#346: Finding Love & Rediscovering Oneself After 50: Inspired by Niamh McAnally's Voyage Around the World - podcast episode cover

#346: Finding Love & Rediscovering Oneself After 50: Inspired by Niamh McAnally's Voyage Around the World

Dec 03, 20241 hr
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Episode description

This beautiful story takes you on a whirlwind journey across continents and careers, culminating into an unexpected love story on the high seas. Prepare to be inspired to set off on your own journey to find true love and potentially rediscover your true authentic self along the way.

Who Is This For?

If you've ever dreamed of reinventing yourself or traveling the world but held back due to fear or societal expectations, Niamh's journey will show you what's possible when you listen to your heart and follow your gut instinct. This episode is for anyone feeling stuck in their current situation, yearning for adventure, or struggling to find the courage to make a major life change.

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What's This All About?

From growing up in a family of actors in Ireland to becoming a TV director, scuba instructor, hotel manager, and eventually the Writer on the Water, Niamh McAnally's life is a testament to the power of inspired action and self-reinvention.

This beautiful story takes you on a whirlwind journey across continents and careers, culminating into an unexpected love story on the high seas.

Niamh's experiences challenge conventional wisdom about relationships, career paths, and personal growth, offering a fresh perspective on what it means to live a fulfilling life.

Some Key Takeaways:
  • Embracing uncertainty and variety can lead to extraordinary life experiences and personal growth
  • Listening to your intuition and following your heart can open doors to unexpected opportunities
  • Overcoming cultural and personal limitations is crucial for living an authentic and fulfilling life


Niamh McAnally Is all but certain to steal your heart and leave you to wonder what else might this world have instore for you. Let her story be the spark of inspiration you needed to hear to have you ready to set off on your own journey of self-discovery and reinvention!


Hey, it's Kevin!


I hope you enjoyed today's episode! If there is ever anything I can do for you, please don't hesitate to reach out. Below, you will find ALL the places and ALL the ways to connect!




Stay Awesome! Live Inspired!

© 2025 Grit, Grace, & Inspiration

Transcript

00:00:01.164 --> 00:00:06.124

Kevin Lowe: Have you ever had a day where it felt like your entire life was falling apart?

00:00:06.564 --> 00:00:10.664

Kevin Lowe: If so, well, then you can relate to Niamh McAnally.

00:00:10.864 --> 00:00:14.784

Kevin Lowe: Because in the span of one day, she became jobless, homeless.

00:00:15.104 --> 00:00:19.304

Kevin Lowe: And the only form of transportation she had were the shoes on her feet.

00:00:19.784 --> 00:00:24.844

Kevin Lowe: At this point in her life, she was divorced in her mid-50s.

00:00:25.044 --> 00:00:29.424

Kevin Lowe: And to be honest, she didn't know what she would do. But thankfully,

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Kevin Lowe: Niamhhas a spirit like nobody I've ever met, and she realized that there was something more.

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Kevin Lowe: And so she would embark on an adventure, traveling the world for a year,

00:00:41.384 --> 00:00:43.504

Kevin Lowe: Working just for food and lodging.

00:00:43.804 --> 00:00:48.404

Kevin Lowe: Now, where her story really gets exciting was the last trip,

00:00:48.624 --> 00:00:53.584

Kevin Lowe: the last go-round, before settling down, getting back to that, quote, normal life.

00:00:53.584 --> 00:00:59.364

Kevin Lowe: She was going to help a solo sailor crew his sailboat from Florida to the Bahamas.

00:00:59.684 --> 00:01:04.444

Kevin Lowe: Now, what happens next? That is only a story that Niamhcan share herself.

00:01:04.624 --> 00:01:08.124

Kevin Lowe: All I can do is to urge you to not go anywhere.

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Kevin Lowe: As a matter of fact, I want you to be sure that you listen all the way through today's episode.

00:01:15.084 --> 00:01:18.124

Kevin Lowe: Even if you have to take a break, you come back a few times,

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Kevin Lowe: be sure you finish it. because there's a story at the very end of our conversation

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Kevin Lowe: that ties it all together.

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Kevin Lowe: It's a part of her story that you never knew you were missing,

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Kevin Lowe: but once you hear it, you realize you can't live without it.

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Kevin Lowe: My friend, this is a story that I hope is going to set your soul on fire.

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Kevin Lowe: It's going to have you wanting more out of life because that,

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Kevin Lowe: after all, is the whole point of sharing it with you. With that said,

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Kevin Lowe: I welcome you to what is episode 346 of Grit, Grace, and Inspiration.

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Yo, are you ready to flip the script on life? Because those bad days,

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they're just doors to better days.

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And that's exactly what we do here at Grit, Grace, and Inspiration. Your host, Kevin Lowe.

00:02:05.071 --> 00:02:09.071

He's been flipping the script on his own life, turning over 20 years of being

00:02:09.071 --> 00:02:14.511

completely blind into straight-up inspiration, motivation, and encouragement just for you.

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So, kick back, relax, and let me introduce you to your host, Kevin Lowe.

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Kevin Lowe: I am in the studio today with a woman who I have been looking forward to meeting

00:02:26.311 --> 00:02:29.851

Kevin Lowe: again because the first time I talked to her, she stole my heart.

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Kevin Lowe: I love her. And I'm excited to get to introduce her to you right now.

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Kevin Lowe: Niahm, welcome to the podcast.

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Niamh McAnally: Thank you so much, Kevin. Lovely to be here with you.

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Kevin Lowe: Oh, well, I am excited to dive into your story all the way back from Ireland,

00:02:45.591 --> 00:02:48.191

Kevin Lowe: all the way to Florida. We're going around the world today.

00:02:50.011 --> 00:02:53.751

Kevin Lowe: And I guess I figure, you know, we might as well start back at the beginning.

00:02:54.031 --> 00:02:58.091

Kevin Lowe: And specifically, I would love for you to kind of dive into a story,

00:02:58.691 --> 00:03:03.931

Kevin Lowe: sharing with me a bit about life growing up in Ireland and specifically growing

00:03:03.931 --> 00:03:06.271

Kevin Lowe: up in a family that were all actors.

00:03:07.251 --> 00:03:12.051

Niamh McAnally: Right. So both my parents were actors. So I kind of grew up in that theatrical background.

00:03:12.671 --> 00:03:16.651

Niamh McAnally: And it's kind of hardly surprising that I ended up in the business myself originally

00:03:16.651 --> 00:03:19.531

Niamh McAnally: in theater and eventually became a television director.

00:03:20.011 --> 00:03:25.751

Niamh McAnally: The best part about it that has been useful for me in my life has been the fact

00:03:25.751 --> 00:03:27.411

Niamh McAnally: that they were both freelance actors.

00:03:27.871 --> 00:03:32.091

Niamh McAnally: So they would get cast in a show for three or four weeks at a time and they

00:03:32.091 --> 00:03:35.351

Niamh McAnally: would never know necessarily where the next job was coming from.

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Niamh McAnally: Now, they were both very good.

00:03:37.131 --> 00:03:39.791

Niamh McAnally: They knew they had the talent and they knew they had, you know,

00:03:39.991 --> 00:03:42.131

Niamh McAnally: the demand, but they would never know for sure.

00:03:42.471 --> 00:03:47.111

Niamh McAnally: So as a result of that, like variety was very much part of our norm growing

00:03:47.111 --> 00:03:50.151

Niamh McAnally: up and you didn't know what was going to happen in two months' time or three

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Niamh McAnally: months' time, people would ask them for commitments for six months out and they'd

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Niamh McAnally: be like, well, we don't know because we don't know if we're going to be working then or not.

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Niamh McAnally: And that really helped shape my outlook on life in terms of reinventing myself all the time.

00:04:05.208 --> 00:04:07.888

Niamh McAnally: I've had like five careers across five different industries,

00:04:07.888 --> 00:04:11.268

Niamh McAnally: but it just seems normal. You just start again.

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Kevin Lowe: Yeah, that is fascinating. Now, you had siblings as well who were into acting also, correct?

00:04:19.868 --> 00:04:24.068

Niamh McAnally: Yeah, both my brothers were in the business as well. they were in front of the

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Niamh McAnally: TV cameras and also behind them and then into radio production and music television production.

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Niamh McAnally: So, yes, there was it was quite a family event.

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Kevin Lowe: Yeah, that's fascinating. Now, growing up, did you pretty much just know like

00:04:37.408 --> 00:04:40.788

Kevin Lowe: after school and stuff that you would want to get into that line of work?

00:04:41.468 --> 00:04:44.828

Niamh McAnally: I wasn't sure, to be perfectly honest, because I didn't.

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Niamh McAnally: My parents were both so talented. I wasn't sure if I would have enough talent

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Niamh McAnally: and I didn't want to disgrace them.

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Niamh McAnally: So Ireland at the time, it was very much a homogenous society.

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Niamh McAnally: And it wasn't a foregone conclusion that everybody would go to college.

00:05:01.288 --> 00:05:04.088

Niamh McAnally: And to me at the time, it seemed like it was mostly, you know,

00:05:04.188 --> 00:05:06.168

Niamh McAnally: people who wanted to be teachers and professors.

00:05:06.528 --> 00:05:12.448

Niamh McAnally: And also, I had read an essay for our leaving certificate, the equivalent of

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Niamh McAnally: like high school graduation, by Cardinal John Henry Newman, which was the idea of a university.

00:05:18.988 --> 00:05:23.588

Niamh McAnally: And in it, he said something that has resonated with me my entire life was,

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Niamh McAnally: it's a school of knowledge of every kind, consisting of teachers and learners from every quarter.

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Niamh McAnally: And so I thought to myself, well, I'm not going to see that diversity in Ireland.

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Niamh McAnally: Now, certainly it's a much more diverse country now.

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Niamh McAnally: But at the time, I also loved English and I loved French.

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Niamh McAnally: So I took off as a teenager to Paris, France, and went to study French language

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Niamh McAnally: and literature at an international class in the Sorbonne University.

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Niamh McAnally: And that opened my eyes to the world, if you like, because everybody was from a different country.

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Niamh McAnally: And also I was living in the family with a French family minding one of the children.

00:06:05.395 --> 00:06:10.875

Niamh McAnally: So I thought, hmm, there's so much to do and see in the world. and I wanted to go.

00:06:11.115 --> 00:06:16.115

Niamh McAnally: But I came back to Ireland at the end of, I think it was 18 months, not quite 18 months.

00:06:16.695 --> 00:06:20.715

Niamh McAnally: And it was time to, well, maybe I should try and support myself now and get a job.

00:06:22.935 --> 00:06:27.355

Niamh McAnally: And it was coming up to the Dublin Theatre Fest. I remember it was autumn time.

00:06:27.895 --> 00:06:32.975

Niamh McAnally: And I got a job working as the assistant stage manager on one of the shows that

00:06:32.975 --> 00:06:37.555

Niamh McAnally: was a couple of weeks in rehearsal and then two weeks playing in the Olympia Theatre, I remember.

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Niamh McAnally: And then that was like, I really like this.

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Niamh McAnally: You know, it was it really kind of helped me with my artistic talents and creativity.

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Niamh McAnally: So I kept going and I was working in theatre for a number of years and then

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Niamh McAnally: ended up with the Abbey Theatre, which is the National Theatre of Ireland.

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Niamh McAnally: And I trained as a trainee director, had another bit of experience over in London

00:07:00.895 --> 00:07:04.795

Niamh McAnally: with one of Sir Peter Hall, who was a director who took on trainee directors.

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Niamh McAnally: And then finally, I moved into the area of television and became a TV director.

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Kevin Lowe: Wow. Wow. So you were the woman behind the scenes, making everything work.

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Niamh McAnally: Right. Exactly. From the beginning, I was kind of like I was testing the waters

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Niamh McAnally: in front of the scenes, if you like.

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Niamh McAnally: But then after that, it was like, no, behind the scenes was where I really felt that that was my spot.

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Kevin Lowe: Yeah, absolutely. I love it. Well, you mentioned about reinvention, reinventing yourself.

00:07:34.475 --> 00:07:40.695

Kevin Lowe: And I'm going to assume from the little bit I know that those reinventions are

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Kevin Lowe: probably going to guide our conversation a lot today.

