Full Show: D*ck Togs & Sh*tuations

Jason on Nomber one hundred.

Well, good morning everybody, Wednesday morning. Mum and dad were out last night.

Or mum and son, Mum and uh, well friends. Actually Clinton, I went to the tennis. We didn't go together though we both just went to the tennis.

We didn't We didn't even sit We saw each other, but across the course.

Yeah, oh yes, I've.

Got the new iPhone seventeen. And I zoomed in and I could see you're sitting there very clearly. And the Matt Golfie from Missington was behind me goes, you're zooming in on standards. I said, sure, I am, look out and we both just sat there in absolute wonder at me. No have how good the zoom on the iPhone seventeen nothing to do with you.

Look, you can see wrinkles, they're so clear.

And then we panned around.

We panned around and some other hoties and yeah, that's corner there.

You got to hold your hold your phone very steady, though.

Not on your iPhone seventeen. It's got some stabilizing situation.

I was going to buy your.

Tripod for but I was literally sitting at the other end of the stadium and look at this photo of Clint.

This is a paid ad for sounds like Jesus.

It's pretty clear.

You could print that in the Herald Sun.

It looks like your.

Eyes rolling in the back of your head. Well, there's Mark Murphy behind you from car.

It looks like a pap shot, doesn't it.

And what's his name? Colin long Hair?

Darcy Moore Moore?

Good night at the tennis Jase.

Nadia bar tells it. I can see everyone around you.

That's funny.

Yes, well it wasn't real.

There was your poor old.

I loved Hugo Guston.

I'm still yet to see the veil entrance from Naomi. Wait, wait and see? All right, is it going to get like the Super Bowl? You know, like remember Travis Kelsey getting off the bus last year and it's like a little fashion parade walking there.

There's a small situation that I thought might stop it from ever happening again, but we'll go into that a bit later.

Okay, here is there a situation at the I think there's a potential situation in Melbourne.

There's a lot of stomach type flus going.

Feeling better, Yeah, much better?

Thank you what you have today? I reckon i'd about two killer.

I thought you said, shit, what shed you shared?

Shed?

How did you shed it?

Okay, Hey, we've got a big show coming up to that fifty thousand dollars our brand new game Brick by brick, thanks to Mate, to Carlile Holmes. We're going to do that after seven this morning. It's so easy to win fifty k. It's just a simple game of higher or lower. Uh. Not only that, we have Victoria's Police Officer of the Year coming in. What a title, A cheesy.

Friend of the show. I mean, I think we helped on his PRK campaign.

To be honest, does he get some sort we will ask him, does he get some sort of ticket tape parade or something he should do open, you know in the fact of convertible waving to Melbourne.

Or a paddy wagon arm coming out the side window.

Put him on a float.

That's a great idea.

All right, big show coming up and let's get into it right across Melbourne. This is nov This is Noverer one hundred. Hey, cool off this summer at fun Fields Theme Park, Victoria's ultimate one day holiday destination. Thrills, slides and endless fun await at fun Fields theme Parky. Thanks to those guys, we have group passes and a thousand dollars cash to go this morning. When you hear us play a throwback song before seven this morning, now.

I hope it's a better throwback song than yesterday's because I in protest did not like.

Yes, I wasn't it yesterday? So what was it? We were shaking it like a polaroid pict No. No, I think it'll be something strong like Stacy's.

Mama's, Stacy's mum or who Let the Dogs Out?

Also flip and the song.

I mean it's we'd stay on the first week back. Just don't play games with me. Play a banger, That's what I would do.

Agree with that, Lauren.

Thanks Cleyes, Thank young lady. You're on my side for ever.

Yes, can we.

Do your other favorite walking on a Dream empor the Sun?

But that's not really a I mean, I reckon A throwback has to be sort of nineties, doesn't.

It, do you know what?

No?

Yeah, two thousands is fine. Last night at the tennis I went with Ralph Lauren Fragrances is it?

Lauren and Lauren?

Lauren?

Ralph Lauren and you're Laurent too, and I'm Lauren, right.

And they had people engraving your name in these magnificent bottles fragrance bottles anyway, that was sensational, so you can get some for your friends. And I just went and got another one with my name on it case it runs out, I should have got one for.

You, no fag anyway, So yours, says Ralph Lauren Lauren.

Well, I was like, my name's alreadyritten on any of them. I can have whatever I want, right anyway.

I sat with Kegan Palmer, skateboarder obsessed.

He won a gold medal.

He was the first gold medal skateboarder that twenty two year old.

What was your chat like?

Well, talk about monos.

When I realized.

When I realized he was born in two thousand and two, two thousand and four must have been.

The chat would have run out pretty I was.

Like, Oh my gosh, so throwbacks can go to two one.

So he is only twenty two? Yeah, I know.

I followed his story At the Paris Olympics. I hung out with him and Tony Hawk.

He's wild and people were like, I'm going to say frothing over.

Oh yeah, they would be froth He's so cool.

Oh my god, such a nice boy. And I'm old enough to be his mother.

So old, that's so cool. I think you're you know, froth milk, hang on you froth milk, frothing fro.

I think you're froping. You're not frothing, You're saying the same thing, froth.

Froth.

I'm fro fropping over it.

You're froth.

I think you're frosing.

I fro sick.

Do you know?

I walked in and someone said to me, Oh, thank god you're here, because I thought it was only young people tonight. And I don't know if I'm offenders that you're saying I'm old, or if I'm flooded to be included with the young people.

Was it Shane Bourne who said that? Thank god?

Worrying Emmeron Tom Hawkins are here too, and they're also old.

Outside your party on Friday night, there were these girls at the table outside and as I'm ducking into it because you had like a private room. As I'm ducking in, one of the girls as a fan of the show, and I'm chatting with her, and her friend next to her goes, I got no idea who you are. I'm young. I was like, oh, okay, I have a great night.

Thanks Young. I'll piss off seriously away.

I like.

Coffee.

She hasn't had a coffee.

That's what she gets A bit lippy to leave the tennis coffee for you.

Oh gosh, I had a great time at the tennis.

We're trying to finish.

It's late.

I watched the start of the women's and then I was like, what am I doing? I have to get up at four o'clock in the morning. And Paul called me and said, John, pick you up and I said, no, I'm getting the champagne. I'm having a champagne with Keegan Palma. And he said, Lauren, you're nearly forty. Go to bed and grow up. That's what he said to me. What time was this, I don't know, like ten thirty or something.

Yeah, right, yeah.

And then I got home and I was like, right, ready to go to bed, and my three nieces and my sister in law and.

Brother in law were all there.

Oh no, they were high on YOCHI, bouncing off the walls here like see ya knock themselves out and going to bed.

So you're in to bed before the kids. Yeah, made that Yochi stuff. Oh, it's fantastic.

It was annoyed they didn't get me.

Any a couple of mixings. The old scales will get you, though, I don't. They just the AD's up quick.

It really just the one.

Where you take it and if you guess the right weight, you get it for free.

Oh.

I like the places. Does that?

Have you seen there's a chip bar here in Melbourne where chill. Yeah, and then it's got It's like it's like yo chi and there's all the toppings and you make your own loaded fries and then you just get charged the weight. Yeah.

But I saw a woman do a review and she was like, I reckon, this is pretty reasonable.

Thirty two two dollars for hot ships, mac Is, you're aut four dollars?

What are you dropping? Lobster on tops? Lobster Mornings, Bacon.

Bits, Jason Lawrence throw that track.

I can't play with the Spice girls today. It's been on the nose. Paging Emily in whereby to the er stat please she's a nurse. Good morning, m morning morning.

You're a way to work.

Yes, I am.

You're gonna love this. Scored yourself thousand dollars.

Cash, thank you so much.

Chuck your group pastor fun Fields as well. Cool, oh beautiful.

Thank you.

What a way to start your Wednesday morning. Emily, Yeah, yeah, I do.

Are you in the what department are you in at the hospital?

The nick.

You do an amazing job. That is a very very special place. I've had friends who have spent a lot of time there recently and who nurses are incredible.

