Urzila Carlson Reveals The Surprising Reason Behind Aussie Couples' Biggest Fights

Get morning.

Every day we say a very good morning too, probably our favorite comedian.

I think that's very very fair.

That'll get back to the others Ursula Carlson, good morning.

Good morning. If it doesn't get back to them, I will tell them all through our WhatsApp group.

Are you genuinely in a WhatsApp group with other comedians?

Yeah, Like there's the golf one. There's we have of all these different groups. So the comics is played golf. Of the ones from heavy been playing attention And there's also now more and more people who start playing golf because you know, we're all now going for no one smokes anymore. I'dly anyone drinks anymore. But now we've got to tay go. I think it's system. We're aging out.

Yeah, do you play golf?

I do?

Okay, do you have a handicap?

Yeah?

Golf?

Well, I would love to play around golf with Earth because I don't know how you seriously you take it. But I'm always the first one and be like, why do we need scorecards?

I start off with that. I go, come on, let's just keep a friendly guy, put a friendly and then if I have a good round, because I honestly think golf is like like the baggage carousel. It's a great equalizer. You can play with someone with a two handicap and then you come in with your twenty six handicap and then you have a bit around in there.

Yes you know.

So then if I do have a good round, I go see. This is why I said let's not keep score, because I didn't want to embarrass anyone. But if I have a terrible round, I go see, let's just keep a friendly guy. Let's just keep real friendly.

Don't take this the wrong way, but I think you'd be terrible at like golf etiquette in a great way though, because I just think you'd be loud and funny on the course.

And saying that because I played and Andrews in Scotland right oh and yeah for my fortieth birds, I have got a round at Saint Andrews. So I did Edum Refringe Festival and then my only day officers for the only day didn't rain and I went up there and that's the day that I was booked in to play around.

First woman to ever get kicked off, Sir Andrews, and what I liked as well as that they were seeming like she's amazing at golf.

And then someone goes, do you know that?

Was was speaking of arguments. So I was watching something on Instagram the other day about having an argument with your partner partner as in bookmarking the argument.

Can you explain that to everyone?

So, you know, like when you have an argument with your partner. And this is mainly for strike people, because I just don't think the two genders together because we're so different, like and especially when it comes to arguing. Men just want to we just get it over with and women were like to give it our all, like

We're not.

We didn't hold on to it. We were happy in the meantime. We're just bookmarket. And then we found that book again and now we're back. Now it's back, and it doesn't matter that this what we're discussing now happened in nineteen eighty eight. Let's go.

So what I can tell you as well on behalf of men. We think that you guys would probably bookmark the good things as well, like if we do something that will potentially give us some brownie points, but you seem to only use bookmarks for specific.

Things, not because you boys. You boys go out and you think a brownie point is you unpacking the dishwasher and you're like, but unpacked the dishwasher. Yeah, we just did that four hundred times. We're not giving your points for the stuff you're supposed to be doing. Just a foighting in the library right now. Now, Well, everyone listening is gonna go fight for their husbands tonight because of this. And you did this. Yeah, I want you to know you did this. You're just I'm not that cruelty on

Sorry, us women, bookmarking an argument is like, hazy you thinking if your kids stays up late till like ten o'clock, they'll sleep in the next morning.

Hell no, there's a six.

Yeah, they're probably getting up a bit earlier because they've just erupted their streets. And you're like, how is this? Or when you eat more, you run hundred for breakfast?

Breakfast?

Oh, dear Ursula Carson, thank you so much for joining us this morning. Have you been paying attention tonight on the ten network. It is a pleasure as always, have a great day.

Thank you too.

He's what you're waking up to, Adelaide. What's the news to do, Hi Suziness.

Arguably the biggest story of the morning and will probably be of the week. Joe Biden has stepped down in the US presidential race.

Abby, what's the latest? Yees, So it's official.

