#103: Top 5 Easter Chocolates

Okay, Hi guys, canna hear it?

Yeah?

Hi, Before we get into the episode, we just wanted to let you know that right at the start, when the episode begins, we're going to be doing another one of these gas line We are gas lighting Jenna. You know, we like to make our third wheel feel like she's losing her mind a little bit. It's all harmlessly, but.

It's all consensual. She doesn't know what's coming though.

Yeah, this time we're going to be gas slighting her into thinking that we agreed to give each other Easter presence.

Ye kind of like Secret Santa, but it's Secret Bunny.

And so we're going to make her think that she was meant to give me a present and then make her feel guilty for forgetting.

And we actually have chocolates. You'vet chocolates for me, and I've got a Ferraro shared chocolate for her.

Yeah, so we're going to pretend that, Yeah, I pulled Mitch Cheery out of the hat. You pulled Jenna, and she pulled me, And where the fuck is my presence? Where's my Secret Bunny present? Oh? We're evil? So yeah, just giving you a heads up that that's what's going to be happening right at the start of the show.

Enjoy it, people do some weird shit. Would you like to try evape? Why would you take up something? Are just going to be addicted and expensive?

I think that people.

I'll tell you what.

Yeah, because you're young and stupid.

Some things make more sense than others.

You mentioned that your goal was to be healthy, and I just don't know. How can you figure that's going to happen when you're ordering a chocolate moose?

No, you know, I had it in the car on the way home and I didn't have a spood, so I was like an hour of Dillo trying to get ants out of a hole.

I was bless yourself for the rude shocks of young adultshood.

Being fingered as an awful sensation given be thinking about, right person? Goodness?

May this is?

Is it just still to play a couple of mitches?

Hi, it's Jenna.

Please don't forget to include my name in the opener this season.

Sorry? No, he is Michulli and Mitchell koon Oh, Hello, everybody, one O three is here? Mitchell Kohon It is it too early to say Happy Easter?

No, it's definitely not too ill to say Happy Easter, especially considering I thought we should jump right into.

Secret funny secret Bunny.

Yes, it's our last episode before we take a bit of an Easter.

Break, So it's our secret Bunny.

You know how we were saying last week, we're going to do similar to Secret Santa. I don't know if I've heard of Secret Bunny before.

I think we coined it. I'm happy to claim it. I think it'll catch on.

It works because everyone gives one gift, and then everyone receives one gift.

I've got choccol Are we allowed to tell each other who we got?

Yes?

I remember last week all three of us price Keeper dinner included Yes, Yes, we pulled out a name out of a hat. Yes, I mean I got you Mitchell, So I got you your Easter President Salon. I know that you're a fan of a feast, so you know I got you quite a big show here.

It is.

It's a big ass Cadbury thing because I know you prefer that over red Chuler.

I love Easter.

Yeah, excellent Easter assortment, milk duck and why thank you. Yeah, it's a big mix.

I know that you always have family functions, so I figure that can be your your thing when told not to bring a thing.

Oh, the churies will scot that down a second. And I got Jenna, So I've got Jenna's.

There you go. You've got Jenna.

What is going on?

Happy Easter?

There you go, Jenna, there's yours?

Hey, Hey, the Ferrero Roche.

I mean, it's no mystery who Jenna got? Then I'm the last one left.

So you've got an.

Easter present for me?

Jenna? Not genius, is he? I'm your secret bunny.

We never discussed this secret bunny.

We did it last week during one O two? Didn't Oh God, put it out of a hat.

It's fine, Jenny. You always forget things unless I remind you.

Did you actually not get me children?

Maybe she just didn't understand it last week when.

I bungle up rule all the time. No one's out there? Well she's running out.

Now she panicked that much? Why okay, did you just try and rob someone a there?

It's a rober staff member of a Bilbie.

I gifted him a Bilbi.

So you forgot to get you knew who you were buying for. You pulled it out of the hair.

Now I'm one of your oldest friends, dearest.

I'm so confused.

This was your eye, dear.

You sent it in the group chat.

It's a cute name, but I don't know.

This is because she was at big w and she said, do you think Mitchard like this? So I said, you know, we're not meant to know who gets you.

Oh yeah, that spoiled it.

When was that you messaged me on Thursday?

We drew them out of the hat last week?

Oh my god, we'll give me the Ferrara roche back. Then, that's disgusting.

No, you have your chocolate. I'm used to missing out, poor Mitchell.

Yes, yeah, oh.

That's where you're wrong. I thought that was the hilarious.

That wasn't funny.

You don't.

I really had a heart attack.

Did you think you had early on set? Wherever that is?

She said that before, so she recognizes the symptoms. Now you don't get to keep the chocolate. They're on layby.

We have to send them back, give them back.

Yeah, imagine if you could rent eat the chocolate that's for props. I'm sure you could.

Well.

They just gave one of the news readers of Bilbi that.

Oh and did you found where is wrong with you? Where did you find it, Amanda? Oh, they get to send much free shit in the hopes of Amanda Kella will cry about it on air.

Jenna's like Peter Pan. She steals from the rich and then gives to the poor news reader. Yeah.

Those poor news readers not on enough, so I.

Thought I'd have to steal it off him again.

We got your happy Easter, everybody.

Thanks for these. Chock you so much. Jenna committed to the gag. You actually got presents. Yeah, would you here?

You go? Now, I'm gonna diet. It's all good, Okay.

You know what I thought. Mitch's legs looked fantastic when you walked in there.

Good the nice legs.

Thank you.

We've got good legs.

Yeah, it's all I got going for me. That would be sad.

That's why. That's why I'm a bit frightened about heading into winter, because I've got to cover my best asset to keep warm.

I'll risk the pneumonia to keep the pins out. It's all good. They're not your best ass You've also got this show. Let's go, everybody.

Welcome to the show. If it's your first time listening, this is it just me. Every week we start the show the same way with something we've noticed, something we hate or appreciate, we should gas like Jenna one week. Every week we start the show the same way with two political takes, and then start it with two political takes.

As you know, we start the show the same way every week with Jennet's political wrap up, Jenna, what's been happening?

As you know, we start the show the same way every week since the Ukraine crisis, Jenna wraps up what's going on in the Sea of Bey route Jenna.

Yeah, So we start with the two is it just means? And then also what have we got coming up? Gas light Jenne? We did that tick, and then we've also got Jenna's junk.

It's j rat.

That's where all our worst ideas come back to bit its. It's always a bit chaotic. That one.

We're not gas lighting you, Jenny. You know that's happening.

And also I've got a bit of a show and tell myself really, because you know how we love we love ads on this show, we're always talking about iconic of the ads. Well, I've got something that is just so messed up. I can't wait to show you. It's very dark, it's very our humor. I can't believe I didn't know these ads?

Is it just me? Too?

Is an ad in itself and we didn't plan this, Mitchell. It's not that we're playing on kiss and WSFM, which I didn't realize.

Genoy, you work that.

I've been sent more than a dozen times.

Which you wanted to get it over and done with. Now, okay, yeah, yeah, let's start.

Welcome to the show everyone, First digym of the day.

Is it just me?

Do you not think that this ad sounds anything Laura Flora?

It's me from Sansas.

Flora Flora.

It tastes Greek too, Flora, No, that could easily bear you. What's Flora Flora?

Is the butter or the margarine spread that's made with sunflower seeds?

Unpopular opinion. I much prefer marjarine over butter.

I know it's spreadable, You're right, I use it because it's good for my heart, but I prefer the taste of butter.

Butter the taste, yeah, but spreadability wise Flora. Yeah.

Didn't someone post in our Facebook group as you're an idiots? They said, oh does Mitch voice the new Flora at and I it could easily have been you, because they do often drag you into the recording booth here at the radio station to get you to do things. I've heard you doing all sorts of things on air, like Santa, Merry Chris. What else have they gotten you to do?

