Is Hayesy Secretly Moonlighting As Premier Peter Malinauskas?

Gate, Ben Leamon Bell.

The new sound of No the Mornings in twenty twenty three is Early Breakfast.

There's Ben Lemon Bell from six AM and Jody and Hazy from seven.

You guys are great, great, quite bearable Jody and Hazy.

It's the new sound of nover in twenty twenty three.

What an absolute pleasure it is to meet you.

And if you've come back for another helping, well then hopefully we keep you nice and full. But if it is your first time, jeez, we've got a feast for you.

Yeah, we sure do today.

But just before we get into what's on the menu, Hazy. News reader Abby just mentioned that Smith Chips are teaming up with Subway, Red Rooster and Mad Mix. I need more information on this story, are we like? I mean, what sort of subway are they going?

Like your meat ball? Your chicken? Terry archyta you to mayonnaise? What followful meatball?

So it's meatball Subway, it's hot sauce, Mad Max, and then it's fried chicken burger, Red Rooster.

Interested people, I think?

So I say we try like we're gonna have to mortgage our homes to get packets though, because there's a chip or there's a potato shortage.

Potatoes left. Yeah, that's very interesting, what a development overnight.

We'll keep an eye on this one for you chip enthusias out there. Probably a little bit flat at the minutes.

I've got a good cheesy story coming up later, so hold your hats for that one cheesy story.

All the flavors this morning, Abs, We're all about the cheese.

Twenty four degrees across Adelaide this morning, which is nice at all. Welcome change last a few days, so it's really really cool now it's calmed down.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I rode.

My bike in this morning in the spirit of the tool down under and a few drops of rain around yes overnight and this morning.

Just to play a picture as well. The most the girliest bike I've ever seen on the planet. I didn't know that a mature age woman could ride a bike which was almost hot pink and also has a basket at the front stop it.

It's a retro bike.

It's not hot pink, it's rose gold. It has a very very functional basket on the top. And also it has a maximum speed about six ks.

Now it does.

And you wrote off yesterday it looked like you're an extra from the sound of music, That's what I thought was going on.

Speaking of our cycling tdu is on today.

Yesterday wrapped up the women's T too so Grace Brown, congratulations to her. Yep, today's in Tonando. The boys just from Tonanda to Tonanda little one hundred and fifty four k loop which I didn't think it took that long to get from the bakery to the thch.

Oh Me either. I thought that was a good three minute walk. Apparently not. She's a big loop of toandall.

Though.

Sometimes if you have been at TCH for a good solid session and you try to get to the bakery and you go the wrong way, could take you one hundred and fifty four plumbers, but somehow you still find yourself getting there.

You speak from experience.

Our big show coming up second date update, we confront a guy who ghosted a girl. We want to find out why she wants answers, so do we. We also have a segment called ask us Anything, where you can get involved at breakfast at over nine one nine dot com dot au or exits for doublelo nine one nine nine one nine.

You can ask us any question you like.

Nothing is off limits.

And we're contractually obliged to answer. Apparently, Hazy, the listeners of Adelaide are getting to know you because you've pretty much the new FM kid on the block, which is great because you're awesome and I know everyone's going to love you. But I have received this text message four doublow nine nine nine one nine please give us feedback anytime.

And it's from Scott.

Now, Scott has a theory about you and another high profile person in Adelaide, and he joins us on the line because I want to let him tell you what his theory is.

Good morning, Scotty, Yes, good morning, go for it. Tell Hazy what you think.

Well, I think that he is duping the South Australian public and I think he is, in fact the premier Peter malanawskis in disguise.

Oh you know which way? Yes, duping the public?

Yeah probably yes, Wow, it adds up.

I mean they you know, they both play guy playing footy, they both like getting their shirt off, you know, they both got smooth, deep voices. I think this is all about, you know, a premier needing to have a bit more input, and so he's invented Hazy as a character so he can be on the radio more often.

What you're saying to Scotty is that you don't, in fact believe that Andrew Hayes is a real person, That it's actually Peter.

Melanowskis absolutely I mean, and anyone ever seen them in the same room together at the same time, Very very true.

What about Maleley just having a double life though as well his wife at home, he's also married to Kara.

He's got several kids everywhere us.

