#221: Koala Cake

This is.

Just bostood by a couple of mitches. Hello, you delease yourself for the rude shocks of young adulthood. How dare you leak our company secrets? That's like the newest hiary at KFC walking out with a megaphone and going a Reghana sta. He is Mitch, Julie and Mitchell coos.

I like you. I like you.

Oh now, we're not going to stop down on it. I stop down on what that happy birthday?

Thank you?

You don't get to because that's just why, because it's too much. You got the flowers last week. I think it's a lot.

Flowers aren't a present bread, they were a garnish.

Oh god, here it is.

Jenna gets what I'm saying.

Give you no happy birthday? You know we have to celebrate it again.

Yeah, but at the time of record, it is my actual birthday today, so I'm milking it. I'm milking it. Yeah.

Yeah, happy birthday twenty eight.

I know, which means it's been ten years since my eighteenth my first alcoholic drink, and certainly not the last name.

I know that. You always say that a birthday isn't a birthday without a cake.

I've always said that.

Have you ever fucking said I've known you for a decade and it's.

So gorgeous the Jenna, remember that I've said.

That any things you paid for it kidio, are youre welcome.

I don't have access to the kiddio and I never have, so I used my own money both.

Oh well, thank you, Jenna. Oh look at that.

I found it online and I text Jenna and I said he would love this.

Got involved in all was I mean, since we're being honest, Mitchell, you're making a big deal about having given me flowers. But then he texted me and asked me to reimburse him from the kineo. I had to transfer him from my presence and.

Then I said it reimbursed me it was eighty five, and then I checked the receipt it was actually seventy nine. I've actually made money.

He's made money off my perpose.

Well, you don't have to reimburse me for this.

It's a coals kwan because it's from fucking Coal's Jenner.

No, I'm surprised for how expensive these are inflation.

Hey, I'm not fussy, and Jenna's right. I remember one year I think it might have been my twenty first I went to bed on my actual birthday and I was like, something feels wrong, something feels off. And then I realized I didn't ever.

Birth, hadn't had a cake.

And that's why I make such a point of bringing cake. And I don't care if you're on a fucking diet, I'm bringing cake.

One year, my sister Becky did a prank cake where she baked it. She like dipped a balloon in white chocolate and then popped the balloon and didn't pop the blue and the bloom was insight so that I cut the cake and it popped and everyone laughed and I was like, good prank. Where's the secondary cake? There wasn't one.

Oh I would have cried.

So not only was I pranked, which I hate, I also didn't have a cake on my birthday.

But what was surrounding the balloon?

White chocolate?

Oh, well, you got some white chocolate atah, but you don't see that it's a balloon and I thought it was a round cake doesn't counted the cake.

That's exactly what I felt. I was very upset.

Even like a smash cake that's made of candy doesn't count as a birthday cake.

You know what I I don't think count as a birthday cake. And sorry toddlers, but Donut King cakes donuts in a pyramid.

Do you remember when Donut King used to create the donuts? But they were in the number for my birthday? I remember I had that. I remember that one of the best cakes I've had.

Don't I can do a good fucking donut. Oh that's the koal.

Thank you so much for this, Jenner. That's very sweet.

Now you're welcome. I said, I can't find it. I want will you go to that nearest Coals. I don't care if you've got to go to a Coals Express, Like what's a Coals Express?

And of course you don't drive, mate, I don't care if it's a seven to eleven muffin. If it's a birthday cake, it still counts.

Yes, now, Jenner, we have plates, but we don't have a knife.

There's a knife there.

Jenna always has one on here.

This TELEPROPMT because everything here scripted.

I want to steal this. You know how I stole a knife from the kids office and then I accidentally gave it back when I got your cake. Jenna, Yes, because I left it in the box. Yes, I realized what I'm missing most is not its function as a knife, but as a letter opener. I missed it.

Yeah, it's actually still here.

It's blunt though, Mitchell, I use my sharpener. It's better off now than it was when I fucking got it.

It's got chop written on it, like it's clearly like a Kmarte knife. It's got chop with an exclamation point. But it's been used so much here by the underpaid staff that the sea has been you know, rubbed off. It just says hop.

I think it's the ones you know, you get for free for having Cole's points.

Oh yeah, it's a Stone collaboration with master Share.

We might have to eat this off the cloud because there's fucking sprinkles going every week, No is there. Yeah, it's got blue sprinkles on this little Kohala face and they're going everywhere. Oh no, I'm stressed. It's so cute and you know they'll make a big deal if we mess up with studio.

I'm like, oh God, say the email one person only it's personal vendetta or something something. What are you doing tonight because we're all seeing you tomorrow.

Night.

I mean me and Janey are going You're doing a birthday thing?

Yeah, I was debating. I'm like, my birthday is a Thursday. Do I do something on the Thursday night or the Friday night? Because everyone might have planned on Friday. But honestly, Thursday nights have become the new Friday night. Most people work from home on a Friday, so people tend to get on a Thursday. Really, yeah, I've noticed that, Like if have you been in the Sydney CBD on a Thursday night and I'm on air, I've never let the true I'm always working. Sorry for rubbing it in, that's

God I missed Thursday night shopping, Like is it still a thing? Because I actill ever took part.

Oh, I did every week, but I did as a child, like after school we would go there, yeah and spend time there.

So it was late night shopping right ye till nine? Would the post office stay open late because that's.

All you really, essential services wouldn't stay open.

Well that's fucking stupid.

I know you know you could go to Valley Girl and stuff.