I've been Santa obviously, the famed cash cop the Morning Carland. I haven't heard casod.

Age and other of us coming out. Nice Rack. Sorry, he hasn't been around that. He doesn't social cubes. What's going on in Ukraine? He doesn't know, he doesn't know, he hasn't been around.

I love Harbye Weinstein in the movies. No, the cash cog is not work at all.

It hasn't been out since it's all happened, you see.

Oh god, so you know that very much sounds like you, and it sounds like something that you'd be roped into doing.

One more time. Really, it's very funing now you do it.

Yeah, Flora Flora thing for me and Flora me me, me, me me, it's maa, Oh.

My god, Flora Flora, it's me. That's me.

Yeah. Wow.

Am I getting paid enough that I could do that? I could take his job?

All of a sudden, I want to rush up and buy Flora.

It's really working.

We shouldn't be missing in these brandage.

Is it just me?

I think I'm easy to do an impression of though before we move on, I think I think.

I'm an impression of though.

Shut up, it's a high register. I've never heard anyone doing Mitchell Coumb's impression, have I.

Actually it's quite frustrating now.

And see you want to go stuff. No it's hard because no think about it. You want to go up, but you're lower than me.

Yeah, this is this is where a lot of people get confused because they think I've got a high pitch voice. But it's actually just a feminine tone. Like I speak lower than you you do, you speak higher. So if you had to on a piano, if you have to find the keys where our voice sits, mine's technically lower down on the piano. Yes, it's because I've got such a feminine tone that everyone thinks, oh, he's.

Got a high pitch boys, and because I'm such a beautiful, sexual, top masculine man that can go he's got.

A Even though you really high pitch, this is your tone, it disguises it as being man. It'd be like it'd be like you playing a high note on a trumpet and me playing a really low note on a flute, but because it's a fucking flute, it still sounds more dainty.

Yes, I get you. All right, Well, I'm going to put the call out, ladies and gentlemen, if you think you can do a Mitchell Kumbs hold on, let's do it. Let's just put the call out. If you believe you can do it, impression of Mitchell Coobs. Hit us up at couple of mitches and we will get you on the show when we're back.

I'd be very surprised if someone comes through it, because I've done it before on an Instagram. Who could do an impression of me? And like maybe two people bothered and it was not even close.

All Right, the call out is Outloaders and gentlemen, if you can do a Mitchell Cub's impression, hit.

Us up at couple of midges on Instagram? Is that where the hitt gets up? Yeah?

Great, okay, wait for.

That, all right, you're ready for yours?

Mitchell? Yeah sure, hit me jump in back?

Is it just me?

Whenever you're back at home at your parents' place, do you instantly relapse into being a child.

Oh my god, it's like I never left. I walk in the door, drop my keys, put on a nappy.

I'm like, I had to wipe myself. That's their job now.

No, it's like I just forget everything I've learned whilst living out of home and fending for myself for the last seven years, maybe even eight years.

I've lost count. But yeah, I've been an adult for quite a while.

And as soon as I go home, which I'll be doing for Easter, back to bogen Gate.

I'm just like, Mom, how long do I put this in the microwave for I.

Just forget everything it's on the package? Yeah, Or like, Mum, can I open this? Like I just find a packet of something?

Can I open this?

Oh?

That is the mum?

Can I? Mummy?

Are using this just for anything?

Do you have any snacks?

Yeah?

I'll open the cupboard, which is quite clearly full, and I'll go is there anything to Yeah?

Like, I just need her to make the division for me.

I'm really critical, I goes, you guys really lost it since I left, just because I had all the fat food in the fridge. Yes, I do the same. I also have to make my bed now as an adult in my house with Hayden, and I.

Guess, did you make your bed?

Yeah?

I never use.

Yeah, yeah, wow.

I don't do it even though I know how to do it, and shure. I'm like, no, that's the luxury of this hotel.

No.

She my mum would try and make my bed, but like, you're gonna do it wrong. Just let me do it.

Yeah, but don't you also think it's kind of like mums and mums and mums more so want to do it because it's like we miss our babies.

Oh yeah, she got really upset with me one time.

Thick, I'm I'd have told this theory before.

But anyway, I occasionally, if I ever went home, I'd bring my washing basketfull of dirty laundry with me and then she'd put it in the wash do the washing for me.

And then one time I came home and she's.

Like, where's your washing? And I was like, oh, I don't have any air did alone before I came. She's like, my boy doesn't need me anymore. She really really was so upset with me.

I can solve myself if you really want to.

I'll just chuned her on this white shirt. Yeah, you're welcome. Is it just me?

You should follow these idiots online search.

A couple of mitches.

If you don't, you're a little bitch.

Okay, we hand the show over to you, the listeners at this point every week with an is it just you?

Mit and I both have done our is it just me?

Now?

It's your ten.

If you want to get on, you just have to dms at a couple of meters on Instagram and you can jump on the phone send us the voice message up to you. What have we got today?

Harry has set this on Instagram's voice message. Let's go. This is Harry's Is it just you?

Is it just me? Or does it feel like an eternity since we last had an episode from you?

Guys? No, what We literally do episodes every week just you, Harry, And thanks to you, Harry, You're the reason we're taking a break. Yeah, we're just having a bit of time off over Resa. This is it just you?

Would have made sense after that. You've been doing weekly episodes for ages.

Mitch and I were talking this morning. You know what, Let's skip east to break.

Thanks to you, Harry. Yeah, it's a podcast. You can get it on demand whenever you want.

Yeah, true.

Is it just me? Hope they stop making episodes of smash?

Yeah, they have. It's done.

Sorry, Jenne, is that your phone? What's that old show?

Beers All? If your phone goes off on it, you have to buy everyone a case of beer.

No, it's not my phone going off. Remember I said I have to do the work experience thing to my alarm?

Where are you doing work experience?

No it's not me.

I'm teaching Jennet pet Barn. Don't judge her. She wants to get involved with Hermit Crabs.

The CEO's son.

Are you leaving mid podcast?

Yeah?

I have to What are we gonna do about Jenner's junk?

Yeah?

We have a whole Jeni's junk to do. You can't. Yeah, what's your one segment?

I definitely wasn't told about this. I did not know this is something.

Sorry.

I thought you said it was midday.

No, it was originally.

We can't wait. Why don't you just know what work experience is important?

So you better go be with him because I remember being left in the corner doing nothing at work experience and it was fucking so harrowing.

So yeah, go teach him.

True, Mitch and I both did work experience with Ben Fordhaman, we still connect to him. You want to be able to have this kid call you in ten years and cough at you down the phone.

Can you come back or can you just will block areas?

Can you just voice all of the Jenna's junks now and I'll edit them in later.

Okay?

All right?

Yeah blah la la la la, we won't hear it. Okay, great, Off you go, Jenna. Okay, so, yeah, what a mess. I know what if you'd think it should be organized.

These things can so easily be dealt with off air rather than having to happen on the podcast.

But here we are. Sorry, thanks Jenna. Bye. Yeah you know what? Bring him in maybe?

Yeah, well I don't think that's a good idea.

Other way she won't.

You know how it's working thirteen thirteen.

You know what he did.

He's because his dad is the CEO of ARN, which is WS, which is KISS, which is everything, and he doesn't know where he wants to work, so he's doing all the different departments. So he sat on My Breky show the last two days and yesterday on air. I dared him to go to his dad's office and get the company card and buy me a bacon and neck roll.

And he did it.

He did it.

He's impressionable. He's very sweet.

Oh okay, I can't walk all over that. No, all right, what are we doing now?

Well, Jenna, Jenna is going to miss these brilliant ads that I wanted to show off today.

Oh god, So you know how we love a good ad podcast, our bread and Butter really.

