The entire way I think about sex has changed, and it's not even like I'm fully covered or anything. Just having just like a little bit more skin to work with really has made a huge difference in everything I do sexually. And not even just in terms of my own pleasure, like my own enjoyment, but also like my partner as well, because I feel like I'm more like, cognizant and aware of my body, but also their body as well. I feel like everyone should be allowed to have that experience.
The Intact Again podcast is an oral history project where we share stories for men who have been circumcised and are working to restore what has been taken from us. Our hope is to inspire each other with our collective stories of loss and recovery. Hello and welcome to the Intact again podcast. Our next guest goes by the name Mister T. Not that one. He is a 26 year old man that has been restoring for six months. He has gone from a CI two to a
CI three in that short amount of time. Man, I wish my progress was that fast. He has a biracial background, being both vietnamese and caucasian. He is also on the autistic spectrum and is bisexual, but prefers to be referred to as queer.
He talks about how all of these have affected his restoring journey and specifically talks about how coming from both a cutting and non cutting culture has affected his views on circumcision and how being on the autistic spectrum has influenced his restoring journey, his main motivation for restoring his bodily autonomy and regaining that control over his body that was taken from him. And without any further ado, let's get to mister t's restoring journey, or as we like to call it, restory.
I think I started, oh, man. I don't think it was January. I think it was probably somewhere like March or May. So you've been doing it for half a year, would you say? Yeah, like maybe five, six months. What CI level did you start at and what CI level are you at now, would you say? Probably, like, CI two is where I started. Like, I didn't have a whole lot of skin to work with. I was able to get the device on, surprisingly, without like a lot of extra
hanging over. But I was. I was able to, like, start with the device because I think my skin is pretty stretchy because I've definitely noticed it'll stretch a lot. And then, like, if I take a break for a week, all the gains I had receded and I was back at all. Not, not back to where I started. There's like, very clearly progress, but it definitely seemed like there was less skin. You know what I mean? I've heard from others that it's about a 10% loss that you get from that, which is not great,
but at least it's only 10%. I don't know. The only reason I had to take a break was because I was going on a vacation, I'm pretty sure, and I didn't want to have to, like, explain what I was doing around, you know, my. My partner's family. You know, we're all, like, on a vacation at the. At a lake or whatever, and we're sharing a cabin, and I just feel like it would get awkward not having very much privacy, that kind of thing. So it's a marathon, not a sprint.
So little breaks are okay. I'm a fairly consistent person, right. And so, like, once I have something established as part of my routine, I just do it. For me, it's just another thing I do. I wake up, I brush my teeth in the morning, I put on a device, or, like, I get home from work, I put on a device, and then I just kind of forget about it. I go about my day, I do the dishes, do my errands, chores, stuff around the house,
all of that. I don't really have to think about it. I commend the people that can do the whole manual thing, but I could never do it. Seems really time consuming. And you can't really do other things while you're using your hands to tug. You almost have to be naked all the time, and that's very hard to do. Yeah. Especially if you live with others. Yeah, for sure. What CI level would you say you are now? Are you still at a two? No, I'm at,
like, CI three. I'm so close to CI four, and sometimes when I sit down, I get little, like, rollover or whatever, but, yeah, I would say I'm like CI three. Not really CI four yet. It's not an on off thing. A lot of people, when they first start, I mean, very first start, like, the first few days, they think, oh, once I get rollover, I just get rollover all the time. But what's the ambient temperature? Right. Changes. Yeah, I guess. Restoring was something that I just kind of discovered.
At first I thought it was kind of a joke, and then I tried it and realized it actually worked, and I just kept doing it. There wasn't really a good reason for it. I'm not saying that there has to be, but there wasn't a good reason for it. I just kept doing it because I wanted to, but as I've learned more about it, kind of realized, like, what's missing? Being kind of like, oh, no, there's a reason that this is supposed to be here now I have
more of a reason to restore. I kind of feel like I'm missing something. Makes me want to restore more. I've always been really interested in cultural phenomena or like, social phenomena,
like sociology, that kind of thing. And actually, part of what's so interesting to me about this whole circumcision debate is, you know, learning about all of the different cultural reasons that people get circumcised and how it varies so much depending on where you are in the world and, like, your religious background and your ethnicity and all of that, and how it's like a fairly common practice all around the world. I used to think it was literally just the United States and, like,
Israel. I didn't even know that circumcision was such a common practice among, like, muslim communities until I started talking to other people who were restoring and, like, the support group and stuff. Actually really interesting to me and also to hear their experiences as well because I don't really have a lot of trauma associated with my circumcision, obviously. Like, I'm a little upset that it's not there, mainly because, like, I didn't have a say in the matter.
