BONUS: Best Bits of Season 3 (so far!) 🎧

Is it just me a podcast by a couple of mitches.

Gooday, guys, welcome to the podcast. It's one of the two Mitches here with you today, Mitch Coombs. That is, I'm doing a bit of a best bits episode for you today. I know we only usually do this at the end of every season of the podcast, but we're on a bit of an Easter break at the moment. You might have seen on Instagram Mitch Cherry having a gay old time up in Queensland, and I thought, Baggert,

Is it just me?

You love to live in a retirement home? Not now?

Not now?

No, I mean now, I'm ready thinking about it.

They have pretty cool facilities. We've been through quite a few in your time, I have, I have. Are we talking village or like a home?

Yeah, so nursing homes. I'm pretty sure that's where. It's basically just a long hallway with a bunch of bed that's kind of hospital esque. I don't mean that, I mean like it's almost like a resort. Everyone's got their own little unit and the car port. You've still got all the perks of, like having the nurses checking them

Oh, I've heard of it. I've never seen it.

It's on Foxteel and it's like an Australian one, and it had that cliche storyline of where the grandmother gets so upset. I can't believe you're putting me into a home.

Classic I'm you know, I'm I'm fine.

Yeah, that sort of thing, and I'm like, you shut your mouth. It looks awesome. They had like craft club, they had like all these activities and things that relied me of O week when I was joining every and I was like, I'm so ready for that because you've still got the independence. It was like your own little villa. But then you've got other people looking after you, and there's a sense of community. You've got the clubs and you've got fucking school kids coming to sing your Christmas

But so you have your own house essentially on the show.

Yes, And I'm sure there's other setups like that they look.

Price it's reality. This isn't scripted reality.

It's a no, it's not a reality show. It's it's a drama. It's Oh, by the way, this is another Oh. She used to be on play School. I remember her from that, which is why it was quite confronting to see her tits Like there's four in lesbian scenes with Nony Hazel from play School, she spends the whole time fucked up, like she's blazed, like getting stoned by the pool making love. Is an old lady lesbian and I was just like, that's that's who I meant to be, not when I'm old.

Now, yeah, I'm ready. The thing is I read an expose a about the truth in nursing homes, the truth about sex and STI the aging population want to remain active. The highest rate of STIs in Australia above teens and youth is in retirement homes. Really, they're all rood in each other silly, Wow, Why would they not? You know, their life partners have probably deceased or in a vegitative state. Yes,

That's wild. Yeah, yeah, I feel like nursing homes they're a bit they're a bit different to retirement villages. Like, I don't want to glorify nursing homes too much because I've heard some I remember seeing some like seven thirty report about like nursing staff who are like a bit too rough and like the old people get bruised and TTV. Yeah, stuff like that. And one of my friends worked in a nursing home and she couldn't do it anymore because

Also, shout out to HK workers. That's a tough gig, especially the dementia ward. I mean, I've been in there, and oh my god, it's hard to shout out.

You do an incredible job, which actually further emphasizes my argument. Why not make your life easier as an aged care worker by opening it up to young people.

Yeah, and you could entertain them. You could put on little shows. You could teach you how to TikTok. You'd have to pretend you're straight, but they probably think you're a woman. To be honest, I could teach some could teach bars, and I could do clowning exercises with them. Should we call one?

I was hoping you would.

Should we call I could call on as top Wiggans.

And see if he hasn't actually made an appearance in season three of this podcast.

You're able to.

No, don't do this, she's here. I hate it when you do this part the alter ego. I prefer it when you just make the call and become.

Dot that she's tripped over. I'll go get her.

When he pretends she's in the room and they're different people, just own it. It's you. Why are you tapping?

That was her walking? Come to the microphone? Here's this one. There's bedroom smells. I know the bedpan underneath. Hello, Hi dos, how are you? Poor boy? This boy's right? Is a boy? How are you dear?

I'm good? I was just can you can you call a retirement village and find out? Actually, I think first and foremost you should find out do you need to be able to live there?