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Kevin Lowe: And just as kind of like a sneak preview, would you mind sharing as an overview

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Kevin Lowe: what those reinventions were that you've done?

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Niamh McAnally: Sure. So earlier in 87, I had been introduced to scuba diving.

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Niamh McAnally: And I met somebody that was also on the instructor program when I became a scuba instructor.

00:08:04.839 --> 00:08:09.259

Niamh McAnally: And we were together and it was like, oh, let's go travel the world and teach

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Niamh McAnally: scuba diving. We can go to all these wonderful places.

00:08:12.179 --> 00:08:15.379

Niamh McAnally: And at that stage, I was a television director and I thought,

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Niamh McAnally: oh, yeah, that sounds great. We just take off and travel.

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Niamh McAnally: And so that's when I got into the professional end of scuba diving instruction.

00:08:22.599 --> 00:08:26.799

Niamh McAnally: And that's what brought me originally to Belize, where I was working on a volunteer

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Niamh McAnally: project. and then ultimately from there to Key Largo, Florida and stay there a number of years.

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Niamh McAnally: Now, the relationship didn't work out. So I kind of figured like, well, what's next?

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Niamh McAnally: And down in Key Largo at the time, the biggest kind of employer I could see

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Niamh McAnally: at the time outside of Scuba was one of the hotels. It was a Sheraton hotel at the time.

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Niamh McAnally: You know, a little bit brazen. I went down there thinking, well,

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Niamh McAnally: I'm Irish and we're supposed to be renowned for hospitality.

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Niamh McAnally: So how hard could it be to work at a hotel?

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Niamh McAnally: It's like it's like I had this idea like somebody comes in

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Niamh McAnally: and you say oh good evening here's your key off you go you know

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Niamh McAnally: I mean with absolutely no respect

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Niamh McAnally: for all the people who have like gone to college and gone

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Niamh McAnally: to hospitality degrees and everything else like that you know but anyway I started

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Niamh McAnally: working in the hotel they very graciously gave me a job with zero experience

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Niamh McAnally: and pretty soon though they realized that I had you know managerial kind of

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Niamh McAnally: style of working so they offered me a job as the, I think it was the front office,

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Niamh McAnally: a front desk supervisor originally.

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Niamh McAnally: And anyway, from there, I did more and more and I kind of backdoored my way into it.

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Niamh McAnally: I then started doing my certificates and my diplomas and all that good stuff.

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Niamh McAnally: And I ultimately became a manager of a hotel and living over on the island of

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Niamh McAnally: Sark in the United Kingdom, Channel Islands, just off the coast of France.

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Niamh McAnally: And I lived on this amazing island, which was three and a half miles long,

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Niamh McAnally: a mile and a half wide, accessible only by ferry.

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Niamh McAnally: There's no cars on the island, no paved roads and no airport.

00:10:01.741 --> 00:10:08.821

Niamh McAnally: So it was incredible. And it rises 300 feet up out of the ocean, if you like.

00:10:09.701 --> 00:10:12.721

Niamh McAnally: Yeah, it's quite a stunning, stunning location.

00:10:13.221 --> 00:10:18.561

Niamh McAnally: In fact, Enya, the singer Enya actually has an album out called Dark Sky Island.

00:10:18.621 --> 00:10:23.741

Niamh McAnally: And it's about that island, Sark, because they became the first island in the

00:10:23.741 --> 00:10:29.161

Niamh McAnally: world to get dark sky status, you know, where there's no light pollution and

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Niamh McAnally: you can see these amazing stars. So that's how that came about.

00:10:32.981 --> 00:10:35.081

Niamh McAnally: So that brought me into hospitality.

00:10:35.601 --> 00:10:41.141

Niamh McAnally: At the end of 2014, I had been on Sark for five years at that point,

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Niamh McAnally: and the owners decided they weren't going to open the hotels in the year of 2015.

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Niamh McAnally: So I thought, hmm, what's next? so I

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Niamh McAnally: was so involved and addicted to

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Niamh McAnally: volunteer travel every time I went on vacation I would

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Niamh McAnally: volunteer to try and you know live in the community

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Niamh McAnally: and I thought I know what I'm going to do I'm going to take a year out and I'm

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Niamh McAnally: going to travel the world as a volunteer in one direction so start out in London

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Niamh McAnally: and head west and keep going the whole way around the world and take 12 months

00:11:11.741 --> 00:11:17.961

Niamh McAnally: to do it that was my plan and it worked out really well I did some amazing projects like in St.

00:11:18.121 --> 00:11:23.761

Niamh McAnally: Barthes, down in New Zealand. I was in many of the islands in South Pacific,

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Niamh McAnally: like Fiji, Vanuatu, Tonga, French Polynesia, back up through Palau,

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Niamh McAnally: across Asia, and then eventually back to London, right? Job done.

00:11:36.481 --> 00:11:41.241

Niamh McAnally: And then I saw one more project on this website that I used to go to,

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Niamh McAnally: to find these volunteer projects.

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Niamh McAnally: And it was to help a solo sailor crew his boat from Florida to the Bahamas.

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Niamh McAnally: And it was only going to take a month. So I thought, perfect,

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Niamh McAnally: I'm going to apply for that.

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Niamh McAnally: And in the meantime, I'll send out my resumes and then I'll be back in time

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Niamh McAnally: by the time I get interviews, et cetera.

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Niamh McAnally: Well, I get on the boat and let me just say, it was supposed to last a month

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Niamh McAnally: and I lived on that boat for six years. Yes.

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Niamh McAnally: And then and then it turned out one of the

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Niamh McAnally: things is the captain captain gary was

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Niamh McAnally: not looking for a relationship neither was i by the way but when you live 24

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Niamh McAnally: 7 in a 40 foot space on the high seas and you have to rely on your fellow mariner

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Niamh McAnally: for your safety and there's no wi-fi no internet no self-service per se.

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Niamh McAnally: Guess what you do after the day is done? You sit and you talk.

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Niamh McAnally: And we got to know each other so profoundly, you know, through chit-chat,

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Niamh McAnally: but then some really deep conversations because Gary had a degree,

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Niamh McAnally: a master's degree in spiritual psychology.

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Niamh McAnally: And I had spent a year after Fiji, after my first trip to Fiji with the Tony

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Niamh McAnally: Robbins program, which really taught me an awful lot about why we do things

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Niamh McAnally: and, you know, and how you motivate yourself.

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Niamh McAnally: And so the two of us came at similar conversations with similar approaches,

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Niamh McAnally: but they were still different enough for us to, you know, have meaningful conversations.

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Niamh McAnally: So after that, It was like, hmm.

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Niamh McAnally: And then about, I think it was four years on the boat and we were down in the

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Niamh McAnally: Caribbean on a little island or anchored off a little island called Bequay.

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Niamh McAnally: And it was Thanksgiving and the sun was setting and he proposed on the deck.

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Kevin Lowe: Amazing.

00:13:40.060 --> 00:13:43.720

Niamh McAnally: Yeah, yeah, that was quite extraordinary. And then we were planning,

00:13:43.880 --> 00:13:46.880

Niamh McAnally: that was 2019, and then we were planning on getting married in 2020.

00:13:47.520 --> 00:13:50.780

Niamh McAnally: And we're going to have a big wedding over in Ireland. His family was going

00:13:50.780 --> 00:13:55.340

Niamh McAnally: to come over. and my family would be there. But of course, then COVID hit.

00:13:55.760 --> 00:14:00.620

Niamh McAnally: So it took another year and a half. We eventually, we ended up doing a legal

00:14:00.620 --> 00:14:02.260

Niamh McAnally: ceremony down in Antigua where we were.

00:14:02.600 --> 00:14:06.640

Niamh McAnally: And then about 18 months later, we were able to have a wedding,

00:14:06.800 --> 00:14:08.520

Niamh McAnally: but it was still quarantine time.

00:14:08.640 --> 00:14:13.120

Niamh McAnally: So we flew to Ireland and we had a wedding reception for my family and then

00:14:13.120 --> 00:14:16.900

Niamh McAnally: flew back to America and had one a week later.

00:14:17.200 --> 00:14:20.780

Niamh McAnally: Same outfits, everything, just hiked them up, put them on the plane and off

00:14:20.780 --> 00:14:24.580

Niamh McAnally: we went. And we did another wedding ceremony in America for his family.

00:14:25.220 --> 00:14:30.360

Kevin Lowe: Wow. Wow. I love it. Well, that is quite the overview of this journey.

00:14:31.520 --> 00:14:33.340

Niamh McAnally: Just the overview. Sorry about that.

00:14:33.740 --> 00:14:41.240

Kevin Lowe: Oh, my goodness. That is insane. So I'm so excited. Let's go back a little bit.

00:14:41.560 --> 00:14:48.120

Kevin Lowe: And I'm curious about when you finally you went off and you became doing a scuba

00:14:48.120 --> 00:14:52.780

Kevin Lowe: diving. and then that kind of just opened the door to all these new adventures.

00:14:53.360 --> 00:14:59.280

Kevin Lowe: What did your family think of you leaving this industry that they all were in?

00:14:59.440 --> 00:15:02.360

Kevin Lowe: Did they think you were crazy or were they in full support?

00:15:02.580 --> 00:15:05.680

Niamh McAnally: I think everybody I know thinks I'm crazy most of the time.

00:15:09.740 --> 00:15:15.800

Niamh McAnally: I'll tell you when the crazy comments came for sure, it was when I said I was

00:15:15.800 --> 00:15:19.220

Niamh McAnally: going to go to sea with a man I'd never met before. That was like definitely

00:15:19.220 --> 00:15:20.880

Niamh McAnally: on the top of the crazy list for them.

00:15:21.060 --> 00:15:24.360

Niamh McAnally: They said to me like, you know, how do you know he's not an axe murderer?

00:15:24.860 --> 00:15:29.020

Niamh McAnally: And what I didn't know at the time, what we've since laughed about,

00:15:29.320 --> 00:15:33.260

Niamh McAnally: is that his friends were saying to him, you're taking on somebody you never met.

00:15:33.420 --> 00:15:36.120

Niamh McAnally: How do you know this woman isn't a modern day pirate?

00:15:36.380 --> 00:15:39.520

Niamh McAnally: I'm going to take your boat away from you when we're 12 miles offshore.

00:15:43.220 --> 00:15:47.840

Niamh McAnally: And you know i'll tell you what kevin the thing that all of those comments really

00:15:47.840 --> 00:15:51.080

Niamh McAnally: resonated with me and something a decision i've made in my life,

00:15:51.947 --> 00:15:56.067

Niamh McAnally: People out of the best interest, maybe they think they have your best interest

00:15:56.067 --> 00:15:59.007

Niamh McAnally: at heart and say, oh, be careful with that or you shouldn't do this or,

00:15:59.067 --> 00:16:02.127

Niamh McAnally: you know, you might get hurt there, that kind of thing.

00:16:02.627 --> 00:16:09.507

Niamh McAnally: If you allow somebody else's fears infect you, you'll get stuck.

00:16:09.927 --> 00:16:13.967

Niamh McAnally: You won't go, you'll get stunted. You won't be going and doing the things that

00:16:13.967 --> 00:16:16.647

Niamh McAnally: your heart sings and wants you to do.

00:16:16.847 --> 00:16:19.727

Niamh McAnally: Do you know what I mean? so I've I took a

00:16:19.727 --> 00:16:22.367

Niamh McAnally: while to learn that in life because you know early on we kind of

00:16:22.367 --> 00:16:25.767

Niamh McAnally: do things we should do we we ought to do for

00:16:25.767 --> 00:16:28.667

Niamh McAnally: maybe for approval maybe for people say

00:16:28.667 --> 00:16:31.567

Niamh McAnally: this is the best idea for you you know and until

00:16:31.567 --> 00:16:35.347

Niamh McAnally: such time as you step into your own persona

00:16:35.347 --> 00:16:40.567

Niamh McAnally: and listen to your intuition listen to who you really are and uncover all of

00:16:40.567 --> 00:16:45.447

Niamh McAnally: that you can allow that to stop you and And that's one of the beautiful things

00:16:45.447 --> 00:16:49.847

Niamh McAnally: that I've learned from traveling is that now I just listen to my own gut and

00:16:49.847 --> 00:16:51.647

Niamh McAnally: it really hasn't steered me wrong.

