Just stood by a couple of mitches. Yeah, delace yourself for the rude shocks of young adults. Has it just been on the fly? A Santah lost his impact? What do you mean more?
It's because you're not a child, You're not as excited about it.
I thought of an intruder. I love a man to climb into my house in the middle of the night.
You're like, I'll squeeze through your chimney team.
I'm like, I'm got your sack on this. He is Mitury and Mitchell coos.
Hello, yea, Marry Christmas, you helloy idiot's Merry Christmas. Give us your best Santa Ho ho ho easily.
Of course I can do it.
Yeah, you were born for it. Man, you's got to be puffed over.
Mary chrismas well. The bloods rushing into my head. Yeah, that looked like it heard a bit. I don't know how Santa does it. That really does someone called gurd srewed up. Get me a water.
But you were so good at it. I'm telling you this media career doesn't work out for you. You set you can just be a Westfield Santa. I could also see I don't know what you do the rest of the year, though, career.
Wife, I'd be bargue and destiny. This podcast perfect. I do this podcast, and then the month of December I take it off and I go to exclusively Westfields, and then I just hibernate for the rest of the year. I'd be really good. Yeah you would.
I'm telling now you could be.
My helf how dear. As I said that, I realized that that's insulting.
And then well, I with height proportion, I am a lot shorter than you, so I would look like an elf t your Santa correct.
Yeah, to scale, you look like you look the tea.
I don't consider myself to be a short person. I just happen to be surrounded by a lot of tall people.
So look our friend circle. Tall men. Yeah, very tall man, very Sean's tall. I'm tall. You could even get the little prosthetic wax ear tips that they put on the elves. I'd love to see you in that really.
Yeah, of course I were a little green. You just can't be flattering, can they?
Oh? Absolutely? I wonder if that elongate the face. You know what I mean?
Nothing can't do you When he favors having these big fuck off ears.
And also elves. How do they have those shoes with the bells on them? Everyone can hear them coming. The bells on the toe like a cat collar, like a little cat collie. Yeah yeah, speaking of cat colar Price, Jenna is here for the final episode our third Wheel rocked up.
I'm here, Jenna. I know what you might be thinking. By the way, have we banished our yearly tradition of putting you in something?
Oh?
Yeah, you know in the past we've put her in a coffin, tout her in a bin, We've put her in a straight jacket because usually the last episode of that we put her in something. It's not too late.
What can we do by the end, Let's hope she's in a catatonic state. Nope.
For Christmas this year, Jenna, we're putting you in debt.
There you go.
Yeah, surprise.
Well, we are doing our first annual Christmas gift. We're doing Bad Santa, and we all had a savage Savage Sorry, isn't that what it's called Savage Santa?
The savage element is because everyone gives one gift, received one gift, but you're also entitled to one steal. So if you prefer someone else. That's gift. You're like, give it here mine.
Well, listen. It is the final show of the year, as well as the Christmas episode. So I thought, got a bit of bubbles. Guys.
See, we weren't going to drink because we drank last week, and I thought two weeks in a row is a bit that looks a bit bad. But it feels correct that we're popping champions for the last episode we always do.
Oh cheers. Jeez, God could have been killed. You got the glasses. Here we go. You've had a very very profitable sorry, good year.
Debt.
Yeah, there is actually destitute.
How would you actually get someone else in debt? If we wanted to go about that, how do you get because you can get yourself in debt easily, but how do you get someone else in debt?
Like a so we like talk time share, we sell gender on a time share. We scam her.
You know, I don't know what any of that means.
There's your bubble. Excuse me?
Sorry, the tides out? What the fuck it was one third of a glass?
Are you joking?
I don't know?
Thank kid, thank you here, Jenne?
Do you want one?
Yeah?
Okay?
Why not? He pass both, Mitchta Jesus, thank you so Jenna.
It's a bit of a lightweight, so one will be more than enough.
Yeah.
Yeah, I'm so excited for the Christmas gift exchange. The gifts are in front of us, and we have all gone for very different sized boxes.
Yeah, but just because it's small doesn't mean it's the worst one. Although there's just something ingrained in us as humans, like I'm thinking, Oh, I want the big one.
Yeah, the big looks good.
One does a good Mitch, you've got a big box too, Yeah, I do. I mean if I had a dollar sounding like a lesbian at a nightclub, I've been eyeing off your box all night.
It looks phenomenal al, So you wouldn't really see a lesbian a nightclub.
So yeah, very marriage.
No one knows what they sound like.
Really.
One of my best friends from childhood just came out as gay wow at twenty eight, late bloomer, late bloomer, and I'm so excited to go gay clubbing with her. I don't have any close lesbian friends. It's so exciting.
Neither do I. And I've been thinking I've got a friend some lesbians on purpose because someone has to ask me to father their child on.
One hundred, Yeah, of course, would you come out to Birdcage a gay club in Sydney for the internationals.
Not even a gay club. It's a gay night a Wednesday. Yeah, isn't that pitiful?
What we have so.
Many gay clubs. But then for the lesbians they just get a Wednesday evening.
But what venue is it?
It's at the Bank Hotel in Newtown. That's burkat Wow Wednesday. I believe Bird's a feather. Oh yeah, dance together.
Well, my gay friend who I won out great Christmas gift, she came out to me, was like you shocked her and absolutely not.
Were you the first third?
And I was so fucking offended.
That's pretty high up the peck and Mitch, I think.
You were like second person I ever came out to.
Really first, I was the first.
Jenna and you. Jenna kept saying puff under a breath for years as I worked here, and I thought she was just referring to the purple couches here at the radio station, but no, it was a slur. Yeah, Mitch, you were like the second or the I don't remember the first. I think it was you. It could have been me because it was via Facebook Messenger and I wanted it to sound like it was cool and I had told one hundred people, but.
You gas lip me for not having already known, like I can't believe you didn't know, you know, I'm gay? And I was like, oh no, I don't.
Yeah, I was not.
Well I think you did that and now I know that I was the first that's so gas lighted, Like how did you not know? Everyone knows?
Anyway, Merry Christmas, Cheers, cheers, we have to talk.
Cheers to season five of vid GYM. Thank you to everyone that's been listening from the beginning. Thank you to everyone that's joining us along the way. Cheers.
We should have done like an igym rapped, Like how Spotify do it? Actually, we get one fun fact for people that might not know, but because we create the podcast, we get a special creator. Yeah, Spotify rapped and it tells you new listeners, countries of listeners, demographic everything.
