#186: The Big Pitch

Is it just really stood by a couple of mitches. Hell yeah, a lese yourself for the rude shocks of young adults. You want to know a crazy fact that I had a bio scan done at my gym this week. I've gone from thirty nine percent body fat to twenty four when last week?

No?

When did I ask?

No? He is Michulli and Mitchell cous holl are you hello? Are you hello?

Listen her?

Well?

No?

What right off the bat? Yeah, I'm under obligation to issue a public apology.

Oh, it's wrong based.

Off last week's episode on Wednesday.

Bit of a manic one. Yeah, remember how.

We were talking about your new boy. Oh, yes, we were, and we were talking about, you know, his age, and how you should make no apology for it, just say it matter of factly correct. And then I said, ask me how old Shawn is?

Yep, I said thirty two? You did, He's not thirty two.

Oh.

He was so furious when you said that. I remember thinking, fuck his age.

I don't know where that came from. He's only thirty one.

Oh and he listens every week, he does. Oh, Shawney, he was.

Going to write a season desist email with his fucking Parliament letterhead.

Oh yeah, of course, Yeah, the honorable Sean.

So, just for those wondering, he's still thirty one, not thirty two till November.

I want no There is no one on this planet that I want no harm done to less than him. Do that makes sense? I don't know. I don't want him to be harmed. I love shot.

If you had to harm everyone on planet Earth, he'd be last on the list.

Yes, correct, Like I would harm, You'd sacrifice any old arsehole ahead of him. I'd punch a twelve year old in the face before I punch Sean. No younger, but there's an age joker couldn't make about the new boy, but I won't. He's twenty one, and he's twenty two in a couple months. This is the whole conversation. Pitch. Okay, So and you said twenty two and a couple of months.

We don't do that. You just say it's twenty one.

Okay. Maybe it's a pitch thing, Mitch. Maybe you need to go, oh, he's twenty one.

You can say twenty one in high pitch. It's what comes after that. But it's twenty too soon. It's twenty two because it sounds like you're defensive. But if you don't believe you're doing anything wrong, then there's no needing.

I'm not doing anything wrong. I'm on your side.

Do you not understand?

No, you're right, I do. I do. I'm sorry because.

When you say it does sound like you think you're doing something wrong. But if you don't, which you're not, then fucking self apologize.

I don't squeal it.

You literally just did it. Everyone hit that rewind fifteen second button twice and you'll hear it the panic.

It's like you were talking to a court judge. Yes, twenty Yeah, you're right.

Maybe that's where I got it from the two because I said Joan's thirty two, Oh and you thought you're twenty two.

I don't know, true, but that does mean that he's exactly ten years older than your boy. Oh my god, you at all? Have they met? They haven't met a they you've met him?

Imagine the double date. Let's not tend they have anything in common.

They would have plenty in common. That's true because it's so nice. He knows how to talk, so is my guy. Mike's where dating people excuse ourselves. Yeah, seriously, they.

Could talk for hours telling now.

That I think about it, well, God forbid we bring up what happened when Sean met my last partner.

Yeah, no, God for bim, Yeah what happened?

Well, God forbids a jenny, He.

Forbids trying to stay on God's side. Yeah, we've got a few fucking sins up our sleeve. Already didn't go well, I think because the guy I'm seeing is in healthcare and he's a carer. Sean is in politics, he's helping the public. They're both givers.

Do you know?

Actually that' right very funny. That was very funny, Mitchell.

Anyway, if you're listening, Sean, I apologize. Everyone now knows that you're only thirty one.

We love you, Sean. You don't good day over God. He could pass for twenty six, I reckon. Seriously, he's got such good skin and such a thick head of hair.

You're saying you look younger than me.

Noau, I pass for you can pass the twenty one.

I better watch my background you.

I was just about to make the same joke. He's very good, Okay, hilarious, I've already told you. But does that mean when I met you in the lyft when you were nineteen. I thought I looked nine. Definitely, you're like nummies. It was your birthday that day. I never forget it. Oh you would so.

Forget my birthday.

Actually, wow, Wednesday episodes are cooked.

Yeah, we still need to come up with a catchy name for it because it got is it just me Monday? It's just pure it gems. Wednesday could be anything like today. We've got talk back tings and my big pitch, the pitch.

I still think we Wednesday and we get Janit to wear a T shirt with the nipples underneath, and we spray it with a fire.

It didn't catch on.

Not one person said do it.

No, but you're wearing white this week.

I do have big dinner plate nipples too.

You can't do it next to the radio panel. Although we're leaving some may cares if we break it now? Yeah, already and waiting isn't there?

Oh my god, I've seen a glimmer of these new studios. W gonna. I don't think we're gonna like it. Why because they're lighting the halogen globe in the see how this is an audio medium. It's done. There's a giant You've got four led lights in this studio in every corner. In the new one, there aren't any of these. There is one giant bubble. It looks like, you knowing, like.

In the middle of the room.

Yeah, that's good. No, you know in far off Queensland where water gets in the roof and then they sag and there's that giant bubble and on TikTok people poker broomstick in it. That's what it looks like. But it's it's full of led light and it just drowns your face with light.

That's not bad.

I think I'm too old for that. Twenty nine this year. Guys almost as old as Sean, which is not that old young, and he's gorgeous.

Yep.

The new studio is very soon. You might even notice a sound difference. We might sound Maybe we should do a send off for this one. Yeah, I want to just farten it up, just piss on the walls this studio. Oh no, it's been really good memories we've had in the studio. Memory Maybe take a trip down memory lane possibly, I mean, how would we do that?

Well, that's what I mean. I was like, oh, the memories, but I can't think of any off the.

Top of my head. It's also more for us, it's not for the listeners because we've been here visually.