00:16:52.187 --> 00:16:58.787

Kevin Lowe: Yeah, absolutely. Well, I want to ask questions and we're going to dive into

00:16:58.787 --> 00:17:05.627

Kevin Lowe: this just crazy thing of going sailing with a stranger and then turned into

00:17:05.627 --> 00:17:07.847

Kevin Lowe: just this beautiful love story on the sea.

00:17:07.847 --> 00:17:13.547

Kevin Lowe: But I feel as though it's important for us to back up a little bit in your story

00:17:13.547 --> 00:17:18.787

Kevin Lowe: because you were involved in another relationship. You were actually married before.

00:17:19.727 --> 00:17:19.887

Niamh McAnally: Right.

00:17:20.127 --> 00:17:23.107

Kevin Lowe: Will you talk to me a little bit about that chapter in your story?

00:17:23.787 --> 00:17:29.527

Niamh McAnally: Sure. I was married. And one of the things the reason I ended up getting married

00:17:29.527 --> 00:17:35.207

Niamh McAnally: was because I was in my 30s and I had that baby clock ticking away in my brain.

00:17:35.207 --> 00:17:37.767

Niamh McAnally: You know, I wanted to be a mother.

00:17:37.947 --> 00:17:44.347

Niamh McAnally: I wanted to have children. I wanted to have a family and I hadn't quite met the right person for me.

00:17:44.527 --> 00:17:49.447

Niamh McAnally: And then I got into this relationship and, you know, it was all very fine,

00:17:49.447 --> 00:17:53.107

Niamh McAnally: but I kind of had a feeling it wasn't the right relationship for me.

00:17:53.307 --> 00:17:58.507

Niamh McAnally: And yet I, the wedding invitations had been sent out and I went ahead with it.

00:17:58.507 --> 00:17:59.727

Niamh McAnally: But here's the interesting thing.

00:18:00.087 --> 00:18:04.367

Niamh McAnally: I grew up in a country and at the time there was no divorce in Ireland.

00:18:04.807 --> 00:18:08.487

Niamh McAnally: In fact, it didn't come in on a limited version of it came in in 1994.

00:18:09.607 --> 00:18:13.747

Niamh McAnally: So I grew up where, you know, you got married and that was it.

00:18:13.887 --> 00:18:15.607

Niamh McAnally: And there was always an expression.

00:18:15.767 --> 00:18:18.067

Niamh McAnally: You was like, oh, you've made your bed. Now you lie on it.

00:18:18.627 --> 00:18:24.427

Niamh McAnally: And that was drilled into me subconsciously, consciously and all through this relationship.

00:18:25.598 --> 00:18:30.478

Niamh McAnally: I couldn't give myself permission to leave, even though I was married in America.

00:18:30.478 --> 00:18:32.418

Niamh McAnally: I was living in America at the time.

00:18:32.598 --> 00:18:35.618

Niamh McAnally: It would have been easy enough to go get a divorce if you needed to.

00:18:36.118 --> 00:18:41.758

Niamh McAnally: So it took an awful lot for me to say, this is not right for me.

00:18:42.178 --> 00:18:46.678

Niamh McAnally: I was sublimating who I was as a human being in order to make it work.

00:18:46.818 --> 00:18:49.738

Niamh McAnally: We were just not the right two people being together.

00:18:50.358 --> 00:18:55.818

Niamh McAnally: And I went to various different counseling sessions. and one woman,

00:18:56.058 --> 00:19:00.458

Niamh McAnally: a lady called Dana Vince, I know she won't mind me sharing her name of Healing

00:19:00.458 --> 00:19:02.718

Niamh McAnally: Hearts Counseling. She was in Florida at the time.

00:19:02.818 --> 00:19:06.418

Niamh McAnally: She's actually up in Tennessee now and she's a wonderful counselor.

00:19:06.978 --> 00:19:12.078

Niamh McAnally: But she listened to me for about two or three sessions. And one day she said,

00:19:12.158 --> 00:19:16.498

Niamh McAnally: I'm not telling you which is the right direction for you to go in here.

00:19:16.958 --> 00:19:22.618

Niamh McAnally: But if this is your decision. And if you do decide this is not the right marriage

00:19:22.618 --> 00:19:27.578

Niamh McAnally: for you, why wait one more day to be happy?

00:19:28.718 --> 00:19:38.418

Niamh McAnally: And somehow that just one question really penetrated all my sort of self-imposed jail, if you like.

00:19:38.878 --> 00:19:43.138

Niamh McAnally: And I really heard her and I thought, yes, I know this isn't right.

00:19:43.238 --> 00:19:46.938

Niamh McAnally: In fact, I knew like very early on in the marriage, it wasn't the right marriage for me.

00:19:47.158 --> 00:19:51.038

Niamh McAnally: And, but I date with that kind of cultural traditions, you know,

00:19:51.118 --> 00:19:53.418

Niamh McAnally: and internal chatter going on.

00:19:53.858 --> 00:19:57.318

Niamh McAnally: And once I got to that place, I went, yes, it's it's OK.

00:19:57.678 --> 00:20:01.258

Niamh McAnally: And, you know, why wait one more day to be happy? This is not good for you.

00:20:01.438 --> 00:20:04.978

Niamh McAnally: And ultimately, it's not going to be good for the other person if you're not

00:20:04.978 --> 00:20:06.538

Niamh McAnally: being the best version of yourself.

00:20:07.318 --> 00:20:12.598

Niamh McAnally: So and that's that's made the decision for me that I had to leave that marriage.

00:20:12.938 --> 00:20:14.978

Kevin Lowe: How long were you in that relationship?

00:20:15.298 --> 00:20:17.438

Niamh McAnally: I was married for, what, eight and a half years.

00:20:17.958 --> 00:20:18.338

Kevin Lowe: Wow.

00:20:18.678 --> 00:20:19.798

Niamh McAnally: Yeah, I'm a slow learner.

00:20:23.738 --> 00:20:29.758

Kevin Lowe: You know what? I think the truth is, is that when we're stuck in a situation

00:20:29.758 --> 00:20:34.378

Kevin Lowe: like that and you don't know what else to do, you just do it. You're just there.

00:20:34.758 --> 00:20:39.678

Kevin Lowe: And before you know it, it's not until you get so far down the road that you

00:20:39.678 --> 00:20:44.038

Kevin Lowe: look back and you think, my gosh, what am I doing? I've just wasted all this time.

00:20:44.438 --> 00:20:46.778

Niamh McAnally: Yeah. And, you know, people have asked me that, like, you know,

00:20:46.818 --> 00:20:48.678

Niamh McAnally: if you go back in your life, what would you do differently?

00:20:49.498 --> 00:20:54.458

Niamh McAnally: But you know what? That experience for me is part of my DNA now.

00:20:54.638 --> 00:20:58.398

Niamh McAnally: It's part of who I have become, the lessons I learned during that experience.

00:20:58.518 --> 00:21:00.658

Niamh McAnally: So I wouldn't change it for the world. You know what I mean?

00:21:00.838 --> 00:21:06.438

Niamh McAnally: It's like that was presented to me in such a way that it's part of who I am.

00:21:06.438 --> 00:21:12.698

Niamh McAnally: And it also knowing what I knew then, once that moment came when I was there

00:21:12.698 --> 00:21:16.558

Niamh McAnally: so long, if you like this, I started out in my 30s and when I was in that relationship

00:21:16.558 --> 00:21:20.898

Niamh McAnally: so long, by the end of it, at that stage, it was too late for babies anyway.

00:21:21.817 --> 00:21:26.977

Niamh McAnally: And when I got to that place and I realized I'm not going to be a mother and

00:21:26.977 --> 00:21:32.077

Niamh McAnally: I don't have a partner either, and I'm certainly not going to start trying to do this by myself.

00:21:32.557 --> 00:21:36.197

Niamh McAnally: Once I got to that, I was, you know, I was upset naturally enough.

00:21:36.357 --> 00:21:39.797

Niamh McAnally: It was something I wanted in my life, but now I didn't have the opportunity.

00:21:40.817 --> 00:21:44.757

Niamh McAnally: I said, I can either stay here boohooing about this for a while,

00:21:44.757 --> 00:21:48.037

Niamh McAnally: or I can try and look at it from a different aspect.

00:21:48.037 --> 00:21:52.617

Niamh McAnally: And what I did was I said, okay, if I can't have children,

00:21:53.117 --> 00:22:00.317

Niamh McAnally: what is it I can do that mothers and family, you know, parents that have children

00:22:00.317 --> 00:22:06.457

Niamh McAnally: and they're raising them and all those responsibilities, what is it I can do that they cannot do?

00:22:06.457 --> 00:22:09.797

Niamh McAnally: And that's when the answer of long-term travel

00:22:09.797 --> 00:22:12.637

Niamh McAnally: came to me because i'd always wanted to travel so i i

00:22:12.637 --> 00:22:15.357

Niamh McAnally: mean i could take off i was independent i was just

00:22:15.357 --> 00:22:19.577

Niamh McAnally: me you know i didn't have the responsibility of raising family at that point

00:22:19.577 --> 00:22:23.997

Niamh McAnally: so i thought that's what i had to do and from then on every time i came across

00:22:23.997 --> 00:22:29.057

Niamh McAnally: a situation that on the surface didn't look good i would say okay well what's

00:22:29.057 --> 00:22:34.917

Niamh McAnally: the gift in this and if i couldn't find a gift i would say okay well what's the lesson hmm.

00:22:34.917 --> 00:22:36.977

Kevin Lowe: That is amazing

00:22:36.977 --> 00:22:40.357

Niamh McAnally: Things go wrong in our lives and we're all tested

00:22:40.357 --> 00:22:43.277

Niamh McAnally: in various different ways and some can

00:22:43.277 --> 00:22:47.017

Niamh McAnally: be minor some can be major and the

00:22:47.017 --> 00:22:49.957

Niamh McAnally: only way i i have found to get through those times

00:22:49.957 --> 00:22:54.377

Niamh McAnally: is to try and flip it on its head and look for something look for some kind

00:22:54.377 --> 00:22:58.077

Niamh McAnally: of good in it what is the gift there's a gift here for me somewhere and i mean

00:22:58.077 --> 00:23:01.437

Niamh McAnally: it could be as simple as missing your airplane you know are you going to meet

00:23:01.437 --> 00:23:05.397

Niamh McAnally: somebody else sitting in the waiting room or in the lounge area that you wouldn't

00:23:05.397 --> 00:23:07.477

Niamh McAnally: have met otherwise, you know, those kind of things.

00:23:07.857 --> 00:23:11.097

Niamh McAnally: And if I can't find a gift, I've got to find a lesson.

00:23:11.517 --> 00:23:15.837

Niamh McAnally: You know, there's got to be some reason this is happening for me and not to me.

00:23:17.317 --> 00:23:23.657

Kevin Lowe: I hope anyone and everyone listening to this just took note of that because I mean,

00:23:23.857 --> 00:23:28.757

Kevin Lowe: that right there is, I think, reason enough for a lot of people who click play

00:23:28.757 --> 00:23:32.377

Kevin Lowe: on this episode is they need to hear what you just said. That's powerful.

00:23:32.877 --> 00:23:36.217

Niamh McAnally: Great. Well, that's good. I mean, and that's the other reason I wrote a memoir

00:23:36.217 --> 00:23:40.557

Niamh McAnally: was to try and use my story not to write a book about, oh, me, me, me.

00:23:41.262 --> 00:23:46.462

Niamh McAnally: But to use my story and if any of the stuff that I've been through on that journey

00:23:46.462 --> 00:23:49.162

Niamh McAnally: resonates and is helpful for somebody else.

00:23:49.302 --> 00:23:51.822

Niamh McAnally: And I mean, that's why I went quite deep and quite personal,

00:23:52.142 --> 00:23:56.302

Niamh McAnally: you know, quite vulnerable, if you like, was to try and share that story if

00:23:56.302 --> 00:23:57.702

Niamh McAnally: it was helpful for somebody else.

00:23:58.222 --> 00:24:05.462

Kevin Lowe: Yeah, absolutely. So if I understand correctly, it would be then that you embark

00:24:05.462 --> 00:24:07.102

Kevin Lowe: on the year of traveling.

