ITS Home Edition: Ashe

of Dark Side of the Moon. Will be bringing you into the bedrooms and living rooms of your favorite artists to find out how they're coping with lockdown and how it's impacting the way they make music, and to help us out. We've been listed a new Quarantine correspondent, Jordan Rontalk. Jordan's served as a music editor at People Magazine and

VH one dot Com. He's contributed to Rolling Stone and Entertainment Weekly, and he is also the host of the I Heart Radio podcast Rivals Music's Greatest Feuds, available wherever you listen to your favorite shows. First up on Inside the Studio The Home Edition, Ash who just put out a new remix of her breakout song Moral of the Story, and it features a guest I had on Inside the Studio a few months ago, Nile Horde. It's excellent and

so is this episode of the Inside the Studio home edition. Well, hello, everybody, my name is Jordan run Talk, but enough about me. I'm here with an incredible singer, songwriter, musician, performer. You may know her as the voice behind Moral of the Story, Ok, that song that made everyone cry in the Netflix film To All the Boys, p S. I Still Love You. She's also collaborated with Sean Frank, Lewis, The Child, and so many more. I'm so thrilled to welcome Ash. How

are you today? Thank you so much for taking the time. Hi, thank you so much for having me. I'm doing really good. How are you doing? I'm good, I'm good. I got so many things I want to ask you, but I guess first and foremost Quarantine. It's been tough for everybody. You know. What's been keeping you grounded and feeling good the last couple of months. Oh man, you know, Quarantine has been just the weirdest time. This has just been a really strange year. I'll tell you that much. You know,

I feel really privileged during this time. I'm I'm safe, I'm happy, I'm healthy. I'm in the best healthiest relationship I've ever been in my life. And we're just like supporting each other, and you know, we work, we both work from home, and like, man, the fact that we haven't killed each other yet, it's like just so good.

And I live in West Hollywood, California, and it's just I'm looking at the window right now and it's absolutely beautiful and I just I feel really lucky, you know, um in all of this so ordinarily, do you feel like you're more of a homebody. Do you take your writing inspiration from like looking outward or more looking in Oh, definitely looking inward, because you I mean, I think you you take your life experience on the outside and then you internalize it and you have to kind of dig

in there and go inward. And yeah, I'm kind of an old lady. I like my I like being home. I'm dead. I love you know, Touring is one of my favorite things to do in this world. But if I have to choose between my own bed or a hotel, I'll choose my own cozy. I mean, it's yeah, it's just cozy here. Has working from home full time change the way that you've approached writing music at all or is it pretty much the same? Oh? I think a bit and that, you know, I can't just drive over

to my producer's place and track some vocals. It's um. I've had a lot of new sessions since Moral of the Story. I've had the honor of working with you know, some really like just the top dogs in the music industry and like people on my I should not be allowed to write a song with you. You are too talented. And I've met those people and talk to those people over you know, zoom, So that's been a little weird, but for them, I'm definitely a much more in person gal.

But it's it's changed the landscape of it. But for the most part, we're making it work. Everyone's you know, doing the best with what they've got. What are you working on now that you're really excited about? Can you say? Um, yeah, there's there's so much coming. Oh, I wish I could tell you everything right now. I just got a master back of the next thing we're going to release, and it is going people are going to lose their minds. I'm going to lose my mind. Um. So yeah, I've

been working on that thing. I can't say I want to say, but hopefully soon I can. Oh, I can't wait. What is your homework situation, like just like your whole setup, I'm kind of a tech narrative to um, Well, behind me right now, I'm recording a moral of the story, like I have to do um like a live video, and so behind me is like a shore sm for fifty something or other I don't even know. Um and my nord and um opus, my boyfriend just walking in. Um,

he's in a meeting. This is working from home and quarantine. Yeah, do you have to do like setting the ground rules? Like Okay, I got a radio thing like please don't flush the toilet between this time and this time, like all that stuff. Luckily the toilet is far enough away where he can flush it fine. But usually he's working, Like back there is like his little desk station, and so usually he's like right there while I'm doing interviews. Um, but we're we I think we respect each other at

so we've made it. We've made it work. But yeah, what does a typical writing day look like for you? Because and I'm sure you get this question a lot from people like me who love music but just can't, for the life of them figure out how you write it. Do you hear a song in your head? And then go to the piano and kind of flesh it out and find it. Or do you go to the piano every morning almost like exercise and lay down chord structures and just kind of find your way along and experiment

and see what happens. Oh, I mean, I think it's different every time. I I typically go sit down at the piano. Um. First, that's sort of my home. Um, It's like it's like eating a burrito. It's like just comfort, you know. So I'm definitely the most um confident and feel like most myself when I'm just sitting out at the piano and I'll work through some chords and um, digging back into you know that old pet Sounds album

by the Beach Boys. I I'm reimagining chord structure and and it's open up like an entirely new songwriting landscape for me. And so that's been really fun. Um. But yeah, it's always different sometimes though I do wake up every morning around five am and I journal and um, usually I can pull sometimes a song will start from there. You know. It just happens in a lot of different ways. That was kind of my next question to at what

