TALKBACK TINGZ: The best John Laws blow ups 📻

Is It Just Me' podcast by a couple of Miches.

Right now, it's time for talkback teams. Talkback teams, that's where I bring the little bits of gold that I find when I'm listening to talkback radio.

Yeah, I do love it.

It's a really different world to the one that you live in the FM bubble.

FM is crazy. I have so many like I've got like a really tight criteria that I have to fit into.

Yes, no such criteria applies to AM radio. In fact, I don't think any criteria applies to John laws Ah if.

You don't know him, if you're in the States. Howard Stern, I'm a radio fen so I love this year Howard Stern Australia like a car, Sanderlans, Alan Jones, Shock Jock bab.

Even then like way older and way more withered. He literally retired with it in the year two thousand and seven. But then he was just like I'm bored and he came back in twenty eleven. Did he retire, Yes, And it was like a big deal when he retired. He's now at two SM. Now, for context, two SM is the station that aren't even in the ratings anymore because they were rating so poorly that they just decided to opt out. They're like, we don't want to know.

But then who pays him because he's on Jenna? Can you google how much his mental don't google that.

We don't need to keep throwing you to google shit.

I just want to know how much he makes. I want how much. I just don't have to confirm the Google either. Jenner Ah.

But like he very famously retired in two thousand and seven, Like I said, he's now back at two s M, the Shiitter station in Sydney, and they will not pay for marketing. So there are so many people that literally don't know he's back on air. It's like he's like he's like a little off Broadway secret Now he's BCC to the radio or and so every single time utunity John Laws. By the way, my father listened to John Laws, so growing up it's all I heard. I'm very familiar

I'm John Laws.

Sounds very old fashioned.

Of the matter, is this a married aren't you mad? Not that you're at a Goozman is on Tuesday.

So he sounds quite quaint, almost wholesome, but he is he is prone to losing his patience pretty quickly. He tolerates no nonsense when it comes to his callers. Take a listen to.

This nonetheless, be quiet, be quiet, be quiet, I will now, Susan, would you just shout up for a minute?

Or this particular one, This is one of my old favorite It's one of my favorite tantrums of his.

I'm second tired of having to listen to rude, arrogant, ill informed, stupid women like you.

So, even though he's insulting these people, he has a way of stringing together words that just sound correct together.

Yeah, it's very eloquent.

He makes insults sound eloquent, which is a skill I would love to have.

You're almost there.

I know I'm getting there. I'll just keep insulting you as my guinea pig until I get there. Okay. But he has this one particular caller who was like a notorious hater of his. He calls the show regularly. His name's Norman. Norman has been calling him for years. All through my teens, I heard Norman.

He knows Norman.

Yes, literally like a week ago, Norman called and started complaining about Kyle Sandaling, Oh our guy, and they played they played the order on Kyle and Jackie. O. The reason I bring that up is because how long have I been waiting to play this Norman audio and our show?

Mitchell, Oh, as soon as we have the idea for this show. Yeah, this was happening.

Thank you. I don't want to look like I'm copying Kyle and Jackie all right now. I was sitting at my death and they were playing Norman audio and I was like, I'm playing that on the show next week.

And I wake up to a text and You're like, Kyle and Jackie are playing the Norman audio. I was like, did you be see them on this?

Anyway?

This is a long time coming, the Norman audio exactly.

So here's one of my favorite Norman blow ups. And I want you to take note of just how eloquent he is, even though he's like dealing with a hater and basically getting into a beef with this guy. Take a listen, give.

Us a call, tell us what's on your mind? One three hundred and five? Oh is it really Norman? Is it you?

It's me?

Don't you?

Didn't you say that your program goes all over the country. Yeah, well, aren't they bored about Sydney traffic? Probably you're doing the rest of the nation about Sydney traffic.

But it's very important to the people in Sydney, Norman.

But the worst of.

The country, I couldn't give a stand.

No, no, no, no, Norman, Norman, Norman. There are people out there in the bush saying, oh God, listen to that. Aren't we lucky to live in the bush? We give them the opportunity to extol the virtues of their own environment.

Now you're just boring them senseless like you usually.

Do, extol the virtues of their own environment. Isn't that beautiful?

Yeah, Jenna, are you compiling about this job? You're beach, But you just need to extol the virtues of this environment.

Isn't that just like he's so eloquent. That was impressive, right, it goes on? Okay, I want you to listen out for the rest of this, Norman call. I want you to listen out to the most perfectly phrased insults you've ever heard in your life. I'm not over hyping right now. Take a listen, Norman.

I've been getting reports about you? Are you? Are you fat? Overweight?

I don't answer your question, Sean with Fetcher's funeral?

Have you cleaned jaws?

Have you written it all?