But, you know, hearing some people's stories about them, you know, being circumcised later on in life, especially where they're still, like, very much aware of what's going on, you know, and hearing them talk about their memories and realizing, like, oh, this is actually something that is serious issue for some people. Whereas for me, I feel like it's not super serious because it hasn't impacted my life so negatively that there's a lot of trauma.
I haven't felt like I needed therapy for it. But I've heard from other people that they have legitimate trauma about this. And that's been really fascinating to me as well, if that makes sense. I don't want to say that other people's trauma is fascinating. Maybe that's not the good way to. Say it can be fascinating with still respecting the pain, because a fascination can be a respectful fascination. Well, yeah, and also, like, the way that people have described their trauma that they have
about their circumcision. I would have never assumed that something that is so commonplace in the US would cause so much pain to people because for me, I don't remember it at all. I had no idea that it was still happening to people who were like teenagers or like, who were definitely aware of what was going on while it was happening. I can understand why it would be more dramatic for somebody.
Why, I should say could be because we've talked with people that it was extremely dramatic, even though they don't remember it. But I can understand why a lot of people would be more dramatic. But from a moral standpoint, I think most people would agree that there isn't really that much of a difference. Because it's all about the consent issue. Yeah, I mean, because we've all heard the dumb argument of, oh, you have
to do it before they'll remember. Right, right. I definitely don't think that that makes it better. If I would have been given a choice, I would have said no. If they would have waited until like, you know, until I was 18, when I could make my own choice about it, I would have said no. I think especially if I knew what I know now about, oh, this is actually an organ of your body. It actually does serve a purpose. I had no idea about that because I grew up in the US, everyone looked like me.
I had no reason to think that I was missing anything. Where were you born? I know the States, as you said. Let's see. I was born in Upper Midwest, that area. But my dad immigrated from Vietnam in, I don't know, probably like the late eighties. And my mom is from the Midwest, so they met at some point and then I was born.
Something I wanted to ask you about is what are your kind of your feelings about having a biracial background and only one of your backgrounds being from a cutting culture, has that affected your views on what happened to you? It definitely has. I always feel like there's two sides of me, right. I dont feel like Im less of either culture necessarily. I feel like I have access to both. But in regards to the whole circumcision thing, on behalf of me,
that called the, you know, the white part. I dont know because Im just half white, like generically white, whatever that means. Historically, physiologically, theres not really a good medical reason for circumcision on that side either. And so while I can recognize like, oh, it's normal, quote unquote, for circumcision to happen for people born in the United States, basically, it still doesn't necessarily
make me feel any better about it. My whole life being mixed race is kind of like my parents having to decide how they want me to present to other people in public, you know, because I feel like I'm kind of caught between two worlds. Whereas, like. Like I said, I don't feel like I'm less of either of those two backgrounds. I don't feel like I'm not white because I'm half asian. I don't feel like I'm not asian because I'm half white.
Over the course of my life, there's been a lot of things like that. Oh, are you going to circumcise him in accordance to, like, what's commonplace in America? Or are you going to not circumcise him in terms of, like, what's more common for vietnamese people? And also, like, things like my name, for example. I have a vietnamese last name. My first name is very, like, typical white american name, you know? So it's always been that between my parents of, like, which culture are we going to.
I don't want to say impose. Use, maybe. Yeah, which culture are we going to use to describe me? And I've actually heard that this is kind of a common situation. Not the circumcision thing. Maybe that's that, too. It's just not very commonly talked about, but feeling like you don't have a sense of place anywhere.
Because, for example, I don't feel like I'm white enough to be white because I look asian, and I'm very clearly asian to white people, but I'm also very clearly white to asian people as well. And so that part of my body is something that looks very odd to my family in Vietnam, for example, not that they've ever seen me naked or anything, but I would feel really self conscious, weirdly enough,
because it would look different if anyone did see it. And so I would probably be a little bit more worried about someone seeing me. Not that that's really a huge problem. I would say vietnamese culture is pretty conservative in terms of, like, nudity and stuff. It's not like in Germany, where I hear people are just, like, walking around naked all the time or whatever. For me, I associate really strongly with my vietnamese heritage.
And because that's not necessarily something that is, like, culturally commonplace in Vietnam, although I actually hear now it is becoming more common over there as the country develops and medical technology develops, they're adopting a lot of western medical practices. Oh, no, that's according to my dad when I talked to him about it. Yeah, I mean, it's still something that I'm very much trying to figure out myself, so I don't feel like I have the best answers to your questions.
