FULL SHOW | A Parent's Worst Nightmare

Take seven of your coffee, settle into your seat. Good Jody and Hazy Madeale's favorite way awake.

I've been morning to you and welcome to your half day Wednesday. We're going to get to some breaking news in just a moment, but worth mentioning. Novous Red Room invites. We've got a hape to give away this morning before seven o'clock and as it is Wednesday, only a couple up days left to get yourself along to the biggest party Cyril at Fantau at Gluttony Light Friday night.

Can't wait for it, and you believe what that's going to be light because you know jokes, no one really aggressively gets around Friday more than us, oh Man, Jacques, Cyril and Novous Red Room. On top of that, boy, oh boys, watch it out. It could be a genuine.

Explosion climbing off the walls.

Also this morning, Tazzy have unveiled their brand.

New mascot and I can't wait to tell you about it.

Excite for the little appllile.

Yes yeah, there are so many things about this mascot that we need to drill down on, so we will do just that.

While we are in design for breaking news. He said, you've got some big stuff. What's happening.

South Australian Police have just put out a release.

Would you like me to do this in my news.

Voice, in my very make it real basic.

Ready for this?

It is accompanied by a cow on the side of the road with a buckets bucket on It's an al ready okay. At four twenty am, police were called to the Old Princess Highway, Indoorsley after reports of a cow acting suspiciously. The cow was spotted moving along the road in disguise with a bucket over its head to conceal its identity. After a high stakes pursuit, patrols managed to wrangle the bucket off the cow's head. The cow was cautient for wearing an article of disguise and safely returned

All it was worth.

Save. Very clever off to you.

Some of the comments in the comments section utterly disgraceful behavior. Am glad you were able to control the situation.

And it's a milkstree how it got there?

That's good. I love a little punny situation very now.

And then Save goes bang and I've done at.

I've cracked the cigar, put the bottle of champagne out. We did it, guys.

You should see the police media this morning. They are popping bottles left.

Runs, so they should as well. Good stuff. A great way to kick off your Wednesday. You mentioned as well Jade's we need to really knuckle down and take a deep dive into the new mascot for the Tazzy team. Yes, please, because it's setting the standard for mascots.

Is it.

Let's talk about it next on over.

I need to know.

I need to know now, I need to know.

I need to know.

I need to know what News Today knows.

What you need to know, what you need to know With Jody.

And had let me preface this segment by saying, I'm going to be so appointed if you haven't got some sort of Tasmania Devil sound effect.

I'm just going to say that right here, right now.

Okay, go on, we could have workshop this. I'm just not sure what sounded Tazzy Devil makes. It's really aggressive sort of hissing sound.

They grow, Yeah, yeah, it's super aggressive animals. Anyway, I'll give you.

From Tazzy Do you like did you just to man handle Tazzy devils all the time? He used to sleep with them, bloody married mate.

Tasmania has revealed the name and look of its mascot on the first anniversary of the announcement of the new club's name and colors.

So let me describe this thing to you.

And it was they basically did an in credent collaboration with the Terrapin Puppet Theater.

So his name is Roman, okay, right?

Why Roman? What is Roman?

Rubbin's particularly tazzy words.

So like my grandparents used to call me a little Roman and pat me on my head. Okay, So it means like someone slightly little, well, not a rumpy, someone slightly older eccentric.

Oh okay, it's a little Rouman and that's purely a tassy thing.

Yeah, okay.

So Ruman has been made out of its fairies made from recycled school uniforms because they wanted the kids of Tazzy feel like they were a part of it, which is pretty cute. The thing that's unique to Rumman he's got kneepads on because there's a famous oval in Queenstown in Tasmania where it's just gravel.

They play footy on gravel. Really, we've read them tough down there, which is weird.

Do you know the best thing about this? We are learning a lot about Tasmania.

I also visited Queen's Town on my year five jump rope for Heart Tour of Tasmania.

Anyway, that's a little side note. I was a very good skin.

That's a little side flex. Okay.

The thing about the Roman launch yesterday which struck me is what they did is they wanted Rummen to be tough, so they fed Rumman a football, So rumman ate the football.

Roman shout out the football.

Of course, of course you did, because we assume that's what all good Kazzi devils do.

