Universal Patterns of Change

I figured today was a great day to talk about the basic framework through which all change workers create a difference in people's lives , meaning how therapists , hypnotists , coaches , psychiatrists and the like , with all of their trainings , create healing and improvement in their clients' lives .

There are countless techniques out there to create change , some autodidactic You can learn on your own and implement on your own and see an improvement on your own . Other techniques needing mentorship and expertise , depending on the level of healing you're trying to create for yourself , and today in this podcast , i'm going to try to make sense of it all .

By the end of the podcast , you should have an idea of which technique is the best for you and if change work is actually applicable to you . The ability to create change is always available to you . Every human being on this planet is created strong , empowered and capable of achieving greatness . This is the nature of the innate fitra .

Now , how you define greatness is up to you . I said the word greatness and your nervous system might have gone to the socialist type of explanation , like the hyper capitalist society teaches you . You might have made it mean that I'm talking about wealth , and , yes , that is one possibility . But please feel free to define greatness however you like .

You can pause this podcast if you'd like , but it's important that you have this definition to continue . How do you define greatness ?

Once you have an idea of what that might be , i'm telling you that you were born with all of the primary ingredients to achieve that greatness , meaning you were born with the right intellect , the right inclinations , predispositions , right challenges and strengths to create all the greatness that you ever want .

This path to greatness and the insight into your own strengths gets availed through the effect of the world on us , and when that happens , we seek healing , we seek solutions and thus comes in all the treatment and change work modalities that are out there . Remember , the point of change lies within your nervous system , which connects you to the outside world .

So let's embark on this journey together and discover how we can nurture and heal our nervous systems . The first step is to regulate or , in some cases , downregulate or upregulate your nervous system , and this can be done through various methods , such as deep breathing exercises , grounding techniques or even incorporating relaxation practices like yoga and meditation .

Think of it all as preparing the soil before planting a seed of change . I'm going to attempt to go through most of the change work modalities that are out there , but by no means is this podcast comprehensive . The first one I want to mention is NLP , or Neurolinguistic Programming . It has within itself meta pattern techniques .

These are powerful tools to help reprogram your mind and shift your perspective . It's like rewiring your brain for positivity and growth . Just imagine your mind as a beautiful garden and these techniques are the fertilizer that help you grow , nurturing thoughts , change at the nervous system level , as evident by the name Neurolinguistic Programming .

Then there is psychedelics . This can be done with expert guidance only . Some studies suggest that psychedelics can provide profound spiritual and psychological insights and healing . The western pharmacological industry is quickly monetizing this modality and it will soon become available , but it is expected to be prohibitively costly . But I pray for the best , inshallah .

This level of change through psychedelics has been available for centuries , but it is extremely important to approach this topic responsibly , because psychedelics can only be administered under trained professionals , people who are well versed in integrating these experiences into a holistic healing journey . Nowadays there are a lot of clinics opening up , like Ketamine clinics .

They offer a similar service , where they induce a level of anesthesia on your nervous system through Ketamine , which is a drug that is actually used in anesthesia , and through that they create change in the ongoing lives of the patients . Patients coming out of these treatment modalities find profound healing .

Then there is the polyvagal theory that we spoke about in detail already in the previous podcast . It's a fascinating concept that explores the connection between the nervous system and the body . Understanding the different states of our nervous system through this theory helps us create change at the level of the body . Again , extremely powerful work .

This again can encompass the techniques of yoga , breath work , mindfulness . We call it mindfulness , but it's really bodyfulness . It's the practice of slowing down and enjoying every bite of every meal with its flavors , texture , fragrance . Slowing down to observe the nature with its colors , textures , movements , from large landscapes down to the details of a single leaf .

This type of mindfulness provides a break to the nervous system at the body's level . So it's bodyfulness . This is an excellent gateway for beginners to start to regulate their emotions .

This helps foster a sense of safety and connection Which , if you recall , is the highest state of the nervous system in the hierarchy of polyvagal theory , which is of social engagement , again doing work at the body's emotional level , but through the body's nervous system , while engaging thought work and language to steer the experience all along .

It's all about unlocking the secret code to harmonious interaction . And then let's not forget about enneagrams and personality profiles . These tools allow us to delve deep into self-discovery , uncovering unique strengths , weaknesses and patterns of behavior .

