Hey, the folks in this episode, Layla's got a boyfriend. Welcome to this episode of Amy and TJ Roads. It's called Secret Lies of Mormon Wives. But not all the wives are necessarily wives.
Well, look, things happen. Life happens. Yes, wives get divorced and then they move on and they get new boyfriends, or they marry, or they enjoy single life. But yeah, you get all of the above. It's a mixed bag, just like life is.
But Layla that we're talking about is Layla Taylor. Of course, one of the stars of the hit show. It's a hit show, but last year season one, it took a bunch of hits after the season aired, and all that was talked when it first got pitched to us, we had a couple of folks in the studio with us. They said, oh, yeah, the swinging scandal. That's all we heard about was the swinging scandal. Is it over yet?
I think the swinging scandal is over, but there are more scandals to be had, because look, I think it's interesting these this group of women were trying to modernize or at least show the world. We all have our our thoughts about what the Mormon Church is what it means, and they're like, hey, y'all got it all wrong. We're just like you in a lot of ways. We make mistakes.
Sometimes we drink, sometimes we curse, sometimes we sometimes we have sex with people who aren't our husband's I mean whatever. But I think that was the intent at least to kind of pull back the curtains. And you know a lot of people. Some people were offended, some people were shocked, and some people couldn't stop watching.
So I should say that the young ladies sitting in our studio right now was not caught up in that swinger skin.
She was not.
I should make sure we say that we we're talking about. Leayla Taylor was on the show. She was a part of the I keep messing. I want to say mon talk because of.
Where we're from, right, it sounds like mon mon talk like Montauk, New York. It's just north of or east of the Hampton's.
But it's mom hawk talk like as in TikTok. And that is where they absolutely made their mark. They absolutely blew up. They continue to have a huge, a massive following. But Layla Taylor was a part of that original group and a part of the season one hit, which is now coming back for another season. Miss Layla Taylor in the studio with us. Now Laila's got a boyfriend. Are we gonna meet this guy on the season?
You do?
We will? How How many how many shows in do we have to go to meet this guy?
What do you mean? Like?
How many episodes?
I think he's introduced on the second episode, so we only got into the first That's why we didn't know.
I have right, we don't know anything. You're not public yet with.
No, Well we're not together.
You not together anymore, so you have to watch the arc of your relationship play out in front of everyone.
Ya.
How do you How do you feel about that?
I think it's gonna be hard for sure, just because I feel like, looking back at a relationship too, I'm kind of like questioning a lot of things and questioning his general like intentions with being with me. But I think at the same time, like I'm able to share what it's like to date as a single mom and kind of like the dating culture in Utah. It's such a mess there, honestly, and it's very unique experience. So if I can kind of shed light on that and share that, I'm happy about it.
I have so many questions. Do so when we're watching the season, because we of course will be tuning in to all the other episodes. We just were able to see the first episode. But do you all end the season together like all of.
Us girls know you and your guy?
Yeah, we did, okay, So this is a surprise for folks who will be watching the season. Yes, it turns out after the cameras went away, so did your Relationshipah.
How long after the cameras went away?
It was like just right after whoa?
Because you talked about his intentions and that's something that was talked about in the very first episode. It's got to be a little tough for dating now because a lot of people are seeking you out to build it. Okay, so you're running out.
I feel like it's something that I'm very cautious about, and you know, people will put on the front and say like, oh, I don't care about that. I don't care about show, I don't care about any of that. I don't want to be a part of it. But it was convenient that every single time the cameras are up, that man loved the.
Camera loved it. Yeah.
Wow, Now now this honestly, is even more interesting to watch because you can see for yourself or judge for yourself when you see how the two of you interact when the cameras are on and now knowing what you're telling us, that's fascinating but also heartbreaking. Have you seen any of the episodes yet?
I'm gonna see it all when it drops, So it's gonna be definitely interesting to watch about all of us girls, Like we'll hear things like when we go to like pressling things like that, people are like, oh, like this here, and I'm like, oh, keep telling me more because like we haven't seen any think I'm like, just fill the whole whole season for me.
I have the episode up now if you want to.
I don't.
That's too bad, but that's a part of it was supposed to be a complete relationship conversation here, but that is that actually sucks. And for people who are listening now, oh, young women, young men who deal with like how do you know what do you see? You have a you had a unique situation and that you were a star of this huge, phenomenal, phenomenal show, so you could see why somebody would come and try to increase their followers
or something like that. Yeah, but for the rest, for normal folks who are dating, what did you see that everybody should be aware of that you look back and go, I come on, I knew this dude was not on the up and up.
Love bombing yea bombing.
