Pleasure is allowed

We all know that Halal pleasures of food , wealth , bodily satisfactions are allowed , and not only allowed but encouraged in the halal setting . Hopefully this is not news to any of you . But what I want to talk about today is why pleasure is both rewarding and problematic .

You could say too much pleasure , like much of anything , is problematic , and you would be right , because we know that Islam encourages moderation . So halal pleasure is allowed in moderation . Sugar in moderation is okay . Too much is bad . Food in moderation is okay . Socializing , buying , consuming all of them in moderation is okay , but too much is problematic .

Again , the problem isn't just with the quantity of pleasure we are seeking . The problem is with the intention we have behind it . Intentions are heavily reinforced in Islam in all areas of life . Today we will focus on just one aspect . It is when pleasure comes at a cost of well-being . So terms like pleasure , happiness , joy , well-being get used interchangeably .

But for the purpose of this podcast and for the purposes of coaching at Islamic Life Coach School . I want to clearly differentiate between two key concepts . One has to do with pure carnal pleasure , like instant gratification . Some people call it being happy in the moment , and in large quantities it can be hedonism .

The other concept has to do with joy , fulfillment , wholeness and self-actualization . This is what I call well-being . Pleasure is momentary , well-being is long-lasting . If someone says they are happy most of the time , it does not mean they are in a state of well-being .

It means that they are going from activity to activity to get them instant gratification Over-purchasing , over-vacationing , over-eatingbeing , having to do with the state of joy , fulfillment and self-actualization . So instant gratification , like pleasure , is not wrong , but only when done with the right intentions . Intentions are thoughts .

What thoughts are we acting on when we pursue instant gratification ? You can find out what thoughts you're operating from by the results you're getting . Ctfar circumstances lead to thoughts , lead to feelings , lead to actions , lead to results . So the thoughts or intentions behind the pleasurable activities can be discovered by the results you're living .

At any given time , a human being is living a net negative or a net positive result in life . What do I mean by that ? Activities like hanging out with friends and socializing , basketball time with our children . Not only are these activities are pleasurable , meaning they bring us instant gratification through dopamine . They bring us instant gratification through dopamine .

They bring us a net positive result in our lives . They give us well-being . In the long run , we have a net positive result in life .

The same pleasurable activity can give us a net negative result in our life If your socializing is getting in the way of your studies , if your children are getting in the way of self-actualization , if your work is getting in the way of your family life . All of this can give you a net negative result .

Like I said , even your children can become a reason of a net negative result . If your entire reason of existence revolves around your children and you forget about yourself or your spirituality or other important areas of life , this gives you a net negative result . Net positive result basically means a higher life satisfaction , meaning well-being .

Net negative result means the opposite . You might find yourself at a point in life where pursuing halal activities and pleasures can be giving you a net negative result . Result , therefore , activities have minimal to do with the result and everything to do with the intention behind it .

I have to choose my words carefully here when I say activities of instant gratification have minimum to do with the result of life satisfaction , because it is an extremely slippery slope . Science proves that instant gratification comes from high doses of dopamine released in the brain , that dopamine is extremely addictive to the human brain .

Every time it gets a dopamine hit it requires more for the next time , for the same experience to be more intense . For example , sugar is halal , but when you eat sugar and you get that instant pleasure , your body is going to demand more next time and more the time after that .

One cup of iced coffee or one glass of soda is going to turn into a large and then two servings a day . Highly palatable processed foods carry the same effect , even if they don't involve sugar . So while enjoying dessert or coffee or soda is halal , using the same dessert to avoid negative emotions arising from a difficult situation in life becomes an escape .

The brain would rather go to the escape to the dopamine hit , to the dessert , to Netflix , to the perpetual basketball tournaments , rather than feeling emotions related to problems that life brings .

So you engage in these escapes to avoid the human condition , like avoiding having to face an abusive spouse or your teenager's indiscretions , a busted car , facial , acne , being single , being overweight , struggles with infertility these halal activities , when used as an escape , will bring a net negative result in life . You will be more and more dependent on sugar .

You will engage more and more in people-pleasing activities to keep your friends happy , because if you lose that instant gratification of approval of your friends , then you'll have to go back to facing the non-dopamine hard reality of life . So this is an extremely slippery slope .

Activities of instant gratification have to be kept under strict check and you do that by utilizing your intelligent brain and by being aware of your intentions . Humans only create a net negative result in their life subconsciously . We are only engaging in these highly pleasurable activities because we are subconsciously running away from anxiety , grief , sadness .

No human being will consciously create a net negative result or maybe some people do . But again , we will be held responsible for what we did with the circumstances we were given , which is why it is very important to become aware of your thoughts and intentions and bring them to consciousness .

It is every human being's desire to strive for well-being and self-actualization . We all want a higher life satisfaction and a net positive result , but we attempt to get there by false pleasures and instant gratification . While , again , this is allowed in Islam , it can be a difficult path to navigate .