Like?

Can I apply? Is there an age limit? And then also like what facilities do they have? And what I'm signing up for? What do they have a pool? They have a mezzanine bar?

Yeah, I've just found a number for one.

Jenna, are you showing initiative? I don't even ask you to google that. Well, I'm very interested in this, and I want to not I.

Thought you were a statue, didn't talking?

Maybe if Jenna and I pretend we're an elderly couple, we can moving together.

With that voice that throws off understand call it? Call it.

Like, can't?

This is Teresa, good afternoon, Trenath. The MANA is dot Wiggans. How are you sorry? Dot Wiggans? A d o t Wiggans.

I've got I got I got it, Dot Sorry, I just didn't get it first time around.

No, no, no issue. A very good fairyfusing name. Sometimes people they do. Some of the people say Diana, and I'd love to be Diana.

She was beautiful.

But I'll bet I have a few questions in regards to the facility.

How can I help you?

Do you have a pool?

We had two pool oh.

My, you know you used to be good friends with Dawn Fraser bless her soul in the swimmer and I used to swim with her. And I think I have never had a pool in my whole life. So that that checks off on the list in regards to we have.

An indoor pool and we have an outdoor pool.

You had me at indoor and how exciting is there a drinking bar for drink?

How could we have a resort without having a drinking bar?

This is going very well. Maybe a sport equipment or I've heard of zoom zoombra or zoom zoomba, or a gym facility.

Yeah, so we have we have a we have a fully equipped gym. We have we have an aerobic room where they do yoga and I think it's pilarates or like like a pilarates kind of flash aerobic aerobic. We have water aerobic in the indoor poll. So at the moment, our bar every Friday night hour, yes, every second Friday night. We have a dinner night or a meal night, however you like to call that.

If you ask me.

What they what they? What the current caterer does is on dinner night, she does a full menu, and then on the non and on the non dinner night she will do a takeaway menu. Oh my goodness, me a lot of people buy a couple of those takeaway meals and freeze them for the way.

Oh dear, that sounds absolutely lush. Well, I appreciate, I appreciate all the facts. This is great to know, Andy very who Sorry, sorry, my cat has just coming in the room.

But we have lots of other lots and lots and lots and lots of other activities throughout the week. There's card planes, there's table tennis, there's craft sessions. They do boring lessons. My dear, my name's Teresa dot who terresas.

Got it, dear, thank you. I appreciate that question though. What is the age limit for your sort of your grounds?

Yeah, so you need to be forty five years plus and you need to have no children living with you.

Oh dear, I've sort of inquiring. My gay little grandson twenty five years old would have loved to give you his business.

Anyway, forty five and over. Yeah, so you need to be forty five goodness?

Mean, all right, well, you know what, I.

Will come and visits.

I'll come and check it. Out and I'll meet you at that why you're talking about all right, I've got everything I need to know. You've been above and beyond.

Oh, thank you, dear, thank you. Well, if you'd like to come and have a look at the village, let us know. We'll give you a bit of a guided tour and take it from there.

Thank you so much. I appreciate my love.

You're welcome, ard take care, bye bye.

Oh I'm shattered. Oh it would have been my perfect class style. There was bloody pink craft.

Oh she was really selling it.

Aerobic aerobic pilates.

Yeah, two poles, indoor and indoor and outdoor.

It's fine, I'll just continue to rotten in my apartment. Is it just me?

A podcast by a couple of mitches?

All right? Now, I want to throw it back to our last episode of season two last year. This was the episode with Jenna in the coffin and fun fact that has gone on to become our most listened to episode ever. So obviously that episode was going to get a look in when it comes to the best bits. This was the first time we kicked off our brand

Yeah, you do say that quite often.

So Jenny and I have found a bunch of TikTok challenges that we want you to attempt to give you some inspiration. See if you can perhaps make this a hobby of yours. Jenny's in a coffin right now.

