Is it just me a podcast by a couple of midget I've got a moral conundrum. I need your two cents on here. Okay, So if you've been keeping a close eye on my Instagram, you would know that I'm currently in my walking era.
I've got you muched, unfortunately, but I can imagine that's fun.
Well, I'm making it known that I'm in my walking era because I really was not getting enough steps in my day.
Yeah, there was one fucking.
Day that I had a low of forty nine steps.
Mitchell. That's shocking.
I know, I know exactly what happened on that day. I had a big night, I was hungover, I woke up, walked to the office, edited this podcast. On a Sunday, I uploaded it, went back to bed. Wow that was my forty nine step day. And I was like, right, okay, I need to fucking up the end of here. I got a notification the other day saying, oh, your average daily steps have risen this month. Fuck goes that?
Hell done? How done?
That's big. But the thing is, I've got this weird, fucking toxic trait where I hate aimlessly walking. I don't like to just go for a walk for no fucking reason.
That's the point of it. But the reason is you're going to better your health.
Yeah, but that's not enough of me. I like to kill two birds with one stone. I'm an afficient honey. So, like you know, people usually ge pissed off when you get a little slip from the post office you have to go pick it up. I'm like, perfect an excuse to walk. That's two k's both ways.
Oh so you need something to do.
Yes, I need to be walking for a reason. Otherwise it feels like a waste of time, which I know is a stupid way of thinking about it.
What about what about if you aim to finish a podcast?
Well, sometimes podcasts are getting shorter and shorter these days.
Yeah, they really are.
And also what happens is I'll hit play on the podcast in the house, and then I'll start procrastinating, and then the podcast is nearly finished and I'm like, I haven't even started the walking.
I do the same thing. I take phone calls when I walk. I prefer to chat to people. Yeah, yeah, I do call my family, call you meet you when i'm walking.
Have I ever gotten a walking call for you?
Yeah? You have. If I'm out of breath and sound like I'm about to die.
Then. Yeah, but one of my friends came up with a suggestion because I don't like to walk for no reason. They said, why did you become a dog walker? And I was like, fucking bingo. I love that because not only do I need a reason to walk, but I also need accountability.
And you're getting paid.
True, well, I wouldn't even fucking charge. I don't mind. I just want to be able to have a reason to leave. And also someone's expecting me there at a certain time in a certain days, so I have to actually go. I can't bitch it. Yeah, because, yeah, that's that's the Why do you think I'm going to politis classes? Because I have a time and a place to be there.
You hate dogs? You're a cat guy.
I'm actually not. I was always a dog person. The reason I didn't get a dog was because I was working here and didn't have time.
To walk it.
Okay, fair, fair, But now that I'm a lady of leisure, essentially I've got time to walk dogs.
So you're gonna put a little tear off on a post it note around town?
Well, I actually signed up to I don't know it's sort of like a dog walking market place. It's an hour.
Why does it exist? What's it called?
What is it called? Actually, it's called not sponsored walk and Wall. No, it's called Porchhake Porsche.
That's funny. Yeah, it's a very funny name.
And so this was months ago. I set up my poor Shake profile. I got Chat GBT to write a description. It's like, I'm a passionate, enthusiastic dog walker, blah blah blah blah, fucking mad about dogs.
My toil is wagging at the thought of walking.
Your beloved wouldn't have said tail wagging? Jesus, what's my tail?
Oh? Stop it?
But anyway, this was months ago that I signed up to be a dog walker, and I honestly fucking forgot. This week I got my first inquiry. Oh my god, my first customer. But this is where the moral dilemma comes in.
Oh you fuck them? No, sorry, I don't know.
So they've inquired about me walking their gorgeous little dog named Ladybug.
Okay, do you have a photo of Lady book.
I'm trying to find it. But I think Poor Shake might be fucking glitching at the moment because it keeps saying four oh four being not found. I did have a photo of Ladybug. I'd love to show you one of those little fucking black mare tea things. No, not like a what do you call it? Fuck black French bulldog? Okay, And so they are going away for three weeks and there's a few days a week that their partner isn't home. So they want me to do Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday.
Okay, right for.
Three weeks, and so they want me to do it, and I really want to do it. However, here's the fucking problem. Right, two of the days I'm going to be in fucking Ularu. Ah oh, and so tomorrow I'm doing my meet and greet with Ladybug to make sure I'm a good fit. Do I or do I not flag that I'm actually not available?
Oh?
No, because I really want to do it. I'm so excited.
You can't get Ai to help me with this one. AI can't walk the fucking dog. You need to be honest. You have to tell them that you can't. You're in Ularu unless you want to take ding fucking beetle with you there and walk him around the red dot. Otherwise, no, but I.
Really want to do it, and I'm like, if this person's away for three weeks, how would they even know? I don't if I don't turn up and walk it.
That's the more mma. Okay, I was thinking just tell them no, but I get it you're thinking of.
Lying as I really want to walk this fucking dog. I'm so excited. It's so funny.