A lot of numbers were being thrown around. It's confusing, but yeah, they basically just said a very high percentage of people that listen to the podcast this year it was their first time listening, so got.
A bunch of new idiots.
Isn't that fun?
Welcome, thank you for listening, and tell a friend like a lot of times when I meet someone out or like we go gay Cobby, like I love your show. A friend, like a gay friend was listening and they told me to listen. So that's our Your Christmas gift to us this year is to just tell a friend about the.
Podcast word of mouth mate.
Yeah, totally it works.
It really works.
Also a lot of UK and the US listeners, which is so cool. I can't remember who was in front out of those two UK you. I think it was a UK potentially probably, I don't know. Anyway, I'll be heading into your UK idiots and I'll be coming to the country.
Wow, don't be foul.
Wow. My WAYO is similar to my Santa Wow. Oh it's in the same point of my throat.
I don't reckon. I could pull off either of those things, the ho ho or the way try both now. Also, I need to know when do you use a WAYO?
What's appropriate?
Can I can I say something yeah? No, you guys doing that way or whatever? Thing over here is so annoying?
Oh can you hear it from your end of the office?
Single context where with our show that we use the iHeart Studios, which is also the Kiss FM studios.
And right next door down the hallway is WSFM, the old people station with Jenner work.
Correct. So what you I started the way that's my catch call.
Well, everyone does it, and it's the most irritating thing.
Well we do it, meach, when there's a big success, when a child falls over, when something funny happens, you go wowow see I sort of interpreted as the equivalent of it. But that well, yeah, yeah, definitely that's me. Do it again. Well that is good.
That's something that i'd hear from.
Try fuck, okay, hang on, it's got to come to the diaphragm of film.
That was actually no, that was that one.
Let me close my eyes, go christ that's actually it's actually good.
I put my whole core strength into that.
That that hurts. That was impressing.
That was good.
See. I think I'd be a great like Christmas song cover singer, you know, like if I were just again here we go, I could do this. You do. Santa Baby is Santa Baby. It's great for you to be Santa Baby, and I'll be this boo boom Sana Baby words it's actually very generous.
A bit insulted that you said this sounds so mean.
It's perfect for me. Listen to it.
Then an awful good girl, Santa Baby Harry down the chimney too.
So this version is not called the one's better.
Oh, absolutely, no, that's not what we want this It is all right. Well, it's our final show of the year. Can't wait for the gift exchange coming up. But of course a real Christmas snack. I have been in the kitchen all night. I will be presenting at last the apple sandwich.
Oh my god.
Yeah, and I can tell you it's a chicken mayonnaise fennel an apple sandwich made from scratch by me. I poached the chicken. And it's one of the rights that we're doing.
This is because I'm just anti fruit in places that ought not be I e. Salads and sandwiches.
I've seen what you've done with a banana in your time. Don't lie.
Excuse me.
You put fruit in places that God never intended it scenario.
Would you have seen me do that?
You talks of such a lie that could never be true. Yeah, well, fruit, and I know what you two get up to. Nice fruit, not my best known away like a little way. Yeah, it's one syllable. Yeah, the chicken sandwich full of mayo, full of no no. You know my favorite streaming service cow not this.
Anyway. Thank you for organizing this champagne for it's Mitchell, I'll transfer you shouldn't have.
To pay Yeah, good?
Oh please don't.
Actually after the apple sandwich later in the show today, I've actually brought another treat, Mmm, crackers. What was a brand?
Oh? So oh god? Okay, well, any brand listeners that have discovered us over summer, and this episode is at the top of the feed, welcome this thought of bullshit we get up to.
We're on break at the time of listening. When we come back, we promise there'll be better content. We can't promise anything, rane Fried. What we can promise is that every week we start the show with it is It Just Me? Something we've noticed hey to appreciate.
Every Monday, Mitch and I bringing is It Just Me? Each but being a Wednesday, we're handing it over to you. But it is it just You?
Today? The last is It Just You of the year. We're going to Tamworth where we've got ol Hello.
Now, Hi, how are you Merry Christmas, darl And I like what you did there with the hello are you hello you?
How's teen Worth this time of year? Very hot?
Very very hot.
I can imagine Timworth is like a big country town, but it also gets freezing as fuck. It does. Yeah, it's the big city. Have you been to Sydney?
I mean, compared to the countrytown I grew up in, Tamworth would be considered a city.
That's true.
I've got a good guys ship. That city's bag. What time do your coals and woolies close of the night? Nine? Oh? Fuck?
That?
Come on?
Is there anything twenty four hours there? Like a servo uber eats anything like that?
Macas from ten Worth, I've got the shock.
Of me life. And I had a house party of their friend's place in Forbes and it was like ten thirty and I was like, God, I'm starving.
Can we get the foods?
She goes, there's nothing open in Forbes After ten pm, I was like, oh my god, it becomes so spoiled and used to Sydney.
There I had to make something in the kitchen. God forbid.
How I just starved to death, which made me.
With you and all the farm life. Well you got the golden guitar, right ol. Yes, yeah, you said it like Miley Cyrus.
Yeah, yeah, I love.
Joined on my own. No way that one.
Didn't just the words Miley Cyrus.
Yes.
Well wow, God, I thought I was a fan girl with all the merch that I've drunk purchased. But tattoo from my lee whereabouts.
On your arm?
On my forearm where everyone can see it?
Of course?
Yeah? Where that's dedication.
Do you like the new one, the new song? Yeah? Of course, yeah, you would have to if you imagine if you hated it, they'd be embarrassing to wear a long sleeve neckerchief for years. All right, let's get you to do the last Is it just you of the year? Are you ready out?
No pressure our?
All right, Bradley's going to count you in, bluck. Is it just me? Does every man on a dating app have a filthy feral beard?
Yes, a filthy feral bee f f B.
I hate an f B.
I'm with you everything fonts the Hinge by the way, fuck sake.
Well mit, you found your beloved show I did on Hinge. Tell us about that.
I hear about that in the addat I have hit you will.
I have and I love hinge, but yes, every man and I'm dating man exclusively have shitty, rady beards. If you notice that, ol.
Yes, it's disgusting. I'm like, shave it off, get rid of it.
Feel it's coming into fashion. Isn't it the beer? But I notice a lot of people with spass facial hair that you can't really grow a proper beard. Are just jumping the gun a beer. It's not a beerd It just looks like you need a shave.