Thank you for everything you do.

M thank you so much.

Now that that songs apparently.

Apparently Madonna, Yeah, that exact song, what is Old is New Again?

It's thanks to Well, that's exactly it. My friend text me to say, really, that song is going off right now? I said, why. She said, Heated Rivalry. The show we're talking about the other day was just.

The gay ice hockey players. The peeps are going off to this song, she says. She says peeps. I don't think she's young enough to say.

Casey are entertainment reported.

I believe so plays in a nightclub when they're.

Having a pash.

Yeah.

Apparently, apparently there's a lot of a lot of songs that are coming back thanks to Heat Rivalry.

The soundtrack is very good.

Sister's always on the tech isn't she after the kids at all? I think, so are they defending for themselves?

This is when Uncle Clint baby sits. Come on, children sit around the wireless.

Your nephew first year of school? Yeah, coming up, that's exciting. He put on the uniform.

Oh yeah, he put it on like they went to the uniform shop in September or October and he put it straight on.

I remember, I still have like nightmares about uniform shops.

Like that fits. I'm like, it's too big to.

Grow into another one in a month. Give a couple of sizes so he gets.

As a kid, I'd look like I was.

In a ball gown first year of high school for Felix. We dropped it well over a grand at the uniform shop. Really, hell, is it a blazer job?

No, it's not a state school.

Yeah, it was a thousand official like school bag and everything.

I was like, a thousand dollars. You could have gone to Prata.

I should have gone to Prata rocking in he wants Prada.

I don't think it's a blazer job. And then I've got other friends that are going to is it e L T? You know, like Early learned where it's like before pre prep, pre prep and the schools they've got to wear a blazer.

No they do not.

Yes, five year olds wearing blazers, to.

Wear a blazer at five, but not that's that's prep.

I will be four prep. They're wearing blazers. That's crazy.

Oh that's just a cash grab, isn't it. Imagine how many of those get lost?

Imagine how many daycare.

Like my little niece, you send her in the cutest dress, you know, when you pick it up, she's in like a dinosaur T shirt, t rex pads.

I'm like, what are you wearing?

Meanwhile, Jenny in her class is now rocking the nice seat outfit on the weekend.

Seriously, they've what happens there? They change them and they come home with all sorts of random things.

Yeah, I reckon the actual KINDI teachers got a little Facebook marketplace and the.

Nice clothes and everyone comes home dressed the store of the Explorer?

Where's your jackets? Facebook marketplace, gig and mate could be if you want to back, hey, just go on twenty six pars six, gonna check your latest news and you're run to work. Another shark attack? What about that?

It's he briefly spoke about this yesterday, but we'll dive into a bit later.

But what is lurking beneath? I know, I mean it is terrifying.

And apparently it's all the rain. I'm like, well, Heaven help us in melboury is it?

Yeah? Yeah, the rain brings out to me saying murky waters.

And so many people swim in Sydney Harbor, like jump off boats and little boats and all kinds.

Of things, and all the bull sharks come out because of the rain.

But the bull sharks don't have any bull sharks are more clean.

They're like number one.

And then lots of them too in those Gold Coast rivers.

Oh they're a breeding ground. So I llegal to swim in the Gold Coast canals because they're literally nurseries. Oh no, Yeah, we're going to be joined by a shark expert just after seven the same summer holidays. More tickets to the AO. Later on in the show, we're going to get inside Rod Labor.

It's amazing out there. I went for the first time last night.

And they do it well.

It's but it's enormous. There's so much to do, so much.

To see, isn't it funny though. Let you drive past later in the year when it's not set up and on the outskirtule, it doesn't seem that big there. I was.

I was at the Grand Height yesterday and I was upstairs and you could look down. I was like the bird's eye view into and when you see it from that perspective, it is so big.

There is so many people, and there's so much happening.

Again because they've run out of room, they've gone up, so most of the activations in our double story.

Like that Mecca.

Yeah, there's this really funny video of these two guys in that three story pink mecha and someone's zoomed in and it just says two men stuck in the barbie front the house and I just lost.

In how many levels is the mecha one?

And then there's there's a couple of mechads.

And there's a there's a bar which overlooks one of the courts, and that's double story and a sky walk between.

The bar, and to an extent, I think laborty, but.

It's elaborate the players walking to the courts, Like maybe we need to invest in some sort of tunnel system security around.

The outside you and but that's part of the fund.

But curious, I'll sign at the end or sign at the end. Focus.

I love it and I just I love seeing all the keys, like you know, you see the keys zipping around, You're like, who's in the back?

Like, who's in the back gets me excited?

You know Roger when he was playing in Crown and he would drive himself to the game.

Did he what's It's funny you should say that because last night I interviewed one of Lauren's mates.

Pat Rafter.

Did he write He wrote it lines, He actually wrote it, told you and he came in into the Emirates ma helmet holding his helmet.

I didn't use the commune.

He was very happy with himselfs.

I told you this on Monday.

But I didn't hang on.

I got validation.

Sorry. He carries his own helmet. He doesn't use the communal one.

And he changes his shoes, Paddy Rafters, he writes in his writing shoes and then when he.

Gets there he the clickers. He did have his backpack, he takes backpack. Can't remember he changes his shoes. You don't need to clip in.

You run out of money or something, or he just like he's got.

Two pairs of shoes.

He said he's joining us in here next week. You'll he'll see us all then, So there you go.

He'll ride in. He should do he.

Better if he said he's coming, he better turn up. I'm having dinner with him on Friday night, and I'm going to hold him to it.

Where you're going, hopefully they've got a bike crack out in front.

He'll ride his bike. I'll get I'll get some content.

You should ride in as well to dinner.

Carry. I don't think the line bikes have a sidecart.

I shan't be doing that, but thank you for the suggestion.

Anyway, I might take one of those keys and see if anyone's peeking in to see who's Lauren.

But the dark.

With a bike crack on the back.

Raffa always had the same driver when he'd come to me, because they just get random drivers, and he always wanted the same driver. And he went to the driver's house for dinner, and the wife, the driver's wife cooked dinner.

And she's so nervous because you still playing.

Oh no, you could poison him.

Give him a name and he gets poison.

Yeah, you got to go. No, chicken. Then he's yeah, veggio or veggie. Yeah, sorry, the chickens dry. I don't want to kill you.

Yeah no, god, that's.

You know, I would want the same driver as well. Like imagine if you're every now and then you get a bad, bad uber driver and it just rattles you like you want to be in a good headspats going to the game. Yeah, it's why I always sort of surprising that, like artists will do interviews before a concert.

Oh yeah, yeah, I don't know, bad question in your as Yeah exactly.

Do you reckon that getting up and singing a couple of tunes is not as hard as playing in an Australian Open.

Fine, no, but I'm just saying, like, you know, and there they're listening to us on the in the keys on the way to the court, because that'd be a real mood shift.

Would Are you playing in the Australian Open and are you listening to this or are you driving one of those.

You know what, let's just say, are you playing in the Australian Open? Yeah?

Or are you a key driver? Not any key driver? You one of the official key drivers?

Yes?

Maybe next summer we could get a gig as being the key.

Drive so they don't pay.

Oh my goodness, is free car push the volunteers?

Yeah?

Man, the pressure right right right?

No, Lauren, go right. I'm sorry. I haven't brought you to the right state here.

I'm so not good.

You just got to just run across the road.

You'd be right, too, young, not Melbourne Park.

Yeah, I'll put the hazards on. I can't stop here, I can't stop. You're gonna have to get out quick, it out.

Quicker out quick, okay, because there's no tennis twenty.

Four ten If you wear a tennis player played at.

This played at the Australian Open.

Do you play tennis?

You know what, I'll take the ball kid at this point? Are you a ball kid?

Oh? No?

They fainted. God, they're dropping like flies, aren't they? Airport?

They're hot and you know what, I think we need to swap them out. It is hot out there.

You mentioned the other day, zooperduepa in the left hand ball and the other It can be done. How's the weather looking for the tennis today?

