[SPEAKER_01]: This is the Jockel Underground podcast number one, seventy-eight sitting here with Carrie Helton. [SPEAKER_01]: Carrie first time in the hot seat on the UG. [SPEAKER_01]: First time on the Underground, happy to be here. [SPEAKER_01]: Do you think you're going to be able to read these questions? [SPEAKER_01]: I'm going to try. [SPEAKER_01]: Do you think you're going to be better than Echo Trolls? [SPEAKER_00]: Possibly. [SPEAKER_01]: All right. [SPEAKER_01]: We'll see.
[SPEAKER_01]: We'll see how it goes. [SPEAKER_01]: Let's get into these things. [SPEAKER_01]: We got a bunch of questions from people trying to provide some guidance, some courses of actions that you can take overcoming some of the challenges you're facing out there. [SPEAKER_01]: So let's get into it. [SPEAKER_01]: first question.
[SPEAKER_00]: Good evening echo and jacco on underground episode one forty seven when you mentioned paying for your kids college so they'll take care of you when you're older. [SPEAKER_00]: Did you mean that literally? [SPEAKER_00]: You've often said that you should help others without expecting anything on return. [SPEAKER_00]: It's even in where your kid too. [SPEAKER_00]: My parents paid for my education. [SPEAKER_00]: I do feel I owe them, but they used that to guilt me.
[SPEAKER_00]: It would feel transactional. [SPEAKER_00]: But if they used that to guilt me, it would feel transactional. [SPEAKER_00]: Likewise, if I paid for my kids tuition, my future kids tuition, I'd want them to care for me because they want to, not because they feel obligated. [SPEAKER_00]: So to me, [SPEAKER_00]: paying tuition to, I'm sorry. [SPEAKER_00]: So to me, tying tuition to future care seems to go against the idea of giving freely without expecting something back.
[SPEAKER_01]: How did you think you did? [SPEAKER_00]: Terrible. [SPEAKER_00]: Terrible. [SPEAKER_01]: You know, you had some, you had some things I could see when you got to tying tuition. [SPEAKER_01]: You thought that that was a mistake. [SPEAKER_01]: I did. [SPEAKER_01]: And you changed it. [SPEAKER_01]: I did. [SPEAKER_01]: Proactively. [SPEAKER_01]: So, what not about, I'll tell you, echoed Charles over the years.
[SPEAKER_01]: His first ones, he would edit them heavily, but he was not good at reading a lot. [SPEAKER_01]: I would venture to say he's still not that good. [SPEAKER_01]: But he definitely got better. [SPEAKER_01]: It's a little bit of a skill. [SPEAKER_01]: I think you can develop. [SPEAKER_01]: But I'd give you like maybe. [SPEAKER_01]: I'd give you a solid reading. [SPEAKER_01]: Well, I'd give you a C. No reading allowed first like first time you see something. [SPEAKER_01]: It's tricky.
[SPEAKER_01]: It is. [SPEAKER_01]: It's tricky. [SPEAKER_01]: There's like you can have like I'm decent at it kind of naturally. [SPEAKER_01]: I'm not very good at many things naturally. [SPEAKER_01]: Like I'm pretty much like not good at stuff. [SPEAKER_01]: But I'm lucky that I'm okay at that. [SPEAKER_01]: And Echo is not, but he's developed it. [SPEAKER_00]: You know, all the time. [SPEAKER_01]: So there we go. [SPEAKER_01]: Let's get into this. [SPEAKER_01]: So good question.
[SPEAKER_01]: And to straight up, like, I would have to go back and listen to exactly what I said, but no, I don't mean that. [SPEAKER_01]: And I'm glad you caught that. [SPEAKER_01]: I definitely don't mean that literally. [SPEAKER_01]: I think maybe what I, as I try and think about what I could have meant, what I might have meant, again, I'd have to go back and let's do it.
[SPEAKER_01]: I might have meant that if they go to college, hopefully that puts them in a path where they have a good career and if they so desired, they could take care of me if I needed it when I was older than my wife as well. [SPEAKER_01]: just a little side note here, parenthetically. [SPEAKER_01]: At this juncture in time, if you've heard me talk over the past few years, I definitely don't think that college is necessarily the best way to set yourself up for success.
[SPEAKER_01]: There's a lot of other options right now. [SPEAKER_01]: I think the trades probably are paramount right now because I don't care how good AI gets. [SPEAKER_01]: It's not going to be able to [SPEAKER_01]: Brewer, your house, or fix the plumbing leak that you've got. [SPEAKER_01]: AI is not going to do that for you. [SPEAKER_01]: So going into the trades, I think is excellent, going to military. [SPEAKER_01]: There's plenty of options out there that are not college.
