Episode 2

Previously on It Happened Here. 2024. The Weeks family is in crisis as the 2024 election approaches. Paul and his wife Ruth are struggling to keep both sides of the world. You couldn't trust anyone back then, family included. We were all trying to figure out how to survive the upcoming elections.

I kept telling myself it's four years, we can survive that. And then I started to cry uncontrollably. There was hardly anything you could bring up that didn't take a hard turn into politics, and Garrett's family lined up. I talked about trying to understand them and Ruth said she understood them perfectly, which is why she didn't want to see them.

Their son Mickey was fighting it out in the streets of DC. Whoever was macing us and beating us and shooting us and rolling over us with tanks must have believed they were saving America, just like us. When the great leader shockingly The election, the Weeks family has to face the unthinkable. What a charmed life we had in the good old USA. And now we're sleepwalking through the ashes. What I knew for sure was Our lives would never be the same. And they weren't.

Paul's brother Garrett saw where it all was headed. Up until then we could find ways to get along, but this put it right. Our faces. There are two sides and no middle ground, and we're gonna fight each other to the death.

2024, the great leader had won the election that everyone said would change the country forever. What I want to know is, did it happen right away? What did people do? Uncle Mickey, it sounds like you were the most political one in the family. The election of 2024 is over. The great leader wins. Did you just kind of give up? Me. I was all about the fight. And the progressive group I was in, we the people, was all about social justice. So I figured now we take it to the next level.

The head of the group started talking about registering voters in the African American community for the next election. I said they've taken away the elections. You think a dictator is gonna step aside in four years? This is about taking the battle back to Washington and showing these criminals we will never stop. He said

We have to take positive action and start mobilizing for the midterms. I pointed out that voter registration was delusional and we better fucking face reality. Afterwards, as Dee and I headed to our dorm room, I'm railing about how they're not seeing what's happening. She said I'm going to Detroit to register voters. I hope you'll come with me. It felt like our relationship depended on it. Paul's biggest problem used to be that too many students would sign up for his courses.

His tour de force on the sixties got so popular that They moved it to this huge lecture hall, and he had video clips and scenes from movies, and perfectly curated music, and he was on fire. I would sneak in and watch Paul take us on this thrill ride through the war and the madness.

His course politicized a lot of students who'd wished they'd been born sooner. He would tell them this is your time. This is your battle to fight. That course turned out to be his downfall with the crackdown on left-wing bias. Paul was never any good at academic politics, and he would say things to be provocative that wouldn't have mattered a year ago, but now were evidence against him.

Things got tense on the home front. My dad had his classes cut back, so he was banging around the house with lots of executive time. Watching almost as much television as the great leader. One night I woke up to singing. I couldn't figure out where it was coming from, so I went downstairs and realized it was coming from the basement. I was halfway down the steps and there was Angelica holding baby Gabriel as she sang a lullaby. She was singing so softly.

How could I have heard it up on the second floor with all the doors closed? Like everything that mattered, it was beyond understanding. Gabriel fell asleep and she put him in his cradle. We sat on the sofa together, not saying a word, and I noticed the little thing she'd done to make our basement the warmest, most inviting place in the house.

I never could have found her strength, enduring the loss of her husband, building a home with her baby in a stranger's basement in a police state where going outside could get her arrested. All I could do is hug her and hold her. And then we kissed. I think I knew Ruth was falling in love with Angelica before she did. Raising the baby with Angelica mattered more than anything else.

One little life brought into all this cruelty and madness and we could protect him and help him grow. It used to be we'd eat dinner as a family, and instead of grace, we'd each say what we were grateful for. Then Kate started saying things like, I'm grateful for oral sex. And Mickey would say, I'm grateful for skinny dipping with sorority girls. That's when we stopped being grateful before dinner.

After they moved out, I'd have to come up with something I was grateful for, which was impossible since I was in high school. Paul and I had a long, beautiful, intimate, hilarious conversation, which started the night we met at a dinner party that was turning into charades, which caused Paul to sneak out the back and I followed. We were as giddy as if we were cutting school, sitting in his car talking until a honking horn hours later meant we had to move so others could leave the party.

Now, after years and years of love and marriage and children, we had drifted into silence. I had more to say, but I couldn't say it to Paul. Where were the experts to analyze the data in the black box marriage to determine why it crashed?

Maybe it came down to pilot error, preceded by years of neglect. But leaving that house was an emotional kill shot. One day I'm living in a cozy house with people I love, and the next I'm unpacking my suitcase in a downtown rooming house, opening a refrigerator where people label their food. At first, I kept to myself, but my fellow exiles were a generally friendly bunch.

finding divine hilarity in their free fall into the abyss and nurturing unlikely dreams of a return to normalcy with prodigious drinking in the living room. After a few rounds of cocktails, it felt almost like family, except we didn't know each other well enough to cause real pain. Like drunks since the beginning of time, we'd try to top each other with our tales of misery. I was in bad shape, but the competition was fierce.

With the family breaking up, what was it like for you, David? My dad moved out. So my life wouldn't get disrupted. Good plan, Dad. So I had to get past the weirdness of visiting him in his rooming house at two seventy-six Brook Street. He'd made friends with this guy, Ted, who was in his sixties with a big laugh, a few lonely teeth, and three or four ex wives who'd called to remind him of all the ways he'd failed them.

My dad would hang out with Ted on the porch with their drinks, competing about who had the darkest take on the news. The university cut back my course load, but I still had my legendary course on the sixties. I wanted my students to face what was being lost, but They had everything they'd always had. Parties, gym access, friends, fraternities, sororities.

a bottomless bank account, Netflix, football games, gut courses, and an awesome forgiving God to watch over them when Daddy was glamping in Cabo with his work wife. It was their self-satisfaction that infuriated me. I told them, This entire class is a trigger warning for future devastation. And yes, there's a safe space waiting for you. It's your coffin when you die. Until then, everything is dangerous.

