As parents we can probably relate to Kevin and Scott who describe family life as chaotic. They are parents of two neurodivergent boys, 7 year old Gavin and 4 year old Arthur. Its clear in this episode that these parents have done their homework and tried to help their boys and their family life but the frustration and uncertainly are ever present. Leslie works with Kevin and Scott to assess and understand the other important ingredients essential for effective parenting. This episode focuses on ...
Jul 22, 2025•40 min
Parenting is an overwhelming job with endless meals, cleanups, and activities. But on top of that, there’s the general overwhelm we're all feeling in our current world, and there are skills you can learn to help manage that daily overwhelm. In this episode Leslie speaks with special guest, Dr. Kiki Fehling. Dr. Kiki Fehling, a licensed psychologist, DBT expert, author and speaker, discusses the transformative impact of DBT on her life and the lives of her clients. Together Leslie and Kiki focus ...
Jul 15, 2025•37 min
Here’s the scenario: Your 8 year old child just got a formal diagnosis of ADHD in addition to the dyslexia diagnosis. Your 12 year old son is also neurodivergent whose behaviors include humming, interrupting and fidgeting. How does a family learn to get along with all of these differences which create tension in both the children and the parents. In this third and final session with Krystal and Burt, Leslie works directly with the parenting differences…Krystal expresses her concerns about Margot...
Jul 08, 2025•49 min•Season 3Ep. 91
Kids fighting in the car is a common occurrence and is often a headache for most parents. This is a mini-bonus episode where Leslie and her producer Alletta Cooper discuss a number of strategies to help kids sit with discomfort, learn to deal with boredom and maybe along the way have some time to daydream - a way to exercise a valuable part of the brain. Screens and phones are not on the Do-Not-Use list but rather are understood for ways in which they too can be helpful. Time Stamps 2:15 The arr...
Jul 03, 2025•20 min•Season 3Ep. 90
When kids get their own phone there’s a big adjustment for everyone. And it doesn’t always go smoothly. This is my second session with Krystal and Burt where we find out how they are doing and if they did their homework to find small ways to connect. This session focuses on 12 year old Mat who gets in trouble with his phone and what parents can do when that happens. We also focus on 8 year old Margo who advocates for her own needs which is in sharp contrast to Mat’s people pleasing tendencies. T...
Jul 01, 2025•47 min•Season 3Ep. 89
There is so much going on in a family between raising the kids, making a living to provide for the family and managing a household. In today’s session, we meet Krystal and Burt, a family based in the UK who have 2 children, 12 year old Mat, and 8 year old Margo. They recently moved to a rural farm with animals that they also raise. Making time for the kids, making time for the relationship and running their lives is what Burt called “volume overload”. And it is through that lens of “volume overl...
Jun 24, 2025•54 min•Season 3Ep. 88
Sibling Rivalry is a great opportunity to practice conflict resolution. In this episode we talk about the steps to help you resolve conflicts with your kids. But these same steps (easy to explain and difficult to practice) can be used with all relationships that experience conflicts. Leslie explains the steps to conflict resolution and highlights the one step that is often forgotten and without it can sabotage any attempts to resolve the conflicts. Leslie and her daughter Dale discuss these step...
Jun 17, 2025•30 min•Season 3Ep. 87
There is so much fear in parenting, it just comes with the territory. Fear of kids fighting, fear of kids growing up too fast, fear of kids being influenced by peer pressure and engaging in behaviors that upset you. In this episode, Leslie works with Anna on noticing and naming her fears so that her fears don’t end up making things worse. Anna is homeschooling her three children, 8yr old girl, Sasha 5 yr old Kate and 2 yr old Daniel. And Anna updates us on the changes in the level and intensity ...
Jun 11, 2025•44 min•Season 3Ep. 86
Sibling rivalry seems like your kid’s problem. But for most parents its not easy to tolerate all that bickering and figuring out when to step in can be confusing. In today’s session, you meet Anna, a mother of three children, 8, 5, 2 who learns that what she is doing is actually making the sibling rivalry worse. She and her husband emigrated from Ukraine in their twenties but brought with them their own experiences of growing up. Learning a bit about her history brings light to her current situa...
Jun 03, 2025•52 min•Season 3Ep. 85
In today’s episode, Leslie speaks with special guest, Dr. Lorie Ritschel, a board-certified dialectic behavior therapist, and discusses the impact of chronic invalidation, trauma and shame in regards to both parents and children. Lorie emphasizes the importance of understanding and addressing shame in children, noting that parents often underestimate its punishing effects. She explains DBT-PE, a treatment that combines dialectical behavior therapy with prolonged exposure to treat trauma. Time St...
