Up-leveling your Duas

Power of Dora is very well understood in the Muslim community in general and very well taught , but often it stays underutilized . This happens because we limit what we believe with our thinking and we limit ourselves from what we can get from Allah SWT . So the limitations are from our thinking , not because Allah SWT has any limitations . He is beyond limitations .

My goal for this podcast is for you to be able to make Dua with so much clarity , energy and conviction that you blow your own mind , and today's podcast is going to be about finding that certainty . When I mean energy , conviction and clarity , I mean your thoughts are in line with your feelings .

You are believing the language with your mind and with the feelings in your body and then making Dora , and you do that by CTFAR Circumstances , thoughts , feelings , actions and results . Everything in life happens in one of those five categories . It always happens in that order . Circumstances outside of you do not cause your feelings like stress or uncertainty .

Your thoughts do you have to create a clean energy and alignment when you take the action of making Dara . Adjust the language in your mind until you find that conviction , that complete belief that Allah will answer that Dara Again , by alignment I mean actions . Match the thought and the feelings . Circumstances can be anything in your life .

Match the thought and the feelings . Circumstances can be anything in your life . It could be easy circumstances or difficult A child with autism , constant misunderstandings in the marriage , being in a difficult financial situation . In all of these circumstances you could be making Dora , meaning you could be taking action .

You could be asking for a cure for your illness , or you could be asking that your child be a successful , independent citizen . You are asking for blessings in the marriage or asking for wealth . All of these du'as are actions that you are taking .

I have spoken about creating clean models before , which again just means that your actions are in line with the thoughts and the feelings . In this case , your actions of making du'a is backed up by your complete certainty and belief in Allah that he will answer that du'a .

You are not in a clean model if you are suppressing or harboring any emotions secretly and making du'a despite of them . Like in a case of a dua for health , you are making dua but you are secretly believing it cannot happen . You cannot afford the treatment . You live in a rural area and the treatment options are not available to you .

You have disappointment and sadness being harbored , but you are taking action by pushing against them . So when it comes to CTFAR , you are taking action by pushing against them . So when it comes to CTFAR , circumstance is the diagnosis and action is making du'a . The thought and the feeling does not match the action .

You do believe at some level that Allah can answer any du'a , but you're being realistic . At the same time , you're pushing against disappointment . This is what we have to clean , to create an alignment . When we make du'a , people say my du'as are answered better when I'm in a test , when I'm cornered by a difficult circumstance in life .

I find deeper , more meaningful connection with Allah . When I'm in despair that is the language I usually get they tell me my du'a comes from a deeper place , more meaningful place , when I'm facing a difficulty . But I question this whole premise .

Of course you need power of emotions to make a connection with Allah , to make it more meaningful , but do they always have to be negative emotions ? Have you ever tried making du'a from true gratitude , when you're not in victim mentality , when you're not in despair ? Who says that du'as from negative emotions are more accepted than du'as from positive emotions ?

Allah SWT says du'as require sincerity . Nowhere does it say that your du'a will be accepted when you are only in the lowest and low of life . Replace worry with certainty , grief with love , and practice making dua from this level of energy .

It takes creativity from your mind to be able to do it , but it can be done and in my opinion , it should be done Only because the societal message that we usually get , and usually from traditional scholarship as well , is that you will find more connection with Allah when you're feeling low , downtrodden and feeling beat .

I have heard scholars say that there's an intense emotion behind Dara when you're going through a collapse . And of course , there is emotion behind that kind of a Dua because you're experiencing a discomfort , a negative , difficult emotion . And it is right . You do need intense emotions to escalate the power of your Dua , but those intense emotions can be positive .

Also . Consider making Dua from serenity , appreciation , deep regard , and your prayers will be unprecedented . I promise you . This suggestion that you make better du'as when you're in despair is a type of a colonized thinking from a victim mentality . A human brain is wired to find things wrong .

It remembers negative emotions much better and culture has made it mean that it is the only place to make dua from . Like a millionaire enjoying wealth cannot make dua until she loses a fortune in stocks . Maybe , just maybe , she can make dua in complete wonderment that she was able to create wealth from the will of Allah .