Yeah, are the worst?
Well, there's the inner time worth coming out, not even talking about just all stop. They should be eradicated.
You know, it's funny whenever Shan's facial hair grows with a certain length, it's red hair, really, brother in law, it's just a redhead beard.
I don't know if you've gotten close enough to me, but I've got a full blown mustache at the moment. My inner ethnic is really showing.
How's it going on the dating apps? In time worth? Just generally speaking though, because like I know that country town people, the pool is a bit smaller. You run out of potential matches a lot quicker.
Yes, it's awful.
You'd match up with a sheep. If you kept swiping, you'd get a rose from a goat. Hey, I want to go to Billy Tea tonight and Damper. You never bibility in Tamper. You lived on my land, the Great Ozzie Bush Camp, they said a kitchen. See, then we need to reinvent school camp because I went to the Great Dozzy Bush Camp. Which don't start me on that being burnt down because I'll be upset again.
I was at the fake ularu. Correct, that was that deserved.
To be burnt down, evil that they were playing into. But they'd be like, this is how people in Forbes live. They have bush tap for dinner and they have Damper with golden syrup and butter.
You've never been to my hometown bog and Gate, but I should take you out there and try and time in around the Trundle Bush Tucker Festival.
Oh I love a bushtuck a day.
Maybe, Oh I love that.
I actually would now that I'm close with your parents like your mom DMS me and oh you'd love it. Of course I'd love to come. Just finding the time, all right, Well, our Merry Christmas, Happy New Year? How long have you been listening?
Pretty much forever.
That's you're a day one. We'll make sure you hit.
Up Mitch's Newcastle shows.
Wait, that's still going to be a bit of a trick for you. Turn Worth to Newcastle.
How far is that it is? It's four hours but it's ccosis and we're holding out.
That's so sweet. That's really quil your dedication. That's nice. You're featured on the show now, so.
Yeah, make sure you heat up Jenna on our Instagram and a couple of mitches and you can claim your prize.
Might take some time because I'm going on a cruise, so.
Yeah, you won't get that till mid Mar. It's coming, you'll get it in September. Happy New Year.
Thanks Alan.
If you want to get in touch dms oh, you can of course send us a text on this number.
Till nine A two zero two.
Nine.
That's our beautiful roving reporter Oscar singing there and he will be joining us in a bit for our Savage Santas Jane.
And we thought there's there's no fun in three people playing Savage Santo.
Well there's that, but also the whole family should be together.
I agree, I agree.
Contraceptive Diaphram Sam a call later.
I assume a close friends story that poor bustards flat out.
Like a living Yeah, there's absolutely no guarantee.
So stressed. He's very good at what he does, but very stressed and somehow thinner than before. I didn't think it was possible.
He seems to be loving the new gig. That's anyone worried about our former team member Sam.
Now he's killing and he's clearly got more cash. I mean I saw him the other day and he was in a full suit.
A full suit before he just that half like a news reader that has board shorts under the desk but fancy up top.
That was se.
Very that is it just me the rude shocks of young adults.
Food.
Okay, the moment you've all been waiting for.
Everybody, you throw around, Oh, it's what you've been waiting for, but really waiting.
You are the one who requested that I bring this segment to the show after. That's not true. I'll remind you all that a few weeks on the show, we had this discussion.
Any salads that have bits of apple in it? Fucking I hate fruit in salad.
Oh my god, but apple's not a fruit. Apples is but I mean apple has apples, but apple on a sandwich.
No.
Oh, that cut us off early because you said, all right, I'm bringing one in next week. I didn't demand. But you're trying to change me mind. I'll try and be a little bit more open minded than I was in that audio.
Correct. I just feel and I'm gonna be serious here. A bit of cranberry, a bit of sweet, natural fresh fruit in a salad or a sandwich can change the world. A Waldorf salad famously.
Has Pah, that's my least favorite.
Okay, what about a nut? Do you like a macadamia pine nut salad? What are you a fucking rabbit like it?
Grow up?
Salads aren't just lettuce. It's not weight Watchers Days nineteen ninety And.
I don't even like lettuce in a salad.
What do you want in a salad?
Finich?
Baby?
Oh?
What about rice? Do you're like rice? Grains of rice?
I don't dislike it, but it's not my go to. I'm not like, thank god there's rice in the South.
No.
No, if a salad has something sweeten it, I am sold to describe apple as sweet, but it adds sweetness to a salad and it also adds sweetness.
It's not that I don't like apples. I like a standalone Granny Smith. I like him in a smoothie.
But on a sandwich, well sure, listen, the comments were split colors of honey, says oh my god, pair and a salad is lit one of my favorite salads feta avocado mix, lettice, walnuts, pears. There you go. Aj Aj says apple on a sandwich. No, but peanut butter and jelly. Yes, what watermelon? Fetta salad? Lisa says, apple on a sandwich is a punishable offense. Well, you've just been blocked, bitch.
So you've prepared an apple sandwich for me?
Have you? I have spent hours in the kitchen slaving away. Let me tell you it's not easy to put apple in a sandwich.
I'm not gonna take hours of slaving for an apple fanmiwich.
Mitchell I found recipe.
Oh this is not like your go to, No, this is my go too. This is the most effort is ever put into anything.
I took photos to prove it to you. I poached chicken breast in salt and pepper. Oh, I'm looking forward to that apple ruin it. No, I add cuby, mayonnaise, salt, pepper, celery salt, and onion powder, white bread. Ladies and gentlemen, I bring to you, Mitchell and Jenna, something that I prepared earlier, the apple sandwich. Wow, so I have one half of the sandwich for you each.
I'm not I don't. I don't know.
You are getting it?
No, why don't you want to try?
I don't eat mayonnaise, and also I don't like white bread.
We don't eat mayonnaise.
No, what's wrong with you? Mayonnaise makes me sick.
Well, I've made you a non mayonnaise site. No you haven't, Mitchell, this is for you, Thank you.
So where where do the apples come into it?
Let me just lift, just take it and investigate.
The rest of it. Looks so fine. But the apples in a sandwich.
You're serious? So describe what you two are seen.
All the apples have all mayonnaise on them.
You've done it very well. It looks like this is not an insult. It looks like a survey sandwich.
Oh, I'll take that.
Yeah, it sounds beautiful.
Yeah, like a chicken sandwich.
Yeah.