Can you knock on the wall or something that's an audio medium? People just think you're in a plastic bag.

Yes, we we granted her her wish. She wanted to do a show from a coffin, so we made it happen. I'm gonna have to be the one that actually does these challenges.

That's okay, that's few with them. What's the first one?

I'm excited the first one. I've got three for you today. The first one was started by a chit called Maria McFly where she was talking without opening her mouth, so she was showing off her hidden talents, and I reckon you'll be able to do it too, So take a listen to her attempt.

Here yourself.

There's no child stuck anywhere, right, that's just so.

Her lips never ever open, So it's kind of like, hm, but I can't do it very well. She can really enunciate each word.

I think I can do this.

Go and give it a crack. Do you have to film yourself? That's the idea?

Oh shit on TikTok?

Now just fill it on your normal phone, all right?

And do I have to do a setup?

Hey?

Everyone, No, it's not a radio show. No, you just start.

Okay, wait, started to film? Okay, here we go.

Beddy Daddy, I'm take it alone that I can't get all got brilliant.

Do it again, but turn your mic up a bit louder.

Okay, Ernie Daddy, I'm taken alutle that I can't Oh my god, wow, Seashell Sea shall buy the Sea Cell.

Holy shit, that is one of the weirdes things I've ever witnessed. Oh sorry, what else.

Is it? You can't do peace? I need a sentence without any plosives, to be honest.

That's what I thought Jenna was going to sound like in the coffin. But the acoustics are quite good. That's what we spec Okay, So why don't you say it's something we've noticed, it's something we hate or appreciate.

It's something something.

It's terrifying.

I sound like a Disney cartoon dog.

Like your your neck fat definitely does a bit of a ribbit sort of thing when you have to do.

I don't like the air coming through. Wonder if I can.

Block your nose?

Oh my god, wow, like an animated dog.

Do you know what it sounds like. It sounds like I'm standing, I'm lining up out the front of a nightclub and I can hear the muffled music inside.

Oh yeah, okay, sing something that's good.

Terrified? Wow? All right, you succeeded with that one.

Well I will be a viral star. I'll send you that video. Can you send to the Arctic? You can get me the cash isn't how it works. You just text it to him and go.

You have a good track record of making it viral. So let's baby step enough. This next one is a cake cutting hack that's gone viral. So instead of cutting it into slices, people just scoop up a piece of cake with a wine glass.

How so do you mean this is a good one.

So the cake just gets left with this round portion cut out of it, kind of like a cookie cutter. Oh so rather than slicing it, yeah, you just kind of scoop it up, and.

Then I guess you can sort of just give everyone their own cups and they eat it out of a cup. Correct.

So I'm gonna have to polish off these wines of mine and Jenners because we need empty cups.

Have you finish your almost there?

So I'm going to be so drunk.

Yeah we have. Oh, he's just down to it. Oh, dear Dyln, Oh, you'll be in the body coffin before we know it. We have audio right for this with this challenge.

Oh, this one's very visual. So fat couple of miches where you can find them. You're going to film the whole thing. Make sure you film on your phone in one hand yep, because that's how all the other videos look. All right, here's your cake, so.

It's just a classic wall Is no coals, coals mud cakes.

I'm gonna give you.

Jenna's c you can do you want to film, I'm going to peel off the paper, the brown paper here. Canna give us an update? How you doing in there? No, go on, wood? Is it?

Is it getting hot and stuffy in there?

Oh?

You know it's okay?

Is it padded? Jenna?

Can?

Are you leaning on a side or are your arms crossed like your corpse?

No?

There they were crossed, but now they're just down by my side. But it's got a nice pillows. Make sure you don't dig the chipped glass into the cake. I don't want shards or through the cake.

All Right, you film there so I don't need to go.

There's no fetter.

I'm not even joking. I'm wired to do it, all right. So I'm gonna I've got the cake in front of me everyone, I've got one glass and I'm going to shakunkit like that like a cookie cutter. Alright, and I'm gonna do one, two three all right? I get ready TikTok music. Yeah, there's only for the podcast. Is are we ready? Three?

