Just B Rant: So it's Heidi Klum's Halloween Party (And Bethenny's Birthday)

So I went with my friend Dan and I was wonder Woman. And I love the costume I chose because for me, it was comfortable. It wasn't unwieldy, it wasn't a ton of makeup. I feel like wonder Woman lately, and I feel like I stuck the landing. I did original wonder Woman, seventies wonder Woman, Linda Carter wonder Woman, you know, original makeup, original costume, had it made, took it seriously, did it within a week and a half. Two weeks though. It was like a cram, but I

didn't really think about it. It wasn't dramatic. I'm not one who wants to do seventy five fittings and stress out about something. I just think the things you think of kind of towards the last minute and just pull it together.

Always work best, and I do it all myself. Like the makeup, I had a makeup artist do it, but I really directed how I wanted it to be done exactly, and even like right when it was done and the people around me thought it looked good, I was like, no, we need to pop this, We need to pop that, we need to do this, we need to do that. So I'm getting more and more involved. And I always dress myself. I never borrow clothing. I only like to buy or be given. I just I like. I like

styling myself. It's become this sort of creative thing that you try to figure out for the event, what makes sense in your life in the moment, like what it means, and I don't rush, Like I will have an outfit with tags on it in my closet or a dress for years, I buy it on sale, it's sitting in my closet and then the moment arrives where it's perfect.

And if you force something for the wrong event, it's not perfect, So you got to kind of just trust the process and so many different types of things you get invited to dictate what you'll wear. I just went to a Madman themed wedding, you know, Like I went to the US Open and wore this cute, like denim flirty skirt that I've been wanting to wear for long, like maybe two years. I just like sort of deciding based on that year, that experience, and who you're going

to see, what you're going to do. So I love Halloween, but I only love it when you're doing it right, meaning like the half asked when you go trick or treating with your kids and just stick on the skeleton suit or the witch hat. Like I have all that, and that's fine for the neighborhood, but I always feel

kind of like, make make an effort. I have a massive Halloween box, so I have a big plastic storage bin that all costumes are separated by zip block bags, and then I have wigs separated by zip block bags, accessories, jewelries separated, shoes separated, and I just edited it today thinking that it was already organized because I've organized it, but now I went through every single costume taking it out of its bag. Looking at it, does it look cheap?

Is the wig grows? Is it too ratty? And I just threw out one giant, entire bin of old Halloween stuff. It felt so good. So I also like to purge holiday stuff, not just like normal clothes. I'm constantly refreshing and purging and organizing, and today was a day that I did that for Halloween and it felt so good. It's just nice to go back and like, no, you have all good things. Or if your kids coming over with their friends, like you have a costume for them.

I don't know. I like being that mom that my daughter comes over with her friend and looks through the costume bin and chooses something. So that was a big task today. But back to the party. So it's Heidi

Klum's party. She came with her life partner. I don't know if they're actually married, but as like Et, like aliens like Et and missus Et, and it was so amazing and the eyes were real and like she goes all the way in, like she goes eyeballs deep in the costume and that's a commitment and she really really

owns Halloween. And her party is iconic and it's a brand, and it's every year, and this year it was at the hard Rock Hotel in New York City, which was like New York Times Square, and I didn't know there was a hard Rock hotel in New York City. And all I could tell you is this venue was amazing. It wasn't gigantic. It was a reasonably sized venue that had like velvet booths, banquettes, and it felt special. It felt adult. It didn't feel cheesy. It didn't feel like

young kids doing drugs, didn't feel like too celebrity. There were celebrities, but it wasn't like a powerhouse a list with security group. It was like, you know, it was like me and Mario Canton and Nicole Scherzinger, like a kid from outer Banks, like what's his name? Stokes? Is it Chase Stokes? Like great celebrities, but it just was eclectic. And Heidi Klum is obviously a big celebrity, but it

just wasn't giving diva. It was giving like people that came and wanted to have fun, but not out of control. Sometimes Halloween can be a little scary, like it gets a little freaky and everyone's wearing costumes and you feel a little dark, and you just feel like it just gets overwhelming. It's too crowded. You drink, you feel like you can't breathe, like you're suffocating your costume. Someone's on top of you, poking you with an angel wing. It wasn't like that. I call it alchemy. There was an

alchemy that was great in the room. The DJ was a ten, the venue was a ten, the energy was a ten. I was just hanging out with Randos. I had a really great booth. I had like the best booth in the place besides Tidi Klum like. I had a corner but mac Daddy like, I'm Madonna. Booth like. It was legit, and you know, they gave us beautiful cocktails. But as someone who had been given this ball or booth like, I participated in the party. If that makes any sense. I posted on social media. I tagged Heidi.

I invited other people over to my booth. Mario Cantone, who is the guy from Sex and City, the funny you know, gay guy who's Charlotte's best friend, who's in and just like that, I invited him over with his husband of thirty four years and they ended up hanging out like I felt like I was being hospitable, if that makes any sense. Jonathan Cheban came and I haven't seen him for years. He said we should do a food video. I invited him to sit with me. Like it was a nice experience. I really it was a

really nice experience. And it was very like I said, adult DJ was amazing, the dancing was amazing, but you just didn't feel like a fucking hot mess at one o'clock in the morning. But you just felt like, Okay, the music's changing and it's time, and it's I am a person that knows when to leave a party. Like you just kind of it gets repeent, like you're on

a loop. You've done it, You've danced to it, it's been amazing, You've talked to people, you went to the dance floor, you came back, you had a drink, you had another drink, you took pictures, you did video whatever, you hung with your friends, you had good conversations, and then like it starts all over again. You're like, Okay, we're on a loop. Like we did it. Let's leave a party at its peak. Let's leave a party at its peak. So I am grateful to have been invited