Relationships and jobs and friends and holding on to your humanity, and you'd better embrace the danger because this is what life is. Most of them looked annoyed, wondering if this would be on the final.

I left the progressive group We the People because they were living in a dream world where democracy will magically return if we want it badly enough. By that time, I was involved with another group, which must remain nameless, determined to smash the university's complicity with our authoritarian government. The great leader's plan to destroy the environmental movement was straight out of his extremely limited playbook.

He'd announce something ignorant and indefensible, humiliate his followers into supporting it, demonize whoever didn't, and make it a loyalty test. Half the country would spit out their mochalates in horror. and the other half would delight in their horror. His big idea was to sell off what remained of the national parks and open them for drilling, starting with Bears Ears National Monument in southern Utah.

A perfect choice. It had sacred Indian land, important archaeological sites, endangered species, and had been designated as a national monument by the previous president who was hated and feared for his decency. What the government was doing was obscene. We kept saying we are better than this, but every day we proved we were.

Isaac was slogging through the end of high school and I was wondering what I was doing at the U. When I heard about a festival of bears ears to protest selling off the national parks, I went to Isaac's house and made my pitch to his parents that Isaac and I should play at the festival. Why should this gentle soul with such an amazing gift get bullied at a school that won't protect him when he could be out in the world starting his life and doing something that matters? Hadley got it.

She wanted to see Isaac happy while she was around to enjoy it, and Garrett would do anything for her in the time she had left. I couldn't believe they agreed. Garrett followed me outside and said, Isaac is a lot more vulnerable than you think. And I said, Yeah, well, he's a lot stronger than you think. Uncle Garrett broke down and made me promise to protect him. I'd never seen him scared.

I didn't tell Dee what I was doing in the radical movement because it could get her busted out of school. She wanted to register people in Detroit to vote because if we scored big in the midterms, we could impeach the great leader, and that was our best hope. When I told her it would never happen, she got angry and said with all my privilege I could afford to be cynical and not do the work to actually change things. Everything I said came out wrong, which was too bad, since I knew I was right.

I didn't want Hadley to worry, so on the day of the festival at Bear's Ears I set her up with the entire last season of The Crown, while I was in the basement switching between Fox and CNN. I was hoping to see Isaac and Kate perform, but the music part of the coverage got bumped for the protest, which featured a bunch of Indians and environmentalists, and then there was a wave of regular folks protesting the protest.

Probably working class people who'd get jobs from the development of the area. The economic side tends to get lost in the yelling and screaming from the left, but there was my son Isaac right there in the middle of the damn thing.

We were knocked out by the size of the crowd at Bear's Ears. I shouldn't have been surprised more than half the country was on our side. It's just that the other side had all the power. I went in to check on Hadley and she said, you need to watch this, Garrett. You need to see what they're doing.

Screw the crown, she'd been watching the news the whole time. So my wife and I watched TV to find out what was happening to our son. We played Look What Happened to You, a favorite of literally tens of people across the nation. Then Isaac stepped up to the mic and said, I have an important announcement. I know a lot of you are worried about the fate of the world. I'm here to tell you it will be just fine. What's ending is the human race. And maybe that's better for life on Earth.

Even with his stutter, he was pretty powerful, and some people applauded the end of the human race. During our last song, fights started breaking out. But it was odd because usually there's a fight in one place and other people get involved, but this was isolated fights in different parts of the crowd that started at exactly the same time.

You can do everything right, but the fact is you're trusting your life to the actions of a mob. A mob is not rational. A mob will kill you and never feel a thing. A bunch of us from the festival were staying at a holiday in Express, and that night we converged in the breakfast room with beer and whiskey and dope, feeling lucky we'd made it out.

Nobody could believe how disciplined the opposition was. I mean, if we could organize like that, we'd overthrow the government in an afternoon and still make happy hour. There was a crazily intense freelance journalist named RJ Manning getting in people's faces and everyone was opening up to him.

I had a hunch he was working for the other side, so when he wormed his way up to me, I suggested he fuck off, and he demanded to know what was wrong with me. I told him we didn't have time to get into that with the detail it required. I was about to go back to my room when I saw Isaac talking to a lanky, long haired guy who'd been lurking around the stage as if he had a job, which he didn't.

I don't think Isaac ever had a drink, but there he was sharing a bottle of red with this mystery dude who had freeloader written all over him.

As I was getting on the elevator, this RJ person hopped aboard and he demanded to know why I wouldn't talk to him. I told him my hunch that he was working for the other side since they outorganized us and must have been getting their intel somewhere. He started talking so fast I could hardly keep up.

Yes, the ones who attacked were National Guard troops disguised as everyday Americans upset with the protest. That's what the Russians did in Ukraine. Use out-of-uniform soldiers to pose as local rebels. The great leader was stealing a page from Putin's playbook. Or, more likely, they talk strategy naked in a sweat lodge, playfully snapping towels at each other's butts since they're such friendly lads and clearly on the same side.

RJ was still there in the morning deconstructing the madness. He turned out to be the smartest person who ever sat on my bed.

So, Paul, 2025, the great leader has total power. Was it as bad as you thought it would be? In some ways, it was worse. He surrounded himself with And they jerry rigged the government so nothing could stop his worst, most psychotic impulses. We were all trapped in the revenge fantasies of a very sick man. Dee and I were in Detroit trying to get people to register to vote. Most of them didn't want to get busted for being a black voter in the Great Leader's America.

We're talking to a guy coming out of Food Giant and Dee gives him the pitch about registering to vote, and he says, frankly, lady, I don't see the point. And I blurt out, I'm with you, brother. Dee gives me a look and says our only hope is at the ballot box, and if I can't get behind that, I should leave. If I'd reached out and held her and tried to explain myself, it all might have turned out different.

