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The Henry Kissinger is Dead Episode

Dec 01, 202352 min
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Episode description

Mia, Garrison, and James celebrate the death of noted mass murderer Henry Kissinger and discuss the surprising country that isn't celebrating.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Transcript

Speaker 1

Also media, Welcome to Dick it happened here a podcast with the It is Henry Kissinger, and the happening here is that he's dead as a door nail. I'm your host via log with me on this joyous day after Kissinger's dead. Is Garrison Davis and James Stout. Welcome to the show.

Speaker 2

WHOA Hello, very excited.

Speaker 3

Had a had a fun night in the group chat last night, I did send over the hordy Henry Kissinger copy pasta without reading it to two of the group chat, and I feel like that was that was a good call. Fully at the exit.

Speaker 1

Within within thirty seconds of you sending that, I got the same I got the same message in another group chat and I was like, how it was.

Speaker 3

It was spreading around pretty quick. I wanted to jump on it soon before before other people were going to share it. So so yeah, that is that is, that is my duty. I mean, it's it's certainly upsetting. He lives till one hundred, but we will sell break his death nevertheless.

Speaker 2

Yes, it would have been nice if he died sooner.

Speaker 1

Yeah, yeah, it was nice. Well we don't we don't know how he died. He could he could have died horribly. We actually don't know.

Speaker 3

Oh yeah, he in his home in Connecticut, surrounded by his hopefully according to the Acial statement.

Speaker 2

Yeah, well, look, he lived a little longer and died a lot more pleasantly than a lot of the people his life he ended. Which is sad.

Speaker 3

It is It is sad, but it's also funny. He he died knowing he's probably one of the most hated men in the world, which is pretty funny.

Speaker 1

Parties of the fucking street like there was so there was. There was a giant pro Palestine protest in Chicago last night, and there's videos of them finding out live while they're in the streets that Kissing is dying and his giant cheer goes up. People having a great time. Yeah, I was texting my friends who were down at the border. Uh, the camera Kissinger is dead. Spread the word among the people of the nations that he destroyed.

Speaker 3

Pretty good, pretty good stuff. I mean, it's we we we all. We all had a fun time last night, as I'm sure many many of you listeners did. But slowly some organizations started to trickle out very embarrassing statements.

Speaker 1

Uh.

Speaker 3

The first one I saw was from the A d L who had a quite the quite quite the statement I'm gonna I want to find the I want to find it actually on on X the new hot social media app, because it's online on X because because the community note on it is just magnificent. Yeah, that was great, really really gives you a good look at the mind of Kissinger, and it's fun to laugh at the people who are like propping him up as some like great

Jewish statesmen. So yeah, Henry Kissinger was a towering intellect, diplomat and practitioner who, not without controversy, he helped shape American foreign policy with a lasting impact worldwide. A refugee from Nazi Germany and the first Jewish Secretary of State, he was unapologetic about his heritage and his embrace of the importance of American global power and democratic values. Which I like that they call him a practitioner, just a funny thing to say.

Speaker 2

Yeah, But there are a number of funny things in that post.

Speaker 3

Oh absolutely. Probably the funniest is that during a meeting of the Washington Special Actions Group, Kissinger said, quote, if it were not for the accident of my birth, I would be anti Semitic. Any people who have been persecuted for two thousand years, must be doing something wrong.

Speaker 1

Yeah, here's another one. That one's fun. It's another one. The emigration of Jews from the Soviet Union is not an objective of American foreign policy. And if they put Jews in gas chambers in the Soviet Union, it is not an American concern, maybe a humanitarian concern.

Speaker 2

And that was a real.

Speaker 3

Amazing stuff like it's it has. It has certainly been wild to watch any any shred of credibility that the ad L has had just absolutely go down the drain in the past two months by their own volition, just ruining decades of like of of research into anti Semitic extremism by just tarnishing every single piece of research they've done, by how they've how they've been behaving the past two months.

Speaker 1

Yeah, I mean they outraged us three or four years.

Speaker 2

They've really been a war like.

Speaker 1

They're like they're like fully going back to their like selling information to a partid South Africa days.

Speaker 2

Yeah, so.

Speaker 3

Praisingraming, praising Henry Kissinger is someone who admitted that he would be anti Semitic if he wasn't born Jewish. It was just like, what the fuck are you doing anyway that that was one of the first one of the first organizations to come out in in memoriam of mister Kissinger after after his his devastating passing last night.

Speaker 2

Sorry, I've I made a post about this ADL post and I'm just scoping the replies because there are a lot of normal people on on x dot com these days. Someone that there's a group which appears to exist to lobby for the ADL to lose its nonprofit status, and I'm just going to say that these are the people that a d L should be focusing their because this is this is the old school anti Semitism. That is a giant fucking problem and we all need to reject.

Like there is some hateful ship on x dot com and sadly it's in my replies.

Speaker 3

Yeah, there is there. There is plenty to go around, and the fact that they feel the need to defend mister Kissinger.

Speaker 2

This guy's running for governor of Missouri. So yeah, just as a podcast, I think we can safely say don't vote for Darryl mcclana and klan is in his name.