Maybe she doesn't have to hear bad news to be in remembrance of Allah . Maybe she can just remember him in her walks in her private gardens . Imagine that and practice it . This is life-changing , I promise .

So at one level , we're trying to find alignment , trying to find thoughts and feelings that are in line with our actions of making dua with complete certainty , and we are saying that we can do it from positive emotions , not just with negative emotions . So can't alignment just come from positive emotions ? Does it have to be always negative ?

Let's say you've been asking duas from a place of fear , like a fear of hell , or being afraid that you'll never have a child , or being afraid of loneliness in the future . The answer is , of course you can . You can be in total alignment with negative emotions and make intense du'as and this , like I said , is what is actually commonly taught .

But you can also be in alignment with positive emotions In cases like the example of fear I gave you . Admitting that your thinking is causing your fear fear of poverty , loneliness , fear of a bad future and then making dua from that place of fear is totally in alignment .

Remembering my thinking is causing this fear , despair , anxiety and the like and I'm turning to Allah to take care of me in this situation . You can create negative emotions and create alignment to make the dua , but keep the ownership of your emotions .

You can be totally aligned in negative emotions and understand that you rely on Allah to take care of you in negative emotions , and understand that you rely on Allah to take care of you , but what I am saying is that you can totally be aligned in positive emotions and make intense du'a and be relying on Allah to take care of you .

Allah SWT looks for sincerity of emotions . We are taught that sincerity in emotions can only be found when you're feeling uncomfortable emotions , because they feel more intense somehow . But again , that is a cultural narrative . Try making Dara from open elevated emotions like gratitude , joy and peace . You could be crying tears of joy when making Dara .

Yes , you might have found evidence that you were making more powerful Dara when you were in a powerful Dua , when you were in a fight with your spouse and stressed and frustrated about the situation . You fall in Sajda , in Dua because you want a blissful marriage . You are in prostration , asking intensely for this to come true .

And also understand and don't underestimate the power of dua that you make while you're feeling a deep connection with your spouse , experiencing intense love and security and the bliss of your marriage can be a source of making dua . And trust you me , I know how intense and powerful duas are when you're feeling a negative emotion .

It happens to me all the time when I'm feeling stress , anxiety , fear , despair , like nothing can be solved and only Allah can rescue me . Of course there's intensity , but again , all of this is taught from a limited place , because all humans have a tendency to fixate on the negative more . That's our brain's natural wiring .

But the growth here lies with the practice that you can replicate that intensity , that power , that serenity from more peaceful , joyful , positive emotions . So a simple formula is that make Dora from positive emotional intensity three times more than you would from negative emotions .

The ratio of three to one , three times more the quantity of Dora's , after you've tapped into positive rather than negative emotions . This 3 to 1 ratio will put you well in the trajectory of creating extreme depth of connection with Allah , and all while enjoying your experience . And trust me , you deserve that and I hope the difference here is clear .

Don't push against fear , don't ignore that you're afraid and then be making dua that what we just described is misalignment . You can acknowledge the fear and come clean with yourself . That way , you at least have a chance of understanding that Allah is bigger than any fear , even if your brain is generating it .

Make du'as from either positive or negative emotions , but increase your effort of making sincere du'a from positive emotions three times more and then watch your life completely change .

Inshallah , when someone says to me I really love that khushru , that peaceful connection in my prayer when I'm going through a hard time , I think to myself they should really try this with other flavors , like like the flavor of pleasure , pride , amusement . You can totally create khushu , the peaceful , deep , meaningful connection in your prayer from positive emotions .

So I'll give you some more examples to create clarity around this subject and create more contrast , like language in your head could be . You haven't found a nice guy to marry yet and you feel hopeless . Versus , I have so far have been saved from a toxic marriage . My studies are taking too long to finish , versus , I'm taking my education at my pace .