I mean, well, actually, today's the one kind of semi off day in our glorious summer.

Close the roof, but this weekend.

It's thirty nine, Jason, you're not going to go We're getting back to the forties nearly.

I'm going to go down like a ball kid.

So it's yeah, look today and tomorrow we get some respect. Twenty three today, twenty tomorrow. Then for the weekend, long weekend, Thank you very much. Welcome back to work everyone. We're getting a long weekend. Twenty seven. Friday thirty eight, Saturday twenty eight, Sunday twenty nine, Monday five thirty eight.

It's not great. I'm in a basketball hall.

Look as long as it's dry and not windy. Yeah, I love that dry.

The seasons have really shifted now because you know, December is no longer really that hot, is it. It was sort of a bit crappy in December, So it's almost like summer has shifted.

I feel like.

It's always the first week of the Australian Open we get really hot weather.

Ye.

I need to try apparol in the ninja slushy, Okay, I have to get that a hand. Rehydrate everyone. Hey, coming off the summer holidays, it's that time of the year where I mentioned the other day, when the kids are in the pool post three pm. I go, please be careful. We are not doing a hospital run.

Dad's had too many apparoles and to drive you to an ambulance job.

And that's dramatic.

This pretty much sums up my five weeks at home with the kids day one of the school holidays. Right. I walked into the upstairs bathroom. Now I'm one of those people. I'm always up everyone in the house going mop up the bathroom floor.

I hate a slippery wet so do I My fiance Paul.

I think he's allergic to like bath mats.

Yeah, my wife's the same.

You can be right there and he'll I'm like, do you drip dry standing next to it?

Does he get out of the shower straight away? It's like, get the towel, dry yourself in the shower.

I don't do that. I don't do that now it's too steamy. I've got enormous big bath mat is what do they call? Yeah, I'm like, are you sheets?

Bath sheets?

Might you just stand next to it? And like why it's so weird?

Yes, well my bath rail is quite a distance from the shower.

Oh that's bad.

See what happens? You have to sort of plot across a few times.

You've got to do the little naked run.

A couple of years.

You're railing anyway, You're railings everywhere in the shower.

And also from Shane a blaze on the block for that.

So and everyone's always like, no one slips over, You're the only one that slips over, And I'm well, I'm at that age now where it's not slipping over, it's having a fall. Yeah. Anyway, I get out of the shower. This is day one of school holidays.

Bang, you did nude on the floor?

Water visual You love this flipping around like a turtle who had been flipped on his back, screaming. Imagine that the rage in his face. Oh, you would have been over read.

I was laying down and bloody hurt my back and then I'm laying there because it takes it. I didn't want to get up straight away. I felt like I'd hurt my back and I'm laying there and I'm laying on this wet floor, and then I realized it's not water. I'm laying in. You went in? Did you piss?

What was it?

The three year old had gone for a WII in the middle of the night and the floor. He's missed the shower. No, no, outside the shower in the bathroom and the surrounding tiles.

But he fully missed the entire thing.

East three, it's the lights off feet you's spraying that thing like a fire.

Hawts What just all over the floor?

Yeah? I sweater god, laying and pissed day one school holidays?

Did you not see it?

Did you walk in with the lights off too and have a dark shower? Did you not see it when you walk down?

I just thought it was water from the shower. It wasn't floral yellow, yeah.

Just still liquid. Okay, So what did we do? Did we jump?

They just go oh, I can't be bothered, So I just piss on the floor. That with the word pieces discussed, I said that I'm very sorry. They just wheel over.

My sister in laws bought stickers like little target stickers to stick in her toilet for her boys because they keep missing. You should get it for you. I don't miss. Well, are you sure it was that?

You're forty three, so I'm glad you don't miss.

There would be a problem if you just got up in the middle of the night.

I'd give it five more years. Was it.

When was the realization that it wasn't water? Did you sort of like it was?

After about twenty seconds. I was just laying there and I'm like, no, no, I didn't do that.

Yeah, twenty seconds you left.

So you were actually waiting in.

The wind the floor for twenty seconds maybe ten? Would it felt like a lifetime?

God. I jumped up though when I realized.

There wasn't water, straight back in the shower, and.

Then you can imagine imagine the casual chat downstairs.

Then who got in trouble?

Everyone?

Well they didn't all wear on the floor.

No, but it set the precedent for this is I've been saying for months to clean.

Up the shower and no peeing on the floor.

And how is your cocksis? It's fine?

Now.

I knew you'd be disgusted. That's what kids do, mate, yell.

They're teach them to sit down in the middle of the night. You know what, you and sit down?

You need a trough at home?

Imagine if you do.

You remember the blokes put one in on the block too. Yeah, you mentioned walking in a urinal in someone's house with the urinal cakes. No thanks, Getting out of the shower next to a urinal.

No, I'm good Lisa cleaner. When she comes, she can change the urinal.

She could turn.

Welcome morning, Melbourne, another great week of good weather or though we might get some showers later on this afternoon.

I was saying a little respite.

I was saying to you earlier. I was down near the Frankston Foreshore yesterday afternoon. It was heaving.

Well, isn't there a jellyfish situation down there?

Now?

I wasn't stopping the kids. Tell you what the situation is at the moment, and that is shark attacks, fourth one in four days. We're gonna be drawn by a shark expert very soon to chat about it some of the videos and say, Brody show Lauren.

The Please don't I don't. I don't need to say that's shark bite.

No, it's not a shark bite. It's some of the size of the sharks they're catching in Sydney Harbor and stuff at the moment. Now, sark is incredible.

Okay, So we're going to be joined by a shark expert.

Now Sydney Harbor, that shark yeah, yeah.

I want to know if we're getting those things in the bay, what's in the bay.

Well, apparently there was a baby baby great white spotted.

In the bay.

Yeah, we're in down in Portsy Pier, Portsy at the Portsy Pier. Okay, please stop showing me shark videos. Brody in Portsy over the summer, people jumping off the pier and there were two great whites. No, they said they call them. Oh no, there's a different name. It wasn't great White and it sounded way cuter. And I was like, that sounds fun or the same. I was going to say, what, no, no.

What we're I'm sure there was a few white pointers.

Sure, if you're jumping into him, that's not a shark, is it.

Oh my god?

Look at the white pointers they're calling them like, oh, I don't know what that calling.

You know what, I'll find.

Those ones can't harm you.

Well they can. They've got to buy Yes, we're going to be joined by a shark expert. Not to talk. The white pointer is imports heat, but more bull sharks and the attacks are on the rice. We're going to dive into it next here. On nov the twenty.

Seven year old surfer had been in the water for just seconds when he was attacked by the bull sharks. More shark attacks over the last forty eight hours. All right, Oh that is frightening, especially right in the middle of summer.

It is terrifying. Melissa Markeures is a shark expert from Science and Technology Australia. She joins us this morning.

Hello, melt that time, No, thanks for having me.

So, look, we're hearing all these shark attacks up me in New South Wales. How do we need to be here in Victoria? Especially Melbourne.

Look, the perfect storm has kind of happened here in Sydney in regards to all of the rain that we've been having, and it's rained too. It's all the bites have been linked to bull sharks, and so bull sharks love to thrive in warm, murky waters and harbors and estuaries, and your guys' cult or water just makes it less suitable for bull sharks.

So you don't have kind.

Of the recipe for this perfect storm down there.

So in Port Phillip Bay where we are here in Melbourne, you'd be familiar with it. Do we have any sharks you know? Have there been any signings? I know there was a some form of shark down Port Seaway.

Yeah, I mean, look, shark activity is a natural occurrence. If there's an ocean, more likely than not there is some sort of shark in the area. We just happened to coexist with them a lot more peacefully, more so than not. So chances are the probably sharks there, you just haven't had to deal with them.

So hearing on the news there's been four people bitten by sharks in four days makes me go, I'm never going to the beach again.

That's me.

I'm hanging up my snorkel. I'm never going back. Should we be scared going to the beach?