I think we're under something here, and I think it's time that Hazy was out there that he is actually the premier.

I do. There is one hole in your theory that I'd like to address, Scotty, because Peter madelanowskis one of these men is very adept at making executive decisions and running the state and controlling the purses.

The other one is Andrew Hayes.

Yeah, okay, okay, I wanted to work on my theory, but you can see where I'm going with it.

Well, we need to debunk this theory. So give us a couple of days, Scotti, and we'll see if we can get the PM in the same room as myself. But in the meantime, I am actually the premier, so you're right, and what I can announce is in twenty twenty five, Adelaide will host a Super Bowl.

Fantastic.

I'm in and your lack of political now was really exposed then when you said I am the PM.

Will thinking story of how.

Several scenes is huge.

I'm so abnormally excited about this story because the dreamy Italian villa from the White Lotus is available to rent on Airbnb.

You haven't seen it, but that's the theme.

I was about to say. This doesn't make a whole lot of sense to me that it's poppy. It's not a certified bang yet an over boy is not going to be playing. It's not that you.

Can now experience the Sicilian setting for yourself, as the stunning villa where friend of mees Harper and Daphne stay for one evening is available to rent on AIRB and B. I think they got high from memory the night they spent together in this villa. There you go, are going to cost you, though eight seven hundred and eighty dollars and forty one Australian dollars per night.

That it want to be a memorable night.

It would want to be.

Now, what is disappointed me greatly is you're the only man on the planet who hasn't watched White Lotus. You're the only human on the planet that hasn't watched that show. When are you going to watch it?

I feel so alone?

You are alone?

Can I say that I'll watch it within the next forty six months?

How I'm I supposed to have conversations with you if you won't watch it?

What's it on too? By the way, is it on Netflix?

Binge?

Don't have Binge?

Okay?

Sorry, God, you'd like it.

You're like a streaming service, Pariah.

Is it on ko? I don't have it?

No.

Madonna has wiped her Instagram and announced a career spanning Greatest Hits.

Tour's still looking good, Madonna.

I'm not sure about her.

She's sixty four. I'm curious about.

Madonna because she still seems to want to sexualize herself instead of saying, like, look how hot I am in my mid sixties without just going you know what I am?

Who I am.

I'm sorry for me. It's all about personality. Don't see age or number or looks or anything like that.

But that's okay. I try to look deep within someone's soul.

Anyway, her tour, and she's going to perform all the hits, Thank goodness. She's not going to get on stage and go, Hello, I'm Madonna. I'm going to play my new stuff for you this evening.

That can be frustrating.

You think when you see an ageless artist who's been so good throughout the journal, they here's some new stuff. I wouldn't see you too, And they played their new stuff for the first half an hour and we almost left.

Yes, I know you just got people at the back. Guy, Why are like a brat?

For God's sake.

The tour is going to kick off in Canada in July, and then New York, Barcelona, Paris and Stockholm before it wraps in Amsterdam on the first of December.

I don't know why I've just done that story now because I realize she's not coming to Australia.

That's all right.

What was the point of the last forty five seconds?

Well, it's Madonna.

What does the dump button takes off about eight seconds, so we're still going to get half that Madonna chat even if I press the dump button.

Let's push on.

The presence of the Russian flag in the stands at the OS Open, has prompted organizers to ban them from Melbourne Park so you could see the flag on court fourteen during a match.

Between Okay, here we go.

This is this is newsreader Abbey's revenge on me right now, Ukraine's Katarina vandal and Russian Camilla wreckimm over over.

Yes, you just got to stay with confidence.

Isn't that right, Abby, Like you've just had fast sake confidently. Yeah, that's right, because it's worked for you.

Finebasa, I'm getting better.

I'm getting better today. I haven't stuffed up yet.

Okay, this is the Ukrainian ambassador talking about the presence of Russian flags at the tennis.

I welcome the decision of Australian Open to ban Russian flags at a display. More so, I really want to encourage Tennis Australia to increase the security because I was told that yesterday those spectators who are not just only displaying the Russian flag, they've been actually mocking the Ukrainian tennis player Katarina and distracting her from the game. I want to make sure that doesn't happen again.

Yes, that is absolutely not.

On Murky waters when you're mixing sport and politics, isn't it. That's why we'll move on at this point, won't we?

