I was just in Miami and Zzs and Carbone are part of a major food group. So if you buy Carbone sauce, if you've been to Carbone, if you've heard of Zz's, it's part of major food group. It's got Sidel's, et cetera. But it's basically they're the rolls Royce culin in the food groups. Like it's elite. They're celebrities in their own right, Okay, like Zz's. Carbone is a brand. Okay, it's air mes a food head to toe, it's a flex,
it's a nam ed up it's a thing. Like Raos is amazing because Rayo's is cool uptown and the sauce and Rayos aren't the same anymore. The brand isn't the same, and all the different restaurants aren't owned by the same as the sauce or so there's some separation and it's amazing and there is no reservation like Rayo's uptown and the sauce of Raos is excellent, excellent, Like it's a neck and neck horse race for that in Carbone. But REOs didn't do the whole food group thing, like wait,
we're gonna do another thing. We're gonna do another thing like these fucking Major Food Group people. They're entrepreneurs, they're savage beasts, Okay, and I'm here for it. I'll tell you why. I hear from this guy that I go out with on Friday. He's like, Oh, they're doing a thing over there on the beach. I got this crazy thing going with horses, that's all I hear. And I walked on the beach and I saw this crazy It looked like there were horses. I saw Qatar Airways. I
didn't see anything. I didn't see Carbone, name, etc. Next year, Major Food Group, make sure your fucking name is on that beach board, because you guys.
Were a draw.
But anyway, I saw Qatar Airways, which is not the same draw because you don't understand what it's gonna be. So someone says to me, they got this thing going. I had nothing going. I know the people from Zz's and Carbone. I'm like, what is it. They're like, come by. So the first night I didn't go and Sting does a surprise performance, so that's a kick in the nuts. But the night I go, I show up. I think
it's gonna be a zoo and it's not. You walk in, but like you have to be on a list, but like you walk in, I didn't do hair makeup.
I just wore my own dress. I did my own makeup.
I walk in through this like windy doorway and you can see the ocean from the second you walk in.
And it's a tent. It's a two story tent.
It's an apartment building, like if you've ever been to the racetrack of seeing it on TV, you see the clubhouses upstairs and like they've got a view of the track, et cetera. So they built this miniature ring like think Westminster Dog Show level. You know a ring, right, but it's not miniature. It's not miniature at all. Think hockey rink. Okay, in front of this two story apartment building on the sand on the ocean. Now, I don't think Katar Airways
could do this. But the backdrop, because the sky is pink and purple and blue, it's cotton candy sky.
It's crazy.
It looks like the icy flavors, like the pink like blue, like the it's insane.
It's Quitar Airways.
But I gotta get that it's like the Grand Arabians or the Grand It's it's a horse show.
The guy Alec Nass shout.
Out from Zz's and Carbone, who catered every fucking morsel of this entire thing, which like it's a flex to just go to Carbone.
Now you could just.
Like eat out of troughs of every type of their food. And I am in a supermodel glow up, so a I didn't get to eat up at b I didn't get up from the table because I was being attacked by a lot of people. Turns out I am actually supermodel and I'm internationally famous. I'm the Austin Powers of supermodels because I was attacked at this event and this was an elite af event. Okay, so we're on the beach,
then there's Arabian horses. So Alec Nass, from Zzi's major food group, he tells, I said, what the fuck it?
What is this? Because I grew up.
At the racetrack and elite derby shit, and we're gonna give a shout out to the derby in a minute. Because I was supposed to go this year. I just am having a nervous breakdown, so I can't go. So I'm gonna go back to whatever the fuck's Zz's and Carbone is doing because I'm basically their adopted child slash pet. I don't like social plans, so it's called point me in the direction of the Spicy Rigatoni. Whether it's gonna
have Arabian horses or chicken fights, I'm coming. So I'm sitting now, and they have carbone Zz's every dish, every dish. Zz's the spicy Cucumbus Carbone, the Rigatoni, sushi, the whole thing. It's calling rich bitch catering right beyond. And the event costs tens of millions of dollars and they planned it last minute. Okay, so we're on the beach in a two story condo and now you just see horses coming
out with the trainers. But it's not thoroughbred horse training and it's not show jumping, and I don't want to see that in the symbol. I can't explain it. It's too constricting. The show jumping is a little pretentious. It's giving a little palm beach. It's very elitist, it's very whatever, super flex rich and entry is quite expensive and all that shit. This is real rich, Like this is another level from even a questrian rich Across the board. This
is International Man of Mystery Rich. So we're in this tent and I did a video. I'm like, I'm a harlequin romance. My hair is blowing in the wind like I went through a dishwasher, but still my hair is blowing in the wind. There are like gorgeous, stunning, immaculate, impeccable dressed men everywhere. Every woman is dressed from like the most sexy sludy to elite gorgeousness. But like it's casual. This thing is casual. The event is expensive and dripping
filthy rich, but it's also casual. That's why it's cool. Like you could wear jeans and a T shirt if you wanted to. But the women are dressed that men are dress. And now you've Arabian horses going in circles and I don't even know what it means because but there's no saddle and there's no structures to jump over.
There are just people out there with these like like almost they look like like whips, like with that like little skinny thing on the end just to like like they're concert conductors that are like just making the horses do what they want, and the horses are supermodels. It's a horse fashion shit. That's what I'm calling it. Okay, Katari aras can call it what they want. This is a real competition for filthy rich people to invest in horses that like compete in shows. But they really they
don't have to do anything but look stunning. So think Naomi Campbell, Cindy Crawford, Claudia Schiffer. There was one Kardashian horse. It's just Maine was so long and dramatic. I was like, that is a Kardashian Okay, And they're.
Like wild looking.