They bring a level of awareness that helps us recognize our own limiting patterns and our strengths , kind of like a treasure map guiding you towards your goals , empowering you to embrace your authentic , true self and your strengths . Then there are all the modalities within somatic therapy .

As a huge proponent of somatic therapy myself , i believe in its strong power to heal and transform . I practice it myself and I teach it to my clients . I absolutely use the techniques in my day-to-day living . It's a big part of me .

Importance of body awareness and treatment that is directed towards body healing and solving for trapped emotions creates a very impactful change . You are probably already engaging in a somatic healing modality , like getting a massage or using aromatherapy to relax , or a chiropractic adjustment . These are all somatic therapy modalities .

You might not even realize Every time you wear your favorite sweatshirt , you're engaging in somatic therapy because it's giving you this sense of calmness and coziness and your nervous system calms down . You are using these calming signals from your body to calm down your nervous system .

For me , it might be every time I get a hug from my husband or I get to have a belly laugh with my kids . All of that is deeply healing somatic therapy . This is one of the most accessible modalities of change available to you . Explore what helps you relax and engage in those activities to calm your nervous system .

For the more complex emotions of past traumas and generational patterns , all of that might require more work and expert guidance . But your body , as a gateway to calm your nervous system , is always available to you . Maybe it's a warm bath , maybe it's exercise , maybe it's a nap , maybe it's an afternoon out with friends .

Whatever calms your nervous system , use this modality to help yourself . You do not need anyone's permission to start creating this level of change . Keeping in mind , whatever level of somatic therapy you're using self-created or under expert guidance you are still targeting the nervous system through it . Then there is change and healing through faith systems .

When we agreed to believe in the teachings of Islam . We program our nervous system with a predetermined code , as set forth by the teachings , as taught to us by the Quran in the Sunnah , and every time you're believing something , you have it deeply wired in your nervous system . A belief is a thought on repeat .

Believing in the mercy of Allah SWT , believing in the messenger , prophet , peace be upon him all of these methods are deeply healing when used correctly .

If you have a history of being wounded with the connection through faith , this modality might not be readily available to you , but it is always available for you to believe that anyone who abuses through spirituality has their own issues to contend with . Sharing this faith system is the deep part of my coaching modality .

I rely on increasing our connection to Allah SWT , increasing connection to our higher brain , which I call increasing your soulful intelligence , or SQ .

We do this level of change work through multiple features in my program , and they include zikr , mindfulness , creating and using khushru and suala as a healing modality , connection with the words of the Quran and creating healing through the Divine word . This doesn't just incorporate religion in your healing journey .

It makes it a centerpiece , tapping into the divine source of tranquility and wisdom , which is your soulful intelligence . This is like finding a hidden treasure within ourselves , guiding us towards a path filled with serenity , purpose , growth , which eventually leads to success and thus to your definition of greatness . All roads lead to Rome .

All modalities heal the nervous system . Some of them might be more fitting for you than others , but they are all available . So start somewhere . Because of this importance of the nervous system , i emphasize the C-near algorithm so much in my work , which stands for circumstances that are independent of N , which stands for our nervous system .

E , which create our emotions . A emotions lead to actions or inactions , then R that lead to a result . When I'm referring to this in this podcast , what I teach in my coaching has to do with the subconscious and the conscious mind . It is very easily encompassed in the C-near formula .

The language of our nervous system , which is the act of thought , is just a fraction of the picture , but through these thoughts we are able to create profound change . So always remember C-near , like you're looking at yourself from near and seeing something clearly for the first time .

Children can be taught the same calming technique that are applied to their nervous system through body techniques If they have anger , anxiety or other issues . Their inside part of the brain is not yet fully developed , meaning they can't pinpoint the problem . They probably can't even use their language to explain it to you .

They just know they don't want to feel bad anymore . These difficult feelings will be showing up in their undesired behaviors . Then , as practitioners , we can teach them self soothing techniques at the body's level . They've invented fidget spinners for this use .

This is to keep the subconscious , add brain occupied , so their ears can then hear what is being said to them .

Kids also have breathing techniques available for anxiety Also something called bilateral stimulation , where you activate both areas of your brain during an anger or anxiety episode by passing a small object from one hand to the other as the hands cross the midline of their body .

The reason behind this is that fight and flight engagement causes tunnel vision , where you are either good to escape the situation or fight it with heightened emotions , while the situation might not be appropriate for either of these reactions .