Hazy very good?

Let's seamlessly move on to the Bachelor, shall we? Because it seems like a stock standard transition.

It does.

I mean, how many times in your life have your segued from the Warren, Russia and Ukraine to the Bachelor?

Now this is big.

Apparently several batchy stars have already lost their five K bonus for breaching contracts, so they obviously they have gone onto the Bachelor for Instagram fame or money or both, but some have already been stripped of their privileges for breaching their contract. That aside a big WTF from me last night watching The Bachelor? Since when do we have partners on the outside and since when do those partners

I hope you're open to a little threesome action a little down the track. Have I listen, if you and I were to get end up together, I would.

Still really appreciate being able to maintain contact.

Review you.

How far does that contact go?

Is that a texting relationship I would assume, not a sexual relationship.

I'm still questioning the whole I can people be together sexually with one another forever and ever till death to us part? Like if you and I get married, and I'm like, I want to spice things up in the bedroom Damien from ten years ago, we all joined the bedroom together because I am a sexual person.

Wow, Wi, what a really different way to say.

Can I just go with whoever I want at any stage and you not judge me for it?

She was essentially saying, can we have an open relationship?

That's what she was saying. So I want to put this to you, Hazy.

Your beautiful wife Kara comes to you after ten years and goes, she's bored you are boring?

He who told you? Sorryay, it's about you six or seven?

Oh boy, I'm so bored.

My boyfriend from back in the day would like to ingratiate himself into the scenario. Would you be open despicing things up in that fashion? And if so, who would you choose? She goes funky free choice, hazy, it's up you. Who do you want?

Thank? I think you go with two or three boyfriends.

But in terms of keeping it spicy, I sure come over, bring your best beef Vinderloo and let's have a really really spicy meal together.

We'll keep it real and answer the question who would it be?

It would have to be somebody who's and I have to check with some of the ex boyfriend, someone who's a very very small in stature.

Right, if you know what I mean?

So ready, Tom Red actually may be ready.

It's not too late for a cheeky summer break.

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What if it's Ozzie for trouble, a little duck you tell me you bt the time machine.

On this day yep, Wednesday, eighteenth of January. Let's go for a little trip down memory lane. We'll start in nineteen eighty Jades Jason Seagull is born. Today's his forty third birthday. He is best known for his roles and How I Met Your Mother, Forgetting Sarah Marshall and I Love you man.

He is so funny.

Jason Siegel.

Yeah, I don't know you're thinking of Steven Sigar.

I am, yes, I am.

Very very different action hero Jason Siegel, Steven Sigal, Oh my god, to opposite ends.

Okay, Barty's responding really a lot of the pregnancy. It's amazing how fast the knocker at as you says.

Nineteen ninety five Yahoo dot com domain was created, and then of course Yahoo went on to become the son of Google. Not really, but Google really son yahooed, isn't it? It is still Lay's claimship over Bing. I think it is bing Bing.

If you ever went to Bing, as you'll go to like default Internet Explorer, you're a loser.

Oh my gosh, you'd be like, hey Bing, give me photos of Lebron James and I go. Here you go, Here's Steph Curry. Whatever, take that. I don't care. Thanks Being ninety seven, borge Uselin becomes the first person across Antarctica alone and unaided that the Norwegian Polar Explorer walked three thousand kilometers across hers southernmost continent.

It's a lonely walk.

I don't think Borch has got enough credit for that because he's not a household name.

But that's a good fish.

And my next kit we call Borge Little Borge Hays.

Hey, when you're four, you're going to walk across Antarctica, Borch.

Don't hit your sister.

Nineteen ninety eight, fifty fifth Golden Globes Titanic wins Best Picture.

Okay, yeah, we all know as well. Jack could have survived.

I Rose is like literally rescue boats everywhere. I've got to let you go, Jack, just pull him up. It's fine.

There's been enough debate about this. There's room enough for two.

Two thousand and eight, the United Nations announced George Clooney as a UN Messenger of Peace because he's pretty perfect. Isn't the only George sal and Pepper sexy? We get it.

It's flawless married to the world's most perfect woman, like not only stunning, like supermodel stunning, but also next level smart, Beta is perfect. Those women don't exist.

You're not real iman.

