#238: SMUT!

Just hoo, stood by a couple of mitches.

Hello, Yeah, you release yourself for the rude shocks of young adults.

You know.

I saw aid A Nicodemo in the Westfield the other day when it was Thursday. No, when did I ask?

No?

Mitch, Julie and Mitchell coos hello you Illo you.

Oh, she doesn't feel the same, knowing that we we're terminal terminal terminal.

Yes. We announced in the anniversary episode on Monday that we're wrapping the podcast at the end of the year.

We're done.

And here's the awkward thing. We did a double record, so we are currently speaking to you immediately after we recorded that episode, and so we've had a real way to gauge the reaction because we're talking right now before the announcement episode goes out. I don't know if people are sad or thrilled.

Yeah, I think it'll be mostly sad. There'll be a few people that are thrilled.

They're like, oh God, they had their time. Yeah they used to be good.

Four years too late. But yeah, we're here. So we don't have any any messages or simple let's.

Just assume everyone was lovely. Thank you for your heart. Oh God, that's what you.

Said was and the ruses that I turned up at.

My norm Wargers price.

Jenna is here, of course, hasn't movement, and I went to the lou Jenna's just like you just work like a machine.

Yeah, the two of you are so low maintenance. Because when we stopped down between episodes, I was like, I've got to do a piss. Yeah, I've got to make a coffee. I've got to have some water or another one. And I'm like, do you guys want anything water?

Nap.

I was like, what the fuck? You just have no need.

I'm just very chill. I was just sitting. I didn't even move And then when you were to the toilet general I didn't even talk to each other.

Oh that is so awkward. Am I the glue?

I didn't even realize I did, but didn't do anything.

What's worse, I say, you were like, we're not talking. This is so awkward.

No, I just I thought to mysel Oh God, we're sitting here in silence. But I think that's the side of a good friendship when you don't have to talk. I agree with very good. So, yes, we're sitting here after just announcing the death of the show. My music box is there, the half drunk champagne is there, the sadness is there. Definitely. Yeah, well change the subject. The weirdest thing happened to me today on my way here

Oh no, you ordered first.

Yeah, and I went, oh, no, I'm getting them, and she went, here, but you had the chicken roll and I've been waiting here to get just those roles, and I went, oh no, sorry, I was always getting them. And the poor woman making my role was like, oh, we know me. She's allergic to avocado. He has to have these. And she went, oh are you ALLERGEI to have avocado and walked off.

Oh she's rude. Yeah, you're not in the wrong, Like tough tits lady. I understand her frustration. She was probably looking forward to those fucking little.

What weather rice paper.

Yeah, she's looking forward to them. She could have allergies for all we know. But yeah, don't take it out on you. No.

No, But isn't it funny the hide on some people to think, well, no, I was getting those, like you're not first in line. Those deeps is real.

She's like, I'm hungry, chicken, let it bite. I thought, what a little bit.

And then to go, oh, you alloged to have.

Ca you're on rations, you're only allowed.

I know.

It was so weird. I felt guilty, but I was in the front of the line.

See that is another one of those random acts of kindness, pay it forward opportunities that you stared in the face and said, no, I'm not going to do it.

Oh what you expect me to say? Yes, you can have them.

I don't expect that. But that would have been a beautiful letting to the story if you'd have been like, oh, honey, I don't want you to be hungry.

Here go.

No, she was rude, Yeah that's true. If it was like she deserved it, different story. But yeah, you're right.

If she was an old, dittary woman, who what don't.

She look like? Not that it matters, but it matters.

She had a lot of work done, full of filler and bright blonde hair.

Maps you want to be Yep, I don't.

Know how you would have eaten them with those lips, Nancy, how rude. Anyway, it rattled me, put me in a mood. But I'm out of it now because I'm here with you too. Anyway. Welcome. Everybody is just me. Every show we start the same way. Something we've noticed, something we hate or appreciate. Mitch doesn't know mind, I don't know mitches.

So my gym kind of ties into the fact that we're too old to be hosting a podcast about the rude shocks of young adulthood because there's something that I'm now guilty of that makes me officially old.

Oh no, Mitchell, and.

I expected this to happen much later in life. I've got to tell you.

Really, Okay, Well, mine's basic. Should we just jump in with mine too? I'm very straightforward? Or here we go, hit me, Bradley, go for it? Is it just me? Is this message that I received from Facebook Marketplace an absolute slap in the fucking face? So, as you know, I'm a reformed Facebook Marketplace attic.

What do you mean reformed?

Well, I were good. I've been working on getting my reviews up to five star because, as we've discussed, there were two.

Ah, I forgot about that God and with that based largely on your rudeness, but.

Not like you're a bitch give me this, Smeg Kettle. It was like I just wouldn't respond. I was a harsh, negotiated sella as this well, just my overall rating, So I honestly think a bit of column A, bit of column B.

How do you check that? Because I didn't know that I had a rating because I've been Facebook marketplacing my flaps off.