But I didn't. I'm standing there in the food giant parking lot watching the best part of my life end. But man. I was so sure I was right. The next morning in the breakfast room, I worked with RJ getting people stories and building the case that the brutal organized response of the locals to our protest was actually a government-directed hit.

RJ knew his story needed to be airtight because the great leader was the most prolific liar in the history of lying, which is, of course, the history of the human race. Isaac and his new friend finally showed up, shaky and hungover. I went over to make sure Isaac was okay and he introduced me to Neil, who seemed like a guy who could wreck your life without meaning to.

Isaac was practically an adult. What could I do? I started off on a walk, and it was so crisp and clear, I found myself thinking, how many more days like this will we ever have? I went back inside and told Angelica to bundle up Gabriel and put him in his stroller. It was a huge risk being out with Angelica, but it was worth it. Everyone was out walking and jogging and skateboarding and playing soccer, and you could just feel how much we all wanted to seize this moment and hold it close.

People smiled at us and made faces at Gabriel, and we bought ice cream from the truck, and I kept thinking America, I love you to death, and you are breaking my heart. RJ was finishing his story and going back to New York. We were spending a lot of time working together, and he told me I should have my name on the story with him. And I was so surprised and touched I told him to shut the fuck up.

I drove him to the airport and he made me promise to come see him in New York. I wasn't out of short term parking before I started missing him so much my whole body ached. Back at the Holiday and Express, I told Isaac it was time to go, and for the first time I got pushback. He told me to stop acting like his mom and I said if I was acting like his mom I'd be sick and dying Which was such an awful thing to say I tried to suck it right back into my mouth.

Blurting out hideous remarks is one of the downsides of being me. He promised to come home in a week.

I had my hands full at work, but it was a blessing because it took my mind off of Hadley and Isaac. I was meeting regularly with the university administration to deal with the escalating campus radicalism, which was growing like a cancer. What made it tough? was the left wing element stirring things up. You get a bunch of eighteen year olds away from home for the first time, they can be convinced of just about any left wing nonsense. It gets more complicated when family is involved.

I had discovered potential threats which caused me great concern. What I wanted to do is tell Paul, but he would have gotten on his high horse and gone public an and I couldn't take that chance. were too high. When a week went by with no word from Isaac, I did a zoom call. He was drunk and Neil was in the room unseen. There were private jokes and laughter at my expense, which pissed me off after all I'd done for him.

He said he was playing at the roadhouse every night and building a following and people needed to let him be whoever he wanted to be. I said, Fine Isaac, but if you aren't home when your mother dies, you'll carry that for the rest of your life.

So, Terrence, 2025, the country is being kind of torn apart. Your mother is sick. Your family is at each other's throats. What was that time like for you? Like a bad dream where nothing adds up. I was sure when I deployed I'd never see my mom again, but I got back home and there she was. Smaller and paler and weaker, but every bit herself.

She suggested I take some courses at the U, but I don't need a class to feel dumb. I can do that all by myself. So I worked for a buddy with a moving company and spent a lot of lonely nights in bars. I kept hoping I'd run into someone I knew, but when I did, I wish I hadn't. It was my dad of all people who came to the rescue offering me a gig at his company. So, I finally made it to college as a security guard.

If more parents got a glimpse of what was going down on campus, they'd save the sixty grand a year and opt for the military, which was way safer. Me and my dad bummed heads at home, but we worked well together. I was still a disappointment though. Which didn't bother me except when I thought about it, which was pretty much every day, and more when I drank, which was pretty much every night. The shock of the 2024 election had worn off, and we wondered if there'd ever be another one.

One night I decided to check out the VFW. I was scared of turning into one of them boring drunks at the bar going on about their war. But I had to do something. I get my beer and I see some vet telling a story to a bunch of guys laughing their asses off. It's my old friend Bobby. Who lived across the street until his family moved away when we were kids.

He sees me and comes at me screaming he's gonna kill this candy ass creep motherfucker and when the other guys grab him he starts laughing and hugs me and says, Where you been, brother? Turns out he'd deployed the same time as me. We got together most days after that. He'd come in the house like he was a member of the family, which he kinda used to be. We had a little party for Terence to welcome him back, but it was really for my mom. Terence said, Mom, I've got a surprise.

He opened the door and Bobby came in. And you could see her light up. The two of them always had this bond. Me and Bobby had a regular thing of getting together Saturdays to call local vets to make sure everyone was okay. The weekends were the hardest, when we'd wonder why we were still alive and our friends weren't. I'd call the vets and just check in, but Bobby would get on the phone and rag on him and give'em shit and make'em feel like they had a friend.

I remember saying to Hadley, So many of us come back messed up, but Bobby's just like he was when he was six years old. She gave me this look and said I don't think he is.

When we were kids, my family shared a vacation cottage in Canada with Uncle Paul's family, and we'd go up for a few weeks in the summer. Back then Bobby was having a rough time at home, and we invited him to come with us on vacation. I remember showing him all the secret places and teaching him to sail and water ski and he told my mom it was the best time he'd ever had. We made big plans for next summer at the cottage, but that's when my dad sold us share to Uncle Paul and we never went back.

Now that my parents' marriage had blown up, we didn't go to the general's house for Sunday dinner anymore, so I'd catch up with Mickey on campus. I told him the deal with Isaac, how he was in a bad situation in Utah, and I'd promised Uncle Garrett I'd bring him back home. Mickey said with a school break coming up he'd drive to Utah, get Isaac on a plane, and then kick back with friends in Oregon. At the time I was surprised he jumped on this mission, but looking back I

It made perfect sense. One night I was hanging out with Bobby and Terrence playing pool and my mom told me to go to bed, which kinda pissed me off since I wasn't a child. But we were all being super nice to her, given the situation. Maybe an hour later, I woke up to hear this tapping on my window. My bedroom was on the first floor, right next to the driveway. I pulled back the curtains and Bobby was standing there in the moonlight. smiling, like he just had the most amazing idea. I was

half asleep, but I opened the window and he hoisted himself up and climbed into my room. Didn't say a word, just lay down on my bed. I was so out of it I laid down next to him and he whispered So what is it you wanted to tell me? We had to bite the pillow, we were laughing so hard. Louise, I really don't feel comfortable with this. Shut up and talk, Mom, please. I knew this was a mistake. This is nothing you should ever hear. Mom. Okay, I'm sorry. I'm going to close my eyes so I can't see you.