point do you start thinking of the audience. When you're writing lyrics, are you writing from a place of I just want to get something out of me? Are you always sort of thinking about, here's this thing I want to convey to these people, and I want them to understand it. Most of the time, because I've pre my headline tour, I didn't. I was very um you know, when I sat down to write a song or was in a songwriting session, it was very me focused. It was like, Okay, what exactly do I need to say

right here? And then I went on tour and then people when people start screaming your lyrics back at you, you start thinking. When you sit down to write a song and imagine going on another tour and hearing people sing it back to you, it makes you think in

a completely different way. Um. So I've definitely taken that into consideration and finding that balance between making sure people are going to be able to understand you and relate and you know, actually, sometimes if you get way, way, way too specific, you're like, people are like, I don't know what you're talking about, you know. But what I've found is if you are really honest and vulnerable, usually even if you know some middle schoolers line favorite line

is talking with my lawyer. You know, I'm talking about my divorce attorney in more of the story. And you know, that's bonkers to me that that would be their favorite line. But I think there it's human beings are so you can just take take what take a lyric and then put your self in that situation or replace lawyer with you know, father or brother or mom or whatever. So um, best friend. Yeah, so wow, that was long winded. I'm sorry. The moral of the story. It's just such an incredibly

vulnerable song. Having a hit song must be crazy for a million different reasons that I can't even imagine. But having a hit song that's come from such a personal place for you, what is that like? Is it like nerve? Is it almost just like having millions of people read your diary? Like? How does that feel knowing that this song that came from such a I imagine, very painful event, um is now just so public And so, you know, like you said, just sort of everyone knows and can

now relate to do I have a hit song? I feel like you're that that's so crazy. I feel like you're the first person who's like, what's it like to have a hit song and not being like this is going to be a hit or this is about to be a hit, but being like it's a hit, well that's crazy. Oh my gosh. Um, I have to process

that a little bit. Um, what's it like? It's crazy? Um, I'm putting a song that is about my life and a very deep and dark part of my um experience as a human being that is not, you know, unique to me. So many people have gone through heartbreak and divorce it that matter. But um, it feels really cool it It was never going to be any other song than this one that had this moment, you know. And it makes me think too of you know, getting out of your relationship ship that is sort of run its

course incredibly incredibly hard. And I think of a lot of people, a lot of women specifically right now, who are in quarantine, who are literally not only metaphorically trapped in this relationship and now we're literally trapped in a home with this partner that they don't want to be with. What would you say to to those people are really having struggling with sort of stepping out and being an individual and getting out of this situation that's not good

for them. Oh, I mean, I definitely don't want to take this question or answer lightly because it's this is a very heavy, you know, a heavy thing, and I think at the end of the day, you have to decide what's right for for you in your your life. But I will say that if you are truly unhappy and in something toxic that you know and can imagine, your life will be better if you get out. UM, you are not stuck. And I think we convince ourselves that or we're stuck. UM. I have many a friend

who have been in abusive relationships. There's that cycle, um that you go through and and believe that it's gonna change, or you're gonna you know, fall back and love again, or she's gonna change. He's going to change. And at the end of the day, if you, um, if you make the decision, especially in quarantine, and it makes us

feel even more stuck and even more boxed in. I mean, I definitely say there's always there's always a way, UM, And it's so scary, but it's like, man, it's the bravest thing you can do, and for a minute, you're going to blow up your entire life. And I can't understand that. I was living in a house that I bought off signing my first record deal, and I no longer live in that house, and I am no longer married to that man that I bought that house with,

and I blew up my whole life. Um, and I am immeasurably more happy and a better person for it. You know, it's incredibly brave, both in life and in your music. I gotta ask you this is probably an old, tired question, but do you find it easier or harder to write when you're happy? Oh? Um, I I don't know. I will say, I'm going to say about the same. It really depends on I think a lot of the

typical answer is it's easier to write when you're sad. Um, And I will say, like, music is therapy, and writing it is so therapeutic that sometimes we need it more when we're sad um to write. But I mean, I don't know. I'm writing a lot of record I'm very happy, and I'm like, I'm writing my favorite records I've ever written. So yeah, I don't know. I saw you on Instagram teasing some of what I assume we're lyrics. Fans are

getting all excited. The other day we were cocaine playing milk and Honey cared to elaborate it all on that or oh yeah, I mean that. Um, that's a lyric off my next single. Um, and I started teasing that. Um, that's all I can really give you. But but there's a bunch of different stages to grieving, and I think we all think that it's happens in like, Okay, once you're done with denial, you move on to anger, and then once you're done with that, you know, and the

finals acceptance and when you hit acceptance, you're done. And UM, it so doesn't work like that. And I, um, I still, you know, go back and forth on old feelings. And so the next record is Moral of the Story. Is such an acceptance record, like fully in the acceptance stage of grief. Um, the next single is not I can't