You have? You?

You know?

Going into you know the funeral. Who's going to speak?

No? Norman nor Norman? Norman, Norman, Norman. You've got to remember, I won't know I'm dead here, but.

Your feet weren't anybody lining the streets? And go and cry over your death?

I'm telling you, Norman Norman, why do you listen to the program? I can now the truth is coming through you secretly? Love me?

No, I don't, John, I hate you, I hate you? You care?

You care?

Norman Norman? What a what a screwed up, dreadful little grub of a human being? I think I might I think I might have be stretching it a bit calling you a human being. But never mind, We'll give you the benefit of the doubt. Norman.

Somebody retire. I just think of you. Why won't you do it?

Listen? Norman Norman. When I did retire the it was a front page in his story and the big headline was the end of an era. How do you like that?

I'm not I'm not.

It's going to be such a joyous occasion when you.

Die, Norman, You're forgetting on this momentous occasion. I'm going to be dead.

It won't be long. It won't be long, John, everybody out there voicing and hoping.

Norman, Norman, Norman and Norman. Enough is enough is enough? Norman, enough is enough. You're just a nasty human being, and really you're a bit entertaining for about the first five minutes or so. After that you become well, you show your true covers, which aren't very pleasant. Yellow in the main, I might say, but you're just a nasty human being. And I don't know how you've got anybody around you probably haven't got anybody around you, and that's why you

How savage but graceful.

Please don't bother to bother sound Edgar Allan Poe repeat after me.

Screwed up, dreadful, little grub of a human being.

Let's all say it, Jenny, you two three two one screwed dreadful.

I want that on my gravestone.

That was intense, wasn't it.

Just can you play that last bit again? I just want to hear that one insult.

Yeah, what a screwed up, dreadful little grub of a human being? You?

Oh? I feel I feel a bit upset because the way he talks to his callers is he's got power. On my show at night, I did the exact same thing. I take calls constantly for three hours and my callers talk to me like that.

It's the opposite dynamic.

They're so rude to me.

I'm gonna call you with my phone on privates you don't know, and be like, what I screwed up dreadful little grub of a human being?

What do they say to you?

That's so rude?

Oh?

I like last week I had the privilege of giving out business class fights to the UK. Yeah, yeah it thanks to who Eddie Ad. The reason I ask is give me I've got the credit wrong. Who did you say?

Again?

Don't matter.

I legally can't say this another airline that begins with me, But thank you?

Who should have you said? Eddie ad? Eddie?

Thanks to Eddie, I've got a great deal on the moment to be Jenna and I flew Eddie had to London and it was like not because of them, it was horrible. The flight to London is just horrible in general. But I had made it as good as they could.

Oh yes, of god, I didn't where that was going.

Then did you keep your Eddie had I'm asked dinner.

I sure do, I have it.

I have it at my house and.

We work breakfast radio hours. Sometimes the sun's still up with my birth fleet. We've got to use that ship.

Indeed, Eddie adds great. Anyway, they gave me business class fights to give away on the show. All week. It was huge, and then this week I've gone back on air and I do my usual programming and on Tuesday nights, so I do a ten cent Tuesday and I don't get a budget, but there's a coin person in the office, so I take ten cents and then I flip it and people have to guess heads or tails, and they get it right, they win the money. I send them the ten cents and postage is a dollar twenty. The

You got to start collecting them and then play them for It's the way that your callers treat you is the same way that John Laws treats his callers with absolutely no courtesy or respect.

Oh, I'll start collecting them.

He can be charming when he wants to be John Laws, but he can also tear you a new asshole, as you just heard.

How much is you get? Paiger? Did you find out he.

Has a net worth of twenty million?

What's your net worth? If you had to assume based on everything?

You've got the same budget you've got for giveaways on your night show? Ten cents? I love the podcast, but what more in between episodes?

Then join a group, sport you lazy third, or go borrow a library book. Meanwhile, you can follow the show online as a couple of minchens.

Yeah, give us a follow, leave us a review, don't forget five stars please. Speaking of groups, bour it's brad Olvia guys.

Just so good.

Yeah, of course, did you what did you do growing up?

Well? Nothing that therein lies the issue while I was quite a large child.

Oh you couldn't run on the grass in bergan Gate because that was the crops. I was gonna play soccer down.

No, don't run on that.

That's the Livelihart, that's the car.

Apparently I played soccer when I was five, but the coach had to politely after my mum to stop bringing me because I wasn't playing soccer. I was running around the field picking up leaves.

Missus Coombs, you're gonna have to pick yourself up. He's using the ball as a disco ball hole and he's grinding on the field. The other boys are very uncomfortable.

He's pole dancing against the goalposts.

The ball isn't even a ball, it's a pumpkin.

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