#20: Best 'Neighbours' Catfight Scenes

People do.

Some weird ship it should in young people, inhaling the gas from cooking canisters known as names to get high.

Some things that make more sense than others.

Something everything for you put my career on home. I could have been anything if I'd had the talent.

Brace yourself for observations you didn't ask for.

This is leadership. I think he's one of the greatest leaders we've ever had. Well good, Just.

A couple of Mitches. One of us be Mitch and the other be Mitchell. Just to make things easier.

Your Mitch, I only call you Mitchell when you're being annoying.

You always call me Mitchell. Oh no, he is Mitch. Julie and Mitchell Koo. Welcome back today.

Here we are once again.

We're here. Even though it's the end of the world.

Apocalypse is nice, It's not really apocalypse. Doesn't that mean that everyone explodes or something?

Apocalypse is the end of the world.

Former producer Jenna can you google the definition of apocalypse?

If I have to?

Groundskeeper get on it.

You know that groundskeeper Jenner, the new title we've given her ever since she was stripped of being a producer, actually makes the most amount of sense. Because all she does on this podcast is sit here and insult us, which keeps us grounded.

You're metaphorically keeping us grounded.

Exactly the only reason she's here.

You don't do much else. You actually come in with zero prep. We prep the show and you just sit there and line.

Can you tell us one thing that's happening on this podcast?

I have absolutely not. I do know that I don't want to be here, but other than that.

You can go. Bro. Isn't the LM today?

Yeah?

It is. Actually we're recording early for you, so hopefully you make it out, Jenna. Yeah, hopefully you will like the Big Bang theory in Jenn's our laugh track.

That was stupid. Jesus, do you feel like bad for missing Zomba, because I'll tell you one thing. I've had to miss Pilarates the last few weeks because of my bloody hand injury.

I'm still going.

Went back to my first class last night, and I'm a new person. You might notice how calm I am today. Actually you have been calmer, not the last few weeks in general. No, you're not without me, pillarties, I've been a bloody mess.

What is bloodies? I actually don't know.

So it's like it's quite. When you leave, you realize, oh my god, that was actually really an intense amount of exercise, quite a workout, but it's better and because it's done under the guise of, oh, we're going to put on Spotify meditation music, put a nice candle on, so you don't realize how much exercise you're doing because it's all peaceful and nice. I believe having done more of a workout than I would have ever done at the gym.

Okay, I back it. I could never do it.

Do you sweat, Yes, it's like a lot of core stuff, so like sit ups and twisting and bending and all that sort of stuff. Haven't been out to down with dog for weeks though, you would sweat, Yeah.

But I didn't know if it's like you're running or maybe you don't sweat. Maybe that's not heaps.

Because you are so calm. But it obviously does produce a sweat, not as much as at the gym, when there's just a slight sense of panic and everything you do gym.

You know Michelle Bridges podcast every night she's.

Out drink driving. She's not doing any of this fito anymore.

Oh no, she got charge and she I believe so poor not doing RBTs anymore with a virus, So she got her down a bottle and go out with a commando.

Do you remember that episode of The Biggest Loser where they used to do home visits where the trainers would spend a week with the fat so is to see how they live right, And at one point, these two fat guys bring out their meal and Michelle Bridges just started crying. She saw the size of the burrito. She's like, it's the size of a newborn child that has started crying because.

They had to also eat the meal as well.

With the trainers had to eat what they are Bridges eating this massive burrito, but she just started crying. And afterwards I think they brought out like a tub of ice cream each and filled it with M and m's, and that's where she was just gone. You know what that is?

Juicers thing like, guys, let's let's just fuck with miss Bridge Bridges. She's already got a drinking problem. Just tip the M and m's in the tub of the commossaw. I remember this is true. I used to think some poor boy came up. It's like I'm one hundred and fifteen killers, and I was like that, I'll never get there. Literally, I am. I could be on the Biggest Loser.

Do you weigh yourself?

I don't mind myself. It's too traumatic.

Okay, yeah I don't, just because I don't own a scales, but apparently it's better not too I don't know. Yeah, I need those commercial that's how you feel all that shit.

Yeah, but you know I could lose some. I got on the gym. I went to the gym the other day, first time in months. Got on the way you did. Yeah on a Saturday.

Wow. I didn't know about this.

But as I was running, it's in Coronella and it's right opposite Cold Rock, and I got a cold Rock straight after because the whole time I was on the treadmill, I could see people mix and mixings on the cold bench. So I went and got one.

I did have a Rodae thraight after. PILARATEI.

So you're own the humans, so you're burning calories so you can put It's like it just equals negative, right, cancels each other out.

I don't think you would have burned. I don't how long you're on the treadmill. But I doubt you burnt enough to warrant an entire cold rock irving. No, that's a lot of shit.

Anyway, let's get into the show. If it's your first time listening, Welcome, I'm Mitch. That's Mitch. There's Jenna. This is just me. And there's not really much to say about the show. There's no real spine to it.

You say it every week though, what what the show is?

Yeah, but I mean it's just a couple. Is it just me? Then we just throw shit against the wall and open Steve.

And it's not what you're not not a good salesman at all.

But they're already listening. They've already if they got through that fucking waffle about.

Michelle Bridge's drinking problem.

We kick off the show every week with it is it just me? It's something we've noticed, something we hate or appreciate.

We both have one is it just me each and the other doesn't know what it's going to be, And so far we've only clashed once. That's when we're both talking about coronavirus. Tell me, we're not talking about coronavirus this week?

And that's Mine's like social quarantine vibes, but nothing to do with the virus.

Okay, well, mine's nothing of the thought. So let's dive into mind. Shall we are? Corona Free break?

Okay, here we go. Is it just me?

Has the TV show Neighbors absolutely gone to shit?

I never watched it in the first place, so I've never seen an episode in my life.

I was such a Neighbors fan back in the day. I feel like there was two types of people. You either loved Neighbors or Home and Away. I don't know why they had to be loyalty. They weren't on at the same time. You could easily watch both.

Well, you see, At first I was a Neighbors fan, yeah, and then during my teenage years I was a Home and Away fan.

Really, coming of age? Is one more mature than the other? Genuine question? Just one deal with sex and drugs and the other ones more so birthday cakes and divorce.

