Breaking News: Divorce is Trending

Hey, the folks, welcome to I Do Part two. If you got love right the first time around, this ain't the show for you. On TJ Holmes alongside my friend, my partner, my podcast co host Amy Roboch. That was also impersonal.

Let me, I'm very clinical.

It did with my person, my partner, my spouse, my what's the right.

Way to love of my life?

Love my life? There it is that you had to feed me that line is a little disturbed.

I think you probably avoided saying it because it's overused all the time on all the reality shows we watch, and you roll your eyes when people call each other the love of their lives. Then we look up and two months later they're so I think you probably tried not to use that.

Yeah. And so we have had a chance to come hop onto I Do Part two in a little bit, and there's always relationship news. So we're going to discuss some relationship news, some very high profile relationship news, and we're going to get into a couple of questions, one of them having to be what do you do post divorce? Is it important for you to rebrand yourself? We're also going to get into this question, is it good to throw a divorce party, a divorce celebration, or is that

And the reason why that's significant. It varies from state to state, but anyone who's been divorce knows sometimes folks will be strategic and plan their divorces for when they might have the most to gain and maybe the.

Least to lose.

You could look at it two different ways, and who knows that this is the case. But a lot of people are wondering if Deret waited for those ten years, because in the state of California, that means you've been in a what is it called a long.

Term marriage New Jersey? I know has that here?

Again different from state to state, but once you get branded as a long term marriage, you are entitled to fifty percent.

And so who.

Knows what the state of their finances actually is and whether or not that's even true. But a lot of people are saying, hmmm, I wonder if she was waiting specifically so that she could get fifty percent.

I'm sure it just happened to work out that way.

Surely she might even be like, hell, yeah, I did you know?

Who knows?

I've heard I've heard women say yeah, I stuck with it because I knew that I was. I had done enough where I felt like this was the way that made the most sense for me. So who knows what it is? But another thing people are talking about is that PK I think he got photographed one day before the divorce filing kissing and holding hands with a former Amazing Race contestant. So if you're a big reality show person, you might know who is it, Shannel wall Is. So

What we're saying is, we're not holding out hope for a reconciliation.

I don't think that's what happened.

They do have two kids, Jaggers eleven, Phoenix is nine, and so PK has filed for joint custody.

We'll see.

We hope the best for them. Divorce is hard, and it's really hard in the public eye. So we wish them both the best.

See when we say we wish them the best, oftentimes that doesn't necessarily mean that the relationship continues. Sometimes what's best, and we've learned that what's best is for them to go their separate ways. Now, another divorce that's taking place now is from a guy. Look, I love Steve Guttenberg back in the day.

Oh yeah, Three Men and a baby.

But before that police Academy. Wasn't he in the one with the what was the robot? What was the name of it? Short Circuit? Is it short Short Circuit? You remember that movie? Yes?

And I have actually seen Steve Gutenberg running in Central Park before he was running alone. He was actually I've only seen him one time running in New York, but I was like, oh my god, that was Steve. Good.

You're probably going to see him unning alone again if you see him because he is announced now he is also file from divorce of his wife of six years now six years of a shorter time. This is his second marriage. Been there, done that call with Steve if you want to talk, but his wife, Emily Smith, there is a significant age gap.

Did we look?

Is Steve sixty six six and we believe Emily Smith is thirty.

Five, so somewhere around thirty years, you know, does that fla into it?

I mean, it absolutely could have.

They're saying irreconcilable differences again, and he's already he's already agreed to pay sposal support to Smith. So they did have a prenup, which I think will help expedite this and hopefully make it a little bit less messy. Is certainly in the public eye. It's never fun to have people wanting to know.

All the details.

So if you had a pre up, hopefully that will make things a much smoother process for both of them.

And again, we don't we hate to speculate about somebody a specific relationship, have no idea what happened and why with these two, But anytime we've talked about this, certainly recently with with several couples of relationships where there's a big age difference, it does come into play. You could love somebody all day long, but you have different interests, you have different bedtimes, even you have different things you wanted.