I hope I answered the question. It's a really difficult thing that I still don't fully understand myself. And another thing I was kind of curious about. You had mentioned in a meeting that you have intact brothers that were also born in the states in the same situation as you. I was wondering what kind of emotions you feel about being the only one, even in the states. That was cut. Yeah. Okay, so I should go back on what I said,
because I've recently found out that that's actually not true. According to my dad, he told me that everyone in my family, I come from a fairly large family. I've got five siblings, so six, including me. I have two other brothers. I guess they're also cut. So I don't remember who exactly told me that, but I guess it wasn't true unless my dad is lying to me. Well, that's one of the challenges when it comes to this kind of thing, is it's so hard to get a straight answer when it comes to stuff.
This sensitive people will just tell you stuff and that. I mean, it's not like I. It's not really something I necessarily want to talk to my brothers about. It just never naturally comes up in a conversation. Like I said, I feel like vietnamese culture is pretty conservative, and we don't talk about sexual things or our bodies pretty much at all. Hiver, I know that your white or caucasian side of the family, were they more open to talks of sexual
issues? No. Definitely nothing. I feel like it was definitely just something that no one ever talked about, ever. Me, I'm pretty open about things in general, and I will gladly address the elephant in the room when it's very clear other people are uncomfortable. I'm like, okay, I'm just gonna get. I'm the type of person to just say,
like, okay, I'm gonna rip off the band aid. I'm gonna get this over with type of thing just to break the tension, or at least just like, oh, my God, I just want something to happen because this is so uncomfortable for everyone involved. But in terms of sexual stuff, or even, like, non sexual stuff about my body, it's just not something that I feel necessarily comfortable talking about with my family specifically. It's understandable. I don't think most people do.
How do you first become aware that you were circumcised? Probably when. You know, like, when you're in middle school, in the gym locker room, between swim classes or whatever. That was probably the first time I noticed that there was, like, one other person that everyone made fun of for being different. And that was when I was like, wait a second. What the heck is that, you know, that was probably the first time I realized like, oh, there's a difference
between people. But at that point in my life, I never really thought that I was missing anything necessarily, which is how I feel now. So that was probably when I learned the difference between circumcised, uncircumcised, that kind of thing. I feel like that's a fairly common experience for a lot of people in the US anyway. So in the eire, you were the one guy that was singled out was the intact one.
Yeah, because it's so weird. As you were saying, when it comes to different parts of the US, there are some parts where almost nobody's cut, and then there's some parts where they are cut. I should point out, like, I'm not completely against
circumcision necessarily. I'm completely against circumcision without consent because I do believe that if someone has a medical reason to do it, like they have phimosis or something and theyre older and they are able to give consent, and they say, okay, this is causing problems, okay, lets do something about it. Lets take the nuclear option, circumcision, if thats what they want to do, okay, they should have the right to make that choice.
But children who are not really capable of giving their consent or not even really capable of knowing necessarily what theyre giving up. When I was ten years old or 1112, I didnt know that I would want to be uncircumcised for sexual reasons. I wasnt thinking about sex when I was twelve. Thats my stance on it. I know other people might feel differently, and thats okay. I dont want to argue or start arguments with anyone. How did you feel when you first found out about what you
lost? I know you found out that there are two types of people, but when you started diving in and what did I actually lose? Yeah. Like I said, when I first started doing this six months ago, I just, I honestly just did it because I was bored. I was like, there's no way this actually works. And I tried it. It worked.
Okay. I saw that there was some, some actual gains, and I started doing more research into like, the history behind it and why it's done specifically and how, let's just say one perspective of why it's done, from what I've learned, is to uphold certain puritan values in the United States of purity and in a way, not enjoying sex, not talking about sex, that kind of thing. But then I really think about it and I say to myself,
those aren't my values. And so I was circumcised based on someone else's values, not mine. Once I really started to learn about it and then also just lived experience of what it feels like to have just even just like a little bit of skin and like the difference that that's made, it has kind of changed my perspective on why this is being done. Because I started to realize after the small amount of gains that I have had and the difference that it's made in terms of just the way that sex feels,
for example. And I have a hard time talking about this stuff. I apologize. So the way that it feels is a lot different for me. I feel like I'm more engaged as a partner because it feels less like I'm racing to the finish line now, if that makes sense. Like I'm not trying to just get to the end. It feels more like, oh, the entire process is enjoyable for both people. And then after that, you know, like I was like, oh my God. So this is what I've been missing out on for my whole life.