Whether wear shit, canning ads or you know, doing our favorite ads. We've talked about the many, many times, and I've just discovered, Oh, these ads are about to show you. They're iconic for all the wrong reasons.

Right.

They used to air in New Zealand. My friend Andrew from there. He was telling me about them the other day. They are so fucked up. So what they do in these ads is they tricky when thinking that it's a normal ad. So it might be someone saying, oh, and that's why I buy wheat pics, but then halfway through the ad, the person just has a dreadful accident and then it turns out that it's actually an ad for accident compensation.

So that's very smart. Yeah, they're acc think safe ads and it's just so wrong.

The Catfish ads.

They are They click back.

You into thinking it's one thing, and then it's actually they have a fucking horrific accident.

Yes, so I'll show you.

The first one. This guy he's doing an ad for paint, or so we think he's painting his house, and then falls off his ladder.

Okay, here is first one.

The job's worth doing, It's worth doing that.

That's why I use new solace. Here blows on like.

A dream, protects against.

Oh, preventing falls around your home, securing your ledder.

It's so graphic. You see him fall and basically break his back, and then.

And then he hold on. Then he moans and groans, and then there's a tight shot of the paint pulling out like blood.

See what I mean? Like that is so dark.

I didn't even hear the voice over. What the fuck was it for?

Go back?

Hold on? How do you wind it?

Yeah? Okay, this is the end.

But the voice of it just sounds like he's guilt tripping this guy for having an accident.

Yeah, idiots, don't put the live spots.

It's just preventing falls around your home can be as easy as securing your letter.

I guess it is. I mean I guess, and then it gets worse.

Yeah.

So this next one, I'm going to show you. There's there's a mum walking around her land. She's doing an ad for Fruity Bara.

Don't tell me. I want to be surprised. I just want to know.

Okay, we reveal the horrific accident afterwards.

I'm sure you'll be able to hear it.

Yes, add number two.

Kids of energy, but they need the rights next to keep them going.

That's why I give my kids pretty buds.

That fool.

Preventing trips around your home as easy as tidying up toys.

She fell into a glass coffee table out of nowhere.

Sorry, she tripped into a King Furniture sold glass.

Coffee table, and then you can eat her like whimpering. Afterwards she's like, oh, it's so wrong, while holding the music bar while her kids play in the backyard.

My friend who grew up in New Zealand says it just gave all of us anxiety because every ad we'd be wondering, fuck is something awful going to happen?

Halfway through and.

Then there's a drone shot from above the ceiling with this woman groaning while she's got glass in her abdomen.

What was the what was the voice over this time?

That's why I give my kids pretty bus.

Preventing trips around your home can be as easy as tidying up toys.

Oh, she just tripped on a little Tonka truck.

Bitch gets shamed for not cleaning her house. O.

It's a man's world. Clearly thinks safe.

If Nancy really loved her children, she would have cleaned to her house safe. I also want to say, guys, the way she wails before she thought she's ready, it's gold.

Pretty bus, close up on the Tonka truck spin easy as tidying up toys.

Word, that's awful. Is there a third one yet? The last one said?

This guy he's doing an ad for home lines because he's moving out.

Okay, of course, I do you want me to not to spoil. It's better when you don't spoil.

It's better. Because I did not see that woman head budding a fantastic furniture coffee table.

The whole body fell through the glass coffee table. I just feel like that shit doesn't happen.

Okay, sorry, add number three, let's go wrong.

There's one homelane that's pre approved so you can move into your new home faster.

There's no fat It's totally flexible.

So if your lifestyle changes, spell.

Down the stairs, fell down a flight with his leg.

Oh, preventing trips around your home can be as easy as taking care on stairs.

It's bent backwards. Yeah, they showed his broken leg.

Oh and I.

Knew it was coming too, because he was walking near the stairwell. See what I mean. That's so messed up.

Imagine if we.

Did that bullshit in Australia. You couldn't get away with that.

Imagine how much worse my anxiety would be as a human if that's the ship we grew up watching.

Oh my god, one hundred percent.

I'm constantly worried something's going to go wrong.

I imagine if we get it on the radio, Like imagine if god Ford been what we spoke about before, it's been shot and killed. Oh god, what.

About if there you know those Amy Adds at the Wondering and Catot they're just on the beach and there's a fucking tsunami just halfway through.

I love you like a sh Imagine if have you seen that not happy jan ad?

Yeah?

Iconic?

Yeah, can you find that on YouTube. Yeah, imagine it's halfway through that. Do you have a car crashing sound effect? She sits yelling at Jan out the window, not happy Jan. And then Jan just gets hit by a car.

And she'll forever live with guilt.

Yes she would. Those were her last words before jam.

Ready hold on.

Jan, famous as who's not add.

In the Yellow Pages directory?

Jan. It's like, oh, it's going to run away.

The boss is going to yell at me.

Jane's running out of the office just to go home, running through the street.

Happy, Oh, crossing the road can be easy as looking to us.

Oh my god, it's just played next on YouTube. You know this ad? This is famous. It's muted, unmuted? Oh sorry, sorry?

Oh god, the dad?

Why did they make a great all China? I was not expecting that. You really have to catch them off guard, Jim Smelly left untrimmed. What about it keeps playing big Aussie ads, you know those like infomercial kind of ads that happen like brand power helping you buy better, I'll get that chicken the supermarket. Imagine the shelf, just the roof collapsed above the whole ceiling cave in. You've got an earthquake sound.

Effects on earthquake, Yeah, I sure we have nothing surprises me with your sound effects board, I've got them all. Oh my god, how long have they been doing these brand power ads?

Oh my forever?

I used to you search it on YouTube. It looks so old. Look it's one from the nineties. Where are the new ones? Here?

We got Belvida brand Power. I actually buy Belvida, So let's see. Let's see what they're flogging on Belvida.

She's in the shopping center.

Breakfast gives us energy to kickstyle the day, but fitting it into our morning routine can be the hard part. So try Belvita breakfast biscuits, Belvisa breakfast biscuits.

She's in thee tasty waiting the ceiling's coming down.

You'd need her going in the background too to make it really like these New Zealand ads.

What about.

God?

No, this is fucked.

You know how you've got the traffic reporters up in the helicopters. What are the helicopter it's usually on like Channel Tan, like in the chopper. How don't they do the ones here is.

The eyes in the sky. You can get one up right now, of course?

Yeah, Oh easy, we've got the of course, you've got a traffic reporter sound effect. Flooding has closed the north, the wind the road.

Just down to the bridge.

Flight safety training can be.

Oh my god, Microsoft flight simulator, it could save your life. And I've got one ready. What about I love this ad growing up. It's actually one of my favorites. My dad loved it to.

What is it the good guys?

Oh yes, I remember that this is the original. They're in the store getting ready sell to the people. Snow blazon. It's in the middle of a blazer.

They're like, oh, our acorns are that good? Oh well, plizzand I ever pleasant sound of it. What would you ever need that? I've got plenty for days like today. That's fine. You see what I mean when I said this is dark enough that it kind of works for our humor.

I think we're dumb.

We've gone more and I found one more sound effect please and I know just the shew.

Of work perfect?

Oh my god.

Okay, yeah, this.

Is everyone's tuning in Channel nine to what's their favorite show. It's the Box, It's Scotty Cam's Scotty Cam on the roof.

What's gonna happen to Scotty. They're on the work side, in the middle of all the Rennolds.

It's going to be a good episode.

I mean, he's a gentleman. Welcome to the poor.

Hold on, No, Scotty has fallen into the woodship's probably we're still talking his head.

He's down, Scott's gone. Yeah, see, I told you it's messed up.

Yeah, that's fucked.

Weould all be draumatized if we grew up in New Zealand.

Yeah, that's awful.

What can we do with an ad for Huggy's nappy? No, I draw the line? Is it just me?

The rude shocks of young adults?

Food?

Okay?

Oh god?