I don't know, because I've never really watched Home in Away. But Neighbors is meant to be family friendly and light and fluffy, but it gets really intense, which brings me to why I've brought up this week's is It just me? Apparently last week was Neighbours thirty five year anniversary week. So they had this special week of stuff plan and I saw a promo on TV for it, and it's possibly the worst out I've ever seen. I was like, there is not one thing about that that I think

In thirty five years of Neighbors, there's never been a week like this.

Five weddings, three deaths.

It all kicks off Monday. My goodnessman, I don't even change the tone in her voice when she said five weddings, three deaths. Is that where the Neighbours viewers are at. They're all such sick fuss that they just know they love a good death. We're gonna jam three in the one week.

Also is the other deaths at the weddings.

I don't know what I didn't watch last week. I couldn't tell you what happened.

I really want to get someone who watched to explain what happened. Five weddings is a lot.

I'll tell you what would have been enough to draw me over the line, because the best thing about Neighbors is not the weddings or the deaths. To me, I used to love the bloody cat fights. There were so many. The neighbour's bickering was my favorite part of the show. I've actually brought a couple of my favorites with me as a bit of a throwback. So this one, the first one I'm going to show you, happened between Rebecca and Lynn. Of course, so Paul Robinson's current wife and

I thought you were still at the reception.

Anyway, Look those roots are exposed now. I patted them years ago. I don't live here anymore, pleasen't do me. I live here, this is my garden.

I don't want you anywhere, all right.

Calm down, I am going but this is not your house? Actually?

Is it?

Literally?

Two grown women just punching on, rolling around in the mud having a fight. I was like, this is brilliant television.

Why was that her dig like, you're with my husband, he's ship in the bed. No, she just said those petunias water, that's that's not a disc at all.

And you know, the woman that played Rebecca on Neighbors ended up becoming a radio announcer at Kiss. I'm very disappointed that our paths never crossed. Who is this Jane Hall? Oh?

Yes, I would have loved to have just run.

Into her in the hallway and congratulated her on that performance.

Brother, do you think if you quoted that she'd know.

Or what she'd be like? Oh, yes, one of my best.

So the backstory is she moved in with the husband and obviously he's living in the house that that woman once lived in.

Yes, Jesus I assume. So that's hardly important. The fight was the best big.

Why are they there so briefly after the after the wedding, Go and relax, honey.

Evenon couldn't tell you this is going way back, but clearly that part stuck with me. Now. This next one happened between Steph and Libby, two best friends. This wasn't a physical fight, just a verbal fight. So Steph slept with Libby's husband, Dan and got knocked up. But what makes that extra shit is the fact that Dan and Libby could never have kids together. You know what I'm saying.

Of course that makes perfect send.

Anyway, step and Libby fighting after Steph got knocked up to Libby's husband. Here it is, Steph, I've got to talk to Libby. No, no, no, she won't even let you in the front door.

Please go away, No, no, Steff, come up, Libby.

Someone should do something.

Good, Shabby.

I'm so sorry. I don't worry get very excuses from you. Hello, were you went together?

No?

No, we weren't together, Libby, it was just one night. You beat the one thing you would heard me the most. You're having his baby, But they like couldn't do here can be insults?

You are.

A cheap tramp and a felthy liar.

Come near me again? No clear blimmy blimmy.

See now, if they had promised something of that flavor during the thirty fifth Anniverse three week I would have been on board in a heartbeat. I'll tell you what.

The promo should have been, The cheap Tramp is back.

I love the how it would have been quite challenging for the writers. Don't you reckon trying to come up with insults that don't actually swear because of their time slot? Like curl insults at me right now without using any curse words.

Okay, because you weren't radio.

As well, you'd have to abide by the same rule, you long haired brunette bimbo. Nah, that didn't really sting at all, little sissy, you preposterous pig. I don't really know where to go, Like, it's hard to insult without swearing, Jenna, you give it a crap try you stupid stupid boys.

This Christian rock mouth.

Mouth I would have said, frog neck Jenner, look at the double chin on him.

See on.

Anyway, try harder if you want me back to though, I'm saying more cat fight, that's what we want.

You're actually right because I'm hooked after the second grab. I would watch an episode now, that's great stuff.

Important to note that Steph within her dressing gown the whole time, classic Berbia and.

What is Margot Robbie. I'm just picturing it holding a cup of tea, but with her whole palm to warm her hand. Hell always stand out of this.

No, she was like a teenager, yes, you know, the six side something and now she's like one of the biggest actresses in Hollywood. And I was like, oh, with that performance, it's a little wonder why.

Margot Robbie is so charming. When I was in La because I'm in an hour I saw, I went to Jimmy Kimmel a taping and she was the guest and like everyone in the audience was just listening to every single word. She said, Yeah, she's the queen of lapping it up. She's like, Hi. She told a story about the logis and name dropped Karl Stefanovic on the show and me and hated him, are like, this is great, but no one in the audience have meant nothing. I just laughed because she's so beautiful.

Carls.

We love Carl.

No one knew she was And what show did you say? She was on Jimmy Kimmel one of the late night shows. How do you go from watching Stephan Libby argue on the front lawn to being on Jimmy kim Very impressive her progression.

Isn't it. She's done well? All right? Ready for my agent?

Yes, hear me with it?

Here we go? Is it just me? Board games just awful?

Oh?

Yeah, they definitely are. I'm pretty sure I've used this as an egyen before. Yeah, yes, haven't I Yeah, that's his memory playing up again.

Have you have you really said this?

It was in December, I remember because it was just before Christmas.

And I was dreading going home because I was going to have to play board games with my family. And then I played a grab of Kanye West Force the Kardashians Dictionary game.

I don't even have a grab.

Oh this is so embarrassing for you.

Oh my god, I actually feel real. I feel like you know when an elderly woman wets themselves and that's that. You know that that I'm seenile now you know, I could go to the shops before, but now I'm done, you know. Or an old man forgets the name of his daughter and he goes, yeah, deep down, he goes, I'm officially over. This is the moment I'm having right now.

Have you got anything else?

I was just going to say that being quarantined, we tried to play some board games and being quarantined, well, because everyone's self isolating at home all day. You got to work and you go home, you don't go out.

You're here.

Yeah, but you've got to come to work us.

Broad self isolating is when you full on, like commit to being at home. You work from home. Obviously you might have to duck out for the shops and stuff, but yeah, you wouldn't be here if you were self isolating.

You're kidding.