Speaker 3

This is our this is this is this is the capen. Here's first anti endorsement for the twenty twenty four election season. Yeah.

Speaker 2

Yeah, I'm just gonna say, don't don't vote for this guy.

Speaker 3

So so true. Well, god, I'm glad. I'm glad we could all bond over over over that as I bonded over the many, many funny, funny memes in the meme chats that I'm in rocketing on all scillators to. Twitter has been preparing for this night for years. We have been training. We've been training for so long. People have stayed on throughout Elon's catastrophe just yet, just for this night, and now are finally free they can yeah, finally be released into the pasture.

Speaker 2

Yeah, yeah, go live on.

Speaker 1

I'm surprised we didn't crash Twitter with yeah, were posting, hopefully his last words.

Speaker 2

Well, I wonder what they'll post about me.

Speaker 3

Yeah, I'm sure he was thinking about posting when he going out.

Speaker 2

That makes sense he would have been a post I don't.

Speaker 1

Think it was like, oh no, it burns.

Speaker 3

Oh god, Yes, Anthony Corday with brass knuckles at the gates of Hell.

Speaker 1

Yeah yeah, So okay, all right, so what are we doing for the rest of this episode? So okay, if if you want to do an episode that is the entire history of the stuff Kissinger did. Robert did a sixth part behind the Bastard episode. On it, you can spend like twelve hours of your life learning.

Speaker 3

About having having the worst time.

Speaker 2

Yeah, yeah, I always of a self help book. Is a self harm book? Audiobook has made for you?

Speaker 3

Yes, but with three funny people giving commentaries.

Speaker 2

Yes, it's very funny.

Speaker 1

Yeah. However, comma, so we have been talking about how I mean, people are like people are partying in the streets in Campodia like there. Kissinger's death has been a source of celebration for almost everyone on Earth. But that is not what this episode is about. This episode is about the one country on Earth that isn't celebrating. That

country is China. And on the country, not only is China not celebrating the death of Henry Kissinger, China is quite possibly the most popular American in the history of China to this day. Like right now, if you went and pulled like the favorability rating of like every famous American you can think of, the person with the highest

rating is almost certainly going to be Henry Kissinger. And you know, I mean, and this is this is and this is not just a sort of like a popular thing, although again he is enormously popular among ordinary Chinese people. This is a thing that goes from the state down Xi Jinping. He's actually, weirdly one of the last world leaders to talk to Kissinger. So Kissinger went to visit China in July, and him and Jijinping have this like

great heartfelt reunion. They have a time. Chijinping says, quote, the Chinese people never forget their old friends, and Sino US relations will always be linked with the name of Henry Kissinger. In the wake of Kissinger's death, the Chinese government said, from Reuter's quote, Kissinger made historic contributions to the normalization of China US relations, and Chinese people will forever remember him for his quote sincere devotion and important contributions,

Wang added. The Chinese Premier and the Foreign Minister also sent messages of condolences to Kissinger's family and to Secretary of State Anthony Blincoln. So he is getting like he is getting as good a reception in China as any American has ever gotten. And if you can understand how this came to be, how like every other country in the region fucking hates Kissinger like everyone else despises him.

And if you can understand why China, why he is like the most popular American in Chinese history, you can understand the entire arc of the twentieth century and how we ended up with the horror that we all live in today. But first, speaking of the horrors that we all live in today, is.

Speaker 3

A sad breaker, are you saying, yeah?

Speaker 2

Hopefully one of our yeah, hopefully yea. The Henry Kissinger collectible coins that they minted ten years ago and now been released to the market, and this will be the first of many adverts for them.

Speaker 3

They're only going to grow in value.

Speaker 2

Insulate yourself against inflation with these Hamory Kissinger coins, and.

Speaker 1

We are back. So this story, the story of how Kissinger became the most popular man in China or the most popular American in China, begins in Shanghai twenty seven. Oh, it is the year nineteen twenty seven. For over a decade, China has been Lossinger series wars is seven four four years old.

Speaker 2

Yeah, four years old, Child Kissinger.

Speaker 1

Child Kissinger is presumably unaware of the developments in China.

Speaker 2

Oh he oh, I don't think you say that he was.

Speaker 3

He was keeping tabs absolutely at four years old.

Speaker 2

Yeah, he was even back then. He was a quote foreign policy realist.

Speaker 3

A towering intellect of this stature doesn't doesn't start his twenties. He starts like in his toddler years.

Speaker 2

Choice of words. By the way, towering intellect. Just looking at him, the pictures of him in China where where he's dwarfed, and it's just very funny to look at this guys grabbing, towering. It's like he's gonna be like five foot nothing.

Speaker 3

His intellect is towering, not his not his, not his person.

