Keith Robinson

This is me, Craig Ferguson. I'm inviting you to come and see my brand new comedy hour. Well it's actually it's about an hour and a half and I don't have an opener because these guys cost money. But what I'm saying is I'll be on stage for a while. Anyway, come and see me live on the pads on Fire tour in your region. Tickets are on sale now and we'll be adding more as the tour continues throughout twenty twenty five and beyond. For a full list of dates,

Whereat on one of the best.

She kind of is she The last time I saw her, it wasn't long after Chris had done that joke about her at the Oscars.

She was like, what the.

Fuck is that he'd done some joke about her the Oscars. Remember, Yeah, I can't remember what it was, but she was like, what the fuck? But she You worked with her when we were at CBS, right, Yes, you were doing the one was the one to sc show. Yes, And you had the big studio and we had the little studio. I remember, because we had the little studio. Because that's what we're saying. Just before the comedians used to be on We're on my late night show. Because the studio

He's a great performance.

He's not believable, right, he gets a bad name, but I've never watched it. I've seen him live a couple of times, and I've I've hung out with him and he's.

He's you know what, as we call his comics. We stick to, you know, well running.

Packs, right, you ain't a part of that pack.

You're out, yeah, and you.

All that's right when you do the Puppets. I did the Puppets on late Night. I was like, you're gone, you know, But that's that's why I was like, I saw you do a set at the Village Underground, the comedy Sailor place. Ye last week I was like, fuck, that's as good as it as ever I've seen. Given the fight to you. You've had a stroke, two strokes.

Yeah, you don't just have one stroke, so you got to compare it to something.

I don't know. I mean I feel like you could you can get one stroke?

No, no, no, like, man, this one didn't feel right right, I don't know.

It is the sequel then? Never, the sequel is never as good as the first one.

Oh man, the sequel was a doozy.

Yeah, I remember you said, did you know? Do you know when the second one was happening? You're like, is happening again?

Did you? Did you fess then the first one was happening on the second one?

Well, do you know if it's a stroke?

I'm a man crag, I'm I'm.

A man man too.

But if I was no, no, you're not a real man.

No that's true. I'm foreign I'm foreign born, that's all.

I was a loyal man would take a stroke on just as he was like.

But but did you was like, did it come on gradually? It was just like I don't stroke.

Like one morning for the first stroke, I woke up and I was leaning walk into my apartment leaning.

You woke up, walk into your apartment. Now woke up and oh, you've been walking through your apartment and walking through my apartment and I'm leaning. Something's going on. My right side was going down. So I'm like, oh, man, had you got a big night the night before? I had you been like doing like being wild?

Adn't. I don't really drink that much. A couple of wines and all that. But I woke up, I was leaning, and I was I'm like, okay, let me go to phild up here. And drove from Jersey to philadelf here till I get my pass for it. So something's going on behind. Brought some ask for with me. A couple of answerings. Okay, all right, I'm drawing filling.

You feel better? You were driving?

Yeah, well I'm a man.

Yeah you're a man. Yeah, I got it. You're driving.

A dumb man. But no, I got no.

I've been I've been with the same room for twenty years. She's driven me twice. She's like white, she's perfectly decent driver. I'm like, yeah, but I'll drive.

Yeah, I got it. I like that. Yeah, you are a man.

I am a man now. If I have a stroke now I'll be like, Okay, I said, yeah, maybe it will be recompense for using the puppets and late night because I get allowed back into the pack. He did the puppets, but he also had the stroke. So yeah, were you on your own when you drove to Phillio?

Yes, Jesus, I'm a man.

Well yeah, but so did you go to the hospital when you go to Philly?

Would a man go to a hospital?

I feel like maybe I wanted a Social Security place to get my pass for it.

Okay, where were you going? And he needed a passport?

Scotland?

Shut the fuck up?

You know, I was going, you know, on Broad right, but I ain't going to a broad because the stroke. So I had a stroke for like it 'mu been a twenty four hour stroke right cause one thing?

And now I wanted to see my son. He was forming at the place and I wanted to see him. The plane slop playing right, but I was going down. I can feel myself going down.

It was getting worse, yes, right.