So then he basically turned out and turned around, so the football wenting hole and then it came out disheveled out of its butt.

Right. Okay, what a beautiful omen for the future Dasmanian football tape.

It's amazing though, that amazing.

It's got an odd looking mascot, to be honest, and the brief was just don't scare the children.

And I don't know if she fulfilled that brief, because.

That's all it did was scare the children.

It's a tasty devil shooting in front of them. Of course.

That's The following segment is the mature audiences only and may contain content graphic language and nudity, not that you'll see it's easily offended. Well, you're about to find out just how easily.

Your father's money. If you're just tuning in for the first time, Welcome, what it's time join us. This is the time morning where just a little bit more blue, bit more risky.

Yeah, straight up out of our system before seven o'clock when we have to behave like adults. Yes, not very often.

That came a guy Josh comes into the opposite and says, I've got a naughty at six forty for you.

When when this guy speaks in this space, yeah, everyone just shuts up and listens.

Spake that down.

Shh okay cha, Yeah, I've got some real gross for you.

Okay, there we go.

Okay, So Monday night, right, as you guys know, I go to wrestling training. It's very lame, Yes, very very strange lame.

You're semi professional, part time Monday night wrestle like cool?

Such an uplifting team. Yeah, So I just finished to work out.

We're about to get into the training itself, and I've got this weird smell wafting through.

So I'm checking my pits.

Is it me?

Oh god? Not again.

I sprayed on some deoda and can still smell it.

Tested his breath, which never works. By the way, how do you know?

Check the bottom of my shoes, what is this smell? And confirmed, Okay, it's not me.

Okay, good.

Then we got in the ring and our first warm up was to do three forward rolls in the ring. The guy ahead of me gets into his little forward role position and I see on the back of his pants seeping through.

Is a big brown stain.

Oh my god, classic classic wrestler.

By the way, I had a dollar every time someone pood himself at my wrestling training.

Rich so rich coffees every morning on Joe's.

And so did you say something?

What do you say? The guys in his mid thirties, he's been there for longer than I have.

It's my place to say protocol where you can't really approach some of the scene members of Yeah.

A hierarchy, like a wrestling hierarchy, there absolutely is, And myself as a rookie.

I'm not allowed to speak out against a pro okay, so I just kind of let him train for three hours.

Oh my god.

But I have to say the worst part was he put one of the other trainees, this quite petite girl, in a head scissors with his legs.

Yeah.

So her face was like right there next to the stain, and the second she got out of the move, she got out of the ring straight into the bathroom arms.

Ugh.

Yeah, Joe's that's a classic mud move to their call and the wrestling fraternity.

So I just love, I love that there's this protocol where you can't approach him to senior member of the group. However you can allow him to wrap his poohing legs an ass around some poor girl who has then proceeded to go to the toilets and voment. That's okay, She's the weird, weird.

World, the rest it's a weird will so much so the hierarchy of the resting world that Josh has actually crapped his pants right now, poo stains all over it. A couple of US astronauts about to get back to Earth after longer than expected stint in space.

Sonny Williams and Butch Wilmore are scheduled to be just hours away from a long awaited return to Earth after an incredible nine months in space. So initially they went in June, but they were like eight days guys tops.

Max, guys max, eight days max.

And then nearly ten months later they are making their long awaited return. The thing that sticks with me about this is her hair. For the entire time that they've crossed to them in space, it's been like on an end. So I guess the first thing she'd want to do was get her roots touched up when.

She gets back to Earth, roots thro out of control.

And then maybe just run a gh D through that bad boy.

Absolutely speaking of as well, we'd segue. But do you think that they fell in love?

I don't know.

You know that it is makes me gives me think about that. You know that expression, I would not sleep with you if you were the last person on Earth.

Well, what about in space?

If you're the last person in space?

How do you do it in space?

Great question?

When you cover up the cameras, for a start.

You couldn't get that suit on and off easy.

And when you're floating around as well, it's hard. To get sort of you know, the gravity points. I don't want to get bogged down in details.

Yeah, I mean getting that right on Earth is difficult for you, isn't it.

Thirteen twenty four ten, when if you had in Spain.