So well, super all the big hitters boy listen, welcome to Is it just me? Every show we start the same with, and is it just me? Something we've noticed, something we hate or appreciate. Mitch does not know mine. I don't know mitches. We used to hear on the show. If you knew celebrate birthdays in a big fashion, we'd get celeb guests, they'd big cash, prizes, prizes, it'd be a whole big bonanza. But we don't anymore because it's just too much pressure on who me. Ah, well, what

Really, I made a montage of all of our gorgeous listeners wishing you happy birthday. Oh yeah, I was like, got your now X to send in a birthday message and I hit it in the sound effect. You didn't know what was coming, so you hit play and you cried because it was gorgeous. Yeah, I can't rememb brought else so I did.

There was other ship well, listen, I've got a montage to play him. We've had our listeners. It's a bigger but this is a listening you didn't know.

I remember that time you actually played the montage I made you and said I made this because it was saying happy birthday, Mitch, and it still applied to me. That for me, but then it was like, I hope you and your boyfriend Hayde and have a good day, and told you that's my montage.

I do have a message from the listeners. Uh, this is beautifulness is poignant, so they want to have you with Mitchell poignant.

I thought you said pointnant. I think if it's trying to say pertinent and poignant at the same time.

Poignant poignant. My dad says, it's so annoying. I can't think of it. Hold on, I did a recall story. It'll come to me. It'll come to me, he always says it. That's so annoying.

You're going to play a thing from listeners.

This is the audio of the listeners in.

Thanks, thank you. What was the name that sent that? In Fanny Fanny General will send you a take back your birthday.

And jenn Is coming out. I'll think of what my dad says. But yeah, and is it just me? Something we've noticed? Hatter appreciate, mich doesn't know Mine, I don't know, Mitches.

Mine is about my birthday. So I made as I'll kick things off.

Oh, would you like to go first?

Sure?

It is Mine's mine is Miney's about the weather, That's all I'm going to say.

I can't wait for that steak around idiots weather?

And what is the astrology?

Too? Yeah?

Go for a Mitchell? Is it just me?

Does something seem like a great idea when you're drunk most.

Most things, Yeah, that's the point of drinking, right, Yeah.

But I come up with some real cooked ideas when I'm drunk, and at the time I really stand by them. I'm like, yeah, that's a great idea.

I don't know, what have you done?

Well, because today's my actual birthday. Last night Sean called me and said, I'm really really stressed about my present view. I said, why, what's wrong? And he goes, well, it's something you said a few months ago that you wanted. And I was like, well, then how can you go wrong? Go for it, get it, and he goes, yeah, but we were drunk at the time, and I went, oh, no, oh, this could be anything. Yeah, what the fuck did I say? And he goes, well, I can't tell you what it

And your drunk self, you're very slippy may Yeah, yeah, you just talk a lot when you're drunk.

Nah that I used to be like that. I think I've learned to read the room a bit better. I've got more to call.

It's not negative, it's just you. You do get chatting. You know, I'm not saying it's you. I like drunk.

I used to run my mouth a lot when I was younger.

Yeah, what was it? Tell us?

Well, this morning he called me for my actual birthday and did the usual Hi, happy birthday, bah, and he goes, listen the thing. I was on the fence about that gear. I didn't end up getting it, but I've got something else on the way. I okay, cool, Well now that now that you're not getting it, can you tell me what you were going to get me?

Here?

Do you want to know what my grand idea when I was drunk was or singing lessons. He made the right hang on, not just singing lessons together.

Couple singing lets singing I actually think that's really quite sweet. Now, where did this come from from within? Because this is deeply shit.

Don't know.

But apparently he was going to book them, and I'm like, thank fuck, you did everything. There's just no way I would have gone and done that. That sounds horrible. You couldn't pay me to go to a couple singing lesson?

Do they even exist? Or you use it a pipe dream that you could do it?

Well, apparently he was looking into it last night and I might leave it. At the last minute, he had his finger holding over the mouth, ready to book, and then he goes, I just don't know if.

You actually want I need to google a couple singing less Oh my god.

But you know what, that's not the first time my drunk self has had that thought. Do you remember a few years ago there was that guy I was dating. We were together for like three months or so, Yeah, and on our first date, I said, so, what do you do for work? And he goes, I'm a singing teacher. And by the way, you emailed me on New Year's Day once inquiring about singing listen, And I remember I was in Vegas with a friend and we were obviously a bit munted, and it was like midnight New Year's Eve,

Oh my god, and he goes, yeah, you never followed up on that. Do you ever? Did he ever make you sing? If you know what I mean?

Oh, he would try to. Like he goes, oh, I think we should work on that. I should give you singing lessons. I want to discover your voice. I had a voice, and I'm telling you to piss off, but you're listening. We're not doing singing lessons.

I don't want to shoot your hopes down. But you, I think, would have a terrible singing voice.

Well that's why you go to lessons, isn't it.

Of course? But like belting, I don't know if you I've heard your belt.

We said we wouldn't talk about that.

It's sorry hearing me belt? I think you could do it. Is this something that you want to explore? Should we bring back the hobby hunt?

Oh my god, let's do singing the podcast, Like we should record me singing prior to a lesson. Yeah, and then I'll obviously go to one and then see if I improve.

Well, if you're going to do it, I'm going to do it. Yeah, because I've got the baritone, you've got the tenor. Like I, I can go low. I'm more an al sobrano are you? Because I think I don't know? Oh sorry, okay, I'd be a tenor. You'd be an alto.

I guess I actually don't know. I won't know until I go to lessons.

That could be a good idea.

I reckon the thought process behind this. Every time I'm drunk, I'm obviously singing at a party whatever, and I think to myself, my voice is beautiful. Yeah, with the right amount of training. Oh could be a stuff.

You know what happens when Mitch gets drunk. He makes us all sit in his living room and watch old music videos. So you must watch.

No one's there against their will. It's always like put this on next.