00:24:07.462 --> 00:24:11.862

Niamh McAnally: Yeah, it was a little time later. I kind of rattled around for about two years

00:24:11.862 --> 00:24:14.722

Niamh McAnally: in America trying to find out where my niche was.

00:24:15.262 --> 00:24:19.682

Niamh McAnally: And I just couldn't settle. You know what I mean? I tried living in various

00:24:19.682 --> 00:24:23.582

Niamh McAnally: places. I had been in CaliforNiahm. I'd been back in Florida. I'd been in Texas.

00:24:23.582 --> 00:24:27.562

Niamh McAnally: I was running around the country trying to find my feet, if you like.

00:24:28.102 --> 00:24:34.522

Niamh McAnally: And I ended up down in Fiji on a volunteer program. I was down there for about four months, maybe.

00:24:35.262 --> 00:24:41.322

Niamh McAnally: And I got called back to Los Angeles to help somebody and help them drive.

00:24:41.502 --> 00:24:44.782

Niamh McAnally: They'd been in an accident and was trying to help drive them to and from work.

00:24:44.842 --> 00:24:50.042

Niamh McAnally: And I was on the road in LA where driving is a challenge.

00:24:50.602 --> 00:24:54.602

Niamh McAnally: And, you know, the traffic was crazy. And I, one day I was in the car and I

00:24:54.602 --> 00:24:57.082

Niamh McAnally: said, Oh, get me on an Island without cars.

00:24:59.222 --> 00:25:01.942

Niamh McAnally: And I went back home and you know

00:25:01.942 --> 00:25:04.622

Niamh McAnally: what I did the the absolutely normal only thing

00:25:04.622 --> 00:25:12.442

Niamh McAnally: you could think of doing was I I googled islands without cars and believe it

00:25:12.442 --> 00:25:16.622

Niamh McAnally: or not oh Google said I'll help you out there here's three islands that don't

00:25:16.622 --> 00:25:21.022

Niamh McAnally: have cars or don't have any roads per se and there was three of them there was

00:25:21.022 --> 00:25:24.482

Niamh McAnally: one in Greece called Hydra or Hydra is probably called

00:25:24.902 --> 00:25:27.582

Niamh McAnally: And there was two in the English Channel Islands.

00:25:27.682 --> 00:25:29.762

Niamh McAnally: And that's how I ended up finding Sark.

00:25:30.242 --> 00:25:35.642

Niamh McAnally: So that's when I thought, OK, time to pack up in America and head back across the Atlantic.

00:25:35.922 --> 00:25:39.162

Niamh McAnally: And my mother was still alive at the time and I wanted to be a little bit closer.

00:25:39.842 --> 00:25:42.982

Niamh McAnally: So I moved to Sark. Now, the irony of that is.

00:25:44.080 --> 00:25:47.480

Niamh McAnally: On Sark, you have to get a ferry to Guernsey. From Guernsey,

00:25:47.500 --> 00:25:51.140

Niamh McAnally: you have to fly to Southampton or London. Then you got another plane to get to Dublin.

00:25:51.780 --> 00:25:55.600

Niamh McAnally: I, when I was in Florida, could have jumped on a plane in Orlando and been in

00:25:55.600 --> 00:25:57.700

Niamh McAnally: Dublin in eight hours much faster, you know?

00:25:58.180 --> 00:26:01.420

Niamh McAnally: But that's why I was living there. I was living there for about five years.

00:26:01.560 --> 00:26:05.480

Niamh McAnally: And it was then I ended up doing this world travel after those hotels closed.

00:26:06.000 --> 00:26:12.000

Kevin Lowe: Okay. Wow. I love how all these pieces. So, I mean, it's rough.

00:26:12.000 --> 00:26:15.420

Kevin Lowe: It's rough when you look at it from the big picture, but when you look at it

00:26:15.420 --> 00:26:18.820

Kevin Lowe: kind of from today, it all kind of keeps piecing itself together.

00:26:19.200 --> 00:26:21.160

Kevin Lowe: One step leading to another.

00:26:21.920 --> 00:26:29.280

Niamh McAnally: Exactly. Exactly. And all those different professions that I did, they all end all along.

00:26:29.540 --> 00:26:34.860

Niamh McAnally: I have been a writer, but I haven't started being a professional writer until

00:26:34.860 --> 00:26:38.180

Niamh McAnally: 2016, until I got on that sailboat with Gary.

00:26:38.180 --> 00:26:42.680

Niamh McAnally: Because I showed him one of my short stories from back in the day and he looked

00:26:42.680 --> 00:26:46.980

Niamh McAnally: at me because oh Niahmmh you've got to do this full time so I went yeah really

00:26:46.980 --> 00:26:50.880

Niamh McAnally: and on the boat yes I had a little bit of time but most of the time it was like

00:26:50.880 --> 00:26:53.300

Niamh McAnally: galley slave deck duties you know hoist this,

00:26:54.000 --> 00:26:56.940

Niamh McAnally: hang on to that get under the boat start scraping the

00:26:56.940 --> 00:26:59.840

Niamh McAnally: barnacles off so it was a it's a busy busy time

00:26:59.840 --> 00:27:02.700

Niamh McAnally: but anyway I started writing full time then on the

00:27:02.700 --> 00:27:07.240

Niamh McAnally: boat and I started writing my memoir following sunshine and the

00:27:07.240 --> 00:27:10.140

Niamh McAnally: interesting thing all these careers all this

00:27:10.140 --> 00:27:12.940

Niamh McAnally: experience and everybody has it in the same way all

00:27:12.940 --> 00:27:15.820

Niamh McAnally: your life experience all sum up into who you

00:27:15.820 --> 00:27:20.820

Niamh McAnally: are today and and also having worked in five different industries i've got a

00:27:20.820 --> 00:27:24.320

Niamh McAnally: lot of things to draw for so so if i start writing novels now instead of true

00:27:24.320 --> 00:27:29.560

Niamh McAnally: stories you know i'll have a ton of stuff i have a in fact a friend of mine

00:27:29.560 --> 00:27:33.040

Niamh McAnally: gave me a mug that says be careful or you'll end up in my book.

00:27:35.300 --> 00:27:42.140

Kevin Lowe: That is great wow well i'm curious to know before we continue

00:27:42.964 --> 00:27:49.384

Kevin Lowe: I want to hear the full story about how you came to meet Gary on this boat.

00:27:49.844 --> 00:27:51.844

Kevin Lowe: Tell me the story of how this whole thing came about.

00:27:52.164 --> 00:27:56.604

Niamh McAnally: Well, it was at the end of the year volunteer traveling.

00:27:56.904 --> 00:28:00.624

Niamh McAnally: He was looking for a volunteer because he was a solo saver.

00:28:00.784 --> 00:28:06.244

Niamh McAnally: He had come out of a long-term marriage and a long-term land-based career. He was an entrepreneur.

00:28:07.364 --> 00:28:10.544

Niamh McAnally: And he actually, believe it or not, in terms of counseling,

00:28:10.804 --> 00:28:13.924

Niamh McAnally: he had gone to talk to a counselor as well and at the time

00:28:13.924 --> 00:28:16.764

Niamh McAnally: apparently they said to him oh you know

00:28:16.764 --> 00:28:19.844

Niamh McAnally: 80 is not the end of the world and it's not necessarily the

00:28:19.844 --> 00:28:22.564

Niamh McAnally: end of your life but you know whatever age he was at

00:28:22.564 --> 00:28:25.684

Niamh McAnally: that time was in his 60s he said um you know how

00:28:25.684 --> 00:28:30.984

Niamh McAnally: would you want to spend the next 10 to 20 years of your life and he said i there's

00:28:30.984 --> 00:28:35.564

Niamh McAnally: things i want to go and do etc so he bought a boat learned how to sail although

00:28:35.564 --> 00:28:39.804

Niamh McAnally: in fairness he learned how to sail first and then bought the boat but but again

00:28:39.804 --> 00:28:43.124

Niamh McAnally: somebody who was embracing something later in life and saying,

00:28:43.304 --> 00:28:46.864

Niamh McAnally: you know, I can learn it's not over just because I'm in my sixties. It's not all over.

00:28:47.544 --> 00:28:52.064

Niamh McAnally: And he spent about six months fixing the boat up and getting it ready.

00:28:52.204 --> 00:28:57.504

Niamh McAnally: And he was in Florida and he needs some crew and he advertised and I saw it

00:28:57.504 --> 00:29:01.384

Niamh McAnally: and I went, Oh, I've always all along. I always wanted to work at sea.

00:29:01.624 --> 00:29:04.484

Niamh McAnally: And funnily enough, here's is a funny story for you.

00:29:05.284 --> 00:29:12.684

Niamh McAnally: Once upon a time, I applied for a job on a cruise line that did the rivers in America.

00:29:13.004 --> 00:29:17.084

Niamh McAnally: And I got to second interview and yes, all my experience in hotels,

00:29:17.304 --> 00:29:21.564

Niamh McAnally: all my experience on boats, you know, working in scuba diving and working on

00:29:21.564 --> 00:29:23.224

Niamh McAnally: the boats, everything was going great.

00:29:23.404 --> 00:29:27.604

Niamh McAnally: And then they said to me, right, the last thing we need from you is your transcripts

00:29:27.604 --> 00:29:30.644

Niamh McAnally: from your bachelor's degree. And I'm like,

00:29:31.253 --> 00:29:35.273

Niamh McAnally: OK, I want to say, but I went to the University of Life.

00:29:35.433 --> 00:29:39.073

Niamh McAnally: You know what I mean? I don't have that one piece of paper. I have tons of certificates

00:29:39.073 --> 00:29:41.233

Niamh McAnally: and diplomas in all sorts of industries,

00:29:41.513 --> 00:29:45.673

Niamh McAnally: including one I forgot to tell you about, which is for 10 years,

00:29:45.813 --> 00:29:50.353

Niamh McAnally: I was a retirement financial advisor and insurance agent for life,

00:29:50.373 --> 00:29:52.713

Niamh McAnally: health and all that good stuff, long term care.

00:29:53.333 --> 00:29:57.533

Niamh McAnally: And I mean, that was state exams. I had all these pieces of paper that were

00:29:57.533 --> 00:30:00.693

Niamh McAnally: exams, but they weren't all tied up in a bow in a bachelor's degree.

00:30:00.873 --> 00:30:02.953

Niamh McAnally: And they said, well, I'm sorry, we can't hire you.

00:30:03.253 --> 00:30:09.553

Niamh McAnally: And I went, OK. And they would sooner hire a 21 or 22 year old with zero life

00:30:09.553 --> 00:30:12.093

Niamh McAnally: experience, but had that piece of paper.

00:30:13.213 --> 00:30:15.833

Niamh McAnally: And from that, I was like, oh, I always want to work a seat.

00:30:15.933 --> 00:30:16.893

Niamh McAnally: This is not going to work out.

00:30:17.013 --> 00:30:20.793

Niamh McAnally: And so then when that volunteer job came up with Gary, I went,

00:30:21.073 --> 00:30:23.873

Niamh McAnally: oh, here's my chance. You know, I could do this for a month and just live on

00:30:23.873 --> 00:30:26.813

Niamh McAnally: the ocean and see what it's like. So that's how that happened.

00:30:27.333 --> 00:30:32.973

Kevin Lowe: Okay. Interesting. I am so glad that they turned you down on that river cruise.

00:30:34.433 --> 00:30:39.573

Niamh McAnally: You know, it's really funny. You should say that only about a week ago we were talking.

00:30:39.893 --> 00:30:45.873

Niamh McAnally: I don't know if you've heard of the movie Sliding Doors, where they set up this

00:30:45.873 --> 00:30:50.373

Niamh McAnally: premise where this person was actually going down a tube, you know,

00:30:50.433 --> 00:30:53.813

Niamh McAnally: underground to get on a tube or a metro or something like that.

00:30:53.933 --> 00:30:58.373

Niamh McAnally: And somebody bumps into them on the way down the stairs and they missed that train.

00:30:59.053 --> 00:31:04.093

Niamh McAnally: And the story unfolds in two versions. One is their life as it would have happened

00:31:04.093 --> 00:31:05.293

Niamh McAnally: had they got on the train.