But I will miss I mean, there's a lot of things we've done in this studio, but it could have happened anywhere.

That's very true.

True, But there's nothing special about this studio. It's actually a ship on when you think about it, Why the fuck am I sentimentally attached to this at all?

Well?

This sucks, think about it, Mitchell. That corner is where Jenna was broadcasting from a bin.

True.

That the.

Yes, you guys made me go to a funeral home to pick that thing up, and there were corps and fridges. No you often I offered to.

Go and the radio station street team car. Imagine someone pulling over and be like, can I have a free canner coke? And you're like, don't look in the back.

And then we had to store the coffin somewhere and I thought our audio producer was on holidays, but he was and he came in the next morning and there's a big coffin in his shotio.

That was good. Oh, his studio has been vere. If you haven't heard that, episode. Go back and listen to the episode where Jenna broadcast are from a coffin.

Yeah, yeah, that is one of our best. When people ask where do I start, I'm like, that's a pretty good episode.

Yeah, yeah, it is. It is. We should bring those videos back because TikTok wasn't really a thing back then. I feel like they do well.

All right, Well, put a bloody reminder in my phone for next Christmas because it was Christmas thing. Oh if we post a video where there's bables and tinsel and sit in the studio, people are going to think we're idiots.

You're right. When I think of Christmas, I think of coffin.

Yeah, me too, and beins welcome to Is it just me?

Yeah?

Every episode we start the same way. Something we've noticed, something we hate to appreciate. Mitch doesn't know my age. I don't know Mitch is now in the new era. There's gyms in every episode.

Who's going first this time?

When you went first? Last episode?

That's true.

I could just jump in Min's topical and it's something that is currently causing me in my entire family a grave deal of stress. Okay, what's yours? I guess something that's causing me a grave deal of stress. Oh god, yeah, you can't have both, Mitch, you're stressed and Jenner's perpetually just snap out of it then, no, no, no, we'll work through it. We'll both, we'll all work through it together. Yeah. Plus, yeah, you said talkback things on the episode today. Yes, and the big white pitch pitch.

Yeah, got an idea for you, and you're either going to be like fuck, yes, Mitchell, you're the best. I can't believe you've pulled this off. This is excellent. I'm on board one hundred percent, or you're going to go.

I can't be bothered.

I'm excited and it could go either way with you. Actually, before I even pitch, what's your mood like today?

It's actually pretty good. I've had a couple chocolate truffles. The iHeartRadio team send us a box of chocolates to sea. They send us Coca Bite chocolates to congratulate us on being a hit podcast.

Did so you're in a good mood?

Yeah, I had chocolate. You sound a bit tired. I'm a bit tired.

Maybe maybe today's.

Not the day. Have some coke, no sugar, no doubt, all right, then I feel a bit better. Give me with your ridge and please, sorry went down the wrong I'm not play the music.

Is it just me?

A parent's on social media? Never a good idea?

Nah, I'm all about it.

No, I like it now. My mom is not on any social media. Mom has well, mum has Instagram and she had the handle she is. She's barely on it, and I'll tell you why. Because she was sued by missus Chew, the Vietnamese restaurant. Well, she's Michelle Chury, so she had the handle miss Chew. Yeah, little did she know there's a popular Vietnamese chain in Melbourne called missus Chew.

You can't sue for that, that's just bad luck.

No, but they had it and they like put in a Mum doesn't post often, so you know, if you're maybe don't know this, but if you're a brand and you want someone else's handle, if someone else has it and it's an inactive account, they just take it from that account. So they took mum's handle from her and it went to the Vietnamese restaurant. Anyway, that's not really the problem.

Yeah, and my parents on social media. You were saying Mum's only got Instagram.

I went for a run the other day and as I was running, I wear my Apple Watch, I got notification. It was a message from an Airbnb and it said, Hi, Mitch, no Is, we can make those dates happen. I'll accept it now. Then I got a two and a half thousand dollars charge to my Westpac app. Didnt another notification?

You were't booking an Airbnb?

No, it wasn't on a run. I just came back from a trip. I'm not going anywhere, you know, I don't want going to read again. So I go what So I called marm because of course it's Michelle. So I call mom and I go, Mom, are you booking something on my Airbnb? And she went, yes, I am, I am, I'm booking an airbnb. Your Auntie Monda's coming down and she's in the wheelchair and we need wheelchair access.

Well that's kind of handy, But how did that end up happening on your credit card?

Mum?

Mum's no, because mum's iPad is signed into my Airbnb. I must have booked a trips on I don't know. I must have just logged in.

On your mom's iPad. Yeah, I'm twenty nine years old. No, this is how humiliated.

Youve been a couple of years ago. I don't know how. I don't know how to happen.

The only thing that'd be more embarrassing if it was your mum's Samsung Tamblas.

Okay, it's mum's iPad. Fucking sorry.

I didn't mean to put this back on you, and have you be embarrassed? Why were you ever logged in on your mum's eye that's a good question.

Yeah, my brother's logged in on my mom's iPad.

Thank you. There's something comforting about being I think it's so weird. No, I remember when I was going to LA on one trip because I'm in and out, I wanted to show my parents my Airbnb, and I think I had mums. I just logged in on her iPad so she could follow my trip. I'll follow my itinerary. I don't know. Some reason your family's way closer than mine. Were very close, We're very close.

It wouldn't be letting them stalk where I'm staying and stuff. If they wanted to know, I'd tell them, but I wouldn't be like track my every move.

I know the juries are very closely. So I get home and I look, it's okay, but they've put a hold of two and a half grand on my Westpac. Like, you just transfer the money, it's not a problem. Oh, good for it. Then she went, you know what's funny, though, I've realized that it's actually Trent Roberts that I went to high school with because he just sleeps the straight away.