He put out a statement this morning on his social media basically saying that he's decided to pass the baton, and he endorsed Kamala Harris, who's his vice president, not Pamela as Hazy said last week. So she will be running for the Democratic as the Democratic nominee or she's still got to get nominated. I think the party still have to get behind her. But yeah, she intends to go for the go for the top job. Obviously, world leaders have been reacting. Trump has come out and said

Race, humble is always Donald Trump.

I feel like I know how this all rolled out. So they said, Joe, do you.

Want to continue on? Do you want to be the president.

And it was like in primary school when you had tick a box yes and no.

Right, do you want to be my boyfriend?

Yes or no?

And Joe tick no but meant yes and just got himself confused.

That's classic Joe.

So that was the final straw.

I'm looking forward to when he addresses a nation to talk about what just happened and he's facing the wrong way and the microphones hitting him in the back of the head and they've just got a sort of weer him around one hundred and eighty degrees go for Joey B.

Yeah, I feel like this was inevitable, don't you.

Oh?

I think so.

And I think he's been ICA for COVID and maybe in that time they've been able to actually talk some sense into him and say, hey, I think it's time.

What are her numbers like? Kamala?

Apparently she doesn't have a very big following. She's not very well liked from what I can sort of read and see online. But we'll wait and see what happens at the nominations.

Okay, just up seven o'clock as well. We will cross over to the US. The US corresponded by Channel seven. It is all happening, and that's internationally. What're about locally?

Oh my fair goodness, what a weekend for the Adelaide Thunderbirds if you don't mind.

They put on a school holiday clinic.

Areach during school holiday.

Yes, so true mate.

They took on the Vixen's on the weekend and it was pretty much all over by quarter time. So they won by about twenty five goals in the end, and it was just they are a formidable force. This side is so good. It is their Grand Final to lose. So what that means is the Fever one. Yesterday they beat Sunshine Coast which is good because Sunshine Coast the only team that has pushed the thunder Birds in in recent times. So Sunshine Coast are out and the Vixens

And in terms, Senate, does that all make sense to you?

And the old week off before the Grand Final is never dangerous topic.

We had a lot of them, did you Yeah?

Essentially because you were so good you went straight through, straight.

Through and then we'll get the week off and then we'd always get the lecture from Royers like make sure you behave yourself. Yeah yeah, that's just seven couple of beers, and we'd always have a thousand because there was always.

The a for Grand Final. Yeah right for Grand Final played the week after? Yeah, okay, I remember one time the Twins. I think the twins Chris and James gotten a file with each other after a few too many beers and Crystal James broke his son. Yeah right the week before.

Okay, well did he still play?

Still play?

Well? Okay, this is this is women's sport. So I can't see Shamira Stirling having too many lines and.

Looked at him.

Plunging on in the week off before the Grand final happens, No, it doesn't. It only happens to boys. Women are infinitely more mature in this space. So to say that I'm writing on a back to back premiership for the Thunderbers it's a massive understatement, but well done.

To the girls. It was absolutely epic. It was sellout.

I think they had seven thousand down there at the Attelae thirty six is arena and they will pack out the Grand Final.

I'm pretty sure.

Tickets will go on sale today to members, but I will get some information get.

Back to you on that one very good six eleven. That is your post to snooze news. Have you ever found yourself I was sitting there really worrying about something, like so much so that you get something to quite a panic and then it just turns out that it's completely fine.

Yeah, I'm the mistress of catastrophizing.

Honestly, I do it all the time. I go from nought to one hundred.

Most of us are.

I think like we sit in there and realized it just me that goes like this and goes about our things. But I think a lot of us really really dramatize everything in our lives. A study by the University of California delved into the prevalent i've imagined worries never coming to fruition. So participants documented their anxieties over time and later identified which concerns became reality. Surprisingly, or maybe not so surprisingly, eighty five percent of these worries never materialized.

In eighty five Yeah, it's not ridiculous.

And also I think further studies have shown that even if it did come to fruition, what you were worried about you handle it way better than you thought you could well.

Spot on Joe, just like you've already read this article before I read it out.

I actually haven't. I wrote it. I do thesis as now.