Sexually, I mean. Oh, your sex life? Yeah, pretty much. I had no idea. And then once I found out, I was like, so this might be why they did it. They didn't want people to have enjoyable sex. That's how I've been starting to feel about it. It's like this is a really kind of weird thing to do to people. I find it so weird that people find us to be the weird ones. If there was any other part of the body and oh, I'm trying to regrow my finger, nobody would go,
why do you want your finger back? That's weird. Your parents wanted you not to have that finger. What are you doing? I think it's just like a taboo, kind of like a taboo topic that people are uncomfortable talking about. I assume that most people are like, I was, they just didnt know. I think if more people knew and were educated about what, what the purpose of having forescan actually was, they probably wouldnt want to be circumcised either. Speaking of taboo subjects, feel free not
to answer this question. I know this might be a touchy thing, but how did you find out that it was your mother that did it to you and not your father? Like how, how did that come about? And the whole winning an argument thing. That I talked to my dad about it and I guess the doctor didn't really even ask him what he wanted because like I talked to him, I was like, hey, you know, why'd you, why'd you let the doctor circumcise me basically. Or like, how is that decision made?
And I guess they didn't really ask him for his opinion really. And that's a whole other topic. I really don't want to get into that. They just asked my mom basically, and my mom made the choice and I haven't asked her, but I'm assuming they told her it's cleaner. They told her all of the things about how it's actually a healthier thing to do to your baby. And people can go on and on with arguments back and forth about that and they do.
Im just gonna, you know, take it on good faith that neither of my parents really knew how I would feel about it later on in my life. I think maybe if they did know, if they could somehow go into the future and talk to me, they probably wouldnt have made the same choice. Thats just how I feel about it. As for the actual choice, the decision, im assuming it went like, you know, most other people where youre not really given the option necessarily or its not made to, you're not led to believe
you have an option for your child. They're just kind of like, oh, do you want to do the circumcision? And don't offer you any other alternative to that. It's strange because obviously my dad, being from Vietnam when he was born, he wasn't circumcised. And so a lot of the time I hear that people choose to circumcise their kids because they want them to look more like their father.
Right. But that isn't the case for me. And the only reason I know this is because, like, I have a pretty open relationship with my dad. And I just asked him and he's like, yeah, they didn't really give me an option. How did you find out about foreskin restoration? There was a video on the YouTube by Vice. It was paired with other, like, body modification stuff, which is not really a super good, you know, fit in my opinion. That's actually
how I found out about it. And then I started to research more because I was just curious. It didn't take me too long after that, like maybe a day or the day of where I just started doing it because I was like, huh, what the hell? Why not? I don't have anything better to do. He just dove right in. Yeah, I just did it. I'm a really, like, impulsive person. Plus, it's not something that happens instantly.
I feel like if I just all of a sudden said, okay, I don't want to do this anymore, okay, well, I have a little bit of extra skin, so what? It's fine. I didn't necessarily feel that hesitation of, because it was not like an instantaneous change, you know, it's not like, oh, I'm gonna go get a face tattoo kind of thing, because a lot of. People do waver back and forth and they have
anxiety about that. But I find it interesting in your case, something that a lot of people struggle with is whether or not it's real. But from what you've talked about, it seems like you didn't think it was real, but you tried it anyway. Oh, yeah. I just wanted to see. I just wanted to see if it would actually work. And I tried it for, like, a week, and I was like, huh, there is a little bit more
skin now than there was before. Obviously. I did the whole deep dive thing into all the research, and I looked at the subreddit and I learned all about the coverage index, stuff like that. It was super. I was actually a fairly involved process once I actually did start, because I was like, oh, there's a lot of people doing this. They've done a lot of work. There's devices and everything. There's a whole world of people who are restoring their foreskin, which is
really interesting to me. You mentioned devices, and you mentioned before being able to start with a device. What devices have you tried and how did they evolve over time? Which ones you use? Yeah, I bought the. It's like the Pecker Packer, I think. I think that was just the first one that showed up when I did a Google search and the website looked really professional, to be honest. And that's why I. That's honestly influenced my decision. So I bought that one. I tried it.
It worked well. Didn't really have any complaints about it. Recently got the car one device, like the direct air inflation device, and I seems to be working really, really well. And before that, I used, like a dual tension kind of thing. It wasn't the best quality. It was
just like a crappy, 3d printed one. It worked well for a little bit, but then, you know, I've just moved on to something that's higher quality, and I've seen a lot more gains using the car one and the pecker packer together, like, alternating between the two. What would you say are the. The biggest challenges you've had to getting to the CI level you are now, because you have gone from a CI two to a CI three, almost a CI four, like, both emotional and physical. Oh, my God, it just takes so long.
It feels like, I'm literally watching my skin grow cell by cell. And the more I think about it, the more agonizing it becomes, because I just want it to be. I just want it to be finished, you know? Like, I want to be at the end point already. Like, I want to be fully restored, you know? My goal is to have fuller ranked coverage eventually. And that will take years, basically, but that's my goal. Sticking to it. Who knows? Maybe that'll change. But right now, the smaller goal
is just to get to CI four. Get over that little. That little hump. For people who don't know, that's the. Where the skin kind of, like, bunches up underneath the. The glands right before it kind of, like, rolls over that little edge that's there. So that's CI three. I'm there. My next goal, the next landmark is CI four. And I've just been waiting for months now for that to happen, of, like, restoring every day, several hours a day, just not there yet. And it's so close.