No, I mean, look again, it's these kind of like what's happened recently.

Obviously it's very very scary sounding and.

It's very tragic, but it's because of this rainfall that we had that has created kind of this environment for these book sharks to really thrive and be in the area and so on a normal kind of day, No, it's it's just your your regular kind of risk.

Similarly, excuse my ignorance. So I'm taking my boat out right on Sydney Harbor. I'm manifesting it and I want to jump in the water. Is there ever a telltale sign that there is or could be a shark around around me or around the water, or is it just sort of.

Chance.

Well, I mean, probably the most telltale sign is the fin. So if you see a fin, probably don't going.

Is there anything that any idea exactly that?

Yeah, exactly that.

So if you see a lot of those small silvery fish, those bait balls around, they're congregating quite closely. If they're jumping, Especially if you see a lot of fish jumping around, maybe something underneath they're chasing them. If you see other people kind of fishing around and maybe throwing some of the scraps overboard as well, that might be something that

Times of the day to avoid swimming is sunrise, dusk.

And dawn. My mam Alwhites told me. Was she right or wrong?

Yeah? Pretty much.

Dusk and dawn are when a lot of these sharks are active, but we are seeing some of them be a bit more active during the daytime as well. So really it's just being conscious of your environment. And conscious of your swimming, so you know, always have your swimming buddy, check your environmental arounds, make sure you know that you don't have somebody fishing upstream from you, or you don't have, you know, a dead floating whale by you.

Take a swim buddy. Someone that's a busy got more mate on the bones, like someone looks more appealing. I would suggest we look at me. I'm just talking to you.

I'm not looking at Melissa. The sharks at the aquarium, are they stoned?

It's really well fed.

I tinted. They seem quite friendly. Are they on the gummies or are they gummy shots?

I mean that you're gonna have to ask the.

Aquarium fishery people and see what their diet is.

But they look very well fed.

And I kind of want something you you mentioned before, laws that your mom told you don avoid. There's and look, Melissa Markeres is a shark expert. She's joining us on the air this morning. I've got a question for you. This is it's not a wise time. My dad told me, he said, sharks attracted to fear. You pee yourself when you're scared. Don't swim near kids at the beach because they always pee in the water. Is that true? I should avoid swimming near kids because they attract the sharks.

I mean maybe you want to avoid swimming the other kids because it's.

It's less peaceful and swimming by the kids.

No, I think, you know what, I think there's been studies that are not like scientific. I think it's been something about like Shark Week is done and stuff like that to double check if.

Pee attracts sharks. And I don't think that was conclusive whatsoever. So feel free to pee in the water if you are.

And what about one of my friends who's a surfer told me, if you have a yellow surfboard, it puts the sharks off.

If you have a red surfboard, they're attracted to it. Is that true? Are they attracted to certain colors?

I mean we've heard of the whole like yum yum yellow scenario. I've never heard of the bottom of a surfboard being read though or yellow. But I do know that they're coming up with surfboards with like bars on them, like lines on them to break it up as a shark mitigation kind of experiment, to see if that's something that kind of puts sharks off of biting surfboards.

What about those shark bands on Instagram? What it's like a magnetic band or something that you say some surface, Well, do they work?

Some of them do have shown actually to work against sharks, not all sharks, but some of them. For individual sharks, it will actually pel them because of that electric kind of force field that has. I think WA actually has a sort of government scheme that if you buy one, like of a specific one that's been scientifically tested, they'll give you some like remade money back.

And then if one comes me, do you just punch them in the nose?

Like Mike Fanning, have you ever tried punching anything underwater? Like if you go for the no, you might either completely miss or you might end up like in their mouth.

I go for the gills, go for those little.

Slits on the next because that's like punching something like in the chest, and that would probably work.

A lot better. He stabbed him in the eye.

He's that available.

Sure you don't go randomly stabbing sharks.

Glad that you jumped on for this to talk about the shot Glad?

I mean, I didn't think I was going to be talking about sharks being like, hi, but it's been a.

Great way to start the morning.

But seriously, though, because people's killed the shots.

Shot no look write wats and stuff, but I think can well, we can't be.

Calling the shots, can we.

So so it's been shown that calls do not work in regards to the aim that everyone kind of like hopes to and to be honest, sharks are significantly less dangerous in reality than they're perceived by the public. You know, globally there's about seven to one hundred unprovoked shark attacks annually. Think about how many people go into the water.

Those are really really low risks, no cuts.

I mean, look if they start showing up in your local parks and taking up parking spots and like Poli standing a chat about that, but right now you know that's their environment.

Or on a pool table, Oh that was terrible, the.

Pool sharks are taking all of your money.

There we go, Melissa Shark expert joining us on the Thanks time this morning, mate.

Thanks Melissa, or is my pleasure have a good one?

We should be feeding you to the stone sharks with.

We went to the tennis last night. Clinton and I both went separately, not together. First of all, the men's Now, I always thought the women played first. What's this business about putting the men first.

It's controversial, isn't it.

It's TV.

It was it's it's TV TV dictates.

So it was Yannick Sinner number two.

Se he is chasing back to back to back titles.

Love Yannicks in he has.

A demon or going.

The demon.

He got through action today?

Now, yeah, were you in action last night?

Sure?

Was?

So.

Just turned your order a brecky rat, which is always the sign of age.

I had sixteen cocktails in the rolf Lauren sweet last night. Thank you for that. Not good thirty A.

Lovely Grand Slam cocktail, which is like a lemon thing. It tastes like remember the lemon study from our year early days, tastes like lemon study. We must go and sorry, we digress.

So we went to watch Yannix Inner, who is the redheaded Italian who I love.

He must be seven.

Foot the fox. Second, he's very tall, and.

He played Hugo Guston French player, who is I think, like the ninety eight said in the world anyway you go after the second set, just walked off. There was no explanation of sort happened in the court, had an upset tummy and he just he said, I'm out see your exposed.

People living on the it's a planet.

It would have been good enough, but it's unfortunately not good enough against the two Times defending each other.

Oh no, I mean out of nowhere.

Oh, I don't even think the crowd realized that it's happened. For some of them here, they are going to be massively disappointed with that and left.

Yeah, I mean, he's unwell, the poor thing. But also I was like, oh, these poor people would have bought tickets to see you only get you don't get, And I was like Channel nine would.

Be oh, yeah, they should have played our alarm We've got, which is like.

Whoop whoop situation?

Is there a little Tommy Roblade just left?

Anyway, then things went real kokie time for the women's Naomir Saka who is she's quirky?

Yeah, and the two Times strain open chapters.

Yeah, she did this thing where you know, she did like the walk out, but it was like a full fashion set up.

She had a veil. She had a huge white veil.

She had a butterfly on it, which represented the butterfly that landed on her legs.

You haven't seen it.

She looks like one of the EPs lady.

She looks like a white lady funerals woman.

So she's sorry, she's going to get the umbrella down, so she put.

She puts the parasol down. She takes her veil off, and then she puts on.

For it is we always you'd want to win? After that, well, what an entrance. It was a long skirt to be playing shirt.

No, she takes them off and then she puts on. It was four thousand degrees in there.

She put on this.

Fluffy jacket for the warm up and hang on, here she go. She takes her skirt off and puts her flares on the entrance.

So she later said that Nike, she had to get special permission from Nike to design this with that with a renowned designer.

You know what she did, so I obviously went straight on the ground. She cleared her entire Instagram, so there was not one single other post up there except for a commercial she'd done with this designer, and it just said one of one.

Yeah, she says afterwards, it's modeled on a jellyfish. She must love jellyfish.

Jellyfish.

It's amazing Robert One.

He has worked with likes a Beyonce, Cardi b and Ariana Grunde.

Now, when then she put the jacket on.

Look like a camera outfit that a sniper wear, just like what on am I in Paris or am I on rod laver Arena?

What is going on?

And that gorgeous chirped the game trying not to laugh. I mean, it's iconic, good honor. The issue was that she lost the first set, and it was like if you wonder why if you do that and then you lose, you'd be so embarrassed. But but then Jace in the second.

