep later in the day. It's just like an all -around awesome little thing that we take for granted. What about meditation? Have you ever meditated? I have, and like I have a couple times through the years, but not where I feel like I have a practice of it. I have a really hard time shutting my mind off and doing it what I

consider well. I don't know if there's a right or wrong way to really do it, but I have the Peloton app and sometimes after a workout, they have five minute meditations even. And sometimes that's even hard for me to do. Like I cannot even shut my brain off for five minutes. But they kind of walk you through it. They direct you and tell you how to get into, hopefully, a meditative state. But yeah, it just depends. And I don't do it as often as I probably should.

I mean, I'm not an avid. I don't do it all the time. But when I do, I really do feel the benefit of it. You're just in a completely different

state of mind when you finish. some people are like well how do you just like sit in a room and not like think no you can there's apps there's you can go on youtube there's guided meditations i mean there's so many options out there but again this is just a simple tool you don't need to buy anything you don't need you can sit on your bed you can sit on the floor you can sit at your desk at work put on the the youtube of guided meditation on your lunch break and all

of a sudden like you just feel the stress just lift, you know, and you I mean, there's all different meditations, you can do a manifestation meditation where you're just like focusing on your goals and what you want. And it's just so cool. It's just so cool. And it's another thing that like people kind of overlook, I think, because you think of it as one specific thing, but it's not it could be any, any meditation that works for you. It's just like giving yourself a mantra.

which is important because I think mantras just kind of guide your life. You know, it gives you a positive thing to kind of work towards. And yeah, it's just cool. So if you've never done meditation, just look up the app and let them kind of talk you through it. It's just listening to the instructions and following what you're supposed to be doing. And all of a sudden you're done and you're like, I just did it. You'd be surprised at how easy it can be. I have done

it via app as well. uh, nighttime. So like to put yourself to sleep, basically. You know, like a, I don't know how long they are. I think they range from 15 to 30 minutes and they have you lay down, you know, lay down and be comfy and start breathing. They talk you through the breath work and then they start to kind of guide you through. Um, and I think that has been probably the closest I've ever had to a complete meditation. Because it has helped me fall asleep, but just

relax, mind and body. Yeah. Oh, absolutely. It's so cool. What about journaling? Do you ever journal? Journaling, I have for two days. I like it. Nothing ever became of that. Let's just say that. So no, I know that it can be really good, but no. Nope, not a journaler. How about you? See, I'm not the one where it's like, Oh my God, so today Steve got me, you know, like, I'm not like writing, you know, like we would if we were teenagers, right? Cause I think that's like a diary. Yeah.

A lot of people think that's what journaling is, you know, like dear diary today, I got my period and it really sucks. And no, that's not it. Journaling can be different and you can make it however you want. It's another. form of just its brain dumping, right? You're just writing what comes to mind. Doesn't have to be a short story. Yeah. It doesn't even have to make sense. Right. Like for me, if somebody opened my notebook, I'd be like, who the fuck is this girl? We need

to get her some help. Because she was just writing craziness. But it's all my ideas. Like my brain

doesn't stop thinking. And I just have like, million ideas for all these different projects and or just my to -do list, you know, like I Have to oh, I'll remind myself next Tuesday's parent -teacher conference or you know, like just anything whatever is in my brain at that moment I I just kind of throw it to the paper, you know So that it's out of my brain onto the paper and if I need to I can look at it and I can remember You know what needs to be done throughout

the week, but it's not I'm clearing out that space in my brain So that I have room for better things, you know, yeah, so it's not like necessarily a to -do list your But you put like your things to do Yeah, and make it just my whole life on this page, you know at times like I need to buy bananas I don't want to hold on to that thought

who cares like why am I gonna? hold up space in my brain for bananas when I could be just thinking of something so much cooler, you know, so it's, you just have to kind of think of it like, okay, oh, this thought came in, let me write it down. So then it's out of my brain and I have room for better things, you know? So you're not doing like a 20 minute, like, oh, every morning I spend 20 minutes. No, no, no, no. This is just like throughout the day, throughout the life.

Okay. you know you're just kind of like jotting things down as you go and it really helped me just kind of make space yeah and eliminate all that junk that's just hanging out it could just be something oil change next wednesday i don't care i know it needs to be done but i'm not going to hold it in my brain anymore you know i'm going to put on my paper so that i know it's there i'm not going to forget And it also, I mean, you could get into depth with it, and sometimes

I have, and I've released a lot of my emotions or my thoughts. It's helped me get to the deeper root of what I'm stressed about. And it can really, the coolest part about it is when you get it off your brain and onto the paper, it lowers your cortisol, and that's your stress hormone.