And the thing is, I'm still noticing gains and it's getting there. Like, it's so close, but it's just nothing. Not quite. And that's agonizing to me. It doesn't make me want to do it less. In a way, it kind of is, like, motivating to me because I know once I finally get there, it'll be. I don't know, it'll just be feel like I accomplished something. If that makes sense. You're getting benefits right away. There's short term goals and long term goals and short term benefits. And long
term benefits. Yeah. So, I mean, oh, I should mention, too, part of the reason why this is, like, an attractive option for me and, like, why I'm deciding to do it is just because I am on the autism spectrum. And my whole life I've had issues with being really, really sensitive to my bodily sensations, even parts of my body that aren't super sensitive. Like, right now, my skin is really itchy on the upper part of my arm, and it is
so annoying. So it's like, it's stuff like that all of the time. Just being so sensitive to just little changes in my body, like temperature or just whatever. But obviously something like the glands of your penis, which is arguably one of the most sensitive parts of your body, being exposed all the time for me actually does kind of cause some problems. I know that people say that supposed to keratinize
and you're supposed to lose that sensation. And, I mean, it definitely has, but it's still bothers me partially, I think, because im so sensitive to physical feelings and so thats honestly influencing a lot of my decision to restore in the first place. Thats one benefit, just not having to worry about that part of my body rubbing against my clothes constantly and causing irritation or just. Its just a really uncomfortable feeling. I didnt really realize that that was bothering me so much
until I realized just how much I change. For example, the way that I walk based upon like, what clothes I'm wearing. Because like I walk completely differently when I'm wearing like the car, one device, and I'm like covered because I don't have to worry so much about modifying the way that I'm walking or like choosing the clothes I wear to make sure that I'm comfortable because it's covered, there isn't really much discomfort. Has the increased sense of justice that a lot of people
on the spectrum have affected kind of your views towards this? Like the sense that it was an injustice that happened to you and others? I do feel violated in a way. Like, I really would have liked to have the choice. I think that everyone should have the choice about whether or not they have this done to them or not because it's not really a small procedure. Most people are sexual beings. They will have sex at some times in their life. I'm not saying asexual people don't exist.
Aromantic people, right. But like most people, it's going to affect them somehow, whether they know about it or not. And so I feel like even not autistic people or whatever, everyone who has a penis is affected by this somehow. The entire way I think about sex has changed. And it's not even like I'm fully covered or anything. Just having just like a little bit more skin to work with really has made a huge difference in everything I do sexually.
And not even just in terms of my own pleasure, like my own enjoyment, but also like my partner as well. Because I feel like I'm more like cognizant and aware of my body, but also their body as well, if that makes sense. I feel like everyone should be allowed to have that experience. And once I found out that that was taken away from me, and I would have never even known what I was missing out on if I never discovered foreskin restoration. That does bother me. Cause I think that honestly,
everyone deserves to have good sex. Just to put it bluntly, I don't feel like I'm making the decision to restore because I feel like some cultural or like some obligation to, like, fit in or not fit in. I'm just doing it because I want to. Right. That's. That's, like, the sole reason why I'm doing it. I could care less if what other people think about my body. It's not something that most people are going to see anyway. It's something that I'm really just doing for myself. And in terms of, like,
not fitting in, who cares? They don't know what they're missing out on. That's what I'm. That's all I'm going to say for me, has been a very, like, eye opening kind of experience. And so I wouldn't really want to give that up, to be honest. And that really has only motivated me to keep going. I don't have a reason to stop. And it's not like it's a super difficult
thing for me to do. I mean, obviously, there's the initial investment in devices, which I definitely recommend, if someone can afford it, to invest in a good device that works for them, because it's made the process a lot faster, I think. But, yeah, it's worth it. I don't really see myself stopping. It doesn't feel difficult to me. It's a very passive thing. You just put it on, and then you just kind of forget about it, and it just happens on its own. I had,
like, one. One injury that healed pretty quickly. And then basically since that, I learned more tension or more like, air, more pressure or whatever. It's not always better. Um, you just need a little bit. Cause that's how tissue expansion works. If you stretch any part of your skin, anywhere on your body for long enough, your skin will just grow. It doesn't even have to, like, tear or anything. You just have to stretch it, pull on it,
and it'll grow. That's the same reason why when people gain weight and they lose it all, they've got a lot of loose skin. Because skin expands. That's just how it works, right. It's the same concept. Do you have any more thoughts on how the process has made you feel differently about your body? Cause you talked about how sex was different, but, like, your overall view of your body. I've definitely become more, like, aware of my penis.