Set, I'm sorry, that's ridiculous.

In the second set there was an issue, a tech issue, and they had to go off court for like twenty minutes because the chair umpires did he get stuck? It was lit up like if you hit a foul express and that they got a guy out there like well there's a technical isshoe and this guy just ran out and like unplugged it and plugged it back again.

That'll do it. Mix it?

So what's next for a sacle that's a statement like do we repeat that? Because at the US Open last year she famously was she was bringing out gigantic lea boo boo dolls under court with her. So there must be something else it's coming.

She must be getting back. She would have wanted ten million bucks for that.

Surely you know what she needs more people.

Than ever googled her and that outfit last night.

She now needs a Melbourne designer and some Melbourne inspiration, like a Melbourne theme.

What could she she dress up at.

The Jellyfishes Fair Melbourne?

He gets on your couple up so down there to put her in an mc g dress or something.

What about that big yellow cheese thing that when you come over the outro Tullermarine, the French big friend come out as as a tram, come out as a tram a Mikey.

I just think it's a bit, isn't it.

Do you know what? All the basketball players do it? Why can't she do it? No one criticizes the.

Men super Bowl that sort of thing dress up.

I mean, God knows they need more money. They're doing it tough, unbelievable how much money? May I hope she does something else, and I feel like she'll only do it in the early round.

I'd like you to come dressed like that tomorrow to the radio show as a tram, the white lady funeral outfit, putting your little hat down, trying to get your headphones on.

Over there, she covers the tram.

Good Morning Melbourne, that is cold Play sky Full of Stars. Just go and court it a wait here on over one hundred. You're on the air with Jason Lauren Clinton as well, and we've got more cash to go. This morning eight o'clock we're going to be doing the five K question.

Jason Lawrence, tell me what's you know?

One of our favorites is back for twenty twenty six. We like to do Probe the Pope. Every couple of weeks we catch up with a new area of the Victorian Police. But our resident Friendly Cop and Police Officer of the Year intended Wait, cheesy chase.

Cheesy Police Officer of the Year. Now, what did you have to do to get that award?

Well, I think I dropped a box of rocks.

Gets you the press conference.

I'd like to think it was awarded to me on behalf of all the police that work the demonstrations, you know, week in week out. That's that's how I took it. I was embarrassed to get it, to be honest to its mother. Candidates for some reasons that weren't able to get it this year, but I accepted on behalf of all those members all working.

Cheese is such a man of the.

People, and we've sat off the air before when chatting about you ago. You're one of those leaders where people would not want to let you down. You don't seem like a bloke that'll be there yelling at the troops. It's more just I.

Guess I am a people person. I probably should be a little bit more strategic at my rank, but I think with all the challenges we have, I think it's really good to be focused on people and you know, trying to support them. And that's that's how I do it.

It was very professional in his radio interview yesterday about winning police officer. You take a listen to.

This main cheeseman. You're allergic to cheese. You can't believe this, so during COVID. During COVID, I became anaphylactic allergic to goats, cheese, halloomy and fetter cheese, three of my favorites. My wife thinks are hilarious. She goes, if you ever die of cheese. She goes, imagine the funne I'll have you know, can get your funeral with a eulogy.

There is our hard police Officer of the year. You're allergic to cheese.

So during COVID we've got a pizza from our normal pizza place. Ding up in the shower, I'm scratching. I ended up in the hospital. Really, I'm allergic to cheese or certain cheeses all of a sudden.

And they're three of the best. Hallooei gone better, Maria, Oh my god.

Don't actually play on a radio station that question. That's sort of question we ask what.

Question?

They're just as stupid as us.

But I like, how seriously are about it? Cheese? When you're allergic to cheese?

The congratulations? Do you get a trophy or do you get an extra stripe on your shirt?

What happens?

I get I get a lunch. I get a lunch with my wife at a winery. I can bring friends, of course, they're always welcome.

Good hey, cheese.

The world is a bit of a different place when we speak to you the year than it was last year because of the events of Sydney BONDI it was just a shocking, heart wrenching, you know, just a terrible, terrible event. It's a bit of a game changer nationally, but also here in Victoria. How does it change the game for police and for the community here in Victoria.

So as you can imagine, all their partner agencies work closely together on a whole range of things, including after the bond I was shooting, So we had more awareness around synagogue's Jewish community areas, we increased our visibility and patrols. We also did the same with the mosques and some of the Muslim locations. There's a lot of dialogue with leaders from both communities. I guess from my end, you know, there's just this lack of compassion for humanity that I'm

So long arms, what like a rifle like a rifle.

So in order to stop the threat and stop the killing, which is what we're training to do, you have to get closer and closer because you've got the handgun. So we just have a position where we bring out the long arms as a precaution, nothing more than a precaution.

So what we'll see police officers around the a carrying these.

So they are around the outside of the AO, they're not inside with the long arms. We thought it the cricket as well. The public feedback has been really good.

A lot of people in the.

Police, a lot of people want the photo. It's it's similar all around the world, but it's just part of our They have the kit anyway in their cars. Our critical instant response seems to do a terrific job and have got great training. But it's now more visible. It's just the changing dynamics of I'd rather see it too, Yeah.

I mean it's sad that we've had to come.

To these, yeah, but absolutely an enhanced police presence definitely makes people feel safer.

I know that's snipers.

Big events like the tenders I.

Saw in New South Wales. Dad snipers out when they did the ceremony down at BONDI a week later. We're not going to see stuff like that around Victoria, are we.

No, there's no deployment of snipers. We just have the long arms out as a I guess there's an overt presence to let everybody know that we're prepared, Not that we want to be prepared, but we have to be prepared, and it gives us another to get our kick bag to respond and.

She's we have a huge Jewish community here in Melbourne, particularly around sort of Saint Kilderese core Field area, which even just last night we've got two men on the run after hurling abuse at a group of Jewish teens.

Look, Laura and I were just watching the footage before on the news. These kids were running.

The group, driving inside a stolen you you know, what can what assurances can you give the community on behalf of vic Pole.

I guess in relation to how the Jewish community in Melbourne and Victoria they have the full support of Victoria Police, and I think leading up to BONDI, you know, there was a lot of protest activity. There was a lot of I guess ill feelings towards the Jewish community for something that was happening overseas right here. I think the tide has changed a little bit since it's changed a little bit, and I think in relation to the latest

I know, I know you're speaking gently, but that's beyond kids being idiots. That's just absolutely disgraceful. They're in a stolen car. I mean, every time we see things like this, people just wake up with their blood boiling. It's just disgraced, not acceptable.

Hey, we've got to take a break, but we're going to open the phones. If you're up for at thirteen twenty four ten. If you've got a question for cheesy, our friendly cop can be. It can be something as hard hitting as last time when Clint wont to know if he could be fine for eating pineapple while driving.

Well, clearly not because no time came in the mail.

Isn't that a good feeling?

Did you actually ask that question?

Yeah? I think you asked it on my behalf. Yeah, you will worry that the cameras were going to think this a legitimate thing.

I was being healthy and eating pineapple, and.

I swear it wasn't a phone. It was it. It was it was pineapple.

Oh, just don't be distracted Clint by the juicy pineapple.

Thirteen twenty four ten. If you've got a question for Cheesy our friendly cop, give us care all it over. Cheesy our Friendly copp is in the building, ready to take your questions. Thirteen twenty four ten.

Mark for the police Officer of the year. Thank you.

I apologize, Cheese Police Officer of the Year.

Have some respect.

Look embarrassed. He We're about to get to some cracking questions on the phones first though.

Yeah, for some breaking news. An incident overnight which sounds absolutely horrendous in Q, A bit of a stabbing attack.

Was it cheese.

It's a really sad incident and unfortunate. It's reflective of I guess the knife crime that we're seeing, you know, in this state, and I implore people who are carrying knives please please consider your actions and the life changing moments and decisions that can make. We have an eighteen year old girl coming home after a night out with a friend. She gets dropped off at a residence in

Just a young girl coming home from a night out.