Well, the apple is you'll notice it's very thinly sliced because it took me a while to slice, and I had to get a couple of wrong slices to get it right. Because you don't want it to be like, oh, I'm chewing into apple. You just want a little crunch and a burst of freshness, and Jenne, you have to have a bite.
I'll have a bite.
But there's a trash can here if you need it. But for God's sake, leave a little. It's Christmas, it's a last show that. Yeah, have some apple sandwich.
I can't help but notice that you're not having any apple sandwich? Is it because you know it's revolting and trying to fuck with it, sabotaging us.
No, I'll tell you as I made it. I had a full sandwich myself last night about it last night.
I better not get sick before my cruise.
You'll be fine, Jenny. You're gonna get sick on that fucking cruise, all right?
Oh like someone who's prone to see.
No, actually I'm not. I don't get so sick.
Hold on, let's go, they're about to both.
Okay, I'm going to take me bite apple sandwich.
Here.
We got.
M Jenna, get some meat.
You who just had a Nibbleance spat it out.
Jenna.
Mm hmm.
So it's just wrong.
Then chicken and everything else beautiful, but the apple ruins that.
They get a bigger bite. No, I can't go to the middle of mich You've gone to the corner. You're getting apple.
Yes, okay, all right, I'll do one more bite. Open mind, Mitchell, open mind, here we go.
Oh, just the crunch of that as well.
Give me yours, Jenner, I have a bite. I'll have a bite. Open fair, to be fair.
Let me finish chewing.
It feels wrong talking and you try.
Just that sounds of the apple.
Yeah, the apple sounds like it's gone real powdery.
Okay, it's amazing.
Really. My official review is that I can't even taste the apple. Thanks, fuck just quietly. But the texture of it is just so unnecessary. The sandwich is stunning without the apple.
No, I beg to different.
There's no point in including an apple.
Freshness. Got you know what this is? I was born in Sydney. You were born in the country.
I was actually born in Sydney.
You were born in can Stratford upon Avon and a belltowner somewhere. You were used the milk for dinner and then you had lamb stew. I have a refined palette. You've really pissed me off.
You've never struck me as a fussy eater.
Cheers to that.
I just think we should spend a bit more time recognizing the rest of the sandwich. It's fucking gorgeous.
Is yummy without the apple?
I'm very impressed.
Okay, you know what I think this is. This is just a simple case of we have different palettes.
Clearly, I just don't really trust you when it comes to apple and misinformation. Your track record is not good. Not only did you boldly claim that apple's not a fruit, but you've also said in the past apple has the same amount of caffeine as one shot of coffee, which turned out to be complete and ut of bullshit. So I just think when it comes to apples, you don't really know what.
You're talking in midst of a horrific breakup, so thinking.
Zero caffeine, what does the breakup have to do?
It was at the same time that I made that faux pas, which one the apple caffeine?
Who is before?
Now I'm being gassed?
It was ages ago.
I've slaved now I know what my mother feels like. I have slaved over the kitchen all night for you bastards, and and you slapped me in the face with my breakup. You brought it up.
And where the one gets learning him sandwhich is done, thank you. Just wish you didn't have the bullshit apple on it. And I see I can't even You've cut them thath thinly that I can barely taste it.
That's just the texture, that's the point.
Well, if you can't taste it, why pop it on there?
It's cold like it's when they add microhobs some sort of reaction here.
Now, I'm going to peel my bits of apple off the sandwich. You want to add them to yours?
No, I don't. I don't want to that much. Oh you don't even like not that much? No, because I can admit that too much. There is such thing i'll right in this age of apple. Don't tell Tim Cook there's such thing as too much apple?
Right?
So yeah, okay, what am I going to do with these apple bits? I'm not leaving them on my starting sandwich.
Put them in the bin.
What a way?
Oh, that's wasting the apple.
You're going to get me canceled. First it was that missing bitch. Now it's the apple Mitch schmu laughs at kids.
What missing bitch?
Who?
Yeah, you know, damn it.
Enjoy the sandwich, guys.
I'll save the apple bits for the birds out the front.
Yeah, the receptionists have names present time next?
Is it just me?
You can follow the show online, just search a couple of mitches.
If you don't, you're a little bit well.
Who's feeling savage? Yeah?
I'm in a savage mood? Are you a little bit?
Yeah?
I feel like I could. I could go either way. It could be really kind and warm, although knowing me, I'll get pissed off, like if I get a shit gift.
I'm sensing a bit of crankiness from you today. We're about to do Savage Santa. This could tip you over the edge.
It really could.
Excited So, rather.
Than you know, giving gifts to each other like we would normally, we've decided to do Savage Santa this year. Yeah, everyone brings one gift, everyone receives one gift, but we also have the opportunity to steal a gift from someone if we'd prefer it.
Correct.
I think we should all be here for this our fourth wheel roving report, Oscar. Come on in, We're ready for I come on, chicken chock, chuck your present.
On the pile.
Yep, there we go, little boy bus.
Welcome back. Great to have you, Thank.
You, Merry Christmas.
Family's all in, we're all here. Yeah, this is gorgeous.
By the way, Oscar, you can blame Jenna for our Christmas party being ruined because we were going to do the ham raffle for our Christmas party at the Bowler, but I cleared my schedule.
I'm going on a cruise tomorrow, so fuck you.
Yeah, fuck geriatric cruise.
Yeah, maybe we'll have to swap the wheels, jennifor.
Don't sabotage my crew.
We might need to.
We no, I mean like swapping our third wheel and four.
Don't you dare get a promotion. I will cancel my cruise.
I'm not.
No, I don't do that.
It's all right.
Actually sorry.
We were all hoeing into Champagne Oscar, which like some bubble.
Oscar. Would you could I treat you with an apple sandwich?
Yes?
Try it? Try the apple sandwich.
Why not make sure you open up and see where the where the apple? Need to experience the apple.
I just love that it's half eaten, made one.
I paid for the ingredients. I'm not making it a munch here.
I hope you all like this.
Apple. What are your thoughts?
That's not bad?
Thank you.
I actually really liked.
Well, we needed some positivity.
But can you admit you can barely even taste the apple? So what's the point?
No? I think I might finish it.
Please. I think you Oscar is someone with a clear mind. I really like that.
Is your favorite now, but he could fuck you over in Savage Center.