00:31:05.453 --> 00:31:09.273

Niamh McAnally: And the other was the life that happened because they didn't get on the train.

00:31:09.793 --> 00:31:14.713

Niamh McAnally: Anyway, the movie is called Sliding Doors. And I was talking to Gary recently about sliding doors.

00:31:14.733 --> 00:31:18.293

Niamh McAnally: And I said to him, You know, if I had to have the bachelor's degree,

00:31:18.533 --> 00:31:22.393

Niamh McAnally: I would have been working on that cruise line and we would never have met.

00:31:23.007 --> 00:31:27.667

Niamh McAnally: And then we started talking, well, would we or would we have met in a different way?

00:31:28.047 --> 00:31:31.827

Niamh McAnally: And the really funny thing, remember, I was telling you I was in Los Angeles

00:31:31.827 --> 00:31:37.047

Niamh McAnally: and I was driving somebody around and I was actually staying in Marina del Rey,

00:31:37.207 --> 00:31:40.127

Niamh McAnally: which is the harbor out there on in Los Angeles.

00:31:40.607 --> 00:31:45.147

Niamh McAnally: At the same time that Gary was looking for a boat, but we never met.

00:31:48.367 --> 00:31:54.307

Niamh McAnally: So amazing. Isn't it? And the whole thing about that is we weren't meant to meet at that point.

00:31:54.447 --> 00:31:58.767

Niamh McAnally: And people have said to me, because we have such an incredible relationship,

00:31:58.767 --> 00:32:02.627

Niamh McAnally: and then they joke and laugh, oh, you little newlyweds, you make us sick.

00:32:02.807 --> 00:32:07.507

Niamh McAnally: But the funny thing about it is, is neither of us were ready to meet the other

00:32:07.507 --> 00:32:09.507

Niamh McAnally: person at that time in our lives.

00:32:09.507 --> 00:32:13.827

Niamh McAnally: We both had our own journeys and we had our own baggage to work out.

00:32:14.127 --> 00:32:18.667

Niamh McAnally: And it wasn't until we were both ready. And I think that's what's making this

00:32:18.667 --> 00:32:21.367

Niamh McAnally: particular relationship work really, really well.

00:32:21.707 --> 00:32:24.547

Niamh McAnally: We've come into it as whole human beings.

00:32:25.067 --> 00:32:28.907

Niamh McAnally: And there's three of us now. There's a me, there's a you, and there's an us.

00:32:29.267 --> 00:32:33.407

Niamh McAnally: Rather than you hear that expression, oh, my better half or the other half of

00:32:33.407 --> 00:32:34.767

Niamh McAnally: me, all that kind of stuff.

00:32:34.907 --> 00:32:41.187

Niamh McAnally: But you need to be your own individual person and not bring too much suitcases

00:32:41.187 --> 00:32:42.407

Niamh McAnally: with you into the relationship.

00:32:42.407 --> 00:32:51.347

Kevin Lowe: Yeah, absolutely. So I'm curious what happened after that month sailing trip with Gary.

00:32:53.007 --> 00:32:57.807

Niamh McAnally: Well, I stayed on for about four months.

00:32:58.147 --> 00:33:03.267

Niamh McAnally: And because the reason I didn't go back to work immediately was because I was

00:33:03.267 --> 00:33:09.207

Niamh McAnally: heading to Ireland for a family reunion that summer. And as time was going on.

00:33:09.467 --> 00:33:13.027

Niamh McAnally: I was not, I didn't get a job for, you know, it was, it was pretty difficult

00:33:13.027 --> 00:33:15.447

Niamh McAnally: trying to do interviews while I was on the vote originally.

00:33:15.827 --> 00:33:20.367

Niamh McAnally: And I wasn't getting hired or nothing was coming through. So I sort of said, I'd stay on.

00:33:20.847 --> 00:33:24.367

Niamh McAnally: And interesting, back to the people, and it wasn't family, but it was friends

00:33:24.367 --> 00:33:27.147

Niamh McAnally: were saying to me, you need to come back to America. You need to settle down.

00:33:27.227 --> 00:33:28.507

Niamh McAnally: You need to get a job. You need to do this.

00:33:28.807 --> 00:33:32.287

Niamh McAnally: And I started to think about it. I said, well, what would I do if I went back

00:33:32.287 --> 00:33:35.847

Niamh McAnally: and earned a ton of money? What would I do with my life eventually when it's time to retire.

00:33:36.107 --> 00:33:38.767

Niamh McAnally: I know I'd buy a sailboat and go to sea.

00:33:41.107 --> 00:33:45.427

Niamh McAnally: And then I thought, I'm already here. Why would I give it up right now? Right.

00:33:45.747 --> 00:33:49.727

Niamh McAnally: So we ended up staying on the boat together for four months.

00:33:49.727 --> 00:33:52.967

Niamh McAnally: And then he, we brought the boat back to him. I went all the way down to the

00:33:52.967 --> 00:33:55.147

Niamh McAnally: bottom of the Bahamas and came back up to America.

00:33:55.847 --> 00:33:59.567

Niamh McAnally: And he and I said goodbye to each other.

00:33:59.927 --> 00:34:04.187

Niamh McAnally: He was like, you know, I'm not interested in having a long-term relationship.

00:34:04.367 --> 00:34:08.127

Niamh McAnally: I've been in a long-term marriage. I just, you know, I need some space and time

00:34:08.127 --> 00:34:10.127

Niamh McAnally: and I'm not ready to commit to relationship.

00:34:10.800 --> 00:34:16.920

Niamh McAnally: And I totally got that, even though I knew he was such a special human being.

00:34:17.000 --> 00:34:21.760

Niamh McAnally: But for the first time in my life, I was able to let somebody go out of my life

00:34:21.760 --> 00:34:23.640

Niamh McAnally: with absolutely no qualms.

00:34:23.760 --> 00:34:28.180

Niamh McAnally: I was sad, but I wasn't clinging, if you know what I mean. Yes.

00:34:28.420 --> 00:34:32.700

Niamh McAnally: And I just said, you know what, Niahmmh, there but for the grace of God,

00:34:33.000 --> 00:34:36.060

Niamh McAnally: there goes one of the best people out of your life. However,

00:34:36.620 --> 00:34:41.360

Niamh McAnally: you're a better human being as a result of meeting him and being with him for four months.

00:34:42.420 --> 00:34:47.240

Niamh McAnally: And you know what? Once I went through that process, it wasn't 10 minutes later

00:34:47.240 --> 00:34:51.860

Niamh McAnally: and the phone rings and it's Gary calling me from Los Angeles.

00:34:52.180 --> 00:34:56.640

Niamh McAnally: Now, the hilarious part is I was still living on his boat in the marina.

00:34:56.800 --> 00:35:03.540

Niamh McAnally: I was driving his car, you know, because he said, oh, well, if you're not getting

00:35:03.540 --> 00:35:04.520

Niamh McAnally: a job between now and then,

00:35:04.700 --> 00:35:07.520

Niamh McAnally: you know, the boat's going to be in the marina you might as well stay on it that's fine

00:35:07.520 --> 00:35:10.320

Niamh McAnally: and i said oh i can still volunteer so i was working like five

00:35:10.320 --> 00:35:13.180

Niamh McAnally: hours in the morning you know polishing the stainless steel doing all

00:35:13.180 --> 00:35:16.140

Niamh McAnally: that good stuff and then writing in the afternoons and so

00:35:16.140 --> 00:35:19.060

Niamh McAnally: he calls me up and he said he first of all said what year did your father

00:35:19.060 --> 00:35:22.400

Niamh McAnally: die and i went that's a funny kind of question and

00:35:22.400 --> 00:35:26.420

Niamh McAnally: i said 1989 why and he says oh well i'm sitting here with some friends and one

00:35:26.420 --> 00:35:29.540

Niamh McAnally: of them is an actress and she thinks she worked with your dad and i'm thinking

00:35:29.540 --> 00:35:36.620

Niamh McAnally: hmm here's a guy who is not into relationships happens to be back with his friends

00:35:36.620 --> 00:35:39.180

Niamh McAnally: in califorNiamhtalking about who.

00:35:41.860 --> 00:35:44.600

Niamh McAnally: And i in my mind i didn't say to him i in my mind i

00:35:44.600 --> 00:35:47.860

Niamh McAnally: went you are so busted you know so so

00:35:47.860 --> 00:35:51.220

Niamh McAnally: anyway long story short he decided to come

00:35:51.220 --> 00:35:53.960

Niamh McAnally: back to take his boat out and he says i'm coming back here to

00:35:53.960 --> 00:35:56.980

Niamh McAnally: take the boat and i said okay no problem i thought i'll find another volunteer project

00:35:56.980 --> 00:36:00.120

Niamh McAnally: for the length of time before i go to ireland he

00:36:00.120 --> 00:36:03.020

Niamh McAnally: said well i'm actually taking it up the east coast of america do you

00:36:03.020 --> 00:36:05.940

Niamh McAnally: want to come sail with me and i went okay sure what

00:36:05.940 --> 00:36:08.600

Niamh McAnally: why not right and he says up to new

00:36:08.600 --> 00:36:12.260

Niamh McAnally: jersey and i said what's in new jersey and he said newark and there's a non-stop

00:36:12.260 --> 00:36:16.940

Niamh McAnally: flight to dublin ireland and i went uh-huh because i had previously invited

00:36:16.940 --> 00:36:22.240

Niamh McAnally: him to come to ireland but in conversation since i learned he was like i'd love

00:36:22.240 --> 00:36:24.440

Niamh McAnally: to go to ireland but i can't go to ireland because all our family's going to

00:36:24.440 --> 00:36:27.040

Niamh McAnally: be there and there's some of our friends are going to be there what would say about me? Oh my God.

00:36:27.980 --> 00:36:32.520

Niamh McAnally: So anyway, he did end up coming back.

00:36:32.900 --> 00:36:36.160

Niamh McAnally: But the funny thing is when he came back and we started sailing,

00:36:36.360 --> 00:36:40.220

Niamh McAnally: I thought initially that meant that he was like, okay, ready,

00:36:40.400 --> 00:36:43.200

Niamh McAnally: that there was something between us and that it would continue.

00:36:43.760 --> 00:36:46.780

Niamh McAnally: And when he got off the airplane, I went to pick him up in his car,

00:36:46.900 --> 00:36:48.580

Niamh McAnally: mind you, when I went to pick him up,

00:36:48.780 --> 00:36:56.100

Niamh McAnally: I looked in his eyes and I saw he wasn't ready and he he was back and we've

00:36:56.100 --> 00:37:01.480

Niamh McAnally: since talked about it and sure enough his his feeling at the time was he wasn't

00:37:01.480 --> 00:37:05.780

Niamh McAnally: ready to commit but he wasn't ready to let me go either um.

00:37:06.867 --> 00:37:11.147

Niamh McAnally: And so we basically took it a day at a time. And, you know, that phrase where

00:37:11.147 --> 00:37:13.187

Niamh McAnally: I like you pretty much, let's see how this goes.

00:37:13.627 --> 00:37:17.427

Niamh McAnally: And that's what we've done. And believe it or not, every day since that,

00:37:17.707 --> 00:37:21.147

Niamh McAnally: or at least on a weekly basis, we check in with each other and say,

00:37:21.247 --> 00:37:22.647

Niamh McAnally: do you still want to be with me? Yeah.

00:37:22.967 --> 00:37:25.607

Niamh McAnally: How's it going? We need to connect. No, really, we do.

00:37:28.687 --> 00:37:32.587

Niamh McAnally: Yeah. And, you know, it keeps it fresh. It keeps us ticking over.

00:37:32.587 --> 00:37:35.707

Niamh McAnally: And there's times, especially now that we're kind of half, well,

00:37:35.827 --> 00:37:39.007

Niamh McAnally: we are land-based at the moment, even though we go out in the water on a smaller

00:37:39.007 --> 00:37:45.027

Niamh McAnally: boat, it really helps us to notice when we're not fully connected, you know?

00:37:45.327 --> 00:37:50.407

Niamh McAnally: Like, you live in a 40-foot space, you are on top of each other 24-7,

00:37:50.407 --> 00:37:54.407

Niamh McAnally: and there's time and room for meaningful conversations.