Speaker 1

Short short king King would have been a great tweet if the ideada code of a short king, I'm ironically I would have stand that. Yes, you were saying so as as as as little tiny baby ass Kissinger is looking on. China's Communist Party is locked in a tenuous alliance with the Chinese Nationalist Party, which is the glooming Dong. No. Yeah, they saw so with the aid of the Soviets. And when I say the aid of the Soviets, I mean

the Soviets basically rebuilt the Nationalist Party from the ground up. Yeah, the Nationalists have turned into a juggernaut they have there, they have swept aside like every warlord army. They face their marching triophant across the country, and ahead of their advance, a massive uprising led by the communists finally drives the warlords out of Shanghai. The Chinese working class stands victorious. They and they alone stand triumphant over the greatest city

in China. It is the last time they will control this city for forty years. The new leader of the Nationalist Party is shan Kai shak Our proto fastist drug lord who the Soviets for some inexplicable reason thought was going to work for them and was going to like build a socialist state at China. Deeply unclear why they thought this. I don't know. Don't have Stalin running your foreign policy.

Speaker 2

I don't have started running shit.

Speaker 1

Like a yeah, yeah Christmas, Yeah, so's he's no kissing jerk, Like what can we say?

Speaker 2

Yeah?

Speaker 1

Also dead, though thankfully killed similar numbers of communists.

Speaker 3

We are.

Speaker 1

We are one sentence away from that. So, under the direction of Moscow, the communists in China convinced the Chinese working class to open the gates of the city to allow the nationalist army. Inside the nationalist army immediately begins slaughtering the Chinese working class. By by the end of the white terror that this is going to unleash, the nationalists will have killed one million people, most of them

Chinese workers and peasants. Basically like the entire you know, like like basically the entire urban Chinese left dies in this like like the in this slaughter, and with them dies basically the entire internationalist wing of the Chinese Communist Party.

Because the internationalist wing, the wing that had you know, very close connections to Moscow, were all like in Shanghai, and they were all but they were most importantly not that they were all literally in Shanghai, but they were all part of the urban Communist Party and they get just completely wiped out. And this is the part of the Shanghai o Rising that for our purposes is important because it's the first moment where the rift between the

Soviets and the Chinese Communist Party begins to form. Now, in the wake of the Shanghai massacre, Stalin sends the CCP instructions that are just nonsense, like he's telling them to stay aligned with the Nationalist Party, but to oppose Shang Kai Sheck. Like literally there's descriptions of the meeting when like this this telegram comes in, the CCP leaders

are like sitting around this thing is radio. They're sitting around this radio and they get the they like they get the instructions and they're just like these people are just burying their hands in their face because like this is nothing, it is nonsense, and you know, and this is sort of this is that's like the last gasp of the old Communist Party leadership. Those people are just gone, and in their place rises Mao. Now Mao is not

from the urban wing of the party. He is from like he's Mao is a peasant organizer, right, He's from the whirl wing, and his wing of the party tends to be more nationalists and less sort of like subservient to Moscow than the urban wing of the party. And with Stalin basically getting the entire urban Communist Party and like every other urban leftist in the country killed, you know, the people that are left are Mao and the sort of peasant organizations who have a distrust of the Soviets

that they're going to maintain for basically their entire lives. Now, obviously relations between the CCP and Stalin improve as like World War two happens, but there's a basically the moment the war ends, there's a series of incidents that sort of strained relations. One is that this is less an incident. But Stalin seems to not have thought that the CCP was gonna win the war, like he seems to have

thought that the nationalists are going to beat them. And one of the things that he does is basically de industrializes Japan's giant industrial belt and occupied Ventchuria. This is a completely intact industrial belt. It is one of the largest like intact industrial belts in the world, and Stalin, like in classic Soviet fashion, takes the factories, takes them apart, puts them on trains, and ships them across the sorry to rebuild the Soviet economy.

Speaker 2

YEP. One of the first of many such incidents.

Speaker 1

Yeah, and this is a catastrophe for the CCP because even after the CCP wins the war, because they've now you know, so it's like Shanghai is in ruins, Beijing, like most of China is just in ruins because of I mean, like what what year they on if effectively

continuous fighting and the after the war. China's industrial base in this is nineteen forty nine, right, their industrial base is smaller than Russia's in nineteen seventeen, which is just nuts, it is and this is small, yeah, and this is the conditions that the everything, the entire course of twenty century Chinese history are defined by these conditions, right, and these specific conditions are this is basically a production bottleneck, right,

And I've talked about this on the show before. This is one of the sort of most important things in twentieth century Chinese political economy is that, you know, the CCP is trying to simultaneously expand its agricultural production to feed people and also expand its industrial capacity. It's mostly

trying to expand it to its industrial capacity. The problem is they can't expand their industrial capacity without expanding their agricultural capacity, and they can't expand their agricultural capacity without expanding their industrial capacity. And their attempt just blow through this by like mass use of human labor is the

great lead board. It's a complete catastrophe. Right, This is just gonna fuck Like whatever like intentions like the Chinese Revolution had, this is just going to fuck them because the combination of this and their ideology is just going to doom the entire project. And you know this and so the other thing about this period, the Soviets are really really patronizing, like they talk about like constantly and like diplomatic things, like they talk about the Soviet like