And we've been hearing a lot of things about, oh, you know cortisol belly or you know like menopause and cortisol and all the things but we don't realize that we hold so much of that with just our thoughts like our thoughts are the ones that are raising our cortisol levels more than anything so by just eliminating that you'll be surprised at how you feel afterwards you know by clearing that that mind space it increases your focus too you can now focus 100

% on whatever task you're trying to complete at that time. You're not trying to multitask all the time, if that makes sense. Maybe I'll start adding that to my morning routine. I think you do need to because I always hear you say like, oh, I forgot to do that, or I had an idea, but I totally forgot. And I'm like, well, you need to write it down. Those of you that know me, this is very true. I have all good intentions. I'm going to buy you a journal. Yeah, I'm going

to need a new journal, for sure. It's so funny, though, because even my oldest, she you know they like they like books they like to draw and like write stuff down especially my older one because she's learning how to you know read and write and all that good stuff and i have found a couple of her little journals like she writes stuff down like a diary already and it's just like it's so weird that that's the instinct i've never told her to like write down her thoughts

or anything it's so funny and i remember doing that as a kid too you know like dear diary i mean that's not what she's saying but it's funny how I'm seeing that even she's doing it. So I should take after my eight -year -old. I should really start doing that. It's amazing what we learned from our kids. They're like just totally innocent and know how to do certain things that we like overthink, you know, constantly overthinking things. That's a big one right there too, overthinking.

Like, okay, so... This brings me to the point of the past, present, future, right? What is the majority of your thoughts that you think about? Is it the past, present, or future? Wow, I've never actually thought about that. I guess future. Well, let me tell you something, okay? The past already happened. There's no amount of thinking that is gonna change whatever happened, right? You can't go back in time. Even if you think of the situation differently, it's not

gonna happen. it already has been done. So let that fear or anxiety or anything else go. There's nothing you can do to change it. Live with it, own it, move forward, right? Yeah. Your future has not happened yet. You're not a fortune teller. You can't make things happen unless you're practicing like manifestation. You can kind of like know that it's coming, but Once you put it out there, you just kind of have to forget about it and know that it's happening You can't overthink

it. You can't second -guess it. So Stop thinking about the past stop thinking about the future and just be in the moment because before you know it The future is here and you fucked up the present that you were just at because you weren't appreciating it, you know so don't that's I've been trying very very hard to be mindful and and just live in the present moment. Yeah, be in the moment. That's solid advice, for sure. It took me a long time to get to that point.

I was more worried about the past. Like, I shouldn't have done this or did that. But then I realized, like, I'm just kind of filling myself with poison right now because I'm fearing what already happened or I have anxiety about it. Like, what is that helping me? now or in the future, nothing. It's just kind of wasting my time, really, where I could be focusing myself on whatever's at hand, you know? To be better, make it better. Yeah. It's just, yeah, don't focus on the past. Don't

worry about the future. Just do you now. Yeah. I always, people make fun of me because I never take pictures. I love pictures. I'm the worst. I've always said, well, it's because I'm not thinking about that. I'm present in the party we're at or the holiday or whatever. But then after, I'm like, oh, darn it, you didn't take any pictures. I do sometimes. So I like to think that I'm kind of present. But I think my mind is more looking to what's next. And that's probably

common because we're just busy. Humans are busy. Oh, absolutely. Yeah. So yeah, we're always looking towards what what do we have to finish? We all have work to do to keep our mind clean. And this is these are great tools. Yeah, it's just hopefully people are less stressed, you know, because I just I look around and everyone's fucking stressing out. Everyone's got a million things on their

plate. But like, nobody takes the time to. to take care of themselves you know you have to kind of put yourself first sometimes invest in yourself well and they can be quick too like even that's like oh i'm thinking about the future okay nope take it in what i'm doing right now instead you know yeah that takes two seconds to turn it around yeah it makes me kind of sad sometimes because i take a lot of pictures i'm i'm like the polar opposite of you i i probably

should put the camera down and not take so many, but I do. But then I look back at my kids and I'm like, ah, it feels like yesterday. And they were just in their little jammies and all snuggly with their binkies. And those were the times when I was so focused on either the past or the future. I didn't really enjoy that moment. And now I regret it. As a mom, you're just like, ah, it's time for bed. But one day, it's going to be the last night that they ask for snuggles.