Whereas before, it was always just something that I just didn't think that much about. It's just like, oh, yeah, it's there. I'm aware of the fact that it's there. I have one. I started to really feel like something was missing. I've started to actually see circumcised penises as weird. When I look at my penis, I'm like, this is really strange. Why is this not covered? Why is the glans of my penis not
covered? So that's definitely been a change that I've noticed when I look in the mirror kind of thing and kind of motivates me a little bit more. Like, you know, when you go to the gym, whatever your goal is, if it's to lose weight, if it's to gain muscle or whatever, and you can, like, see the obvious difference in your body or, like, someone comments on it and they notice it, it kind of, like, motivates you a little bit more
to keep going. When I see that little bit of progress, like, when I look in the mirror after I get out of the shower, I'm like, oh, wait, this is actually working. Like, I should. I should keep doing this because I made the choice to do it for myself. And in that way, it feels like I have more agency in my life to make the choice for myself. I didn't have the choice about whether or not I was circumcised, but I am making the choice to restore.
Has this process made you feel closer to your vietnamese heritage? I feel like vietnamese culture is conservative in terms of sexual stuff or anything to do with your body. So in a way, like, not, you know, the way I was before I started your story in terms of just, like, being kind of. Just not talking about it very much, it hasn't changed. Like, I still hold that as, like, a kind of a cultural value of mine. It's just not something I really talk about with other, other people personally,
mainly because it's not their business, if that makes sense. I feel like it's really still, like, a very much a private thing for me. The only reason why I am so openly talking about it now is just because I kind of want other people to know that there's other options out there besides just circumcision. And to be honest with you, a lot of people who I have asked, like, my partner, for example, who is a man, has a penis, also is circumcised. And he knows. He knows that I'm doing this.
He's very supportive and everything I asked him, I was like, hey, if you were given the option, like, you could go back in time, would you make the choice to be circumcised? He said, no, probably not. I feel like that's been a lot of what I hear from people is like, yeah, if I could go back and change it, I probably wouldn't do it especially, you know, knowing that there's not really a good reason for it aside from just aesthetic reasons or, you know, whatever other reasons
that people give for circumcision. Yeah. The aesthetic argument is, that's probably the one I hate the most. I remember somebody posting on the some subreddit, oh, circumcise my son. She was a woman. Circumcised my son because I don't like foreskin. Ew, gross. And she had like, an emoji with like a eh. And I was like, hmm. Yeah, that's the thing, too, is people who are like, ew, gross. I'm like, what? I hate to break this to you, but human bodies are just kind of gross,
just in general. Like, we're oily, we smell badger, we secrete fluids from all orifices of our bodies. Like, it's just. Why? It's something that's so private anyway. It's just weird to be like, what are you walking around in public being like, huh? I wonder if that guy is circumcised or not. Oh, my God, that guy looks uncircumcised. That's so gross. Like, why would you do that? Don't do that. I mean, sure, maybe it's cleaner or whatever, but I
don't know. I shower every day. It's just another thing that I clean. It's nothing. You can easily teach your child to, how to, like, have good hygiene, just like any other thing. Did you ever see the Penn and Teller thing on circumcision? No, I haven't. One of the great lines in it is, guess what? We live in a society with soap. Right? Exactly. You don't have any issue cleaning any other dirty part of your body. Like, do you wash your ass crack? That's arguably more
gross. If you can do that, you can wash your foreskin. When people are in the majority, whether they're right or wrong, their arguments don't have to be good. Yeah, that's true. They can be good, but they don't have to be. When you're in the minority, you have to have good arguments. I just kind of feel like people aren't very well informed about this because I definitely wasn't. The thing is, it's like, it's pretty easy to
get information about this now. I feel like with Reddit and just a quick Google search, you can actually learn quite a bit. A lot of people are circumcised, at least in the US, and so some people have opinions about it one way or the other. A lot of people are just indifferent because they. Maybe they just don't know or they. Haven'T thought about it. I find the vast majority of people just haven't thought about it. Right. Can you talk about what it was like to talk to your father about the
fact that you're restoring or other family member. Other family members or friends that you've talked to about this? So I'm, like, really impulsive. Right. And so I was just talking to my dad on the phone because I tried to call him, like, once a week, and I just kind of dropped it on him randomly, just in the middle of a conversation. I was like, basically just asked him, like, hey, why'd you guys circumcise me? And he said, well, I don't know. That's just how they do it in the
US. And that's what your mom wanted. And that's like, they didn't really ask me about it. They just did it. And that was basically the end of the conversation. And I told him, like, you know, I have to fix it now. It's caused me some problems, you know, just like, with the sensitivity thing that I talked about earlier. And that's actually caused me. Caused me issues that I have been to the doctor for because it's, like, uncomfortable to have my glands uncovered. Even though
it's, like, keratinized, it's still. It still is uncomfortable to have it, like, rubbing against my pants all the time. He didn't really care that I was restoring. Like, it's my body was kind of the reaction, like, if you want to do that, go ahead. In terms of my mother, I don't know if I'll ever really bring it up to her. I think maybe it's something I feel more comfortable talking to my dad about because he also has a penis, so he gets it. My mom, eh, probably not ever gonna.