The first start of our relationship, he came in extremely hot right away, Like I think he said I love you to me two weeks into seeing each other. We were official a month into seeing each other, so very just hot from the start, would overdo the guests, would overdo the words of affirmation and just saying things that
I was like, well, that's crazy to say. I think, like two months into seeing charge of he was like, yeah, one day when we get engaged, and like when we get married, and he would refer to like my kids as like, oh, like our family and things like that. So just very aggressive from the get go. And I feel like as a single mom though, like I crave
like a family. So like when I was hearing that, like it was it was what you want to hear, what I wanted to hear and I feel and he knew that, and he knew exactly how to kind of like get me in and get me good.
It's called manipulation. I know that. You know it's funny because, yes, TJ, I think maybe was it a year ago when we started talking about love bombing, you were like, what is love bombing? But the point being is it's disingenuous and it's manipulative, and really, when you think about it, it tends to be done by people who are trying to feel something, so they love bombing you so that you'll love them and then they'll fill love. So it's not
even really about them loving you. It's about them wanting you to give them feelings of affirmation and love. It's it's not at all love. It's the opposite of love. It's it's interesting narcissism.
Yeah, is he already We broke up less than two months ago and he's already in a new relationship.
Which is all you needed to know.
Very telling.
He's just one of those people I don't think can be alone, and he seeks a lot of his validation through others, and I understand that it's definitely a very mature or immature characteristic to have, and hopefully he can work through that and find like joy in his self. I feel like you don't need someone to validate you all the time, so that will hopefully come with age
for him. But and my friend had sent me a screenshot of like what he posted about his girlfriend on his story, and it's very similar to how he would speak about me, like the most resilient person I've ever met, the most amazing person I've ever met. And I was like, that's exactly what you're telling me two months ago.
So how did how did you how did you meet how did you meet him? And yeah, how did he come into your life?
Hinge?
Hinge?
Yeah, I've learned my lesson. I met my ex husband too, actually on Mormon dating app, and I just feel like they never work out for me. I'm going to stay far away from dating apps moving forward now because two for two now on failed relationship.
Oh don't you're in a safe space. We both have two divorces. So it turns out if you end up with your best friend that actually has been so far, I'd say so far it absolutely has been the most successful, most amazing relationship because it was built on friendship, not on love bombing or just immediate gratification, genuine connection. Correct, Yes, that breaks up.
We talked a lot about relationships podcast We have different podcasts and doing so It's just that I'm very disappointed to hear not just about the breakup because that sounds like a good thing, but that somebody came into your life and tried to do this right as soon and you're talking what was the reason he gave? Like at the end of the show you said it was pretty quick, like it was.
It was a very abrupt breakup too. It was very unexpected. We were actually planning on going to Disneyland with my kids the next day. We had a flights booked, I had everything set up, it was ready to go. I actually booked his flights and everything, so kind of funny. And came over that night after he got off of work and he's like you came and crying, bawling his eyes out. I was like, that's that's odd. Why is he like upset? And I was like, oh my gosh,
like are you okay? And he goes we're done and I was like, oh.
What, yeah, so you had no idea this was the.
Previous day like the same thing, like I love you so much, I can't wait to spend the rest of your life for me, and just comes to my house and it's like we're done. And I was just very caught off guard and just extremely confused because I really did not expect it. I've never been so caught off guard.
Yeah, I'm I'm assuming you asked to follow up?
Oh I did?
I was like, what, Like, did I do something? Did I say something like what's going on? Because at that moment, like I was pretty like very very into this man. You know, we were talking future things like yeah, I was probably abrupt and too soon, Like I genuinely did see a future with him. So it sucked for sure,
And I was like, did I do something? Like, I'm just so confused, And he just mentioned a couple of things that he didn't want moving forward, So he was like I didn't love the show, Like I don't know if I want this to be a part of my life. But like I said, the season never at that and he was never against the show when he was filming, when I would be like, hey, like they might want to film this, are you okay that? Oh?
Absolutely?
Like what time do you need me there? Very like enthusiastic and like wanting to be a part of this comerience. So I was like, okay, like, that's that's a little interesting that you don't like this now, but you never had an issue with it before. And then religions because we're a part of or he is. I'm not very active and I wasn't very active when I met him, and that was never an issue for him. And then right when we were like mid day, he was like, Okay,
I want to start being active again. I was like okay, yeah, Like if that's important to you, then that's important to me. I feel like that's an important thing to do when like you're in a relationship and you're trying to be serious to the person is kind of take on what they love and what makes them happy and kind of try to support them in that. So I was like, okay, Like I'll start to go to church with you on Sunday. I can't promise you how active I'll be, but I'll
try for you. And he would just do very kind of double standard things that he would We would go to church. In five minutes into getting home, he's trying to rip my clothes off and have sex with me. So it's just like things like that and that's not okay, and like the church, so it was just like the double standards there were hard. He didn't like Matt I was getting into modeling. He didn't like that I made a lot of money. I just think very insecure, unfortunately.