He started kissing me very gently, and there was something almost innocent about it, almost. It felt insanely good. Most of Terrence's friends ignored me, but Bobby talked to me in a non-bullshit way, like he was actually interested in what I had to say. Having someone pay attention to you when you're 16 is a pretty big deal. Actually, at any age. We just snuggled and kissed.

That was the start of the first adult relationship of my life. Although it couldn't have been that adult since it involved crawling in windows in the middle of the night. Even when he was small, you could always trust Bobby. Once after grocery shopping, we all got in the car and he said, Mr. Weeks, I have to go back in the store.

I asked him why, and he held up a pack of chewing gum he'd lifted. He couldn't let himself get away with it. I said, Do you want me to go in with you, Bobby? He said, No, this is something I have to do myself. He was maybe seven years old. We watched him walk back to the store, this little kid all alone trying to do the right thing. And I remember wondering what

If my kids would do that. Part of what made the nights with Bobby so exciting was the danger of getting caught. One night we heard footsteps stopping outside my bedroom door.

We held our breath, and then they went back down the hall. We started laughing, and then they came back, and the door started to open, and Bobby slid down under the covers. My mom was standing there. And I pretended to be asleep, and she said, Remember when you were little and you'd have a nightmare and I'd lie down next to you until you fell asleep? I miss that. She told me how much she loved me, and then she was gone. Then Bobby climbed out the window, and he was gone too.

My mom rallied. Day by day she was stronger. She'd be the one to beat it and not even make a big deal about it. There was never any room for self-pity in our house. Or any pity at all. Sounds like you'd kinda had it with the university, Uncle Paul. Were you still trying to get tenure, even though the students were driving you crazy? Uh, I wanted it in a big way. Things were changing so fast. I wanted some security. And I almost got it. I was doing my morning jumping jack on the porch.

And Cal, the department head, came bounding up the steps with an idea of how to get me tenure. He couldn't promise anything, but his plan was so devastatingly brilliant he was sure he could pull it off. He said I was the best professor in the department. I told him I wouldn't fight him on that, and however it worked out, he'd always be my friend.

I think that relieved him. We all needed each other more than ever back then. We shook hands and made plans to talk when he got back from vacation in a week. He had to work late that night doing assessments in the psych center to make One Friday night in the winter, I was invited to a party that was hugely important to me for a whole lot of reasons, too embarrassing to go into.

But Terrence was working with my dad, and Isaac was still in Utah, so if I went out then Mom would be alone. Terrance said I had to stay with her. All I could think about was how hard I had worked to build the social capital to get invited to the party, only to lose it babysitting mom who was doing fine. How could out of it Terence ever understand that? It was one of the worst fights we've ever had. He said, I'll know if you leave Ella, so don't. the first time I told my brother to go fuck off.

It felt so good, I wondered why I'd waited so long. I was so fired up about Cal's tenure plan. I worked out at the gym that night. Puffing and puffing on the elliptical. Got sushi and went back to my room, feeling virtuous for not drinking. When I heard it, I didn't know what it was, but I knew it was big. My mom must have heard my argument with Terrence, so she asked what I'd be doing if I'd gone out.

I was deep in this annoying teenage phase of guarding my secrets from my family, which you know all about, Louise. Jesus, Mom. Anyway It's pretty hard to think back on not talking to my dying mom. But that night I told her about this group of girls I used to be friends with when we were little, who'd iced me out ever since freshman year, and I never knew why.

Lately they'd been almost nice and invited me to this party, which would have been a major social breakthrough. She asked me if I liked them, which stopped me cold. I'd never even considered that. My mom said, Well, Ella, I don't think you're missing much tonight. The house was usually so chaotic, but that night it was just the two of us. And it was snowing harder and harder. And we made hot chocolate and sat by the fire. And if I could have just one minute back from that night.

I'd be happy for the rest of time.

What happened then night changed everything. This is the hardest goddamn thing to talk about, Louise. I'll do my best. I knew the terrible thing was going to happen, but I I didn't know when. I worked so hard finding out everything I could. But I didn't have quite enough information to make a move. The clock was ticking and I couldn't tell anyone. You act too soon and you blow it. Or you wait too long. Which is what I did. Worst night of my life. And I've had a lot of bad ones.

My dad finally told me what was happening. If there's anything good that came out of that night, it's that my dad and I shared the guilt. We couldn't really talk about it with anyone else. We didn't talk much about it with each other now that I think of it. David? I was downtown with a couple of friends, nerding out at an arcade. The boom. was so loud it shook the building. And we went running outside, and it looked like the sky was on fire. Mom got tired early, so she went to bed, and

I'm hearing from my friends about the unfolding drama at the party, and they're trying to convince me to sneak out for a sleepover. And I decide that's what I'm gonna do because when will I ever have this chance again? That's when I'm gonna do it. I heard it. I'm running down the street and everyone is totally freaked. And it's like I'm in my own disaster movie. I heard my mom calling from her bedroom, kind of moaning. A sound I had never heard before.

And somehow my idiotic decision to sneak out was connected to the boom, which was connected to the moaning. Everything was happening at once, and it was all bad.