In George MARRIEDI twenty eighteen, Brazilian surfer Mayer Gabira rides the largest ever wave by a female surfer at twenty point seventy two meters in Portugal.

WHOA, that's pretty much schmee down at Middleton most weekends.

Not Chris Big is the big Wedgy. It's still pretty intense. And then I went someone in January eighteenth. In twenty twelve was We Found Love by Rihanna featuring Calvin.

Harris, A certified bank, get into It, Jodi and Hazy, good money as done Smart, what is.

The Tata probat.

The blackcase, will you.

Will do? The bacas, the will.

To think that, the stops to start, stops to.

Start journey and hazes ask us anything, you know what, nothing's off limits because we're trying to get to know you.

You guys are trying to get to know us. So the best way to know somebody is just to ask. And the most deepest intimate secrets of all time. And you just got to be honest.

A little edgie about this segment. I bet you are never quite know what's going to come at me.

There's a few demons in the closet.

More than a few mates it's full of demons.

City of demons.

It's like demon is the name of the.

City, Pneumonia. It's a population.

Seven thousand and six ninety and they all live in my head.

Oh wait, let's meet a few of those demons. Produce you shore on. Good morning, good morning.

Ah.

The phones have been going off with questions for you.

To amazing great. Did you bet them more? You just gone through it?

Oh no, I just went straight for it.

Of course you did.

No, can't vet them. The listeners want what they want. Okay, okay, our first question, what would your final death row meal be?

Oh?

Okay?

Well, as a general rule, I haven't had carbs since nineteen ninety two, so I probably really hit myself up with some sort of seafood linguine number with the creamy sauce. Yes, go out, die, Jody, you're happy and your tummy's.

Full, well belly, I'm gonna go straight to the top shelf. I'm gonna say Barnacle bills.

I'm just kiddy.

But what I want to do is because I literally want to go out with the bang. I want it to be the biggest meal of all time and something that's really really explosive, that when you put some electricity through me, I might pop and make a big old mess.

So I want a big chicken carry thanks. Oh no, sound good?

Both sound good?

Okay?

Question two, what's the first South Australian street that you've ever lived in?

Oh, I'm going to say, I think Saint Alban's Drive. I think was it? No?

No?

We a, Oh that's right.

No, it's an Norman's Drive. I live next door to Garrier's. Really yeah, yeah, And I thought this would be good because I was a sports reborterer. I thought I'll get some real scoops here gas Gabby Donuts. Yeah, I can't remember the name of it, but it was next to.

The mental health hospital and Burnside's all.

That's convenient.

Oh there's that girl who lives in pneumonia. This is a good chicken pop over.

She was.

Oh look, she's just doing laps of the street again, clearly crunching some numbers and talking to her own demons, all seven.

Million of them.

Well what about you?

I got Way Avenue and Broadview.

Oh nice, Yes, that's top shelf next to the beach.

I'll be honest with you. Don't worry. They're not one beautiful house.

Okay, he's the worst house on the best street. Is that what you would do it?

We've had a pretty ordinary one, a good spot.

They right, So this is where Central District's actually put me with another bloke. It was somebody else's rental house and they put us in there because it's halfway in between. Obviously the city is closer, but then you're about twenty five minutes from the Ponderosa.

Yeah. Also the grand close proximity.

I'm going to say we're more Oxford type operators. And then the Line hotel on the Sunday.

Oh right, okay, you had a real system.

You gave that a atch once or twice? All right?

Question number three, what is your best and least favorite attribute?

Okay, oh okay, my well, okay, I've had four children, So my least favorite attribute is my stomach.

And I shouldn't be like that. I should be positive body image Bush, that's just being honest. My favorite attribute I'm not. I think I'm kind, Okay, I think I'm a nice person.

So is it purely physical or attribute in general?

So it could be something general, right, it's probably shows you my personality. I purely went for physical traits. Worst attribute I had my years. I've got massive years. Yeah, big old wingings. You can't see hi because I got headphones on. I wear headphones all the time like an over boy, just to keep and covered up.

I hear everything, though.

I've never noticed your ears. And that's hand on my heart.

Okay, there you go, now you will. What do you think my favorite attribute is physical cars? Is that easy?

There's a flute.