No, I never kid I genuinely, so I don't know. I could be wrong, but you can't come to this office and then tell me that your self isolated.

I'm not ill. I'm just doing it to flatten the curve, as everyone.

Says, flattened the curve. Yeah, what's that.

Well, if everyone stays inside unless people are infected, and the infection rate drops, Oh right, and it flattens the curve.

Sorry, how often do you go outside?

Oh, there's no pandemic, very rarely. When there's a pandemic, even less. Shit, Well, there you go.

The Coronavirus Free show was going really well.

Just crist Well, I have nothing else to say.

Can I tell you something coronavirus related? Actually, you know how I was. I felt a bit bad because I was I was taking the piss out of you making light of the fact that the Miley Cyrus show you had tickets to was canceled because of coronavirus, and I went to Melbourne for it. Yes you did, but something equally devastating happened to me last week.

What happened?

So I was locked in to go along with Kyle Sandalans to his one on one interview with Katie Perry. I was going to film it. I've worked with Kyle and duckire for three years, two or three years, and I've never won Scott in a photo with any of their SLIB guests. I was like, this is going to be the first time I do it. This is going to be the time I do it. I'm going to get a photo with blood Katy Perry. I was beside myself. You know how much I love Katie Perry.

You're a massive fan. You made as drink her Briggs.

What was that her drag apple side of chal She tells me that's right, yeah, you remember that.

Works.

That was longer ago. But anyway, because she apparently came into contact with someone who was suspected of having maybe coronavirus or they were being tested or something like that, she ended up just calling off all interviews and then going back to the States, I think. But yeah, that was devastating.

Katy Perry didn't have the interview, and you didn't get to meet her either.

No shit, Mitch, no devastating.

That was a better rigim than mine. Jesus Christ.

Include the mites are very needy, so make sure you leave a review on your podcast app.

I can't think of anything nice to say. Just hit five stars and let them know what's currently on your left.

I actually saw a review speaking of I'm getting quite a few, which is good. I mean, we do buddy beg.

For them, feeling like, oh, we should be getting a few.

Homeless person in the Vatican City. We got one from just your average jazz so obviously a musical theater gay person. Fucking hilarious is the title of the review. Nice very fun stumbled upon this beast of a potty one drizzly Thursday whilst enjoying a Fitzbow bowl of corn cheese the mega cheese kind what paired with Cole's finest jar of home brand salsa boy and my glad I did what a laugh spelled la double f Cheers for the public Loles team keeping coming with shackers.

Obviously, people who listen on Spotify or iHeartRadio anywhere outside of Apple podcasts are unable to leave reviews. Apparently it's not an option. But if you have just filled with overwhelming positive feedback that you'd love to leave, you just must get it out of your system. You can leave a review on our Facebook page because that would.

Be helpful to Yeah, it'd be lovely.

Now. I know I said that it was going to be a corona for his own briefly, but I am going to carry on with the corona chat because you might remember, obviously we've not been taking the issue terribly seriously on this show. Have we th No, we have. We've been making light of it.

Of course, someone tweeted out to you. Did you see what they tweeted? No, they quoted your podcast and you retweeted it your podcast look like I'm not on it.

Yeah, this is like when like father's distance themselves your daughter.

You wanted a girl here it is pop some head pop quote. Did you pop some hand sanitizer on and get to the fucking flight?

There we go? Exactly. That's that's that's exactly how seriously we were taking the issue. You might also remember you made the point you were like, oh, well, if any of us get coronavirus will be fine, and we were all like, oh, okay, it's not a problem. They're not a problem. Well, I saw a tweet and I want to let I want to see if it makes you

No, and I'll agree. But to be honest, last week when we recorded, things were drastically.

Different, like and things have really escalated, and.

Seven days so much has changed. I got on a flight to Melbourne and thought it would be fine, and three days later you can't get on a domestic flight anymore. With they canceled ninety percent of flights until they Virgin shut down. You can.

I think that was international though, was it not a domestic Virgin international? There you go?

Okay, Well, still no one's bloody flying. People are getting more and more infected.

I'll tell you what. I've realized how slack I've been with the hygiene as well, because the other day I was driving home from the gym biting my nails, and I was like, I didn't wash my hands off of the gym. I was like, I'm bloody asking for it, aren't I? Yeah, And I realized it's after seeing that tweet. I was like, damn, okay, this is the hygiene thing. It's not just me that that is endangering. I could touch something that someone who's vulnerable then touches it, et cetera,

My hands are like bone dry from sanitizer. I had a little mini tub that I attached to my belt that I would wear around the office and ran out. So I saw on TikTok to you know the automatic ones on the wall and you put your hand under it. Guess yeah, I've refilled mine from going in and out under this.

It's smart.

It took fifteen minutes, but we got there in the end and the aim was off. It went all over the floor. But I'm topped up with hand Center totally.

It's easy for people our age. I would say that most of our listeners are in their twenties. Plenty people outside of that bracket, but that's fine. But I would say majority in their twenties like us. It's easy to think that it doesn't really affect us. But I'll tell

Know, and be a gene or whatever they call.

And then obviously, actually I've got to I'll find the grab of it. I'm just going to let's pause recording. I'm going to find the words. All right, we're back, We're unpaused. I've just found what Scott Morrison said, word for word. Can you play it here?

It is, do not travel abroad, do not go overseas. That is a very clear instruction for those of you who are thinking of going overseas in the school holidays. Don't don't go overseas.

So there's bloody Petho with his resignation letter in my hand and his bloody neck pillow for the flight, and the other going, oh shit, no job to go to.

Should we get him in here and ask him how he's feeling.

I think we've got a sup harassing the stuff. We're just doing their job.

Here.

We can we dragged famine last week. We're in this in here like a fish tank.

Come in? Can you hear me?

Come?

I can broadcast. I just pressed a button in here that said come in. He's walking in.

Oh, like a loud speaker at a school. PATHO to the office, please, path to the office.

Pathod of the sick Bay, Pod of the sick Bay. I love the sick bab. He's coming in. I'll turn his mic on. Welcome, take a seat now. Can I just say, Pethos a long time listening of the show, is that right?

Man number one? Take a holder of the show.

He actually critiques flatter. He critiqued us last week he said show was great, bit long?

Went for what you know?

Is that the one where I was injured and couldn't edit?

Yeah, yeah, that was way too long.