But I you know, I'm vinuine blurry and all that. But I took a couple of more ass fors and again vision clear it up. There you go. I drove back home.

You are a man to Jersey damn right, yeah, yeah you are.

I drove back to Jersey. Yeah, man, I wanted to cellar. Then a radio show.

Really, yes you still you still haven't seen a medical professional because you're a man. Yeah, I got it. Yeah, so you haven't seen a medical profession. We're now twenty four hours under the stroke. But and you're taking the aspirin for a stroke.

Yes, okay, but it's working cause I guess the blood blood. So you know, after that, I drave back home. Wow. After that, right after that, then the radio show.

I'm opposed to do a spot, but everything is dropped energy everything. I'm like, oh ship. So I went down the alleyway Menana Lane, straight down ally and walked down there, got my car.

And drove home.

Again with the driving, drove home. Where do you live?

Just Jersey? That's like a half hour forty minutes way.

You take a bridge of the tunnel, I mean, just because you know, everybody, just.

To make it longer. Yeah, I want to ride a little longer. I want him Holland tunnels.

Yeah, I think the tunnel.

I think the tunnel this way. People are always like, now you can't take the tunnel. I'm like, I don't know the way you can get off the breadge either, you.

Know, right, I took that tunnel one home and then it really had call my girlfriend at the time.

She was in the house, you know.

She came out and I can barely walk, okay, but I still like, just make sure I did ten push ups.

You're fucking well.

She would took me into and I'm taking it to the hospital and the like he's having a stroke.

To were you were? Were you scared at this point? No, I understand that was probably the wrong question.

What the hell is going on? I clearly explaining you.

I felt like I felt like I brought a little bit of myself there. I got scared for you, but but I'm less manly.

You know. I think I got a little friends.

Sometimes sometimes I would worry about worry.

Thing while they said, you know, like I was still samorright, because I boxed a little bit, you know what I mean, And I was throwing jams.

I went the hospital and woke up and it's all went down. I'm like, I'm trying to throw jabs and all that and nothing. There's all the way down and langua was down. I was in the hospital for like a month and a half.

A month and a half were you in a bed for us? No mean, let you walk around.

Well, well, in the hospital, they try to restrict you as much as possible, so like and when you try to get up, alarm, like when you're in the brain injuring unit, if you get out on the band, turn your feet touch the floor, alarm goes off. So it's like almost being in the pen, you know, penitentiary.

Yeah, I understand. I've been in this country for a while. I can speak to lingo.

And seeing your foot at the ground, all the marsves come running in and all that. So it took them a while. And trust me to do what I do. And then I want to know we have and then we have to do all the tricks and taying this and taining that and for your content to make sure you're as smart as Donald Trump.

You know.

And that's that's the baseline.

Because.

Depends on what hospital when you go to, I mean the fancy hospitals might be it's gonna be a little more.

You gotta do a little more.

But they but I think that you know, did they test you, like with jokes and stuff like that because.

They take you with like squares circles. They think that something, you know, they actual em me, dad, what's today's day?

Was stairs? Was that? Why?

I don't know if I could answer that.

No, I mean funk wing them sometimes. Yeah, you would you go to yout your name? What is your name?

Reverend doctor Martin Luther King? They almost had a heart at time. He's really messed up. Oh my god, God's messed up. So what coust Did they know what caused it? No, it wasn't like ice coffee around.

It was like.

Combine eating hammonds and cholestral cholesterol one damn damn caffeine and all that.

Yeah, I.

Gotta watch my cholesterol. Went for a thing. I know you had a stroke, but I had a medical recently and they told me I have to bring my cholesterol.

Now. I think they're scarce whateverything.

Yeah, Hello, this is Craig Ferguson and I want to let you know I have a brand new stand up comedy special out now on YouTube. It's called I'm So Happy and I would be so happy if you checked it out. To watch the special, just go to my YouTube channel at the Craig Ferguson show and is this right there? Just click it and play it and it's free.

I can't look.

I'm not going to come around your house and show you how to do it. If you can't do it, then you can't have it. But if you can figure it out, it's yours. You're about the same age as me, or yeah, you're like a couple of years younger.

Mean what age you know? I'm seventy eighth. The fuck.

Like, are you sixty yet?