So yes, if you got a Facebook, then if you hit Marketplace and hit the little profile like on the top right, then gives your marketplace profile. You hit view my Marketplace profile. Let me see what I'm up to. I've got. Oh see, I've gone up to now three and a half stars. Oh that's not bad.

If I really wanted your item and I was buying something from you, I would see the three and a half stars and be like, nah, roll the dice, Yes, how bad could it be?

Look at this? Nakata says, my seller strength a punctuality, communication, and pricing. And then Nathan Pong says, my seller's weaknesses is pricing.

So this is her rating about you. Yeah, and so what did she sayd My weaknesses were punctuality.

My weakness is a communication.

We knew that. The punctuality. James says, my weakness is with an item description.

Go fuck yourself?

What would the item? I don't know.

I can't click at It's just they're just old reviews. Anyway, So I sold look at this a Smeg milk croffit. It was one hundred dollars. Were getting rid of that because For my birthday, my parents got me a Brevl espresso machine, a coffee machine. Oh that's harder than the pod thing, I know, but I love it, like, I really love I used to have an espresso machine when I lived at home, and then the divorce I lost it and it was it was dreadful. So I've always

Don't you find that more fiddly?

No, but I like, I'm a bit like I like to understand, yeah, and I like to find my Yeah. I like the taste of espresso. Coffee is one of my favorite things in the world. So I really just offered.

You one and you were like, nah, I.

Can't have too. If I've won this late in the day, I want to sleep.

Oh God, we're getting old.

I know.

I like it now, all right? So here it is. I sell this the milk proffer. Everyone's selling it for one hundred and forty, so I think I'll do one hundred because I want a quick sale easier self. I've had Hi, is this available? Sure? Is has a lid? Yep?

Sorry? Side note? Is it just me on the fly? Why do they ask if it's available? I know, yeah, the ads there, I know, I know. She goes, can I make it eighty? I can pick it up now. I said, this is price to sell at one hundred. It's the cheapest online I've price checked. Plus I've got a lot of interest. That's so agross.

I had no interest.

That's so agros.

She says, okay, a dress please. But it worked. So she comes in ten minutes. I'm here coming perfect. I go to the door. She's there. My dog Hamish parents house, runs out and she goes, oh d I'm to grab him. I'm like, just come inside and Hamish Hamish comes inside. So I shut the front door, so she's now inside.

The more I hear about Hamish, I think he's such a bother.

He's not a bother. He's fourteen years old. He kind of like literally walked out and wanted to go and do a Wii out the front.

You didn't let him, and because he'll run down the street.

The whole thing.

What a bother.

So she ended up coming in a house with Hamish with me shut the door. So we have like three minutes. I'm like, do you need anything? You all good? She went, no, Oh, get going, I've got I got to go to work when cool. She gave me the one hundred dollars cash. Then she left. Ten minutes later, I get.

This message, a message and a review, A message. Yeah, thank you.

Very much for the proffer. By the way, I'm a house cleaner. If someday you need your house professionally cleaned, you're welcome.

Ha What fuck?

I invite Nikandana into my house and she says, pig pen she goes. Ten minutes after leaving, she thought, you know what I'm going to message she had to disinfect is vile.

But my favorite thing is is it wasn't like I'll send you my raids.

It was basically, oh, come like she's on domestic Blitz and she's Shelly Kraft and she's coming down on his luck. This poor boy that's her good.

Deed for the day was so rude. On the other hand, I'm like, you got a hustle, baby, she's promoting her business.

Maybe she listened to the podcast and she got a hustle. Props to us and the cand and her cleaning services in Sydney. If you need a good cleaner, that is also a bit of a bitch.

Okay, hang on, this doesn't count as Facebook marketplace. But I had an interaction recently that some of my friends thought was so weird, but I was so fine with it. What happened so someone posted in the Facebook group for my building saying does anyone have any empty candle jars? And I had a bunch of candles with this much left, so I was like, I'll burn through. They're yours. And then as like a thank you, he filled one of my jars and brought it over and said, here you go,

Oh yeah, yes, attractive pull okay if you like him, poor feet.

I came back upstairs and roving reporter Oscar happened to be here. I said, that was so nice. This guy told me that he just discovered me and he loves the videos whatever. And he goes, give me a look, give me a look. I want to see his Facebook page.

Oh I love this. Yeah.

And so, because we'd been messaging on Facebook about the Jars, the candle Jars, Jars, Yeah, I had his Facebook profile. So I showed Oscar and he goes, he's a liar. He said, what do you mean? And he goes, I've spoken to him on grinder, Oh, while I've been at your house. And this was going back six months, and he said, aren't you Mitchell Kombs's friend?

Oh my god, the handle.

He didn't just discover you. He's a fucking liar.

Wow.

And I said, do you know what, I'm still fine with that because I would make up a lie for fear of seeming creepy. Like, by the way, I know who you are now, I know where you live. He was like, I've only discovered you, like he was trying to play it cool. That's fine. I would do the same thing.