Scammer would have that much information. No, no, but I agree it's all coming from the Airbnb app.

This was all coming from Mitchchury, so that's where she's made the error. Correct.

He's like, I don't know a Mitch Chury that went to high school with my wife. Correct, because he's twenty years younger.

But Mum just doesn't understand that you don't communicate with people like you're talking to them at the local bakery. Now on social media. It's Airbnb.

But also classic cheery shit right there, the haggling. Yeah, oh that's where you get it, mate, I look where it's gotten you.

Now, she still doesn't actually transfer me for two and a half grand I need to chase that up.

Are you ready for my a gym?

I'm ready. I'm nervous about your stress levels, Mitchell.

Oh okay, Well let's get into it.

Is it just me?

Is there an enormous difference between a good GP and a bad GP?

Oh?

My god, Yes.

There's no middle ground. You're either dog shit or you are above and beyond brilliant.

I feel totally you're in love with them or you dread going to Yes, exactly did you find your GP because she was missing?

Yeah?

I remember how I was mentioning last week that doctor Madeline, who was my go to GP. It was the first time I had a go to favorite GP since moving out of home as an adult. She was my go to like three or four years ago. And then she went on eternity leave. I moved to a different suburb. We got him high. Yeah, and then she ended up working at a GP just down the road for me, and I was like, fuck, yeah, I want to get back in with her.

You had to book in you were a new patient.

Yeah, there was like a very long waiting list, and so I booked an appointment and I said to you, I'm just gonna have to make some shit up because I'm not ill.

Yes, but you wanted to get in front of her, Yes.

I did, so I'm in the system. So I went and I was like, what am I going to raise with her? I don't know what the fuck to talk to her about.

And then I'm also the healthiest you've ever been. You've lost all that weight, you're looking snatched, you're doing your pilates, your skin's on point, your hair's thick.

She actually said, I feel lost weight, Madeline seat normal shithouse GPS. Wouldn't remember what you looked like four years ago, of course, of course, and I walked in and she goes, you look familiar. Oh I lo, yes, perfect. But anyway, point bang, I was like, what am I going to talk to her about? I have to feign something. And then I thought, oh, I know, I'll get a second opinion.

Oh, it's very smart, because.

You guys might have noticed that a lot of the time when we're here in the studio, I'm constantly fucking putting pain relief spray on my neck, putting voltaire and on the neck. I've just got a constant sore neck.

Basically, you've got a pot of it in your house. When you walk in, You've got like seven different next prays. And I'm always just like, oh, comment, it's killing me today.

How many times have you heard that?

Yeah?

Seven? Seven? Yeah? Oh this week? This week? Right, Okay, you're really downplaying the fucking issue here, No. Seven, You're in pain. You're like my Auntie Mondo at this point. So I went to a GP in like September October.

I said, all year I had this really persistent pain in my neck on the right hand side, specifically like halfway between the spine and my right ear. Don't tell me she found it tumor, Like it's halfway between there.

Yeah.

And this GP was very dismissive the ship and he goes, ah, just use voltain and neuropan and I said, mate, I'm already doing that. I don't think you understand. It's that a point where I've realized there's obviously something wrong. That's why I'm at a fucking GP. Just the at home remedy's an't cutting it anymore.

Not working. And so I had to really twist.

His arm and say, can you at least send me for a scan or something? Because he was so prepared to just be like, fucking keep putting voltaran on. So I went and got the scan done on my neck after almost a year of neck pain, and then they sent the report to the GP. Of course I can't bloody access it, can I. I have to go back to the same dog shit a GP so that he can tell.

Me what the reports them.

And he goes, yeah, I'm all good, nothing to worry about. And then I was like, okay, sure, so what do I do? And he goes, just keep putting voltarain on your neck and having neurophone. Another ninety bucks going through all these hoops, Yeah, another ninety bucks, all this shit. Got the scan done and still no answer, And so I was like, right, I've got in a point with Madeline. Maybe I'll just ask her opinion. She was able to access my records the exact same report that this clown

Oh my god.

I knew it.

I knew there was something going on there. How the fuck can two gps read the exact same report and in the bottom in bold conclusion, he has a bulging disc in the C five whatever they part of the neck. They both read the same thing and delivered very different news. He was like, yeah, it's fine, and she goes, oh my god, you've been living with chronic pain for over twelve months. I have thank you so validating.

Yeah, oh my god, and she says voltaire in and neurophi. No, I've got to go to physio and potentially get bloody needles in the neck. What's that stuff that accupuncture? No? No, no, an actual injection quartzon quartz Yeah, okay there, Oh, Mitchell, Well, I'm very I'm happy you found answers. I know, right, what's that that first GP's number, because Wiggins might need to call him?

Well, wouldn't you believe he's the practice manager and the medical center's now closed?

Oh you're kidding.

I never kid. Wow. Interesting because she says to me, maybe you should make a complaint with the practice manager, and I said, well, he is the practice manager and he sin's gone under, which is nice. That's fine, good riddence to him.

Wowhich, I'm happy for you. That's genuinely bulging discers. Any sort of chronic pain is heavy. Yeah.

I still haven't made a physio appointment, yet.

You make sure you do it dealing with it. Can we see it? Can you turn to the side or is it.

Not aasible It's more an internal thing. She got the diagram up and was explaining it to me, and I was still kind of like, I don't know what that means. It's like the fluid between the what do they called the spine of the discs.

Yeah, I don't know. Okay, Fair, I'm really happy for you. That's really good.

You're really happy for me and my bulging disc game.

No, no, no, I'm just happy that you're validating me too, because I have found it. I've got doctor Hunter. Oh my god, it's the nicest thing in the world.

Either one you've been seeing since your circumcision.

No, No, that's doctor sad oxy action Matt. Yeah, that's right. Yeah, it's terrible.

