Bonus: Ross Noble Was Bitten By A Shark

What about favorites to see introducing our Nick's kiss.

He's an English funny man or a funny englishman.

Either way, he's funny, he's English and he lives here in Melbourne.

I just got married to an Australian. Most people swear like you wouldn't, but look at them coughing already over there blood because that's how my wife talks. Please, welcome to the show. It's novel morning. That's quite an old clip that I've been married for a long time. So yeah, anyone always just got married? Can I just say I'm still more the same one? Any One thinking I've gone.

Off shore and your girl dad?

I am?

The girls too?

Weird? Yes?

What is it how the girls accent?

It's weird because when we moved over they all sounded like Helen and bottom cart father. What a marvelous day. Yeah, I got them just in time.

It was so Australian, isn't it.

Can I just say it, thank you for playing Bonnie Taylor just before he was introduced, there's a there's a mashup. I didn't expect how old?

What's old is new again?

Wrong?

Bonnie Taylor and David Getta, I know no he's a he's a he's a happening. Indeed, I believe the young people say she is an old Welsh lady.

How old would Bonnie Tyler be? Now that's a google job's.

Going to be in our seventies. Oh, there's a there's a quiz for everyone.

How old?

I reckon? She's seventy she's seventy three?

Wow?

Have you know?

Is she still holding out for a hero?

She's still holding out for a hero?

She turned seventy four two months ago, so I was one off.

Yes, she seventy four in June.

She's still clubbing.

Sorry, just he doesn't want to talk about himself.

I want to talk about Bunny because she's an old Welsh woman. Did he like? Surely? David just took the track and remixed it. She's not coming in from the night, She's all right right door door, don't worry about that. I come down to be so we'll go down there be nice.

Holding on for heroes, holding out.

For here, watching lots on her Friday on Fridays.

I mean, if she is holding out for here, she is held out for a long time. Seventy four, seventy four, seventy four, How.

Old's David half half that fifty Yeah, David, that's a live Google place.

Before we get to your comedy show. There is something I need to ask you.

He's fifty seven?

Is he good Lord? David? David good d Come into my room, Bunny, come in? Is he French?

There?

One hundred and is he French? He's French? Mapes or so? Well? You wouldn't believe how slow yip. Oh, I've been doing it longer than you, David. Oh my lord, I needs some visual dream.

The one that went with.

Makes Lovely Pants. No, that's Calvin Klain. I've got him confused.

Yes, sorry, j You're gonna like this appeared on a lot of TV shows. I just got informed you went on some show in the UK where they get a bunch of UK celebrities and throw you in the water with shut the Day.

I've never ever heard of this celebrity in.

Well, yes I did. Yeah, So it was one of

But where are you in the ocean or pool like an aquarium.

It was a skip. It was lit. They filled a skip full of water. They placed the celebrity into the skip was in the ocean. I'll tell you what it was. It was in the Bahamas. And I was like, what why would I want to do a celebrity shark thing? And she went, it's three weeks in the Bahamas. I'll do it. Celebrity gets eaten instead of I got bitten by a lemon shark.

Lemon.

Yeah, they like, that's not enough, it's not enough for just a little nip. I got bitten by as just a small one. It got on the back of the leg. The bump could have been worse. Well that is true. Oh yeah, good lord, we were in were steep water, stitches were talking. No, it was I was wearing a wet suit, so it just it didn't it didn't break the skin, but it.

Was enough to That's not it was how many times have you been?

I'm just saying, if he's gonna shot that story around that he's been bitten by shark, I think you need to be.

So you're saying that if teeth, if teeth applied pressure, that's not a bit.

If there's no puncture through the wet suit, I reckon, that's that's a bump, no.

Puncture, not a bit. Well that's worth knowing for when you're being caught, you're in a fight in a pub. There was no puncturing, no bite. So yeah, so I went and one with these massive, these massive tiger shark would.

Be Were you scared?

You know what? I'm not. I wasn't because I'm an idiot. No. It was one of those things where no, it's just it was it was really exciting.

And then are you scared of anything?

Yeah?

Yeah, like not us, it's just general not people. Yeah yeah, yeah. If I had been diving and there had been a bloke down there with a knife, just you know that. You know those guys that you say wobbling around.

We are in Melbourne.

I never put them.

In the Yeah, or if I was, say, I was the caretaker at a local tobacconists in Melbourne. Scared there but sharks, sharks. It was amazing and it turns out it turns out that sharks are massively misunderstood and they're really important.

Yeah. Look, I think you could do the shark game in the Bahamas, but I don't think you could be doing it here in Australia.

Aggressive, great ones we've got.

I want to do it here. I want to Yeah.

Did you say that guy yesterday that got Yeah, that would if it had got his wet suit, Well wouldn't.

That's not a I would hardly recommend it. Not getting bitten swimming Swimming with the.

Sharks shows on September six.

Yes, it is at the Palais beautiful just up here in St Kilda. What I would argue in my top five best rooms for comedy in the world. Wow, yeah, not too big.

Like for comedy rooms, you know how sometimes intimate like intimate venues are perfect.

Oh my god, it's it's just the sounds of me is in. It's not too big, not too small, it's perfect.

What's your five ross live venue in the world.

In the world, I would sort of, I would say that's probably there's probably about five that are all kind of inter changeable. Poladium, Olympia and Dublin here. Yeah, probably there. The audience yeah, oh absolutely no, seriously, this is and it's a Melbourne audience as well.

So Ariustlian audience is better, yeah, said.

You know what, Australian audiences are incredibly laid back. But at the same time, so like some places you go to, you'll get an audience that's sort of like London for example. They're up for it once they're there, but it's so it's such a nightmare getting anywhere.

On the right and they're in a good mood when they get there.

Yeah. So it takes about so about the first ten minutes you can see people sort of like they're ringing out there sort of stuff. You know. Well, I did a gig once and it was so the heat of the audience and the theater and then because everyone had got wet, there was steam coming off the audience.

Look like you said, a smar machine.

Or doing a gig in a sauna.

There are So I'm hosting a yeah a conference today. It's the National Finance Broker's Day.

Doesn't that sound at.

The MCG anything I should run with for that type of audience. As an opening, I.

Think you should be honest and good evening everybody. I'm here for the money. Let's let's be honest.

That'll appreciate it.

No one's doing that for the love of it.

Noble's playing Palais Theater September six. You can get your tickets through ticket Master. Ross is always good to say mate, thanks for comedy.

Thanks for having me, and I'll be back with a remix with David but just an old Welsh woman we look forward to. If there's any old Welsh woman who live in Melbourne who want to come to the Palais, I'll get you on and you can remix one of my jokes.

Lauren Wake feeling good following them on the socials