Actually the lecture at the University of California with the fifteen percent that did, seventy nine percent of people found they managed the situations better than expected or learned it valuable lessons from the experience.

I promise you I didn't read did you go?

What makes sense? Doesn't it for me? I'll tell you what.

If I even say the sight of a slight freckle bang cancer cancer an aggressive form.

Of skin cancer.

If one gets itchy on the oh no.

What's going on and then you start planning your funeral, she's even worse. When I was playing footy, the worst was I U like the slight even a tickle anywhere near the groin area. Bang ostiartists pubis now what groin surgery out for six months?

I thought you were going to say bang infertile, which would be worse than osti artists pupia.

Bang osteotists ingrown here.

And you'd spend days and days to days picking that thing out, yeah, out.

And then looking at myself in the mirror pane. Why producers are.

Yeah, I do this a lot too, Joe's I'm terrible for it in most cases most days.

But the big one.

For me recently on my European trip was that I fully convinced myself that I was in the next Taken movie in almost any given situation. So if I was in a bar and a good looking man you know, it's a hello and offered to buy me a drink, I'm in a sex trafficking and that's it.

I'm ding who's the man in your life that plays role at Lemnesson? Chris? Give it?

What do you mean?

Look, I will find you give her back? Now, we're not gonna do that.

You produce it. Georgia field him when you're away, she's yeah, So there you go.

Eighty five percent. That's an alarming statistic, but it's actually quite a nice statistic.

One the other day, so my husband, so we have a place down at Middleton, and so he ducked off down there because we have to clean it because we a B and B it, And so he went down there and I was trying to call him, and it was over something innocuous and little. But when he didn't answer the first couple of times, I've gone, oh my god, he's crashed his car.

Something's happened. So I kept calling and calling and calling.

Little did I know he'd snuck off nine holes with his father in law at Mount Compass.

Did go greggy?

Yeah, And then you wonder if he hasn't had a heart attack or something on the golf call because he's too relaxed.

Yeah, for some reason, that's true.

Question for you, are you're allowed to have mobile phones on a golf course? Because he just doesn't seem to answer his win, he must have had it on vibrates.

Oh okay, so there you go.

That thing was blowing up in his pocket.

So I don't know, you're going to be fine. Eighty five percent of the fifteen percent that are buggered. You got Joe Biden? Of course, yes, I mean it is going badly.

Yeah.

And also Jade's eyeball.

Oh that's going real badly.

Yeah.

So Joe's your eyeballs and that fifteen percent, I'm sorry.

I ball's got very valid concerns.

Maybe maybe that's why he stayed away so long on the golf course.

You should be. Yeah, why would he come home to this? Now, that's a job.

That's a joke, that's a job.

Job, that's a terrible job.

Sometimes when things are sort of crashing around, you're like that are on Friday, you think, gosh, we need some leadership.

We just need a little bit of humor to lighten the mood in his global catastrophe.

And that's when you read Abbey steps up a good morning.

Lo are we they're going very well?

How are you going?

Yeah?

Thanks? Excellent new nails?

I see No, okay, cool nail chair.

No, I got this done for my friend's baby. Shaw. I wanted to be in the theme, jungle theme. So anyway, moving on you Saturdy Joe's oh and you?

I yeah, do you know what I went?

Do you know what?

I looked at her and I went, no, I'm not going to do it. It's a Monday. Let's not start off on the wrong force. But you went there that band aid off.

Just let me know when we're done and the humor starts. Oh, good one.

I'll give it off. You guys don't mind, sure, let's go. Okay, Can I ask you this question? Why was sixty nine afraid of seventy because they had a fight and seventy one. Penny good, Panny, I get to do that. Yeah, okay, I don't know if you get it.

Get it like I get the seventies more and sixty nine.

But anyway, six seventy I had a fight, and seventy one, as in like SEVENY won the five, but it's actually seventy one.

It's just a crap joke, you go, joke. I was.

I was at the pub on the weekend. Of course you were, and no I wasn't. I'm doing drug to luck anyway, very on brand for you, and a bossy man walked into the bar and many ordered everyone around.