Yeah.

I got diagnosed with sleep apnea and then doctor sides like you don't need to treat it, So I'm like, fuck you, I'm never going to see you again. Yeah. Anyway, then my mum still sees him because the family doctor, and he said, I'm so glad I had sleep apnea went away. He hasn't been in years yes, that's why, because it disappeared and I don't need to see you.

Piece of shit deliverous with that some of them. Why would you spend all that time at university studying to become a doctor only to not actually engage in the doctoring? Yeah, the doctor's not doctor. Why the fuck did you bother becoming qualified?

At that point, it's just gossip. You're just sitting there hearing people's issues. You're just bitching. Why to be there?

It literally is gossiping. But the old shit GP who's now out of business. Yeah, I did have a good bonding moment with him because I went in to get a prescription for nicotine patches because it's cheaper if a GP prescribes.

Yes.

Yes, And he was like, ah, you quitting vapes since? Yeah, And he goes, Oh, it's tough, isn't it. I'm quitting too. I've been hooked on the vape. And I'm like, you're a doctor.

Did you, of all people not know the risk?

Or you would have known and you still went there anyway? And he's like, look, I've got a nickteen gum in. So we bonded over that's so funny.

He's probably telling other people to quit vaping total.

Yeah, and he can empathize.

It's tough, man, Mitchelle, Are you sure he was a doctor?

Yeah?

His his GP practices on the street and he sat on a milk crate, and yeah, he had heaps and needles around him, so I know he worked with bloods.

You can only assume.

Just when someone says you're a doctor, you believe? Who is that? The injection clinic, the methadone clinic. They're good, they're good for Is.

It just me?

You should follow these idiots online search a couple of mitches. Do you want to hear the pitch now? Or should I do that after talk back? Well, this is Mitch's mega pitch.

I want it now.

Big pitch, A big pitch. So I love an assonance. You know this about me? No, of course, would you like some deradic hit music? Sure? Actually it's not like a daunting pitch. I feel like it's.

An opportunity, an idea for us as a team.

Okay, all right, we can make that happen.

Okay, So I guess the first question should be do I either of you already have plans for Marty Grand Night, the parade night, the Sydney Gay Pride Parade. For those listening overseas, Marty grand Night, are you doing anything? I'm not fabulous.

One of my best friends from high school has just come out, Kristian. Round of appause. Christian, she's never been to a Marti gra before.

You've got a sound effect that was really underwhelming. Round of applause.

She's just come out as gay. Congratulations to Kristin. She's lesbian. They love animals? What they love animals? Lesbians love horses.

No, that's not me saying gay men love ketamine. That's a bit of a generalization.

That's not what I meant. Okay, she's come out. This will be her first Marti grap Stop. She's a ship right, she built ships.

Stop with the sound effects. Answer the question do you have plans?

I think I'm free. I think i'm free. I should be free. I should be free Marti graat parade night. Why? Okay, I don't like this should be the situation.

You always use. This should be when you don't actually want to do it. You've given yourself the opportunity to sit on the fence.

Oh yeah, I've given myself.

You don't like the pitch you're going to go. Actually, Kristin definitely is counting on me to be there.

Do you think I'm making Kristin up?

Frankly? Yes, you're good at that anyway, I am free. The reason I'm asking is because you might remember ages ago on the podcast we had Sean Zepp's on as a guest.

I love Sean's I like him a lot.

And I don't remember how it came up, but we were talking about wouldn't it be lovely to go to the Marti Gras parade or be in the parade even with our mothers?

Yes?

Do you remember we said that.

We're like, I wouldn't that be nuhe that'd beautiful? Yes? Yes, yes, yes I do.

What if I said I can actually make that happen?

Oh Na, He's pricked up and I'm suddenly thinking, fuck you, Kristen.

Back in the closet for you, bitch or the stable as.

I am extremely intrigued. You're talking Michelle, You're talking Jane.

To check their avails.

It's just a pitch at this point. Okay. I like anything that my mum can get involved, and I love missus Chew. So we might have to give him a ring and check if they're available. Okay, before we give it the official lock in, But what's the pit? What is it?

Well, Saun's organizing a float in the parade, you know, his queer community group.

They're not for property run correct, what's it called? Shouted out?

Usion?

I'm already in.

I'm already doing the parade on the Fusion Pride float.

But a few people are dropped out, so there's a couple of spots that need to be filled.

So I'm just a fucking ring in. I wasn't first pick Jack Vision's got a two fake so.

Can't turn up.

So get it's cheering his mother?

Is how you respond to all invitations? Do you ever wonder why you spend most weekends at home?

Oh?

I have invitations? Okay, that's exciting.

So that's the pitch.

Oh, I love it. What will we be doing on the float? We'd be on with our mothers.

If they're on board. Basically, we floated this idea of ages ago, and I'm telling you that I can actually make it happen.

So cool, and so far all you've done is s bit abusive. Now I'm not I'm trying to I'm trying to keep it entertaining. It's a podcast. I love it. So Jenna and her mum is invited.

If Jenna's mum wants to come short, and it'd be.

A guaranteed spot on the float.

There's actually there's seven spots free, but actually I've already got one of them, so you don't. We don't need Mitchill, Michelle or else it four we need four spots. We've got those. We've got those to play with it.

What would I have to wear? What's what's the theme of the shirt that we.

All wear a matching sh and then you just express yourself.

Through your shorts.

It's not I'm actually getting mine tailored into a singler because I want it to be a singler.

Oh but it is. I can wear the shirt. Yeah, I mean you are? I mean, oh my god, I mean of course. I mean why wouldn't I not be in wait? Can we invite lesbian Kristen?

I don't see why not if she wants to do it as well.

She's never been on to Martigre in her life. She's just come out.