After that?

What are we doing now?

I'm still I'm still recovering Jenne's junk, all that worse ideas.

Oh my god. Without Jenna here though, we've got a Jenna Bot in her place. Yeah, I'll make a Jenna Bots a throwback.

I know.

Let's do it.

Jenner's jaump, everybody, let's take it off, turn it off. What are you doing back? I'm here?

Oh where'd the kid go?

What are you?

Is he even here?

Yeah somewhere?

Why'd you part him?

After someone else, Well, I don't know what's happening.

You, Jenna.

You can't do that when some of the work experience, you've got to make account for them.

You were a work experienced kid once at.

They used to show. Yes, that's correct.

You have to look after baby.

That is so weird.

She literally walked in as you were playing the opener.

What were you doing?

You just missed the most fucked thing.

Are you a fan of Scott a Cam Yeah? He's dead.

Yeah, No he's not.

Yeah, he fell into a wood chipper.

Yeah. Anyway, you're just gonna have to listen to the episode, yeah, to find out. We've already pre recorded your bits for Janice Junk, So if you want an early mark, you can leave where you can just do it.

Now you're telling me before we do a Jena segment, we're going to do a Jeni segment.

Do you want to do your segment or do you want to not do your segment?

I have to check on him.

Concern on the kid.

Why did you come back then?

I was curious. I didn't want to miss it.

You missed it, So do you want to do your segment on not?

Oh? Give it to miss Okay?

Why did you bother coming back?

Just wasted our time again?

Sorry, I was I was really curious. I feel left out.

Do you want to stay for it? Want to say for it on that? Okay?

Then go so yeah bye, good luck.

With a kid, thanks, no way, fuck me.

This podcast needs to be such a well oiled machine, Jenn you can't really well actually, yeah, it's been really great.

Yeah, no interruptions.

All right, let's do it.

Let's do a segment.

Let's take a peek at Jenna's junk, shall we.

So whenever we think of an is it just me to bring up on the show when we think, actually that's a bit shit, I don't like that one, we put it in Jenna's junk. And then, yeah, we fished through the junk every so often. We need to do a cleanse for our Easter break, don't we. But actually doesn't mind her junk being full, so.

No, and she's very generous to let us do it on the show. Yeah, have to play these, right, aren't we. Jenner's is just us that we prerecorded earlier in the show.

Yeah, Jenner Bot, if you like, let's go there. I actually like agenda that we can puppeteer.

We can controller. Yeah, true, All right, let's do the first one.

Is it just me? Or do tea companies need to be more explicit with their caffeine levels?

Ah, that's a me one. That's a cheery Now do you agree?

Do you know what? I don't know what you mean. You're gonna have to elaborate.

I just find if something has caffeine in it. Tell us, Because sometimes I want tea as an alternative to coffee, and I drink it. I don't realize that. And I wanted eleven o'clock at night, or I wanted ten o'clock and I don't want to stay up, and I have to search the back and oh, Rue Boys, black pea and caffeine free in the smallest writing stick. It put a sticker on it.

Guys.

I thought that my assumption has always been and I could be wrong. It happens occasionally. I've always thought that most tea is caffeine free, except for like English breakfast.

No, if most teas are full of caffeine. Really, the only uncaffe added teas are the ones that are explicitly uncaffeinated.

You like the sleepy time ones.

Yes, but that's why I write this down, because I went and bought a sleepy Time tea from a health food store full of caffeine.

What redundant? Oh, for God's sake, it's like getting petrol. It doesn't actually work in your car.

Yeah, it's like buying a burger and they didn't clarify that it's actually made a play.

Yeah, you can't eat it? Yeah, fucked in yep.

Piss me off. Tea companies. If you're listening Lipton or dil Mar, put a sticker on it.

I don't drinking now, Lipton, what do you have that's full of caffeine? Now that's why I'm drinking it.

See in an English breakfasty it makes sense in the morning you want the caffe any but I feel.

Like it's drastically less caffeine than in a coffee. You're probably fine, there is there is there.

You know, it's full of bubble tea too in boba like it has full of caffeine. Yeah. Fuck, I know. And the more you know, everyone saved your life. Yeah, all right, what's the next one?

Is it just me? Or did you think DNA tests would be a bigger part of your adult life?

Oh? Yeah, that was me. I really thought that a DNA test was something that I was going to have to deal with at some stage. They make it out like in the movies, like it's so common practice, like I got to get a DNA test? Fine out of that kid's mind, yeah, or like, oh get a DNA test?

Are you my real father? Like they just make it sound like it's so easy.

Can you just pop into the chemist like a rat test and just get a DNA test? Where would you even start if you wanted a DNA test?

Now?

Idea?

And does DNA even look like what it does in the movies, like that we little twisty ladder feet. Oh yeah, I bet it doesn't. I bet they're lying to us.

I've got no clue, to be honest, I've often thought of suggesting that my brother get a DNA test because he looks nothing like me or my sister. And I'm like, oh, Jane, well, the fact that I was so hard to conceive and they had to do other methods, you know, I'm a test to baby, and you know, very difficult for my parents to conceive another child, and then all of a sudden, this blonde fucker shows up. I'm like, Jane, oh, you were doing the dirty so maybe I should look into these DNA tests.

That's why you sew into the DNA. This is something to be in it. Your brother is very handsome. I saw a photo him on Instagram.

That's what I mean.

He can't be my father's. It does look like your mum. All right, let's see.

Is it just me? Or is outing someone from doing a Pooh the worst thing you could do to one?

This is very topical. This is me.

I never do it because I think it's awful.

No, I agree. You know when someone's doing a pool you just know it.

Do you, though? Because I just genuinely don't think about it. I don't care how long someone's been gone. I just don't think about it.

I'm aware of it. No, I know, I can sense it. I did it this morning because I'm doing the breakfast radio show filling of a Caryle and Jackie Oh at the moment, and my hours are ridiculous, So my morning Pooh that normally hits me at eleven is hitting me at like five thirty am, right because I've had two coffees by that point. And I went out and I pre recorded some radio and then went to the talk to do a pool. Came back and they went, how's your poo? Don't out me?

Oh no, that off's the worst for this. They always used to do.

That, like, ah, you went and did a shit, didn't you. And I just started being like, yeah I did. Yes, everyone shit, you have.

To own it.

And I went, you know what, it was fantastic. Yeah, but old meat. Maybe I'm five years ago. I would have been old night.

In poo, night in poo.

But why why am I defending my poop?

Yeah? No, I've noticed that my friends always if they do a shit at my place, there's a few of my friends that always try and cover up that they did it because they might have been gone in the bathroom for a while. Yeah, and they'll come out and be like, oh my god, I just like, was sitting there watching tiktoks.

I just got you know, I just got distracted.

Oh my god.

I was sitting there for eight and then I was like, oh my god, I forgot. I'm on the toilet.

I'm like, babe, I don't need the elaborate fucking hysterics like, I don't need it.

I don't care if you're shitting. I don't even notice you were missing. I've gone this far sometimes just to lie. Oh, that's so unlike you too, that's really out of character.

I'll say, oh, I ran into Steve in the hallway, like a Steve Dharty year ago. Do you know in Australia in America, you would never say, oh, I'm just gonna go to the toilet. You know, in Australia, we go I'm gonna go to the toilet, which just means you might need you might need to wash your hands.

What do they say the restroom the restroom or the washroom?

The washroom the washroom.

For them, the toilet is the singular item. That's like me going, oh, I'm just gonna go to the sink instead of the kitchen. They think, why would you like, why would you single out the toilet?

That is weird, Like, Ah, I'm just gonna go to the chair.

I'm gonna tell I'm gonna do the American version. You tell me where you think where you think I'm going.

Okay, all right, I'm just going to go to the counter, the bench. I don't know.

McDonald's.