Or I'm 60 years old and too ill to play with my grandchild , versus , I'm alive to see my grandchild . All of these different , contrasting thoughts will create different feelings . I want you to turn the ratio of Dharas to 3 to 1 . Three times more Dharas from positive emotions for one Dharas that you make from a negative emotion .

So I challenge you to create intensity in your Dura from positive emotions . That is not a limitation put on us by Allah , that we only have to ask him when we are lacking something . We are encouraged to make constant Dura , constant remembrance , and please do it from experiencing life to the fullest .

So an objection might arise how am I supposed to do that when I'm in a really desperate situation ? And I will say , even if you're in the most desperate of situations , making the route with the thinking that you have the freedom of thought , you are able to think about your own thinking and feeling .

You can separate yourself from your entire experience , if you wanted , just by observing it . That is a gift of insight . Remembering that you at least have that gift at your disposal and if nothing else , you have your thinking In any situation .

You can approach it by positive thinking , and sometimes you might not want to , and that's appropriate and okay and I respect that . But I also acknowledge that there's always another side to the story that your brain hides from you . Try making dua from the emotions of awe , wonderment and certainty .

What kind of thoughts it will take for you to create certainty behind your action of dua . In a hadith reported by Abu Huraira ra in Al-Tirmidhi and the grade of this hadith is hasan , meaning fair the Messenger of Allah peace be upon him said call upon Allah with certainty that he will answer .

You Know that Allah will not answer the supplication of the heart that is unmindful and distracted . All we're asked to do is find clarity behind our internal environment , find mindfulness , and you can do that by tracking what you're thinking , find what that thinking is making you feel and then make du'a from that alignment .

Since we always up-level your game in this podcast , see if you can make du'as from positive thinking and feeling and practice that over and over again . Stop listening to when people say about how moving of an experience they had while they were feeling extremely desperate . That's because that's all they've practiced their entire lives .

You have my permission to ignore them , or you can tell them about this podcast . That might be a better choice . We can obtain significant connection from positive emotions . We just need emotional energy . It does not have to be desperate emotional energy . So some practical steps again as to how to do that .

One way to up-level your Dora from positive emotions is to live your life by looking beyond the obstacles , not by just looking at them Again . The brain hyper-focuses on what has gone wrong .

Try and remind yourself how will things look when Dharas are answered , when your troubles are over , when things are actually working out , and borrow those emotions , borrow beliefs from the future self by asking what would your life look like after this calamity is over ? What would your future self say then ?

To harness that belief , that complete thought and feeling pair , that alignment you have to envision yourself after the test in life is over , and for that you have to step out of your fear and the resistance of the test . You have to accept it as neutral and you have to look beyond it . Our brains are programmed to create massive problems around little problems .

If you've tapped into alignment of the future self that has come out of the test as a stronger person , you can borrow that gratitude and her belief system from the future and make dua now . Plus , another way to tap into alignment is to look into your life where your duas have already been answered .

Gather evidence of what is possible , of what has been made possible by Allah in your life . This helps you set aside that fear that your lower brain is creating , so that you can then make Dua from a genuine place . Scan your life and see what Dua that you've made has already been answered .

Sometimes , as an exercise , I ask my clients what are the top 10 things you want to make Dua for , and that list always contains the things they don't yet have . Then I ask them to include things in that list that they once made dua for and and they've already been granted that .

So you alternate the list List one thing that you want that you actively making dua for , and list the next thing that you once made dua for and you've already been granted that dua . Using this alternating method list 10 things in your life that will expand your ability for gratitude immensely .

From this exercise you will realize how much power of Dara has already been manifested in your life . For all of these methods , of course , you have to gain the skill of basic emotional intelligence . If you don't know what's in your heart , it will be hard to visualize what lies beyond the obstacle .

It will be hard to make a shift from negative to positive when you're not in tune with your body . Also , sometimes what happens is after we achieve what we want by hard work and showing up in life , despite the discomfort , we have the tendency of forgetting that at some point we were making dua for this .