And I think that in the church, we're kind of taught that the men are at the forefront of the household and they're the bread winners and they kind of rule the household and kind of things like that, and I think that's what he had in his head for like his future. And I'm super hyper independent, I obviously it would be the breadwinner on a relationship and things like that. I think that that was really hard for him to like understand that.
He didn't have any of these conversations with you about any of this. He just dropped a bomb after he loved bombed you. Then he dropped the bomb of yeah, this isn't gonna work.
Yeah no.
And he did this to me a previous time in our relationship as well, And I think that's shown on season two that he abruptly broke up with me another
time too. Didn't really say much reasoning. He just says like, I don't feel like this is right, and then later gave me reconings and completely I think they actually showed this, but completely like ripping me apart, telling me everything that I'm doing wrong, and just kind of like picking me apart and looking back, I just wanted to be loved so badly, so in that moment, I was like, oh my gosh, I'll fix all of this, like I'm so, so so sorry. And then we ended up breaking up
like officially like a month after that. But I think he just there's this kind of toxicness with you. How that I was mentioning like the dating culture. I think everyone there seeks perfection to an unnecessarily a necessary level. I feel like everyone is so after that and they want their partner to be completely perfect and that's not attainable.
When you say people in Utah, are you talking about Mormons.
Yes, I think it's something that's like literally embedded into people's brains that perfection is something that you need to have and you need to seek that, and if you're not perfect, then like you're not as worthy.
I feel like, so I obviously have well, I have very limited knowledge of the Mormon church, but I did have a friend growing up who was and she explained it to me that the more successful you are, the more seemingly perfect you are. It's regarded as God shining a light on you. So by being perfect or being close to being perfect, and having the perfect family and having your kids all stay warm, and it's actually proof to the other members of the congregation that you are
loved by God. Yes, is that correct?
I don't think necessarily loved by God, but I think it's just you socially are more accepted. You're socially more like loved. I feel like it's just looks and how you present yourself as very very important in Utah, and people talk like no other and things get around quickly, and if you're not showing up to church like, people are noticing.
And there's a lot of judgment.
Yeah, a lot of judgment if you're gone missions.
Yeah, everyone is very very judgmental in the stay And it's super hard, especially if we're regarding the show. When the show first came out in the show title or release, the amount of hate that we got from people that claim to be very active members, which you're not supposed to judge, you know, if you look in scriptures, the
only person that was supposed to judgeus is God. So to have like the backlash from the members was very interesting, And now they've lightened up a lot since the show's come out, and they kind of see that, like, we're not misrepresenting, We're just showing people at different levels within the faith and that's beautiful, I think, and they've kind of like stepped back since then. But yeah, it's kind of funny that it's always the members that are the most active that are the most judgmental.
Have you ever seen the most judgmental folks I've ever met? Are the most religious folks the ones sitting in the front row?
Yeah?
Yeah, and that There's been that way my entire life.
And I used to always say, who did Jesus hang out with us? Yeah? Really like the degenerate. It's like us after the tax collectors, the prostitutes, the people who were considered outcast in society for whatever it was. That's us, I know exactly. I'm including us in all of that. Yes, but that is the truth, and that's something that I think is so often forgotten. You said you part of the reason he gave you for not wanting to be in a relationship with you anymore was that you had
stepped back from the church. Why have you was you stepping back from the church a part of being a member of mom talk and why did you do that?
No, I convert to the church when I was sixteen, so at a very very young age. And my reason, frickin birting, is that I kind of had like a messy life growing up, and my home life was kind of a wreck, and I didn't really have that family unit that like a lot of families in the church
present themselves with having. And I started kind of spending a lot of times with my friends at their families, and I would come over for scripture studies, and I just always admired how close their family seemed on the outside. And that's something that I just wanted so badly for myself. So I started taking missionary lessons, where they have missionaries come to your house and they teach you about like
the fundamental things behind the church. So honestly, like when I converted, I didn't know a lot.
You were sixteen.
I was sixteen. I was a baby.
I mean, you're still just twenty four, you know. I mean, I'm still is yes, I mean absolutely, But I think it's pretty cool that you can be open about all of that. I see someone who was looking for love and looking for belonging.
Yeah, exactly, and that's what I wanted really badly.
I just thought, my little six year old brain, like, if I'm a part of the church and they preach so much that family is like the center of everything, then like I could have that one day if I converted.
To the church.