Oh, all right, we're being that little, are we. Yeah, I'm just gonna go sit in the driver's seat.

You go to the car, yeah, yes, that's better.

You know what I mean, like, shut up a miera. Yeah, they don't like being specific, very broad. I think it's very Australian to just be very literal, especially Melburnians. Have you noticed they don't even call Melburnians. People in Melbourne don't even call sausage sandwiches sausage sandwiches. They call them sausage in bread like absolute idiots.

No, they don't call morning morning, they call it son up first, All right, what's the next genistund?

Is it just me?

Or?

Have you ever wondered what you call a non binary aunt or uncle?

I was just thinking about this the other day because I'm like, what if someone is gender neutral and they use they then pronouns, because aunt or uncle that applies to a male or female.

Specifically, like I'm an uncle.

But what if you're non binary you don't identify as either, what do you call them?

Well, uncle has masculine or male connotations. Oh that's really interesting. Would you call don't bring this back again, what it's not fucking gunkle?

No? No, because that's also uncle, Like would you call it? Oh my god? Did you call a lesbian auntie a lanti.

Or a bisexual aunt, my bunty, But like, I don't know what else you call it? If you're removing gender from it, is it like instead of a grandparent, like, oh my grand cousin? Do you call a non binary aunt or uncle? Hey, Jenna, can you google it?

Oh?

Wow, what a shame.

Idiot you call a non binary?

Do we have any friends that are of the show that identify as non binary?

We can ask?

Oh, my god, surely this isn't correct. One gender neutual term that has become increasingly popular is pibbling.

Oh. Pibling can refer to either an aunt or uncle and is modeling on sibling blended with P for parent. Oh my parent sibling pibbling? Yeah, your parents sibling? Oh pibbling.

Mitchell pibbling, Mitch is here, and then your gay pibbling is gibbling.

Oh fuck, giblings. I've never heard pibbling before, Mitchell, it's not real. What's the website? It's probably pink news, dictionary dot. Can't you know what I have a beef with? I say it.

I'm trying to unlearn. It is, ladies and gentlemen, because it is. Yes, it's the binary. It's feeding the bunny and I say it all the time.

Yeah you do.

But I don't think that's like an evil thing that you do. It's this habit.

Really, it's um learning that. Yeah, I'm not doing it intentionally.

You're not, you know, excluding people on purpose.

I'd throw myself into a wood chopper if I was doing it intentionally.

How dare I alight? What's the next one? Go, Jim?

Is it just me? Or do we need to rethink street lights?

The only reason I say this is because I was picking up Hayden from the airport the other day.

And where did he come back from?

Oh? My god, the poor fall Queensland.

Finn Off Queensland.

Oh he hired a catamaran with five of his closest friends. I was meant to go, but I couldn't caause I was on air and it was the rainiest Queensland has ever had. Rainiest month a Queensland. Oh fuck, that poor little thing wanted to get a Suntannd anyway, the street lights I picked him up. Yeah, back to the street lights they are. It's actually adorable, Mitch, normal street lights. How Toldrick?

There is that twenty meters probably twenty five meters actually, oh yeah, maybe twenty five.

For the international listeners. Twenty five meters ten feet street light is a light on the side of the road that needs your path, my loving partner. The streetlights are a quarter of the size Apple airport. Yeah, they're probably just taller than me.

I've never noticed.

It's the cutest little streetlights ever. And I think we need to rethink street lights because sometimes I want to look at a cute streetlight. I don't want a gangly long poll thing. They're ugly. Street lights are hideous.

Actually, can you vamp for a bit? I'll just go on street on street view.

Oh okay, that's that's a good idea. Google street View. Why are we looking at streetlights?

And gona put up behind you? Ready, you'll be able to see it Google street View, Google Maps. I was because there's a Krispy Krem near here.

Oh is it? Oh?

Is it even outside the airport?

Yeah? It's about probably a ten kilometer radius around the airport.

Oh God, this is going to be your next obsession.

Like firste you're obsessed with trolleys and everyone was sending its trolley pis. Now we're gonna get street light picks flootered to our Facebook grow them. Send us a street light so Mitch gets a mad heart on food and we love the street light.

Don't send me an ugly street light. I only want look at.

Chowd looking deep.

Look at them.

They're tiny, gorgeous. Look at that one. I mean, they just look like streetlights.

And I wonder I've never noticed I could reach up and touch it. Maybe that's why they don't do it, because hoodlums just would jump on them and swing on ship.

Look that's the side of me. Oh, it's gorgeous.

See what I mean?

No, there, how tiny they are because they could hit them. The plain could hit them. When I tell you, I almost rearandered it uber the other day trying to get a look at these things.

Because you're weird.

Crispy greame so deep in my gullet was choked crying over the streetlights.

Oh my god, you were fucking so easily entertaining.

I've got a command astral on the implemmation, implemation implementation of these gorgeous little streetlights.

Next junk please, Okay.

Is it just me or do you not buy tissues?

What a waste of money. I don't buy fucking tissues.

I don't think that's a good point. I can't remember the last time I bought tissues.

Yeah, I just used toilet paper. Same.

Yeah, even if I'm sick, like when I had COVID and I was blowing my nose a lot, I just grabbed a roll the toilet paper put it.

On side table. That funny.

Probably looks wrong if people come in my room, they think that I'm using it as a cum rag.

But you don't need tissues. I is ues his shirt and T shirt and put it in the dirty clothes basket to a oh got T shirt? They're gonna get washed anyway. It's already cover in food. Well what if you want to wear it? Not again?

It's dirty. I really soil my shirts. I'm a heavy wearer. I hate And it's funny when you when you live with someone that is a tissue user, you notice them more because I have never been a tissue user.

Do they leave them around the house, nobody. He's got boxes everywhere. He's got a box next to his at home station.

Why I know.

He's got one in the living room, he's got one in the bedroom. And I don't use them. They're all him. Yeah, I don't even use paper towels. Oh no. I remember one of my friend's mothers.

I was saying in the US and my friend had to work, she had a shift, so I spent all day with her mother and she was just giving me like motherly advice.

I don't know why.

She just had to feel the silence. She's like you, and she was telling me, Oh, don't buy paper towels. That's just a waste of money. You just buy a couple of cheap tea towels and you just kind of rotate them as you kind of have them as your general wiping shit up towel.

You don't use them to wipe the dishes.

So I've got to there's the dishtowel to dry the dishes, and there's one for just general wiping shit up. Chuck them in the washing machine after and then you never have to buy payper towel.

And have my history with tea towels on them. They're good.

Yeah, that's why you just go to came out of something and get really cheap ones and then they when they die or they get too dirty, whatever, just get more ones. Oh, you know, in the same way that you'd buy paper towels.

All the fucking time. You just buy teatowels all the time. You win with your gay shit.

Maybe I'm not progressive.

You know that TikTok? No I owe that TikTok. When they're like, I was like, what are you talking about? My gay shit?

Those who get it get it. It's the same people who are like, use relyusable cotton pads for your serums and your tonas.

I can't do it. I do that too, and I love it. I can't have tried.

I can't do it. They're like a makeup remover and if I take if I take me face off, I just run it under cold water and then when it gets thirty, chuck it in with a load of whites. All right, yeah, but they work well. I don't do waste in my life, nor on this podcast. I don't waste time unlike dinner.

Yeah all right.

Next one, is it just me?

Or is selling quilt covers and pillowcases separately fucking criminal?

NH, that's another me one. What do you mean explain that it's so self explanatory?

Why the fuck do they sell quilt covers and the pillow cases separately? Just pop them in together as a set and you just buy the whole basard. It's like those really expensive homeware shops you go to. You're like, oh, that's a beautiful quilt, and then it says in fine print pillow cases sold separately, and I'm like, for fux sake, they're usually thirty bucks each the pillowcases.