So extraordinary things, But you were right about the muscle atrophy because they've been floating around for so long. They've been doing exercise and things in space, but it'll take six weeks worth of rehabilitation to get them back reacclimatized to being back on Earth. The other thing is space food. Can't imagine it'd be that good. Playing food's awful.

Do you remember? Do you remember space sticks when you're a kid? No, the confectionery space sticks. Oh no, it was awful. But their whole marketing campaign was this is what they eat in space. You know, it's not even nice by I meaning because that's what the astronauts eat.

Jeezu fell for some marketing stuff.

My god.

Yeah, so let's do this.

Thirteen twenty fourteen, When did you get stranded somewhere? We'd love to hear from you.

We got a nice early called Philip, Good morning to you, mate, fellow.

I got stranded in the pantry of our house.

Happens there, it happens.

Here's the funny part reason why. At the time we had a dog, a little multi shit through cross called Lucy, was my mum's dog, technically the family dog. But she knew that if you were going into pantry, she would get a tree. So I didn't want to begging. I tried to sneak into the pantry.

Ah, got cha, yeah, yeah yeah.

And so as I'm in the pantry looking for my food, I can hear the little click clack of this rat running towards the pantry door on the aisle. She jumps up and pushes the pantry door shut on me. And there is no handle on the inside of that pantry door. Thankfully though, because I was a teenager at the time, I had my phone with me at all time, so I was able to call my mum, can you please come and let me out? The dodsters trap me.

Was the total time Philip, that you were stuck in the pantry, Oh.

It wouldn't have been ten minutes.

But in that time, because you think that you're trapped, you think, well, this is my life now, yeah, and these are my supplies and I don't have much time land.

Like a little doomsday exercise, isn't it? Well?

Thank you so much, Philip Heye. Would you like an invite for you in three months to go to the Red Room?

Yeah?

Sure, let's do it. Feel very nice. We'll see on Friday night three snakes, Thurturday and twenty four ten, and we won't be stranded, but there'll be fifteen hundred of us. Where were you stranded? Off the back of these astronauts who are finally returning to Worth after what nine almost ten months in space? It was supposed to be eight days?

That's crazy?

Take more cause next Thurday and twenty four ten, give us the bars. Where were you stranded?

Check missus Adelaide's favorite way.

To awaken.

Seven thirty This morning, we're going to randomly call someone. If they answer with I wake up with Jody and Hazy USC called them five hundred bucks. If you want it to be you bridge the details rather than overclafft Joe's thirteen twenty four ten. We're taking calls when and where have you been stranded?

Yeah?

The US astronaut Sunny Williams and Butch Wilmore just since space they were like eight days tops.

Yeah, week and a half, guys, is fine.

Yeah, they have been in space for ten months now.

Okay did we say days we met?

Months?

Yeah, sorry about that.

Yeah.

So they're about to touch down back on Earth. So it just begs the question where did you get stranded?

Hazy?

Just quickly a bit more on that physical stuff. Apparently it's going to take them a week before they can walk.

Again, so that's what aweso as well.

They're not going to get off the space Shuttle and like run to their families. No, absolutely not, sort of almost snap in half.

And also they'll have to be sort of confiss well, you know, quarantined at the space station on Earth for a little while before they can be reintegrated because you can't drive a car for about you know, three four weeks.

Yes, and space aliens and things like that that are running through their systems. Yeah, all of that we've all seen alien.

So we're taking you call. Was this morning, thirteen twenty fourteen, Where did you get stranded? Let's get in Nicoll from mortha Val Good morning, Nicole, where'd you get stranded?

Good morning? I got stranded in Kuala Lum for a week.

Yeah, okay, what happened.

So I was traveling to Europe solo in my twenties, and we landed in al and a stopover, and and ash Cloud went off in Iceland and we were the first flight to land and they said, you know, this is the developing situation. You're the first flight to come in. You can't travel on any further. Here's accommodation for twenty four hours. Yeah, and we got back to the airport after twenty four hours and they're like, you're on your own.

Oh so Nicole, first of all, could you like, we're in a position where you could you're saved to afford accommodation.