Different activity levels, all of that.

And that can come into play in a relationship. So hopefully both of those get through that and look, like we said, Robes, we've been there, we have done that, and we know you can come out better on the other.

Yeah.

So those were yes, one hundred percent. Those are some recent splitting up headlines, but there are some moving on headlines from people who have just recently announced their divorces, among them Jessica Simpson. She it was right at the beginning of the year, correct that she announced that she and her well now ex husband Eric Johnson were splitting, and they had been together for a very long time.

But I love this part of the story.

So if anyone remembers Jessica Simpson's kind of been known as despite the fact that she is a ridiculously successful business woman.

Oh yeah, is a billionaire. I think she's a billionaire.

So I actually stopped myself, but I was like, I'm pretty sure she's in that billionaire league where you know, she's got the clothing line and everything. She's really expanded her empire from beyond music, even though she is making new music. But she was kind of known as, unfortunately for her, a dumb blonde, all because of that reality show she did with Nick Lache. Remember when she asked if Tuna was Chicken of the sea?

She was like, is it chicken?

And just because of that one perhaps maybe even silly comment she made, I don't think she's been able to shake, or maybe she at least feels like she hasn't been able to shake that dumb blonde, you know, the thing that people assigned to someone, especially if you just make one mistake. So anyway, I love this. She is now

I think that's great. I would hate for her motivation to be to prove something to anybody other than herself. If she wants to do that, that's fine. I know it can look good, and I know there's a pr element to everything when it comes to folks who are in the public eye. But I hope she does this for her. Who gives a damn when anybody thinks about you. If this is what she wants to do.

I hope she does it, and I think it is a cool thing. I think, you know, especially if so much of your life has been wrapped up in another person, or at least in that relationship, when you are now on your own, to start really investing in yourself, whether it's to go back to school. She's actually getting on the stage for the first time in fifteen years with this new music she has, so she's now investing in herself, and I think that's actually a part of the healing process.

This next headline I didn't even want to do because it has to do with j lovel and Ben. And unless the headline is they're getting back together, I don't really give a damn.

I know, we know how you feel and where you stand.

On still rooting for these two.

You still hope, you know, it's even as we're seeing them start to talk about their marriage, you're waiting for them to say, you know, because you see his kids hanging out with her kids and members of their family hanging out together, and you could see a real relationship, in an authentic bond that formed, and even between them, it seems like they're good. So you kind of want to know that, oh, they could get back together, but that's not the headline.

They can clearly get along as we see, these two have been each other's lives publicly for decades now. But yeh, She's was just quoted recently talking about how she told her kids. Look, these families have been intertwined for quite some time, and she said she told her kids she just promised them that Mama was gonna be okay. She said, I promise that I'll come out the other side stronger and better. I promised them that, and I did it. This is her saying that she has like come out

And it was a fairy tale kind of blood story because they had been engaged twenty years prior and then it just wasn't the right time. So now, for all of us who believe in love and are rooting for love. You think, oh wow, it just wasn't the right time, but now it is. Now they could be together.

Hope, And still the moment's just not right.

But she does say she has a great sense of peace in her life, and isn't that what we all are hoping for? Well?

Does some piece come for some people? If you have to a split or a divorce, do you feel better to get rid of stuff that you had together? Anytime? If you get divorced and you all lived in this house together, would you be okay with one person gets the house? Would you be okay getting the house? Or do you want you don't want anything to do with anything that you all had together?

To each his own.

But I like to start a new because for me, things have memory, things have feelings. I think what you surround yourself actually truly impacts how you feel. It affects energy, and it does for me. So you know, you make those decisions on a case by case basis. Unfortunately, you and I have had some experience in this department.

What do you think?

You know me fairly well, and I can separate. I can associate pretty easily and quickly. And something is dead to me and it's over to that point. I don't. You don't want to see something that has a memory attached to it. It could be a pleasant one or an unpleasant one. You just don't. I don't want to see that stuff, none of it. I don't want to drink the same drink.