Yeah, I agree that, peth I tell everyone what you do at Kiss.

I did I run the show at Kiss Operations and on air and out Kiss when fills in for my show and Amanda, yeah.

That ship show?

Yeah, having sleep the other week?

Same.

I feel bad bringing this up because literally all I ever hear people say to pat them in the hallways. Oh mate, what does this mean for your trip? Anyway? What does it mean for your trip? And I want to hear that bloody scomo thing. This must just absolutely make your head.

Poor thing travel abroad.

Do not go overseas. That is a very clear instruction for those of you who are thinking of going overseas in the school holidays. Don't don't go over seas.

Basically named you.

If you're a twenty four year old balden man.

From miss Surrey Hill from who.

Works in broadcasting and who hasn't slept with people in a while, tripling wild never Virgins represent right.

Yeah, were you already planning to cancel it?

Not until the start of the week Sunday I decided to cancel.

Yeah, it's been this week that it's kind of amped up your.

Poor thing, Peth. So have you booked flights?

Booked flights? Oh, I didn't know that part booked flights Visa. I'm three k down at the minute. Hopefully do they refund that ship fly? I'm hoping so BECAUSECO has told them, yeah, you can't fly, So I'm hoping I get that visa. I'm not sure yet, but.

Bloody so you've resigned. Have you asked for a jump back?

Allegedly I have, but I can't confirm that a secret, but hopefully by the time this podcast is out, I can confirm.

We'll post it.

Okay, it's more awkward resigning or unresigning.

I'm resigning. And they'd been in the works for a while. My boss said all week, you want to take that back, buddy, you want to take that back.

Oh well, that's good because I'm hearing all these stories about like freelancers who have been completely fucked by the fact that everything's shutting down. There's no event work, there's no hospitality work, there's no musicians and videography and stuff, theater shows that all work on a freelance basis. It's like, bloody hell.

The saddest thing is the kid I was training to take my job. He doesn't know that. The poor guy's gonna have to tell his missus on the streets. You in to rip up that least chair.

It's not funny. We're not going to name them. Do you think do you think it's actually bad? Though? Like if you went, would you be fucked?

You have to stay in quarantine for two weeks if you got there anyone.

Yeah, this is the problem, right, if you go there two weeks quarantine. I want to work, No one's going to hire in this climate. I can't get a job. So my other option is to keep traveling. But every country you go to is two weeks in quarantine. How was Spain, Oh yeah, great hotel room, yeah, exactly right. And how it was Germany? Yeah yeah, great, restaurants closed.

Was literally spinning out with all the possible like flow on effects like Jenna, Remember how we did that dreadful European Kentucky. Everyone, if you're listening and thinking of going on k Corona, so I don't do it. It's dreadful. It's like a high school excursion anyway. Yeah, the Kentiki thing that couldn't happen because they drive country to country in the space of a few days.

Oh yeah, I just think he should be canceled altogether.

Imagine all the basic white girls sobbing into their parents' money.

Nah, what a waste of a selfistic purchase. That was all I've done a kiking. I loved it. I really enjoyed it. Really, Yeah, I was nineteen, went around the states down the southn't gay at that point, so no one wanted to bash me. I couldn't go back. Now, will please come back and give us an update next week We'll post a little.

Static carn't wait to come back.

We could employ you here. I mean, Jenna does jack ship nothing feeling for her.

Jena's my favorite part of the show. Actually, thank you.

We're pretty lucky though, because I don't have anyone that's been affected by its far other than the ripple effect. No, that's the thing.

It has affected me officially today. I remember I told you we could he's got her.

But I'm like, oh shit, did I thtrock an Earth?

No? No, no. Today I had to say my last official goodbye to my grandma because I can't see her for the foreseeable future because she's eighty nine and in that age bracket that is severely at risk. And the thing has lived in isolation for ten years in her house do you mean with a cat? Because my grandfather died ten years ago. She's been on her own in

Do you think she would have been better off just still.

Staying at Hame? But the Pines as it's called, they don't call it a retirement village. It's called the Pines. I mean it's a retirement village. They all shit themselves. It's a retirement village. And they called my mom and they're like, you have to come in and say goodbye. Is one person has to be written down as like the visitor, and no one else can visit until it's all cleared, because six months, it could be six months.

You with the one person no as of Friday, the last person she saw that lady.

All the family went in and was.

Like they say, when you say goodbye, you don't mean like goodbye good for the type being.

It's like, we're not going to be able to see you for a long time, and she just can't fucking FaceTime. So when I'm not going to see her for a couple of months, I think, what did you.

Say to her? I can't imagine being in that scenario.

I would be so awkward, she said. She said, it's all a hoax, none of it's real. And I said it's all fake.

She went, Alan Jones is Alan Jones says everyone.

Is blowing it out of proportion. Alan Jones is in isolation in a mansion in the Northern Beaches, like petrified of it. Just of course he's saying that. She said, if Alan tells me that we need to worry, then I'll start worrying. So she doesn't give a ship.

Well, as an anti vaxxer, I also believe shit it's not real. Doesn't believe it's not real, but it's fun.

Really has Well one of the producers of Jones and Amanda, those four people where I work. Well, her dad has coronavirus.

Really, yes, so she can't see her father.

So has she had contact with her dad?

Well, he's in Adelaide, Ah, so she's fine.

But her dad's partner doesn't have it.

You're kidding and now we're together. Wow, isn't that interesting.

I just don't understand all of it. It's it's all too much to get my head around.

Also, some people are like, I've got zero symptoms, and then on Twitter someone's like I can't breathe and I'm bleeding out of my eyeballs. It's like, where's the middle ground.

The happiest person is Christian Wilkins because he's got the most pr ever anyone. Oh yeah, give it to me.

He used to be on Dancing With Now is the start. It's weird times, very weird. Anyway, key change the union, jack or something. But yeah, fridgematic.

Trip, but you're not going Yeah, don't bring that up.

Sorry mate, It must really fuck up your life too much. You know, you're in and out of LA. Can't be out of the real.

Yeah, we should go up and low mate, fin see.

You don't want that?

What are you talking about? Out of here? Say your buddy. He's so nice.

Wow for someone who started the show saying we weren't going to talk about coronavirus so far other than neighbors, that's all we've spoken about.

If we promoted it like Neighbors did, it would be four friends, one life ruined, one grandmother in peril.