00:37:54.407 --> 00:37:59.607

Niamh McAnally: But when you get into busy life on land you could go a couple of days and you'd

00:37:59.607 --> 00:38:03.427

Niamh McAnally: be like uh-huh uh-huh i'll see you i'll see you later baba and then you might

00:38:03.427 --> 00:38:10.427

Niamh McAnally: not have actually really connected and so we go through that exercise to to keep us on target so.

00:38:10.427 --> 00:38:16.327

Kevin Lowe: We're all like can you just cut to the chase and where does the love story really begin

00:38:19.347 --> 00:38:22.227

Kevin Lowe: everybody's like enough of this dancing around it

00:38:25.107 --> 00:38:31.587

Niamh McAnally: Well it took a year i think i think it was on the anniversary which we call

00:38:31.587 --> 00:38:38.067

Niamh McAnally: the boat of my stepping on the boat for the first time was january 15th of 2017,

00:38:38.767 --> 00:38:41.927

Niamh McAnally: when he eventually got the love word out of his mouth,

00:38:45.947 --> 00:38:49.187

Niamh McAnally: yeah another slow learner yes another slow

00:38:49.187 --> 00:38:52.207

Niamh McAnally: learner i love it yeah it was it

00:38:52.207 --> 00:38:55.327

Niamh McAnally: was quite amazing and there's a thing on boats

00:38:55.327 --> 00:38:58.907

Niamh McAnally: when you're traveling up and down the different islands you have like you know

00:38:58.907 --> 00:39:02.367

Niamh McAnally: a business card where now they have boat cards and it's a picture of you know

00:39:02.367 --> 00:39:06.207

Niamh McAnally: your boat on one side a picture and usually a picture of the people and then

00:39:06.207 --> 00:39:10.067

Niamh McAnally: you know all the details on the back and that's how boaters stay in touch and

00:39:10.067 --> 00:39:13.607

Niamh McAnally: nearly all a lot of the people out there were couples who'd saved up into retirement.

00:39:13.647 --> 00:39:14.727

Niamh McAnally: They're going to do this for a while.

00:39:15.047 --> 00:39:18.447

Niamh McAnally: Well, Gary had his boat card and it was a picture of him on the front and people

00:39:18.447 --> 00:39:19.687

Niamh McAnally: started asking, well, who was Niahmmh?

00:39:20.087 --> 00:39:24.867

Niamh McAnally: And then you would eventually write my name on. And then that day on our first

00:39:24.867 --> 00:39:30.967

Niamh McAnally: boativersary, he hands me a card and it's a picture of the two of us together

00:39:30.967 --> 00:39:32.527

Niamh McAnally: on the front. So that's when I knew.

00:39:33.007 --> 00:39:38.947

Niamh McAnally: And I jumped in the dinghy. We were down actually in a marathon in the Florida Keys at the time.

00:39:39.067 --> 00:39:42.687

Niamh McAnally: I jumped in the dinghy and I drove around all our friends and all the different

00:39:42.687 --> 00:39:46.187

Niamh McAnally: boats in the Angers and I was like, I'm on the cart! I'm on the cart!

00:39:47.867 --> 00:39:50.787

Niamh McAnally: And they were saying, oh, that's as good as a wedding at sea,

00:39:50.907 --> 00:39:54.287

Niamh McAnally: you know? That's some commitment right there.

00:39:54.687 --> 00:39:56.887

Kevin Lowe: Oh my goodness, that is so...

00:39:57.279 --> 00:40:05.259

Kevin Lowe: So special. Wow. So at that point, because so so when you you guys did the you

00:40:05.259 --> 00:40:06.839

Kevin Lowe: spent four months together at the first.

00:40:07.219 --> 00:40:09.599

Kevin Lowe: Yeah. You were separated for not very long.

00:40:10.099 --> 00:40:10.299

Niamh McAnally: No.

00:40:11.079 --> 00:40:16.359

Kevin Lowe: You reconnect. How long before you guys get married?

00:40:16.719 --> 00:40:21.959

Niamh McAnally: So that was 2017 when I got my picture on the front of the boat card.

00:40:22.299 --> 00:40:27.159

Niamh McAnally: And the proposal was Thanksgiving of 2019. So was that almost three years?

00:40:27.279 --> 00:40:28.639

Niamh McAnally: And then we were married.

00:40:28.839 --> 00:40:33.159

Niamh McAnally: We were legally married in Antigua on our boat-aversary. So it was like four

00:40:33.159 --> 00:40:34.919

Niamh McAnally: years from the time I stepped on the boat.

00:40:35.379 --> 00:40:40.159

Kevin Lowe: Yeah. Okay. We're going to go back to Antigua after I ask you this question.

00:40:40.439 --> 00:40:43.239

Kevin Lowe: Okay. You guys got married three times.

00:40:43.719 --> 00:40:44.639

Niamh McAnally: That's correct.

00:40:46.339 --> 00:40:49.819

Kevin Lowe: We want to hear about this because most people get married once.

00:40:50.659 --> 00:40:53.119

Niamh McAnally: Right. And, you know, like three times to the same person.

00:40:56.919 --> 00:41:03.479

Niamh McAnally: So we had what we called a toes in the sand wedding in antigua and there was

00:41:03.479 --> 00:41:07.239

Niamh McAnally: two couples who were there as witnesses they were also on boats and they became

00:41:07.239 --> 00:41:11.759

Niamh McAnally: our great friends on the ocean and they have to be in in antigua at the time

00:41:11.759 --> 00:41:16.099

Niamh McAnally: or actually one couple flew in especially for their boat was down in trinidad at the time,

00:41:16.571 --> 00:41:21.071

Niamh McAnally: And so we had that wedding, which was very special, very intimate.

00:41:21.591 --> 00:41:26.691

Niamh McAnally: And we were like signing the legal document out of the back of a van on the side of this dessert.

00:41:28.451 --> 00:41:34.871

Niamh McAnally: So very us. And there's a picture of us afterwards where we are like,

00:41:34.971 --> 00:41:36.891

Niamh McAnally: oh my God, what did we just do?

00:41:37.291 --> 00:41:42.391

Niamh McAnally: And the funniest thing about it is that we had been back in America about,

00:41:42.711 --> 00:41:46.991

Niamh McAnally: oh yeah, before that Thanksgiving moment when he apparently had bought the engagement

00:41:46.991 --> 00:41:49.331

Niamh McAnally: ring and I didn't know anything about it.

00:41:49.471 --> 00:41:51.711

Niamh McAnally: And so when he gave me the engagement ring, I was like, wow.

00:41:52.131 --> 00:41:56.691

Niamh McAnally: And then of course we were still out there in the Caribbean on the ocean when

00:41:56.691 --> 00:41:58.751

Niamh McAnally: it came time for this Antigua wedding.

00:41:59.311 --> 00:42:04.231

Niamh McAnally: And the justice of the peace lady from Antigua who was on the beach with us,

00:42:04.311 --> 00:42:05.531

Niamh McAnally: this is a deserted beach, right?

00:42:06.011 --> 00:42:11.091

Niamh McAnally: And she says, now Gary, blah, blah, blah, it's time to put on the ring.

00:42:11.091 --> 00:42:14.971

Niamh McAnally: So he goes and puts the ring on me and I do the wed and all that good stuff.

00:42:15.111 --> 00:42:17.791

Niamh McAnally: Right. And she turns around to me and she goes, and now Niahm,

00:42:17.911 --> 00:42:19.851

Niamh McAnally: if you're a ring for Gary. And I'm like, huh?

00:42:21.831 --> 00:42:25.151

Niamh McAnally: I don't have a ring for him. I didn't know what to do. Right.

00:42:25.331 --> 00:42:29.651

Niamh McAnally: And so one of the lads who was with us as witness had, he says,

00:42:29.731 --> 00:42:30.891

Niamh McAnally: don't worry, Niahm, I got you covered.

00:42:31.251 --> 00:42:33.971

Niamh McAnally: And he hands me his keys. Right.

00:42:36.711 --> 00:42:41.191

Niamh McAnally: So we take the keys off his key ring chain. And of course, you've got that little

00:42:41.191 --> 00:42:42.731

Niamh McAnally: ring that's left over. Right.

00:42:42.971 --> 00:42:46.771

Niamh McAnally: And so and Gary's looking, knowing full well, I don't have a wedding ring for

00:42:46.771 --> 00:42:49.971

Niamh McAnally: him. He knows I don't. Right. And so I'm going, not a problem.

00:42:50.251 --> 00:42:52.931

Niamh McAnally: And then I just out this. Well, there's a photograph.

00:42:53.311 --> 00:42:57.891

Niamh McAnally: And I tell you what, he's cracking up laugh. And he goes, I got me this most

00:42:57.891 --> 00:43:00.131

Niamh McAnally: beautiful diamond ring with sapphires.

00:43:00.311 --> 00:43:04.131

Niamh McAnally: Like, you know, it looks like us two diamonds in a sapphire sea. And I get a key ring.

00:43:07.771 --> 00:43:11.911

Niamh McAnally: Oh, my God. It was priceless. absolutely priceless but i will in fairness now

00:43:11.911 --> 00:43:20.451

Niamh McAnally: i did get him a ring when we got back to land so that is adorable i know yes.

00:43:20.451 --> 00:43:22.971

Kevin Lowe: So where were the other two weddings

00:43:22.971 --> 00:43:27.771

Niamh McAnally: So the other two weddings one was in ireland in county wicklow we had this manor

00:43:27.771 --> 00:43:32.431

Niamh McAnally: and like i said it was it was put off for 18 months because of covid and everything

00:43:32.431 --> 00:43:36.891

Niamh McAnally: shut down and we weren't able to travel So that was 18 months later and we had

00:43:36.891 --> 00:43:40.611

Niamh McAnally: that wedding and there was a lady down, beautiful,

00:43:40.991 --> 00:43:44.551

Niamh McAnally: I wouldn't call her a tailor, a couture called Noreen.

00:43:45.100 --> 00:43:49.280

Niamh McAnally: And in Antigua, she makes these dresses and like she makes them in the cruise

00:43:49.280 --> 00:43:51.480

Niamh McAnally: ship. People come in, they get a gown.

00:43:51.760 --> 00:43:55.900

Niamh McAnally: She like tailors it and then she delivers to the ship, you know,

00:43:55.960 --> 00:43:57.160

Niamh McAnally: so she's got some gorgeous stuff.

00:43:57.220 --> 00:44:00.980

Niamh McAnally: So anyway, she had made a dress that I was going to wear at my official wedding.

00:44:01.680 --> 00:44:05.440

Niamh McAnally: And it was because of COVID, it was hanging up in the closet on land.

00:44:05.600 --> 00:44:09.800

Niamh McAnally: And it was looking at me every time I thought, are you going to eat that biscuit

00:44:09.800 --> 00:44:15.080

Niamh McAnally: or are you going to wear this dress? You know, it was it was hanging there,

00:44:15.340 --> 00:44:17.780

Niamh McAnally: mocking me for about a year and a half. Like, yeah.

00:44:18.640 --> 00:44:21.860

Niamh McAnally: And then it was finally it was one of Gary's grandchildren said,

00:44:21.920 --> 00:44:25.720

Niamh McAnally: when are we ever going to have this wedding? Because I invited her to be a bridesmaid.

00:44:26.480 --> 00:44:29.880

Niamh McAnally: And we just couldn't make it happen to bring the two families together.

00:44:30.200 --> 00:44:33.120

Niamh McAnally: It would have been put off. And I said, you know what? I'm wearing this dress

00:44:33.120 --> 00:44:35.340

Niamh McAnally: this year or I'm not wearing it at all. That's it. I'm done.

00:44:35.520 --> 00:44:38.460

Niamh McAnally: You know, so that's why we ended up with the two extra weddings,

00:44:38.600 --> 00:44:40.800

Niamh McAnally: one in Ireland and then one in.

00:44:40.980 --> 00:44:43.620

Niamh McAnally: In america for him oh.

00:44:43.620 --> 00:44:47.760

Kevin Lowe: My goodness i love it and you know what i mean it's something as special as

00:44:47.760 --> 00:44:52.020

Kevin Lowe: a wedding why do you have to just have with just one you know right exactly

00:44:52.020 --> 00:44:56.760

Niamh McAnally: Exactly and and now you know there's a there's an expression in ireland where

00:44:56.760 --> 00:45:02.380

Niamh McAnally: we say oh to be sure to be sure well you know it's like now i'm married to be sure to be sure to be sure.