I mean, this isn't me discouraging the idea. She's more than welcome. Is that throwing someone in the deep end? Coming out of the closet and then being immediately in the parade. That might be a bit much, but floated with.

It, with it. Oh my god. Should we call our mums?

Yeah, we have to check it.

They're free. Oh my god. That's so exciting because I.

Haven't even mentioned this to Jane. This is just a pitch, as we know.

Of course. Well I'm in.

I'm confirming if this is Jane's number, okay, because wouldn't they just froth it? And also our mothers have never met. I can just imagine it. They would get along like a house on fire.

Last we spoke to your mum, she was was it your comedy shirt?

Yes?

Here we go calling Jane.

Hello.

Oh hello, hi Jane, it's your sons.

Hello.

How are you going good? You're on the podcast to say, you know, I've got a pitch.

For you, Jane.

Oh the sound series. Happy New Susan. By the way, everyone, Jane.

Thank you. I'm playing a dramatic drone because it's Mitch's big pitch.

Okay, let's go. I'm ready.

So, Jane, are you free on the second of March It's a Saturday.

No, not in the slightest What are you doing on the second.

Is that a Saturday, Yes, I'll be down on the South coast at the what's the Cold Red Hot Summer Tour is.

Putting that on?

Yeah, that's.

Saturday, Susy.

Yes, I'm really excited about it. A nice house right on the water. After three nights, I've heard it.

Frankly, well, rubbing salt in the wound actually my birthday present.

Birthday, Yeah, I hope you have the best time.

What if I offered you an even more tempting present and you've got to choose?

Like what?

Well, Mitch and I had this lovely idea that we would go in the Mardi Gras parade with our mother's.

I would have the best.

Time, you would, Michelle, My mum would be there. She's sixty as well. You've got so much in common, You've got gay mitches.

I know like it's going to happen, really, doesn't it? On the wall?

Yeah?

Book me into next year, Yeah for sure, Jane, Sorry to oh my god, I understand that.

That is going to be a good show.

Should we bother trying?

Michelle, that's just going to be rubbing my face in it. If she's there and my mum is it's like that day at school when it was to bring your parents to work day and she got tired up on the farm and she never turned up physically.

Yeah, you're close to Bilangalo estate. I'm not, you're close. They're actually hello Michelle speaking hello Mom. It's Mitch and Mitch.

Hi, Hi, Hi everyone?

How are you good?

Yeah?

What do you want to do?

You want to extend the invitation to you?

Mitch has a pitch for you. Mumm, He's got something he'd like to offer you.

Now.

You do not have to say yes, get your diary out. There's no pressure, but I know you'd love it.

Are you free on Saturday the second of March?

Oh no, I'm sorry, I'm really not.

Well.

We've got marks to Auntie's eighties birthday.

Oh wait, Auntie Manda Annie's birthday. Oh god, that's what the airbnb was for. You still owe your son too? Grand By the way, Michelle.

Oh no, why what?

What? What?

What's on offer?

We were going to invite you to be in the Mardi Gras parade with us, but we'll just operate on the assumption that you're homophobic. Goodbye.

Oh no, she said. The thought the Marti Gral was a week.

After, No, mom, how dare Auntie Monda have her eightieth on the on the Mardi Gras?

Well, Look, I would have been my pleasure to support you all, but I'm pretty sure that.

I have to get my diary.

But I'm pretty sure that's the weekend.

Is it a Saturday night?

Yeah? It is.

All right?

Sorry tunnel she's gone.

Well don't we feel really warm inside? Right now?

Wow?

Fuck? Both our mothers could not care less?

Wasn't Sean Zepp's describing that magical moment when he within a Pride parade with his mother, And that's when we came up with the idea.

And now our mothers are both booked. We bother bother calling Rosman.

No.

I think she because she doesn't like being in front of people.

She likes being exclusively behind people.

She just doesn't like being what audience?

Okay, oh that's fair.

So you're not going to picture to her? Yeah? Okay, oh yeah, picture to it. That's fine.

See see where we go in her own time?

Yeah, okay, I'll ask her.

Well, I mean, I'm down. Let me see what Christens doing. It could be very fun for her, good first experience.

Yeah, no, it suns around. So you can either do a dancing role or just a walking role.

It's up to you. You can see the walking role or the dancing Can I let you know what a later date read what role twos?

Yeah, of course, I honestly assume you'd go for walking.

Yes, I'm walking. I think I do walking. All right, Well lock me in. Yeah, let me talk to Kristin and we can go from there. Okay, well, I'll lock you in. Yep. Correct. Are you sure it's locked? I've just played the sund effect. I mean I have to talk to Chris pending what she's doing because she's scared for her first martograph. I would love to be in. A flight is an after party?

Are you locked in?

I'm locked in?

Lock me lock her in?

So it's a seventy five dollar fee, Yeah, but it's towards the No, it's all just going to mander.

But I could pop it on the kiddy. Okay, yeah, put on the business. It's a business expense. Yeah, yeah, sure, sure, sure and that includes your shirt obviously. Yeah no, what no doubt? Yeah, I mean yeah, of course sounds fun. You're sure, yes, okay, I mean definitely, I'm going to the Bondo beach party with Slater when I think that's the interesting as if so fi other spects, there wouldn't be what you lead with. I'm a slader boy, fair enough?

On it on the show this is happening?

Yeah?

Can I get a I can't get like a written agreement, But can we like shake on it so that I can count on Mitchell?

But what if my friend Kristen shake on it?

I've extended my hand.

It is this to be film missing?

Yeah?

Okay, yeah we do. I don't even need to shake in it with Jenna. I take her it at word. I completely agree those are locked on? All right? Sure, agreed, But let's not half half about it. How are you making me feel pressured?

No?

I don't want a pressure.