It's actually the best, the best in the world. It's very fine. Maybe that's where you get the confidence from.

I don't know, but I'm open to doing it as a hobby hunt.

Okay, well, TBC on my hobby hunt singing this is.

I said, I'm I'm keen. Oh you're kids at TVC or no.

TBC is in Like we have to talk off the cloud. If you want to do it, we can do it. But can we get them in here?

Oh? God?

Really well, it just makes things easier if I call my ex. Yeah, oh my god, now that that's good.

Oh I don't think so, Oh my god, you on talking terms?

No?

Why don't think I ever met this one? Did?

I know? Nothing bad like, no bad blood. But we don't need to speak. No, Like I ran into him in the street not too long ago, and we were civil. We said hello, that sort of thing. But no, we don't text or anything.

Yeah, okay, well maybe that could be a nice little reunion.

Yeah, that could be cute.

There's got to be others singing teachers out there, but we want to queer friendly singing teacher. You know, I don't know if they'd be homophobic, they're singing teachers. I say, there, I tell the would be gay as fun.

Yeah right, they go hand in hand. All right, let's do it. I'm down, really yeah, I'm down.

He lock it and we're doing another hobby hunt listens. Yeah, can't wait.

We'll put it on the business of course, is it just me? The rude shocks of young adults? Food? Now?

Coming up a Wednesday, it won't be my birthday, but I suppose we could call it a birthday week, couldn't we.

I'd actually argue that we don't even say it anymore.

Thursday to Thursday, seven day, that's my birthday week. Yeah, Wednesday will.

Count as well.

I think he deserves it.

Okay, she can have it?

Sure, Yeah, well have Episode two twenty two is out on Wednesday. That's kind of a special number, isn't there.

As you get astrotash on, there's surely some astrology in there too.

But coming up in that episode, one of my main pop girls has let me down. And I'm not talking about Katie Perry.

Oh god, I was gonna say Katie, I love that, that's who springs to.

My Katie's let the world down. It'd be so first thought if you said Katie people world let her down. No, I think it's terrible. It's pretty bad. She worked with a sex abusers read the room because.

You know what woman's world. It is a horrible song. But I've realized, as I hate that, I give myself permission to enjoy horrible things. It's a terrible song, and yet I like it.

No, I like it, and I think it sounds fine and it's it's a great dance song. But I think she needed more from her comeback, absolutely, and I can see in her eyes that I think she's feeling a bit stressed. Have you seen interviews impressed with Katie like she Apparently she's failing in the she's not doing well. Okay, So another pop girly, Yes, that's okay. Interesting. Also, I have a task for Jenna coming up.

Annual task.

You've got one in your contract per year, and I have a challenge for you, actually your rise to the occasion because I've been working over time as as Mitchell, and I just think you need to pull your weight, says you. I got that cake for you, Mitchell, and Jet is now claiming she got I got the Shall we do my issue just me?

Actually, before we do that, can I just take this time to address something. This is not an all staff meeting. It's an all team meeting. Oh wow, and the idiot. Wow, we need to address something. Yeah, we do our merch. There's been an issue. If you were yet to buy our merch, don't let this deter you because the issue has been sorted. But if you already have gotten your hands on some of our merch, listen up because this might apply to you, especially the hoodies and the jumpers.

Yeah, listen, this isn't that our best work. But it wasn't our fault.

No, it wasn't. Normally, when we do merch, we get samples before it goes on sale so that we can get our eyes on it be like, yep, we like it cool. This time around, we were told, oh, it's going to be as color, which is like a good fucking brand, great basics, and everyone was excited. We were like, fuck it. Put it on sale. A couple of weeks ago. Mitch Jenner and I received our merch very late. We looked at it and said, what, for the love of God is that?

What the heck?

The printing quality on the jumpers and the hoodies, it was just shocking, especially my beautiful ears to our inspired design. It has what like five or six photos of us, and it's so poor quality that you can't even see our eyes. It looks like someone's run it through the dryer for four days straight and it's melted. The print

Absolutely fine, perfect.

It's only the hoodies and the jumpers, which makes no sense because the T shirt's a cheap and yet the print looks beautiful. And then the more expensive hoodies and stuff they turned out really shit. And so it's been sorted. If you buy a hoodie or jumper henceforth, it'll be gorgeous quality, the print will be beautiful, no problems, However, if you've already received one, just letting you know, you are allowed to jump on our website a couple of miches dot com dowt of you go to the contact

We wanted to make sure that it was all fair, so you can do it, and we want you to be happy with the merch you buy, because you're supporting us at the end of the day, and you know, it's quite a cute.

We've had not one complaint from the people that have received this horrible quality merch so far, so obviously they don't mind. They're happy with it. But we're here to tell you that you deserve better. You deserve better, so jump on and exchange it. If you've got one already and it looks a bit horrible.

I mean I got mine and it just was I couldn't even make out who it was.

No, yeah, it was that bad. I might post in a group because we seem to celebrate all of our merch fuck ups. Remember the typo on our very first jumper. Rang I don't remember a bit of blinds that said Billy's.

Oh yeah, but that made it a rare piece.

Yes, discounted it.

Yeah, we saw the Misspelt Merche home Water that was.

Very on brand.

But this one, I'm not as entertained by this we were, but I'm as well posting in the group. I'll show you the difference in quality. It's just so bad, really enough.

Jenna's Mona Lisa Amona Jenna was a great quality.

Or you're out, Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, no, that's an amazing poster.

Absolutely, there's actually no issues with anything else, like the posters, the carps, the fucking shirts, long sleeve, short sleeve, what have you. They're all fine. It's only the ironically more expensive yeah jumpers and hoodies. But it's all been sorted. Yeah, make sure you'd get an exchange if you got one of the ship ones. We apologize.