I went into my mom's room and she said very softly, Ella, it's time to call the ambulance. She'd aged years in the hours since she went to bed. I called 911, but it took forever for the ambulance to get through the snow. Two EMS come into the house looking shaken. And I'm thinking, get it together, guys. Isn't this what you do? Bring people to the hospital?

I rode with mom in the ambulance and we're skidding on the icy roads and I'm holding her hand and it seems like they're taking the longest route. At that time in my life, I was not one to speak up, but I was so scared, I said, why aren't we taking Franklin? One of them said, a building blew up at the university. That's why I couldn't reach my dad and Terrence. I kept calling and calling while my mom is slipping away, and it's snowing so hard we can hardly see where we're going.

The only one I reached was David. When Ella called, I headed over to University Hospital. The streets were madness, sirens and smoke and cops everywhere, and people screaming. Nobody knew what had happened, but it felt as if there must have been massive loss of life. I got to the hospital and it's totally quiet. Where are the victims? I rushed into my Aunt Hadley's room, and there she was, hooked up to all kinds of tubes, and it was only my cousin Ella with her.

She always seemed so sophisticated in high school, at least compared to me, which is setting the bar pretty low, but she looked like a little kid, totally helpless. When she saw me, she came rushing over and hugged me, which she never did. It wasn't that we didn't like each other, we just traveled in different circles, and I was probably a social embarrassment and At that moment we were together and it was huge.

There was a young doctor hurrying in and out, and Ella asked him what they were doing for her mom, and the doctor said, Frankly, based on her medical history, the best thing we can do is let her go. Which might have been true, but it was a knife in the heart. There was this moment when Ella just stared at him. Then she reared back. And punched him in the chest hard and said, You have no fucking right to say that.

I probably should have done something, but I was too shocked. I mean Ella was the sweetest girl, and here she is, slugging a doctor and saying Fuck It was kind of great, actually. The doctor apologized while he was backing out of the room, and she's saying do your fucking job, doctor It felt like we'd been abandoned, and it was up to us to do whatever had to be done, which wasn't supposed to happen for years.

That's when I decided to be a doctor. I would save people, like my Aunt Hadley, and get adored by people like my cousin Ella. My whole life changed that night. Ella went over to the window to pull herself together, looked out, and said, Oh my God. I can't believe it. Isaac was getting out of a cab and walking through the snow to the hospital entrance. His hair was long and he was so thin and had this really unfortunate beard, but it was magical. He just Appeared.

When he came in the room, Mom's eyes opened, and she managed a smile. I always suspected that Isaac wasn't of this world, and that night proved it. Later on, my dad and Terrence showed up, so the whole family was together. We were talking to Mom, who was lying there, eyes closed, and Terrence said Can she hear us? For some reason we all turned to Isaac, who said yes. So we kept telling her how much we loved her and that it was okay to go.

At one point, David said I should call my parents. My dad said that's not necessary. The way he said it. That's when I knew something else was going on. But I didn't know what. I just knew I'd never seen my dad and brother look the way they looked that night.

My mom left us last night. He thanked me for getting him to come home and see her one last time. I said you can thank Mickey where is he anyway? He said Mickey had gotten him on the plane and then headed out to see friends in Oregon. Then he suggested we sing at his mom's memorial, which turned out to be the best thing we could have done. The people who bombed the psych center were careful there be no loss of life.

The violence was a response to the university working with the government on a secret program that would be used against anyone who opposed them. What the bombers didn't know was that my friend Cal was working late that night at the Psych Center so he could get his vacation in. Cal was a good man, in a tight spot, like many of us at the time. He was the only fatality. And I never found out what his plan was to get me tenure. There were four people who bombed the psych center.

We didn't have time to grieve over Hadley. We were exhausted and out of our minds. It wasn't just bringing the terrorists to justice. was saving my company's contract with the university. Ruth offered to plan the memorial, which was a huge help. There was a lot of tension between our families, but we always stepped up for each other. Not everything has to be about politics. Ella was taking it the hardest and it was good for her working with Ruth.

When Isaac and I sang at Aunt Hadley's memorial, Uncle Garrett started smiling. I hadn't seen him smile in months and months since Hadley's diagnosis. There was something about Isaac that was so joyful when he sang he couldn't resist. I remember watching Terrence watching his dad watch Isaac. There was Terrence, the ex-Marine, working with his dad and being the best son he could be, and somehow Garrett couldn't give it up for him.

We sang all these songs that Hadley loved and we finished with everyone joining us for We Shall Overcome. It wasn't the song their family would have chosen, but that was what Isaac and I were feeling after Bear's ears. We were killing it, and Isaac kept looking over at me, smiling, like, Where did this come from? We never sounded better, and I remember feeling guilty that I was so happy and excited about our future, While we were mourning Isaac's mom.

But that's what Aunt Hadley would have wanted, to give us a ray of hope in the middle of sadness, to keep going with our music. I wouldn't have done anything different, even if I'd known that would be the last time we'd play together. We were a wreck from saying goodbye to Hadley. When her memorial was over, I hugged Garrett and said, Just say the word if there's anything I can do for you, brother. He just looked at me. Tell me where Mickey is.

I told him Mickey had gone to Utah to get Isaac on a plane, and then headed to Oregon to see friends. And he said, when you hear from him, you need to tell me. Something I don't understand, Uncle Paul. You look at the media coverage in 2025, 2026, and it seems like things were pretty much on track at that time. Everything was kind of booming. That's how fascism works. You have to buy into the big lie and give the great leader the coverage he wants, or you go under in more ways than one.

What we read in the papers had nothing to do with the lives we were living. When Paul told me that Garrett was circling around Mickey, asking all these leading questions, it was all I could do to not confront him. Mickey was a radical and liked to stir people up, and Garrett couldn't wait to put him in his place. I remember thinking what a terrible reaction it was to Hadley's death for Garrett to become even more of a bully. They found three of the bombers.