Yeah, I don't think it's a white lie in order to keep things kind of nice.

Non gave me a candle, and also he didn't come upstairs. He insisted, he goes, I'll meet you in your lobby because like privacy, you don't want to know where you live. And I was like, now I get it, and so it was just very pleasant, very lovely. I'm burning the candle right now. Is it not fucking candle in the guest bathroom. Yes, it's a beautiful blood into grape food.

I saw a red flashing light in the middle of that candle when I was doing a piece. Oh my god, is honest.

Yes, when you're on the toilet, shit, it's.

Like pool everywhere on the pool cleaner. Is it just me the rude shocks of young adults food? Now, if I could please take a moment, if I may on my own podcast, Yes, it is terminal. We've looked at all the treatment options. Nothing can fix it.

We haven't got long lived, we don't know.

And we spoke to Charlie Tayo and he can't do it. And you know it's bad when even Charlie can't fucking fix things. He's like, you guys are beyond repair. You know what you can do to help me out is you can go and purchase some I'm with Idiot merchandise. It is still available. Speaking of my good friend, I think you're friends of them too, price keeper what's his name.

For evering reporter Oscar for.

He is beautiful. I love him, but I have to destroy him. So we are still competing at merchandise and you can buy mine. My I'm with Idiot range available now on couple of mitches, dot com, dot ahu.

So just to recap, we were having a bit of a competition who could sell more merch because we were all responsible for a design. Part from Jenna. We're all responsible for a design I won by landslide. It's for applause. Oh fuck you. I'm sitting on my hands anyway, and you and Oscar came tired second. If I'm with Idiots, your design versus Chicken his design, And so now we're down to a tiebreaker. But it's just a bit unfair

He's a huge audience. I've got a huge misfits.

Audience, and I do not try and create a divide between me and Oscar. There is not one. I love Oscar.

HET's got a huge audience and you've got a huge attitude problem.

Clearly I'm with idiot is available, and now you know that the podcast is over by it because let me tell you that domain, we're not going to keep paying for it when this shows going.

Honestly, when we're gone, the merchant's gone with it.

Amen. So a couple of mitches dot com dot you genuinely, I would would mean the world if you could please buy some teas. And there is one shirt that I will personally kiss. That's all I'm gonna say.

Okay, it's one.

I might even used one as a com rag and you might get oh sorry, I'm just saying I get muss. But that's what you should say anytime I'm disgusting, because it really affects me that words smart. Yeah, there's something about it.

It's like an electric dog collar. When I said the words smart, you're like, it makes me.

Feel like a cat that's had its nose rubbed in piss smart. That's how I feel.

You should just say smart smat all right, I will. That's the new strategy going forward.

That on merch smartt but I will come on a shirt and wonder smat.

And by the way, the brand new merch only just released Jennet's Rash Bevy that is now for sale limited run, getting before they sell out. And also our collection of mugs. We've got a brand new one available for this season and you design plus all the old mugs if you want to complete your collection.

Yeah, the final mug is available for sale. No more mugs ever. And you want to have all those mugs on your shelf and your officer in your kitchen? Season two till five? Yeah, six, season six? Yeah, it's fucking anniversary. It is confusing. Yeah, I think funk. We've done more episodes than Friends.

All right, is it time for my agent? Yes, let's go.

Let's do it.

Bradley, Is it just me? Did you think you'd be much older when you started needing a nose hair trimmer?

Oh? My god?

Much older?

Do you have one?

Well? It was like an attachment with my razor.

Yeah.

I didn't think I would ever need that attachment, but my god, I do really quite often.

Mitchell, show me your nose.

I don't think I want to show the nose.

Look up, I can't see.

A thing so hair there at all.

I am you for a trim. But the reason I'm so fucked off is because I remember giving my grandfather for Father's Day and iaran nose hair trimmer. Yes, and so in my mind, I'm like, you have to be fucking old to require one of those. Yeah, it started off every once in a while. By the way, is it just me on the fly? Do you hate having to shave more often the older you get? Yeah, my facial hair like I used to be able to get away with once a week, maybe twice. Now it's every

Do you like to be like fully shaved? Right?

No, it's because I don't have that much facial hair on my face. It's all the neck beard.

Which looks hideous.

Thanks today.

No, we've discussed it before, That's what I We've spoken about your neck beard.

Yes, and so I have to shave every two days. And it used to be like maybe once every couple of weeks. I'd give the nose hair a trumaselica. Sometimes you can feel them protruding outside the nostril. Now it's like once or twice a week. Really, it's that old thing of like, the more you shave it, the quicker it grows back.

I think that's a wive's tale, but it's happened.

My nose hair is out of control.

Oh, Mitchell, this is actually as.

I inhale through my nostrils, I can feel the breeze flowing through my nose hair.

Oh really, yes, can you get it? I want to try it.