Oh we're sorry idiots if you bought it and thought, god, this isn't really like them, it's not. We did not know that that was happening, and we adore you and love the support. And you can refund on the website if you want, and if you buy merch from this point on the best quality.

There is not refund, exchange exchange, no refund. You bet your Arthur went full Mitchell Combs on those people. I had been thought it idiots.

It's been terrifying. I would be shocking Birthday week as well. It's been very busy. All right, shall we do my agym?

Yes? Please? Okay, it's with it, go Bradley.

Is it just me?

Is it chic to wear a winter coat in winter on holidays but cringe to wear a winter coat in winter at home, wait, in the house, anywhere anywhere? Define winter coat, long trench, trench coat, thick wool buttons. I'm talking, inspector, gadget. We're talking like full detective. It's creaty to me. This is just me talking. I don't want frustrating against anyone. But there's nothing hotter than being in Europe or being on holiday in America, orever you're holidaying in winter wearing

You may tag Sean next time, because he wears all that ship all day every day.

I feel like Sean suits it.

No, I think it's cringe.

Wear Sean, where are you going?

Why are you wearing a coat? You're at home. Coats are for travel, Coats are for leisure. You want to be mysterious.

I don't want to catch your death out there. It's been fucking chilly, bitter winter in Sydney, by.

Bitter pafa belly paa. But get a sweater like the rest of us, for God's.

Sake, I actually do. I am quite fond of my pafa.

But I am too, I love my paffa.

I don't not wear coats because I think they're cringe. It's because they don't suit me, like the long ass trenches. I'm not a tall person. It looks like I'm playing dress ups dad's clothes.

Yeah yeah, see, I wore one around Europe and I look back at those photos and I think, who is that man? He's mysterious, he fucks, he's fun that he's well feed look at the money. It was from H and M. It was thirty pounds on sale. But I've tried to wear that here in winter and I look at myself and I just look like an idiot. Who is that fool wearing a coat? Like you're at home, mate, you're at work, cans?

Are you going to many formal ish occasions?

Maybe that's it. Maybe I just haven't worked out a way to incorporate my coat into my lifestyle because.

I don't feel the need to because everywhere I go it's very casual. I can get away with the hoodie.

What if I wear it's your birthday dinner tomorrow and you tell me if it looks right, I'm gonna wear my I'm gonna wear it an outfit I wore exactly to Europe, and I'm just gonna see how it works. And it's a gorgeous venue. You're holding it out so the transcur.

Out of place. I'm going to the local bolow. It's so daggy and tragic, and that's why I love it.

That's my point, Mitchell. You're walking around the streets of Rome. It's going to be all these.

Mums in cigarette stained trackings and you're there fucking dress for a dawn service.

You and Sean See you get my points. You get my point. It doesn't make sense in this country where you live. Don't wear your trench coats here in Australia. It's cringe to me. I'm sorry, I don't know.

Are you like me where you run a bit hot?

Oh?

Yeah, some people probably need them for just actual warm.

Yeah, I'm the opposite. I run very cold.

True, So well, I'm not shaming. They're skinny. Good for fucking you. I'm a porky boy. I need to have a jacket. You're hidden it. But yeah, you're true. I run hot pre menopause at twenty eight. Jenna. I feel like you're one of those cringe people that can wear a coat in life at home.

Yeah, I do.

Look at her right now, she's practically shivering her tits off.

I'm really cold.

See, I'd never be caught dead in that outfit. But that's got nothing to do with the cringe of the trench coat.

Have I ever seen you in shorts? Jenna? I don't think I have, no I have.

Remember when you played for the Kiss netball team?

Oh yeah, yeah, really I saw Jenner.

And shorts she's what you're doing watching the kiss nipball team having a we won, we won.

They put photos up and I saw Gennie she's got pins on her anyway, just I just I will try my best to wear a winter coat, but I just can't do it. It's the same way that, like what happens in travel, like what happens on you do, you act different when you're traveling. I feel I do it too. I'm a different person when I'm traveling. My mindset. I have a wallet. I don't hold an every day life

I don't think anyone's paying that much attention to you, to be honest, if you wore a coat, no one would second guess it.

So it's coming from within, is what you're saying.

Probably, But if you don't want to wear a coat, then don't bloody wear a coat.

Knife the bowler. I'm gonna wear a coat, yeah, you have to, and a monocle. I do have one, though done as I had to keep it because you've got a squid just one eye the whole time. However, invented the monocle is just be on the fly, dumbest piece of accessory.

Out make a very respectable Monopoly man. Now that I think of it, I wanted to be your next Halloween costume.

You know, mister Monopoly doesn't have a monacle. Oh yeah, it's a it's a it's a Mendela effect.

Oh yeah, I sing that, but he does. And it's one about Pikachu not having a lightning bolt at a certain point or something Mendela effects. Jenna, can you google that the peaka.

If you want mit chest laptop, he can laptop.

I'm not sharing my laptop.

You've tweet I meant to bring your happiest of birthdays. This is nice from Kerrianne Kennelly to gorgeous Mitchell Coombs.

So nice.

Yeah, oh, she's just tweeted again. Tag it. Well, that's just that's carry Anna to a t.

Got something on your mind up at a couple of Mitchell's on Instagram to get yourself on the show.

All right, let's do what is it? Just you now?

This is.

Oh dear, oh no, what, oh my god? What I forgot to get one today.

Oh, for God's sake, Actually, I forgot you have one job.

I didn't. I knew it was coming to and I didn't even think.

You want to just cold call someone off?

I can just get someone from the A r N staff room.

No, I could get someone getting one of our fucking tope bags.