or it's gonna be the last night that you get to tuck them in and read to them and those days are coming up because you know they're gonna be like in the double digits soon and i'm like just oh my god yes snuggle with me until your whatever age you know it's probably be weird when they're 18 and i'm like do you want snuggles you know so i'll take it i will live in the moment for that those five minutes and just soak it in soak it in I don't care that the dishes need

to be changed or whatever. No, I'm soaking it in and I'm taking that moment and I'm being present. I love that. What about grounding? I love grounding. Me too. I love it. Same, same, same. Don't talk dirty to me, Emily. Sorry. I love it. No, I like, I don't know. I think we both kind of learned about grounding around the same time, like really the benefits of it. But then you sent me the documentary and we watched it and we were like, okay, this is like far beyond what we thought

grounding was. You know what I mean? Yeah. Oh, beyond. I mean, I always felt a special feeling being in my garden, being in the dirt. Yep. you just feel different. And I never could put my finger on it. I just never, I always felt great after yard work or like being at the beach. Who doesn't feel good when they're at the beach? I know. If you tell me you don't feel good being at the beach, then you're just a negative Nancy and we should not be hanging out. Right. We are

not friends. Yeah. We are not friends. Oh my God. Like, well, first of all, if you haven't heard of the earthing movie, It's a documentary. I believe it's free on Amazon Prime if you have that. Yeah. Yeah, that's where we watched it I don't know if it's still on there, but just Google search it. It'll come up Yeah. Yeah, just look it up. It's called the earthing movie You'll

see a pair of bare feet in grass. If you see that that's the one it's phenomenal and it made me realize that feeling that I was having at the beach or in my garden and It's so freaking cool. So listen to this. The earth is negatively charged, right? It just has this like natural negative electrical charge. And our body can kind of build up this positive static electric charge throughout the day without even realizing it. Because if you think about it back in the

day, people would walk around barefoot. There were no shoes. there wasn't anything. So everyone was naturally connected to the earth on a daily basis without even trying. And they were just in this awesome state. So along came the shoes. Now we are disconnected from the earth. We hardly ever walk around barefoot or anything like that. But when you do, they say you should do it for about 30 minutes or more to get the real benefits, right? But when you do this, You're neutralizing

free radicals in your body. So free radicals are like crazy molecules that are just like super unstable They cause destruction to your healthy cells and that in turn turns to inflammation disease all these things so when you're you're basically absorbing the negative electrical charge from the earth and you're absorbing these electrons and You're just kind of neutralizing what's going on in your body as you absorb this So your sleep gets better your well -being gets better. Your

pain goes down Circulation gets better. Your healing is quicker your calmer which leads to less stress and Some people say that they feel energized after you know, it just fuels you with this awesome Energy so you're probably saying like oh 30 minutes of plus like is there such a thing is too much No, there is no such thing as too much like the more you do it the better you feel it's addicting cuz now like Like I said in the the last one. We're never inside in the

summer. We are constantly outside My nails are never pretty in the summer because I'm like I'm just in the dirt. Like I love it I want to feel it touch it smell it I'd eat it if I could But yeah, I mean, I love, I love it. It just, it just makes me so like, it's like a drug. Yeah. It just makes me feel so good. But yeah, we're just never inside. We're always outside and I got my kids doing it. And like I said, my son

has ADHD. So when we watch the grounding movie, it talks about, um, in the, in the winter, right? We live in an area where we get a lot of snow. It'd be stupid to walk outside. We are not going outside and grounding at all. for months, honestly, months and months. Yeah. So we all, and I know your family went all in too, we got the grounding mattress covers, right? We did it for my sons,

for us, and it's so cool. I mean, the only thing you have to watch out is during a thunderstorm, you should probably unplug it, but otherwise... Good advice, solid advice. Yeah, solid. Read that warning label. But otherwise, like it's such a cool feeling. I'll go to bed and I feel, I don't know about you, but I feel like tingling in my legs when I'm like laying down. We just replaced it because we've had it for like two years. Yeah. That's interesting. We're probably

about that too then. Maybe we should get a new one too. Yeah. I mean, I felt something the first night. Again, placebo effect, whatever. I felt glorious. So I was feeling it. Yeah, and we had gotten it because first of all, my son, when it talked about ADHD, I was like, oh, sign me up. Another natural thing. Yes, all for it. But my husband also was in a really bad car accident, and he really screwed up his back. And he's had back pain ever since. And we've tried all the