I've never trim my nose has in my life. Downstairs, you guys chout among yourself.

Yeah, go for it now, general, I when well left that be.

Funcked to use my nose. It's fine, No, no.

Because it's just I've got to clean up.

Yeah, no, yeah, we are, we are.

We don't have much in common.

No, we don't talk.

We should say the real reason the show.

Then it's Christopher, you and I.

The love is palpable. We're deeply connected. We're in love and it's tearing Mitchell apart.

He's always been jealous.

After I heard you on the Misfits, I thought I need to fit in there. That was discussed.

Smart. Smart, he's back.

Thank you.

So do you need a demonstration first?

I'm assuming you just shove it up and twist sort of. You do yours? Yeah?

Do you really never use fue?

Never? In my whole life? About trim my nose?

That's depressing. I have to use it so often.

What's your ethnicity again?

What Scottish and Welsh? I couldn't be more fucking white.

Okay, I'm gonna get my camera up because I want to see if I've got any.

Oh, trust me, you'd feel it, you know, if they're there.

I don't think I do you go first?

I've just cleaned it.

Okay, Jenny, can you film it just from a single? All right, here we go. Oh, it's like a pen.

Around the circumference of the nostril as well. Oh you can hear that. Yeah, there's some in there. How are you feeling?

Oh?

It's on there?

Is that?

Oh you wait till next time you blow your nose? That we little fucking tiny hairs in there. Wow, nose whiskers.

That's incredible.

Wow.

I don't know if they're Mitch's nose pubes on mine.

I cleaned it. You watched me clean.

Where's the wet one?

Are you not filming him? She's holding the camera, but it's not recording. She's just sitting there holding the camera. She didn't get record.

You're a digital producer's record. I thought you'd turn it on.

I think I actually turned it on, and then you turned it off.

Watch the video? Is there anything?

Two seconds with nothing? I handed to Jenna, and then it stopped. For God's sake, I promised. How did it feel, by the way, the nose hair trimmer as a nose here trimmer, virgin popped your nose cherry?

I did it felt fine. I didn't feel anything at all, Nothing at all.

Jenna, I'll have a try. Okay, do women get nose hair properly like mine? Actually, this is the grossest part sometimes when I forget to nose hair trimmer, like there's one protruding for the nostril that I can just pluck. Wow, fucking ill.

Oh Jesus Christ, your bugger over here.

Jenn's getting quite a bit.

Oh my god, Jenna, it sounds like Kellogg's crunching nut up there.

Sounds like mine syncarator. Yeah, Oh my god, Jenna is full of it. And so I've decided, yes, I'm in need of a nose hair trimmer at the ripe young age of twenty eight. Yeah, as soon as I need an ear hair trimmer. Oh, I'm retiring, all bets are I'm fucking retiring. Yeah, No, it's time to go get the hair out you want to keep it. Next time you blow your nose, you'll see the little whiskers like I said.

Yeah, but hold on, Jennet, a pint your nose. Now, I've got raizor bumps like I can feel sharp hair like I've got Pubrey grass.

Ah. Imagine if you've got an ingrown nose here.

Yeah, I'm just giving my Brazilian to my nostrils young kids.

Then near to this, I.

Think you're still at gorgeous Mitchell. So I don't want to hang about it in the things.

Despite my nose made.

You got something on your mind?

Hit up at a couple of Mitchell's on Instagram to get yourself on the shoe.

How is your turn? Be one of the final few to feature on this podcast. If you feature on the show in the last few episodes, it's almost like you're at our bed as we die, at our big took correct holding a candle in your hand.

Now here's the awkward thing. Like I said before, we did a double recording. Today we recorded the announcement five the anniversary episode where we told everyone that we're finishing at the end of the year.

Correct, so at the.

Time of recording now, it hasn't aired yet, and so the person we're about to speak to doesn't know.

Do we tell it? No, we can't tell them because they be an idiot. They're going to tell everyone else.

Yeah, that's the risk, they'd say in the idiot group chat. They're fucking finishing the podcast.

If they if we can't risk this getting out, this is big news, It.

Is big news. No, I see, I kind of selfishly want to hear the reaction, being.

Like, what, I've got an idea. I've got an idea.

Just leave it with me. Oh god, what are you gonna do? No, we'll tell her are you fucking going rogue?

Now? We'll tell her what But we'll just pretend we joke.

Oh okay, just kidding.

We'll get a real reaction, and again, no, I just got your best of both worlds.

Yeah, yeah, we'll say, how are you feeling after the announcement that we're finishing? Yes, you say it, Okay.

I'll do it. Yeah, okay, okay.

Cool.

By the way, we're talking to her name is Tapa, and that's not a joke. The first name surname?

Where you Pa, Billy?

Not Hi? Is this Tapa?

Yes, it is Hi.

It's Mitch and Jenna. We said your name right, Tapa.

No, it's a show. It's my first name is just a nickname, Laisha.