No, No, they don't need to get it. What do you mean cold call someone.

As in we're not warning them. I'll go through our text message.

Oh yeah, that's a good idea.

There's no mouse to this computer anymore.

Here you go, I can't dial it.

I'll just call them, ma, just go, just get the mouse out.

You really got to start from scratch with them.

Sometimes there's no mouse.

Go to the other side of the desk where it is.

It doesn't work. They're not connected him.

Yes it is. If you press F one, it switches to the first screen. There you go, But then that doesn't just swing the screen around.

Fucking hate this, all right, what's the moment number?

Oh and by the way, they've not given they're not given their name or anything.

They answer.

It was this the last person that texted us on the hotline.

Hello Naomi speaking, Hi.

Naomi, It's Mitch Mitch Jenna from the hit podcast?

Is it just me?

How are you good? Thank you?

How are you?

Spot Darland? But Mitchell fucking Cherry forgot to organize? And is it just me called? That's what I was like, Well, we're just going to call the last person that texted us. Are you ready to go?

I am ready?

Hey?

Whereabouts in the world are you?

I mean, kill Si Victoria?

I didn't catch that kill Sith kill Sich.

Yeah, it's like Eastern Suburbs, Croydon.

Lovely and what have we interrupted? You're doing?

I'm making a bed?

Yeah? How long have you listened to the show since I.

First heard your ad when you were doing the who was that old radio guy you interviewed?

John?

Yes, I heard it come through and it was a suggestion from Spotify and I've been listening to it intent.

God loves Spotify. I didn't know they pushed that one out for it.

They did, like long time ago.

Thanks Spotify. All right, well let's get you on. We don't know what your resard is you is so if this is in any form of fensive or derogatory, is it just me proprietary limited distance ourselves?

I know what it is I've read the text. I back, he let's go no name.

Is it just me.

To people who hang masks from their windscreens virtue signaling just annoy you.

As in like COVID masks, right, yes, yes, I've not seen this from the like revision mirror.

Yeah, yeah, in their cars, the disposable ones that are meant to go in the binning when you've finished you thing.

Oh why are people doing this?

I think some people, like maybe my neighbor, like to let people know that they're working with people in that kind of facility.

Or so it's like a baby on board sign.

Yeah yeah, old people in my life? Is that what I'm saying? Immuno compromise Maybe, like maybe people don't know it near me.

Yeah.

But also you're so right, Kathy, You're so true. It's also like, dude, they expire after one use. They're disposable for a reason.

Yeah, Like we know you work, you know, you're what do they call it, like a front line frontline worker. Yeah, so you've caught me on the hop. So I'm all nervous because I'm talking.

To you guys.

Fine, I know that this was a thing that they hang masks COVID masks to signify something and what's your beef with it? Exactly?

Well, I know you're not a nurse because I am.

And then your neighbor in particular.

Yeah, I've noticed it with a few ring in frontline workers.

Well, you don't know, the neighbor might be immuno compromise. Why did you pop over right now and ask them what's wrong with you?

Yeah? Why don't you coffee their mouth live on the podcast? That'd be funny, you know what. It reminds me of those my family stickers that were on the back of every hondity in the country. My mum had them too. Of course it's totally doesn't Then saw a sixty minutes expose where it was like family young family killed and the murderer knew how many to kill because it was on the back of her goddamn CRV. So mum ripped those things off.

Did your mom have one for?

The dog?

Had one for? I know? And also the mum with bub It's like you.

Baby on board, baby on board?

It's like, do we want to tell people if there's a baby on the board? The creeps would be like health allow that car.

Yeah, I always question the purpose of a baby on board? Sign that need to make someone think I was going to rear end you, but no I won't.

It's when if they're in an accident, trapped.

We had this conversation before. I feel like Jenna's shut me down before.

I think I tell the paramedic when you called them like there's a baby on board. I don't think the paramedics are looking.

They'd probably guess from the car seat.

Yeah, exactly right.

What if it's beneath rubble?

They Yeah, I don't know.

I deal with the other end.

So what do you deal with?

Just emergency stuff?

Yeah, Naomi, No, that's what you're doing, the lord's work. Sorry to interrupt your busy work, David, Jenny didn't plan the call.

He would be the organizing my cake, wasn't he?

So he rewrite history gener it works. People believe it, and they believe me becase I'm a man.

Thank you, thanks so much for dropping everything for it.

Jen.

I will send you one of out tote bags and make sure you hit her up.

Yeah, I will do. Thank you so much, and thanks for putting up with my nervousness to Oh, thank you. I just love listening to you guys.

I just keep going.

You're just all so brilliant.

Well we're not. Actually today we're announcing we're canceling the show.

No we're not. We're not.

What would you do if we canceled, to be honest, like, would you just be so hurt?

I think they take it personally.

Yeah, I think people would.

I did when you when they're all right, hey one.

Just canceled, you would trash bag too.

Yeah.

I just love it. I just absolutely love it. It's so nice to hear it. Yeah, intelligent people.

Just have it.

That's nice.

What podcasts are you listening to? What's the hearing alternative? I should have gone to Specsavers, should have gone.

To Fred Hollis. He's the eyes looks Fraser. I think she's a spokesperson for it. Maybe Charlie t or some ship any love.

You very much, have your Miami love you guys.

Thanks, I want a sweetheart.

Now listen. If you want to come on the show with then is it just me? It could happen at any moment. You're putting yourself on the line. We could just ring you at the drop of a hat. All you've got to do is messages. A couple of mitches or send us a text.

This is the number.

Oh far till nine A Joes zero two.

Nine.

That is us Mitchell Birthday episode complete, Happy Birthday, Thank you, and we'll see tomorrow night. Personally, obviously you're not invited idiots media only, but the photo war will be there.