Does well? Can I just say, let's have a moment to pitch ourselves. I think the gift that I got is everyone will love great for adults or children. And I'll be honest. I hate to toot my own horn, but I actually blue budget. Yeah, just a little bit over, but I blue budget. Yes.
Okay, Well, this is how it's going to work, Right in front of me. I've got Mitchell Cheery's Canadian two thanks to our listen NERTRITI if it's sending the so I'm going to draw our names out of a hat, and this decides the order in which we all get to open a present. So if you're picked out first. Unfortunately, you don't have the opportunity to steal someone else's present.
Unless your gift are stolen, of course.
Yeah, someone can steal yours absolutely.
Now are we limiting how many steals? Do we get? One steal each?
Or we can do work?
So once you steal, you can't steal again.
Yeah, no, it has to be one theft. And so the person who's drawn out of the hat last, that's actually the best spot to be in because you've got the pick of all four gifts. You can steal any of.
It, and we can steal our own gift.
Yeah we don't.
I suppose there's no reason you can't.
And we also don't have to admit that it's ours or not. So all right, Mitch's got the twok in his hand.
Okay, I'm drawing the names out of the hat ready.
Jesus, I'm nervous.
I'm scared.
The person opening the present first, Oscar, Oh.
That's only right. You're the back and forth the wheel.
So yeah, alright, so that mean Oscar's going, Oh, should we do it now?
Yeah, we'll get the order. To get the order, I'll get the.
Fool hand back in right, okay, next, Jenna, your second. This is in order of the.
Order of hierarchy.
Well, now let's see. Now, let's see who is Who's Mitchell Cumb's next. So you're gonna be last. You've got the pick of all the presents.
Nothing ever happens in my favor.
This is fantastic.
I'm that pleased for you.
I've got the power.
Okay, so, Oscar, you can pick a present now, just based off the vibe, which one looks the most appealing?
Over walk on over?
All? Right, you can pick any gift.
Okay, he's rifing through seeing what they all like.
You know, I'm going to go. I've decided I'm going to go the big fuck off one.
Wow.
Wait, Mitchell Cherry's big one.
Not that is my box. I can confirm that looks like a big clock or something.
It's very big.
It's probably the size of three steering wheels.
Sorry, I couldn't think.
I couldn't think of something.
All right, here we go, what is it?
What is it?
You know what it is? You have to talk on a podcast?
Sorry, I'm sorry. I just so. We've got the soft archery set. Oh my god, from Uncle Kmar.
It's an archery set.
It is an archery set, and I can see why Jenna would want to steal this.
It would bring it back to you know how Jenna feels about weapons. Yeah, of course, so I just googled it. No, you didn't blow budget at all. It's forty four.
No wrapping paper and this budget. Okay, what are your thoughts on that you want to keep it?
Well, he doesn't have the choice choice, But if I did have the choice, yes, I would keep it. This is spectacular.
Okay, Jenna, your next you get to pick any of the presents.
What do you think I'm gonna go with oscars box?
Okay?
Wow, I'm flatters.
Here we co she's quivering.
It's a vape.
What flavor?
Banana, pomegranate, cherry ice.
They're really chucking every fruit in there.
Pape vape. And then what's that other thing in there?
It's a little unicorn money box?
Here, a unicorn money box?
Yes?
Did you find that the two dollars shot?
Also, Jenna, don't forget you could have stolen the archery set.
No, she's allowed to decide now. She's open whether she wants to keep the vape and the money box or steal the archery.
Do you famously a vape or be save any money? No?
Collect trapnel?
No?
And we did, say, Mitch, we put her in financial ruin this episode. Yes, we did did. Yeah, so your choice, I'd like to steal.
So Oscars ended up with his own gifts.
Well, we don't know. You might want it when you's true?
Wow, honestly, I do think the soft archery set is deserved for Jenna the cruise. If you if you don't take this on the geriatric cruise, I'm going to have the ships.
Wow.
All right, Now it's my term and the only two presents left are mine and Jenne's.
I can't take my own.
No, it's Jenne's. Can you chuck it over here?
Yes? Of course, Here we go.
And you said, Mitch, you observed that this is from a particular show.
I know exactly when they wrapped it.
It is beautiful that day on it.
Where where's that from?
I don't want to know, don't really Okay, alright, I'm opening it up.
Okay, it's beautiful.
You're a gay a cosmetica bright eyes ie mask and creams.
You.
Ah, you've done well, you've done well.
It's a really good one.
That makes that porcel and Unicorn look like fucking shoot?
Do I seem to recall Mitch you said and I'm actually getting a nice present. I'm not getting a joke present You've got and.
I blew the budget on apple sandwich. I don't fuck the people I'm going to get.
Are you sure you don't want to swamp?
Oh my god?
Wait, so Mitchell, you're keeping it for the time being.
Anyway, I actually did just buy a new I cream, so maybe I don't need it because this is just go in my spare pile, my spare creams.
Have you ever considered hunting or saving money?
I'm not considered hunting with suction plugs. No, have you Wait until we take you to bug and we'll show you how the real hunting's done. We'll take your pig and.
Oh my goodness, me, I'm not picking it. Will take your pick and chalk. And I'm really torn. What should I do?
Barga, I'm going to steal oscars. Oh you know it's gonna happen. I'm gonna give you the vape, but then I'm entitled to a puff anytime I lie.
Wow, Oh my god.
Yeah, Okay, I've done my steel so cheery, you're lighter, which means you've only got my presence ue wrap and then you've got your pick of anyone else's if you want to steal it.
Here we go.
I just want to have a look at the archery set. Oh come on mate, can you open it up, Genna while I search the others. I just want to have a sample of the studio glass and Jenna just take it out of the cardboard for me, because I want to test it. And I'm going to have a look at the mecha bride eyes of course, of course, just because I know that I do have the power to steal. Do not want the vape I've never vaped? Is the biggest hydrogel I mask lovely.
Open your present, Cocka.
I'm just putting it on my desk now. Oh, it's actually a big one. This is the big boss.
I would suggest that it's heavier than your archery set, so mine's the big one.
I agree, Mitchell. This is so well wrapped. You put time and care and love into this. Well, let's open. This is the last gift.
And I didn't do a joke present.
It was actually really thoughtful. I'm so well wrapped, My God, you've even wrapped the flaps, Mitchell.
You know me safety first.
On the second?
What what is this?
Oh? No, is what's going on about? My god?
What is it?