Where the fuck did the nickname Tapa come from?

It's my surname is Tapa?

That's a nickname?

Yeah? Well no, but I play sports. Apparently it's easier for everyone, you know.

I get you. Well, welcome, Welcome to the show, Tapa.

Where in Australia are you Cambra? I'm in Canberra, the nation's capital. Beautiful, Tapa. Obviously, we want to know how are you after the news that broke you?

Are you handling it okay?

I think I'm going to be all right. Yes, I think I'm going to handle it just fine.

Oh oh, well, that's a bit disappointing. We thought you'd be more emotionally charged knowing that we're ending the podcast.

Yeah.

No, see, I think I'm going to be okay with that because now that I'm kind to steal the show and make my own, That's where I think I'm going to head with that.

Tapa terrified, mate, We're ending the show.

Did you actually I think I don't believe it.

I actually don't believe that joking. We're joking. We thought you'd be upset, but you're clearly not, which really does our hearts good. Have you got a fucking Is it just me?

You know?

I do a Bradley count tappa in. Is it just me.

Barrisa's flirting with me? Or are they just doing their job?

They want to fuck you?

I think I do so, Like where's the line where do I say, here's my number? Or just like take my coffee.

And go, I'm with you. Every every Barisa that's ever made me a coffee is in love with me.

Yeah that's what Well I get girt. It gives me free coffees every now and then. And it's like, are you being kind or do you actually like are you in love with me? Just tell me?

Well that we're dealing with If it's high house, your day, but if it's prolonged eye contacts, well it is.

I mean I go to the same shop every morning, so they know me well, they know how I like my coffee. And then sometimes I go, don't worry, it's on us.

Are you attracted? In return?

I mean, I wouldn't say no, you know, that's.

What everyone wants to hear.

Yeah, but let's do a role play, ready, I'm going to be no, no, no, no, no, I'm you female?

A female bros are you?

Are you queer or no?

Yeah?

I am good, So I'm going to be I'm going to be you and you show us how they act. Okay, okay, right here we go and I'm a real method actor. Next, you're the boris.

Yeah, you have to give me your order.

Well, that was just a coffee sound, so just pretend you're doing that.

I'm lost, You're not.

People are going, Hi, how are you?

Oh?

Well, how are you?

How'd your take going?

I'm good, Thank you. I'm just Toper.

My real name is Alicia Alisha, but it's a nickname.

Yeah.

It's just a game.

So you can write whatever you want on the on the coffee. My day is cool.

Don't I already know your order, so I'll just make that for you extra chocolate, right, yeah.

I love extra chocolate. What did you remember that from last time?

Yeah?

I did, so don't worry. I'll make it just the way you like it. Don't have to make your secrets tape with me with your special mocker.

Why don't you fuck me in the pussy?

Sorry?

Sorry, I'm smart.

Sorry, sorry I'm mad.

Is that that's probably what I have to say, isn't it that? How I'll know?

Yeah, with it's top smart smart. I don't think she doesn't get it.

No, I don't.

She never gets anything I do.

So not getting any of this makes me think that the bruise is not flirting with her at all.

Yeah. And also if that was your impression of the barista's treatment towards you, I don't think that was anything that special.

It's really, I promised. When you shaw it in real life, you know it's real. It's real.

I don't know. I want to believe you, but it sounds like the same interaction I have with my barista, who's a six year old woman, and she's not about to bend me over his ship.

Don't yet someone exactly.

I just don't believe. I'm her young. It's a family business, her fucking Greek husband.

Well you don't know that, you don't. I just think I promise. Maybe I don't like secretly recall the interactions. That's not allowed.

But no, no you can't. But you can report back to us because the barista really can't push it much further than that. So if you make a move, I think it's fine because they can't be seen to be praying on customers. But if you just give her your number, then the balls in her cup, I mean Court.

Mitchell, smart, smart, smuck smart. He doesn't feel good, does it.

It's quite funny tunnel showers over her, Tapa, if you're listening, we are actually finishing the podcast, and your lack of emotion towards that is quite helpful and it's the reason why were poor.

Tappa was trying to improvise with us, and yeah, I know it was also Tapa.

You can message Jenna to get your type back. It's a prize for coming on, of course, and if you want to be one of the final for you to feature on is It just Me? The podcast?

You can text this number, oh till no.

Two zero two till nine beautiful voice beautiful, or you can send us a d M. If you've got no credit at couple of miches on Instagram, it's up to you. It's two ways to get in touch, text or DM.

You can buy credit. Oh, I think there's two ways you can get credit. You can buy it. You can get the app.

Yeah, you can get the docker from the survey. Yeah. Or you can do the self serve check out at the supermarket. You just go in to like a different section other than you go recharge mobile. They'll print it on the dock.

Yeah, of course. I remember my nan used to buy the credit in bulk, but receipts would fade, so the hen she'd just go to a top draw where all were in that fae and she'd be so upset.