Then you can teach a child or yourself to employ these techniques at the body's level to activate both parts of your brain , therefore called bilateral stimulation . This way you can go from tunnel vision to a wider view . This gets you into a more resourceful state where you can start to see things more calmly .

Oh my god , i can go forever , but I want to come back to the point When you are trying to make sense of everything that is out there , because you're looking for a way to help yourself , either through an expert , through a guide , through a coach or by yourself .

Now you know what the main method behind the madness is , and you can just pick one modality of change and commit to it

. No modality is wrong or right , they're just different . And also , don't be afraid to make a wrong decision , because a wrong decision is your opinion . There's no such thing as a wrong decision . It is only what you make .

It mean , if you choose therapy and you find out that it's not for you or the therapist isn't a good fit for you , then it does not mean you make a wrong decision . It just means that you learned what is not for you . Fear of labeling your decisions as wrong in the future keeps you from making them at all , which keeps you stagnant .

Worst case scenario you pick a modality of change and it didn't work for you . You'll be back where you are now . But imagine if a modality actually worked And imagine it created the change that you were hoping for . It gave you healing . It gave you grounding , the framework that you were looking for . Then imagine how different your life will be .

We are always worried about what can go wrong with our commitment , and that is the courtesy of our lower brain . But what about giving equal weight to what can go right ? What if what you choose is right ? Stay in that possibility for a little bit and then make a decision . I am , of course , biased towards coaching .

I'm not gonna lie , and this is evident by the name of this podcast . I believe coaching is an extremely efficient tool for creating change for functional individuals . There is a tremendous amount of change that can be created by focusing on thoughts .

Whatever you choose for your inner improvement journey the science of this Kia going from lower brain default to a higher brain upgraded version that will be the right journey for you . We live in a time where you have countless resources at your fingertips . There was a time where people had to travel hundreds of miles just to learn from one mentor .

I find so much gratitude when I think about all of the possibilities available to us . No matter what modality of change you go with , the common denominator will be the same , which will be your nervous system . Your thoughts , emotions , actions , spirituality all intertwine with your nervous system , shaping your experiences .

Point of change lies within your nervous system . That is , your connection to the outside world , your way to recognize the divine and your way to make spiritual connection . Now that we've explored a wide range of change modalities available , it's time for you , incredible Muslim women , to make a choice . Remember , you always have a choice .

Pick what you think aligns with your unique needs , whether it's talk , therapy or thought swapping , body awareness or a combination of multiple of these above approaches . The power to decide is in your hands , just like having to choose an outfit reflects your personality , style . You can choose a modality that speaks to your soul and empowers you on your journey .

And once you start your chosen path , just start to monitor the results . Just take a step back and evaluate your progress , and this can only be done through compassionate observation . This term emphasizes the importance of reflecting on your experiences and choices without passing judgment on it .

You don't have to have a judgment for your choice or for yourself just because you're evaluating something . An evaluation process will not be successful if there is judgment involved , so you have to create a safe and non-judgmental space where you can honestly assess your thoughts , behaviors and other success patterns .

By practicing this judgment-free reflection , you create an environment of self-acceptance , self-compassion , allowing you to gain valuable insight and to make positive change without the burden of self-blame . This is a space of detachment , if you will , because you cannot create change if you keep blaming yourself , and self-blame is Shaitan's best trick .

So what you have to do is observe how your plans are producing results , make adjustments if needed and celebrate small successes . Evaluate your progress in the change modality of your choice and refine your approach . Lather , rinse , repeat . This is how you will fully optimize your healing journey and optimize your greatness .

You create a tremendous amount of healing just by focusing on thoughts alone , because every modality is trying to create change at the nervous system level , and your thoughts are the highest part of your nervous system , your conscious language .

It might look like that you think you need something today , and it might look like you need something entirely different tomorrow . Just stay steadfast on this healing journey and continue with resilience . One of the main reasons Islam as a faith system was granted to us was so that we can achieve our wellness Mental , emotional and physical wellness .

So just evaluate what it is that you need now . You might have needed therapy for years , but you might need coaching or you might need somatic awareness . With that , i pray to Allah SWT . O Allah , bless us with the ability to regulate and heal our nervous systems . Let us find tranquility and connection between our minds and bodies .

Through connection with you , o Allah . Illuminate our paths towards self-discovery and growth , and grant us the courage to embrace change with open hearts . O Allah , we ask you to make this journey easy for us . Please keep me in your doors . I will talk to you guys next time .