It's your choice and you've chosen yes, So let's move on before we have the chance to back out. It be so much fun, I'm sure it will.

Should we do talkback things?

Yeah?

Before we go?

Why not? It's been a while. Let's jump in.

No, when our age listens to talkback radio, do they? It's all old widows.

I actually don't think the old widows even listen. I think they sort of lie there while at plays to keep their heart beating.

And those that can still operate a phone and yes, somewhat of a conversation they call up.

It's probably the same sort of clowns that were on Jenn's cruise.

Yeah.

I will say though, as someone who is a broadcaster for a living, there is a charm about live radio. Are It's so nice? That's what you and I bond over. That's where the friendship really started. We both love live radio.

And I would assume that a lot of these old people that listen to talk back radio, like the really really old ones, they wouldn't have things like Facebook, so it is a sense community for them.

Yeah, oh they don't know otherwise. Yeah, this is their Facebook.

But that doesn't mean that we can't have a little giggle at them behind their back, because we like to bring you the cooked shit that we hear on talkback radio, particularly from John Laws.

Yeah. Yeah, well, last time we discussed talkback teams, I think we all tried to ginger nut for the first time for the first time?

Was that your first time trying dinger nuts?

Those cookies? Yes, right, Yeah, they're stunning. Oh they're amazing.

Yeah.

I went home a border pack, did you. Yeah, they were delicious, But I bought the Audi ones and they're harder at Audi, which isn't afraid of some hard in his mouth anyway.

I'm not so John Laws. He's notoriously a bit cranky, right famously, and sometimes he can have his wholesome moments. Yeah, and so someone called up to his talkback radio show and they just wanted to tell a joke, right cute that sounds like it could be wholesome.

Ye.

Do you want to guess which way John took it? Cranky or wholesome?

I'm going to say cranky, maybe even offended.

Okay, well take a list and find out.

Taffy, are you there? I'm here all right, Taffy, Why have you called me today?

I want to tell you a little joke. Teddy Bear goes for a job on the building side job Teddy Bear, teddy Bear, Yeah, And he goes up with the boss and the chance of a job, and the boss looks at the me and thinks, oh, Chris, I'll better give him a job. I don't love me for discrimination. So he starts off to work and he's really good, puts his tools down and goes for his lunch. And then when he comes back from lunch, his pick has been stolen.

Is what you know?

He pick you back the bus said, right, he said to the boss, someone stolen my pick. Okay, so I forgot to tell you. Today's the day that Teddy's aut pick nicked.

Oh that's very bad.

No it's not.

Everyone laughs that.

Intelligent people usually laugh.

Oh no, not around here. That's very corny, Taffy, very corny.

Oh no, oh yes, no, I've made a bit of money telling jokes stand up comedy.

I do you they paid your money to make you sit down? I would imagine.

Yes, that's terrible, John, Your program is so boring. Now that's why I try to put a joke in.

Yes, you've made it worse. Could you tell me, Taffy, why is the program boring?

Don't tell me it's your show?

Well it is, No, it's not.

It's our show.

John, bull shit it to my show. Excuse me?

Not without us? You bean nothing.

You're just a nasty piece of work.

Oh, dear, free speech, anything it's all gone.

No it hasn't. Free speech still exists.

No it doesn't, Yes it does, No it doesn't.

Well, all right, so it doesn't. I don't know. Well who's silenced?

You?

Who would have tried? Didn't do good enough job?

Don't you tell?

With your comebacks? Christ not bad though.

It's not a comeback. It's simply your comment.

Yes you saw me, John, your bloody shit yourself.

Uh, very careful what you say.

I'm six foot five and you don't know nothing.

Oh, come on, you raving old bully. He's stupid basard. I think you were mad, Taffy.

No, we're all mad, and we're all racists, aren't. No, goodbye.

He's an unpleasant man, that isn't he?

That was incredible.

That was my favorite base of John Law's audience.

Incredible.

That was the slowest fight I've ever heard of.

Emotion there was.

There was like fighting in slow motion, weren't they. Yes. At one point, Taffy is threatening to bash him. Ah, I can destroy you.

I'm six foot five.

And John's only come back. Oh oh oh oh he's stupid bathard.

And then he's like that's a good comeback.

Oh yeah. They were kind of enjoying it in a w Yeah, I've got another one for.

It's not tappy. It's just another old idiot.

Yep.

So someone called through to John. I guess it could be John Laws's talent quest call through to do a bit of a recital.

He is how it went, Robert Are you there? Yes?

I am John.

How are you very well? Thank you John.

I'm just tell you to keep the dream alive. I played with the music. Can I can I play a song?

Yeah? Yes you can if you want to. Yeah, what have you got to play around?

I've got to play on an organ?

Have you got an organ? Closer to the telephone? The organs are big things.

I'm I'm more ready to go, John, all right?

Well off you go?

Okay John, well ticket?

I thought he was ready. Here we go, Here we go, I think, Hey Robert, yes, John, come on mate. We can't wait all day.

No, John, Sorry, I've.

Right you ready there?

Yeah, John, have already. Something's happened, something streep's happening. Well, I wanted to do for you another time, John, Sorry about that. What have you been John?

I've been very well, thank you, But I'm worried about your instrument. What's happened to your instrument?

Oh John, Look, come, something has happened. I don't know what's that. Look, I'll do it for another time, John, Actually, I don't want to waste time here, right. Oh yeah, so no, John, I've got a great family which I can't complain about.

No, well, you wouldn't want to complain about them if they're good.

And also, John, look, i'm a I love tennis. Actually I used to like Area Agacy when he played tennis.

Yeah, my god, he was good. I love Andre too. Yeah. Yeah, Now I think we might have finished our conversation, have we, Robert.

Yeah, I think we have.