the Chinese is like their younger brothers. There's like this weird like thing going on. This isn't enough to substantially threaten their alliance, but the relationship between the USSR and China is never as it's never quite as firm as people think it is. Now the thing that really like kickstarts the break between the USSR and China is Khrushchev's

secret speech denouncing Stalin. So this gets like leaked. Krushchev makes the speech for he was like, wow, Stalin did some fucked up stuff they called the personality was bad actually, and this pisses off an enormous number of peoples. Mau Forever like problems malhas with Stalin. He takes a very hard line on this where he's like, no, I'm like this. The Soviets are now revisionists. They have abandoned the path of Marcus Leninism. I am now the only anti revisionist

in the world. And you know, and this whole thing like results in these worstening relations between China and the Soviet Union, with the CCP basically calling the Soviets like weak neck bureaucratic social imperialists and the Soviets looking at like the great leap forward and being like, what are these maniacs doing? And this tension escalates to the sixties is both sides start massing troops on the Chinese Soviet border.

Now meanwhile, so so okay, the sixties goes on and control of the Soviet Union has fallen to Leoned Breshnev, who is an absolute maniac, deeply weird, deeply not very good guy, and he, in response to the Council Communist uprising in Prague nineteen sixty eight, Breshnev rolls tanks in kills everyone and then declares the Breshnev Doctrine, in which Breshnev claims the right to overthrow any socialist government who the Soviets decided we're trying to become capitalists, which I mean,

this is the Soviet's right like that that what that actually means is that they don't align with USSR. So Breshnev means this to be about Eastern Europe, right, Mao looks at this and goes, oh shit, Breshnev is going to try to overthrow me. And this does not go well. So and you know, I know that thing he's looking at it, he's looking at like the Soviet troops massing on the border, and he's like, oh shit. And this

is where things get absolutely wild. In nineteen sixty nine, there are a giant series of border skirmishes between this between Soviet and Chinese troops. People are killing each other across this enormous This is like continent side border. People are like like like companies of Chinese and Soviet troops are like firing artillery at each other. Everyone is completely

losing their minds. And this is actually like one of the reasons why like every once in a while you'll get these things from the Himalayas and China's border with India, where everyone's like hitting each other with sticks. And the reason you're hitting each other with sticks is that like the Chinese were like, wait, hold on, it's actually a bad idea to have guys with guns on the border of a nuclear power.

Speaker 2

Yeah, yeah, they have some amazing, amazing brawls.

Speaker 1

Yeah, but you know, but and the funny thing like that that's the reasonable version of this. In sixty nine, they're having the unreasonable version of this, where the Soviets are looking at the situation and they're going, oh shit, we can't win a war with China because their calculation is that they will eventually be overwhelmed by a combination of human wave attacks and the fact that like an enormous portion of the China's the Chinese population has been

trained in guerrilla warfare. And there's second problem is that the Chinese population is to disperse for them to all be killed by the Soviet nuclear weapons. And the CCP makes the same assessment, and it's like, Okay, if we fight this war, like the human wave attacks are just going to eventually are going to crush them. We're going to use force numbers that can't kill us all with nukes.

So the Soviets plan for this is they are like drawing up plans to line the border with China with nuclear land mines to stop the chese.

Speaker 2

It's nuts.

Speaker 1

Everyone is losing their.

Speaker 2

Minds normal times.

Speaker 1

Yeah, like I've seen rumors this is the thing. I don't have actually good sources on. I've seen a lot of rumors that both the both the Soviets and China like reached out to the US try to get them

the nuke. The other side, it's everyone is everyone is completely losing their minds, and you know, so at this point, like both sides kind of back down because both of them realized that, like, fighting this war is the stupidest thing that anything could possibly do, because there's there's like there is there was a little tiny shred of sanity left in both sides. That's like, do we like actually

what to have a nuclear war? And they're like no, okay, But this marks the permanent solidification of what's called the Sino Soviet split. And do you know what else is it is? It is a Sino Soviet split. It's the split between the part of the episode that's ads and the part of the episode that's episode.

Speaker 3

That is a very important split that does relate to the worker councils of the Soviet state, because if the Soviets got their wish for world domination, we wouldn't be pivoting to an added break. Instead, this would be uh, purely workers sponsor.

Speaker 1

I don't know.

Speaker 2

Here's the app.

Speaker 3

All right, I for one, am very excited to get those Coininger limited edition NFT collectibles. I think it's a real solid investment. So I know it sounds a little far fetched, but hey, in ten years you can sell it to some guy from the CCP and you might make a lot of money. So yeah, food for thought or the ad. That's right, that's right. You can sell it to Pit Cabbage. He could buy that for like

ten grand. Know all, if you spend one thousand dollars and in ten years you could be getting ten grand from Pit Cabbage, And that sounds like that sounds like a great deal.

Speaker 2

That's a that's a ten percent discount as well with the discount code. Garrison Davis Please sorry, he's back in a scripted podcast.

Speaker 1

So the back in nineteen sixty nine, basically from from yeah yeah, So basically from this point on, the USSR and People's Republic of China are enemies. This is what's called the Sino Soviet split. And Mao begins casting around for allies, and into this breach steps a man, a cursed through history, who's who's towering footfalls echo through the halls of power. I am talking, of course about Charles de gall friends.