Well, I had travel insurance, but I actually met up with other travelers also going through Amsterdam, where I was my final destination was because I've got family in the Netherlands, and yeah, i just shacked up with them in a hotel and had to stretch a bed in one of the couple's hotel rooms. And and yeah, luckily we all when one of us got news of anything, we would all share it with each other. But yeah, we were basically stranded in the city of kl Because you know,

Yeah, Nicole, jeez, well, I just sort of feel like a situation like that, you make the most of it, Dot you m M. Do you know what I mean? Extra week's foca.

Can make the most of it? How they?

You know, said the sights everything that Quie.

Thank you, Nicole. Where did you get stranded? Sarah?

Good morning, Good morning, beautiful people.

How are we good? Thank you? This sounds horrific.

What happened.

I'm still traumatized. Yes, So, our family was traveling in Europe in twenty eighteen, and part of that euro trip was in London. So at the time our children were my son was six and my daughter had literally just turned thirteen while.

We're over there.

Yes, so I thought that it would be a lovely occasion to take the children into London on the tube and have a bit of a sight here around London. So I have been to England before, so I was very very aware of when you get on the tube, you get on and you get on quick. Yes, those doors slam shut and they are relentless yep. So I

Because it was so busy, she went and.

Stepped around the corner so I couldn't see her. She's walked out. I first see if she's given me big hug and sort of like was very befied herself too.

Ye.

Yeah, my daughter got stranded on a platform in London.

Oh my gosh, I should possibly could go wrong in the subway in London. Was a thirteen year old by yourself, sir.

Have you ever no mobile phone?

Yeah, that's the other thing. Have you ever felt a feeling like that before? Because I'd imagine there's nothing that could be It would be the most disgusting feeling, apparently.

And no, And you know, I still reflect on it every now and again. Now that goes exactly like you said, You're like all of the things that could have gone wrong. I'm like, oh my god, like she didn't have safe she didn't have a phone, because it's like, yes, she had a mobile phone, but didn't have a steam so she couldn't bring me. I didn't know like where she was and I'm just swinging it going see God, please let her still be there, say and you.

Know, I'm surprised. I'm surprised no one helped you though, Sarah.

That's a thing like, oh, I just couldn't believe it because it's just like you know, over there, it's like stress and then it's the door shut and it's just the norm and everyone's just sitting there reading their book and no emergency stop button and I'm just like, hello, people, kid, what happened.

On the platform?

And even like you know the window for the driver, I'm like here in Australia, you know, they look out on the platform and to see what's going on.

I'm just like, are you blind?

Awful? Thank you, Sarah.

Yesterday, Joe, you did something which I thought was really really interesting.

Was it enlightening for you?

It was very enlightening. You ran your little Mum Pawn segment. Now for those you're tuning for the first time. Can you, in a small definition, tell us exactly what mumporn is?

So are those little things that happened to us as mothers that make us unusually aroused in weird ways just because we're so excited that these.

Small things have happened to us. Yeah, okay, for example, I don't know.

One of the examples I used is last Friday night, I went to a function at Adelaide Oval and then I went straight upstairs and took me four minutes to get to the function to my room because I stayed in the hotel.

Mum.

Oh, yes, you're like that.

I do.

Actually, really, I really do so much so that I said, can I.

Have a do it?

Can I do a dad porn segment?

Of course you can?

And look if you've got one please of course thurday and twenty four to ten or textas so for double nine one nine nine on nine. We've got me think Joe's I have some good ones for all the fellas out there, those dads, and you know who I'm talking to. You're in that sport where maybe you appreciate those little things just ever so slightly more. You're not young anymore, are you?

No?

But that's okay. Kids are in bed on time, Friday night, fruity baby, freshly cut lawn. Get on my loan. When you go to your kid's birthday party and they tell you it's a drop and run. Get home from work and Carra has cooked a delicious chicken curry. Wife and kids are away naked couch time. What's this? A random American sports Netflix STOCKO. I didn't know about Dadpool. That's

Doncic while snaked on the couch.

Yes, once again, it's the.

Small things, isn't it.

Tasmania FC, the much anticipated new football club in the AFL, has revealed the name and look of its mascot on the first anniversary of the announcement of the new club's name and color. His name is Ruman, and he is indeed a Tasmanian devil.

Anyway, second, Rumman, can you take us through the origins of that? There's got to be some sort of significance. It's a very quirky name.