Imagine dropping all that money on an overseas trip and then having it just be canceled out of your control. At least least if he'd made the decision to cancel it, it would be like, Okay, it was my decision. I'm in control here. But the fact that it was like just banned for him, Oh, that would ship me off.

Something chronic, although he is honestly fine.

Well, yeah, you know, coronavirus is the world's way of saying, don't go Pether.

Yeah, we actually love Pether because he think Pether.

Is possibly the only person in the office. I don't know why I'm saying, well, this is like while he's not here, but I reckon he's the only person in the office that I've never heard anyone bitch about me too, just the nest the one that I like.

Is genuinely. I said this to Hayden, I've said this to my parents. Like I do my show at night, and I do it on my own, and honestly, you know, I have no team working for me, so sometimes I've got to do a million things at once.

As much as I got you working for you know.

I know we like to say that I don't do anything, but I could not do my show without him helps me so much. I call him at midnight some nights, being like, Hi, Pfel, I've accidentally deleted Stupid Lot by Lady Gaga. Yeah, someone requested that song last night and they used her real name, Stephanie George and Sharnie whatever.

It's called, Stephanie Joe and Angelina German.

She was trying to be funny. I'm like, you have a song request She's like, yeah, can you play Stephanie German German? And I was like who, and then she said Gaga had a bit of a laugh. Well that's not fucking funny.

Probably you What are you doing over there?

I just looped.

Oh, I've just noticed that you're paneling. Sorry, clearly my inner carm's gone. I've just noticed your Your paneling has been so chaotic recently.

What do you mean? I just would?

Am I wrong? Because I feel like I've noticed in the opener you've been like writing the fader up, turning the volume up, and then turning it down and then turning it up in the Is that if you're doing doing that on purpose? Or am I imagining it my new thing? Is it your new thing?

Yeah?

I do an example?

Okay, So do you have a good joke? Everyone just laughs yeah, and then Jenna said she actually likes Jonesy you go down?

Is that what you've been doing? Because I've just noticed when I've listened back a couple of times, why does the music keep getting louder and quieter?

Because sometimes when jem say something ridiculous.

Jenna, you're dumb, poor, down right? And then I see, So it's for a fact, I just feel like sometimes the comic timing is not there. I'm sorry to be a cunt. Let me let me show you, let me show you. You're gonna do it to me?

Yeah, okay, okay, I'm gonna move to your desk. Don't pull me.

I just listened to back a couple of which one is it again?

The one that's on and app so number I think it's number two headphones? Do you think you are Steve Aoki?

So here we are. I'm on the panel now. But I just noticed a couple of times that you do it, it gets louder and quieter. But I think you miss the comic timing. So let's just say I'm telling a joke. This is what it should be. Okay, Hey, guys, why did the chicken cross the road? Why to get to the other side, you go like this. When you do it, you're like, hey, guys, why did a chicken across the road? And I'm like I was like that, Why does it keep dropping in and out? Is there something wrong?

Jenna? Do you agree? And be honest?

Do I do that?

You do?

Oh?

Well, you fucking panel the show. I'm here now you can do the rest of the show from mare. Well we're finished, so we don't know how to.

Activate live tweets or all right, that's all we've got time for what you just sounded like me?

It finished the ridiculous listening for another week.

It's been a great show, he hasn't. It's a really good show. It's been a tight show. Thirty minutes tops.

That's what it's meant to be, very true.

Beg god, Bethos, good, isn't it? You've left your phone on looked to hear. What can I do? I'm trying to wrap de Can you your tweet from Lady Gaga?

What is it? I've got her notification?

I'm untalented. Hey, she's self quarantining? Is she She's got a massive fucking no. She'd breathe in coronavirus from will Hunt just once breathe in and she's got it, got a big old mars.

Okay, here's microsoft. No more of that nonsense. Do you even know episode twenty? I think this is episode twenty?

Is it? Yeah?

I just turned the wall off except mine. That's how it should be. Thanks for listening, guys. We'll be back next week. Bye bye?

Is it just me?

Don't forget to subscribe and leave a review on your podcast up.

Welcome to ad Deef. This is our secret segment. I can't believeth to the secret segment. Oh, I mentioned it while I was in here.

Do you know what is my mic on?

Yes, I've taken my phone.

I've taken my ephones out in protest. I you know what you can?

Sorry on?

I have something to say to.

Horry you on Helle anyway, add brief is our secret segment. We hope to trick people out of listening because usually the first half of the show, like the actual show, was something that we put thought into and prepare and we're relatively you know, we want to we want people to listen, but this part is completely rogue and unprepared and it's not our best way. I try and trick people out of listening. But that show was probably the most rogue we've ever gone.

There was a lot of emotion about my grandma.

I talked about neighbors. You didn't do an in gym.

It was an antigym, and they're probably more entertaining than if I did bring one. Yeah, I can't believe I genuinely, you know. I was at home playing a board game the other day and I thought, this is my agem and it never once occurred to me that we've already done it. Yeah, right, isn't it weird? What sticks in my mind and what doesn't? It is very odd, like I remember so many niche memories, like what like when you and I first met for the very first time.

It's so false.

And I went no, and I went, Jenna, I'll drop you. Remember I didn't catch the bus. You said, what were you going to do?

Catch the track?

Oh? Really? Pull my story apart.

You got the wrong public transfer and.

I dropped you home and we had a great bonding session. And you lived in a mansion in the near the ocean. Vore clues or something?

Wrong?

Where did you live?

Not in a mansion.

It's a beautiful house. You've got gates out the front.

Wrong.

I don't know about that. I had a guard dog bark and rot like it was a flower power.

Like greyhound doesn't know how to butt?

Really?

What if you debarked? It? Cruelty into animals? Anyway, Mitch, what are you doing over there?

Much?

What about you?

You have an activator live tweets, You've got to activate them.

I refuse, there's no such thing. Well, I'm trying to maintain my inner calm.

Please, okay, can you teach us? Why don't we do another episode of guest Yoga and see who wants to gues yoka? Yeah?

Because last week I got in another episode.

Buttros was our mentor last week and this week.

Maybe that was a few weeks ago, but your memory, it's fine.

Supporo Saphora this week?

How do I find okay? So, anyone who's new here, this is exactly the sort of thing I'm talking about when I say we go rogue, and I'm not proud of it. We ended up somehow doing an impression of what it would be like if Ida Buttos was the voiceover for a meditation.