And that's kind of whereing my mind went in that moment. And now that I'm older, I've kind of like done my own research on my own and kind of figured out some things that like I don't necessarily love about the church or things that I do love, like the community and the family aspect is amazing, but there's just some things that morally I don't align with and I can't be part of something that I don't completely like
align with. Yeah, so's it's hard for me. And I still have so much respect for it because at that point in my life, I was going through a lot of mental health issues and kind of at the peak of those things in my life. So I feel like it was a really big saving grace for me that I really really needed to get through that hard time
in my life. But now I'm just older and it's just not for me and yeah, just nothing but respect for the churches again helped me a lot, but just not something that I associate myself with.
Wait, I how here you know you're on the show called The Secret Laws of Mormon. Wow, you're no longer a Mormon.
Yeah, neither is Jesse. A couple of our cast members aren't active. Mikayla isn't, Miranda isn't. So yeah, it's like the Secret Life more and wise. But I think we're also we all have upbringings within the church, and I feel like that's what we share on the show is like we started out Mormon, or we might not be active anymore, but we have had some type of relation with the church. And then the wife part obviously, like all of us have been married at some point and
things like that. So yeah, I think it's honestly refreshing though, to show that side of it, that it's religion's not linear and it's okay to help like ups and downs and like who knows, like maybe one day would come back to the church. Probably won't, but I think it's cool to just show that, like you can have different levels, but as long as you're a good person, that's all that matters.
Even though Mormon is in the tile now. Yeah, it is. That just an ancillary part of the show is because people see that and they might immediately think this is a religious it's going to be. I watched the first episode that was very little, and watched last season as well. Yeah, no, where where does Mormonism now play in the show.
I think it's very minimal. Honestly, I feel like they had it a little bit in the first season. But a lot of the girls are honestly like on their own faith journeys right now, and I can't speak for them and where they're at, but I think all of us are kind of just yeah, on our own journeys, and I think that they they mention it sometimes here and there, but I feel like the show is generally not really about it. It's kind of just about like our lives and our dynamics.
Yeah. I feel like the opening scene of everyone in Mormon garb holding hands with the mountain, like, that's probably the most religious part of the whole show.
The opening, And then they go to a clip saying, yeah.
The oh my goodness, So you have two children. What are their ages?
My oldest is named Oliver in his three and then is his name. Maximis so little, so they're they don't know what's going on.
They're not this isn't affecting their lives. Nomy just goes to a significant way.
Yeah No, And me and my ex decided not to show them on the show honestly, like, I just feel like this is my experience and it's totally fine. Of one day they come to me and they're like, mom, like, I would love to be a part of this. I would obviously cautiously kind of like introduce them to this world. But I think right now, they're just so young they can't verbally consent to being a part of this, and
I would never want to exploit them. And anyway, I know some of the girls show their kids, and that's totally their call. They're their parents, not me, So if they feel comfortable doing it, that's totally fine. I just feel like this world's so scary and you never know what people are gonna say about your kids or look at them a certain way, things like that, so I just would rather just protect them from this world.
Is there a villain this season? Oh for sure, Okay, but it was clearly was it Whitney.
Whitney was Whitney.
Yes, okay, so this season Whitney still I know she's back.
No, actually not Whitney.
She's not, is it Miranda?
No?
No, Miranda. She kind of got thrown into something ye.
Yeah, and she backed out when because she was the one I guess. I mean, this is the part I've already seen where it's acknowledged she was in the swinging group and she left when she felt like she was out in and now she's back, which I actually thought was a pretty cool hook if you followed the show the first season. This is actually like a really nice through line to see it. Actually you get to see the person put a face with the name yep.
Okay, but then what are you right? Usually most of the groups have groups of women. She's the villainy this.
What you're the what I feel like season one, I was definitely a lot more quiet and reserved. I feel like I was honestly so scared that I was afraid to.
Like make the wrong move. And I was going through so much mentally too.
It was just freshly divorced and kind of navigating that world as a single mom, So I was definitely really quiet. I feel like season two, I've become a lot more vocal. I feel like I'm like, I feel like I'm a lot of like comedic relief for having like a funny or a hard moment. I feel like I'm always doing something that's like funny to kind of like break up
the tenseness that I feel like I'm pretty neutral. I will have my opinion for sure, but I feel like, for the most part, I love to hear both sides of it before I like jump to conclusions and jump down people's throats. But yeah, definitely a little bit more on my spicy side is coming out the season, which I'm excited for.
How different are the folks when the cameras go off, is what we're seeing? I mean, I know there's some yeah, a little element of performative when it comes to these shows, But are these the same folk? Because we were taken by Taylor when she was here, we liked her, Yeah, like, oh she got the same in it. She seemed the same. But how much are we seeing that.