Sewan called the Bowling and tried to reserve a table. They're like, nah, just rock up early. They refused to put out a reserve sight did they even have reserve? Now I have to walk down there at fucking three pm or something. Just wait for everyone's bag the table.

What time does it start?

I don't know. I'm just kind of winging it here. It's only a twenty eighth.

I'm getting my botox at two pm, so I'm going to be really red raw.

Oh yeah, you'll have the little scabs.

I will.

That will.

I'll be shocked.

I'll notice because they'll be looking at your gorgeous kate.

Yeah. I thought you're gonna say, my gorgeous, youthful boyfriend teaching for that. Yeah, Stephen's coming, okay, good, yeah, bless Stephen got your gift?

Did he loves to buy your gift? Huh?

He brought you a gift before I even knew you. Remember I brought you a wax koala.

In fact, every time I've seen him, his gift for me something I really should fucking return to fame, his love languages, gifts.

He's never gifted me anything.

He hasn't. Nobody really hates you. It's really we're going to get angel on.

But he still sees three your sheet one hundred percent.

He's very intuitive, very smart. He had an atar, which is he for the international listeners, like the end of year scoring system in New South Wales like ninety eight.

Oh, I didn't know the scores had come out this year. Yet it's very good.

At two birthday I was a good still tag sharp as ever at twenty eight everybunday. All right, let's go. We'll see you all in a week.

Good a couple of days, actually, Yanks, we'll catch you on Wednesday. Idiots, thanks for listening.

By that is it just me?

A podcast by a couple of miches.

Make sure you've hit follow on your podcast. A welcome to add brief our secret segment on the end. We pretend the show's.

Done, but it is not. I've made a mistake. Why Well, because I didn't organize her. Is it just you caller? I text my producer Grace and said, think of anidym now, and she sent.

She thought that you were asking her to produce you. Yeah, she said, a list of talking points?

Is how good my producer is. I'll be interviewing someone and I'll message and be like, look what was their last album? So she'll then research and send it to me on the fly.

She's very I hope that that's not how you speak to her normally.

Think of now? No, because it hit me. Fuck, I haven't done it. I haven't got a caller. I forgot today. So I text her and said, just like, think of one and then so I have to get her into think.

My solution was much better. Just call someone that's already texted us.

Yeah a fact. No, but she's I wanted to come in and do one of these because I said to her she could. Okay, of course, so she's she's coming at some point. So just be prepared for a surprise birthday guest. It's not a surprise, mate, Just be prepared for a birthday guest.

Right.

Cool?

She sent me options that is gorgeous?

Really nice?

Are you not telling it's because you're going to run them at sunset.

They're actually very good.

Come Grace, God producer, Grace, take a seat here. I can't believe you sent him a list of visits just me and he spoke to you like that. Think of it a jym, Now he did.

Grace produces my many radio shows. She's also a good personal friend than She looks great today as well.

In Red Well, we had a thing with important people, so I wanted.

To look like That's why I didn't get the caller because we had to. We had to schmooze like clients that sell within the radio station, so I had to like go and talk to people, and in fact I was schmoozing about radio and they brought up the podcast. Oh did they?

Yeah?

Yeah, remember we did. You may have heard these idiots, but we did a diserono ad about the Liqueur.

I think they're still running now.

The armond Emmeretto sours. Yes, Like I just want to say, we are diso so happy. They love the arm and Liqueur like they loved working with you guys.

Fuck yeah, first time I've ever been paid to drink on the job. Did the r sound?

Grace and I had a bunch of finger sandwiches. Today we did.

I actually had a bunch of the Mani kisheshunch we should save them for night because we're un till ten pm.

There's heaps around there.

We'll be eating that.

I thought that was a birthday spread for me.

It was grace. Why don't you these gyms things? You've had thoughts for a while?

Well, you asked me and then you said can you think of one? And then didn't reply, So I just wrote mostly a stream of consciousness.

Okay, Well what are that? Is that?

Really? How many ices you can pump out of the drop.

Of my hat? Three four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten eleven gems? Wow?

Holy fuck? Too many? Did I go too hard?

Maybe? Ten too many?

I bet he's going to use them though?

Yeah, well, why don't you do a couple of your favorite? Because I feel like you will just do one all your favorite or we can burn through them. We call them gems on the fly when they're really quick fleeting thoughts.

Is it just me? Or should print hang on? Has Bradley clocked.

Off for the day?

Oh?

Sorry? Sorry? Sorry?

Sorry?

Is it just me?

Should?

Printers have evolved far more technologically at this point in time, because they are the worst piece of technology.

If it breaks, it's gone for the whole day. I don't know how to fix it. There's too many drawers.

I don't know where paper goes still using.

Also, they have three D printers, so why can't they fix these.

I'm yet to see one work, and I don't think even if I saw it, i'd believe it.

Yeah, And also, people that are so proud of their three D printed items they hand them to you and they're always really shit. They're just so brittle and they're never perfect, and it's kind of like, this is a chaur that I printed, and it's kind of got like little fraying bits of plastic that you got to pick off, like it's grow.

What about that that lamp that one of our listeners printed for us and I couldn't wrap my head around it.

I was like, oh, you printed, that was cute.

Actually, I got given a little like three D printed photo as an engagement gift, which is beautiful in theory, but in practice it's like, you know, if you look at a photo of yourself and it's in like reverse, it looks like the colors are all inverted, so your teeth are.

Likely press the button on your phone.

And it's nice if you hold it up to a lamp, But how often are you holding up this little plastic bit to a lamp?

So?

True?

True?

And what's more just burn through?

Sorry?

Is it just me?