I should point out, like, I'm not actually, like, upset at my mother for doing it. I fully believe that she probably just did it because she thought that it was the only option, wasn't led to believe that there was another option, or, you know, was just told that it was better and had no reason to not believe that. So I know some people, you know, are frustrated with their parents. I'm not particularly frustrated with
my parents. I would say if I'm frustrated with anything, it would probably be like, the medical staff or medical community. I'm not an expert. I have no idea what to call it. But in general, I really would expect them to be more open to having this discussion about whether or not circumcision is the right thing to do or whether it's ethical or not to do it to a child that has consent. Because I feel like a lot of times people just don't
want to talk about it. Even professionals who. This is their job, urologists, won't even talk about it type of thing. They avoid it like the plague. I just wish more people would be open to actually having this conversation, because it is, in my mind, it is important. Touching on the medical community, has that affected your trust in the medical community? The fact that people don't talk about this more and that the medical community
allows this to happen? Yeah, I have a little bit of worry going in for, like, you know, my annual physical or whatever. If they notice that, like, I'm restoring or something, like, kind of worried about what kind of reaction I would get from them because I am a very non confrontational person. So, like, if it was brought up, I'd probably just try to play it off
and change the subject, to be honest. Because as much as I wish that I could change the world and change everyone's opinions, I know people have really, really strongly held opinions, and I don't have the energy or the time to try to convince people one way or the other. I know that that's not a super satisfying answer, but I'm only one person, right?
In terms of, like, my trust of the medical community, I think I would be a little bit more hesitant to get any type of procedure done unless it was absolutely necessary. Just knowing that they could recommend that you have a procedure done that's not medically necessary and just sell it to you like it is necessary when it's not. So it kind of makes me wonder, like, well, what else is there that was dumb, that didn't need to be done.
When you have the profit motive like you have in the states, it's almost like every. Not every doctor, but it's almost like doctors are on commission and they're trying to sell you a car. I mean, the thing is, too, is like, doctors are just people, and so it's possible that they don't know either. Which is kind of its own problem. Right? That is true. But, you know, they only know so much. I mean, but for a specialist like a urologist, if that's your job, then you really should know,
and you shouldn't. It shouldn't be so uncomfortable for you to talk about. It's your job to know these things. There shouldn't be, like, some medical topic that you just don't talk about. Because it's too taboo or whatever. It's your job to talk about these things. Yeah. The fact that most urologists don't know about foreskin restoration is just insane to me. Have you ever been to a urologist and talked to them about this?
Um, not about this specifically, but, like, I went in for another issue related to, you know, like, the gland sensitivity thing that I was talking about earlier. I didn't know that it was because it was my glans. I didn't know that that was the source of the problem until he told me. Oh, you have a really sensitive glands, basically. And that was the end of the conversation.
I didn't know that there was anything I could do about it until I started researching foreskin restoration and realized that would probably help with that sensitivity issue. How do you think you would have responded if the doctor had said, oh, there's this thing you could do. It's called foreskin restoration. Yeah. The weird thing is I think he did mention something about it, but it was so long ago, I don't remember for sure, but it was kind of like an under his
breath kind of thing. Oh, it's because you're circumcised was basically what he said. He acknowledged the fact that, like, oh, this problem was caused because of your circumcision. But I don't really think he mentioned specifically, like, oh, this is what you can do about it. So I wasn't, like, offered a solution to the problem necessarily. That was more something I found out on my own. It is weird how bad they are about distributing information about their
topic. Like, why are they so reluctant to talk about circumcision? It's something that is really commonplace and you never hear the arguments against it. You always hear, at least in my experience, I've only heard publicly, like, the arguments for it. Would you mind talking a little bit more about how sex has changed for you? You were talking about the sexual plateau before. Is there any more you want to kind of talk about when it came to.