Yes?

I'm sixty three now, Oh you know old man? I got I pee more than I do Anthon else so do I.

Man. I'm like, I can't stop paying. I don't like I.

Didn't even drink it. Mean, why there's nothing here. I'm like the fucking Sahara desert and I'm still peak coming out. It's crazy.

I'm almost scared to drink water. I'm like, I don't want to pee. I know why you up again?

I was walking over the Williamsburg Bridge today because I was trying to go stay healthy, and I started to walk over the bridges of the I don't know if I can get over here. Don't be like, I'll give it a go. But by the time I go over, I was like, like, I have to find a hipster coffee shop.

But that's why it's important, man, It's important for man like else to find women and understand man, I want peel himself.

Well, I drank a little when I was younger, so I met that was kind of the way I would always find a woman. Did you think as well? Here's the trick, by the way, if you wake up and there's pee in the bed, don't assume responsibility right away. Try and say, is there something wrong? Do you feel sick? Lay off the you know, I like it? Yeah, just blame the p on someone else exactly. It doesn't work that well with vomit, but it works.

Is a good thing.

Yeah, I think so. But did you were there no signs of this, the signs of the stroke coming to you?

Sign the.

Like before you had that me they had, oh.

Right, And now I was going Vegas for like me, Cavin Horton, come on on Vegas one. I don't want to that's my yellow fella, right.

I Also you probably want to see carrot Top as well, because.

Yeah, you know what, like Karen do I That's what I'm saying.

I'm going to have him on the show. I do like Carry. I'm not fucking around. I do like him. I think he's a much maligned character.

But I watched it happen. Man. Comics they're just they chased out of comics, out of the business. Yeah, I know. They're like they are like like hyenas.

Man. I never really hung with comics. No, And then when and when I was a young comic because I was just like drunk and I would hang out with bands. And then when I got late Night because I had worked on the Drew Carrey Show and it's it was seen like I had stolen the job from a comic in some way because it's and I was like, but I was a fucking comic for years before I did the Drew Carry Show.

And they're like, you knew comedy in Scotland.

Yeah, and in London too. I did stand up.

I came in there Scotland and in London in ninety two.

That's the year I got sober. Really yeah, that's probably why, because you were there. I was like, fuck, man, yeah, there's a real man here. Now I can't drink anymore.

I'm bomb so bad in Scotland did you really then?

Festival?

No? That we had something called Latinum Comedy. Okay, and when we wore jackets and all that, the girls one phonas and were in Scotland and I love Scotland. And but you guys like to fight.

Man, Well that's why I left because I you know, a real man situation.

Yeah, that's a real.

Man Yeah.

No, they did.

There's a little bit of fighting.

Yeah. They were like, I don't have you what you don't have me? What does that mean? Yeah? Do you know what?

Some of the things that the way they say things like you know, when people say in America they say you've got followed through. He's like, it's real follows through. It's like, yeah, it follows through. And Breton means you shut yourself. So if you say somebody he followed through, you go he fed like he chefs out. Really it makes sense. It kind of feels. Yeah.

I loved it.

Man, you had a good time.

But that's my first time on brow like that, you know, so I'm like, oh wow, I had a wonderful time there.

For like a month, we're in Edinburgh, Glasgow, Glasgow, and yeah, yeah, Glasgow is That's where I'm from. Glasgow.

That's why I'm saying who the guy always on the piano.

Comenian Liberacci?

No comedian comedian?

Uh, Scottish guy. Yes, I know, I bet yeah, but if he's got a piano, that's kind of like having one of.

The biggest comings out with Billy.

Oh Billy Connley. Yes, oh that he was like he was like fucking Jackie Robinson's to me Conley because until Belly, Billy's twenty years older than me.

Oh wow.

And he was like my hero because he was from in Britain, you know, the class system thing. I'm from, like the lower classes, and he is. He was a working class comedian. I had never seen anybody from my background when I was like ten years old, and he was like thirty years old. So he's just coming up happened. And we would listen to his albums the way American kids would listen to like Cosby albums and stuff. I would be listening to the Belly stuff.

Well, yeah, I'd seen them all and he was when one staying at a hotel in Glasgow, right, you know, you know he was playing in piano.