You know that I have to buy credit for the IgE and phone that Oscar just sang the number of Jesus cra But it's real nifty to see it on the app. Now, recharge bank, I don't have to get a docket.

You only need two more months of credit.

Yeah. What do we do about the number? What do we do about the neon sign? We should we auction them off for charity. I was thinking that because at this point it's just clutter.

Gee's nice to know you're connected to the podcast.

Stuck up? Where's yours?

In my house?

In a moving box?

It's in a U hole somewhere.

I couldn't find it.

It was stolen. I can't find it. I don't know where it is. Oh my god, maybe my ex got it in the divorce.

What should we do with the neons?

Maybe we smash them? No, we pay good.

Money for though, we want them to be seen.

What if we put them somewhere like we petitioned to clover them all the Lord Mayor of Sydney to put them onnoxes.

What if I put it on the penthouse balcony overlooking the very busy street down.

But then that's promo for a show that doesn't exist.

It does exist now.

Yeah, but then I know where you live.

Oh yeah, I could just be a really passionate fan.

There's only two of these in existence, one in your house and one in my exor sex room.

It's quite ambient lighting.

Is that That's what I mean? Yether and Pink got to do wonders for the skin. Yeah, we'll think on that. We can add that to the engine bucket list. What do we do with all our props?

I want to keep it as a memento, but I'm like, I'm not going to forget that I did the podcast. I don't need something that huge in my home.

Well, with your grandma's mental state, it's going to come for you at some point. So do you want to remember this show or not?

I feel I'll remember keep it. I've got like seventeen shirts or all of our merch.

I have a lot of the shirts too.

Anyway, should we go?

Yeah, thank you for listening, idiots, we love you. Let's keep going. The show is great. Come on.

I imagine I was like, fine, and we just tugged on everyone's fucking heart strings.

Only you'd be like, forget it, let's uncancel. What if we just rebranded and called the show like Hello with Mitchard mitch Hello, are you with Mitchard?

Mitch I don't know about that?

And we just gossip?

But instead of an id gym, what do we bring a Hello you? We have we start the show the same way every episode with a Hello something we've greeted something.

What if we just prank call a random number and say hello you and see how it goes. Let's give it a try. I just made up a number and we're going to get a mood. Hello.

Are you okay? You can do it?

Sure? I'm not a no caller? Id shit?

So now Tambourine has your number? What was it?

Names?

Alicia?

I didn't even text her to say she was sorry Tunnel.

I think she knows.

Hello, Hello you.

Yeap?

How are you God? How's it been?

It's Mitch and Mitchy.

Good is this Paulie? No? Yeah, she's here too, Hello you Hello? Are you all right? That podcast doesn't have legs? Didn't work.

You could have at least hustled while you're at it and be like, if it just me listen, I don't want to give her any reason to know who I was.

Fuck all right, that doesn't have work. The show's still canceled. If we can come up with a better substitute in the next couple of weeks, we'll relaunch.

Anyway, We'll catch you back on Monday. She's calling back.

Hello, are you hello? Hello?

When are you up at?

Who's this?

Who is this is?

Paul?

Oh?

Paul?

I hadn't you born the wrong number?

Bloody hell?

I hate it when that happened.

Sorry comber about that. I was calling cool, what's your name?

My name?

How are you Cory?

No?

Of course, kl are you.

Like saying what are you doing today? I was meant to call my mate Paul. We served in an arm together, but I haven't spoken to him in a while, so I thought, I him a buzz what are you doing? Clause? Really?

Yeah, where that's a long time ago.

I hung up on him that that was the weirdest thing that has happened. A correct, hold on, hold on?

What are you going on?

Have called back?

You just said you served him name and he's done two so he probably wants to catch up with you.

I'm deeply worried.

Guys, you're in too deep. Now it's time to go.

Thanks for listening, everybody.

We'll be back on Monday. Is It Just Me podcast by a couple of miches.

Make sure you've get full on your podcast.

Welcome to add brief our secret segment on the end. This is the part where normally we go rode. That was a bit out of pocket scary.

I think, hello, you has legs where you just keep prank calling someone until they're happy to have a conversation. He's laughing.

Oh, it's almost like instant interview. We could have gotten to no clause.

Correct, that's the point.

Well, we learned that he served in Vietnam.

I thought it was where do you say it was Nam? Oh no, it's your Vietnam. I was like, what the fuck are they talking about?

He just text me a question mark.

We're best for it to send back an exclamation mark.

I'm gonna just send back a photo. No, no, what a sweetheart, he said Clause? Did he?

Yeah, Santa?

What a contract like Santi?

Yeah?

Yeah, like a cat.

Oh god, we should stay on the show every time you enjoy yourself? Is that going to be what happens? We did just stay.

Do you think we should add to the Egen bucket lest a live show? We try to get one done before we end or is that too much? Admin? I can see the stress in your eyes already.