Here I want to expand a little bit about why instant gratification is so habit-forming . Let's take sugar , for instance . Some studies even compared sugar to cocaine in terms of habit-forming . It elicits the same pleasure neurotransmitter , dopamine without the mind alteration or euphoria of the drug like cocaine .

So someone might ask , why would something so addictive be halal ? Here the emphasis of halal and tayyib comes into play , where what we eat must not only be halal but be beneficial for us . But that topic is out of the scope of this podcast and , inshallah , I will attempt to touch on that later Today . I'm talking strictly about the human need of pleasure .

Pleasurable activities being halal or allowed is a mercy of Allah towards humans . It is such a strong and basic human need .

That is how he created us and he has provided us exact guidance as to how to go about seeking and obtaining this pleasure , with the exception of obviously haram things like sex outside of marriage , alcohol , drugs and other things along those lines , pleasurable activities are spelled out for us .

So you can gain that net positive result by instant gratifications and pleasure at times , but you cannot gain that by just engaging in that instant gratification and dopamine squirts , meaning for a wholesome life .

There needs to be a lot of planning , a lot of delayed gratification and a lot of self-checks Asking yourself am I engaging in this activity to avoid or to run away from a situation or circumstance in my life , or am I engaging in this activity to gain overall net positive result ? That question right .

There is sometimes a very difficult step because we don't like the answer we get . The brain is then forced to make a choice either to face the difficult situation and solve for it through thought , work and feeling work which has no dopamine reward , or it is forced to continue with the highly addictive dopamine squirting activity .

The beauty of this design is that you have that choice . You can continue to engage in that instant gratification . That is halal . But if at any point you decide that you would rather have a life of a net positive result and you remember that you will be held accountable for your actions , then explore the questions of what you are avoiding .

That can be a scary question for some of us and that is why coaching is available

to you . If , as a Muslim , your instant gratification struggles are with alcohol , drugs , porn . You can find help with coaching as well , if it has to do with food , movies , consumption of goods , services or even over consumption of education materials .

Please find coaching , because it is possible that every time you finish that course or that certification , you're seeking that dopamine reward at the end of the activity . But you might be doing this inadvertently and doing it at the expense of your family , spirituality or your higher self-actualization .

So this must sound like a broken record by now , but since humans retain only 20% of what is taught , I will repeat Well-being and wholesome life has minimal to do with the activity you perform . It has all to do with the thoughts behind it . With the activity you perform , it has all to do with the thoughts behind it .

Most of the time when we are living a net negative result , we are unaware of the thoughts behind our actions . All activities that give us instant gratification or a sense of pleasure are addictive .

A study titled Pleasure Systems of the Brain published by the National Institute of Health stated Over the last decades , a growing set of results from neuroimaging studies have suggested that many diverse rewards activate a shared or overlapping brain system A common currency , reward network of interacting brain regions .

Pleasure of food , sex , addictive drugs , friends and loved ones , music , art and even sustained states of happiness can produce strikingly similar patterns of brain activity . So , as always , I'm oversimplifying neuromolecular biology to make it more applicable for us by only mentioning dopamine .

In the end , what it boils down to is that activities that bring us sustained pleasure give us a low , constant supply of dopamine , versus activities that give us high doses of dopamine are the ones that bring us instant gratification . So the brain is seeking dopamine , no matter how you look at it .

If the brain is so sneaky that everything is translated into a pleasure effect , how do we know that we are living a net negative result ? And for that I will ask you to look out for these warning signs . Usually , if you are living a net negative result , you will find yourself living under your potential .

There will be an overall general sense of dissatisfaction in your life . There will be reactivity , frustration and regret . So look for these warning signs and don't ignore them .

People who come to me for coaching are looking for a net positive result , but they don't know how to get there , and it brings me immense pleasure to show them that they can continue to do pleasurable activities and still gain well-being and wholeness , and that is the best part of my job . I come out looking like a hero , really .

So , overall , if you have a constant urge and desire to achieve a goal , do something more to contribute , to create a legacy . That's your brain's way of telling you to create a net positive experience of life . In coaching , people also discover what negative emotions they've been running away from , what calling they're ignoring .

People are also very surprised to find out that they're using seemingly benign , overtly joyful activities to create a net negative experience in life . So if you're at a point where you would like some answers , because your brain search is turning up nothing or the same results keep appearing in your life over and over again , then it's time for coaching .

Please find me at islamiclifecoachschoolcom . The most transformative moments happen during coaching . I've made it a mission in my life to transform as many minds as I humanly can . Inshallah , I'm going to be coaching one-on-one throughout the year 2021 and I will not rest until I've achieved that goal .

So there is a net positive result that I have not mentioned so far in the podcast , and I saved that one for the end because I believe it to be the most important one , and I saved that one for the end , because I believe it to be the most important one , and that is the ultimate net positive outcome of gaining a place in Jannah or paradise .