It's a cash grab. But I also think it's because, like we have contrasting pillowcases to bed sheets because it's a nice little design thing.

Why are we you do that? Because pops? It makes it pop.

I just don't understand why you'd want to buy them separately, especially the ones that they sell with really obnoxious patterns, like one just the quilt cover and then not have it matched.

Yeah.

Yeah, but also you don't go buy a car and they not include the tires like they're kind of important.

Or like doors sold separately. You have to buy the doors for the car, you just buy the frame.

That bullshit. That's stupid, all right? One last yunk I believe yep?

Is it just me or a small town carnival? Shit?

Me?

That to me?

How very dare you know? How many small town carnivals have you been.

To a handful, a handful or Handful Town, Caiama Lawn, Woollongong.

Are we talking like fates?

No, I'm talking they all have the same rides, a shitty haunted house a er.

So are you talking like the show?

Like you know, they've got the Royal Lisa Show and then back at home they've got the Parks Show and the Forbes Show.

No, no, it's not shows that you know when you're in a beachside town, right for God's sake, and you Bateman's and you go to get ice cream one night and then all of a sudden there's a random fucking fairest wheel and children and cotton candy, and you go either branded or fuck I'm serious, because I either make it a show and called the Bateman's Bay January Press

It's just a pop up show.

Yeah, that's that's right. Yeah. Put put some fucking efforty in clowns literally.

For the international listeners.

A fair, yeah fair, Yeah, Yeah, Sometimes I do appreciate a small fair like a little a little fate, yes, like sometimes they take you by surprise. When I was in Wogga one weekend, they just had this fate there and I bought the show bag with all the squishes in it, like the dress ball character things.

I love a market. I love a bitch to be more of a market.

Let me google. I'm gonna google small town Canival. I'm gonna show exactly what I'm picturing. So you think too big? These are all too big? These are all too big.

It's just why don't you.

Google one of the ones that you've actually been to, Like, oh kaiam a fair thing?

Oh yeah, that works, Yeah yeah, let's.

Do oh kaiam a carnival.

What's the point?

Look, that's just that's got one lazy coaster in the middle of a park.

Oh my god, we are getting old, aren't we. Why Because at the side of show rides we go Nah, that's shocking. I used to think when my parents said, oh no, I'm too old to go and rides. I used to think, what do you mean that's always going to be fun. I'll never be that adult. And now I look at that and I go.

Yeah, I feel you. I got too much effort. I've gotta pay money for that.

I at the last Easter Show was because in Sydney now the Easter show's on, which for the international isn't it is a big Easter show?

Famously it's a show.

Should I start doing for the internationals?

But actually not describing it anyway.

We have Gatorade in Australia for the International Gatorade is gatorade?

Look? I like the Easter Show. And I also forget my point. Are you talking about how we're too old for rides now?

My memory, we're too over Ohm. There we walked through last year and there was a coerm at the frog hung on like a hook, like a fish hook, and oh, should we play to win? And I first thought was we're not gonna win. Yeah no, there's no way. There's no way you were going to win that. I'm sure practical. Now, that's a waste of money and time, not even fun. Oh god, I.

Never do those things because I was scarred once. I was traumatized by it. I was at the Parks Show, which to the record, great time, okay and judgment and yeah they commit. But I was at the Parks Show and I was walking around with my mum at the show, and I was kind of walking ahead of her, and out of nowhere, this Carney guy just hands me these darts and goes, come on, ever, go have it go.

Didn't win anything.

And then mamad kind of turned her back on me, and she turns around and goes, Mitchell, you didn't ask for my permission to play that.

Now I have to pay him.

And I'm like, I didn't mean that.

I didn't like he just kind.

Of courted me and goes, yeah, have I go, and it just, yeah, it was very confronting and traumatic, and so now I'm just scared of Carnie's and I never fucking win. I'm real good at that, but I wasn't that day too.

Poor thing. Yeah, they can stretch you out.

Yeah, so much trouble. It's a bitch you didn't witness it. You took your eyes off your son.

That's on you.

That's on you, ma'am. And while we're out, let's get a DNA test for your second Sam. All right, thanks Jenna for nothing.

Yeah, thanks for that Jenna. God love you Jenna.

While you're here. We actually have a room that someone says, if Jenna isn't a bitch, she'll just say so. So now's your chance to nip that one the butt.

All right, Well, so I thought that's a shame because she had Jenna wasn't a misogynist, you'd speak now, well, you can't argue with that.

Look if you voted no in the same sex marriage debate, say nothing right now. Wow, I'm shocked if.

You're somehow connected to the whole Ukraine situation.

Too much, too much.

I agree far out. Let's get out of here, Mitchell.

Yeah, time to go, Darling.

Yes, so now we are going to be away for a little bit. It's our east to break. Ladies and gents. Busy boys, busy boys.

I'm going to be back.

I'm in bog and go making mum do everything for me.

Like I said, I'm doing like a child on the Easter Breakfast show. So I'm getting up at three am. The crackadile on everybody.

Poo.

I know the pain. I know the pain, but probably.

See Yeah, the family. I'm going to see the family. We got Hayden's Filipino family who make amazing food, and then my family will just do classic Easter. I think we're doing a boat.

Are you doing that whole split thing where you do one side of the family for lunch and the other for dinner.

Well, that's the good thing about Easter is that there's multiple days. Like Jesus was like, yeah, I'm gonna milk this, so we get I think Friday with my family, in Sunday with his Are.

You going to be ordering fell out of fishes on Good Friday?

Oh?

Mum will yeah, mom, mum, old guilty.

Yeah. All right, guys, thank you for listening.

I give us a review five stars. It keeps us going.

We love your five star rating on Spotify Police, and we've finally got up to five stars overall. It was four point nine for a bit because some people dogged it, but we're five overall for now.

I will see you in a couple of weeks. Guys, stay say look after yourself. Thanks for darling. Yep, see you guys.

Is it just me a podcast by a couple of mitches.

Make sure you've follow on your podcast.

A welcome to add brief. This is our secret segment. On the end, we pretend that we're gone, and then we go nap kidding, and then we just fuck around a bit. This bit is not planned or structured or whatever.

We're back now.

Because I'm not an absolute idiot. I did buy myself an Easter President as part of this gas lighting general.

I'm smart move, because I was like, I'm going to want something.

Can I have one of these?

Yeah?

What do you mean? Can you have one? I gave it to you with the GIF. True, true, true, but you never know when the lines are blurred these days.

Oh, oh, oh my god. These are my favorite East of chocolate.

What is that?

It's the this is true, the chocolate with the marshmallow inside.

I don't think I've ever had one.

Yeah, no, I share, or let's find another one in the box.

They were literal. They look like actual turts. Oh my god, they're just Cadbury milk chocolate, but insides a little white marshmallow.

I did not know these existed and lookoks like an egg. Oh wow, they've committed. It's like got a yolk and everything in the marshmallow.

Oh that is heaven. That is my favorite chocolate.

Fuck me, what did the taste like? What did it taste like?

That is so distinct, like those marshmallow things that you get with the coconut on the outside.

Oh, snowballs. Snowballs, yeah they do.

Yeah, chocolate marshmallow. Yeah. Wow, that's so good, isn't that?

Is that not really good?

I don't think I could have more than two because it's very Yeah, and there were only two when I gave them both. What gave one to you, one to me? That's fine.

I would have eat them on the car right home. So I'm glad.

I've got a Karra milk, bunny. If you want some of that, but that's yours. You take it, You keep it, ma'am.

It's fine. I'm not gonna eat the whole thing. What do you I'll share it. Oh oh, oh, massacre the Carra milk. Just bash this bunny's head in.

Do you remember the good old days when Cadbury used to claim that Karen milk was a limited time thing and we got excited when it came back.

Yes, Now it doesn't seem going anywhere everywhere.