Jorn here, Okay, goodbye.

I am taking notes once again. I'd love to end every conversation with that. I think we've finished our conversation, haven't we? All right? Goodbye?

Yep.

Aggressive rock music ever comes out of absolutely nowhere. He's still quick on the buttons, though, isn't he. I'mtually picking stuck in the lift of someone. You're like, okay, goodbye.

Fuck.

I wish we hadn't banned prank calls on the podcast. Imagine how funny it would be if Dot Wiggins called a radio station and said, I'm going to play the saxophone. You ready, here I go. You do a better impression. Actually, hello, the saxophone. You'd like to play the saxophone? Would you do? When you're ready?

Told, I'm blowing John, if you go with the read who? Yeah? Okay, m hm not I'm worried about your instruments. I think we're all with management. Known for John has been fine for Little Drive. Mm hmm, oh John, Yes, you play your instrumental?

Watch?

Oh fuck, you have to end it? Oh well, I'm not quite fond of my family. I've got a gay grandson, a girl or boy, all of it transphobic, can't.

We No, that's not very kind?

Dos all right? Goodbye? That's a saying everybody, we're ready to go totally.

I agree.

Let's take over seventy years of broadcasting. Let's do it.

You know what we need to do. Because we interviewed him in like twenty twenty or twenty twenty one, yeah, age of ago now, and it was kind of an open door policy. The producer said, he loved you guys. You can come back and do another interview anytime. Surely he's not gone long left, so we should get it in the can and then when he dies, we could be like the last interview that John ever recall.

Oh that's true, Oh viral, that's true. That happened to me when I interviewed the guy from what's that band? The Foo Fighters Foo Fighters, his last ever interview. Died the next morning and they're like, this is the last one for the two of me. They're going to fly to Thailand tomorrow, and then he died. That's very sad, I know, but let's try to collect them all. John Law's next, No, we don't wish that, of course, no, no.

Of course, Nom is providing us with so much joy. Even still in the five years of this podcast, how many times as John Laws cracked us up.

I know, I was so nervous during that interview. I was so scared. I was intimidated by him. Should we go?

Yeah, let's get out of here.

Thanks for listening, guys, five stars, please leave us a review.

Back again on Monday. I can't wait to tell you all about the Taylor Swift show. Oh god, yeah, go ahead, Yes you really want to hear it? Mitchell, You're not a fan.

I'm a fake fan. I want to go because it's all anyone's talking I can admit it. No, no, no, I just I'm just I just' she Yeah, she's great.

I want to hear all of that.

Very goodou No, Taylor's good. Just you know, go on nothing. But I love her. Okay, I'm a swift day. I should really go back and like screen record all the times you've slagged her off. I wouldn't slag her. I love her. She'm all about burning petrol in the sky, burn the planet down.

Anyway, we'll chat to you on Monday.

Well, yeah, I love you guys, Thanks for listening. No worries.

We will see you all in a couple of days. Pat you down, but bait see. Welcome to eight to debrief. This is our secret segment on the end the shows that over.

We talked shit here.

It keeps.

Yeah, sort of a flow on effect, isn't it. I suppose that's kind of what this is. It's kind of just flows on from the main show. I need to take my fucking deckses. I'm fading. I'm fading, got my afternoon dice. I'm almost an hour late. I'm getting a panado becase I've got a fucking headache.

You'd give panadol a headache, Darland.

Seriously, that's a good one. Did you think of it?

No?

I didn't sol from sans bother Actual, I have pandole osteo oh, maybe that would be good for my bulging disc. Do you want to take some?

Yeah?

Go on, Actually no, I probably shouldn't just take panadole for no reason.

We're going to say pandol from a stranger. I'm like, you know me. Actually, the doctors advised me to take care of that. Yes, because it's anti inflamatory.

Yeah.

True.

I take a mixture if I need it, a near remole. Yeah. You know you can get melts now in europhone and they melt in your mouth. Why would you want that? Because some people can't swallow tablets?

Yeah, liquid thing.

You just watched me take my adhd metes without water. You just dry run that, yeh. Jesus Mitchell.

I've been taken five or six a day for five or six years, so of course I've got it down pat.

They're also tiny, tiny thing.

Actually, how many years.

Has it been since twenty fifteen? Almost ten?

That's how long?

Wow, I haven't taken Yeah, it's a long time.

Nearly my decks of verse three.

You're you're medicated by all definitions. Yeah, that's fun. I just took two. I could be medicated.

Oh my god, you're just like one of those teenagers. It's like, oh my god, I'm so drunk off for lemon lime bitters because it's a little bit of I I'm out a panel guys, how off my face?

No, you know you're really Yeah.

Cauldrel on the other hand.

Oh boy, coldrel does knock you around. You know what knocks you around? Too many ventil and inhalations. Yeah, like the puffers. It makes me shake really, Oh it makes me shakey, jittery, crazy, crazy. How did you get to that point? Had one too many paths? Actually, no, when I was a kid, I'd go, I'll do it right now because I've got one, and I only have one because I've learned from my mistakes. I used to do this in high school and the girls are just drop ready.

I go, oh you you blow the asthma paffa out like it's a vape.

Yeah, but I didn't realize that, like the mouth can still absorb medication. So I do that thirty to forty times a day as a party trick, yep, and then I would be on the bus home shaking as a child.

That's how I speak in code because, as you know, I don't own a vape, which, in my stupid mind, my logic is that if I don't own one, then I'm not addicted.

Am I That's right?

But if I want to scab one from a friend, I'll say, oh, my asthma's flair enough. Do you have a puffer on you?

Yeah?

Yes, of course, here goes Yeah, I feel much better.