Just a young girl who was minding her own business, walking home, you know, in the safety of her own driveway. The offender is known to us. We haven't caught him yet.

He's known to the police.

Oh, he's known who. We know who he is now he doesn't. I don't know if he's got a background, but we know who. I would ask that person if he's listening, you know, please hand yourself in. You've made a really poor choice or really bad decision, and we need to hold you accountable for that. But we don't want any more people hurt. So if you could hand yourself in, that would be that would be very good.

Cheese.

You've been a police officer officer for a long time and you would have seen some horrible things, but hearing something like this it must shake you to your course still. After all of these years of being a police officer.

It's funny how things, how things stay with you over the years. And I guess you see. I guess you see the best, the worst and everything in between of life. And sometimes you wonder how inhumane humans can be, and how an eighteen year old boy can, for whatever reason, think that it's okay to approach a girl he knows and stab here multiple times in her own home is really sad and I don't know how people get to that point.

Well, our thoughts are very much with that family and all of that community and friends. This morning shocking, shocking news.

On a lighter note, there was an exercise carried out by the Tactical Response Group yesterday here in Melbourne.

It was it ansex station at antex stations, so right.

Because a lot of people saw this.

It was on social and people were panic saying what's going on, So.

There was a lot of communications in the lead up, so there was letter drops on houses, there were signage up. We put things on our eye Watch page. Our Special Operations Group who are at the top of the tree in relation to threat response and they're excellent what they do. They have to exercise to improve their skill sets all the time and work with other agencies liking this on

So setting off like what small explosions and I.

Don't know what the exercise involved, but it was an exercise in relation to an emergency response s og.

I got a made of mine who's a PSO operator, and he said sometimes they go and like out to the training facility and they get to play the role of victims or the public for the songs to practice.

On practicing for all these emergency exercises and emergences. It's a big part of what we do, just so that we're always you know, ready in case we have to.

So if you did see that, because this is the thing with social media now, you might not have got a letter box drop, but you see it on the socials and people Pani, Yes, of course, nothing to worry about.

The training.

We should sign up for that, like go out to their training facility and you know, yes we should.

I am a grandson of a police officer, so I'd be very good at it.

Jason, No, no, no, no, no, We're not the car like like i'd be operating the the fake server. Are you coming in through? No? God, no, no? Hey Mark in South Yeah, right, you've got a question for the cheese. Oh hi buddy, Hey Mark, Thanks for.

You, Carl. Just a question of the police of the government with all the drug bus money, so all the all the money that we sees and all the assets that we sees. You'll see cars being loaded and other assets you know that you'll see from time to someone in the news. It all gets goes into if the if the person is convicted and the money is dean tainted or the assets dean tainted, it goes to the government.

Have you watched the rip yet, Benfflet watched it yesterday because that's what it's about.

It about cartels and.

Finding drug money. Well, what's the rule?

Was lost and found?

Like you know, so if you if you find something of value, you are supposed to hand it in and if there's no one comes forward after three months and then and then you become that it gets returned to you.

Was to find that three months ID feel like a long wait? When yeah, just waiting.

The government take the money spread between all of us.

Sure, Lauren, they siphon it back into the police.

Don't for cheesy Christmas of.

A couple of slabs of can't get.

Cheesy. Wait, we love you, you congratulate.

You can I just do a quick shout out to all the members of Victoria Police. And so it's going to be another challenging year. We've got We've got I think fourteen hundred vacancies now, so there's no respite from the workload. But they're all doing a terrific job. So just like I wish you and your listeners are very happy and safe new Year, I wish the same tour that my colleagues.

Yeah, let's do it every morning just after eight o'clock. We give you a chance to win five thousand dollars. Oh, we've got the fact control of joining us on the air.

Don't say that.

Wayne from Kill you are a train conductor.

Good morning, Yeah, morning guys.

How are you all?

Yes?

I am, and I'm out walking the dog and what a days?

Oh Wayne, you're a little bright, little spark this morning, aren't you?

Yes, I am thanking Joy.

Apologies for the fat controller comments.

Yes, So do you work at one station in particular or whereabouts?

Wayne?

Yeah?

Yeah, I work out of Southern Cross Station and travel all over Victoria.

That's a busy one.

And what sort of dog do you have? Wayne?

I have a beautiful German shorthaired pointer.

Same as me. Oh my gosh, Wayne, we're destined to be friends.

You should be able to ride the train for free, now, Lauren, I should can.

Hey, funny, I saw someone post a foo of them on the train with their dog the other day.

Are you allowed to take dogs on the train?

Ah? You are if they're in the correct carrying.

To carry. I can't just walk on with the dog.

Or if it was assistance dogs, yeah.

You can say.

It's the saying, oh dog, and you just don't know what dogs they gave you?

Why?

Alright?

The German shorthad point isn't renowned seeing dogs.

Let's point for five K, five thousand dollars?

Why Wright, he's the rules. You will hear a question, You will hear a three two one. You need to answer before the time is out. All right, okay, all right, we go Waye for five thousand dollars.

What is Lady Gaga's beauty line cold.

Three two one.

It's called house laps. I do a magnificent foundation, Wayne, Wasn't it no one this morning?

There's nowhere near it to be honest, Wayne, look back. Thanks to giving a crack, no worries.

I appreciate the chance and have a great day.

We'll see on the train everyone.

Behave you so down at Southern Cross today?

Yep, yes, stamp by the yellow line, keep an eye for Lauren. I will definitely thanks.

Thanks, you shall be the one with the dog.

Hey, guys, coming up next, Moving on, we are going to talk public v Private schools.

In fact again, what's your beef this time?

Thirteen twenty four ten is our number. Give us a ring, We will ask you a question and we need to work out. It's our favorite game. We need to work out if you went to a public or a private school. Thirteen twenty four to ten is our number. We each ask a question. We have to work out whether you're into public or private school and in return, thanks to our mates at MasterCard you you will walk away with tickets to the A twenty twenty six Friday Rod Labor Arena.

Nice.

Okay, how about this school fees? Well, private schools are expensive. That's not really the headline here, but they are. They are sort of year on year skyrocketing, like just getting more and more and more exorbitant and for so many families not nearly affordable. But it has now emerged that Victoria's Geelong Grammar, Oh, Geelong Grammar is officially Australia's most expensive private school.

More expensive than those schools in Sydney on the Hut.

Going through year twelve will cost you a grand total of fifty five thousand, three hundred and eighty dollars for one year.

But you got one kid, but you got twins. That's ridiculous. Five grand.

That is a lot of money.

What do you get for that? His breakfast, lunch and dinner included.

Want to get a lot and transfers to no bus you want to be in a transfer that's ridiculous.

Fifty five if you are if you are boarding at Timbertop by the way.

That's timber toops year eight said, and you go from ye, yeah.

It's ninety three almost ninety four thousand.

Be cheaper to get them a room down at the overtop.

Yeah, but they're like in tim Top, they go like hiking and camping and stuff.

Yeah, they're survival skills and all the rest.

That's more expensive to sleep in a tent.

Fifty five grand is a lot to pay for one year of your child's.

Educational So let's be honest, like that doesn't guarantee amazing grades.

I know, I know kids who went to college that aren't doing that well. Oh yeah, I know plenty of private school kids that aren't doing very well.

King Charles, wasn't they top tim Top?

It came out for It's like it's the best of the best, really, isn't it?

Well, he considered, it's sort of like life and survival right of passage for them.

Yes.

But if you're an employee, right, sorry, an employer, and you're looking at, you know, people on paper, do you reckon when they see like geelong grammar, they would instantly go for.

Them as opposed to someone like a stone. Not at all. It depends who you are as a human. It doesn't depends how much money.

I remember our parents have.

Yeah, I mean, look, it's been the topic of conversation in our parent chat for the last couple of years because we're going to keep going into high school. Yeah, and I'm like, look, you can pay all the money in the world and get them the nicest blazer if that kid's not in the learning, if it's a bad teacher, bad group of friends, you can get that in any Look.