Or?

Should utensils have more than one purpose? Melon ballers are fucked?

What a fucked melon ballers conversation?

Morning? I think that if you're going to have a utensil in a drawer, like it needs to have more than one purpose? Was I get that my bawling melons?

You know what I mean?

Like, I just I can't around it? Will you can use that? It's an ice cream?

Scooper?

Someone?

Morning?

And I said, then what else.

Exactly that's about it? Really nothing?

Is it just me?

Or do you hate wedding merch? I don't want to be a cooler with your name on it?

Oh yeah, I agree.

Yeah.

When my sister got married, they said will you be in the grooms You'll be a groomsman And it was a case of a custom case of beer, like in the written on the beer drink drink drink, Yeah, and I would rather be a bridesmaid.

You don't drink, not really barely.

When was the last time you saw me drink?

I mean literally last week. I can't remember which episode. You were saying you need to invite me in more things, and then my social da I drink again? And now I drink? Have you been lying to Grace?

I barely drink maybe two drinks, yeah, I don't go over two or three or one cocktail yeah, or a wine you know. Yeah, So I guess, Okay, I do drink. You do, but I'm smart about it.

You know.

I actually had this conversation with my wife this morning. We're talking about there's a couple of work events we've got coming up, and I was like, I think I'm going to follow Mitch's lead in terms of having drinks. Yeah, because like I always get a bit excited.

And then I'm like, yeah, they're three.

Yeah.

I'm like, well, you know, cost of living, I need to make the most of this.

Yeah.

But you're smart, and I think I need to follow you.

Think you was so nice to be complimented on this show and not stupid. Nothing else that's really it. It's mostly stupid.

Is it just me?

Or is white collar crime kind of okay?

Oh my god. We spoke about this on the show.

Actually, what's white color crime? You know?

It's like financial fraud, like tax evasion and embezzment of money. Why are fraud? It's kind of like you're smart.

I feel like when I hear those stories, I'm like, you deserve.

Yes, insider trading, like everything else.

Is who you know?

Why not.

Trading? It sounds kind of fun.

It's a victimless crime.

But also we all insider trade that it just called gossip.

I mean we do, right, I think it's a bit different. Well, there's the.

Money involved, and I guess there is. What am I talking about?

It's a fantastic question.

Has been great.

Is it just me?

Or do you have no desire to go to space? Even if I was offered an all expenses paid trip to space, I'd prefer to go to Thailand or something.

It depends how long it takes to get there for the long haul.

Fuck that. I think you'd rather space of a barley, though? Can I speak for you confidently?

Maybe it depends It depends on how long the flight is.

Yeah, but there's nothing to do in space. We just look out the window.

And also like it's probably so vast and so big and so black, like you wouldn't see anything.

Yeah, but I think the no gravity thing does excite me.

I would mind having a glance at Earth from Afar and then I'd be like, take me home and give a fuck about mercury and whatnot.

On YouTube exactly.

I agree, zero gravity exists on Earth. Yeah's train astronauts, they can do it.

Yeah, Hobby Hunt, we're going for a flight singing in space.

Grace, thank you so much. That is incredible.

Means you know what's going to happen. Now you're going to forget which ones to you. Then you're going to read from her list.

She didn't do all of them. So okay, here's the thing. Over the next month, I'm going to incorporate one gem that is Grace's and you need to try and pick if it's the Grace gym. That's a challenge.

Thanks great, Okay, I reckon I could pick it? Well, will there give me it?

Give me a month? Will Isn't she the best? I'm so lucky. She's very good. And to say first to my notes ladies and gentlemen.

So by Jenna, I don't know have Mitch updated you, but we've lost a team member here is it just me? HQ.

Yeah what hoops thyroid cancer. That's not funny. Oh sorry, I don't mean you're such a good actor, but.

About throd cancer.

Oh my god. I just to record podcast with him four weeks ago.

No, no one, he was hiding it from you, a wig.

No one's dead, but someone's handed in their resignation.

Who is Oscar? After the way I spoke to him allegedly.

No I moderated callum what yeah, yeah, he's quit. Why he doesn't want to moderate anymore?

He did?

He said it's too busy.

Well, to be fair, we inspired his interest in radio. He's now working in radio.

He's doing very soon.

I said, like, I've got three jobs. I don't have time for this anymore. And I was like, fuck, of course, I didn't know that it was taking up that much time at all. If it's too much, the guy, that's so funny.

You know, we all have five jobs and do it, but it's all good.

But yeah, I was like, you know, that's so fine. I actually kind of forgot that we still had moderators. Remember the moderator games from like twenty twenty.

Yeah, we need to bring them back, but clearly where.

We need now.

He was another girl who got it with Steph.

She still moderates. I think, yeah.

I did a check him with her recently, saying just checking, are you still fine to keep doing this job? She's like, yeah, I'd love to.

Of course.

I love being a moderator. Okay, And god, I'm just an awful employer. I didn't even think to check him with Callum this whole time. It's been bloody working like a dog trying to moderate and do his actual job.

Well, no, because he like we talked to him, We've met him, he's been on the show. He's a sweetheart. We love him. So we talked to him often, actually so, but I did not even check to see if he was all right.

Oh well, now we have a vacancy.

Maybe we should bring back the moderator games. Oh my god, I think we bring back the Moderator Games. For those who don't know what they are, is we held our version of the Olympic Games.

I thought it was more Hunger Games.

Jason, Well, no, I'm just trying not to say Olympic Game. But what about l Olympics Olympics? Remember last week we said, yeah, l she's got a limp.

Olympics. You just post the photo of her in a moonboot Olympics.

L on crutches, l from stranger things on crutches. That's how we get around it. We do the moderator games, which is basically, yeah, like the Hunger game. So so okay, let's do an open casting now.