Speaker 2

Yeah, most Frenchman two exists.

Speaker 1

Yeah. So Degall has been devising a strategy to pull China away from the USSR and towards the West. And this is the origin of what's called triangle diplomacy. Now, Kissinger steals this idea and goes and does it. But this was not Kissinger's idea. This was a This was a plan that was already kind of in motion that he stole from the Gall.

Speaker 3

Good artists copy, great artists steel. If Kissinger was anything, it was an artist, a great artist.

Speaker 1

What the Tony Blair Foundation said, It's not as Joe, God fucking Joe, because everything's too fucked.

Speaker 3

I'm quoting the Tony Blair Foundation.

Speaker 2

That was it.

Speaker 1

There was, there was, there was there was some uh oh god, I can't remember his name. So so someone in the seventies declared that satire the day, the day that Henry Kissinger won the Nobel Peace Prize the day satire died. And he was right, And this is why satire doesn't work anymork.

Speaker 2

Yeah, Tony Blair is now pissing on its grave.

Speaker 1

Yeah so all right, but the you know, Okay. So, so this triangle diplomacy thing, Kissinger basically takes it over. And the key element of this plan is is to use China as a bulwark against the Soviets both in East and Southeast Asia and in places like Central Africa. But in order to do this they have to actually like establish contact with China, a thing they haven't had in like thirty years. Wow, he's twenty ah whatever, Hey complicated. I'm not going to go through the entire diplomatic history

of China. But you know, if and this is this is the origin of one of Kissinger's most famous crimes, which is Operation search Light, which is Pakistan's genocide and Bangladesh. They kill about three million people. If you want to really detailed account of this, go listen to the Behind

the Baskets episodes. The short version of this is that Pakistan has been a Chinese ally for a while for a lot of reasons, one of which is China's antagonism with India, which peaked in nineteen sixty two when China just straight up invaded and He's beeded border region, conquered it and then like handed Nehru his ass in the process of what became known as a Sino Indian war.

And this is an incredible betrayal. By the way, like Nehru, who was the Prime Minister of India, Nehru had turned down a permanent seat on the UN Security Council because because he was being given the seat as a way to make sure China didn't get it, and he turned it.

He turned down that seat to get China onto the Security Council like out of out of like not I'm out of geopolitical like this was basically a pure like ideological I'm doing this because it's the right thing to do thing, and Mao returns him by fucking invading India. So because of this and because of like you know, India Pakistan don't like each other. This is this is known. The Pakistani government is very close with China. Pakistani troops

are trained by the Chinese army. They are armed with Chinese weapons and with Kissinger's blessings, so he could use the Pakistani government as an intermediary to negotiate with China. The Pakistani government seeds to kill three million Bangladeshis. It is yeah, this is it is among the worst crimes the twentieth century. It is a crime that it is broadly forgotten. China's complicity in it is forgotten. The American's complicity in it is barely remembered, basically only when people

talk about Kissinger. But this was one of the worst things that happened in like one of the worst centuries in human history. But you know, for Kissinger, this is an enormous success, right He gets everything that he fucking wants out of it, doesn't give a shit about bankwadeesh She's then. You know, this is a tradition that has like echoed through the like the eons of the oliberals ever since the US successfully opens diplomatic channels with China.

And soon Kissinger and Nixon are going to meet Mao in China, and I'm going to read from Mao talking to Kissinger, so you can understand who these people are. The tree between on two countries at present is very pitiful, is gradually increasing. You know, China is a poor country. We don't have very much. What we have in excess is women, Kissinger. There are no quotas or terrible for those, Chairman Mao. So if you want so, if you want them, we can give you a few of those some tens

of thousands. Prime Minister cho of course, on a voluntary basis. Chairman, Mao, let them go to your place. They will create disasters. That way you can lessen our burdens. Laughter. Sometime later, Mao, do you want our Chinese women? We can give you ten million laughter, says the Chairman is improving his offer bow. By doing this, we can let them flood your country with disaster and therefore impair your interest in our country. We have too many women, and they have a way

of doing things. They give birth the children, and our children are too many.

Speaker 3

I mean, this is like a deeply CCP moment, like.

Speaker 1

Yeah, this like this is one of these things. Was like there are people in the United States to this day who call themselves Maoists and like and think that this guy was like on the fucking left, and it's like, like, how do you fucking read that? Like him just him, just doing this fucking banter with the butcher of Bangladesh and be like no, no, no, this is the guy who figured out to keep the key to achieving like socialism, right, is the guy you figured o how to end the

class system and end imperialism? Is this fucking guy polling it up with fucking Henry fucking Kissinger like it's terrible, Like.

Speaker 3

I just.

Speaker 2

Yeah, it's I mean, the king to being a mauist is not reading this though true.

Speaker 1

I've seen MAOIs on Twitter try to defend this with their like well, it was only like a temporary thing because the Soviets were threatening the new China and like, you know, and I'm one of the things that one of the real problems they have is that so in Angola, there's a civil war in Angola. There is a faction that are the good guys, and then there's a faction that's being backed by apartheise South Africa, and China is backing the apartheid South Africa fashion.