No, you know where it came from? My memory? Again? Weird how I remember this. I saw her at Marti Gras tunnel vision, directly on Ida Buttros's wig, and I looked at you and said, there's Eider and then we just went down that garden path.

Because it's it. And that's not the same music.

It's very similar. It should be on our wall.

Oh is this our war Joga music? I searched meditation era?

It's my era. Should I give us someone? I can't do impressions though Mitch is greater impressions. I can't.

Who do you want me to do? This way?

What a bad think?

It's fun if we plan it. I feel like I it was only fun because it was spontaneous.

Give it a go. It's like that time we did jingles and we had to do ads and they were very funny. Then we tried to do it again, and.

Where's the bloody yoga music. It's not on your.

We'll just search yoga music and you'll get it.

You said it was on the wall.

Who can we do? Jenna Sarah Harris know someone with a unique voice, but Chose's lisp really stands out.

I'm made about truth, I am made about jas Okay, there's a few here.

Curing the current coronavirus grass. I'm wearing pads you can buy the way you'd be a proth bad.

Yeah, this is it, This is it?

A rattlesnake at the stars, Tray Grimshaw tonight, No, I can't.

What would she say in a meditation?

Sandra Sally?

Oh, God, good evening, tonight, work play stress, playing on your mind? Is that guy ever gonna text you back? Or are you kidding yourself? All that still to come and still to escape your brain? Unsaid for Sally. Welcome to this meditation. Now we begin our meditation. God, I don't even know what she said. Follow my Instagram at short black that's what it's called. I always every time Sandra Sally posts something on Instagram, because of course I

And coffee order. She's not even a black woman.

And sure it's the name of her podcast, is it? Yeah?

God, she's smart. I don't love to get her on as a guest.

We'll make it happen. Dude, what do you think I'm receiving reports that you're struggling to sleep. We cross life now to this meditation in order to lull you there. Let's begin with breathing in. Thank you. Now, when we begin with breathing out, and for our next in hell, we cross life to Tim Bailey.

Tim Hexandra, I'm about here, got you made with a suddenly coming through sunshine tomorrow Sunday, Sunday, honey, bright skies.

And blue suns across the country. Tim Bailey Live from the chop Up back to Uxandra.

Thanks Tim. Now we're having some intrusive deep self doubt trickling through. I don't really know where to go from there.

Oh my god. Tim Bailey needs to calm down.

For those who aren't in Sydney. Tim Bailey is like this pint size weather man that used to be out of the road all the time and now he's just got the Daily Bailey Weatherwall or some shit. He's always in studio.

I'm like when he's at school, he's scorched by the sun and he looks like a date. Can you google Tim Bailey loses it on it? Go to the web? Do you know how to do that?

Yes?

Up to the web favor web faber, up the web fader. I went to after Have you seen him lose it? It's so funny.

Tim Bailey trying to find a pair. You just want to sit back here. I'm over it. You do it.

He buckled under the pressure.

There's no pressure.

Really, I'm much better at it anyway. I prefer to do it so and thank God that you're back because I can. Finally, it's under the desk the button to do it officially live tweets active.

Quite late in the show for us to do it here we gots is coming through.

Because we had me to oh my god, stop stuff stop there we go.

That we should go guys, Yeah we shouldn't.

I think that's idea.

I'm getting Tim Bailey freaks out on the air. All right, Tim, but I love about you. Google Tim Bailey loses it.

That's what you told me to look up word for the world.

I don't think I said that.

Hey, can you turn me up? Because I turned you down when you're on this manch did you because you're louder? Here we go.

We did television Bloopers and that was one of our most few videos when Paul Lee, remember Lee didn't get that, didn't get the I g a voucher. We should do some more just brainstorming on the air.

And you know how I said that the show we did the other week with which Mitch was our worst show. Yeah, I think this might have a clips it really so? Oh what's that the timer that says we've gone on too long?

Okay, well it's been a pleasure. Are we going to hear that? I can't find it. I didn't set one. I'm gonna keep going.

I've had to start. I've started setting timers to say how long it's been, like, so when we should wrap the show because we always go over and then I have to cut certain things to make it the right length, because, as Petho pointed, out quite rightly. It was too long that week that I couldn't edit.

Ah, you're such a knock I agree, What do you such a knock? A knock? Well?

Am I not?

I don't get it.

Oh, because we're just going on. I'm having a bit of fun. People love it. If people don't want to listen, they can turn off. Am I right, Guys, send us a tweet if you're listening live and you want us to keep going.

Yeah. But I also think that it's just like it's taking the piss, putting this out in the world and being like, here you go, this is what we have to offer. Yeah, people not good content?

Yeah, probably right. Well, I started the show with the Purge siren, and it's officially over. Purge is done. Okay, how would you go in the Purge? I reckon, you'd be great. So I'm gonna come at you with a go no no, no, mad not may Dallan. Someone's in the house next door, you take them him in the bath.

It's the Purge that it's that movie where it's for twenty four hours that no laws, including murder apply, so people just go around killing people and stuff. Jenna would be fucking element.

My God, that's Jenna's Christmas bring. Would you what would you got? Would you attack to be to hide or would you just hunt? Would you go kill?

I'd kill you, you would not.

I don't have anyone that I dislike enough that I need to kill them. I reckon I'd just find a sick hiding spot and just outwit everyone, outwit, you know, like outsmart though.

Yeah, I know, I know. I just thought that was quite funny.

Well, you know I've got I'm renowned for my wish you are spelt with a double live course because of my workplace.

ID alright, guys, Well before we go, Jenna told me before the show started that she had something she wanted to tell us. So, Jenna, you've got the stage make the announcement.

I never said that, Jenna, I never said that.

Well, I'll tell you. I saw Jenna in the bathroom taking a pregnancy.

Test, so you were in the female bar.

What I was looking through the male was blocked up, So I used the girls. Also because the cubicle stores are wider, man, I need the extra width.

Why would they be wider? And the girls for their hips, for birthing, for all the people that give birth in the radio station bathroom, and I walked in and all I.

Could hear is this, and I thought, I know that sound from all the girls that I've knocked up. That's a pregnancy sticky. So I look over the cubicle. I see Jenna squatting. You looked over the cue and she said, she said, please don't tell me to let me announce him on the show. And I said, go for it. So Jenna has your time tell him.