And there's no doubt the facilities at those schools are incredible. They're like, they're as good as what you see anywhere in the real.

State school education these days is as good as really any other Yeah, I mean we paid I still remember at glen Waverley High where I went, we paid two hundred and twenty five dollars in school fees.

Well, there's been some inflation in the last I.

Think that absolutely has. But at the same years.

Out of you thirty no, oh, twenty five, well play twenty five yet.

Twenty five, I am twenty five years out.

What you did to graduate two thousand and one thousand oh, then you're twenty six years out two thousand oh, but you're a hy two k baby.

Jeez, that's brought me down to peg. Okay, don't don't you talk.

I'm not must be twenty I'm not getting twenty eight years out of school.

I'm not twenty eight.

When I said thirty years, you two looked at me like I had three heads.

Yeah, do you know what? It's creeping up on you as well?

I won't be looking out fortieth on the weekend. You're in the club.

I'm twenty two years out.

All right? How this game works, that ain't twenty four ten? We have to work out whether you went to a public or private school. We each get to ask you a question. Let's go do Sarah in Praigi Beard, good morning.

Good morning, morning Sarah. Okay, question each.

Okay, did you wear long socks as part of your Were you going to say that?

Okay, I'll go say did you wear a pinafour?

No?

Did your school have gates?

Oh?

Good one a gate like big?

No?

Not a just gates public big gates?

Ye? Did your school have a fifty meter pool on site? Didn't have to get on it? No?

Public?

Public? Public? Is it a public school? No?

Oh?

What school? Where do you go? Allow the whole I'm grammar in Essendon. It's got grammar in the title, but no pool we did. We did everything off campus, so we would go on a bus to all of out.

They had multiplivity, they had multiple ca.

That's a poppy in Corfield morning, poppy.

Morning poppy? Did you go to Corfield Grammar?

I did not go to Corford Grammar? Sticking on the campus. Is that how you refer to your school? Did you refer to it as a campus or just did not?

Right?

Was there some form of roundabout in the driveway like some just a roundabout for the minibus?

Maybe? No?

No, poppy was rowing an option?

Right question?

No rowing, I'm going to stick.

I'm going to public school school.

It was public school school.

Did you go to pops Glenara College?

A college, very good one, that's a good school.

No roundabouts, but you know, no rowing? Rowing? Yeah, find me at public school rowing?

And it was just a perth on the.

Boards in Footscray. Hey gann My first question? Do you did you go on an overseas excursion?

Oh?

No?

Did you have a hall or a theater?

A hole?

Jeanne?

Was your school in Footstrape? No, Jeanne. Do you have a school song? I?

Yes?

Until twenty twenty oh they dropped the school song of one.

Yeah do you wear a blazer? Gyarn?

Yeah yeah, private, private, private jarn? Did you go to private or public? I went to aivate school.

It was Saint Mary's College from twenty twenty.

Before that it was Christian Brothers.

Did it change its name?

My school became co ed because.

That's good.

Do you know?

The other thing that gets them is a motto, a school motto?

What was it?

You have to guess if I went to public or private?

Here we go? What was your modo?

Saburay or day dare to be wise?

What was yours?

Times? I said that in my lafetime zero and.

Tucking your shirt? That was our morning, Melbourne twenty four to nine. This is number one hundred of the girls in the office screaming one name this morning.

Harry, Yeah, Harry Starch.

Phili Kelly just arrived, going, oh, Friday's the day.

No, we thought it was going to be Friday yesterday, And Philly Keeley said, I'm going to have to take a day off. Really what he's going to see at home and play his new single on repeat?

And she was like, yeah, that's exactly right.

So people do that want to sit there.

He must be getting on in age now, old Harry, because he was always like he was always a teenagers, Like.

You know what's done the.

Age game twenty.

Nine, eight seven or eight twenty nine.

He's thirty one, is it?

Wow?

He's getting on in age girls and.

I are in the same decade. Wonderful. That gets me.

With the chats, young blood kids, with the chats.

I mean, more of a chance than you've got.

I don't know. I've a joid hearing that.

Eleven Am Friday, Harry Styles new single lock in for the weekend. Guys, we're playing that on repeat. Hey, Jase, you were off sick yesterday. It was just Clint today. So we discussed all the big topics when you went here, Like summer romances, holiday romances.

Do you have one? I had a pash, Yeah, a bit of a pash. I need details.

Yesterday everyone's already heard of We Were You. They were on repeat.

Any way.

No, not not Cleant in particular, but like summer romances. I mean I remember being younger and you go down to like a little beach spot like Talkie for a couple of weeks over summer, and you meete a boy or down to.

A Florida Carotel Gold Coast caravan path. Yeah.

Yeah, and you fall in love every summer anyway, a little summer romance.

Never heard anyone.

Actually, a lot of people have been hurt by them, but the heart they can be really fun too. Anyway, one of my friends or a few of my friends, as we were discussing yesterday, I had little summer flings over the summer.

Wasn't any of your friends of Pash Clint.

No, No, they're in different countries at the time. Anyway, there was a sleepover that happened at my house. The next day. I woke up and I was like, oh, they're sitting by the pool together. There was a sleepover anyway.

So they both arrived at your We've.

Been out for dinner.

A few people came back to our house in the afternoon and I went to bed.

So these two were both single, ved at your holiday place and they're staying with you.

Yeah, there was a sleepover anyway, they're lying by the pool together. I hadn't met one part of the party before, and so in the morning I did what all good friends do, and I was doing some research on the Instagram there. I was doing a deep dark Instagram stalk.

Now, can I point out Lauren can find out anything about anyone?

It is in credible.

It's better than Victoria Bull. It's an amazing skill. You should actually work part time for the cops.

I'm basically a private investigator. You know what, find any friends with single girlfriends. We're all the same, We'll find out anything.

Well, did you have digging?

I want to know about him. Didn't know much about him?

You scrolled back far enough you see what the ex girlfriend looks like?

Okay, or you might scroll you never know what you're going to find. Anyway, They're sitting by.

The pool, around the pool, and I'm lying in bed and I start scrolling. A few videos pop up, start watching a few videos.

Sorry, you were friends with the girl in this party?

Yeah?

And I'm watching these videos and you know, sometimes when you watch a video and the audio doesn't work, and you're like tapping it, and you're like and sometimes if you tap it, it double taps it and it likes it when you think you're on muting it.

Well, no, I didn't do that. I just kept trying to turn the volume up. Was working.

Next video, that little audio the little volume button got them right.

Then you can activate accidentally. Sometimes your phone's on silent. That's why anyway I get a message saying, what the hell are you doing in there? My phone was connected to the bluetooth around the pool where they dang feet, where they were lying, and he would have that voice.

That's someone from my past.

His videos from two three, four years ago in some instances, and then I realized. I was like, oh, my godfather, I'm gonna have to fake my own death. It's the only way I'm gonna have to climb out a window and leave my own house. So I just went pretended. I went back to sleep until they let said to.

Paul, I can't come out, No one, absolutely not, And.

I just pretended. I went back to sleep. I closed the door, the blunt are down, and I was like, no, I'm sleeping.

Tell him. I took a sleep with them.

Just that moment, that moment you realize why the audio is not coming through.

It actually was reminiscent of a cartoon where you see those bulls with steam coming out of their is. That's what I felt. I was like, I'm so hot, I'm in a blow agasket.

Well imagine how he felt He's like, that's the voice of God.

No, he would have gone to his mates and gone, they're watching my videos.

They're into me.

How far back did you?

I went?

Really archives God, summer flingover.

Not my business. I don't even know who he is.

I am back for day three. Thank you to you and Clint for holding down the thought. Yesterday. I was a little bit un well.

When I got the call saying he's not coming in. I was like, no, he's going to turn up with a marching band or something ridiculous.

We're waiting for about somewhere.

Well, yeah, my wife ended up grabbing the kids and going down to Mornington for a couple of days.

So I had the house yourself like he's had a he's knocked himself out.