It's a twelve months of Mitchell twenty twenty four calendar. Forget the twelve days of Christmas. You've got a photo of me every fucking month of the year. January there is a meat raffle.
That's my meat tray that I wont February.
Is you with our ukulele we optioned off for charity marches you?
Hey, give me no, I'm beeping that. I'maing that story for the book.
Yes, of course, April, is you drinking in wine country?
You have to go through every month? Okay, all right, But it's a calendar with just photos of me.
That's not that's not all, folks. What is this incest incect.
That's a beautiful incests.
Yeah, we've got some gorgeous incestst There's nothing underneath that. I just this is actually my dinnery box. I was being deceptive. I wanted everyone to think that mine's the big present, so I put in a huge fucking box.
Are you sure there's nothing under it?
There's an empty wine bottle because I wanted it to also be heavier. I was just trying to fuck you all over if you pull down the bottom of hidden the wine bottle to make it heavier, to trick you all thinking minds. The big heavy friend.
That is so clever, it's so well thought, it so smart?
Is that though?
Because I thought more people would go for my present, being like, oh it's that big one. It was the last one in the pan.
I really, I really like it.
I thought you were going to call me out and be like, for fux sake, absolutely not the twelve months of Mitchell. Who wouldn't want that? I bet you're both spewing that you don't get to steal it.
I'm disgusted with Actually I am.
This is George.
You want to steal it. They've got a gorgeous I'm.
Asking photo in my my birthday month of July me at your birthday that's yeah?
Oh yes that party?
Yes, sorry I couldn't marke it.
No, that's all right, didn't miss March all right, Okay, big decision Mitchell Kom's calendar.
Oh you're going to steal someone else's gift.
Let me just have a look, because I just feel I just want to feel things.
Okay, the archery that you bought it? Do you know what's going on?
I don't want the archery set, Jenna. I'll be honest. I thought of you when I found this, Jenna.
Whatever happened to you getting it out of the fucking box.
It's still in the box.
I'm not getting it out of the box.
Why, because I'm putting it under.
The Christmas tree at my apartment for the poor childress.
What do you There's a bluey kit and everything there.
Wait, there's a Christmas tree in the foyer, is there?
Do you donate?
Yeah?
That is the most Jenner sentence I've ever heard in my life.
You are so wealthy that you have to create a Christmas tree in your reception for the poor dishevel.
You should see it's full of gifts.
I don't live at Meriton anything.
You're about to live at the parkhad fuck me?
And you're about to go on your geriatric all expenses paid for bullshit cruise. If you're worried about the children, my god, excuse me, he's.
Now helping himself to the cream.
You haven't stolen that, it's not your No, that's unacceptable.
This is a Hello, I'm just putting some you're sampling every present before you decide. How does it look to you can't sample the vape on the podcast gorgeous?
Let me just hold the vape box hold on? Of course, I better not say the name of it. I don't want to get in trouble. And then the unicorn's lovely.
It's a really pretty Unicorn's got a rubber bottom.
Yeah, but that's for the coins porcelain thing. Oho, oh are you kidding me?
What the fuck did you just?
Are you doing?
Kidding me?
He just broke the unicorns so sorry?
Why would you do that?
And I've dropped the unicorn it's everywhere.
I've spent a good sixteen dollars on that.
I'm really sorry.
Well, there's no way you're going to steal it now, don't.
I don't know what to say. Would you like a Mitchell Koone's twenty twenty four calendar? Perhaps?
Look I've just got the head.
Oh that's so sad, You're so stupid Jesus crass.
I've decided I don't want this.
Thanks, I'd already picked out a spot for that unicorn in my home.
Apologies, it was so cute. I'm going to keep the calendar in the incense. I've decided I'm keeping it. Are you yes?
I love this, that's so cute.
I'm going to get a new house in the new year. I'm going to live on my own, so this is perfect to hang in the.
Selfish guess the bathroomthroom because it's because the bathroom is the most visited place for guests, so they'll all see it.
I love it. I'm sold. I love incest as well. I've just gotten into it. We're all just so happy, well done, everybody fucking thrilled.
You know what, Mitchell, Mitchell, I'm breaking savage that I feel really bad that your beautiful, gorgeous unicorn breke. So I think you should have my present.
I'll handle the cards have been dealt. It's all good, all right. Then, Wow, they're going wow.
That beautiful sixteen dollars porcelain unicorn rest in peace.
I love that you also didn't clean up the shards. They're currently at my feet. Any step by take it. It's going to hear a crunch.
Can I just say from my angle, the golden horn is just staring at me like.
Oh, it's been de horned. I don't even know.
Well, on that note, on the d horning and the beheading of the unicorn, we should wrap up the show for the Yeah, okay, this isn't bullshit. You got a mecha skinkke.
I don't look what I was left with.
I have a banana choice.
Do you want the skincare?
I'll give that to my nephew.
Yes, oh really?
Yeah, the poor children will I know that we've already used both of our steels, but is this, you know, breaking the rule?
I mean, Jennet, do you want to do? You want to give the children the vape? I'll say, start him early. I agree, they start their nicotine addiction early.
I've always said that famously. What do you want to do? Jenna?
Oscar's request was good, Mitchell, do you want to swap?
Yeah?
No, we love that, oh gorgeous guy. And I literally just as in two days ago, my new I cream arrived somewhere.
You don't need it, so wait, so wait, no, thank you, so wait, just to just to say, Jenna and I have ended up with the presence we bore.
Sorry. If you want the vague, you may as well have the shattered unicorntext well.
So Mitchell ended up with the shattered unicorn, and Truy got the best one of all. Some beautiful insects, Yes, and Mitchell Coombe's calendar and gorgeous.
Do you really think mine was the best one of them all?
That's a great gift.
Yes, fucking yeah.
I want the calendar to incest.
Can I put it? Can I put a request in for my own calendar?
I bought a few joke gifts to others. There was the demand for the twelve months of mitchell calendar.
Yeah, no, I doubt as soon as I saw it, I thought I wanted.
And then the incests to.
Ever say no to win?
You can't know you.
Can's impossible to no. I'm going to actually maybe re give this to my auntie gift.
Excuse me, I thought you liked him.
She taught me about.
Yeah, everything you know about any says you learn from your aunt.
Of course that On that note, we really should go. Thank you for listening. Merry Christmas, idiots, Thank you for listening for all of twenty twenty three. To all the new fans and all the oldies, we love your idiots all the same.