No, seriously, I don't want to wear the same clothes.

I actually feel that way.

Think Okay, I'm with you there one hundred percent. And I mentioned that because Jessica Alba they are selling their La home for nineteen million dollars. It's on the market, so it's available if you'd like to go out and put your bid in. But it's in La. But this is the home she shared with Cash Warren, who she also I think it was the beginning of the year, announced they would be getting a divorce as well. But this is a home that she called their dream home

Her mouth, but yes, but what I think where you're going with this?

Look, she was married, They were married for sixteen years, and she and they both both Jessica and Cash, referred to this home as our dream home where they wanted.

To watch their kids grow up. I get that.

So when that dream is gone, when that dream doesn't exist anymore, it's almost like a rub to be in this place that you thought was going to be one thing and now it's another. And I just think that that is just that's a heavy It's almost like an albatross swaying you down and keeping you in the past. It kind of keeps one foot in your past. Now.

But they are moving.

On and eye has gone, so the house should go to For.

Me, that absolutely is a non starter.

Did you know that you have had a widow?

You know what?

I would have put an s on that or like, I just knew that he had a lot of women and probably some are still alive and some might have died.

Like I don't know.

He was married to one.

That's it. He only had one.

Why he's not a polygamist. I mean, yes, he was only Okay you're talking about Oh yeah, it made clay boy house.

And I'm thinking of all the women around.

He wasn't married to all of them at the same time, of course not. But I did not know this. But he died in twenty seventeen, and his wife, Crystal Hefner, is now engaged after a year of dating. Good for her. Crystal is what now thirty nine?

Yes, thirty nine, thirty nine years age gap and he was nine. He died at ninety one in twenty seventeen.

Hey, when you know, you know? But what I am saying here is that doesn't matter. A year doesn't matter. What are the rules of Uh, he's been dead for several years. He only dated somebody for a year and then God and gen. I don't see any issue here.

The question that people are asked is do you think an engagement after one year of dating is too soon? What if you're a widow. I don't think that should matter at all. I think you can still honor, especially if you you know the person who passed was somebody who was the love of your life or someone you had a beautiful relationship with, I think you can still honor them. I don't think anyone who truly loves no other person would want the person they're leaving behind to

It's sad. I want you to be alone and missing me every day the rest of your life. I don't want you happy going out to movie horror movies with some duty and popcorn.

I think I could never do that, though I couldn't watch horror movies again.

Really. Oh so, y'all go see a rom com together?

Okay, I don't know how we got there or went there, but no, I want none of that.

But there's no issue there, I mean, I.

Think so an engagement, people get engaged within momsw long.

When you're loon before you got engaged, Well was a long one.

First one, first one was I mean I was so young, but it was a year.

It was a year, no, no, no, no, before they dated a year then got engaged, So you dated for how long? Engaged?

I dated a year and then got engaged for a year, so for two years. Second time, this is a little.

This is a little you know, you talked about this before.

It's fine.

I got engaged after let me see, wait, hold on, get four months. I got engaged after four months, and I got married after ten months of meeting him.

Wow, you really thought I was dragging my feet.

Then, Jesus, what's what are your timelines?

Longer much? Two years? I think? And uh, you know what year? Probably a year on the first one. Okay, it was.

A year on the first one for me, and even shorter the second.

The first one and the second one, Oh my god.

Okay, that's the third one going to be Oh I ki tak tic talk.

I'm kidding.

Okay, next up here, we've known some people personally who have done this, but they have a divorce is it called divorce party or a divorce a divorce party? Okay, yes, but these things they feel im poor taste to me. We're talking about HGTV star Christina Hack celebrated her divorce being finalized with a party of sorts. You go out with your friends. It's one thing like look this, Christina Hack just did this kind of a smaller thing. Couple

So look again, I'm gonna stand here saying I'm not going to judge what anyone else chooses to do. However, if it were for me, I don't think it's a bad thing. I think when people come up and say I'm so sorry you're getting divorced, a lot of times I would say, no, actually, it's a relief, so you

I guess it is the best way to put it what it is. But to each his own.