A bit of a hope about thing. So my grandparents used to call me a little rumman and rouffle me on the head when I was a kid. It's like a little like a little devil, like someone a little bit eccentric and cheeky.

Okay, So that's exclusively a Tasmaniy thing, just like the NBL side the jack jumpers. A lot of people still trying to work out what a jack jumper island there you go, produce, we go.

So he's made from recycled materials, which is so very.

Oh we're very close to the new, to the pristine and Tarctica, and we like to keep things clean of climate change, et cetera, et cetera.

That's very Tasmanium.

Recycled old school clothes, and weirdly enough, his face is made of an old leather jacket classic.

Which is strange because you don't see much sundown in Tasmania.

No exactly. So look, the brief was to not make him terrifying. I think we've got mixed results. It was made in conjunction with a puppeteers organization. So my first thought was, well, a little bit scary. But what's interesting about old Rumman is they will wield m out last night and then he would eat a football, so we ate a sharon and then he would turn around and poop it out.

Every single time. It's like I'm just going to go and kick with ruman.

A footing once again. And he's also got kneepads. Do you want to know why hear what's going on?

There is some sort of skateboarder.

No, that's a nodge too.

There's a famous football over oval in Queensland which is like northwestern Tasmania, and it's.

A gravel oval, completely gravel.

There's no grass on it because it's a mining town and they couldn't grow grass, so therefore they just play on gravel.

Hang on, but they're still good. Do you know they still play football there?

They do that safe. No, it's not.

I've seen pictures this morning of some of the players with blood is pouring from their kneecaps.

A tasty devil. Tasty Devils is supposed to be terrifying, by the way. Yeah, you guys know what sounded tasty devil makes.

Yeah, it's like it's.

No, I think that's generous. I think that's actually a lovely version of a tazzy devil. Have you heard them? Listen to this? If you could be a design to be ferocious, if you.

Could just get me the sound of a tazzy devil pooping out a Sharon, that'd be great.

The same time. We work on that behind the scenes now every now and nan Jared's and there's a bit of a I'd call it a social media war between every single department. It's not just professional sports. Sometimes it's our services. Give Staypy a goal and go rather and if they want to give you a nice little nugget piece of goal, then good on them.

South Australa Police have released a statement this morning, a media release, and I would like to deliver it to you in my best news voice if you don't mind.

Oh this is where you shine, so your news voice. By the way, we've spoken about this for I don't know what people change the tone of their voice when they're speaking on the news, but it's much more basy like this.

It's what you have to do when you walk into a recording booth. Sorry, cause something comes over my body and I can't help it. So this is the saphold breaking news that accompanied a photo of a cow with a bucket on its head on the side of the highway.

Here we go ready.

At four twenty am, police were called to the Old Princess Highway, Indoorsley after reports of a cow acting suspiciously. The cow was spotted moving along the road in disguise with a bucket over its head to conceal its identity. After a high stakes pursuit, patrols managed to wrangle the bucket off the cow's head. The cow was cautient for wearing an article of disguise and safely returned to its paddock without further incident.

Looks like this cow was trying to milk the situation for all it was worth.

Congratulations over nearly a thousand comments on this, which is hilarious, but some of them that piqued my interests utterly disgraceful behavior.

Very good.

I'm glad the officers were strong enough to escort the cow home. It's a milkstrey how it got there and if it was a bull it would have been charged and well played South Australia on the comments.

We'll take that. What a nice little team effort yesterday, Jodes, you just I mean you shocked us. You shocked us. Do you want to tell us again the breaking news that you delivered on No. Over nine or n Okay?

All right, here we go. I said it before and I'll say it again. Don't be a smart ass.

What I said was there are no eggs on the shelves, not only in my supermarket, but also in my fruit and vegetba.

So so, first of all, you're gotta be careful when you deliver news like this because for our small little minds, if we're not ready for it, we could swear lucky still be here.

To be honest, and whilst I am very aware the egg shortage has been underway for quite some time now, I just feel.

Like it's escalated.

Oh okay, so much so that I had to say to my favorite fruit and veg places at the avenues, hey, could you save me some eggs when they're delivered tomorrow?

Which he did.