How many days would you not be able to walk it?
I think they're asking me to walk it three times a week for three weeks, so that's nine, So two out of nine. I think that's fine.
The dog can have a rest.
But I can't just leave the dog unattended, No, I would have to give the key to a friend or something.
Wait, are you also feeding this dog day and every day and night?
We haven't nutted out the details yet. I have my meet and greet tomorrow.
So they must be. If you're only working it twice a week or three times a week, someone else must be coming to feed it every other day because you've got to feed the dog morning.
Another partner. So it's a couple. One of them's going away for three weeks, the other one is kind of in and out of the house sometimes they're sometimes not. And so the days that poor little Ladybug is home alone, that's when they've enlisted Mitchell the darlingdog walker from Paulshake dot Com Dotteue to come in and pick up the slack. But I don't want them to hire someone else. If I tell them I can't do these days, they might hire someone else.
Mitchell, there's plenty of dot and I'll.
Have all nine shifts ripped out of my hand.
Shifts sound like a fifteen year old about to work at McDonald's. No, say no, you don't want to be to be involved in the death of a dog.
Why would it die?
You just don't know. I catastrophize everything. So what if poor little gumdrop got hit by a vase or something when you weren't home, but you were meant to find it the next day, but you didn'tcause you're in the red center.
But I wouldn't leave the dog there without anyone checking in. But would you get somebody else? You know? Is that an option? I don't know either. I'm honest, and I tell them there's two days I can't do here, and I risk them pulling out all together and going with someone else, or I.
Say sure, I'll be there, Mitch.
I'll be there, But then I just give their house cays to another friend. You may can go look after Ladybug.
Are you angling that you want me to go and fill in for your two days and look after that?
And I was hoping you'd offer. I think that's a great idea.
What are the dates?
Monday and Tuesday, the fifth and sixth of June. Perfect anytime between an am and four pm, just half an hour amazing.
Oh, I actually can't. I can't Monday. I could Tuesday, but I can't Monday.
I might be too confusing for poor little lady. Multiple new faces in the house.
She would love me. I do smell of beef brisket, so she really enjoy my appearance. But then that would confuse her. If I'm coming in, then you're coming into the third gay man's coming in too much.
I'm really confused now because the poor shake app it seems to be working, but my message history is gone.
Oh my god, they've blocked you.
I'm not kidding, they've blocked you. Like I checked this half an hour ago because I wanted the photo up on my phone to show you what Ladybug looks like, and now I don't have any message.
Have you been ghosted by Ladybug? Ghosted?
No, I'll be very up.
This has devastated I'm really sorry. Wait broke it, aren't we not necessarily not necessarily no, but I'm all all likely.
So look, look, when I click view message in my email, they let me know when I've got a new message. Of course, they said, are you able to do a meet and greet this week? And I said sure Friday? When I clicked that four o four page cannot be found. Is it glitching or have I been ditched?
Mitchell, you've been I think you've been dished. Is there a phone app you can check?
I'm trying that too.
Oh, then you've been ditched. I'm shattered. Hold on, Maybe Ladybug has passed and they've pulled blisting.
That's possible. Wait, look on the phone app, the messages doesn't work, neither it's anything else. So maybe it is just a fuck up with the website. I could still be in the running to be Ladybug's part time babysitter.
I can't imagine poor Shake's getting enough foot traffic to have an on demand tech team.
So poor traffic.
Apologies yes, you're right, Portra.
I love watching the cogs in your brain turn decend like what Yeah, I didn't get.
It and I did get it. All right. Well I'm not helping you, but I don't think you'll need help because I think you've been fired. Yeah, apologies there, Yeah, sorry about that moral conundrum and fixed.
Yeah, at least you have an answer.
Yeah, you've got your answer.
But that was my first inquiry in months.
That says something about your profile. We need to give it some work. If that's your first bite in months, what are you doing wrong?
You were just the one accusing Porshake of not having that much foot traffic. So poor traffic, poor traffic?
Thank you? Oh no, well, how.
Else am I supposed to advertise that I want to walk people's dogs?
Print out a piece of paper, you cut little flat things at the bottom, and then you put it on a flag pole.
I don't want to give out my fucking mobile number.
All right, If you are in the Sydney metropolitan area and you need your dog walked, and that's not a euphemism, a wolf wolf Mitchell will do it for you, but not in the dates that he is in the red center because he's busy. Yeah, there you go, transparency open. I reckon, you'll get bookings, Mitchell. All you need to do is senters a text to what.
Number over one two seven, two nine two.
That's all right. Also, if you've got any other animals, Mitchell, walk them. You can walk around, but these days, you know, in the world.
I've had experience with guinea pig handling. I can walk a guinea peap Yeah.
He host this show with me every week, so he can handle a rodent.
Yeah, you got the pig bit right.
All right, Well, good luck, Mitchell. Keep us up to date with your new your newfound venture. Is It Just Me a podcast by a couple of mitches. Make sure you've hit follow on your podcast aff