I mean, you know what, like I don't know what someone went through. You know what did she go through to get to a place where she finally was able to get divorced? Or say I want a divorce? So maybe she needs to let off some steam and to celebrate.

You know What's that? We use this quote in our morning run. I think recently, if you can't be happy with what you have, at least be happy with what you escaped.

Yes, exactly, and that could exactly be I think it is for a lot of people. Sometimes breakups, divorce are exactly that.

All right. The final thing here is this quote, the pressure to be married to men is a conspiracy. Now that quote comes from an actress. Now when you hear that initially without context, or do you get curious or do you react? How do you take that?

I get curious? I would I would like to ask a few follow ups.

That's fair. But we talked about Anna Camp, who was of Pitch Perfect, and.

She's on this new season of You, which I've yet stream, but I've watched all the other seasons. So I'm actually excited. I didn't realize she was on this new season of You. But she's been married twice before.

Okay, so it's not just us. I always feel like nobody else and now everybody's.

Got to go.

It's a thing.

Right. So she had two marriages, two men, that both ended in divorce, and now she has posted on Instagram, I guess making it official just recently that she is with a woman.

Okay, fine, but that shock people, surprise people. But she used that line that the pressure to be married to men is a conspiracy.

I don't understand that. I don't.

It sounds like you're saying women don't have the freedom to explore, to be themselves. They don't have the freedom to go back and forth. They don't like there's pressure to possibly always identify as this, or label yourself or put yourself in this group or that group. I took it as that. Now, who is part of the conspiracy? I don't know, but I took it as that. Well.

I do think, you know, maybe even ten years ago, fifteen, twenty years ago, that might be more of something that I could get behind.

But I do think now, especially.

Having young girls now, who are nineteen and twenty two. I mean, I just think it's so accepted to explore. And I mean, maybe it's where you live in the country, maybe it's your family. But I do think now, more than ever before, I think people are celebrating and even leaning into the options that they feel like they have, that there aren't societal norms to the extent that you can't be with who you want to be with and

I've never been in that situation, so I don't.

Know been in which one where I felt like I was being pressured to be with men. I just well, you didn't just to be pressure I just like I just like men.

So it just kept it easy, I guess, you know.

I mean, I don't know, do you feel like there's a conspiracy against you or that you have to be with women?

Oh, I don't know how you're going to finish that. But yes, there's a conspiracy. But no, I look, I love this And we've been talking so much about relationships. We're gonna be talking about relationships more coming up in the next, the next weeks and months. Yes, if folks haven't heard, we'll get into that later. But it's like

Yeah.

That look, folks, if that tells you anything, you think you're the only one going through it, you're not. And I know your neighbor they look so perfect over there, they're not. Everybody's going through something. So I've loved doing I do Part two because it is a part of a community, and everybody can be a part of a community. So just people always keep that in mind.

Yeah, I think that's so important.

And when you see celebrities and I think there's one of those magazines that has a page that says they're just like us, but truly they are. I mean, you know everyone they show relationships, well, they'll show them like being in line at Walmart buying you know dog food. But you know, I think sometimes people think that if you've got money, or you have fame, or you have some sort of success in your life, that's somehow you're

They're just like us. They're just like that, I need this. Then they should be in the corner curled up crying, because that would be just like me. That's more so how I am usually, folks. Look, we always, always, always appreciate you all being a part of the conversation engaging with us, because we absolutely love doing this thing. A lot of news out there, folks are splitting up, finding love, they're healing, they're throwing divorced parties, they're going back to college.

Yeah, So if you're going through a divorce, if you're feeling lost, if you need some help from us or from our team of amazing mentors, you know where to find us. You can email us, you can call us. We are here to help, and all the info is in the show notes. So you can follow us on our social media's and please make sure to rate and review this podcast. We love hearing back from and hearing your feedback. I Do Part Two is an iHeartRadio podcast where you know the drill. Now only in love is