I didn't even know Belly could play the beyond. Yeah, well, you know, I'd never associate him with the piano, is what I mean.

I see them Mellane County.

You know what I well, you know it's that thing. You know, you suck one sheep, you know that's all everybody remembers.

Yeah, I loved it.

You know you had a good time. Why did you never go back?

Well you told Bob.

Yeah, but everybody bums everywhere, even you gotta get I want to really did was it like bood and stuff?

No, it wasn't bowing gotta count like we want to in London, right like in America when like we try the energy. Yeah, but the crowds were laid back. Yeah, you don't need to or no slow down. Yeah, but I'm like I was gonna watch this.

You know they got mad.

Yeah, we had that on him.

The You ever heard musicians talk about when they go to Japan and play tours in Japan, they'll be like broken out on stage in the end of the to the audience will be like, yeah's coaturally different, that's all you have to Yet.

I had a stroke. That's the difference. A stroke helped me. Me.

Like, when out a stroke, I was, you know, packed from my home. I scramble all on. When a stroke, Tom Rainey in the pocket.

You know what I mean, moved to the left for a little bit. Yeah, but you know what I mean.

Like that is the thing though, learning how it stays still on stage and do your thing. It's actually it is better for it's much better for Like the best comics don't run around. I used to run like a fucking.

Idiot all the time. I'll fall down and back up.

I'd be like trying to every individual thing. And now I'm like if I woke out and then I'll talk and then I woke back, that's it. That's all I'm going to do.

Well, you learn that though through the year.

It takes time. It takes time as well. When did you first get back up after after the stroke?

Was this?

It took me like maybe come a few weeks and now I'm back on stage.

Man, that is fucking stones there, I mean you are man.

That's second one. Yeah, two years.

The same one was much worse than huh yeah you didn't drive.

Yeah, because my voice came back weren't good when the first stroke. Now with this one and like you're not gonna be able to talk again, and you want to get me to talk again, tell me I'm not going to talk.

Yeah, you know, I did it take a while. I mean it took two years ago.

Yeah, well that's we're going to scan. Don't know the war is gonna come out? Oh what happened if the War I get on stage all of a sudden?

Nothing? Yeah.

Well, it's funny. When I saw you do this set the other night, it was like I watched it and I was like, how is this going to go? Because I you know, I hadn't seen the special at that point. I since watched it and went okay, okay, find fucking nailed it, but I hadn't seen it. I was like, I'd heard that you'd had a stroke, right, And.

I was like, I don't know how this is going to work when that's what my thing was.

But what was amazing, Like after about thirty seconds just to comic on stage, Well.

You gotta make it though, Why I do my best? I means such an assholey.

Yeah yeah, yeah, But it was kind of interesting way it becomes because you make it like it's it's like it's part of the thing, you know, It's just like it's this is who I am, this is what I'm doing, and yeah, and it kind of yeah, I hate that. All that would freak me out.

Get out that. Yeah?

Did you get better that when you first went up? Did you feel it with the first Yeah?

But I say something so fucked up? Fuck him? Yeah, that's why I want you. Yeah, and that's exactly where I want you to fuck him?

Fuck have dare It's an interesting thing. Tell me about the second one?

Then?

That was how long I'm between the first and the second one?

I had the second one and twenty sixteen, oh right, the next one came twenty twenty, and in twenty twenty.

Did you get COVID or something?

Did that? Did that? Dude? I got no?

And just what happened? And I'm trying my best. It's a real story, this girl, what I mean I mean? And we're imposed to going to.

Vegas together then right? Wo man? Yeah, sent up, everything's good. While COVID came right no Vegas.

Around Thanksgiving in twenty twenty, she's saying, won't when you come see me in my house and not going on? You know, you can't have things given on your family or whatever.

Say I'll go to Phoenix, Arizona.

They get some right, So this is a romantic assignation. Yeah, Okay, I got it.

I brought flowers with me now now so you should do.

You should bring flowers so gas station flowers are fighting.

But you know, so I tell everybody my son, his mom and all, I'm going to perform with Louis King.

So you want to be too much. And I'm going there before and looking for Louis all the stuff he wanted them. Now me I had more.