Two?

One? Let's go. Oh it's a bit messy.

I wish I could say.

That's a dirty rim which has been told that before?

Well too, I'm very responsible. It's kind of working.

Well, there's a bit of rose on this mud.

Okay, Well, if we had more than wow and so they say that that's the perfect portion. Really, yeah, that's what all the videos are saying. And to be honest, I think they're right.

Did a fat person say that? Wow? I think that's a success.

Yeah, if only we had more cups because he meant to do it until the cake's finished.

I can eat it really quickly if I want this big one, Jenna on some cake in your coffin. It is this show.

It's screwed, shut unscrew it. So that one was another success.

That was my favorite.

Okay, So the last TikTok challenge I want to get you to do. It's called Hey quick Question. It was started by a guy called Stephen Glandsberg.

Thanks Steven.

His TikTok name is hypocritical Amus. Oh yeah, let's not dwell on that. How it worked is you call someone and you basically just keep fumbling on your words and never get to the point. You just keep going and then see how long it takes the person on the phone to crack take a listen.

Okay, here we go, Hey quick question. Yep.

Hey, so I was thinking with with you know, we're kind of looking at you know, with you know, if you remember dating back a couple. You know, with a couple, there's there was at one point at least and you know, I've never really there was at least, you know, I've never there's I guess when I when I really sit down and think about it, and you know, with you know, Easter everything, there's there's no I've never.

Oh, this is just meant for me, isn't it? Just Yeah?

So back in episode fifty one, you might recall that you called mine and Jenna's boss, no, the head of the digital department, And so I'm thinking, just to make it even, you call the big boss dB, the.

Head of No, I'm not doing that.

Yes you are, Oh hello, I'm the one that said, don't you dare call my boss Kieran, that's inappropriate. And now here we are in the same scenario and you're going no, yeah, but.

This is a big boss of the radio station. And I couldn't. I'm too nervous, not anyone but him.

I knew he would stumble at the last hurdle, Jenna, anyone I would have such a great succession rate in TikTok school.

But now, but he's going to know it's coming off your phone. I'll turn the call idea, but then he went, well, hey, it's me.

He's the boss. He has to answer you go dB, the big boss of Kiss. I'd rather you do it off your phone though, so he knows it's you calling shit.

Where is it?

How do you get over here?

You filmed with that?

Oh my god, your phone is so disgusting. It's a greasy fingerprints all over us.

Because I was perspiring at the funeral, very anxious. Oh dearing me. I don't think I can.

Yes, you can.

I believe in you, me too.

This is this is a lot shit.

I've never seen Mitch this nervous before.

He's my boss. He's given me the radio show.

He's not going to take it off you.

Yeah, I imagine that.

He's literally he's Kyle and Jackie Oh's boss. He understands it. Sometimes you have to fuck around a bit to make good content.

Mitch, you made a viral video, mate, you're fired.

Imagine let's ring. So this is the Hay Quick Question Challenge started by Hypocritical on TikTok.

He we are on Speak and I got to start with hey quick question, Yes, hey, quick question. I'm just wondering if you have been across the with a quick turnaround that we were given the time frame between well I don't know if Kathy's told you or not, but between the left and the right, and I don't know how to say it, but no one really knows where to go left or right or And if you are okay with everything that happened at Branch on Friday, I'm okay to sort of make it confirmed to go ahead

Just yeah, I'll look forward to reading it.

Let's put it in writing so then I could sign off on it. Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, of course, just like you signed off on it. Was it was last month. I think the sign off happened for the original file, which I don't believe I got a hold of, which sort of came to Susie then to me and it bounced around for a bit, similar to what happened in Europe back in O seven. But yeah, I'm all good. If you're all good.

Yeah, I'm not good man. I won't comment.