May Allah protect us all from this kind of forgetfulness . So this alignment with your thoughts and your feelings , which is your inward environment , is in line with your actions and behaviors , which is your outward environment .

If you can't believe what you're making dua for , meaning your inward environment is not matching your outward environment , if you can't believe what you're making dua for , meaning your inward environment is not matching your outward environment , then your action of dua might be hollow .

In this case , borrow the belief system from the future self and by looking at the duas that you've already been granted . There are multiple methods to do this , but these are the two that I want you guys to start with .

Some more examples that you might find applicable are if you're being tested with infertility struggles , how would you act if you had a baby , if you adopted , if you never had a child ? Could that somehow be better for you ? How would you think and feel once this test is over ? Find abundance and make Dua from a future self .

That self believes that everything is from Allah , and this too shall pass and has passed . And you've carved your own way in life and you've found a way to be happy . Maybe it doesn't look exactly what you wanted , but you were able to get there . Ask for a righteous child from that place of abundance and openness .

You will be showing up much more aligned when you ask for Dara from this energy , compared to if you ask for it from a place of fear of what will happen if you never had a child . If you're struggling financially , what is the best case scenario ? What happens when the problem solves itself and you have money and you're out of debt ?

What will you be thinking and feeling ? Borrow those beliefs and ask for Dua in the current moment . How would that situation have made you a better person , a stronger person ? What were the gifts in that situation that you can now see ? Looking back , make Dua from the future self . Who is wiser for having been through this journey ?

If you care for elderly parents and they are hard on you and your experience is lonely and isolating , imagine how would you act if they were gone . How would you act if they were of a healthy mind and body ? There are so many possibilities that you can borrow from the future self . This is where you need to up-level your du'a . From a half-baked .

Yes , I'm showing up with my actions , but my thinking is that I might as well give up , because this is not going to be turning out in my favor . Allah , subhanahu wa ta'ala , of course answers du'as and he answers it in many forms . Du'as don't go unanswered . That is His promise .

I personally am not saying that du'as won't be answered if you're doing it from a half-baked place . From my definition , that is not my call . If it's not answered in this life , it will be answered in the next . But what I am saying is that we have to do our part .

We have to utilize the tools that Allah gave us to elevate our game , to improve how we show up up , because that's all we have control over Creating unrelenting conviction behind our du'as . That's in our control .

Another very common objection I get is that I ask people to align themselves and they tell me they don't need to because they're asking Allah and he is the Almighty and he can answer any Dura , and I agree with that . Allah SWT is capable of everything that's beyond human comprehension . But this objection itself is a cop-out .

This is an excuse for when you don't want to do the work the work of having deep faith and having created unshakable belief , a belief that is unblemished you have to put that work in to achieve that level of alignment and faith . Ask Allah while harboring fear and scarcity and despair is a cop-out . It's the lazy way .

It's like saying I don't want to do the work and then complaining that it didn't work For me .

I practice this in my daily life and when I don't , I make sure that I come back to aligning myself before I make a Dora , and my biggest Dora is that I want to be the answer of other people's Doras , no matter your situation . I hope this message finds you and I pray that I'm able to help someone out there with this work .

I will keep you in my Doras and I ask you to do the same for me . Get coached . If you don't know how to get out of your own way in creating mind-blowing du'as and having unblemished conviction behind them , you can schedule a free consult on my website . I will leave a link in the show notes With that .

I pray that , o Allah all-merciful , that I'm able to remember all the wonderment of your miracles . From all of your capability , I ask for a small miracle for myself that I become the answer to all of Muslim women's du'as . I pray from gratitude of all that you've granted me . I pray for strength so I can become an example for doing the impossible .

From extreme joy , I ask that I'm able to share this knowledge with the masses with ease and flow and grace . O Allah , grant Muslims a supreme understanding of this religion so they can then overcome any colonization or abusive power . Help me expand my mind so I don't limit your capability to answer my du'as .

I leave with a gentle reminder saying that I will not limit Allah with my thinking . May Allah , subhanahu wa ta'ala , grant all of our du'as . I will talk to you guys next time .