A lot of the girls are pretty genuine. There's definitely some girls I won't name names, but they're here, Okay, I'll say I feel like Jen, She's will have conversations before we start filming that She's like, oh, yeah, I'm gonna bring it, and I'm like, oh lord, just bring herself.
Actually, you don't need to do the most.
So there's definitely some girls that definitely the second those things are up, they kind of over dramatize things, which I mean make good TV, right, But I think I don't try to operate that way. I try to operate as like, as authentically as I can. And if you think I'm boring, if you think I'm quiet, that's on you. But I'd rather do that than do the most.
Uh, that makes a lot of sense. How did you even get in? I know you were part of the mom talk. Did you did you ever think I shouldn't do this, I don't want to do this or were you all in from the beginning? And how did you navigate that with your recent ex husband because obviously when you share custody with someone you've just gotten divorced. Did he weigh in? I'm just curious how you made the decision to actually enter into this world and did you know what you were getting into?
So actually I was cast onto this show when I was still married to him. So they went to go cast more Girls after Taylor had her rest because they needed to potentially fill her spot, but then she ended up obviously coming back, and that's when they casted me Jesse and Jen and he was there with me for my initial interviews with them with our production company and yeah this so I was casted technically with him, So
he was okay with it at that moment. Now he's like always will say like shit to me about it and stuff like that, but I think it's just coming from jealousy probably, But navigating this world's definitely been interesting. I feel like it's so hard to share so many vulnerable aspects of your life and have the public see it and comment on it and share their opinions on
things that like are so personal for you. But I also love it because I've had so many women reach out to me for silly things like the orgasm thing, Like I didn't think that was going to get big. I honestly thought it was going to be something that was like passed over and not a big deal.
But I've had so many women reach out to me.
They were like, thank you for sharing this and normalizing this, Like I have an experienced one and then I can help them out and like share tips and things like that. So I feel like it's really nice to be able to connect with people that have similar experiences.
I think it's awesome, Yeah, that you were willing to do that, because anyone who was raised in a very religious background probably had the same experience but just doesn't or don't feel comfortable talking about it. I mean, it's by not talking about it. Women. Look, it's not a given. If you haven't been shown or you don't know how, how are you going to figure it out? You have to talk about it. So I think that's really cool that you did.
Yeah, No, I'm really happy I did for sure, especially just like you said, there's a lot of religious shame that comes around sex and general because you're taught to not have it until you get married, and then magically when you're marriage was to be.
Like suddenly you'll just have an orgasm. Because your husband, who also wasn't wasn't also raised to be happy, how would he know how to do it?
Exp you.
I mean, there's all these things that no one it's too taboo to talk about. We'll have violent video games and we'll all go watch, you know, people get their head, you know, chopped off in a movie. But we won't talk about sex, and we won't talk about orgasms or the female orgasm. For sure.
I'm uncomfortable, are you?
And before listeners who don't know, will you share a little bit of that story with us?
Yeah? So I was.
I think I was twenty three when we were filming that season, or twenty two. I don't know which one, but twenty two, just barely divorced and have had multiple sexual partners and never experienced an orgasm. And I felt a lot of shame around it anytime that, Like women would encourage me, like, hey, we'll try using the vibrator by yourself, Like I would feel grossed out by myself and I'm like, oh my gosh, I shouldn't be doing this, shouldn't be touching myself, Like this is so gross that
I'm doing this. And even and sex too, I always felt like I was there to like pleasure the man, and if I walked away not feeling any it's fine because like, well he got.
Off, that's all.
Honestly, that is what a lot of women are.
Raised to believe.
Yeah, absolutely, yeah, for sure, especially in religious groups.
Gets ask, really, is that a lesson? Are you sat down and taught that or that's just kind of naturally what occurs in conversation that you're right, well.
I mean yeah, I mean I was raised in a church where it was all about procreation. There was no talk about pleasure. There's no topic. And obviously we know men can get.
Because I feel like there's is like a visual yes like that they so you know that they're fine, but like ours isn't like visually.
For a lot, never discussed and it's never something that you even think that you should you deserve, but then it's a part of it, like it was never discussed, like this is.
A part of honestly, Like I didn't really even know what it. Like was like I know what, like you hear the word orgasm, but I'm like, oh, like what is that feeling? And like anytime like I would like think I was experiencing it, I was like, oh, like I didn't know what it was, so like this feels weird. I'd be like, Okay, get off me, because they didn't know what it was. Because they had no knowledge of it. I never had the birds in these talks with my parents.