Yeah, I. It's definitely different for me. So when people say that there isn't a, like, a difference in terms of, like, sexual experiences in an uncircumcised and a circumcised person, I find that really hard to believe because just with, like, the small amount of restoration that I've done, there's been such a big difference. And I don't know if that is a psychological thing or if it's like a physiological thing. It's definitely different
for me in terms of. For me and, like, my partner as well, it is more pleasurable in general. The whole experience is pleasurable, not just the end result. Like the orgasm, it's enjoyable for the entire time. It's not like a race to the finish line. I mean, that's the biggest thing. That's how it's changed. And in terms of just my overall satisfaction, I feel more satisfied in a way. I'm having less sex, but that's a good thing because the sex
I am having is better. Yeah. I mean, I wish I would have started sooner, to be honest. Like, when I was 18. Who knows? What do you like most about restoring? Honestly, it just gives me something to do. That's not the only thing,
you know, it gives me something to do. But then also, like, I get this sense of accomplishment, and I kind of feel like I have more agency over my body, which also gives me more empathy towards women in a way, because women are always talking about how they're having decisions made about their bodies without their consent. And now I kind of feel like I have a little bit more empathy towards them because, oh, wait, I do know what that feels like. Oh,
wait. This is happening to them all the time. For us, it's just circumcision for the most part. We don't have medical decisions made about us. Other than that, women deal with that all the time. So I feel like that's kind of changed my perspective on that as well. What do you like the least about. Restoring the amount of time that it takes? It takes so damn long. It is a commitment. If you actually want to do it, you're making gains at increments of a sell at a time.
I know that a lot of people suffer from jealousy over this, seeing intact people or people that are further along. Has that been something you've experienced? I mean, I would be lying if I said that I wasn't, like, a little jealous when I saw people who were either intact or fully restored. I'm like, aw, man, I wish I was there. But in a way, it's kind of motivating,
because I see that it's possible to do. I try to recognize what it is as jealousy and something that is, like, not necessarily coming from a logical place in me, but something that's more just like this primordial monkey brain inside of my head. I know you've been restoring for six months, but even in this short six months, is there anything you would have done differently?
I would have started sooner. I would say, overall, I've made good progress, and I've been really consistent with it in terms of changes. Maybe investing in the car, like the air inflation device has been really effective for me. Maybe getting that sooner and also maybe getting in contact with other people who were restoring as well. Before it was just something I was doing alone. And obviously I'm not going to talk to my friends about it. It's just kind of an uncomfortable topic
for me. But to have a space specifically dedicated for it is nice because I can talk about something that I'm doing that I don't have to feel ashamed about it. So you haven't talked to any of your friends in person? I've kind of brought it up as a joke, and they're just kind of uncomfortable about it. I don't push the issue because I want to respect people's boundaries, you know. How would you say resentment and forgiveness factored into your restoring journey?
Okay. I would be lying if I said that I wasn't like, a little bit upset at my parents for circumcising me. Resent is a really strong word. Other people I know feel that way and they have lid. That's perfectly valid, you know, not gonna, like, try to delegitimize anyone's traumatic experience or anyone's feelings or anything. That's just not how I feel about it.
Maybe that'll change. I don't know. I would say that I'm more motivated by the desire to have autonomy over my body or just the desire to be intact. That's like, the really my motivation. So I'm not like, motivated by spite or anger or anything. I'm just doing it because it feels like the right thing to do. Yeah, it's right for you, and it's your body's choice. Yeah. And it's like I said, I'm not against circumcision, I'm just against people having things done to them without their consent.
I guess that maybe. Maybe that does motivate me a little bit, is it feels like I'm taking back some control in a way over something that was done to me without my consent. What would you say is next for your restoring journey? I'm just gonna keep on going, keep untugging, as they say. I don't have any plans of stopping. Just keep being consistent, keeping track of, you know, my goals also just kind of maybe try to spread the word a little bit in whatever way I can. Like this podcast, just like
being here, talking, that's. That feels like I'm making some sort of an impact, right. Or like, offer my perspective to just one person, if that convinces them one way or the other, I did something, you know. What advice would you give to others just getting into this? It can be really overwhelming. There's a lot of information to start with, but you just kind of have to start. It's not rocket science. You just kind of take the skin pull on it.
A lot of people that I've talked to like doing all this research. They think, oh, I have to get all these devices. I have to make sure I'm doing this perfectly. Youll figure that out with time. Just start. If you want to do it, just start. This podcast is hosted by Dick Guyver and edited by Openroads. If you enjoyed this episode, please hit. The subscribe button and share it with your friends. Want to join our weekly video chat? Click the link in the show notes
for details. We also need your help to keep this podcast going for just $3 a month. You can help us pay for the podcast and inspire others in their foreskin restoration journeys. Thanks for listening and look for new episodes coming soon.