Speaker 3

Yeah, so you know, and this is the thing they have to justify and they can't.

Speaker 1

And this actually, and you know, one of this actually has impacts in the US because like American maoists are confronted with this and are like what the fuck, like what is this ship? And there are some of them who just like ignore it in a quadruple down, there are some of it who become disillusioned.

Speaker 2

You could even pick a different tanky like like Cuba heavily supported the MPLA and I go, for instance, like.

Speaker 1

Yeah, just like yeah, moved to like Castro or something.

Speaker 3

I don't know. Trotsky is right there, he's right there.

Speaker 2

With an ice pick in his head.

Speaker 1

So true.

Speaker 3

Should have happened to Kissinger.

Speaker 1

We got.

Speaker 2

A fucking incredible alternate history.

Speaker 1

Lives and Kissinger dies, lives to one hundred.

Speaker 3

The world is so much it's the world's are like a great place, but it is a much better place in that alternate history.

Speaker 1

Can you imagine if Trotsky had held on long enough for social media to exist? You know, oh my god, poster him and the one the person I've been most sad right now that never gone on there was God, he would have been killed it. Yeah.

Speaker 2

Yeah, there's a few people you just think would have been magnificent.

Speaker 1

Doll has a famous Kissinger moment where he's he's he's watching he runs into a Kissinger like in the Sistine Chapel, like looking at the part that's like looking at the hell part of it. Vidald goes Kissinger is apartment hunting. Very funny y.

Speaker 2

Yeah, yeah, yeah, that is braid.

Speaker 1

So many of these. There's another famous one where the the absolutely dog ship American author Norman Baylor punches him and he's like falls over because he's got punched. While he's on the ground, Vidal goes words fail Norman Baylor again. Yeah yeah, really incredible guy, real time posting it. Yeah, tragic, tragic,

it never made it. Lots of tragedies unfolding. One of them is that you know this whole thing of like like Kissinger bantering with Maw like this, it works like the US and China established empthomatic relations and this is a this is a seismic shift in sort of Chinese popular culture and media and consciousness because from the Korean War until like the seventies, right, the way people think about America and the way they're portrayed in Chinese media

is like as the great imperialist enemy. Right, Like the last time there was contact between the US and China, it is a bunch of Chinese troops doing bayonet charges, like wearing sandals in the fucking snow, doing bayonet chargers through their own artillery broads to kill American troops like that. That is like like the amount of hatred like there is unbelievable, and you know it's funny because like the US like really forgot that war, but like China did not, right,

and suddenly like America is China's friend. And the human face of this absolutely Parkle shift in basically the entire ideological system of Chinese communism. The face of this shift in in the just the image of what America is, which is like it doesn't it's not quite mapping on, but it's like like America, like it's it's kind of like how Baptists think about the devil, right like that that that is the role that America has in Chinese like popular sort of culture, like up until this point,

and then suddenly it's completely pivoted on its head. And the face of this shift is Kissinger. And you know, and this, uh, this is ping pong Eurasia is what you're doing right now. This happened due to this all happened due to table tennis. And I won't hear any other way. Oh god, I was I specifically did it include that the table tennis diplomacy at this because I was like, I hate the ship.

Speaker 2

But yeah, when liberals really get on that ship, they talk about ping. I think Joseph Rye was a big ping pong diplomacy.

Speaker 1

Yeah, but it's like you know, but I I think, like being on diplomacy is an example of like how circumscribed the contact between the U to the US and China is. Right, Like again, like we're talking about like like ping pong team is playing each other. This is like the big diplomatic and cultural exchanges going on between China and the US. There's nothing. And this is something that you have to sort of understand if you want

to understand this pivot, is how isolated China was. Right Like the US through this entire period is pretending that the nationalists in Taiwan or the legitimate government of all of China, they have blocked off effectively all trade with China. They've blocked off basically all trade from the US. They've blocked off a huge amount of international trade and and you know, and this, this, this is something that really

really cripples the Chinese economy. Like you know, you can't quite blame it for like the famines because like I mean, for example, like the CCP was exporting grain to the USSR while greatly before what was happening, right like, but I mean it didn't fucking help that. And one of the other big consequence of this is that it is almost impossible for Chinese people to go to China like you, you basically can't do it. And this is an enormous deal because there are tens of millions of Chinese people

across the world who can't go back to China. These people can't see their families, they can't see their friends, they can't go to the graves of their ancestors, they can't they can't go home. And this happened with my family, Like my grandpa didn't see his brothers and sisters for forty years after the war. Forty years just did not

see his family. And you know, and it's only when Kissinger, and this is the way that it's seen in China, it's only when Kissinger re establishes relationship, which Kissinger goes out there and advocates, And the way they see it is he's advocating for China in the US, which is kind of true. But the way they see this is only when Kissinger re establishes diplomatic relations that's when it becomes possible for you to see your family again. And you know, like I cannot emphasize enough how big of