I'm filming a TikTok I got. Yeah, you're in the pool, aren't you. Now you call your boss and that your ramble and you don't actually get to the point. It's meant to be very funny. This will go viral whatever, All right, bye, deeps Boke.

Thanks dB.

Wow he was fine.

I told you. He figured out what was going on. He's like, this is content. He started rolling with it.

How was the rambling? Was it all right? Did I pass?

It made zero sense? Which is exactly what way?

Oh? I love TikTok school. He nailed it. When's lunch?

All right? If you guys want to send us any TikTok challenges you want Mitch to do in the new year at couple of mitches on TikTok. That's actually tigers than anything you reckon Mitch should attempt.

That was fine, Just move, don't forget to subscribe and leave a review on your podcast app or follow on the Spotify.

All right, I wanted to finish up this Best Bits episode with a mispronunciation. You guys know that that's kind of our thing. We love taking the piss out of a mispronunciation, and Mitch Cherry brought this one to the table.

This is said by the Prime Minister of the United Kingdom, Boris Johnson, who's very Republican and we do not like him. Doesn't like our type anyway.

What do you mean our type? Mitchell handsome?

He was on radio in the UK, funnily enough, when this conversation about food came up and the host asked him if you'd tried any vegan foods. That's when this blunder happened. I've also eaten vegan sausage rolls. Are you have you eaten?

Not?

But it's meant to be a monster hit for that bag chairs Vegan began Vegan.

He sounded a repulse. He's like, I have tried begain roll.

He had to take a pause in the middle of it. Vegan, vegan. He announces it like that, no idea, And I haven't strongly about something since I saw that interview with Harry and Me again, No, I haven't, honestly haven't.

I was just used and I was like, so, who are you voting for in the federal election.

I didn't even think about what. I'm a good one. Not. No, he is terrible.

Yeah, you can't vote him in again? Okay, no, I can. No. You know what my guilty pleasure is. You get two bits of bread, you butter it, m hm. You put some tomato, sawce you love that, and then you slap some devan devan and tomato. I thought sandwiches.

Couldn't agree more. I can't get that to my grandmother because she when she eats sandwiches, you know, because she's getting up there, she tends to choke on her food, you know, and which is awful. And it's such an awful thing to be in the room if someone who's choking. I don't give to my nand because then she chokes and she'll have dying and then you know she wind up in heaven. That was a great story. Thank you so much.

That's a great story.

Jenna grandmother choked today.

My grandmother, great storyteller.

Thank you, thank you. I've been told that before, not old.

Honestly, I don't know what we were thinking the day that we decided to invite Jenna bent Sand to the team.

Ha ha.

As soon as you suggested, I said, that will have a no question, We'll take it.

Good.

Can you actually, Jenna? I think Jenna's very hard to impersonate, But why don't you give give a go at your best Jenner impression?

I don't know what's what's the common Jenna expression.

I don't know a lot of aggression often oftentimes often comes with a weapon. We're really going on, that's going on to eleven minutes. We really should I was.

About to say a lot that was funny, trying to think of a way to weave it into a sentence. So I's going to say I was really really thrown. When they move Neighbors from channel ten to eleven, I had to retune my.

Set top box. I agree. You know, I'm worried about COVID. I know what it's going to do. To people in the economy. Yeah, my uncle thinks we're heading into a recession.

Your uncle sounds like a bit of a carrying.

Lesbians. God, one more time, just to get the jo I'm also eaten sausage rolls. Not that it's meant to be a monster hit for that chair, So stupid, Mitchell's your Sorry, we really need to move on. But hell, here's your depression.

Oh that's a fucking loaded question, she said, A load in question? What an expression? All right, guys, there's a couple of bits of bullshit from the show. We'll be back next Monday with another brand new episode, and let me just say, we've got a lot of things to catch up on from the Easter break.

I can't wait.

But in the meantime, we'll be chatting away in our Facebook group like always. That's called Enduring Idiots, So make sure you join the group if you haven't already, and we'll catch you back on the podcast next week. For babe, is it just me?

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