00:45:05.300 --> 00:45:08.660

Kevin Lowe: Oh my goodness i love it so i

00:45:08.660 --> 00:45:13.980

Kevin Lowe: mentioned about wanting to go back to antigua because you're gonna have to correct

00:45:13.980 --> 00:45:21.080

Kevin Lowe: me if this is the start of your writing endeavor or if this was just along the

00:45:21.080 --> 00:45:28.260

Kevin Lowe: way because i know that you met two men in antigua at some point that kicked off writing for you.

00:45:28.880 --> 00:45:33.000

Niamh McAnally: Yeah, I had already started and actually finished my memoir,

00:45:33.180 --> 00:45:34.280

Niamh McAnally: which is called Following Sunshine.

00:45:35.000 --> 00:45:41.620

Niamh McAnally: And while we were there, as you said, two men came ashore having rowed a 20-foot

00:45:41.620 --> 00:45:45.360

Niamh McAnally: wooden boat 3,000 nautical miles across the Atlantic.

00:45:45.800 --> 00:45:46.300

Kevin Lowe: Wow.

00:45:47.140 --> 00:45:51.740

Niamh McAnally: Exactly. I was like, what? And to put it in perspective, Gary and I had done

00:45:51.740 --> 00:45:56.540

Niamh McAnally: a 10-day open water passage from the Bahamas down to Puerto Rico in 2018.

00:45:56.900 --> 00:46:01.560

Niamh McAnally: And let me just say it was less than ideal. I remember getting off the boat

00:46:01.560 --> 00:46:06.180

Niamh McAnally: thinking, oh, my God, I've done two open water passages in one, my first and my last.

00:46:06.420 --> 00:46:10.840

Niamh McAnally: And it was really, really rough. And so I was fascinated by these guys.

00:46:10.860 --> 00:46:14.940

Niamh McAnally: And when they cross the finish line in the mouth of the harbor,

00:46:15.560 --> 00:46:22.980

Niamh McAnally: they have this kind of Olympic podium moment where they light their handheld flares and hold them up.

00:46:24.460 --> 00:46:29.520

Niamh McAnally: And it was such a moment and we were out there in our dinghy and I had my uh

00:46:29.520 --> 00:46:33.540

Niamh McAnally: long lens camera with me and I started you know pretending I was a sports photographer

00:46:33.540 --> 00:46:34.500

Niamh McAnally: I was going click click click,

00:46:35.020 --> 00:46:39.640

Niamh McAnally: and at one moment I just turned around to Gary I goosebumps I'm actually getting

00:46:39.640 --> 00:46:44.240

Niamh McAnally: them now talking to you about it I just said oh my god Gary I've got the shot

00:46:44.240 --> 00:46:47.100

Niamh McAnally: now I didn't know what was going to be for I didn't know it was going to be

00:46:47.100 --> 00:46:50.100

Niamh McAnally: anything and I turned around I was actually crying at that point,

00:46:50.200 --> 00:46:51.340

Niamh McAnally: just because it was so incredible.

00:46:51.580 --> 00:46:56.080

Niamh McAnally: And I said to him, I said, this moment is going to live with me for the rest of my life.

00:46:57.760 --> 00:47:03.020

Niamh McAnally: And we dingied back to shore. They came ashore and they literally had to be

00:47:03.020 --> 00:47:06.200

Niamh McAnally: helped off because they were what I call marine lagged.

00:47:06.320 --> 00:47:09.920

Niamh McAnally: You know, their legs weren't wobbly because they'd been on the ocean for so long.

00:47:10.360 --> 00:47:13.540

Niamh McAnally: And we found out that they had no family on island to greet them.

00:47:13.700 --> 00:47:16.520

Niamh McAnally: Now there was locals and there was a couple of people from the race officials

00:47:16.520 --> 00:47:18.520

Niamh McAnally: who were there to greet them.

00:47:19.039 --> 00:47:24.799

Niamh McAnally: And so we went over to them after the whole ceremony was over and we invited

00:47:24.799 --> 00:47:29.039

Niamh McAnally: them on to our sailboat for their first home cooked meal the following night.

00:47:29.219 --> 00:47:31.759

Niamh McAnally: And we showed them the photograph I'd taken.

00:47:32.159 --> 00:47:38.559

Niamh McAnally: And one of the lads, Paul, he was 55 at the time and his partner doing the rowing with him was 65.

00:47:39.119 --> 00:47:44.499

Niamh McAnally: And Paul had started out to do this challenge because he had survived a brain hemorrhage.

00:47:44.599 --> 00:47:47.859

Niamh McAnally: He was a firefighter and he thought, oh, I'm going to do something good with

00:47:47.859 --> 00:47:51.479

Niamh McAnally: my life. And so he decided he was going to do the toughest challenge you could find.

00:47:51.859 --> 00:47:54.999

Niamh McAnally: And that was to roll across the Atlantic. There was only one slight problem.

00:47:55.059 --> 00:47:57.099

Niamh McAnally: He didn't have a rowboat and he'd never learned to row before.

00:47:59.299 --> 00:48:03.319

Niamh McAnally: Why would that stop him? So, so I showed him this photograph and I,

00:48:03.399 --> 00:48:08.499

Niamh McAnally: and he said to me, he said, that doesn't just sum up the 70 days at sea,

00:48:08.559 --> 00:48:12.479

Niamh McAnally: but it also sums up the four year struggle it took to get to the starting line.

00:48:13.139 --> 00:48:16.099

Niamh McAnally: And we started talking about it and they

00:48:16.099 --> 00:48:18.959

Niamh McAnally: found out I was a writer and I was fascinated by

00:48:18.959 --> 00:48:21.579

Niamh McAnally: their story and it was like you couldn't make this up if you

00:48:21.579 --> 00:48:24.659

Niamh McAnally: put this in a novel people wouldn't believe you they'd say oh it's contrived

00:48:24.659 --> 00:48:27.379

Niamh McAnally: so I said to them yeah I'd be interested in

00:48:27.379 --> 00:48:30.899

Niamh McAnally: writing their true story on one condition it

00:48:30.899 --> 00:48:34.539

Niamh McAnally: couldn't be about how to row an ocean but

00:48:34.539 --> 00:48:38.079

Niamh McAnally: if they would dig deep spiritually psychologically and

00:48:38.079 --> 00:48:40.839

Niamh McAnally: emotionally as to why they rode the

00:48:40.839 --> 00:48:44.839

Niamh McAnally: ocean how it affected their families and

00:48:44.839 --> 00:48:49.659

Niamh McAnally: after they had time to reflect how had the experience changed them as human

00:48:49.659 --> 00:48:54.999

Niamh McAnally: beings i said that's the story i'd be very happy to write and that's what it

00:48:54.999 --> 00:48:59.839

Niamh McAnally: is and and it turned out that that photograph became the front cover of flares

00:48:59.839 --> 00:49:03.019

Niamh McAnally: up a story bigger than the atlantic Wow.

00:49:03.479 --> 00:49:09.839

Kevin Lowe: Wow, that is so amazing Again, the puzzle pieces They just fit together

00:49:10.847 --> 00:49:15.687

Niamh McAnally: Absolutely. And I was working with that book for, it took me about a year and

00:49:15.687 --> 00:49:17.727

Niamh McAnally: a half to write because I couldn't write it out of my head.

00:49:17.827 --> 00:49:20.667

Niamh McAnally: It was all Zoom call interviews. This is all during COVID as well.

00:49:20.887 --> 00:49:25.727

Niamh McAnally: Zoom call interviews, emails, phone calls, everything to try and get the story,

00:49:25.927 --> 00:49:29.307

Niamh McAnally: but not just the story, but to get their feelings behind it.

00:49:29.307 --> 00:49:32.727

Niamh McAnally: You know, every time they'd send me a little note saying, oh, this happened this day.

00:49:32.867 --> 00:49:35.687

Niamh McAnally: Yeah, well, how did you feel about that? And what did you think about that?

00:49:35.807 --> 00:49:39.167

Niamh McAnally: What happened when you called your family? All those kind of things, you know.

00:49:39.347 --> 00:49:44.827

Niamh McAnally: And I interviewed all of his, their wives, their people that they worked with,

00:49:45.347 --> 00:49:47.107

Niamh McAnally: children, so many people.

00:49:47.207 --> 00:49:50.547

Niamh McAnally: And even the guy who built the boat originally to try and get it authentic.

00:49:50.547 --> 00:49:53.407

Niamh McAnally: And I wrote it to read like a novel.

00:49:54.247 --> 00:49:58.867

Niamh McAnally: And the beauty of it is, and this is a God-given talent I got.

00:49:58.867 --> 00:50:06.127

Niamh McAnally: Yes, I learned my craft of writing, but I have this innate ability to put people in the situation.

00:50:06.307 --> 00:50:09.827

Niamh McAnally: And the amount of people have come back to me and said, I felt I was in that

00:50:09.827 --> 00:50:14.367

Niamh McAnally: boat with them the whole way over, you know. And I mean, it's not all just in the boat.

00:50:14.607 --> 00:50:18.947

Niamh McAnally: Obviously, the whole run up to it. I think the first third of the book is actually

00:50:18.947 --> 00:50:21.107

Niamh McAnally: them preparing and, you know, their family dynamic.

00:50:21.407 --> 00:50:24.447

Niamh McAnally: And so it's not all in the boat. And then, of course, you see what happens to

00:50:24.447 --> 00:50:25.287

Niamh McAnally: them afterwards. words.

00:50:25.907 --> 00:50:30.647

Niamh McAnally: So after I'd finished all that and we had it out, it was published by a UK publisher.

00:50:30.847 --> 00:50:33.067

Niamh McAnally: And then we were doing some marketing on that.

00:50:33.367 --> 00:50:37.667

Niamh McAnally: Then I went back to my memoir, Following Sunshine, and I brought it up to date

00:50:37.667 --> 00:50:40.667

Niamh McAnally: in the epilogue to the moment that I took that photograph.

00:50:41.347 --> 00:50:46.707

Niamh McAnally: And so it just came out. And the subtitle of Following Sunshine is A Voyage

00:50:46.707 --> 00:50:49.847

Niamh McAnally: Around the Mind, Around the World, Around the Heart.

00:50:50.447 --> 00:50:53.127

Niamh McAnally: And it's my story. And that first part around the

00:50:53.127 --> 00:50:56.887

Niamh McAnally: mind is like what we've been talking about growing up in ireland how it was

00:50:56.887 --> 00:51:00.787

Niamh McAnally: impactful you know growing up in the family i grew up in and then the second

00:51:00.787 --> 00:51:04.347

Niamh McAnally: part is around the world which is that year i spent volunteering in all these

00:51:04.347 --> 00:51:09.387

Niamh McAnally: different places and the third one around the heart is from the moment i stepped

00:51:09.387 --> 00:51:12.067

Niamh McAnally: on the sailboat and met gary krieger oh.

00:51:12.067 --> 00:51:15.707

Kevin Lowe: My goodness yeah that sounds amazing

00:51:15.707 --> 00:51:19.627

Niamh McAnally: Yeah it's a good it's a good old read let me tell you and.

00:51:19.627 --> 00:51:24.907

Kevin Lowe: And for somebody dying to read it where can people go to to purchase this book

00:51:24.907 --> 00:51:32.067

Niamh McAnally: So in america yeah obviously it's on amazon and it's in local bookstores and

00:51:32.067 --> 00:51:36.567

Niamh McAnally: the best place to follow me or to find me and find all my different things that

00:51:36.567 --> 00:51:41.787

Niamh McAnally: are coming out in new books etc is on my website which coincidentally is called

00:51:41.787 --> 00:51:44.427

Niamh McAnally: the writer on the water.com.

00:51:45.425 --> 00:51:46.065

Kevin Lowe: Original.

00:51:46.665 --> 00:51:47.285

Niamh McAnally: Yeah, very original.

00:51:49.305 --> 00:51:54.085

Niamh McAnally: Let's just put it this way. It's a whole lot easier to spell when I'm doing a radio interview.