It was just kind of like they are one of those parents that like, oh, if we don't talk about it, my kids won't participate in And I was like, oh, sexually active at fifteen, so that clearly did not work. But I just, yeah, I just feel like that's not like a standard conversation you have with your kids. And I want to change that stigma and have that with my babies because there's no way I can be like, oh, you're not allowed to have sex when mom got pregnant
at eighteen. So it's something that I want to definitely have with my children. But it's just not common, and I feel like that's why there's so many like misconceptions around it and why so many women don't experience it. It's just because it's not standard to talk about it.
That's the thing. I'm getting good because I've talked to you so much about your upbringing. Is it just something that's not talked about versus something that's taught this is what you do. So even here you talk about that sex is not a matter of pleasure, like you're raised that this is not a matter of something you're supposed to enjoy.
Yeah, Well, and then when you aren't enjoying it because you don't know what you're doing you think I internalized it myself and thought, well, I just don't like sex. It's just me and I just don't get it, and everybody else gets it and I just don't get it. But the truth is if you don't talk about it, and you aren't taught how to understand your own body
that way. And I just think it's amazing you're talking about it, because I've been very vocal about it with my daughters as well, because yeah, you have to talk about it. It's not something to be ashamed.
No, absolutely, it's natural and it's not just to make babies. It's too joy So it's a good thing to talk about.
I found. The funny thing is you don't know, like you might think you've had an orgasm, but you don't know you haven't had one until you actually have one. And everyone said that, oh my god.
I know. I was like, the first time I had.
One, I was like, this is what I've been missing my whole entire life. I was like, awesome, well now and then you can't look back.
Now.
I'm like, never again. Will I ever have an experience or I don't.
Actually, it's like it's a life changing experience, and I know that sounds funny. Probably the guys true, But I think a lot of women who are listening will totally relate. And if you don't relate, God bless. Yeah that's amazing. But if you do relate, you'll know exactly what we're talking about.
Yes, I have questions, but I don't think it's appropect. So are you open to dating? I mean, now that you're not in church all this help, not practicing Mormon, are you open to dating anybody? What religion? Do they have to even be religious?
No?
Absolutely not. I am open to anyone. If you're a good person, that's all I honestly care about. I don't give a crap what religion you're born into. I don't care if you're active. I couldn't care less about anything. I feel like, just yeah, if you're a good human being and we get a log bell and we have good connection, I feel like that's all that matters.
Are you there yet? I know this other breakup is very recent. Are you there yet? Have you started even on a single date?
I've been on dates, but it's honestly like it's just kind of like to get back out there. But honestly, like, I'm so busy right now. If I were to honestly try to plan a date anytime soon, it would probably be like a month out. So I'm so jam packed right now with my schedule with all this going on, that I don't have time. And honestly, I feel like for so long I've been in relationships back to back, like I got on my marriage, then I met this
guy and things like that. I just feel like I really want to take some time to myself to truly heal from my marriage, to heal from things that I've gone through my childhood and not trauma, and I feel like be the best version of myself for somebody else, because I feel like you can't truly show up for your partner if you're not healed, you're on your own.
So I mean, you were a way wiser than I was at twenty four. Yeah, I mean it's true that, like you look at this, people always want to point the finger in judge, especially when you put yourself out there on television, so people can really get into your life and have totally feelings and opinions about what you did or didn't do. But you you had two kids by the time you were twenty twenty four, twenty three, twenty three, and you got married at eighteen, nineteen, nineteen,
at nineteen. So my mom got married at eighteen, had me at nineteen, had my brother at twenty one. So look, this is this is a story for a lot of women. But I think it's interesting that putting yourself out there and going through all of this and making mistakes and that's how you learn. That's why you're as wise as you are right now. So I mean one hundred percent because you've learned the hard way. But isn't that kind of the only way we do learn?
Absolutely, I feel like you can only learn by going through trials. And I'm grateful for everything that I've gone through. Like if I didn't meet my ex husband, I want to have my amazing children. If I didn't convert to the church, I probably want to have moved to you tall, Like everything in your life, I feel like happens for a reason.
That's the cheesiest saying.
But I just feel like I'm meant to be where I am because of what I've gone through.
Is there any I don't want to say it's a danger because those shows are wildly successful. You all had something unique and where you were and Mormonism, and I look at it now and I say, oh, this is feels like Bravo. Mm hmm, this feels like Real Housewives.
This is there. Do you all look at that modeling it's been a successful one for a long time, or do you see some things I don't even know if you all discuss it, but you see some things about it, like you would like to stay a little different from that type of thing, or that's your lane now.
No.