Yeah, of course I'm cured. I'm shocked that I haven't gotten hooked on bapes. I love When the grape one came out, I was like, this delicious. I could get addiction to this. I don't think you have that much of an addictive personality though, No, I don't. Foods my only thing, Like, I will eat. Like, there were chocolates out there. I had like five chocolates. I just love to eat. That's my one thing.

Five chocolates. You're out of control.

Someone try and stop me.

Guys.

It was really random to they had five chocolate and Panada.

I know, I random.

Mitch called me the other night. I was driving home from doing the night show and he was like, I'm on a lie fancy your phone. Like, all right, I was going through the MACS drive foot and I ordered a MC Chicken paddy, which is my hack. Or I get them Crispy Chicken patty and then it's just the chicken patty. But it's just like a one giant nugget. It's like this big. It's chicken. It's like a giant nugget, basically a schnitzel. Yeah, oh my god, yes, good point.

It's like actual breast, right, okay, yeah chicken though, yeah it's chicken allegedly.

Yeah, so they say what it really is? Yeah, I don't want to know. How about a hack? Well no, many people have the confidence to go. Can I just have a raw piece of chicken? Put a chicken in a box? You can do it. You can do whatever you want.

Cool.

You probably have never been through a drive through, Jenny, You don't drive? Yeah, we took through. You ever driven through one? Yes? Oh with me?

I was in the car.

Yes.

Oh, well, God for it. I don't remember every moment of anything we've ever done. It's been one hundred and eighty seven nine shows. One hundred and eighty seven. Sorry, it's actually one hundred and eighty six. Oh is it? Yeah?

Good to see you're across the nitty gritty though.

To keep those shirts remade, what if we just.

Started celebrating really unmomentous episodes, like we started sending out smash cakes to people, being like, congratulations on two hundred and seven episodes.

Remember I used to start the show with the number. I'd be like episode four, feeling sore.

Yeah, a little rhyme, yeah, But then they started to kind of repeat themselves because there's actually only ten numbers. Sine even there's only nine, is there?

Yeah? Yeah?

Why because because double did No matter what you're up to one any one, one, two, one eighty three, that number is still the last thing that you say, so you can rhyme with it.

Oh yeah, right, yeah, one eighty six. I'm feeling like a spirits. It's not good. See it's not good?

Is that going to be the episode title? Assonance?

We'll put the ars in assonance? Don't ever, don't you? Oh, they need the promo for my night show urgently.

Do you want me to do it? Do you want me to do it? Hey, guys, it's Mitch Cheery here from the Night Show.

From the Night Show tonight.

What's happening tonight?

The Swift is in town. I'll show you the script. Just read the script, and.

I know you trick. You're throwing a few ums and ass to make it sound like you're not writing a script, and it's just natural. Here we go, hate Smitch from the Night Show. She's the biggest artist in the world. You need to give them time because they'll edit in hate Smitch from the Night Show. They'll ed it in a honey hey, they edit in sound effects, right.

Take two?

Okay, heyt Smith from the Night Show. She's the biggest artist in the world. Oh sorry, they put four exclamation marks on the script. She is the biggest artist in the Wow and the ears to It is about to hit our city. We have all your free tailor tickets. We have reserved Entireroe for you and all your friends. Keep a kiss from seven for your chance to win.

That's that.

That was actually very good.

That was good.

That good, not bugs, Bunny.

I was in the car the other night and I happened to catch the.

Start of your radio show last night. Oh I can't remember, but I heard the opener for your shirt. Yeah, very sneaky. What they've done there, they've done.

They've got like some celebrity ideas. Hey, it's Lizzo our I'm here with Mitch Churia. They mentioned your name correct and like other people hates tones and I I love Mitch Cherry. And then they throw in, what's up, it's.

Taylor's it's your Gorianna. I love this show. They've never spoken ever. Okay, what you're excluding is that we've got Lizzo saying Mitch Churry.

I didn't exclude that.

I actually fucking said that. But you really must listen Katy.

Perry, I don't have cat Katy Perry. Hi, this is Katy Perry with Mitch Turl. But you're right. They have put in Taylor's to a big artist at the moment.

Yeah, that's what I said. They sprinkled it in there to make it sound like they were.

Also, yeah, that's a classic radio game.

Yeah, sneaky. Hang on, can I show you something before we go?

Actually? Yeah, then I do.

Do you think I've got a video? Because Oscar is the dance captain.

What's Oscar's name again? On this show? Roving reporter, do you.

Think this dance. It's in mirror view like you're playing. Just dance is doable for you. But you can take the phone, do a book.

I don't want to do it. I'm not a dancer. I'm mother of mine.

I'm giving it a red hot guy.

Oscar is doing a great job. I don't want to do it. I like to walk. I'm not confident. I'm not a confident dancer. But god, boy, can I walk.

There's one thing you've been able to do almost your whole life.

Yeah, they say I walked out of the vagina. No new skills, none. God, my quads are thick.

You know what I can do?

Yeah? Breathe. Yeah, God, you're really good.

At that.

Like no one else. Your heart beats Jenner boy, my kidneys they flush piss really well.

We heard this podcast at least better today, So we do.

There, we do.

We'll see you in a little bit. Thanks for listening. Five star review. If you haven't yet, Spotify, Apple or the Jazz, follow us on Insta A couple of inches please stay hi. Also our Facebook group Endurant Idiots. Join it.

We just we just chat.

There's a Facebook chat as well.

Yeah, there's a link in the show notes to our Facebook group. You've obviously got to answer the entry question, which is what's the name of the secret segment? If you're listening right now, you know it's eighty Dbrie. Of course the spelling is debatable. It doesn't matter how you spell it.

We'll link you went grow up to You're not very welcoming.

Bye. Hang on, hang on?

What about this.

Idiots? I think we might have finished our conversation, haven't we Yeah, we're done Rakoba.

So