I wear shorts three out of sixty three ound sixty five plus a few more days a year.

And they're not lying.

First I met you. That's all you want to do is check out my car.

And I was like, hey, hey, Sean, check this out.

Least bad boys, bad boys full However they look good.

In question number four, and have you ever been caught in public naked?

Okay? Can I kick things off here? You know, mim?

Yes, when I was eighteen or nineteen, there was a very very prominent movie doing the Rounds. This is when we lived in Sydney, starring a rat pack, most notably Will Ferrell in this particular scene. So we've got we've got streaking to the quad and the gymnasium got every day snoop.

And I'm not even joking.

So we we were streaking in a part of Sydney where and I actually got caught by policeman and we're very nice policeman. He was nice to us and explained exactly what was happening. That may have since a few days ago. I'm actually obsessed with it. We just thought this would be funny, and he said, right, I go home right now, immediately.

Right, and it was it and you got off, didn't get arrested.

You.

Maybe he wasn't that impressed with what he saw on.

He felt sorry for me, for goodness sake. If I was, you'll be wearing our pants and then pants over the top.

Have I been caught naked in public? Answer to that question is yes, twice twice. The first time we were my husband and I had a weekend away from the kids.

So we were in a hotel room in Melbourne.

And as you do when it's just mummy and daddy.

You tend to wear a lot of clothes around your hotel room.

So at the moment that I opened up the curtains and greeted a window washer, his surprise.

And my surprise, So that's genuine. Was the proper eye contact, proper eye contact.

He started laughing the same thing as the policeman with you.

So he looked you up and down and started laughing, and it said go home, shut your curtains.

So that was the first one.

The second one was at a function at the convention Center and.

It was the Port Adelaide.

I'm going to say best and fairest or it was a function for Port Adelaide.

And now you're going to get into the story that you got nude there is.

Interesting, unfortunately, and it's my greatest fear.

They have those sliding door toilets Mention Center.

So it wasn't full nude, but I was definitely sitting on a toilet when the door opened, because someone opened it from the outside, because I clearly didn't read the brief and lock it from the inside as a group of players walk past.

And why, oh my god, to share the toilet.

I do, I'm not going to say, because I don't want to embarif him. Wow, okay, yes, And so that has instilled a few of me of those any toilet door that opens, like for example, to a restaurant, I'm not about it.

I'm so terrified and anxious, now do you know what I mean?

Yeah, do you know what the ones are? You see around the park. Sometimes there's one on Queen Street, which sometimes I use the excel loose. Yeah, door is opening, and sometimes you'll have a bit of a sit because you need to and you're like, any second now it's going to say door is opening, and.

You expose to the world.

I have to scare the shit out of you, isn't it.

Daddy's tough.

It's not easy yet there it's ruthless, and you know the toughest thing about it, all this trying to read the opposition and when not say opposition, I mean the person you're trying to impress.

I don't want to sound obnoxious, but I am so happy on marriage. I'm so glad I'm happily married and I don't have to navigate these shark infested dating waters.

That's horrible, It's really horrible.

Yeah, it's a gong show out there.

Let's go to gem in Howard Cove. Jemmy, good moring to you.

Good morning guys.

Here you going good, Jemma, tell us what's going on in your love life?

Dar Well, I'm going to name him Channing straight away, he's O Patrick. And we went on this date at the beach and he seems really keen. We went and got like broken yogurt from Yachi and chatteded for ages, and we had been talking like two weeks prior to that, so you know, we kind of aready, knew a little bit about about each other anyway, and then yes, there were chatting for ages at yoa Chi, and then he dropped me home and we were laughing so much and then we had a bit of a cheeky peck at

Hey, Jimmy, did you did you go for the top shof though, Like, just a few minutes after you texted him, did you respond with another text saying why haven't you written back?

Kid?

No, I didn't go to that far, but I did message a few more times.

So okay.

My first instinct here is just maybe pulled back a little of the messaging just to.

Touch Yeah, right, okay, maybe I'll do that with them. Oh maybe he'll try and get him back by replying. No, I won't reply.

It sounds like you're racking your brain to find different avenues to try and get in contact with him.

Don't do that, Okay, I'm not gonna work with it.