a deal this is in China. In the diaspora, Like if you are in the diaspora, you can't get fucking messages in you Like a lot of people don't know whether their family is still alive because the last time they saw them was the war or and when I say though war, like that could be World War two, that could be the Revolution, that could be people living

before that. And you know, this is a huge deal in the diaspora too, to the point where like a lot of the people who had been like in the in the Asian American movements in sixty eight, like people who had been like Yellow Peril, yellow power, people who are like ally with black panthers, Like these people are trying to get jobs in the Nixon State departments because they want to be there to like help reopen diplomatic

relations with China. It is it is like, this is like it is one of the sort of apocaum moments of the second half of the twentieth century. Is this this these diplomatic relations opening up again. And in the Chinese media, they don't really want Nixon to be the face of it because now they're.

Speaker 2

This is not great.

Speaker 1

But so they they put they put Kissinger as like the human face of all of this, and you know, and and there's there's and there's a lot of benefits in China from this. They're getting these massive technological transfers from the US, and this is one of the things that it's in I think it's a very underrated factor, but this is one of the factors that makes their

their technology. Like sorry, let me say that again. This is one of the factors that makes it's one of the incredibly underrated factors that makes their industrialization program work. And there's a lot of places where people try similar industrialization programs to what China is going to pull off, like Venezuela, for example, tries this and Venezuela's program completely fails because they don't have access to the technology that the US got from basically sucking up or that China

got from sucking up to the US. And and Kissinger is directly responsible for a lot of like a lot of these technology transfers. And for this, Kissinger is labeled as as like as a friend of the Chinese people like this. This is literally the way that it's talked about in the Chinese media, and even sort of beyond just him being labeled like a friend of the Chinese people like he is, like okay, So there's like one or two other Americans who you can sort of like

publicly express admiration for. Who are people who like effectively defected the China or just move to China and like we're there for the revolution. But those aren't like major figures, right, Like they're like communist journalists or stuff like that, or like anthropologists, like they're not. This is the first like actual public American figure that you were allowed and you are encouraged to be like yay, this guy fucking rules.

And in a very short amount of time, Kissinger becomes enormously popular as the man who you know, he's the guy who restored Chinese American relations. He's the guy who allowed all these people to see their families and ended the saction to terror regime. I mean he'sn't actually end them, but he's helping people work around them, and the sanctions eventually sort of come down. But you know, all of

us comes with the price. And this brings us to another Kissinger crime, which is a Kissinger in the coup against Chile's democratically elected president Salvaduryende. So this coup is fully green lit by the US, like Kissinger is involved with it. Pinochet is going to murder forty thousand Chilans. We've talked about this on the show a few times before, but what we haven't really talked about much is that after this, after the coup, Chile is like completely diplomatically isolated.

No one wants anything to do with them because this just met like maybe like absolute maniac massive murderer has just deposed like a sovereign government, like even like the even the UK like won't like refuses to like talk to them, right like like and when when like the Brits won't talk to you because you've done too many crimes. Yeah, yeah, you've really fucked it there, like the guys who who's

prime minister's son made a living doing coups. Yeah, but there is one country other than the US that will do that, will that will do that, will make deals with Pinochet, and that country is China. And China funny funnels millions of dollars like to some literally to Pinochet directly and to the Chilean government. And this is a time where China is not rich, and this is millions

of dollars like in in like nineteen seventies money. It's it's a lot of money, and and China is absolutely broke, and they're fucking sending it to and they're sending it to fucking Pinochet and like and like to get a sense of how weird this stuff is in China, right, Like a lot of people in China think that Pinochet is a socialist because he's being portrayed positively in the

Chinese media, so they assume that he's a socialist. Like, this is the kind of shit that's like just the absolute brain worms that are happening in China at this point because they're their connection to the outside world is really really tenuous, and the Chinese media is suddenly gassing up all of these just like horrific right wing dictators. Now as as Kissinger Star sends in China, the CCP

begins pulling its own Kissingers. So this is this is a a kind of a story we only learned about pretty recently, I think, in like the last two years. Benjaping was the first like Chinese communist leader to visit the US, and so he got he's in Washington, DC, and he takes time out of his schedule to have a secret meeting with the CIA where he goes to the CIA office to set up like list to set up CIA listening posts in China to spy on the USSR.

And one of the products of this, you know, so that's that's the sort of low level stuff that Chine's gett involved with. The high level stuff is in nineteen seventy nine, China invades Vietnam. They killed tens of thousands of people, They devastate both the Chinese and music economy. And this is one of the things that you know, this is a decisive thing in the Cold War, right,

China has like donnic They've invaded fucking They've invaded Vietnam. Yeah, and you know, and one of the one of the sort of modern iterations of this right has been you know, there's there's a long period of sort of like China's alignment with the US, and one of the other things that happens that China like becomes increasingly tied to Israel.