Everyone thought I went off and just did an absolute blinder on.

Myself, convinced you didn't trust me.

I didn't. But I was listening to some bits from the show yesterday's bits. Yeah, it didn't take me long. Can't joking. But there was a comment that one Lauren Phillips made and you actually was.

Actually go back and listen to our show without you use psycho.

Absolutely not. I just saw a social video online where you're talking about the ins and outs, so twenty times.

Yeah, we want to know your ins and outs, because yesterday it was out Jason in Clint.

We had laugh headphones with cables in. I'm all for itsing.

You don't lose the ones with the card What about.

The big ones? They're fine, They're good.

Now I end up looking like the no over boy.

When you can't take a call on those unless you have a gaming headset with the microphone line.

That's then all of a sudden, you've got a gaming chair. Anyway. You also did make this comment.

Dick togs in speedos, men in speedos. I don't care how old you are, what shape you are?

Where this speedos?

You don't care what shape you are, what size you are?

Thanes what why are you putting on showing me your speedos now?

Like?

Are you supposed to shock me? I spent all summer with you in those dts you did.

These are new ones. These got big cockatoos on them.

Small cockatoos. Looks at them?

Is the brody executive producer comes to me and goes C Clint had an idea off the back of yesterday, Like you guys come in with your speeders and I'm like, I'm like, of course Clent was all.

Up, but also I spent he was my sponsored child over summer he came and lived.

Around.

So these are the big cockatoos. I had the big chilies.

You had the big chilies, small little kalapenos.

The rest of the show this you stopped touching yourself around. Show me from the backside. Smugglers.

Smugglers, they're a bit toy. They're very toy on the glutes, on the glue because thirty twos, I'm usually I'm usually thirty four, so I've got But.

That's the trend, isn't it where they're more.

Like the pants around the ankles for me can wear their DT's and the speedo's, but not with socks and pants around your ankles.

Do you do this? You do the same with truck in the door? Is how we now?

I reckon fellas, get him out.

Just have some body positivity.

We don't know.

We don't want to see the coat with Albo.

Everyone's talking about us at the tennis last night with all the gully Pops and the boys too. To be honest, everyone is talking about the David Victorian, Brooklyn Becker saga.

I heard Christie Swan talking about this yesterday with Jack.

The memes on Instagram was so wonderful, So for.

Anyone living under a rock, the oldest son has come out pretty much rippen into the family on the ground.

Yeah, we spoke about it at length yesterday.

He did like six page Instagram post about how his parents are basically ruined his life and ruined it, trying to ruin his marriage and so his distance himself.

He doesn't want to reconcile.

And part of it said that his mother hijacked his first dance with his wife, Nicola, and she danced so inappropriately.

Is never he intimated that she was like grinding.

Yeah, we just said it was inappropriates.

Anyone's seen footage.

I've seen the memes.

The memes it.

Means like every drunk mom at their son's wedding like dancing around the dance floor. The meme from uh Someti's glorious. Also, he also said that she she was supposed to make the dread the wedding dress, and she pulled out at the eleventh hour.

He said.

Now holes are popping up in his statement because an interview has resurfaced from just after their wedding, where her stylist in the interview, which was in twenty twenty two, said, we worked for over a year with the Valentine the team at Valentino to create her dream wedding dress, so she didn't pull out at the eleventh.

Are we believing everything? Are you team Brooklyn or team Victoria?

I trust you to go with Victoria.

I love it.

I'm team Brooklyn.

Trust you to go.

Okay?

Well, I am a I love an underdog. That's why I'm team Harry. He's in William versus Harry, so I'm going to go Brooklyn as well.

You can't find me in Basco. Though she does sound a bit psychotic. According to these.

Parts, you think she's grinding against her son on the dead if.

She's grinding, but surely there.

Mum's grinding on you at the wedding. That's a that's a flag. That's a red flag.

Have possibly been dirty dancing. It's just you just can't do that to your son.

That's what she did. David would have said, no, well, he's probably grinding something else, Sir David as well.

Can you imagine the in law. It's what they were thinking that is postpys and she's.

Grinding against my now son in law and she was too busy to make my daughter's dress.

She's practicing her dirty dance moves. That's why.

Imagine that, Oh my the mother in law.

The mother in laws would hate each other. Imagine Nicholas's mother and father.

And stop right now, thank you very much.

Need somebody with a human touch. Maybe she did a fast sirl song.

We've heard from the Beckhams.

So David Beckham's been out and about. He had a media of it, like I mean, everyone's refreshing their it's around feed non stop, trying to see if they make a statement.

But he was at an event yesterday.

And economic forum in Switzerland.

Betty regretted going to that.

Yeah, he was talking about kids on social media. It's wow, bad timing for that, David. He's what he had to say.

They make mistakes. Children are allowed to make mistakes. That's how they learn. So that's what I tried to teach my kids. But you know you have to sometimes let them make those mistakes as well.

He doesn't mean major advice.

Well, what about the drunk mother in law at the wedding who also makes mistakes when she bumps and grimes. Yeah, now there is no way that there is not a video of their wedditsh he is going to have to release the tapes.

No offense I could see is having a few at your upcoming wedding and yeah, but having a.

Dance with She would never and he wouldn't cope with it either. Or my brother, My brother would like tongue for kick her off.

About Jase talking about Liz grinding.

Great, what I love is it wasn't she would never because she's not that sort of person. It's she would never because people wouldn't react well, like my brother in law, my Fields.

Yeah, that there's got to be a tape. Release the tapes Brooklyn, if it really happens.

We want to send the gundapes Jason Lauren Clint here as well. Possible showers later on this afternoon and then the rest of the week Blues Scars Sunshine because.

At Melbourne you can a long weekend, you.

Can kill off this summer and this long weekend at fun Field's Theme Park, Victoria's was but one day holiday destination, thrill slides and endless fun await at fun Field's Theme Park. I'm a big fan of the little lazy river. They got there. It's good, it's not bad. What do you call it? There? Slides? Slides?

Jase likes the lazy river.

What do you do?

You just sit in there in the ring yep.

And then if you come around the bend, the kids are like, oh, cool, cool, I'm about to get a ring. And then you go, now I'm doing another lap.

Oh you have to hand them over.

You don't have to go around again.

You don't like sharing?

No, I'm happy to share.

He's going to be very, very hot.

Luck you have a swimming pool, Jason, you'll have great little.

Hotter than it is outside. Turn the heater off.

He had it on thirty eight degrees.

I accidentally left it on, yes yeah, thirty eight degrees. And on that forty degree day?

Why you were cook yesterday? You gave yourself a chill from being too hot in the pool.

Third degree bends.

You put chlorine in your pool? Or are you one of those people that just doesn't look after it?

And then every I'm for anal in the pool. Wow, that's doing I mean with the pool, with the pool, can well please that we're gonna need that crab?

No excuse me.

Maybe that didn't come in.

That's the promo for the rest of the year.

Now with the pool, I mean.

Not much coming back from that.

You know what is throwing.

All sorts of parties in his house, if anyone.

If that's if that's what was going down, I would have been sick yesterday to.

Thank you for for a little bit, because we're just getting the replace.

We're not going to think.

I meant absolutely getting around you said.

Do I look after the pool? My point is.

Say it again, Do you let the pool get like overgrown with my story?

No? No, I'm I'm I'm very particular. Of course, we all with the pool, like I make sure the levels are right and we don't have to do you know what the grabs not.

I don't know if we can.

Sorry, you have to listen, not only listening to that, but you had to visualize.

It's my problem.

I'm just in the forty degree pool, ben over to test the water with the strips.

Stop saying, bend with the strips, talking like you know. The show needs to end immediately.

Hunting Jason's career just.

Catch him on only fans anyway.

The point is feel free to swim. The water's fine, it's all tested. The p H is perfect.

We need just just a little you know what, kids keep out, Let's play it.

Come on, come on, I'm for an with you know. I'm full.

It's thank you for these and Lauren.

Lauren wake up feeling good following them on the socials.