It's just like part of the reason we were wrapping up is because we can barely find time where we're all free to record, let alone do a live show. I know, because knowing us, we'll lock it in, we'll promote it, We'll sell out the venue, no doubt. Say sorry, I've got Auntie Monda's fucking christening or something. I don't know.

Me just pointed to genuine.

He said that, Yeah, I wonder if Clause would come to the live show.

That'd be a great special guest.

He's buzzing back, go you know we should invite Tug Dumley.

Oh my god, from the investigation of Peter Rabbit episode Yes, what are the odds that roving reporter Oscar would stumble upon someone who has a vast amount of experience in improv slam poetry. It was incredible, It was it was. That's one of my favorite moments on the show ever.

I know you've actually I struggled to recall the time that you've laughed that hard.

Yeah, it was.

And I was worried that when we went into that segment, I was like, is this too in? Obviously me and my whole neighborhood Facebook group invested in this Petter Arabbi drama. The episode is called Peter Rabbit if you want to go listen. I was thinking of Mitch and Jen are going to be like, we don't care as much as you, but oh my god, you guys were so swept up in it.

The whole world was shocked by it. Can We talked to Clause and I'm he's probably killed.

He's probably killed.

Yeah, he's I haven't been an.

Hang on when the fuck was nam.

It's a good question, Jenny, is he It was it long ago enough that there's no way he could have been there because he would be dead. No, I'm pretty sure. Na'm was the seventies, the end of the seventies.

And you have been to your nineteen seventy five Yeah, oh yeah.

Didn't. How long did it go?

Yeah?

I went from nineteen fifty four to nineteen seventy five.

Yeah, it was very well and good.

I'm going to grab another Champ's here you go for it. Wow, I am the glue.

So I was reading about Vietnam.

No, it's more so I'm not going to bring up a point when mos co host isn't city.

What if I wrote Vietnam war clause?

Should we do another hollow U test?

Yes?

Oh god? What another voicemail?

Who?

Who is it?

It's just tapping, that's it's polishing.

But that sounded like a threat.

That was Morse code for I'm going to kill Jenna.

I'm actually going to look up Morse code translated. It was Morse code translator or Morse code generator. Yeah, translator translator.

Yeah.

So if I write in I'm going to kill Jenna, do give me back what it is in Morse code? It should Okay, this is a bit dark, but were we here?

Now we go.

Hmmm, fuck, how could anyone keep up with that?

So what do you want me to do? Do you want me to play that back?

Play?

Play the Morse code back and see what he says.

No, I'm not involving clause in this anymore. I was just curious, what is I'm going to kill Jenna in Morse code soundline?

And that was it?

Yeah, that's ridiculous, a bit wordy, isn't it.

Do you know the guy the man who decoded the Nazi Morse code the Nazi system.

Was a puff Oh good for him.

He was gay and I think he was killed and he's on the British five dollars power because he loved a pan That's what they did. Tom, I don't know about that. Williams Standing or something was his name.

Jennie Google.

Justle I'm not sure, trust me. No, Jennet, google gay Nazi code and I'm telling you it'll come up.

Alan Turing, that's him, your cousin, Alan Chury. He's just the past tense, churry, cheering, churro present tense. I'm cheering. Yeah, No, you're not right, You're know he's not wrong, he's cheer right, cheer wrong, Alan cheering, Yeah, How was he killed?

I think it was quite It was quite awful.

Why are we talking about because he's a queer man thirty nine?

He met Arnold Murray, a nineteen year old unemployed man.

They had a relationship and that's.

What killed him.

Deare okay, here we go. His housekeeper found him dead. Oh no, he died from cyanide poisoning.

Oh he was killed. What's that sinoid's poison?

Yeah? But how does that happen?

What about this?

When his body was discovered, an apple lay half eaten beside his bed.

Wow, he was poison with an apple?

Yeah, you're kidding.

That's pretty crazy, isn't it. Yeah, because he was a genius.

And he was gays can be true at once. Yeah, you're right, I'm alive. I mean, look at us. Don't let that apple next to your bed, Mitch. I'll add to the engine bucket.

Least we should all do the apple dance before we go.

No.

Thanks. I don't even know what it is. I've just heard people refer to it is. It's some Charlie XX shit. Yeah, Braten, right, Brett, yeah, right right.

The album is growing on me.

You almost sound ashamed to admit it. You've been so steadfast, you're not listening.

I think the apple's rotten. Right to the cool, right.

To the cool? Do you wrote?

Do you.

What's going on?

Well, we've quit, so we know if we don't have to say anything. He's in hypothetical for you, say, for example, we go viral from something that surely I've said, What happens if we get ten million views on this podcast, listens on this podcast.

What happens?

What do we stay on or do we leave it?

What is a bit drastic?

What if a carnival cruise line go we want to sponsor you.

For a decade, we have to continue.

I want to go on a cruise.

I don't. I don't know. What would happen in that situation?

Oh, we'll have to work because you could.

Also view that as going out with a bang.