There was only one left. I was pretty sure I knew who it was, but what I had still wasn't rock solid. It was cops in Minnesota who got lucky and caught the three. I decided it was on me to get the fourth. I needed to do it, to make up for how I dropped the ball, so I could live the rest of my life without torturing myself.

I felt guilty I was thinking more about catching Mickey than about losing the only woman I ever loved. On weekends after calling the other vets, Bobby and I would shoot hoops. He was driving me home after we kicked ass in a two-on-two on the town court. Bobby got quiet, which hardly ever happened, and I said, Hey, you okay? He apologized for not speaking at my mom's memorial.

I told the man it didn't matter. It was just whoever felt like talking. And he said, I knew I couldn't talk about her without crying. When me and Bobby were kids, him and his parents lived across the street and we did everything together. His dad, Jean, had been in the Merchant Marines retired, so he had lots of free time.

He rode a Harley and took us hiking, and there was a place way out in the woods where we camped a bunch of times. It was a huge deal when me and Bobby were allowed to camp there by ourselves. We didn't find out till morning that his dad was camped out nearby, just in case. Jean was the one dad in the neighborhood who made time for us. One morning when we were maybe m eight years old, Gene got on his Harley and off he went.

I remember talking to my mom about it, and she said, when a man leaves on a motorcycle, he doesn't come back. So Bobby was stuck with his mother, who was kinda nuts. My mom would send me across the street and say, See if Bobby wants to go swimming with us or come over for a cookout or go to the movies. I was a clueless little kid who didn't understand that my mom was making Bobby a member of our family.

But he knew, and he never forgot. After a few years, Bobby's mother couldn't afford the house and they moved away and we lost touch. But for those few years my mom made sure Bobby had a family. When he told me this, I just lost it. I mean that's how she was. Just do what's right and don't make a big fucking deal about it. I'd always been so wary of Sunday dinners at the general's, but now I found myself missing them. I even missed the general, who could be such a dictatorial blowhard.

He was living alone in that big drafty house with an ever changing team of caregivers. One afternoon I found myself driving up there, which I never would have done if I had thought about it. It felt odd to be there without the rest of the family, but I rang the bell, and Jerry, the latest caregiver, Took me to the library where the general was slumped by a dying fire reading Herodotus. He bounced right up and was so genuinely glad to see me.

And selfish for never visiting him before. I told him how much I missed the family parties at his house. He said he never thought there'd be such bad blood in the family. We talked to each other in such a real way as we never had before. I promised I'd come back to see him, and I did. The family was splitting apart just like the cows. But I made a point of visiting Ella and the general.

We'd find ourselves talking about the way things used to be, with football games, Easter egg hunts, Christmas Eve, Sunday dinners together. It had only been a few years, but it seemed like some innocent long ago time that was gone forever. After my mom died, things changed with Bobby. He would still tap on my window and get in bed with me. But the closer we got, the more I could see that his whole life of the party act was to keep people at a safe distance.

One night, I said something about my mom, and he started to tear up and tried to make a joke of it. And I said, Bobby, you can be who you are with me. When we kissed after that, it was different. I guess we were falling in love. Sometimes we'd just whisper in the dark for hours and then he'd climb back out the window. And other times, as soon as we lay down together, we'd start kissing and touching.

And undressing each other. And that winter, we had nights so magical. Nothing in my life has come close. Two naked bodies squished together on a single bed, not able to make a I don't for fear of getting found out. He'd say. Ella, if I ever hurt you, I'd never get over it. And I would tell him that this was the absolute best thing in my life, which it was. I started to see the struggle he was having. Part of it was about me.

He was so happy being with me, which paralyzed him with guilt And the other part was something else. Bobby was always talking shit about going to California and opening a surf shop. Kind of a stretch for a guy who'd never surfed and wasn't crazy about the water. It was just part of his rap. Like how when he made his fortune, the first thing he'd do is get a new best friend.

The Saturday he didn't come over to call the other vets, I made the calls myself, then left a message for Bobby. I was working the next few days and when I tried again and he wasn't there I started to wonder. When Bobby disappeared, the whole family slipped into panic mode. Terrence and my dad were trying to remember if Bobby had said anything to suggest where he went, but I was in my own scared place, but it was worse because I had this secret.

If I admitted what had been going on with Bobby, he'd be excommunicated from the family. But I was like them, trying to remember if there were any signs. Our last night together he had been almost giddy, like the first time with me. But then I thought of this moment in the dark when he whispered, Ella, you're like your mom. You see pain no one else sees, and you make it better.

He went on about how I should always know how much I meant to him. But then he was slipping my t-shirt off and I was unbuckling his belt, and that moment was gone to make way for the next one. How could I have told my family that? I kept thinking about Bobby's dream of going to California and that this is how he'd do it. No goodbye.

just disappear and then I'd get a call to get my ass out there because he's got a place on the beach and the girls are awesome and we're gonna start a surf shop together. He knew I was stuck. If I didn't get out, I'd get old in that town. I might even turn into one of them drunks at the VFW that scared me so much.

We talked to Bobby's mother. Ten minutes, and I was surprised he hadn't left sooner. She lived on another planet. Bobby was a miracle for turning out like he did. He'd been gone a few days. Long enough so you worry, but short enough so you try to convince yourself not to. One morning I saw there was a message from Bobby on my phone and I thought, California, here I come, baby. The message was just this creepy groaning sound, then nothing.

Me and my dad played it over and over, but we couldn't figure it out. I felt like I knew the sound but couldn't place it. He said At least we know he's alive. I couldn't think of anything but Bobby. I was tanking Tess. and so distracted, one of my teachers insisted I talk to the guidance counselor. who asked if everything was okay at home. Yes, mister Groom, everything's perfect. Except my mother just died, and my secret marine lover has disappeared. Oh, and I might be pregnant.