May 27, 2025•38 min•Season 3Ep. 84
Parents often go to therapy when the rewards and punishment no longer work because trying to get your child to do what you need them to do can be very challenging. And when the parent’s anxiety gets added to that mix, the result is frustrating and overwhelming for everyone. This is the final session with Nicky and AJ as they discuss getting their 11 year old daughter Lilly off to school each day and getting her to clean up after herself. Time Stamps 3:46 Ask yourself “did it feel more effective ...
May 20, 2025•39 min•Season 3Ep. 83
Making requests, saying no, and having hard conversations is part of all relationships. And it's rather easy to see how common misunderstandings and conflict ensues in our interpersonal relationships. That's because we are not born with accurate and effective communications skills. This mini bonus episode is about learning and practicing the DBT skill called DEAR MAN. This is a conversation between Leslie and her producer, Alletta Cooper where they give an in-depth description of what the skill ...
May 15, 2025•22 min•Season 3Ep. 82
We take you “behind the scenes” of what happened before the session officially started. This episode with Nicky and AJ begins with a communication breakdown. We all struggle at times communicating with our kids, our partners or other family members. You will learn what happens when shame is in the drivers seat of your life and when shame runs in the family like with AJ and their 11 year old daughter, Lily. The episode also emphasizes the importance of vulnerability for personal growth and effect...
May 09, 2025•47 min•Season 3Ep. 81
How do you deal with your child’s anger and defiant behaviors? One place to start is to look at what you as parents bring to the table and how that impacts your child. This is the second session with Nicky and AJ who are seeking help for their 11 year old daughter Lily. We cover a wide range of topics from the emotional topics of trauma and anger to learning some practical communication skills. Time Stamps 3:00 Pausing, listening, validating and being curious was effective for communication with...
May 06, 2025•47 min•Season 3Ep. 80
Parents often wonder why their children won’t do what they ask them to do. This often creates conflict and disrespect in the family system. And for the parent, it's very confusing and irritating when you “couldn’t get away with that” when you were a child. In this episode, Nicky and AJ share their concerns, frustrations and fears regarding their 11 year old daughter, Lily. Lily has had big emotional reactions throughout her life and Nicky and AJ are fearful for her teenage years. They also admit...
Apr 29, 2025•47 min•Season 3Ep. 79
In this episode, Leslie and special guest Jen Sims, a licensed professional counselor and registered play therapist, talk about the importance of play. Jen explains that play is the language of children, allowing them to express emotions and experiences. She specializes in Non-directive Play Therapy, which involves creating an environment where children can fully engage in play without feeling hurried. Jen emphasizes the principles of empathy, congruence, and unconditional positive regard, and d...
Apr 22, 2025•34 min•Season 3Ep. 78
It's not unusual to feel stuck or trapped as a parent. Having options is the antidote to that feeling. You have options for how you think, how you behave, how you deal with emotions. And those options put you in the drivers seat…you get to see and feel the choices you have and you get to choose! This episode is the third and final episode with Jean and Alex who are dealing with their 6 year old daughter’s big emotions. We focus on how to change your mindset and review several coping strategies t...
Apr 15, 2025•49 min•Season 3Ep. 77
Parents get exhausted because parenting is exhausting. Parents also can get exhausted because they are in essence tripping over their own feet. Have you ever thought that your worry thoughts are the thing that is contributing to your exhaustion? Whether it's your child or yourself, worry makes people uncomfortable. In this episode, we talk about teaching her child to handle discomfort through exposure work. And when parents practice what they preach, their children are so much more likely to lea...
Apr 08, 2025•46 min•Season 3Ep. 76
This is the third mini bonus episode that looks at rigid thinking which is quite common in both adults and children. It often leads to frustration and even conflict within yourself and in your relationships. In this episode, we explain problematic thinking patterns, identify lots of examples and how to catch and change your thinking to help you live more effectively to get what you want and deserve. Time Stamps 1:40 Definition of Rigid thinking and its various names: All or nothing thinking Blac...
Apr 03, 2025•17 min
Children need to feel safe and capable as they venture out into the world. Jean and Alex are parents who came to me for help with their 6 year old daughter’s challenging behavior when she didn’t feel safe or capable. Ellie is a highly sensitive child for whom getting a shot and then taking off the bandaid have turned doctor visits into scary events for both Ellie and her mom. In this episode we assess the problem and discuss how rigid thinking make these situations so difficult and ultimately wh...