I think honestly our show differs in ways that I feel like the Real Housewives, they're not really like friends outside the show, like when the cameras are up, they hang out with each other obviously when they're filming, But I think our show is different because we're all genuinely friends that hang out and even when the cameras go down, like we're still hanging out and we're coming to each other's houses and having dinners and going out to lunch
and things. And I feel like that's why our show kind of stands out, is that you can tell that it's genuine, authentic relationships rather than those other shows, which totally fine. You can just tell that they're castmates. And I feel like That's why women can relate to the show as well, is that we're showing ups and downs in relationships, and hopefully those relationships when they do go
through those they're able to reconcile and move forward. But I think it's just relatable to show like friendship drama and like that.
It's not linear friendship.
Has there been a friendship that ended?
Yeah?
And Whitney and Taylor were friends, were they not?
Yeah?
They were friends Whitneyans and me. I guess when they got into their fights.
Yeah.
There's definitely friendships that have gone through their ringer in this group for sure, and as we fil more and more, I feel like that's definitely going to continue to happen. It's just so hard when you get nine women in a room together, there's bound to be a friendship that goes away.
That happens in life. I mean, that happens in real life without cameras. That is just a part of life. Yeah, women, yeah problem Yeah.
Yeah.
My junior year in college I lived there were six women in one apartment. Oh lord no, I moved in with my brother my senior year, I want to I was like, I would like some male energy around me, right, now, I love women, but sometimes it can be a lot and that is that is tough, and especially when there are people who understand that drama cells and that bringing it actually gets attention on you and can potentially help your career. You mentioned that your childhood, your words, that
it was messy. I guess is how you put it? Has your family weighed in? Do you are you in communication with them? How did they feel about you even becoming a Mormon in the first place.
So when I converted to the church, I actually hid it from my dad. So my mom's or my mom is white and my dad's black, and my mom supported me getting baptized. She was actually a member at some point in her life and then she met my dad. He ancouraged her to leave for some reasons, and then she got her records removed. So she's the one that signed off on me getting baptized, because when you're under your age, you have to have one parent.
Consent to it.
And I actually kept it from my dad for two years when I was in high school, just because I knew he wasn't going to be very supportive of it. Obviously, he encouraged my mom to leave. I knew who's going to do the same for me. So I would sneak out of the house on Sundays. I would like stuff of sundake.
Out to go to church. I was sneaking out to do a lot of different things.
I would shove like a dress into my bathpack, and I was like, by Dad, I'm going to my friend's house to go like study, go to church for a couple hours home.
Yeah wow, yeah wow.
So that's kind of like my upbringing with thought, which is it's interesting. It's definitely kind of funny what came back that I was doing that. But and to be fair, you don't look like most Mormons.
Yeah, most Mormons. I mean when I think of a Mormon, I think of a blonde hair, blue eyed person that is the stereotypical She's black. You're black, y. How has that been navigating that? I mean, do you see anybody.
Who looks like you?
Not a lot.
Honestly, It's definitely like I walk into the room and there's fifty people and I am the only person of color. It's definitely something that I'm very used to though because where I grew up in the suburbs of like Arizona. That's also very common is there's not a lot of people of color, so it's something that I've just kind of grown immune to. But I feel like in that situation, you can either like look at it in a negative way and you can be like, oh, like, I'm the
only person this room. This is really frustrating, or you can be like, yeah, I'm the only person of color in this room. You can kind of use it to your benefit. And I feel like that's how I try to look at it, because I feel like there's so many situations in life where you can kind of play the victim in those ways or you can just use it to your benefit. So I feel like in those situations, I'm like, yeah, like I stand out.
Like I stand out. That's kind of fun.
So, yeah, has the Mormon Church? Have they left you all alone? If you all aren't necessarily practicing yeah in the church? Are you still getting something from the church that has any problem with or is pushing back against the show?
No, they've kind of gone silent now after the first season came out. I think initially when like the show title was released and the trailers released and they're like, why are you in front of our temple?
And things like that, which was kind of funny.
Oh you're not allowed back.
Yeah, you know, there's like don't come on our grounds.
No, they didn't say that, but I think they I think the church really sustainment that they're like something I don't know the exact quote, but they're like gross misrepresentations on the media are like not true or something like that, and I think that they were. They didn't say quote unquote like secret lives, but it was right around the time that we released the trailer, so I think they were referring to us. But I think now they've kind
of calmed down, and I don't hear a lot. I hear sometimes some chatter from some members that they were like they don't represent us, but I'm like, we do, actually, because we're the ones that are brave enough to say what we're doing behind closed doors. And there's a lot of members that I know that are participating in the things that we're doing, they're just not brave enough to like say it. So, yes, we're not following everything quote
unquote that you should be. And there's girls that swing, and there's girls like me that drink, and there's girls that have sex before marriage. I think like four out of our cast members all got pregnant out of wet blocks. So I feel like it's normal to show or and it's not normal. It's not normal to show these things. But I feel like normalizing that you're human and you mess up is good and I feel like that's a good representation.