Also, a shout out to our beautiful idiots who amongst themselves, organized a Chris Kringle squish mellow. So we've played no part in that. That was all unsanctioned, quite frankly, and so they've all just been gifting squish mellows to each other. It's so adorable and there's nothing savage about that.
That's just beautiful.
It's really nice. I almost got they did mystery squish mellow. So it's a squish mellow in a box and you don't know what you're going to get. But I just thought the amount of free airtime we've given that business. I'm not saying it again. No, we're keeping them afly. It's too adorable not to give them a shouted. I love that organize that.
I do love a good marshal.
Listen, stay safe in the break, truly, we'll be back in the new year.
We will. But will you stay safe? You stole the traveler. Look at our tempting someone attack.
I know they could.
I'm going on a cruise, are you?
Yeah?
I really I didn't realize the end of the show. All right, we love you guys, and Mitchell, thank you to you, and Jenna, thank you to you. It's been so much fun doing this a pleasure exactly.
Thank you, and look, thanks thanks guys for having me on as fourth wheel, as roving reporter controbation on probation still just you know what for the end of the year. Thanks for having me.
Of course, of course, Oscar got recognized at gay bar. They said we loved you and is it just me?
Oh? Really, they didn't recognize me from a sucking skills this morning.
Okay, we try. We tried to bring it up to a nice point there, and I love how we almost donated a prize to sick kids at Jenner's reception. Then we went, you know what, fuck them, give it to mother.
I play that card. I give them the broken unicorn that under.
Your tree, pouring the vape under the criassy tree.
Hi, little baby Oscar, we've learned that your life is in tatus, so this unicorn is also in tatus. Will remind you of your shocking baby, Oscar, Baby Oscar, Goo goo ga garden.
Maybe you should take this.
No, no, we've gone back and keep it. You suck your vape, you wash your eye.
And also I've got other stuff for the children.
Oh, of course you do.
I found some books downstairs.
You didn't spend a cent on the kids.
The radio station is doing an end of your prize room clean out, and Jenna took Elton John greatest hit seven CDs because kids love nothing more, just what every kid wants than a CD and Goodbye Yellow Brick Row the platinum alb Over.
Lot of these days wouldn't know what a CD is or Elton John.
No No, but also some books like good Will.
So yeah, because these children haven't had an education, they can't read, but they'll use it as tinder to burn in their fire pits on the streets.
I'm sure these kids want nothing more than a bedtime story in the form of Anthony Colea's autobiography None art.
Sweeter, Merry Christmas, Young Bailey, here's Phil Burton's my story.
It's actually the Marvelous Missus. Maybe you know that show.
No, it's the costume design.
For work, or you never know young theater, or might be an aspiring fashion designer.
They always they always good poverty. Well, yeah, of course, look at Alex Perry.
Who are Merry Christmas? Everyone, thank you for listening. We love you, you love Yeah.
No Mary Christmas.
In twenty twenty four, I have to think about that.
Yeah, Wow, we're back, see you soon, Love you all by back.
Is it just me a podcast by a couple of miches.
Make sure you've hit follow on your podcast.
Welcome to add brief. This is our secret segment on the end, we pretend the shows over. Bet it's no, we just keep talking shit. A couple of people with ADHD having a debrief. Should we actually try and call Sam so that every part everyone in the family, And.
Yeah, I think so. I think that'd be really appropriate.
He does call him and be like, Hi Sam. Oh, the whole teams here. We just wanted to say Merry Christmas and then just hang up before he gets a word in.
Let him have a little bit of a word, but definitely cut him off calling Sam. Is it? Hey, it's Sam.
Sorry, mister Cole.
If you send me a text on this number, it will be way more likely.
That I see it and get back to you. Otherwise, leave a voicemail now.
Nah, goodbye. That's the most Sam voice now Facebook.
Funk, I love Sam, not disturb good Hi Sam, We're on the podcast.
We just thought we'd loop you in for our end of year celebration as a former team member. Oh that's very, very very cray man.
We love you.
Christmas.
Oh well, I'm going home to the FS.
Good nice to catch up.
Nice waffles on though, nice just to hear his voice. Yeah, h.
Do you know what's weird? We insisted on giving Sam a cooked nickname, contraceptive diaphram Sam. She's prize keeper Jenna. Oscar's just Oscar, no roving reporter. Oscar is title chicken children.
Oh yeah, you need a nickname.
I needname.
I believe you's Oscar.
Yeah, you're not oblivious, you're very worldly. You are very You've had experiences. Your favorite vapors is not the stock standard vanilla.
It's true. It's true that that's thelough. I must say, fuck me. I would love a vanilla vape. Can someone get on that it doesn't exist.
I've got a business idea savory vapes.
That actually does exist. But they're foul?
Are they one of the flavors?
Someone gave me a chicken tender vape?
That's huge?
True?
In my defense, I was blasted. He obliterated Oscar glitter pretty blackout, drug blackout.
You're not like me. Where if I have two wines, I get a bit tipsy. There's no, tipsy. You just go from normal, normal, normal, fucked up like it's zero to one hundreds while to get there.
But do you get there?
I'll tell you what though, fuck I'm fun you are? That's true.
An outrageous Oscar.
Ostentatious Oscar. Now that's a limp.
And now let's not lie Olentz.
He's an awful person, is he?
Sorry?
He's vile? I mean, I'm not far off, but like no vile. No, I like obliterated Oscar. I'm always drunk. I'm sitting here hung over.
Oscar. What was the name of that girl that went missing in pri deluge? The little girl I went missing?
You're not talking about Madame mccainn again, Oscar.
You mentioned where it happened.
That count?
Yeah, that count?
No, it doesn't.
Insane though we're not allowed we've implemented a band on any jokes about a particular missing child, and if you mentioned their name, you have to add to like the swear jar of sorts. Jerry ALREADYO is fucking three bars?
Can I just say I was lured into that?
That is true?
I was I was allowed that.
I feel like Mitch, I think that's.
Still the rule.
He broke the fucking Yeah, you technically brought.
Her up exactly, grow up.
Do you want us to make a profit or not. I'm trying to make us make money. Obliterated Oscar, Oscar, Oscar.
You know you're making it currently out of pocket because you fucked in the unicorn.
Yeah, how much of that cost?
Let's be real, I'm not even joking. Fifteen dollars, but that was overpriced for what that is.
I was quite looking forward to when I already picked a spot for it.