And how beautiful is this design . Alhamdulillah that we can use our worldly pleasures and align them to get this ultimate reward . You can utilize pleasure , a gift to humans , and still earn a place in Jannah . This is in striking contrast to belief systems that only encourage abstinence from the basic pleasures of life .

I personally don't know of anyone that does not engage in some sort of instant gratification . And for us , as Muslims , to be able to utilize this to create our own path to Jannah is a beautiful mercy that Allah SWT has granted us .

Dr Yaseen Muhammad , a founding member of the International Association of Islamic Psychology and the author of many articles and a book Path to Virtue , writes in an article titled the Idea of Happiness in the Quran . He mentions Surah Yunus , surah 10 , ayah 58 . Say In the bounty of God and His mercy in this , then let them rejoice .

That is better than what they hoard of worldly goods . Thus , if one rejoices in these material bounties purely for the sake of worldly acquisition , then it is blameworthy joy . However , if one rejoices in it as a gift from God and for the benefit it brings , then it is praiseworthy joy .

So what we are calling a net negative and a net positive result in life , he is calling blameworthy and praiseworthy joy . In other place in the Quran , in Surah Al-Hadid 57 , verse 20 , one translation reads Know that this worldly life is no more than play , amusement , luxury , mutual boasting and competition in wealth and children .

One translation reads shaft , and in the hereafter there will be either severe punishment or forgiveness and pleasure of Allah , whereas the life of this world is no more than the delusion of enjoyment . Ooh , sense , chills down my spine . Don't slip on the slippery slope of pleasure . So why go down the slope if there is a high chance to slip ?

Why run after money ? Why eat any pleasurable foods ? Why play basketball ? If these pleasurable activities are going to be addictive and they create a compounding effect that we need more and more each time , then aren't we setting ourselves up for failure ? So you can refrain from all of that . You have that choice . That is available to you .

But to me it's navigating that human struggle while striving for the best . Best in this life and hereafter , inshallah , I can set really high ambitions and goals for myself and check in from time to time if I'm slipping , readjust my intentions and keep moving forward , because you will deviate from the straight path , you will make mistakes , you will slip .

We have established in previous podcasts that mistakes are hardwired in humans . So why not make mistakes while reaching for the impossible ? Why not embrace the discomfort that life has to offer and keep moving forward ? My forward momentum is fueled by my desire of coaching every Muslim woman on this planet , inshallah .

I know it's an ambitious goal , but we all need coaching . Coaching is an outside perspective on your own human brain so you can see what changes to make . Everyone needs that outside perspective . So for me personally , I would rather make mistakes , moving forward , enjoy the halal pleasures , readjusting my thoughts and intentions from time to time .

There are plenty of people out there that will give you advice and tell you to completely abstain from pleasure , and it's fine if it works for you and it finds , if it works for them , more power to all of you . You can't stop sugar altogether . You can't stop watching TV altogether .

You might not even have a TV in your house that is totally available to you , and I wholeheartedly respect that . There are also people that are living an ambitious life and attempting to enjoy pleasures in moderation . Both paths of complete abstinence and moderation have room for error . I have chosen my path and I am proud to say I have chosen it consciously .

I have chosen my path and I am proud to say I have chosen it consciously , alhamdulillah . I will do whatever is available to me to self-correct , including coaching . Yes , I have a coach . This self-correction brings me to the last point I want to make , and that is to do with Ramadan and fasting .

This is a source for self-check for Muslims to see how much they have become dependent on pleasures throughout the year . If you are listening to this podcast outside of Ramadan , you can still practice the restraint from pleasure with fasting on other days . So , basically , humans are wired for pleasure and Allah has allowed pleasure from His infinite wisdom and mercy .

Instant pleasure brings instant gratification because of high doses of dopamine . Joy , well and self-actualization , on the other hand , bring low , sustained doses of dopamine over a long period of time . Dopamine and wholeness have to reset their dopamine meters every now and then and make sure they're not slipping into false pleasure-seeking behavior in the name of joy .

Ramadan brings the benefit of resetting these habits , among the many other physical , psychological and spiritual benefits . That in itself is a way to gain the net positive result in this life and in the life of the hereafter in jannah . So I describe these concepts in detail to come to a conclusion that resetting in ramadan is a must

. Schedules are hectic , sleep cycles are disturbed , but this is to force us to become aware of false pleasures . We have become accustomed to Make use of it . You need it . With that , I pray that Allah make us of those who are able to make the most of the benefits of this Ramadan and all of the future months of Ramadan .

May Allah , subhanahu wa ta'ala , grant us many more of these months and make us of the people that are able to carry these benefits over to the rest of the year . Please remember me in your du'as . Leave me a review on iTunes .

Maybe someone else will discover this podcast and , inshallah , gain benefit because of the review you left and we can all share the blessings Plenty where that came from . Inshallah , I will talk to you guys next time .