So I get this stroke. And I was on my way out, flying there like its real ship flying up. It was only I'm first fians some cournos y.

Yeah, it goes with that. Man. Man, it's another running playing.

I got it. So I'm drinking. You know, they give you all.

I'm plastic, but they, you know, want to make the announcement twenty minutes away. And when I so, I'm and I know I'm not gonna get twenty minutes, ten minutes to our house, thirty minutes.

I'm fopping the viavon because I want to be ready.

You took fai Igra twenty minutes before landing, Yeah, because you figured it would be thirty minutes to rest, knowing you'd already had a fucking stroke. That's why it kids out fucking just this is the greatest fucking story I've ever heard.

So, you know, get in the car. Yeah, once I get off the plane now and got off the plane, I sat.

Do you have an erection at this point?

Right? Good? Okay, So that's what kept me walking.

So I'm i'm I'm like, oh ship man. At getting in the car, I'm like, oh fuck, shout, I go to the hospital.

Or getting Oh yeah, it's a it's a real, it's a real.

Get laid, get laid.

It's a dead level.

No one, I'm not going on the door, right, she got in there, open the door. We started doing on something and uh that is just count what. I still spend the night and.

I woke up. I can't even moved. The ambulance came in. Wow. Yeah, the ambulance left me up out out of the pussy.

So so again there was you spend the whole night there, Yes, stupid, just that. But this is amazing to me. So there's you take the fright access. So the vakara wears off or it doesn't wear off.

I doesn't wear off. Yes, my you know, my body is like, but he's about to die. What are you doing?

You're about to die? But your but your phoenix is still going.

To try my best friend.

Jesus. So you were like you were in the hospital in Phoenix.

Then, yes, I was in the hospital of the Phoenix, and I'm like, I can't stay here.

That's Phoenix. You cant stay there. You can go for a weekend, but you guys.

Stay I need to go back. Yeah, I said, no, you're not supposed to flying back on the stroke, flying back, I'm gone, And I flew back.

First class. Yeah, I'm sorry. I just wanted to make sure that you.

Think I'm gonna have a stroke and a coach thirty four b.

No, you don't want to have a stroken coat. No, that's about That's like the kid behind you with at the back of your chair.

I was been dead. Yeah, yeah to the front. Yeah, no, you have to have it.

So but you didn't have one of them. You flew back. How long until you flew back?

Well, I stayed there at night, and I don't you're kidding me why I keep telling you?

No, I know, but I mean, Jesus Christy, he did it. That's nuts. And so you went.

And it's nuts when I think about, like, what the hell was I thinking?

And also the fact they let you on the plane, you know, I mean, you could have followed that play like that. I've seen I've seen people on planes like that though, but they figured out was drunk. They just thought you were drunk in to this because you were first class. They let you on because he's in first class. What are you gonna do?

You can't in them first class, You can't come back.

Yeah, he's not gonna die, he's first class.

He's setting there. Man. Yeah. Man.

So what happens after you have a stroke though, when you're your way back, do you have to like go to like the physical rehabit?

Wanna sent me in a driver one? Damn?

Yeah, that's fucking great.

Well you know, I mean want more roommates? Yeah, you back away?

Yeah, so, but she sent me in room, my man Robert and my son's mom and all them came and picked me up. And when you drove, you know, to the hospital in Jersey.

Jam K from JFK, Well, no, w SIRT hospital was yet.

Oh JFK hospel. We didn't like the JFK airport to JFK hospital. One never cared for. I don't suppose that's an important part of the story, but it's worth knowing.

No, it's not that important. It's not important from Norington during the hospital as long is that? Do you what? What do you? What do you take?

The bridge is a tunnel? You know it doesn't.

I think it was pelaskious.

But so how long are you like totally incapacitated when they're saying to you, he's not going to speak again, he's not going to do all that.

I was never incapacitated. All right, I'm always fighting, right, you know what I mean? Because when you can go to the hospital, they treat every patient. All strokes ain't the same, but they treat you like yanny of mine and you don't know what's going on.

And that was the case for you though.

No, no, I don't know.

It's weird, but they you know, one woman now on like you move like no, no, no, you can't hold and I don't want to go.

To the bathroom.