I think it's overpriced. I just tripped. Was an accident. We could claim that on insurance if you really want to. That's fine, Like ten of them, I don't think you need to claim it on insurance.
But I'm quite surprised that you enjoy the calendar.
I thought you were gonna be like, oh, Mitchell, No, I love I love a dumb price.
I can't tell you how fucking jealous I am. I want that calendar.
I did well, and my life doesn't happen. I don't get things like my life doesn't happen. If that's how doctors told you you had cancer.
No, that also feels wrong with cancer joke. Wow, given in terminal diagnosis. That's not funny, of course inappropriate.
Yeah, yeah, maybe you should get Oscar to sing that song you tried to get me to sing Into Baby. Do you know the lyrics to Santa Baby? Oscar?
Can I just say Kylie Minogue version?
I can find no making karaoke that he can just say?
No, I want to do the kid. Give me Earth a kid. I love Kylie, don't get me wrong, but nothing Earth the kits just incredible.
I agree with.
Legend icon like Earth is Ship.
No, I'm not. I'm not putting up with that. Not Michael Eartha.
You know Earth the kid is. She voiced Isma in The Emperor's New Groove and she was a catwoman I think nineteen ninety nine.
So this is karaoke?
Yes?
Can I just get lyrics on the screen? Yeah, the one time, the one time, I don't bring my glasses and you.
Can do your barbershop core ten ship all right, ready, fuck.
Hope, I still love a voice, all right.
Boom boom boom boom boom boom bubble.
Santa Baby, just slip a sable under the tree. Fummy been an awful good girl Listanta Baby, so hurry down.
The chim needs a name. God, Wow, that's really good.
I'm so hungover.
I'm going to get one for you, Jenna, I'll get one for me.
I think she could fuck up a rump a pump pump, don't you.
Oh yeah, what's that called?
Little druma boy?
It or drummer boy?
It's it's your type.
Oh yeah, sorry, true, I forgot to give you the name of that twink sauna.
No comment.
See the silence doesn't hit.
What are you talking about?
Your pension for infant?
I'm dating That's not funny. I'm dating a twenty one year old.
So we can tell oh, so we can make jokes about the little girl that fucking got kidnapped and dead, but we can't talk about your fucking twink boy.
Who are you talking about?
I'm not saying her name, his name, it's name.
It's twenty one and he's twenty two in a couple of months twelve, I'm twenty one and a half. Fuck with You met him and you like, didn't you? Very nice?
He's lovely.
I don't have a bad word to say about him and all, but I just I'm going to reiterate a point of mate. When you date someone younger it does give your friend's license to mock.
You also come to.
The territory that when we started this podcast, he was still in school.
Oh my gosh, drama boy plays this sounds like a Laddin ron in pressed. Jesus, Okay, Jenny, this is you?
Okay, Palm pa pum Jesus own came to see Pam.
Fine, just give.
Sweet ring.
Only think of the Deltic version.
To labor before the king par pump pum.
Remember what is rump pump pump palm? Even mean like the drum?
This is it's like on par with dump. Oh, you're true, it's the fucking what do you call it? An automatic paga?
I'm gonna do my favorite. This is my one. Then you think of one, think of one for yourself. Okay, he's mine. I don't know these lyrics, but oh this is a carry.
Okay is this really your favorite? You're kidding?
Fuck?
This is so may.
The first time it's performed.
This is the third time this calendar year, and I'm not going to do it. At least love it one. At least love it one. Bless you. No, They're done on your Flisi does bellise no.
Release every momy please no pero on you you Alisi.
That everyone Christmas I want You're marry Christmas? Your mad Christmas. Not believe brilliant guys, brilliant. I can't.
Sorry. I work retail during the day. Oh God, you hear this ship all day every day joking. I love Celine Dion with my whole boss. But her version of Felice nave Dad I heard in one day.
I've never heard, but I can just picture it.
So much. That is the worst song she's ever done. Can you look it up? There's this particular part where she goes, like from the bottom of my heart and does a fucking Mariah run. But it sounds like she steps like she stubbed her toe.
That imagine?
Can you imagine? I'm not joking. I kept count and I worked a full eleven hour day and it was thirty two times.
Yeah, And I love her. Had version of please we need the Foolice and other dads.
I'm not even singing.
She's with a gospel quod, heavy lifting miture. What's your song? We all sung one?
What do you I think it's gotta be? Oh, she don't even know what it's called. It's the one that's like Merry Christmas war is over.
Oh actually, fun.
Fact I sang that with Shannon No at Caral's in the Domain.
You're kidding.
Yeah, I was in Sydney children Quiet and they booked us to sing carols and Domain, so last minute and we were doing it with Shannon No. And Shannon No was like he was it was him. It was like Shure and No children squiet. And when I tell you he was shocking, I was going to say.
For some reason, you're unlooking a memory. I think I remember seeing that and being like that's shock and Shannon.
Yeah he So we did our proper because we were quiet. So we're doing our proper warm ups and he comes on stage.
Not a ballad kind of guy. No, he go okay though the Biggest Loser theme song.
Ot ironic that they all struggled to do that.
It was so funny because he came on and was like, I'm just going to do some warm ups and his warm ups were yeah, yeah, that's good. And I remember standing there at like fucking eleven years old, being like, what the fuck was he didn't do his red Lolly Yellow Lolly, Like, no.
No, it's not He's not a performer all right, John Lennon, Happy Christmas War is over karaoke version for me.
You should sing it with me everyone, I'll do it to get to the chorus. Yes, hurry up, Oh I meet me.
That's all right, I got this And what have you done?
Another year over?
I'll spa.
A new one. Just begun, everybody, and so says Christmas.
I you have.
The new one, okay, change.
Happy and that it's a good.
One without any.
M's going to be the backing.
This is.
The rich had help which happy the lad The road is so long, Mitchell suit and so happy Quitma.
I'm not married, but you're all that. I can't even hear myself like.
We hope this podcast made you feel at least two percent better today and this year?
That all so water.
Thank you for listening, for catching in the new year.
Mary Creamy four season sayle.
And what wa?
No, I'm just not yet. Don't you.
Hope you had.
Re Oh that cherry gone? Okay, I don't end on that not happen passing repetitive business guys for another two and a half minutes.
I've had that from not.
See you next year?
Do you love your ce Christmas podmap?
Is it Just Me, a podcast by a couple of mechas.
Make sure you've hit follow on your podcast app.