Apr 01, 2025•41 min•Season 3Ep. 74
One of the more common questions parents ask is when do I give in and when do I stand firm. Todays special guest speaker is an expert on this question. Amy Kalasunas is a board certified Dialectic Behavior Therapist who, among other things, provides interventions for parents of struggling and complex young adults using DBT and SPACE, which stands for Supportive Parenting for Anxious Childhood Emotions. We talk all about how parents can make an effective decision as to when to accommodate to thei...
Mar 25, 2025•39 min•Season 3Ep. 73
This is the second mini bonus episode where we will focus on understanding shame. In this bonus episode we discuss the difference between shame and guilt, the beliefs and myths associated with shame and an effective skill to deal with shame. Shame was present in the third session with Sarah in its many forms. Our children can feel shame even when we try very hard not to shame them. As parents we can easily feel shame that we carry from our childhood or trying to do this job called parenting. And...
Mar 20, 2025•15 min•Season 3Ep. 72
Shame is a common emotion but a painful one as well. In this episode we talk about shame and its many forms. Children feel shame, parents feel shame and we can unintentionally pass down shame to our children. This is my third and final session with Sarah, a mom of two boys James, 12 yrs old and Noah 15 yrs old. Sarah and her husband are both ex-military and we discuss the impact of military life on mental health and how that impacts the family. It may be surprising to learn that in this episode ...
Mar 18, 2025•55 min•Season 3Ep. 71
Kids are not the only ones who are controlling and trying to get what they want. As parents we do the same thing. We really want what we want and we act in controlling ways to achieve those ends. This is the second session with Sarah, mother of 2 boys, 12 year old James and 15 year old Noah where we explore topics, including when one sibling tries to parent the other, when children feel responsible for their parents’ emotions, how to let our kids make mistakes and how to be a less controlling pa...
Mar 11, 2025•42 min•Season 3Ep. 70
Welcome to the first mini-bonus episode where I focus on one or two key concepts or skills in a conversation with my producer Alletta Cooper. Every once in a while we will add one of these bonus episodes to further explain a concept/skill that came up in the previous session. In this episode I explore and explain what the parent-child fit is and why it is so important. In parenting, there are often conflicting needs and wants. Navigating these dilemmas and finding solutions is critical for creat...
Mar 06, 2025•17 min•Season 3Ep. 69
Welcome to Season 3! We start this season off with a family from Australia. Sarah is a mom of 2 boys- James is 12, Noah is 15, Sarah and her husband are both ex-military personnel which has a direct impact on their parenting. In today’s episode we discuss how Sarah’s parenting style matches with James who has been recently diagnosed with ADHD, Autism, and Oppositional Defiance Disorder. Many parents can probably relate to Sarah who tween is a really good negotiator especially when it comes to ge...
Mar 04, 2025•42 min•Season 3Ep. 68
Help us shape Season 3 of Is My Child A Monster? ! For the first time ever we’re doing a listener survey. You have the opportunity to tell us what you love —or would love less of — on Is My Child A Monster! The anonymous survey should take less than 10 minutes, and you’re welcome to answer as much or as little as you like. We’d love your thoughts even if you’ve never listened, help us understand why! Or maybe this is a good time to check out an episode. Click here to fill out the survey. Visit i...
Jan 21, 2025•1 min•Season 2Ep. 67
Do you need feedback? Of course you do. We all do! But giving and receiving feedback whether it's from or to your child or co-parent can be challenging. Feedback can often feel like criticism and can even feel invalidating. This episode is all about giving and receiving feedback skillfully so that you or the other person doesn’t become defensive or shut down. Today’s episode welcomes back Leslie’s daughter Dale Rubury who shares how she moved from the defensive stance as a child to the open and ...
Oct 08, 2024•47 min•Season 2Ep. 66
Exposure to books makes a big difference for children. Reading not only fosters cognitive and emotional development but also builds closeness and routines. This week, Leslie spoke to author Deborah Farmer Kris about her experience as a teacher and parent, highlighting the unique needs of each child and the intellectual and emotional challenges of parenting. Kris also promotes the use of public libraries and simple, consistent reading routines. Kris's books, including those in the "All the Time" ...
Oct 01, 2024•41 min•Season 2Ep. 65
An unspoken agreement with parents raising children is that they will be on the same page and they will be a united front. But that is often easier said than done. In part 3 of our 3 part series with Mary, her husband Antoine joins us to discuss what happens when they disagree, how it affects their 6 year old Oliver, and what they’re doing to make sure they come back together in healthy ways. Time Stamps 7:34 What does “being on the same page” mean to you? 9:51 What does it mean when your child ...
Sep 24, 2024•51 min•Season 2Ep. 64