They got it all be purebread, but like like gray gray, like stone by a pool, like slate. Grape horses with like black hair.
I don't know if there's a rule.
I don't know if you could die the hair if it's like the rules, they have to be natural, but like the black hair contrast or like a white horse or a chocolate horse. The skin is glistening like they are eating chia and asai e bowl wheak grass diye. It's like the glam on these horses. The diet they're eating. They are arawon horses through and throw, they eat at
airwon they only eat organic. I didn't love this event for one reason for them because there were fireworks and it made me cringe me a little because of them, and there was loud music and like later flow Ride it performed, but like also I've been out to events and it's been super loud and I haven't loved it. And I've also not like the rollercoaster or fireworks. What the fuck is the life of these horses year round? Yes, they have to do some they have to go to
the gym. Sometimes they have a boot camp. They see Berries boot camp, they see Tracy Anderson. They only the best. But like I think they're chilling all year long, just like sipping mocktails, like gorgeous, like fresh or muddled mocktails.
These horses I identify as a horse, Like you don't understand they're super model and you just watched them go in a circle and then somebody wins and the winner has like this incredible like pink gorgeous like garment, garment like gay man's Like there was a gay guy, the black gay man that was like the right hand to Anna Winter, like he was fabulous.
I don't know if he's still there. I don't know his name.
He's like famous himself, like an outfit, a garment that he would wear on these horses, like Carl Lagerfeld, like diamond encrusted pink rainbow colored garment on the Winner, and like the hair, just the bangs, like I want to come back as an Arabian horse going to a show on the beach that carbone and Zzi's is catering, Like are you kidding me?
I can't. So that was what I went to in Miami.
Miami's on fleek right now because it's got such a mix of all this shit, like Guido the Killer Pimp in his oversized watch and undersized T shirt and like tight jeans. And then you've got the guy that I posted about, who I called I named him Fabian. I said, he's like in my Harlequin romance novel, this guy like he was stunning. His arms were Ai.
He was Ai.
He was an AI guy to match the Ai sky and I posted about him, and the Gaze woke up very early on the day posted. They're like, what the fuck is wrong? You didn't know that's Pietro. Like what they're like, he's an Italian famous model. He was a math teacher turned influencer turned supermodel. I'm like well, does he know I'm a fucking supermodel too. I was at the gym the next day with a trainer. I was like, what, he was so stunning and I just happened to find him.
But every man was like him. They had like stunning men and horses falling off of trees. It was insane. So that's what I did this weekend.
What did you do?
I think of ridiculous things late at night. By the way, thank you all for listening. I see that, like, I don't know, there was like a sort of cult following of you guys. I just know because of the messages and some people that reach out to me, and like I see the numbers and it just feel like it's just like there's a group of you that like watch religiously. So I do preach. I really do preach. And it means like a friend today texted me and they go,
can you stop? I'm crying on the subway talking about Jeppetto in the back making the shoes. And every person that texts me this, I go, I don't know what you're talking about, because I forget the things that I say. I know not what I say. I never knew what I said on the reality show The Housewives. Either when I tell you I'm so fucking stressed, I was just about to do a rant or a read or an ad or I don't. I'm so fucking my stress is at like a seventeen. I am like I'm on the
Amazing Race how I felt on The Apprentice. I feel like I'm like that cartoon character that has like those the big white like eyeballs with the cracks, the red cracks in them, like you see those like Halloween store eyeballs that have the cracks going through them, Like that's my permanent eyeball. Now. Incidentally, I also think my eyeballs are a different color now because people tell me Lash Serum dyed them. So I died my corneas still fucking ass, Oh I die my cornea is, but here we are
fuck Like. I was like, wait, my eyes are green now, the tiger's eye. Do I get a choice in this? Do I get to go back last serum companies? Because I have now tiger's e eyes I had green.
I don't.
It doesn't seem to be hurting my dating life, but it would be something I'd like to be part of. In the morning meeting so anyway, I had a glass of wine on the plane today. My first glass of wine spilled all over my Rathia straw J Crew bag that I talked about being the best bag ever then sold it out, and J Crew themselves were texting me, not me, texting my team or emailing my team, saying that like their own, j CU employees are now being influenced to buy bags of their own brand, like you
guys fucking have the catalog. Okay, don't ask, but now I probably can't get back into the club to get the own bag that I fucking loved because I spilled wine all over it. And I haven't been drinking. I haven't been drinking for a while, but like, do you
ever feel so strung out and spun out? There's nothing besides like a horse tranquilizer And remember old school when like Will Ferrell was like dancing in the quad or something because he's streaking in the quad because he was on a horse tranquilizer or maybe that was two parts to that movie. I need someone to come up to me and just like be like it's okay, it's okay.
Just just just keep saying hi, pretty bird multiple times in a row, like someone's gonna like just just put a needle in my arm for relief, just like it's okay. She needs to be fucking relaxed, sedated, wrapped in bubble, in a straight jacket, in a padded cell, and someone needs to put a needle in a run. So here's another thing I realized in thinking about the success of this podcast, which is.
Doing very well.
We don't I sit here right now and no makeup off the plane unless something is major's going on that I'm gonna opine on something you guys are gonna give a shit about. Yes, we have social media assets, but we don't really focus on the social media.
And I used to be obsessed with like the video, the video? How not video? And how do we not video? Let me tell you something.
Podcasts are in audio form, and it seems archaic like that we don't give a shit.
But I could tell you something. I just realized.
If I watch clips of Alex Cooper or Joe Rogan or whatever, I just watched the clips, I think I've seen the podcast. I've never seen the podcast. I've only seen the clips, so I don't know how much money they make on the clips. But if they're not in the clip business and they're in the podcast business. To me, it really I don't give a fuck and it really doesn't matter.