You can't hold yourself up, and the bitch you look at me, I start doing you know, shut ups. I just looked like I can't pull myself up. Yah nah, you bitch.

Well I got jumped by a pack of nurses. You could jump, Yeah, they jump me.

What did you what did they do? They take your stuff the bathroom.

When you you know, you got a stroke or whatever. You lane shoots up because you're getting spasmed, right, and then you shut up and a woman like, oh, he's fight me, he's fighting me, and so yeah, they jump on me. You were kicking him, Yeah, like bitch spasms thing. Get I want to bring us up because you talked the viagura early on. Did you get specims in your No, I wish I did every it would be great and just pop up. I don't know. I was like, sorry, that be great. I would have loved that.

Yeah, that's uh so you were in there. How long were you were? Like two years before you go on stage, but you're in the hospital for like a long months two months, and then you have to like go to learn Well you could always walk though, right.

No, you got to learn how to walk again.

You know.

Oh it's like it's all mental and confidence, right you know, so you starting to slowly learn how to walk again, and uh man, you walk and walk and walk. But I can tell this what was different behind this lane fount?

You know? Yeah, this is a loosy right there.

Yeah, you're talking about boxing, like Bolks the people I know who and I did a little bit years and years ago as well. Like the kind of shape that you get in by Balks is great shape. I mean the best shape I've been in my life is when I'm exactienth my god. And do you think that because you were in that kind of shape, that's what go you through the Yeah?

Well yeah, what life as you prepared? Yeah? Well everything you know on the stroke and all that, you have that fighting spirit. Yeah, and you're just going I'm not going down now, not now?

No, No, is it going to improve? Do you think they think the doctor's thing.

Is go ahead for wow? Uh?

You know you just I don't think about it becausen't even think about it and getting but yeah, it's improving anyway, you know, going, I'm gonna understand.

I was going to say, once you go. My thing, you know, stand up is stand up is actually even if you're just standing up doing it, I mean for any length of time, it's standing tiring.

But that's what I'm saying. During an hour, I was scared when I did my hour, you know, back to back hours.

Yeah, because you do it special, you gotta when it worked, Yeah, that where did you shoot.

That Sony Music Hall?

Where's that?

Well?

Well?

Four in town?

So when you're getting there from Jersey, you take the tunnel or no?

When I do, I take the long waye cheap, no toe unless toll.

Right, So you're gonna go up and around? Yes, all right, okay? Or maybe get a boat or get a boat fair? Yeah, I got fair. I don't take the fair take the fairies.

I hate any place you gotta catch a fairy to go to. I okay, all those what's that?

Uh holland?

No, and it's in Boston somewhere.

Oh, Martha's Vineyard.

Yeah, I can't stand now, I ain't Martha's venue.

No, have you ever been to Martha's Vineyard?

Yes? Why I hate it?

Why? I just I didn't see much to hte about it.

That's all.

They got a nice cream parlor, and Barack Obama is there.

I think I know, but it still bugs me. And yeah, the faerry to get to us.

Yeah, you know what I don't like. I lived in a place once where you had to take a ferry, and they always the ferries are always breaking down. That's why you know, when I'm going to Jersey, I take the tunnel. I mean a lot of people say don't, but I do. I do take the tunnel, which especially if you're going to New York, take the tunnel. I've moved back to New York after being away for a long time, and I fucking love this study.

I love. Yeah, I'm from Philadelphia.

Yeah that's right, But you moved up here a while ago.

Right ninety two on til one. And when moving to New York.

Right, that's the year ago. So you went up to New York. But Philly where you grew up in Philly?

Was it was it rough? Oh?

Yeah, yeah, it was a rough stop, you know what I mean, Like you know when when were well, we can leave my doors on whatever because of my one that woman you know, yeah she shot and all that and that gun. Yeah, she shot a guy in a car game?

And is this a Western? What's she shot a guy in a fucking card game? Your mom shot a guy in a car?

What is like?

Was he was he cheating? What?

I don't know what?

You know, I was young man, but I was like nine ten, right, And next thing I know, we're on a bus, Greyhound bus, on a.

Run because your mom's on the run, because she showed a guy didn't die shot.

I don't care.