00:51:54.265 --> 00:51:57.045

Niamh McAnally: People are like, what? Rather than my name, right? Which, as you know,

00:51:57.085 --> 00:52:00.165

Niamh McAnally: is a Gaelic name. So there's a lot of letters and consonants in there.

00:52:00.325 --> 00:52:03.585

Niamh McAnally: So my whole brand is called TheWriterOnTheWater.com.

00:52:04.105 --> 00:52:11.045

Kevin Lowe: The Writer on the Water. What a beautiful name for a beautiful story with a

00:52:11.045 --> 00:52:16.585

Kevin Lowe: beautiful woman. And honest to goodness, you yourself are amazing.

00:52:17.005 --> 00:52:20.545

Kevin Lowe: Your story is just so joy-filled.

00:52:20.785 --> 00:52:26.165

Kevin Lowe: I think that's honestly the thing that I love the most about you and your story

00:52:26.165 --> 00:52:31.005

Kevin Lowe: is a perspective on life that I wish more of us had.

00:52:31.205 --> 00:52:34.745

Kevin Lowe: Of looking at life for the beauty, for the joy.

00:52:35.125 --> 00:52:39.745

Kevin Lowe: And finding those little moments in amongst it all to just appreciate it.

00:52:39.745 --> 00:52:46.685

Kevin Lowe: And listening to you and telling the story that's turned into this just amazing love story.

00:52:47.005 --> 00:52:51.685

Kevin Lowe: I think it gives all of us a little bit of hope, no matter where we are in life,

00:52:52.185 --> 00:52:57.805

Kevin Lowe: that sometimes you just got to keep going because you never know what the decisions

00:52:57.805 --> 00:53:00.125

Kevin Lowe: you make today, how they're going to impact tomorrow.

00:53:00.885 --> 00:53:04.565

Niamh McAnally: Absolutely. And I mean, speaking of joy, there's no one better than you than

00:53:04.565 --> 00:53:10.345

Niamh McAnally: looking at life through joyful eyes and, you know, and encouraging everybody else with your podcast.

00:53:10.745 --> 00:53:14.845

Niamh McAnally: And I think the one thing that I would share from my experience is,

00:53:14.965 --> 00:53:17.145

Niamh McAnally: number one, it's never too late.

00:53:17.945 --> 00:53:21.045

Niamh McAnally: And number two, never put off a dream.

00:53:22.125 --> 00:53:25.505

Kevin Lowe: I agree. I love it. Before we end,

00:53:25.665 --> 00:53:26.585

Niamh McAnally: Is there anything.

00:53:26.585 --> 00:53:28.445

Kevin Lowe: Else that you want to be sure

00:53:28.445 --> 00:53:29.605

Niamh McAnally: That this person.

00:53:29.605 --> 00:53:34.325

Kevin Lowe: Listening today knows about you about your story about what you do or what you have coming up

00:53:34.325 --> 00:53:37.385

Niamh McAnally: Yeah let me just very briefly tell you about my

00:53:37.385 --> 00:53:44.585

Niamh McAnally: time in Bora Bora in French Polynesia oh yes I kept putting that off and the

00:53:44.585 --> 00:53:48.745

Niamh McAnally: reason I put it off was number one it's a very expensive destination it swallows

00:53:48.745 --> 00:53:55.285

Niamh McAnally: your firstborn your wallet your house everything right and number two it is

00:53:55.285 --> 00:53:57.025

Niamh McAnally: the honeymoon capital of the world.

00:53:57.285 --> 00:54:00.745

Niamh McAnally: So I was single at that time trying to find my place when I was going around

00:54:00.745 --> 00:54:03.445

Niamh McAnally: was before I met Gary and I kept putting it off.

00:54:03.625 --> 00:54:08.945

Niamh McAnally: And then finally I found a way and I ended up staying eight nights on Bora Bora,

00:54:09.045 --> 00:54:12.125

Niamh McAnally: the main island for the price of one night on one of the resorts.

00:54:12.805 --> 00:54:18.525

Niamh McAnally: And I found a little pension and I ate from food trucks and I got to experience

00:54:18.525 --> 00:54:24.605

Niamh McAnally: the incredible, beautiful blue Azure Lagoon and the whole experience.

00:54:25.045 --> 00:54:29.245

Niamh McAnally: And that taught me the lesson, never, ever, ever put off a dream.

00:54:30.625 --> 00:54:38.885

Niamh McAnally: And also, we don't know how we as one human being can impact another person.

00:54:40.078 --> 00:54:45.538

Niamh McAnally: And a story that came up during the it's actually in the writing of a little

00:54:45.538 --> 00:54:47.938

Niamh McAnally: bit of a spoiler alert. It's in the writing of Following Sunshine.

00:54:48.538 --> 00:54:52.238

Niamh McAnally: Years and years ago, when I was in one of those despondent places is after,

00:54:52.238 --> 00:54:56.198

Niamh McAnally: you know, I was out of a relationship and I didn't know what direction to go in.

00:54:56.378 --> 00:54:59.238

Niamh McAnally: I ended up sponsoring a kid from Bolivia.

00:54:59.438 --> 00:55:01.858

Niamh McAnally: You know, back in the day, you were able, oh, here's a charity.

00:55:02.118 --> 00:55:05.218

Niamh McAnally: And, you know, you write to the kid every week and you sponsor them to help

00:55:05.218 --> 00:55:08.498

Niamh McAnally: them either get more programs at school or something like that.

00:55:09.478 --> 00:55:15.338

Niamh McAnally: And I did that and I did it for two reasons one I made it my number one job no matter what I,

00:55:15.878 --> 00:55:18.698

Niamh McAnally: position I was in financial I was going to do that every month and number two

00:55:18.698 --> 00:55:25.378

Niamh McAnally: I wasn't going to tell anybody and back to my whole psyche of freelance variety

00:55:25.378 --> 00:55:29.618

Niamh McAnally: start again it was the longest commitment of my life that I had ever done at

00:55:29.618 --> 00:55:33.458

Niamh McAnally: that point which was 10 years to do this every month and write back and forth.

00:55:34.058 --> 00:55:39.478

Niamh McAnally: And when the kid turned 18, the charity said, okay, you're done and dusted.

00:55:39.598 --> 00:55:42.838

Niamh McAnally: Here's another kid you could start with. And I went, no, I'd like to keep writing to him.

00:55:42.978 --> 00:55:45.158

Niamh McAnally: Thank you very much. And said, no, we can't give you his details.

00:55:46.118 --> 00:55:51.318

Niamh McAnally: So years and years and years and years passed by and I was never able to find him.

00:55:51.458 --> 00:55:57.498

Niamh McAnally: And then one day I'm on the boat with Gary and this friend request comes up

00:55:57.498 --> 00:55:58.958

Niamh McAnally: on Facebook and I'm like,

00:55:59.078 --> 00:56:01.978

Niamh McAnally: the name is kind of familiar but i don't have no mutual friends

00:56:01.978 --> 00:56:05.178

Niamh McAnally: who's this and it turned out to be the boy

00:56:05.178 --> 00:56:08.438

Niamh McAnally: ivan who's now a man and guess

00:56:08.438 --> 00:56:14.458

Niamh McAnally: what he became he from bolivia went on through that whole schooling and he became

00:56:14.458 --> 00:56:22.978

Niamh McAnally: a doctor and he studied for nine years in cuba and then went back to bolivia

00:56:22.978 --> 00:56:26.338

Niamh McAnally: to his local town and became the doctor in the local town.

00:56:26.538 --> 00:56:31.078

Niamh McAnally: And I was like, oh my God, you know, we've no idea how we can impact another

00:56:31.078 --> 00:56:34.518

Niamh McAnally: human being. And now talk about the butterfly effect.

00:56:34.958 --> 00:56:38.278

Niamh McAnally: Look how he's impacting other people by taking care of them,

00:56:38.458 --> 00:56:40.398

Niamh McAnally: you know, in remote areas.

00:56:40.678 --> 00:56:46.898

Kevin Lowe: It's incredible. You know what it goes back to is love, is caring for one another,

00:56:47.398 --> 00:56:51.138

Kevin Lowe: for taking the time to be there for one another.

00:56:52.278 --> 00:56:55.898

Kevin Lowe: And you have to look at that and you have to know in your heart

00:56:57.020 --> 00:57:01.980

Kevin Lowe: You had to play a massive role in where that where that man is today.

00:57:02.480 --> 00:57:05.860

Niamh McAnally: Yeah. And Gary said to me, he said something like that to me.

00:57:05.920 --> 00:57:09.240

Niamh McAnally: And I said, no, I just wrote to him and, you know, exchange letters and all that kind of good stuff.

00:57:09.940 --> 00:57:13.660

Niamh McAnally: Well, here's a massive spoiler alert. I'm only telling you I haven't told anybody

00:57:13.660 --> 00:57:16.180

Niamh McAnally: else in any any conversations or interviews I did.

00:57:16.320 --> 00:57:21.040

Niamh McAnally: I said to him someday I want to meet him and I can't go to Bolivia because where

00:57:21.040 --> 00:57:24.800

Niamh McAnally: he lives is like way up in the mountains. and I suffer from altitude sickness.

00:57:25.360 --> 00:57:28.300

Niamh McAnally: Well, for my birthday this year, I have four rules.

00:57:28.460 --> 00:57:32.640

Niamh McAnally: One is I always celebrate on the day, not the Saturday before or after because

00:57:32.640 --> 00:57:35.320

Niamh McAnally: somebody else wants to not have a hangover going after a party.

00:57:37.460 --> 00:57:42.700

Niamh McAnally: And number three, I celebrate Mother's Day on that, Mother's and Father's Day

00:57:42.700 --> 00:57:45.960

Niamh McAnally: on that day, not the day that the card company tells me to do it because that's

00:57:45.960 --> 00:57:47.060

Niamh McAnally: the day they became my parents.

00:57:47.340 --> 00:57:51.280

Niamh McAnally: And number four, I have to do something I have never done before in my whole life.

00:57:51.280 --> 00:57:54.080

Niamh McAnally: And this year it was like i'm running out

00:57:54.080 --> 00:57:57.100

Niamh McAnally: of things because i've done quite a little bit of things right and i

00:57:57.100 --> 00:58:00.000

Niamh McAnally: went i want to go meet him and it

00:58:00.000 --> 00:58:05.300

Niamh McAnally: turned out he's back doing his special his specialty in hematology in cuba and

00:58:05.300 --> 00:58:12.160

Niamh McAnally: we went down and we met him in person for the first time ever oh my gosh i know

00:58:12.160 --> 00:58:18.920

Niamh McAnally: i can't i can't tell you how amazing that experience was yes wow Well.

00:58:19.380 --> 00:58:25.180

Kevin Lowe: Niahm, if you have made my day, I can only imagine for whoever is listening,

00:58:25.380 --> 00:58:27.880

Kevin Lowe: wherever in the world they are, that you've made their day.

00:58:28.260 --> 00:58:33.680

Kevin Lowe: Thank you from the bottom of my heart for being here today to get to share just

00:58:33.680 --> 00:58:38.900

Kevin Lowe: this little piece of your story with me, with my listeners. It means the world.

00:58:39.780 --> 00:58:43.980

Niamh McAnally: Well, thank you so much. I love talking with you. You are such an inspiration yourself.

00:58:44.440 --> 00:58:51.740

Kevin Lowe: Oh, well, thank you so much. And for you listening, wow, what an interview that was.

00:58:51.900 --> 00:58:57.140

Kevin Lowe: A conversation with a woman who is just a ray of sunlight.

00:58:57.320 --> 00:59:04.080

Kevin Lowe: An amazing soul who, I feel like we're all just been blessed by her presence today.

00:59:04.400 --> 00:59:08.300

Kevin Lowe: So my friend, if there's somebody you're thinking of that you know would love

00:59:08.300 --> 00:59:11.080

Kevin Lowe: to hear this, be sure to share today's episode with them.

00:59:11.080 --> 00:59:16.740

Kevin Lowe: And if anything else, just take something you heard today, put it into action

00:59:16.740 --> 00:59:21.920

Kevin Lowe: in your life, always in the hope of making today a little bit better than yesterday

00:59:21.920 --> 00:59:24.200

Kevin Lowe: and tomorrow even better than next.

00:59:24.080 --> 00:59:43.707

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