Do you think what's happened is they mass produced and they over they overproduced, and now they've got to just use the leftover chocolate in Easter stuff.

Oh like last year when at Christmas time they made Christmas boarbules, which were basically just left over Easter eggs, and they're like, oh fuck, we've got these tin round chocolates. What are we gonna do with them? We've got all this leftover ship. We'll call them barbules that you hang off a tree. They go Christmas baubles.

Oh that's really good. You're not I want to do on the fly. You haven't planned this top five Easter chocolates because I've got a very big opinion five of the best Australian.

You're doing your five okay, so start number five?

Right? Yeah?

Yeah, I absolutely adore the Turkish to light their box sets. They called box sets.

As in like you get the egg and a couple of Turkish delights.

Yeah and also but yeah, but you also get like an egg cup, like a plastic egg cup. They're in the box at Coals and Kmart even and they have like a little set. Yeah you can also like you get tweaked, you get flake, you get them all.

Oh yeah I know what you mean now Yeah, yeah, I love any Oreo Easter egg. Oh is that number four? Number four?

Okay?

Yeah, I know that they do slap too.

Do you like Oreos wull Stop? I like Oreos wull Stop.

Of course I like Oreos.

I'm not a fucking idiot man. Number three is the cherry Ripe box set. Nah nah nah nah nah.

Really, the cherry ripe Easter Egg is how I learned the hard way that cherry ripe is dark chocolate.

It's my favorite chocolate, or it was as a kid.

Cherry rub was always my favorite, but because the cherry bit was so overpowering, I never noticed that it was dark chocolate. And I fucking hate dark chocolate. So Mum got me the cherry ripe Easter egg and I was like, yeah, what's this wrap? But she's dark chocolate and she's like, yeah, it's cherry ripe. And it's because they barely put any cherry bits in the chocolate egg. It was this dark chocolate with a couple of bits of red crap. And I was like, how do I go this long not

Ea.

The easter egg version, well, the walls of a chocolate egg are so thin you can't get your cherry in it.

Speak for yourself. I can fit my cherry.

Well.

Number two is a cream egg. Now I'm not including the marshmallows. I'm talking eggs, guys. The marshmallow bunny is my favorite thing, but a cream egg. We're talking purely eggs here.

Okay, we were talking about this on trash Alley the other day. All Right, Hay's favorite. It's definitely creame eggs too. And I'll say the same thing I said there. Nah it's they're good, but they're again too sweet. You can have one and then you've got a fucking headache. allD a.

Like I've said, I've say it once, I'll say it again. There's a coming through between me and all right, Hey, I don't know what you mean by very rich one for the When is the kind of surprise egg?

Oh that's not Easter chocolate.

It is the kind of eggs. It's gigantic. It's all it is is a novelty sized, big East kind of surprise.

All right, Okay, I get it, because that makes sense. But people who get normal kind of surprises that are ever green, you can get them all year round. They're not fucking Easter eggs. They're kind of surprises when people get them.

For Easter.

I'm like, what are you doing? That's not East of Chocolate. There's no point of difference. It's just an egg you can get all year round.

No, it's mine, and it is so good. It's mine.

I design it's and the toy inside is it's like a dinosaur egg. It's so much fun. It's a huge toy. That's so smart because you know what Kinder could have done if they wanted to skimp out. Let's give them four little toys, you know. They made the big toy that.

Well, like some shitty bonbond things in.

There, yeah, or an easter bunny thing.

I don't know.

Anyway, they're my top five on the fly.

I don't think I could possibly think of five.

That's probably a good thing. That's probably a sign of a faty that I knows five.

The other day, the reason we're talking about this on trash Alley is because we tried the Bubbalo Bill Easter eggs and eye bloody adored it. It tasted beautiful, however, nothing like a bubblo bill really. Yeah, it just tasted like strawberry fretdos.

Well, here you go, I've got the coal section up. The Easter eggs.

Did you love strawberry Fridos, by the way, I feel like you can't get them normally. You can only get them in when people are raising money for the netball carnival.

Don't why I'm awing.

My mum's alive and well, but my mum's favorite chocolate ever is a strawberry Fredder.

They're fucking amazing.

But you know he can get them coltechs petrol stations because my dad when he used to get petrol aid and I would always come home with a chocolate freader for my mum's Oh that's beautiful shell bell and he'd throw it to her when he walk in the door.

Okay, that's less cute.

No, but like it's an affections she.

See.

No, she's on the couch, you know, dressing out on the iPad. You know it was romantic. Yeah right, I'm going to get the coal section up because I want to see what fucked chocolates they've designed this Stop eating while talking.

I mean, I know I said I wasn't going to do a top five, but I'll just say what I said last year.

Red Chulet will always be the best. It's the superior East of chocolate. Yeah, you can't go back.

Wmber tricked you last year. I blindfolded him and said, can you tell the difference? And you said, oh, that one tastes better, and I said that was red chult.

Oh like fuck, fuck this shit milk chocolate Easter?

It coins?

What the hell that?

I hate coins? When they put them in that little soil, the foil paper and the East bunny doesn't need cash, guys, because he doesn't need money because he's.

Now see what the fuck are lint doing. They've got their lint bunnies. They're nailing that but up the top right here. And koala bear, what a koal that's got to do with Easter? Oh?

What the fuck is this?

Hold on?

This is a Dell dino and it's a chocolate dinosaur in a dinosaur egg.

You can't just make shit chocolate and call it Easter like, You've got to have the bunny theme in there.

And look at that brand or Jesus Libbert, Jesus would be nice a chocolate Jesus. Look at that Mitchell or got fer Aero shaved done down here? It's a chocolate squirrel holding a nut for funck sake.

Now I'm mad.

Look at the price of red chilip Ma. It's four twenty five.

Oh yeah, no, oh my god, I can't wait to devour red fucking chilp.

Look at him? Look at him.

Oh sorry, it's not just the red chilut rabbit. It's the red chilip air Lican's rabbit. That's what they've called it on the on the cold website.

That rabbit has seen some shit.

It looks like dinner. The red Toolet rabbits look like dinner.

The internationalism has google red chilp.

Look at this rabbit.

Lin Easter in a carrot? Right, No, no, for reindeers, idiot?

Bluey chocolate?

What all right? Hang on?

How much is the bluey chock? But my nephew know, I would love that your peopling Mitchell got you? This wants me? Hey, thank you to your pibbling. Oh no, it's a sticker book my era.

If any of my nieces and fews declare that Mark is the favorite uncle, that's when I'll just rebrand is pibbling. Well, I'm your favorite pibling, so I'm winning. Yeah.

Anyway, that's my thoughts on the chocolates. Everyone, They're fucked. Go back to the base. Go back to the girl days. God, we've really shown our age yelling at carnival in kids that you're enjoying carnivals, street lights and now chocolate boxes.

Yeah, you've gone from appreciating show rides to appreciating architecture.

I'll look at those street lights. Aren't they adorable? They are adorable?

Google them, guys, Sidney Kingsford Smith. You have to go on Google Maps though you have come back. Someone what was general homes drive drop a pin you'll see for.

The internationalist says google Maps is Google Maps.

Do you like money bottle? I'm a YEI boy. Now for those listening, I'll love my yetti you trick out of a cold bottle to what's a YETI ye. It's one of those bottles that claim they keep ice cubes for forty eight hours.

Never heard of it. I saw it on TikTok so. I bought it was one hundred and ten dollars.

One hundred and ten dollars a lot of money for a water bottle.

That's ridiculous. Someone will blogged that around here. You reckon yeah knowing.

Yeah.

The track record the Bolts of Culture, They're like, oh, that looks free too, it's unattended.

Listen to how insulated it is.

I think I don't need a yetty drink bottle. I've got the Frank Greens. I'm all thought it.