One night I woke up and heard strange sounds, so I went outside to check things out. The trees were groaning in the wind, and I was thinking, where have I heard that sound before? I stood there in the snow listening and then I knew. I went inside. bundled up and got a toboggan out of the garage and started hiking. It was a long way out in the woods to where me and Bobby had camped as kids. That's where I found him. hanging from a tree. I climbed up and cut him down.

Put him on the toboggan and then the two of us headed back home. There have been entire years of my life that slipped by, and I can't remember what I did. And then there's the winter when my mom died, and Bobby died, and I was pregnant, and the country was blowing up. I could openly grieve for my mom, but everything with Bobby was a secret, including how hard his death hit me. How did I deal with it? I started going out with Tyler Cole.

The only way I could do it was to pretend I was someone else. And the strange thing was how easy it was. I'm either a totally dishonest person or a brilliant actress. Or both. I played the part of carefree sophomore instead of a shattered pregnant kid who woke up every day terrified. I had a breakthrough in the case.

the pieces together about Mickey the day before Bobby's funeral. How do you say goodbye to your best friend when he goes out like Pat? When you've been with him every damn day and you never saw the signs. I told my dad I didn't need to go to a funeral to remember Bobby. He just said, I'll be in the car. Come out when you're ready.

In my dad's head, he was giving me a choice. Ruth and I went to Bobby's funeral together. Angelica stayed home. It was too dangerous for her to be out, especially with all the military type. It wasn't until we were outside that I saw Garrett. He stood right in front of us so we couldn't get past. I tried to lighten things up, saying, Hey, if people didn't keep dying, we'd never see each other, Garrett. Which was wrong on so many levels, as Ruth helpfully pointed out with a single look.

People were getting up and talking about Bobby and I'm sitting there thinking, what if I faced this crowd and said what I haven't been able to tell a single soul? I loved him with all my heart. He sneaked in my bedroom window on many nights, and we made love, and we shared everything, and I think I'm going to have his baby. Oh, and I'll never love anyone as much as I love him. Oh. It was so clear in my head that I was actually holding on to the pew, so I wouldn't suddenly stand up and say it.

Garrett just kept staring at us, and then he said in this soft voice, so we had to lean forward to hear him. I think you should know they've caught three of the bombers. The fourth one is Mickey. I said, that's not true. But my voice didn't even sound like me. Garrett said, I'm going to find him. Then he was gone. I think we already knew. We just couldn't face it. Garrett made us live in reality, which wasn't my favorite place back then.

Ruth gave me a ride back to the rooming house. In all the years of our courtship, marriage, and separation, it's the only time we were both. Usually tears are a tag team event for us. Year by year, living with the truth had gotten harder. Now it was intolerable. Our family had landed smack in the middle of a civil war. The one most in the middle was Ella. She and I had worked so well together planning Hadley's memorial, and she and David were close since they were together during Hadley's last.

Hours. But Ella was loyal to her own family. And politically, well, at that point you couldn't talk to any of them. We all stayed in our own camp. At first none of us believed Mickey could be involved in that kind of thing. Then I'd see footage of the DC march and the tanks rolling into the crowd and I'd think He's right. We're at war. And we need to fight back or everything we love will be gone. Angelica and I had to be careful.

She didn't have papers, and if they grabbed her, she'd get deported, so we picked our spots going outside. Apart from her legal status, we had to be on guard because same-sex relationships were under fire. Legal protections were gone. The Supreme Court, which everyone knew is just a hard right wing of the ruling party, made sure of that. It was safer in our university town than other parts of the country.

but there was a chill in the air if you were holding hands with your girlfriend. We were happy to stay home and marvel over Gabriel, the most perfect child who ever lived. I'd look at my own kids, Mickey dead or on the lamb, Kate at the And David Long. just trying to get by and I'd wonder what kind of parents Paul and I had been. Could we have done more to guide them to a good place? Or was it the times we were living in? I was going crazy, bouncing between my fake bubbly high school persona,

And the cold desperation I felt when I was alone. I finally went over to Aunt Ruth's house. She had told me, I can never replace your mom, but I'll always be there for you, Ella. I was just Just about to knock on the door when I heard laughter inside. And I thought, when was the last time I heard people really laughing? Ruth was so happy with Angelica I could feel it as soon as I went inside.

We had tea, and I told her about my situation, and she asked me what I wanted to do. I told her I didn't see how I could do right by a baby. Getting an abortion is a huge decision. And it was against the law, so you had to know somebody and have money, and you'd go to jail if they caught you. There was an organization called Life Sacred, which was building a database of doctors who performed abortions and pledged one member of each doctor's family if they continued.

An eye for an eye approach to an established medical procedure. The government had made contraceptives illegal, so there were many girls in my position, but I have never felt so alone. Ruth told me she was plugged into this underground network for taking in refugees like Angelica. And there were people who'd know where I could get an abortion.

So much of what we'd taken for granted was now against the law. As if the Taliban had ridden into our town and either you conformed to their sixth-century beliefs or got beheaded. What touched me was how people were organizing to take care of each other at great risk. Ruth turned out to be like my mom. You could bring her a problem that stopped you cold, and you'd leave feeling better. I didn't know what was going on with Ella at the time, but it must have been hell.

In his drooling senility, the great leader, a convicted rapist and proud abuser of women, had managed to turn abortion into a federal crime. Since contraception was also banned, it meant births were skyrocketing. I had to conclude that it was part of a grand plan by the ruling party to build a poorly educated population of American workers so immigration could be stopped completely.

Even the great leader understood that our booming economy was built by immigrant labor. Ella was acting even weirder than usual. In the past she'd have talked to my mom, but now she had no one. Typical night? I'm lying on my bed sobbing and there's a soft knock on my door. Terrence comes in and he says Are you okay?