That's a joke.

Sorry to everybody who listens to this expecting good quality. Okay, were ready, yep, all right. I don't know if you guys heard about this, but and you store opened up in Adelaide over the weekend. It's called the Husband's Store. Of course I'm looking for a husband, so I thought, hey, I'll go.

And check it out. There are some rules though.

There's five levels and you can visit each one, but you can't go Once you get to that level, you can't you can't.

Go back down. Okay, okay.

So I went to level one and the sign on the door said the men on this level have a job. I thought, well, that's great, I'm looking for that. But what else is there? There's five levels. Let's go to the top.

Yeah. Level two.

The sign says this level has men who have a job and want kids. All right, that's good, but let's go again. Level three the sign says this man, this has men who have a job, want kids and do the housework.

Amazing.

Hot, stop right there, I thought, nah, come on, I want to go and see what's on level four. Okay, so get to level four. On the sign says this has men who have a job, want kids, to do the housework, and are amazing adult cuddles.

Awesome. I'm glad you went up a little Yeah okay.

So of course curiosity got better of me and I thought, nash stuff, and I'm going to go to level five.

Yep, So get there.

On the sign says, hello, you're the thirty one million visitor this floor. This floor has no men and only exist to prove that women are impossible to please. So I left my husband store without her husband.

Yeah, and that was your weekend.

Yes, that's my weekend.

All right, that's Monday morning, Joko. For you think you can do better, we'll text us through for double nine nine on nine.

Coincidentally, Nova's on level three and we're not on level four because that's the level for guys who are good at adult cut.

Off if we don't know how to get to a level five.

Tom Rens on Level.

A.

Very good morning to you, David Woywood from Channel seven.

How are you, good morning, guys, I'm good, I'm good.

Welcome back to the show. It's not fits in, it's Jodie and Hazy. Just to clarify.

On that point, how is that Joe Biden has now gone no more of those gaps?

Yes, exactly, so you are alive at the White House this morning, Okay, tell us everything.

So what pushed him over the edge, so.

To speak, It's sort of just got too much for Joe Biden in the end, It sort of became pretty untenable with him whole it out in his quite defined way that he was. We'd heard, obviously from all of those very influential Democratic players, including former President Obama. We'd heard from the Clinton The congressional support was quickly drying

Just to quick on, David, does Joe Biden know that he's pulled out of the race or if someone had to sit down and explain it very carefully to him.

I mean, all that stuff with Joe Biden, it's pretty tough, isn't it. Like he had a fair few clangers in public, and he was doing a little bit of damage to his legacy as well. So yeah, he's come to that decision. His team has come to that decision, and we know that he upbreaks with a very small group of advisors. A lot of them are family as well, so they've all come to that realization state.

So Dova, I'm just trying. I'm racking my brain.

I don't think there could be a more awkward situation on this planet in recent history then calling Zelenski putin, Okay, can you think of a more awkward situation?

It was startling, wasn't it? And that was in many ways. I mean we saw the debate performance where you could sort of explain it away a little bit. The pressure was on and he made those clangers. That's what in many ways fielded. I mean, people were like, we can't have this in the White House now, and a lot of people within his own party agreed with that.

A statement from Donald Trump this morning, Joe Biden was not fit to run for president and is certainly not fit to serve and never was. He only attained the position of president by lives fake news and not leaving his basement.

Strong words there from Donald Trump.

Yeah, very humble.

Yeah, yeah, pretty on brand as well as so, Yeah, he's come out swinging old Donald's come out singing at this ticket. Look, it's not there's a real chance here here that, as we say, could really inject a little

Now, David, I know we've got to let you go, but very quickly, is Kamala Harris is if she is in fact the nominee, is she capable of being president of the United States?

Yeah, definitely, definitely. She's a prosecutor, She's a formidable debate It would be really interesting to see her go up against Donald Trump they get that chance for a debate. Like, she's no slout, She'll she'll hit back in a way that Joe Biden kind of didn't. He sort of took a few of those hits and didn't really fire back. He wasn't that combat politician. She's much more in that brand, So it'd be a very interesting matchup.