Well, you know that's that his story. That's no juice story, and.

That nothing to do with me.

No, but we would, we wanted. We moved to Feathereralsburg, Maryland for about one.

Year until the heat comes off.

And then and I never.

Forget when parent and teacher day and then T was like, your Sonny, he's not focused. We need him to focus. And Mom like, why can't you focus?

Mom? Because you're on and run now how you want me to focus?

It's be very difficult though, its a parent, I think to discipline your kids because you can always say, mom, you shot a guy in a car. Yeah, like if my mother had said it was tight for bed. Oh is it you shot a guy? Yeah?

Let me make this call real bad were in f bird.

Yeah, come and get us. So did your mom still play cards? She passed away, pass away, but she still playing cards after that?

Yes?

Yeah, probably for the best.

Everybody back in the seventies had a lot of car games.

You know, actually I kind of remember that too. People used to come run there and play cards. Yeah, and little bit but it's just for like a little bits of money. It wasn't like what we went for potatoes. It was really for actually potatoes, Like I'll bet you one potato.

What they had what they call rent parties so on to get your rent that you had an old game soul dinners and all that playing the card games. Everybody was cheating, you know, But yeah, that's that's.

Quite a spectacular. Now, my wife has this idea that all comedians have the same mother, because she and my mother had uh you know, they had a relationship. It was she says, I don't know if it applies to your mom, but she says that all comedians also, she says, only good stand up comedians have the same good starting comedians of the same mode, cold with bad boundaries.

That's what she said.

Now, my mom was just like she showed a guy in a card game. There's nowhere you can go with this, Keith. It's not like you're gonna sell this, like my moment is a great mom.

She was a sweetheart.

Oh my god, how did you end up then getting a stand up from that background?

I mean, you know, I would always tell stories right now when living in uh Let's passion projects, and I always tell a story about the lecture man behind the TV and they had them all laughing and all that. And then when I got old and older, I got and I kept here and win your and uh and from listening to Richard and I'm like, I can't do that.

Now she and some comedies that was awful. I'm like, I can do that. You can do that? Yeah, yeah, I can. I can do that.

It's funny. I mean that when you talk about and I've heard other comedians say that's about Richard Bryan is that's the way I think about Billy. We were talking about that. I didn't know if I could do that, but I thought it doesn't look like a good way to live.

It's not thinking it comes to think of it is not it's not really.

I was a kid, you know, it looked like everybody's your friend. And you get up, Yes, then you get further round and everybody's know your friend, not your friend.

But comedy probably saming from Alana the Bullship. Yeah, well you know on these streets and all that. Yeah, I ain't new comedy.

Where did you start doing stand up?

Man? Was in Philadelphia? Yeah?

Whereabout? It was the club there or.

Something comedy in Factory Island, right third and banc streets is still there.

No, all right, clubs are gone. It seems to me like the law of that coming back.

Coming back again.

But it feels like I don't know if I'm right on this. But I did a couple of drop ends at the Saillar last week and it is fine.

I like doing it.

But it was fun, it was great, it was fun. It's a good room and it was funny and it was funny. But I'm so used to doing an hour ninety minutes. Like doing that fifty minutes long kind of like you have to sharpen your.

Shit little a little bit more.

Yeah, well then you go back and tell them you want to do an hour in one in the room and they'll give me an hour.

Right, I don't know if I want to do that.

You're sad you usually doing an hour?

Yeah, But I don't know if I want to do it there, because I don't know. Am I going to take the bridge, I'm going to take the tunnel? Am I going to get there?

I don't know. I don't know if I want to do that. Also, I feel like it might be cover helicopter.

A helicopter, fucking taking a helicopter, man, No, I actually I don't think I'll ever get a helico again.

The same. Yeah, I don't forget those holocopters.

Yeah, it's not for me.

I'm not safe.

They're not safe. They're not safe. I don't care what anybody says. I don't want to get in a helicopter. He used to do you know what, Bill burfly a helicopter.

Yeah, I will never get in a damn hell County No, Bill, No.

You know it's just a no again. I'm sure he's a great pilot.

Bullshit.