And being a jerky little sister, having the world's longest teenage breakdown, and a little too stuck on my new favorite word, I said, What the fuck does it look like to you, Terrence? He turned to leave and I said I was sorry and blurted out that I was going to have an abortion. I could see him putting the pieces together Little Sister Sex Pregnant holy shit Then he said he'd take me to get it done.

I told him he didn't have to do that, but he said I needed protection. The attacks on doctors and their families were all over the news, and this life sacred group was leading the charge. weaponized mercy? And things get scary. The day we went to the clinic, I was glad he was there. But however you do it, it's the loneliest trip a girl's ever going to make.

I was totally opposed to abortion, but my sister needed help. And what kind of brother would throw his big shot opinions around at a time like that? We drive the whole way in silence until I say Terence? Amen. Please don't ever tell dad about this. Amen. or in the parking lot of the urgent care clinic where my brave doctor is waiting and there's one other car in the lot and the driver is checking us out.

Terence and I are thinking the same thing. That dude is up to no good. The guy finally gets out of his car, hand in his pocket, and he's coming right toward us. Parents whispers, Bring it, motherfucker, and gets a handgun out of the glove compartment. and opens the door. I say Terence no. But he's already out of the car, fearless, facing down the danger. He must have been one hell of a soldier.

They're staring at each other, and the guy finally says, It's my wife. Going full term could mean her life. His voice is shaking. Terence says, it's my sister, and she's just a kid. The guy says, Good luck, brother. And Terence says, you too.

Terrence gets back in the car and we sit there a minute and he says, Now we know who Tyler Cole really is. I just looked at him like, what are you talking about? He says, He's responsible for this and he leaves you in danger? I burst out laughing, and Terence is staring at me, wondering exactly how crazy his little sister is. I finally say, Tyler is not the father. He keeps looking at me and I force myself to say, It's Bobby. Bobby is the father. Terrence's face starts twitching.

Like he's trying not to cry. Then he's pounding the steering wheel so hard I'm scared. his best friend offed himself without telling Terence about this huge thing with me happening right under his nose. No wonder he felt betrayed. He finally calmed down and said softly, It's Bobby's baby. Like he was just trying out the words. The thing I remember saying is you still want to go through with this? If anyone else had given me a ride to the clinic I'd have done it.

And you wouldn't please don't go there, Mom. Terrence and I were both in love with Bobby, and this baby was what he left us. And in that moment we both felt so overwhelmed. We sat in that parking lot a long time. I finally said, let's pick up a pizza on the way home. We're driving home, and Terrence says when your baby is born, Dad might notice, and then you'll have to tell him. I whacked him on the arm and we both started laughing.

Years later I said to Ella, it's lucky I went with you that day. And she said That wasn't luck, Terrence. That was you doing the right thing. I can't imagine what my life would have been if you hadn't.

Louise, when you said you were going to interview all of us about the family. I promised myself I wouldn't tell the truth about your father. I spent years hiding it from myself, and I don't think I can tell you. You have to tell me. It just isn't easy this part of the story. Especially with you sitting there. I'm not here, Mom. It's just you talking. Now close your eyes and talk. Please. Back when Bobby and I were I almost said dating, but the fact is we never saw each other outside my house.

I was totally obsessed with the high school social scene and popularity. I was living in two different worlds. It would have been perfect if I could have brought Bobby into my high school world, but I couldn't. After I made cheerleader sophomore year, my friends started telling me I had a shot at being voted winter queen at the Snowflake Ball, the all-school dance in February. But I couldn't win if I didn't go, and I couldn't bring Bobby as my date.

As pathetic as it sounds, I was feeling sorry for myself. At the time, Tyler Cole and I were just friends. So I was surprised when he asked me to the dance. This was my chance at the crown. I said yes before he could even finish asking me. Then I had to tell Bobby. I couldn't hide how excited I was. Bobby said all the right things, how I should go and have the time of my life, but I could see he was hurt, or maybe scared that I'd leave him.

Because by then, what we shared went so deep for both of us. I told him I loved him. The first time I'd actually said that. And he smiled, a pretty sad smile. Like I was saying it just so he wouldn't feel bad when I went off on my glam date with all my friends and he was left alone. What happened was there were two gorgeous senior girls who hated each other, and they split the vote. Yeah.

I had a strong sophomore turnout, which was enough to win. I went up to get crowned, and the whole school was cheering, and I thought, if nothing good ever happens to me again, I'll still die happy. And of course I cried, which is required. It was the night I'd dreamed of. I never saw Bobby again. That was the night he disappeared. Next time on It Happened Here 2024. The Great Leaders government stamping out dissent, the weak I said, Am I the enemy? Everything stopped.

The general gave me this tight spot. You'll have to answer that question yourself. Everyone working. Our government is the enemy. I said, we don't need to do this. And the general said, I'm afraid we do, Ruth, we're at war. Served, know that in a war you're on one side or another, right, Terence? We all looked at the biggest. He was eating his mashed potatoes with his hands. Poor Terence was busted in this crazy private moment, and my dad, who was always the great peacemaker, wouldn't let it go.

He said, I'm not on your side, Dad. This country is in a death spiral. I won't be part of it. The general said you didn't surf Paul. You hit out at the university. My brother's Socialist left Rant played like gangster. Yeah. No place for it. With your precious idea. has led to. Look what your own son has done.

Directed by Joe Kakacci. The cast includes Molly Babos, Molly Cardin, Edie Falco, Santino Fontana, Luke Kirby, Tom Pacinka, Marianne Rendone, Tony Shaloub, and John Torturo. Our senior producer is Jess Hackle. Our composer, Jared Paul. Engineering and Mixing by Justin. Show art by Eleni Tsenaros. Our script supervisor is Graham Ferguson. Executive producers Joe Kakachi, Richard Drake.

Jack Doolin, Elliot Forrest, Evangeline Morphos, and John Whalen. This episode was recorded at Pullman Sound in New York City.