Yes, yes, yes, yes.

Then what if we fucking stay on because we're like, wow, we've had one ten million view video and then everything thereafter is just like two hundred that's just embarrassing, that's true. We're like, the public have spoken it, you must stay and then they're like, no, it was this one good video. Everything else after that is dog shit.

Yeah, It's hard, isn't it?

Yeah?

All right, sorry, I'm like an x in the middle of a breakup. But but what if we went to the the be What if I.

Did let you peg me smart Smart? What the Xbox? Yeah, you're like a child.

It's real, baby, I thought it was all fake.

Now I've downloaded Crash Bandicoot. Turns out it's a lot harder than I remember.

Yeah, it's tough.

I'm like, I was really good at this as a kid. Why am I fucking it up as an adult?

Ton you know one other games you have? Someone messaged this and said, Hi, Mitch's and girl, I think you would love Goat Simulator three.

Oh no, what are you know that one's it's got a very short shelf life in terms of like ten minutes to your a goat. Yeah, and it's like head butt people and knockshit over cause a bit of carnage. It gets very boring quickly.

How did Goat Simulator get so popular? It got a third iteration?

Do you know what game actually fucks? Because I can't remember off the top of my head all of the games I've got. I've had to buy one of the external hard drives to fit more. Yeah, that's a sign. It's like a Disney Pixar one called Rush.

Oh.

You're at Disneyland and you can go to the different exhibits. It's like the Finding Dory one, Toy Thory one, the Cars one, the Up one, the Incredibles one, and each one has its own little games.

Right.

It's multiplayer, which is good. It is like Race as Fish, the Cars E Races Cars, the Incredible is You races Superheroes. It's kind of the same game, different characters, but it's really good. And Sewan regons that I played kids games. I disagree. I fucking slate that Toy Story game.

Yeah, I made a really bad mistake. Well, hit a man with my car seat and he I'm joking, what joking? I wanted to play a Tiny Townscaper. Tin Escaper. It's this game where you can build castles. It's a whole thing and it's big on TikTok and they said you need to download Steam to play it. Steam's like a program where you can play heaps of games, and okay, so I downloaded Steam for free, created a fucking account on what the PlayStation on my MacBook on my computer.

Ah, you bet your ass that I went on the fucking Microsoft website to Sweden asked for a refund on my VIP roadblocks. Did you not playing it on the Xbox ever? Again? Again, it's a laptop job. Did you get a riffed it's pinning You.

Made the mistake?

Well, no, because I bought the VIP thinking that would make the gameplay experience somehow better. But it's literally a computer game on an Xbox. It's impossible. You can't just use the mouse and click X. You have to finger that fucking arrow button on the bloody Xbox controller for days. And in all this and all that time, everyone else is already dressed and I haven't even put skin one because it's ten times slower on the Xbox dressed.

To impress this, it's given me severe anxiety. I have to put eyelashes on en nails and shoes. Yeah, it's hard.

I did come second in one of them. I was pretty proud of that.

You have a photo of it, because I came first.

I don't even know what this is, so Jenna. It's literally like you play live in real time with other people, correct, and you're given a theme. One of them was like just broke up. And then you're in like a closet and you dress up to that theme and then there's a runway at the end and everyone playing rates what the outfits look like, and like out of five, I.

See you're playing against real people.

Real people, and there's a lot of like dirty play in the fucking dress to impressed community. Some people like band together and vote five stars even though it's putrid.

The Yeah, and do you realize there's a chat?

Yeah?

I didn't realize that until I use the laptop version. The Xbox doesn't even have a fucking chat.

Yeah, what do people chat about?

If the themes Beooty and the Beast, they'll be like I am Bail, I am beast.

Yeah sligh if you have to explain the concepts? Yeah, well we what do we land on?

We hope this podcast for two?

Are we sticking with sticking with Why don't we just.

Try to two point five and if it doesn't feel right.

We did try two point five?

Yeah, so like two point five is sticking with tradition, Like we up the percentage every birthday we have correct but two percent just rolls off the tongue because that's been what we said for a long time.

But let's practice two point five.

We hope this podcast makes you feel at least two point five percent better today. That's all, so we do.

I like it because it feels different. And now we're in our terminal season, we can stage four. Stage four. Of course we've tried holistic Mitch and I went to therapy. We didn't want.

You were saying, so we do. Okay, we'll leave it up to the idiots. Yeah, we hope this podcast makes you feel at least two percent better today. That's all. Just two percent, so we do, So we do? Which one do we do? Two point five or two?

Up to you now, don't forget. I'm with idiot still available, Go and purchase while you can. That'll be a rally girl soon because I'm about to blow.

Up and get a fucking rash shirt and your whole mud collection. Yeah, thank you.

For listening, idiots. We love you so much and we will see you all very soon in a couple of days.

Bye up see yah bye. Is It Just Me?

Podcast by a couple of mechas.

Make sure you've hit follow on your podcast app.