Also, I just want to check for another Yoachi red flag. Did he fill it to the brim and then proceed to just put a real mixture of fruit Lolly's chocolate the whole works, because that is a sign of a psychopath.

Was Boys and Berry involved?

Yeah, you're probably right, guys. It was filled to the brim and had every single topic you could imagine.

And then let me guess he put it on the scales and let you pay for it.

No, he paid, But yeah, I'm going to make look, make him look back to psycho. He filled it all the way to the bread Man. It was awful, absolutely awful.

It's it's still not good enough. No, yeah, it's not good enough.

So if they've had a pash, yeah, so you said.

It was a sensuous peck? Was it a pash for a peck?

Uh?

I don't want to give the absolutely ruined it for us.

So they they macked on, as I think the kids say these days.

Let's just say I thought he was interested afterwards.

So, okay, Jemma, would you like us to do your dirty work for you?

When I say us, I mean Hazy.

Do you want him to call him man to man and find out exactly what's gone down here?

I wouldn't love to. I wouldn't love to.

Find out what go is. Hazy's face says. I was hoping she'd say not.

I was going to follow it up with plenty more fish in this sage, Jemma.

She likes this particular brand of barrel.

Mundy.

You like Patty the Baddie, don't you.

Yeah, we need justice for Jemma.

So we've actually got hold of Patrick from so before he joins us this morning.

Oh, good morning, Patty, good morning, Jody and Hazy.

Okay, there's always two sides to a story.

Before I judge you and think you're a horrible ghoster, tell us what happened.

Well, I mean the.

Date was great, Jem's amazing, but I.

Found out afterwards that she'd actually slept with one of my mates club.

The tables have turned.

Andrew Hayes, longtime member of the Central District Football Club. Yes, that's familiar with this little tale.

Well, I mean we're very, very tired group with the dog is back of the day. No, I'm just kidding. This absolutely throws into this ray. Yes, because they're close mates and mature adult should be able to look past that, but unfortunately, your males full of testosterone and sometimes little things like this can get in the way.

It sounds ridiculous.

I know, Patrick, don't If you really liked Jemma, couldn't you overlook the fact that she's been with one of your footy mates.

But it's the bro Coe Jody.

You can't do that.

Yeah, I see exactly the line that's Patrick's calendar.

Doesn't love win, doesn't love win?

I mean love love It's been one day.

Okay. As soon as I said, I thought, was she a little heavy handed with the text messaging.

Was she ever?

I think I'm gonna have to change my phone number?

Oh my god. Well he's a twist in this conversation. Thoughts on that, Gemma? No, oh, hello here from you.

Oh I just want to say, just because I've slept with one person that you know, that shouldn't stop our connection if we apparently have that. So yeah, that's my one comment. But yes, we're just gonna have.

To leave it now. Good.

Oh Patrick, can I just say, how did you find out that Jemma had been with your mate?

I can't really discuss what happens in the locker room, Jody, you know that? Oh?

Good, look doesn't it?

Guys?

Yeah, I'm not good at reading cues, but I've got a good feeling about you too. More chances to pick up some Sam Smith tickets. First thing tomorrow.

Yes, also tomorrow, we're going to do a little thing we like to call ask Hazy. So if your kids, I mean, he's guiding the next generation. There's no question about that. He can't guide himself, but he's taken it upon himself to guide children.

Doesn't really work, you would have thought if.

You'd like to get involved.

Breakfast at over nine one nine dot com dot a U R O four double nine one nine is the text line.

Probably need to us set some ground rules as well, some team rules as we go forward.

Yeah. Progress.

So you and I been friends for a long time, but we've only been doing this for a couple of weeks. So it's very important that we set boundaries for ourselves for this to prosper and go forward and.

Thrive because we're tight knit community here at over as well, we might get the listening involved.

Okay, sure some of our little rules and regulations.

You might have rules for us, things that we can and can't do.

Yes, sounds good. Love that I don't forget as well. Maddie Rowe is up next. She's going to take you through your workday. Next opportunity to get yourself in the drawer for novis at free for twenty three.

Yeah, good on you, Maddie.

Good stuff.

It's all good stuff.

Mad I don't figure as well. Jodie and Hazy the podcast have a bit of a listen. We'll catch you bright and early tomorrow morning from seven. Have a fantastic Wednesday.