Oh you're a frank Green boy. Now can I play you some sound effects that I got but I put on here in the height of our a ad game that were non violent, Like I thought, how funny would.

It be if it was a really innocent ads?

Yeah?

Yeah, Like, let me get an ad from kiss right, really innocent?

This is the Department of hell forthrized by the Australian Government camera.

Hey Australia, there's never been a better time to check up on your health.

Just can't live for During the middle of helpad, the shell calls express great as he road trip booklet is free, with page after page of ideas to keep the kids.

It was just a magpie.

You're getting swooped by a magpie in the middle of an ad swooped by a magpie. It is degrading.

Yeah, mate, I grew up on a farm, of course I did. True, you have to show a moove bos those magpies.

What about the re His new South Wales Rail Museum has step back.

In time and experience as steam train ride every day these school holidays.

Oh no, there's a goat on the tracks.

Oh no, oh.

Get it off, get it off, get it off. Oh no, it's still alive.

That's good. Oh it was worth it. That's awful.

Yeah, that sounded I didn't even plan that. That sounded like organs were being squashed.

It God, any other what other sound effects?

You got?

The innocent one?

Why do we use the fucked up ones before we could have done? And ida you'll find all your Easter goodies like julip hunting eggs. Great one seventy gram only four dollars fifty eight not.

Oh fuck yeah? Anything else?

Oh yeah, I've got plenty save on baby essentials in baby Bunting's huge car sales.

I couldn't hurt a baby, not a.

In the middle of an ad the voice over chick just vomit, oh the middle and.

A kiss wuz right flow.

There's a cruise ship fog one from a carnival cruise ship. It was so loud in the car, going Yeah, I wonder what's happening in Ukraine? No, do you remember the fucked ads? This is a second time I've mentioned it.

Today.

In Australia, we had a same sex ma Mariage plebsite which disgusting and degrading, which is when the public the Liberal government were too fucking spineless to just put same sex marriage into law.

So they were like, Ah, should we allow gay couples.

To marry in the same way that three couples can?

Oh, we don't want to make that decision, We'll let the public debate it yes for weeks upon weeks. Yeah, it was months and it was like headline news all over the TV and papers and stuff, and I was like, I really don't like my livelihood being discussed like that.

It was so bad and the ads were awful. Remember there was there. The no campaign had just as much legal right to campaign against it then the Yes campaign. So the yes campaigns were people and queer people and non binary people and artists and public figures going piblings, going on and marry, we love each other, lovers love?

Oh my god? What was that? Did you drop your guts though? You let Fluffy off the chain, didn't you?

A big cat just got to go at a small bird?

What is that?

It's the cheer in studio. It hasn't been oiled.

I actually made a mental note to bring some WD forty in here the other day because my handles kept squeaking.

Really did it work? But I didn't bring it, But I I shouldn't have to. Surely this place.

Has it gay marriage ad campaign?

Is there no w defaulty here? No, there's not.

This is the best. This is Bob Catter. I want to see Bob Catter. This isn't Yeah, we played it. This is an Australian MP local Member of Parliament talking about he was asked about the same sex marriage pub site. This is his response on National Life Television or.

Final observation on the same sex marriage debate from Bob Catter.

Final Queensland.

You know people are entitled to the sexual proclimities. I mean, let there be a thousand blossoms blooms, but I ain't spending any time warrant because in the meantime, every three months a person who is torn to pieces by crocodile And.

Okay, so were the ABF who were meant to be really credible. They're laughing at him, going what the fuck you are? So called?

It's just the switch.

Like I know, I can't deal with ten percent of the population's legal rights. I've got every three months someone being more by a crocodile to deal with. Fucking.

I sat next to him on the plane once and he's Yeah. When I was in Mount Isaa, the film for Survivor, they put me next to him. I think, I don't know why, Bob Catter, Bob Catta thinking of the right person that man. Yeah, because he's the member of Mount Isa who's going home, and Mount iSER is a mining suburb.

They are not voting.

Yes, I mean sorry, I don't want to put words in Mount Isa's Yeah.

Yeah, homerphodes Mount Eyser.

I don't want to speak ill of Isa. She's lovely.

But Mount oh, it's gorgeous.

And you know what, that Mount's probably been sucked by a woman. I reckon Mount Isa. If anyone's a lesbian, it's Mount iSER.

I mean, i'd Mount iSER good one. I'd mind Mount Iser' minor. Anyway.

Bob Cattle was next to me, and he's famous for wearing an a kubra big oussie wide brimmed hat.

And he checked it.

He put it in checking above the Why because it's his it's I guess it's his brand.

I suppose you can't just wear it on the plane, can you.

That'll be annoying.

You fell asleep too, and you write handwritten notes dinosaur to who parliamentent It was.

Just the.

Oh my god, you should have done a cock of balls on his face and he was asleep.

I recorded it.

I have photos.

I swear I haven't heard this story. That's ridiculous. Have you seen Pauline Hanson forgetting her birthday? No, please look that up.

Explain who Pauline Hanson is for the internationals.

For the internationals, Pauline Hanson is a dreadful, dreadful woman. She's got red hair. She's like putting lipstick on a pig. Really, that's what she looks like.

Yeah, she is a very famously right wing.

And she's always always Yeah, she's so problematic, So Raci's so fuck She's an idiot.

Anyway, this is her, apparently forgetting her own birthday.

Yes, that's so good, just because she's sixty seven and you're a retirement age which I am proud to say, I am sixty seven years of age and I turned sixty seven yesterdaytes later. Misrepresentation, Senator, what said I've circulated this on my birthday? My birthday was last month. This was not circulated on my birthday, so it's basically misrepresentation, telling a lie. He sorry, Senator Hansen, but the Senate did hear you say yesterday was your birthday?

So if there's some confusion, I think we sorry, said I'll give you the call sender the Hanson.

Sorry, so senator is.

So handsome yesterday, it's not my birthday, so you're wrong. I'm sure you've realized that my birthday and I said in it was my birthday was last month.

Senator Hanson, thank you for clarifying.

I'm now correct the record, and I would urge your office to pull up the record.

There is no points of order. Let's get back on track.

If you forgot her own birthday, the dumb rang of bits, She's still gasol at them, thinking she was they were wrong. She goes, so you're wrong. I'm sure you've realized that she's disgusting.

Anyway, You're not a political podcast, although we there's been a weird episode.

The start of the show.

We said to Jenna, we're going to gaslighter into thinking we're a political podcast, and at the very end we become one.

Yeah, wow, we should we should gaslight Jenna the next time we do it. We can brainstorm now because she's not here.

Just so everyone knows, Jenna has consented to being gasolate, Just.

So everyone knows that's not true.

She hasn't. No, no, no, not on the day fucking dinner. Is he still here? I don't know? Should I message it? Should we should?

We bring her back in here, and then as soon as she sits down and says one word, we just wrap the show up and go all right, bye, thanks for listening.

Yeah, let's do it.

Well. On that note, we hope this podcast made you feel at least two percent better today.

That's all. Yeah, just two percent, So we do, so we do. Thank you for listening.

Everyone, have a beautiful Lisa, hope you have a nice break.

I'm calling Jen on four six seven, So do you want to come back for the race? Do you want to come back for the rest? We've got ten to fifteen left? All right?

Yah?

What's going on in the background there?

I don't know.

Sounds like she's at a shitty carnival. What are we gonna say?

We literally just say bye as soon as she gets here. God, no time, like the President, Jenna.

Have a great break.

Yeah, we can still talk in the break, right, is a break from each other as well?

Yeah, that's that's the reason we're taking approach. I can't see on a sidet of you anymore. Ah, Jenna, Jenna, it's back. Come on, you've arrived just in time for a D D bre.

She's got a coffee and a slice of banana bread.

You don't you are not busy at all a wagon podcast and lied to us what we do to say for yourself?

Take a seat, Yeah, because I was waiting for.

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