It was such a fucking stupid concept because they were competing. We have to eliminate people from the games. They were competing for an unpaid task.

I actually think that's a bit unethical, a bit.

Yeah, okay, here's the thing, and I love how he felt that he had to resign and ask permission to stop doing it. I was like, yeah, it's fine.

What a moderator is. We have a Facebook group.

Now.

I've had people this week message me and go, how the fuck did I not know that you had a Facebook group? Because I love it. I get so much more extra info and it's so engaging. Yeah, our idiots are amazing.

And how are they not in the loop about the group?

They didn't know? I don't know, I don't know we have a Facebook.

Do they not listen?

Idiot? Go and join in a good way.

Our idiots or dumb fuck idiots in the derogatory sense, dumb fuck.

Okay, so enduring idiots E n D. You are a NT to spell it because it's not actually.

A real worm, as we've discovered. But there's a link in the show notes anyway. Yeah, so just where if you're listening on click info show notes, tap it, go join it. Moderators are people that volunteer their time. I mean there's not really much time. You just have to approve posts that go in if there's something that goes in there again, the requests to join as a member, you can approve or decline, but I don't. There's not any salacious ship being written in the group, so it's

Can I just suggest can we send cal a tote bag just to say thank you? Oh we better Jenna, Yeah, of course, one of the limited ones.

Yeah, I don't have access to the non limited Okay, great, yeah, yeah, the scabby one.

I mean, there were a tissue until Mitchell got involved. Is this a tote bag? It was a fucking napkin.

But if it was one of those little velvet jewelry purses, we thought it was a tote bag.

Oh that funny. Yeah, And you moderate the group, you get to be involved, you get to talk to us. It's very fun. If you would like to apply for our moderator role, the moderator games will be back. However, they won't be as ruthless. We're more ethical now. We have to think of a mechanic, but we will bring them back.

When you say we this is your baby, Jenna, this is yours?

Well, what if we did the moderator games but we killed the people that didn't get it?

I'm quite sorry that.

I think that's it.

You're feeling all right today, you're saying some weirds.

Oh am, I it's going to be a fourteen hour day for me everyone and I had a thirteen hour day yesterday.

So yeah, it's really but it's not in your job, not about you today. It's Mitchell Krimsbuff.

I've been told, yeah, I've been told.

With the mister phobes mind ever had a sliver of my kohala cake.

Oh, please have it?

How am I going to eat it?

Jenna, there's no forks, or she wouldn't know's I bought it.

She did not buy it.

Yeah, and that's right. And Jenna is meant to get a call.

I remember I was in the mid Yeah, that's where she went wrong. I said, Jenna, I'm free antick this week, as I am every week. Can you get a caller? But she heard koala?

Yeah?

I thought you made a koala.

Oh? Can I have a slither too?

Yeah?

What flavor?

Just beware of sprinkles. They're fucking going everywhere.

Can you slice it on your birthday? Well it would just be easier than twisting it across one too. Sure, we'll piece off the iHeartRadio.

I need to fork or something.

Just hoose your hands.

I'm a lady.

Would you like me to go and get some forks?

Just worried about these fucking sprinkles.

The vacuum can come.

You say that, but then we're going to get a fucking email tomorrow.

Why did you give me the biggest fucking slice. I feel like that was pointed that was for her.

And this is the biggest Oh, it looks fucking dense.

All right, So, Jenna, why don't you tell the story that I told you about how I found it?

No, I let you.

This is the most elaborate gasline Jenner ever. Oh my god, it smells lovely. Okay, I'll keep talking while you eat my cake. Sureep, listen to the crunch of those sprinkles. Like so, it's a double a vanilla sponge filled with jam top with sprinkles and edible decorations. I'm having one of his these.

Wow, oh, look at that jam.

That doesn't look edible. Imagine that wasn't the edible decoration and I just bite into it. Does that look edible to you? Feel?

Hold on you mind that chocolate?

Oh that's the yummy? Could you stop chewing to the point over this? Sorry anyway? Yeah, very happy with this. Love it.

So what did Jean end up getting you?

I haven't seen him yet. Oh he got me like a temporary little gift because there's a big thing on the way. Don't be faul Sean. If you're listening, stop because we're talking about your anniversary present again. I told you that I got him the doctor who chest set Well it turned out and it wasn't a chest set. It was just the bits. What do you mean, just the like players, you know, they the pawn And I

It's it's going to be two months late.

I know.

That's why I can't make him feel bad because he's apparently ordered something for my birthday that's going to be late. And I was like, well, it might even still beat your anniversity present. I can't give him just the doctor who themed chess pieces, No you can't.

It's like giving him a tennis ball but no racket, yeah, you totally, and chopping board, no knife. And he's like, what the fuck do we do with this monopoly? No cash? Well, I was away for Steven's but just.

Give him dip but nothing to dip in it.

Yeah, because you're so right. Chips would be fine because you can just step the chips, but keep I mean you can't. What are you to do with all these chess pieces? About a ball? Oh? So he gets it, he's fine. That cake was delicious, to be.

Honest, really good.

It's actually really fucking good.

Well, we probably should end it on that notement. Sure, let's go enjoy this cake and piece. Yeah we better.

We hope this podcast made you feel at least two percent better today. It's all just two percent so good. We'll catch you on Wednesday for the remains of my birthday.

Week, canal Yeah, of course I think you should. You deserve it. Oh thanks, that's fine. Leave us a five star review if you haven't already, and we will see you guys very soon in a couple of days.

Catch you then, bye, bub.

Fine Is it just me? A podcast by a couple of mechs.

Make sure you've hit follow on your podcast app.