He put some aside, and I got two cartons. I got two cartons, I tell you, because those things are like liquid gold at the moment.

Yeah right, okay, produce them only here. Yesterday I went to Foodland Jodes. There was three shells full of eggs.

I know, well, you must have got lucky they're producing.

Obviously you live in a very chicken rich suburb, so.

Chickens run free out there.

At the beach all the time. Yep, okay, So I don't know your point being one, do you know what?

Let's start with this because our heads are just overblown at the moment. First of all, there's an egg shortage, lady gentlemen, let's get your head around that. And if you don't mind as well, what do you got producing?

Well, I don't know if you know, trody, but dazzle land it's closing.

No, you're kidding, right, this is what we're doing. Say, oh jeez, we don't want to blow your mind.

This is what we're doing.

No, I think we asked this. Let's go to newsreader, Josh.

What have you got guys. Sebastian has just won Australian idol.

Oh, that's fantastic news. That's awesome. That's really nice. I'm pumped about that. That was fun. This is a bit more serious. This is getting hurt. A woman's been arrested with a boogie board full of a substance in barley but leaves me in marijuana. My very goodness, where did this come from?

Outrageous?

That's crazy. Now to your sport, some really concerning news about the Grand Prix. It's been shifted to Melbourne. Okay, can you believe you had? I don't think so. Final bit of sports.

News is you don't have to play the nover thing every single time you do it?

All right, this is good news. This is good news. This just came through.

The winner is Cindy.

Sydney's going to host the two thousand Olympics. Can you believe it?

Yeah, I'm a little depleted because I don't have my amigas at the moment.

You need to know.

I need to know now, I need to know.

I need to know.

I need to know what's in the news today to know this.

Is just what you need to know.

What you need to know with Jody and Asy.

Okay, so you know, I'm a little bit obsessed with White Lotus season three at the moment.

They drop an episode every single Monday. Hazy.

Yeah, I'm still trying to get my head around theme song. That's what's going on here. I'm late to the party. But that is literally someone gone with their hand over their mouth. Is that what's happening.

It's some of the show. It's just a bit quirky, a bit different out there.

Basically, if you've never watched White Lotus before the premises, they take a different location each and every time, get a whole heap of couples, families and throw them in on a holiday adventure. So I sat down and watched it last night, and things got loose, like real loose. Like I was watching with my mother Colleen, and she was like, Oh, this is all a bit debaucherous, isn't It is an interesting word. Yes, Colleen, feel free to

What are they called the white not white parties?

One of those where you switch partners.

No, they happen, this is a wholesome chat. They happen specifically in Thailand. Anyway, it'll come to me in a moment.

Yeah, that's it.

Very different.

And so they have one of those, and then four people all ended back in a private room. So two of them were brothers, and I didn't honestly didn't think too much of it because they had a bit spoiler a bit of.

A passion I go down this part.

So now I've clicked online this morning and this is the headline.

The White Lotus has left you as shocked after an incestuous scene featuring Patrick Swartz Snegger, son of Arnold, and his on screen brother were aired. So it's an interesting theme that has been explored in other shows, hasn't it?

Because I think I just reckon. We're getting to the stage where we're so desensitized as a world that it's like, well, what's the next thing that can shop?

Yeah?

Yeah, it happened in Game of Throws. I haven't seen Game of Thrones. We aproundly there's a lot of sort of that sort of gear in that. And also for everyone and most people watch the Menendez brothers stopping on a tree.

Yes, it was chock a block for it.

The shower scene, it's actually a full moon celebration. There we go, ah, yeah, what sort of moon? I don't know anyway, So that was weirdly enough for it.

The incest stuff wasn't the most shocking thing to me last night because there was a scene in it where the dad, who is having a few problems, was dipping into his wife's prescription medicine cabinet and anyway, so he's a bit off his chops, and he was sitting in one of those robes in a like hotel room robes which we all know don't cover too much. But he's sitting there just talking to his family. Next minute, leans back on his chair, he fully exposes all he's junk,

Right, Well, I'm glad that you said that because insert tazzy jokes, all those types of things. I don't want to go down that bath.

Okay, I think we're above it, all right, nothing to see here?

Wait are you above it? There you go. Thank you for the latest on White Lotus.