I hear that, right. It's everybody that does it. You all are just willing to show.
Yeah, we're just brave enough to like take the backlash that can come from being open.
Leila, I want to there's so much fascination with the Mormon Church because there is so much there's so much that we don't know, things that go on in the church that we don't ever get to see, Like I can't go to a Mormon wedding, No, I can't go. There are some things that you just don't get to be a part of. So therefore people are fascinated. What do people have right about the Mormon Church? And what do people have wrong about the Mormon Church.
I think people think that it's like a cult, So that's wrong.
But if you leave, can you still have relationships with your family? Like is it that strict? Because I think people sometimes think it's like scientology. It's confusing. People don't know.
Yeah, no, no, that doesn't happen at all. You get baptized of the church and you have like records in the church like that, but if you want it to leave at one point in your life, if you could, like they'll come and like check on you, but not in like a come back to church, like you need to come over.
They're like that still sounds a little culty. They come back to.
Check on you like a knock on your door and they're like, hey, like we haven't seen you.
No, you're good, You're fine.
I'm sorry. Was that a little aggressive?
No? I mean.
Knock?
Why have you been in church?
I what you're saying.
No, But it's not like a way like that, like why haven't you been here? It's more of like, hey, we haven't seen you in a while. We just want to make sure that you're doing okay. Like around the time of my divorce, that's when I stopped coming and one of the like sisters in the church came and knocked my door and brought us cookies and she goes, hey, I haven't seen you while.
Are you okay?
So it's not like a where have you've been like we haven't seen you like coming, like you need to make sure you come back. It's more of like hey, like as human beings, we're just making sure that like
you're good, like do you need anything? And I feel like that's one of the things that brought me into the church initially, is that the community is very strong and it makes you feel less isolated and alone because again, in that time in my life, that's what I really wanted badly is to not feel alone.
So all right, so that's what we get wrong, and it's not culty that it actually is more community. Yeah what do we have right?
Right?
H Utah? And and I a lot of white people.
They're all blonde hair of the Yeah, yeah, they tend to be well like some like very judgmental. As you mentioned, that is true, like anybody else can can anybody? How long does it take to become a member? So if I say today tomorrow I wake up and I really want to be a part of the Mormon Church, what would that process be like?
So you would talk to missionaries and they would come to you and they would teach you lessons. I can't remember the exact number. I think was like six or seven or something like that, and they come to your house to teach you again like the fundamental things, like the very basics, and then at the end of it, you have your agency to choose to get baptized or not, and then that's what you do at that point.
And then I chose to get baptized, and then.
You have your members or you happier records, especially like in the church when you do that.
I only say this because I know the friend that I mentioned in high school, but she was dating somebody who wasn't Mormon, and they were friends with my family, and they were concerned because then the Mormon folks were sending people out to his house trying to convert him because they were concerned that she was going to marry him. And her parents were like, if you don't marry another Mormon, you can't be a part of our family. So they
were trying to convert him. So that's why I was asking about that, because if that goes on, that is why people maybe get a little get the CULTI.
Vibes, yeah, no, and I get that. I think a lot of members do want to be with other members. I think it's just like maybe a familiar thing and being with somebody that's like likewise of faith with you.
Is probably better.
I see people in mixed faith relationships though, and I feel like that works fine. But I yeah, I think it's definitely like it's all they know so they feel comfortable with it.
Last thing here, folks who were fans of season one, who loved the show couldn't wait for it to come back for season two, tell us what is it you are dying for them to see in season two? Like, just hold on with fans of the show. You got to check out season two because.
I think you're right out of the gate.
There's a Halloween party that's at Jesse's house and it's insane. I don't even know how much got so much content out of one night that was five hours, but holy it was a crazy night.
And I'm really excited to watch that back.
So it starts off with a bang episode one. Season two, we have already gotten that far and we can't wait to see more, so much more. Thank you so much for coming in, and we always love having folks in person, but it was so lovely to get to meet you, and we're so impressed with your maturity and your wisdom. Much and all that you've gone through and experience and sharing it with folks because you're normalizing things. You really are.
So thank you for what you've done, and we appreciated having you here.
Thank you for having me and the show. Their season two starts May fifteenth. We can catch you where on Hulu. Not a certain time, it just drops May fifteenth. Binge.
We can binge the suck guess Oh man, I know what we're doing this weekend.
I don't know plans.
The stuff the playoffs are on.
Your sounds like a playing problem. That sounds like a you problem.
Folks, appreciate you listeners always. We'll talk to you against it. H m kay