And this is one of the things that that's like true of China to this day is like there are a bunch of surveillance cameras in the West Bank that are that are that the Israelis used to surveil Palestinians that are built in China, right, the same the same cameras that are being used in shing Juan. A lot of like Chinese uh what's it called, Chinese police sometimes

special forces units like trained with Israeli like trainers. There's a lot of like they do like count like quote unquote counter terrorism exchanges and and the other big aspect of this is that a huge part of the Israeli tech industry and a huge part of UH like they're sort of like defense complex is fueled directly by Chinese resources and by Chinese raw materials, and also by things

like transistors that they're importing from China. And this is this is the product of the sort of long arc of Kissinger's work in China, and Kissinger's work sort of peeling off Egypt UH from the Palestinian like Soviet camp And this ultimately is the price of opening relations with the US. It's not a price that's paid by the

Chinese ruling class. Instead, what happens is that every dissident in China, every fucking child in CAMPODI, every teenager and he's Teamwar, and every veteran in Vietnam Mao sells them the fuck out, Dingha Ping sells them out, Kuchinito sells them out, Xijinping sells them out. They take American money, they take American technology, They shake hands with Kissinger, and they let Bangladesh burn. And for this, Kissinger would remain

a steadfast ally the Chinese capitalist classes entire life. When the CCP butchered the last gas of the Chinese working class at Tienemen, Kissinger stood by the CCP and basically is one of the few Americans straight out doing pr for them. He does it again when China's tried to enter the World Trade Organization. He like, this is the last thing he was doing before he fucking died was going It was going to China and allying himself for the Chinese ruling class. And you know, he meets Xi

Jinping and is greeted as an old friend. And this is how you get to the thing that's been happening today, which is like all of these Chinese, like the Chinese Foreign Ministry and a bunch of timehmaking Chinese government officials like releasing these statements about how doctor Kissinger is a good friend of the Chinese people, and this ultimately is what Kissinger represents the prospect of the alliance between the American and Chinese capitalist class built on the blood of

the working class of five confidents. It is a world in which there is peace and prosperity for the bourgeoisie, where there was starvation and death for everyone else. And this still to this day, is the regime that rules the US, it is the regime that rules China. And they are being united for one final time in their life of one Henry Kissinger. And yeah, that's basically all

I've got. I guess the last thing I can say is one of the things that I think I hope people will understand about this is that the way that the American left thinks about China, like the that it the way that it's politics function, are completely illegible in China,

like there are no like in the US. It is very common to have someone who is like pro Palestine, who is like socialist, who is like pro LGBTQ like rights, who like you know, who considers hissel as nanty imperialists, who is also pro CCP and also fucking hates Kissinger. And this is not a position that exists in China. There is nobody like this, Nobody, fucking like, no one at all believes this because it's just it's not a

coherent political position. Is it is an American projection of politics on the China because again, meanwhile, like the actual thing that's happened in China is because of the way the media has covered Kissinger. The thing they covered is the normalization of US China relations and not all of the fucking genocides that he did. And so they have the same fucking whitewashed view of Kissinger that like right wing Americans do and that the American ruling class does.

Speaker 3

And this is truly, truly has been the century of Kissinger from twenty three to twenty three.

Speaker 1

But but fuck that, the center of Kissinger is over. Now is the century of the social revolution. We're fucking going for his ass. We're gonna tear apart everything he ever built. That motherfucker's gonna watch from hell as we destroy everything he ever created his entire life. Yeah, we got time.

Speaker 2

Let's that's why we're we're taking a week off to go to Chile and begin the social revolution that Kissinger destroyed. Again as a podcast, we we.

Speaker 3

We do now have to choose the new most evil person alive. There's there's been quite a there has been quite a few in the running. We have we have Chinese up there, obviously, we have uh W Bush, we have we have net and Yahoo.

Speaker 1

We have.

Speaker 2

Making a strong case right now. Yeah, we have did him off. Maybe he wanted to take the seat, take the throne.

Speaker 3

Yeahs made a decently strong case. Sure, yeah, sure there is there is, There is a decent list running. I think only time will tell for who will truly have a lasting impact of similar evil. But yes, that there is now a new new open position for most evil person alive. So many people are throwing their hat into the ring. We will see how this contest plays out.

Speaker 1

Yeah, and you will. You will hear it when when that fucking person dies. You will hear it on this show too, And we will enjoy it. Yeah, it's panik it out here. Go have a good time. Enjoy, Enjoy for this enjoy. By the time you're hearing this, the second ever sunrise in a hundred years that does not have Henry Kissinger under it.

Speaker 2

Yeah, somewhere today, somewhere in the world, a baby has been born in a post Kissinger world, and we can we can.

Speaker 3

All the most evil baby has been born and we have.

Speaker 1

To yeah yeah somewhere thanks to the cyclo Sam Sarah Henry Kissinger is attack.

Speaker 3

That's right.

Speaker 2

So if you're squeezing out a baby this month, just be careful. It's all I'm saying.

Speaker 3

It Could Happen here as a production of cool Zone Media.

Speaker 1

For more podcasts from cool Zone Media, visit our website Coolzonemedia dot com, or check us out on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to podcasts. You can find sources for It Could Happen Here, updated monthly at coolzonmedia dot com slash sources.

Speaker 2

Thanks for listening.

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