I would definitely go next year. I just think it. She personifies Halloween, and I think that, like everything else, every year, people perfect their stuffing recipe, their Thanksgiving, their birthday party. Every year, she's perfected this party. I've been before, and I feel like I think it was Bronson van Wick who planned it. There's no food there. They had butter fingers on the table. Who's a sponsor? Good alcohol per No Recard was the sponsor, and like that's all

you needed. We had cocktails, we had good music. It started at nine. Also, also I got there, I have to say, like nine to twenty five. I knew it was at nine. We're sort of like Losory. We're gonna be on the front end of people getting there, you know what. Good for us because I don't want to get there at ten thirty in jockey for position. We got there early. We got a great table. I tipped the people that helped us at our table because I

think that's important. And like pigs get fat and hogs get slaughtered, I don't need to roll in there at ten fifteen, waiting at home for what I'm gonna do and looking to like look cool when I get there. None of that was important to me. It's important to me is good real estate. So even if I wasn't graciously given a beautiful table, I could have found a corner and found a chair and made my own real estate. I'll always figure it out. I'm that bitch. So we

got there early, early bird gets the booth. I was happy. It was wonderful. Halloween went off without a hitch. Everybody thought it looked exactly like Linda Carter, like I overshot the mark. I just wanted to look good. I had an original seventies costume, like it was a replica. Thank you Garro and his beautiful assistant, Like, I overshot the mark because I took the wig and the detail in the makeup so seriously. So I'm feeling myself. I was

feeling myself. It was great. But people are like, oh my god, you actually are a wonder woman, Like this is not a costume and you are Linda Carter. People were messaging me that they showed their daughters like the original and me and like, oh my god, it's the same person. So that was amazing. And when you stick, I've had expensive costumes that haven't landed. I had someone do a costume for me that was like supposed to be Barbie, and I ended up looking like Anna Nicole

Smith like back in that day. And I've had supposed to be sharing. It doesn't land, and it sucks when it doesn't land because someone has to do the makeup perfectly. It all has to come together. Don't go. If you go, go or stay home, like do it or don't. Don't try to accomplish something you can't get done. Don't bite off more than you could chew. Do something cute and creative and be simple because often the best costumes are simple.

But don't like go in it's like too hard a recipe, and then you can't do it, and then you get in the middle and you suck. I've sucked my Hello Kitty sucked, my Share sucked, My Barbie sucked. My Marilyn Monroe crushed eight. I would say this is my Marilyn Monroe are the two best of my entire life. So that was good. So I already know what I'm gonna be next year. You're welcome. Great time had by all. Thank you so much, Heidi and crew. Let's talk about birthdays. Okay,

it is my birthday, it is my mother's birthday. My mother passed away. I was born on her twentieth birthday. That has always been triggering for me. It has always been a weird day. I got sick every year of my life on my birthday. I would throw up or come down with something. I would be locked in my room. I couldn't get out. I was a disaster my whole year. On my birthday, I had a nervous breakdown on television when I there was a surprise party for my birthday.

I don't do well. I'm off to a good start. It's a ready lunchtime and I'm off to a decent start. I have been getting better, and I think my mother passing away has helped me to release something. Knowing that she existed on this earth and that I was born on her twentieth birthday on a cellular level affected me.

Knowing that we didn't have a relationship, We didn't speak, but she was like there and it was her birthday and she alone, and what's it like and I and somehow going back to my childhood and thinking about all my birthdays and what it must have been like to have me on her twentieth birthday, and hearing that she never wanted to have me for my stepfather any chance he's gotten to tell me. It just is a triggering day.

And I am so narcissistic about it because like I don't want it, but then if I don't get it, I feel left out, Like I don't want a big deal to be made, but I want a deal to be made, so I want you to do something for me, but I don't want you to do too much, and I don't want the big singing at the table. I'll have a panic attack, but I don't want no one to notice it. And I want cake but I don't.

It's a nightmare, Like I don't know if you're like that, but on the goldilocks of my birthday, I cannot get the fucking temperature right. And I've been better. And I don't set myself up for disaster by planning some over the top crazy thing on the actual day, because I'll have a meltdown, nervous breakdown, and then I like, well,

it'll be too much. What I do is I plan nothing, and then like literally on the day of, which is what I'm doing today, I'll throw it together and I'll end up being a great dinner of like fourteen people but it'll be like I'll have a core group of a couple of people I want to see, make sure I'm with my daughter, if I'm in a relationship, and then I start layering in people. It could be people that work for me at my house. It could be an assistant, It could be a makeup person. It could

be a rando I saw yesterday. It could be an old friend I just started speaking to. I throw it together. It doesn't have to mean a lot, and everybody has to know. It's a hodgepodge and it's a bunch of stragglers, and everyone's going to be a good person and you're going to have a good time, and that's it. No expectations, good food. Let's say it happened and keep it fucking moving. I always get nice flowers. People make a big deal.

I'm very grateful. I'm terrible at remembering other people's birthdays. I hate when people remember mine because I always forget everyone else's, and when they remember mine, I start to feel self conscious about Oh my god, David was Song remembers my birthday every year, and I've never once remembered his because I don't even know what his is. And now it's been so many years of him remembering mine. I don't want to ask him what his is. Chuck Sodano,

same thing. I suck at that. I suck at remembering if it's your birthday, whether you're my best friend or anyone except for my child, I suck. So I will remember it the week before and I'll send a gift, But then I'll fucking forget on the day to text you because I never know what day it is. So that sucks too. So I suck at that, and I'm really sorry, and I get self conscious. So happy birthday to all of you. I will forget your birthday. I am sorry. I care, I do it in different ways.

I'm not perfect. So I love you guys. Happy birthday to you and to me. Bye.