You know I've got a pilot's license. Yeah, I got it, not for helicopters. But I used to be terrified of flying, so I thought if I learned a fly to fly the plane, I won't be scared. Well, here's what happens. I learned how to fly the plane, and I'm about twenty minutes from landon in Phoenix one time, and a guy at the bell no mention. A guy at the back who takes a viagraa because he's going to meet his girlfriend and he's start and I'm traumatized.

I haven't flown ste No every time, I have faith in my heart.

Just oh, I know, really, Chris wrote one minute, one minute, come rain for right, And I was so scared to get all flights.

I'm like, do you get you get on the air place? Now you're okay? Yeah, I mean when I first I'm like, yeah, where would you have to go to write out to l A. No, he was working on and oh not the Live Earth thing. Yes, yeah, that's fine. I ran into him when he was doing that. I was I was doing We were in the same hotel in Charlotte.

Yeah, and the only time Chris what I was.

Going to go Charlotte. Unny, they have a great comedy club. It was the Comedy Zoom. That's a great club.

Amazing, Yeah, that one.

And I like the W's in Denver.

They have these really good questions.

With David All. Did that Skanks for the Memories? Yeah, yeah, that I love that. I guess I was an album really when it wasn't really even a special.

Well his own he's just like, you know, does his own things. I love them.

I had to when I heard Skanks for the Memories. I was driving from uh somewhere in central California to LA and I had to pull over its side of the road, but he did that thing. I was laughing so hard I couldn't I couldn't actually drive. I had to pull over. It was when he was doing that thing about having his friend who was a midget. Yeah, and OK, my god, it just got worse and worse,

It's what we do.

We so you process it.

Right, Yeah, we dare to do whatever.

Yeah, in school and everything is quiet, you know, coming up, I'm like, how can I start some trouble?

Yeah?

And that's a common thinking, all right, I mean quiet, I'm saying, not assembly. Finally I'll starting to call and call and I'm like, god, damn, then get out of it, hang out and I would you know.

You know, Cicero in ancient Rome said a great thing I think can anyone in true business should remember. He said, if you want to know who your friends are start a fight. That's a great fucking thing. And I feel that's like a comedian's mind a little bit, you know what I mean. It's like, all right, let's fucking say, oh we got it. Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's a little bit. Sometimes I think there's a little bit of sometimes you maybe shouldn't start a fight because you're gonna lose.

Hey man, sometimes you can't, you know.

Also, though I do, I think to the day I die, I'll be full of admiration for the idea of I've already had one stroke. But it's twenty minutes to landing, and I'm happy at our house and I'm going to take a fucking VI. I like, that's the maddest, most one of the most beautiful things I've ever heard about.

It's still it's what I think about romantic.

It's so romantic. And the fact that they had to, like, you know, lift you out there, it's just fabulous. Thanks so much for coming in, Manly. Yeah, I can't tell you how impressed I am with well, first of all, the fact that the you know, you're the comic that you are, but also that you processed this and still turned it into comedy. It's just funny, outstanding. It's outstanding, that's right. Yeah.

It was on Netflix, man, Netflix.

I know, I really think that was quite a wonderful title. I met him, by the way, you know who was the little guy again Gary? What was his name.

Was that low guys? I met him. I met him.

He was on the Drew Carry Show when I was on. Oh wow, Yeah, he came on.

He was.

I mean, we had an afternoon chatting.

I think it's his folks took all the money.

I think I think that came up. Actually, I think you mentioned that. Yeah, and that's a man.

Mom. He shoots in a car game. That's a good mom.

Well, pistol whips one of the other ladies in the drive for me? Yeah, well, I know, yeah, for me. For you, yeah, I suppose.

It's so different mom, A different different mom.

You know what, though, I think if my mom, if she had had access to a pistol, she made a pistol whip.

Yeah. A lot of moms in the seventies Lee's had a twenty two, you know.

Where I grew up, But they had there was more, you know, clubs and knives and stuff clubs, and there was still isn't a lot of guns over there, you know, that's right. Yeah, it's not a lot of guns. Nobody has that.

I'm blaming the government, Well mom for my mom shooting somebody.

Wait what wait?

Why is the government access to gods?

Access to gods? That's right. If she didn't have a gun, she would have had.

To use a gloves What is the difference?

Get the fuck out