[SPEAKER_01]: But regardless of the path that my kids chose, I would try and help them travel down that path. [SPEAKER_01]: But, in case important here, this is not so that they would owe me, right, in the future. [SPEAKER_01]: Because you are correct that when we help people and we give people things and we move them in a positive direction, we should do that without expecting anything of their turn.
[SPEAKER_01]: And in fact, the minute you expect something in return, it kind of is... [SPEAKER_01]: There's a little bit of a hint of badness in there, right? [SPEAKER_01]: And it's the same thing with cover and move. [SPEAKER_01]: You know, we teach a dash on front of the first law of combat, leadership is cover and move, which means you support your team, but I don't support you carry with the thing in the back of my mind that says, well, now that I supported you, you owe me support.
[SPEAKER_01]: I don't do that. [SPEAKER_01]: That's not what we're doing here. [SPEAKER_01]: So, yes, you are correct. [SPEAKER_01]: The goal, the [SPEAKER_01]: Another element here is the actual goal for me is that no one needs to take care of me when I'm over like, we've got things handled.
[SPEAKER_01]: And you know, financially handled and physically I'd stay in good enough shape, but you know, there's something you can't control, but but we are trying to set ourselves up my wife and I, so that my kids won't have the burden, the financial burden of caring for us when we're older. [SPEAKER_01]: So that's kind of the actual goal goal.
[SPEAKER_01]: And then on top of all this, [SPEAKER_01]: I would say that the real goal is that if you raise good kids, they're going to want to help you out and take area if you need it. [SPEAKER_01]: So do a good job as a parent and I think your kids will help you out and I think that's a good thing. [SPEAKER_01]: That's kind of where I'm at. [SPEAKER_01]: You caught me. [SPEAKER_01]: I think I don't know exactly what I said. [SPEAKER_01]: I'll have to go back and listen to it.
[SPEAKER_01]: But I did not mean to say that you should help your kids pay for college. [SPEAKER_01]: So they have to take care of you and a good older. [SPEAKER_01]: But a good kid that you raised is going to look at you and say, oh, yeah, you know, I really appreciate what you did for me. [SPEAKER_01]: And you need help now that your, you know, the roles are reversed.
[SPEAKER_01]: And they see that, because a lot of times you forget, you know, it's easy to forget what your parents did for you, right? [SPEAKER_01]: That they went through all kinds of crap for your dumb ass. [SPEAKER_01]: Literally crap. [SPEAKER_00]: So, and this is care, right? [SPEAKER_00]: If you care for them, you know, they're going to care for you. [SPEAKER_01]: In most cases, in the vast majority of cases. [SPEAKER_01]: Are there people that are freaking psychos?
[SPEAKER_01]: Yes, there are. [SPEAKER_01]: Yep, there are. [SPEAKER_01]: Are there people that are sociopaths? [SPEAKER_01]: Yep, there are. [SPEAKER_01]: But most people gonna be cool. [SPEAKER_00]: So, next question. [SPEAKER_00]: Hey, Jaco. [SPEAKER_00]: I have something I've been struggling with a lot lately. [SPEAKER_00]: I'm thirty-two blue collar grew up in a blue collar home. [SPEAKER_00]: I spent my childhood playing different sports and hunting.
[SPEAKER_00]: Now I have a five-year-old daughter that is the sweetest thing ever. [SPEAKER_00]: Love her to death. [SPEAKER_00]: I am struggling big time with her completely losing her shit breaking down and crying over some of the smallest little issues. [SPEAKER_00]: For instance, this Sunday we were getting ready for church. [SPEAKER_00]: She just got a new dress and was excited to wear it for the first time.
[SPEAKER_00]: She got herself all dressed and while my wife was helping fix her hair I walked into the bathroom and the baby with the baby and she just started bawling because she wanted to show off for me and her look wasn't complete and I spoiled her surprise. [SPEAKER_00]: She ran in the room, hiding by the bed, absolutely losing her shit. [SPEAKER_00]: I tried to talk to her, but it only made her emotions worse. [SPEAKER_00]: My question for you is how to make your daughter's mentally tough.
[SPEAKER_00]: Again, she's five, so I know she is still very young, but I want to instill in her. [SPEAKER_00]: I want to instill it in her young. [SPEAKER_00]: I've already started years ago teaching her to have good manners. [SPEAKER_00]: Yes, sir. [SPEAKER_00]: No, sir. [SPEAKER_00]: No, thank you. [SPEAKER_00]: I've tried several times to help her be tough, but it hasn't stuck yet. [SPEAKER_00]: Any suggestions would be much appreciated. [SPEAKER_00]: Thank you. [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, man.
[SPEAKER_01]: You kind of know this because you said mention it a bunch of times. [SPEAKER_01]: So that is a little excerpt of what we are doing on the Jocco Underground podcast.
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