Yeah, you made up that whole story.

You're not pregnant. Never happened. There you go, Well, let's get out of here. That's the opener. Sorry, want a mess?

Oh yeah, I need it that way.

Why am I even here?

If you were pregnant, would you announce it on the show? Nor Im'm gonna kill you?

She wouldn't, as she would.

She's got a ticket to look after.

It's Tiger.

Now.

I'd like to propose something to you, Mitchell. This is actually I know that we keep our iGEM's secret from each other until the day. But you were just talking about Jenna being pregnant and stuff, and I thought of an I gem on the fly. But it does require some homework from both of us. Okay, I was gonna say, is it just me or do the titles of pornography seem perfectly normal in the moment, but then in hindsight, when you think back, you think, why did I click

Also, it's always after you, you know, like finish that, and I don't know if it's you, but I've got like maybe six tabs going and then I have to delete my tab one by one and I'm like, I was mentally wanting to watch that. That was like next up in my queue.

Why was I know you and you're like, oh god, do you do that?

So I scroll through the feed and I go open a new tab, open a new tab, open a new tab, and then once I'm like ten seconds through ago and no, this isn't doing anything, so I go to the next one.

Yeah, yeah, I do that too. It's been a real problem with the Internet at the moment too. Why because I don't know why I think that. I don't know if it's got anything to do with the bloody everyone working from home, nice sleeping. I don't know I've got anything to do with that, but I feel like your internet's been really shitting the last week with all the pandemic.

Everyone's working from home, so the grids, Yeah, that NBN's being tested, Jenna, that's not how I pointed that taught you to.

Can you think of in the moment, a weird one that you've watched, oh, the.

Ones that always freaked me out, or whether it's like the Daddy ones. I don't like the Daddy, but it's like Daddy does this too, Like it's creepy.

Okay, maybe I won't use this as an ead gym because I may to talk about it now, but I remember seeing there was a video, and then I scrolled a bit further and the exact same video appeared, but they changed it from like just two normal people to like stepfather or something like that. And I was like, and I was talking to one of the girls I do Schneitdy Committee with about this, and they were like, yeah,

Maybe is a simple set upline at the start? But thanks mate, I know it's hard on you, but me, I really love your mum anyway, bend over, Like, what what could they say start to set that up? Mate? I know your dad normally drives you to baseball, but I'll do it today. Also, pants off. I'm just saying, you know what, I reckon the actors.

I don't think I could possibly talk about I changed my mind. I'm not talking about this in the main show why too much? And yet like I'm hoping to trick people that are listening to this, including family members. They don't need to know about what porn hold.

Your families don't listen to this, do that. I don't get this far. Your sister congratulations, pregnant or something? What? When does something happen? She put something an announcement on Facebook, and I congratulated her. Her baby got got its christening or something? I swear?

Did she named the baby when it was something that happened with your She's got a three year old and a one year old. They're both named.

Did it say it's first words?

No?

Shit?

Well, were we talking about Jenne? Do you remember before the pawn?

No?

It was the pawn? And then I said, oh I hope that my I can't talk about this in the main show.

Oh well, then let's talk about it about it now. I don't search anything in porn, you know what I do. I go to the category that I like, which is you know, well it's not interosexual, and I just scroll until I find something, and I go by thumbnail. Also, paorn set the standard you know on YouTube when you like go over a thumbnail and it starts playing, but you haven't clicked it yet, so it sort of shows you highlines Paorn led the charge on that. Yeah, dude, Paun was doing that years ago.

No preview available.

I'm like, what do you mean, Yeah, bullshit.

Yeah, that's you're asking me to invest a lot of trust in this video.

Right by one still image. Please come on pork and.

Someone else anyway, Jenna, what sort of porn do you like?

Yeah, I'm too busy.

Please, You're never too busy for a bit of bit.

Of fun, especially during the whole quarantine. Jesus Christ, I thought my thing was going to fall off last Thursday.

Oh god, I'm just joking.

Actually, haven't been too busy.

So other than other than step Son, than step farthers and et cetera. What what titles have you felt guilty for clicking on?

I always feel guilty when I click on an amateure one because I'm like, maybe they didn't want this out there. You know, they seem like a lovely.

Couple, Like No, I think they make them look amateur on purpose, because some people prefer that.

Really, I think that must be where I go because I watch it and then I'm like, maybe he's doing it without that consent of the partner. But then they always look at the camera and do things like yeah, you know what I mean. You can always tell when it's a production company behind the amateurre one because then they look at the camera and they say buzzwords like you know film me.

It's like no one, yeah, no one, Like they're reading cards off the camera.

Yeah, like Ellen, do want to give back reading Q cards? I like amateurre What else is there that? Nothing really irks me? It's always a brother thing, Like a lot of gay porn is always like my step brother after school.

What is it about that, like just two people? It's not they're not. Actually they never allude to the fact that, oh, yeah, yeah, my brother, I think it is. I think it's you know how some people get that thrill out of doing things in public, like you know, sex in a park or like some people I know, like female friends of mine, have said that they love if they're on a bus, they'll just do a sneaky like fiddle a little bit of you're kidding, They'll like do a little bit of

But why kind have you ever done anything publicly with a person?

No? Really definitely wouldn't be against them anyway.

Interesting, So.

It's the it's the it's the whole factor of this isn't meant to be happening, and you know it's wrong. I think that's why people click on those videos where it's like, oh, you know, fucking siblings.

You know, the ones that get me and I often click on it, but I never make it to them. They're always like nights in the tabs. It's like Mormon Pasta teaches biblical you know, student a lesson.

No, Mormon boys is one of my favorite.

Is it really?

They wear the Yeah, they wear the Hessian clot No, I don't like. I don't like the one where it's the like the pasta, like their senior leader. But if it's like the the dorm mates, you know.

Yeah, anyway, the dorm mates. Do you think we should play like a warning for what you know, it's a sexy chat.

It's happened already, yeah, said, I like Mormon Boy. That's my favorite porname channel, like, we're not my favorite, Jenn know what about you has already?

This is.

Sorry. I thought that was going to be a warning thing. So Jenna, surely you watch though, No, have you.

Ever probably have you seen Two Girls, One Car?

Oh, that's inappropriate.

Can we make Jenner watch Two Girls, One Cup for the first time?

I'm not I would never do that to you, Jenna.