David Worward from Channel seven may thank you so much for your time and also well done in advance. We've been watching you on the screens. It seems like I don't know, every two to three minutes in the States, I don't know when you sleep.

But Job and David, some of the girls, some of the girls here who are very concerned for your welfare because we're big fans here at Nobucks.

We're all of it. God producers always very excited enough about they're all a bit like God.

That poor man, he just needs a rest. He's working so hard.

I know, I agree. Can you right to Channel seven or something? And well, you know it's just being the cash dowt carrying the shelves.

Thank you so much, mate. Hopefully we're chat again very soon.

And we thought we couldn't love him anymore. Look at that. He's funny too.

Oh what a perfect man he is. Seven to fifty five. Come up next, let's go through Jody and Hazesy's most awesome coffee, the race at the top, top three, Oh tight, little battle special day Jode's.

I mean, don't take him personally, kids, but.

So, oh man, is it okay? Thirteen twenty four ten? Is anyone else full the way I do at the moment?

Because school holiday has got me good this time around.

And to look at you as well, you're beating up Jodie's right eyeball was almost exploded. She's got that red thing going on again where you've popped a blood vessel.

And that's just the pressure for the kids.

That's a physical sign that the school holidays have destroyed me this time around.

So it got to yesterday's final.

Day of the school holidays, except for the twelve year old who had an extra week, right, so she's had three weeks off and then she's got today off as well.

That's good, isn't it?

But public schools.

Go back today and it's about damn time, thanks Leslo, because yesterday I could I could just feel I could just feel fourteen days, twenty one days actually of pressure, building and building and building, and the kids could see me getting more and more agitated, and I boiled over in coals.

I boiled over in the sources.

I lot coals really, yeah, whilst listening to Coals Radio.

Yeah, unbelievable scenes because sorry, So what you're saying is that it's your I is actually tomato sauce.

You just got Toto sauce in yaye. Yeah. Yeah.

So there was probably about a eighteen minute build up where I'd said to the kids, guys, I after weeks and weeks of you guys fighting and you guys winging, and you guys demanding money to go and do things and just the sibling carry on, it was like, guys, Mum's about to lose it. So there's a warning. So I'm trying to reason with you here. Do you want to persevere with this behavior and see your mum lose her down? Mind, it's up to you.

Keep poking, keep poking. Guess what dog's gonna buy. It happens.

It happens, and the dog bit and I let it with the biggest guys for Bleach's sake, in the middle of Coals at the Avenues, and I swear to god, twenty seven people heard me. And I was like, so, anyway, back to school, kids are back to school so mum can resume her rational behavior.

Just trying to collect yourself. You've got to collect yourself from here, because how many people do you reckon? So you did anyone sort of turn around? What's going on?

Couple down the end of the arm.

How many people do you reckon? Heard and was like, I know exactly what's happening here. I'm just going to keep on looking straight ahead. I don't want to make eye contact, yeah, because she might bite my head off.

Yes, exactly, but today marks the first day and the final child to enter primary school for the five year old Harperotti.

That's a little MIDI year intake.

It is, yes, So it's something that the government brought in. I reckon at the end of last year where the said we're doing midia intakes now, so basically your four and a half year old can go to school now.

And I was listening to Abby in the newsroom before.

So it depends on their age, their maturity and their emotional intelligence.

And I was like, oh good, and what.

Else because this is a kid that doesn't want to go to the toilet by herself, and up till a couple of weeks ago.

Still like the night dummy. So let's see how she rolls.

Oh my gosh, she'd really shifted off early, despite all of genuine warning signs not to.

I know.

So we'll see how we go. But very very exciting. I can't be there this morning. But Harper, you are a big girl, you're a brave girl, and this is your moment. And she's been looking forward to it for so long, sitting.

There riding go Well, what's she talking about?

Well?

Where are we going?

Dad?

Let's go on