things. We've just tried it all. And so we were like, you know what? Why not? Let's try it. His back is so much better. I mean, it lowers inflammation. It does all the things that I said. I mean, I don't think anything is as beneficial as the real deal. Yeah. But for us who, yeah, who can't be outside for eight months or seven months a year to put our feet, it's way too cold. Yeah. Are there snow? Yeah. I'm not doing it. I don't even like to walk in the cold, let alone take

off my shoes. Yeah, right. Never. But yeah, it's just so cool. And it works so much that... We put it in his 504 at school my son. We actually don't need it anymore We just took it out this past year, but we would have him go to the grounding mat at the nurse and Sit there for 10 minutes and just kind of re -stabilize himself, but that

was after recess too, right? Yeah, so like after some energy was let out Yeah, okay So it was it was just so cool and the principal and the teachers were all like what what are you talking about? You know? And I'm like, Oh my God, like everyone needs to know about this. Everyone needs to know about grounding because it's just nature's medicine. Yeah. Well, and I think it's neat that there's these options for us who, whether you can't get outdoors or you live in a cold area

like we do, but they make sheets. There's grounding sheets. So if you don't want to put the mat, the mattress pad on there, I've never done the sheets. You guys did, didn't you? We have the sheets for our bed and then we use the pad for the boys, but they also make like pads that you could just, while you're at work. Right. Sitting, just put your feet on. Typing. Yeah. You just take your shoes off, put them on this mat and wow. I mean, it's just so cool. It is so cool.

So yeah, grounding is like, I mean, if you only practice one thing out of this little box of tools, do... the grounding. You won't regret it. I don't know if we've said this yet, but it has to be grass, woods, sand, dirt, because I love to be barefoot, especially when it's warm out. And I was like, oh my god, I'm just grounding all the time. This is so crazy. I love to be barefoot. And then I was like, oh, not on my

patio, not on my driveway. Well, they say sometimes you can be on concrete, but it shouldn't be treated with a chemical or painted. Then it won't really fit you. You're going to get the full experience if your feet are actually on the ground. On the sand, on the grass, even if you're just swimming in a body of water and not a pool. Right. The ocean, pond, lake. Yeah. And it does. It feels so good. You do. And if you know this now, The experience is 10 times better. Yeah, you're going

to have a phenomenal summer. But one thing I did start doing with my kids, I forgot to say this when we were talking about journaling, is in the morning right before school, usually we have a little lag time, right? And I would let them like watch, you know, something on TV, whatever. I noticed that this would kind of hype up their energy in the worst possible way. It wasn't doing

anything to kind of help them set up. Positive day for themselves and it led to a lot of fighting a lot of like I don't want to watch this You're gonna watch, you know, and it was just like enough.

Oh my god So the last 10 minutes before we leave for school We started doing this little journaling prompt which already is making a big difference I think so I have them write how they want their day to go Ways that you can make this happen, you know, like so they'll list like three things that they can do that day To make this goal happen today Then they write any fears or concerns that they have for the day You know, I'm nervous about this or whatever and we kind of talk about it

and then we find a solution Then I have them write five things that they like about themselves, you know, I'm smart. I'm fast. I'm whatever five things that they're grateful for and Then three things that they can kind of work on for that day, you know, like share more or Raise your hand more like whatever it is. I mean little kids come up with the funniest things right like

Today my son made a made a mission. He Wrote down his goal And then I just got a picture from my friend that he just won a little possum award at school. And I was like, oh my God, like this is so exciting. I can't wait to praise him when he gets home because he stuck to the plan. And I just think like, not even for kids, I'm going to start doing this with myself too, because I think it's great to kind of set yourself up with a goal. Identify the ways that you can get

that goal. Think of things you like about yourself. Stop picking yourself apart. And like I said, I always talk about what I'm grateful for first thing in the morning, but it's just a good reminder too. Right. Well, and for them, they're clearing out their mind now, you know, of maybe some junk before their day starts. Yeah. And I tell you the transition from that to going out the door to getting to school, it was so much better. I mean, usually we have a lot of issues like

in that short timeframe. Yeah. But it was, it was a nice little change, even once a week, you know, like, what is your goal for this week? What are you going to do to accomplish it? Set yourself up for success. I love it. That's fantastic. Hopefully you guys can try some of these and just kind of clear that mind. Yep. And remember, stop thinking about the past. Stop thinking about the future. Focus on today. Absolutely. So you have a little quote for us. I sure do. A cluttered

mind will never lead you to a clear path. and that is by Christina Scalise. I love that. You want a clear path? Get rid of that clutter. Hope you guys have a great week. As always, keep it good.