Jenna, I think you should listen. You bailed out on getting Hayden's reaction to Miley's cancelation last week. Give me something.

Well, we've got Maggie on the line. Maggie, you watch Stepdaddy porn? Did you enjoy it? Talk to me?

Yeah, it's so amazing.

Here was incredible.

They go, So she's into it. Wow. What about Grace? Grace, you and your boyfriend watch Mormon porn as well? Talk to me about the vibe. How do you all enjoy watching it?

Yeah?

A couple of times, they go, they watched it a couple of times.

I'm trying to find it. Sorry, that's fine for anyone who doesn't know. Two Girls, One Cup is like the most like everyone in high school. It's something that people would watch. It's like the most infamous porner ever, because it's just you can't even describe what's happening.

I don't want to, could you? I'm not.

I didn't say you're going to watch It's not all about you, Dallan.

What's my show just as much it is yours.

I'm making Jenna watch it.

Keep up? Are you really wanting to watch this, Jenna? Yeah?

I want to know what it is.

We've got Lucy. Lucy, you watched the last week for the first time.

To you like it?

He was incredible. She liked it?

So how do you find it?

I used to watch my friends like Google meat Spin and I google it and it was a man swinging his penis round and the X to exit the web page would bounce around the screen. So me with my little preppy beescent mouse was like quick enough. I could never get it. So I just reboot the whole me right round Baby. Then I finally erased it from my memory. Then I watched the Hangover movie and that song played in the credits, and now I could think of was giant swinging Dick. I want to enjoy the movie? Is

Can I put that out to the three guys in the office if.

You just hit producer on your machine.

And really, I've had this option to be like the loudspeaker in school this whole time. Gentlemen, where would I find two girls one carp It's important, don't they're busy working on kids. Don't laugh. I'm furious YouTube Brad so bullshit.

In the meantime you search for that, We're gonna go to the phones. All right, Jenna, get the prize wheel. We'll give away some prizes. Haven't done this in a while. Okay, all right, We've got Lee in Asakana, which is on the north coast. Lee is ready to play. We got prizes for you. It's gonna be fun. So Lee, give a spin, le guys, Jenna spinning it for you. Oh my god, six seven, eight, nine, and it's on ten. Jenna tell me what she's wine.

Oh wow, this is a good one. A roll of reusable toilet paper.

Oh well done, Lee, Congratulations. How's it reusable?

Jenna? They just cloth like sheets of cloth. Okay, we're gonna go to Bruce in Maridona, Bruce, get ready, spin, buddy, Jenna, given this well dark? Oh? Sorry the music number three? Jannel, What do is you want?

Oh my god, this is a really good one. A trip to London which has been canned.

Brilliant done. That's great.

So technically you've won nothing there, buddy, But thanks for golling.

Oh let's do one more. Let's go to Louse cinder color just nooser nowhere, no no interesting suburbs, she's just innoser. Give the wheels, spin yet, go for her. There we go.

Oh my god, I've had safe search on this whole time.

Oh shit, hold on quickly, what's cinder one?

I am still wearing high here.

On all four feet or just an offul so not the bottom too? How easy? Fine?

Now that I don't have safe search on, I'm even on the off of swifi.

Oh Mitch, No, what safe search?

It's literally what it sounds like. It's what you'd put on your computer so your kids can't accidentally find something filthy. Okay, this is definitely it. Mit, you turn this ship off, please.

I don't want to do it.

You're not watching it.

Is Jenna, Jenna, can we get your verbal consent?

Yes, she's already done that. She hasn't do you not think it's a good idea. We don't have to.

I think it's a good idea.

I want to see what he's really advising against it.

I'm just a bit of a brood when it comes to this stuff. But if Jenna wants to do it, she can do it.

You've just talked about watching your stepfather's bang this episode, but now you're too preddy torching girls enjoy their.

Own bodily fluids show, Jenna, let's.

Go, Okay, let's do it. Here you go, Jenna, Oh goodness, I feel very uncomfortable.

All right? You ready for it?

Yes? Wait, I've got to film this surely our instagram at couple of mitches? Yeah you.

Someone help her?

She's reaching, like dry reaching.

What's this music? She's crying. Jenna's now crying, Oh what's happening here? Or what part is not too? This music sounds like the Sims loading music.

Jenna's crying, Oh god, is this music?

Sounds like they're in the Pokemon Center. Stop but this is cruel. Get rid of it.

That's enough, okay to no.

No more of this? Are you okay?

Jenna?

Why don't you explain what those two girls did.

What if the body I didn't vomited into each other's mouth.

Yeah, that's in a nutshell. Really, the two girls one cup full of like not very high fiber dump with money, and then they started drinking and then spitting into each other's mouth, and then they started making to other vomit in which it's revolting. I didn't. I didn't expect that.

What did you think it was gonna happen? They're going to show a glass of iced water.

No, I thought they were doing something with a cup having a pest.

She thought they were a girl. She thought they were just about to that. She'd start the video and then you'd hear I thought it was the cup song Paul little JJ. No, that's equal matter.

We should definitely I have played this close of four.

Times in this show. Yeah, feel sick, Jenna. You need a better dean on the eyeballs. And we need to assess our lives, Mitch.

Do we need to with our lives?

Because we did a lot of dirty talk this episode. People want to remember we asked on like episode three, we're very keen to get sexy, and we asked, if you want what if you want to if you want an X rated version of the show, d m us and we got that. We've got a lot of d ms asking for it. Why do we never do that?

I don't know.

I think it was a bit creepy.

It's a bit forced to be like, hello, guys, welcome to the show. We've set aside some time to talk about our sex. Yea, no, that's what the Sydney Gaze did.

Also, that was very much like which Mitch, which wasn't crafted right, which Jenna takes for credit for. But that was sort of just a compliment sesh, which I'm not into.

I was thinking about that afterwards because anyone who didn't listen to episode eighteen, I think it was we did which Mitch anonymous compliments, we have to guess which Mitch it applies to, and it tanked because all the compliments, it was really obvious who they applied to. There was no mystery or debate. Yeah, and we were like joking blameing Jenna, and then I realized that Jenna doesn't have the password to our Instagram, so she had to get

We really need to wrap up.

We've been going on from you're a radio professional and you let that happen. Obviously haven't listened to my show at night because it's a train run. Surely sent me all the message.

I see you next week, chat in.

Is it just me?

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