wait to hear it. When one of my favorite things that's occurred this quarantine and I'm serious you UM put together a livestream concert for the fifty four anniversary of one of my all time I think it's my favorite album of all time, Pet Sounds the Beach Boys Pet Sounds. You mentioned it earlier. How did that come to pass? I loved it so much. So many great performances in that concert. Oh well, thank you for saying that. That was doing that concert and putting it on was an

absolute privilege. That was the coolest. That was one of the coolest things I've ever done. That wasn't you know my own music. Um, I'm so glad you said that it's one of your favorite albums because it's I mean, it's just Paul McCartney said something like, um, you're not musically educated until you listen to pet Sounds, so not

everyone who wants to be a musician listen. Um, yeah, I mean it was the fifty four anniversary was like not one of those years probably someone was going to do like a big banging thing, and I was like, I feel like this is an opportunity in the midst of Quarantine to honor you know, Brian Wilson and um, just the coolest, the coolest album ever made. What is about about that album that speaks to you so much?

I mean the instrumentation was so um, out of the out of the box and kind of out of this world. And I think that Brian he just took boundaries and just like lit a match and was just like there are no boundaries, but not in a way like you know, God love jazz avant garde music, but at some point, as a you know, normal average listener, it starts feeling like noise and just sounds and um, you know, no

shade on avant garde jazz if that's your thing. Um, But I think what was so cool is Brian took jazz, classical orchestral, motown, um pop wheeler, you know, rock and roll music and singer songwriter, you know, ballad stuff, and he threw it all together and and made it accessible and relatable. And I mean he made a pop album out of I can talk about this all day. So yeah, to stop there, Oh your your version of I just wasn't made for these times. It was absolutely exquisite. I

love what to read of that song. I have to say thank you. Oh yes, I mean I just um, I mean, I have two minds about it. I'm one. There's I'm very you know, there's a reason for everything kind of glass half full girl, So I'm very like, all right, I was born in this era for a reason, so I'm going to take that. But you know, I just don't feel like I belong that often in this era just because they I think this is like, I'm

gonna get crazy right now. I think this is the cool thing about moral of the story because it's the first time in my life that people are validating, you know, what I have to say and the way I want to say it. Um, And it's so powerful because in so many ways, you know me and my old lady tendencies and my turtlenecks, and you know, it's not pop It didn't feel very pop culture, or it wasn't um glorified or you know, I don't know. I just um have always felt like I never fully belonged. So I

was definitely drawn to that song. And when I sat down to learn the chords to that song, oh my gosh, I fell in love with Brian all over again. It took me like an hour long to transpose it, like to figure out the chords and then to transpose it into a key I could sing it, and then to act. Then it took me a couple of days of rehearsing it before I could do it on camera because it was just well, the bass makes no sense. The bass is like totally move and doing its own thing, right, No, exactly,

I mean, yes, yeah, it's so weird. I mean, and then he's got like these weird like just these diminished chords with these weird based notes. But it's perfect. It's a perfect record. You studied sort of similar arrangements at at Berkeley School Music and Boston doing big band and orchestra arrangements, right, how does that training show up in in the kind of work that you're doing now? I mean it kind of went dormant post college, um for a while there, um, and then working on this debut album.

It's definitely I've been bringing it back out for sure. That's going to be pretty It's very The album is very well for sure, pet sounds inspired, but um, you know Queen and Elton John Yellow Brick Road, and there's just a massive um orchestral element to the new album that I'm working on and in the singles. So yeah, it's definitely coming out now, which is really I mean, that's pretty awesome to put to use. For sure. I hear all the passion in your voice talking about your

music other people's music. Was there a moment when you knew that music was what you wanted to do with your life? You know? I am I am so passionate about me that I will like we could talk forever. But um, I never had that, like you know, people were like and then I ran out into the street and then so I almost got hit by a car, and then I was like, okay, I'm gonna be a blank. Um. You know, I don't think life. I think we make

up stories like that because it is more marketable. But I didn't, you know, maybe not maybe I don't know, um, but I it was just through a series of small which I feel like is more normal. It's a series of small choices that lead you to where you need to be in life. And you know, Berkeley was a piece of that puzzle. I didn't have it figured out. I probably would have dropped out if I had had figured it out, but I didn't. So I graduated, and then I moved to Nashville, and I still didn't know

what I wanted to do. But it was another piece towards us sitting here doing this interview right now, you know, just a little by little. Moving to San Diego was another piece. Um. Moving to l a by my first house, marrying the wrong guy was a piece. Um. So yeah, that was a long winded way to say no. There wasn't a moment that I was like, this is what I have to do with my life. It's just sort of been a a long, slow process. I think I read that when you were Berkeley you were considering not

even being a performer. You didn't want to be on stage at all. What would you say to somebody who's sort of struggling to find their own voice, who does have all this creativity and passion but sort of shying away from it. I would say, stop wasting time being insecure, because the world has enough insecurity and enough people who are doubting themselves daily, and I think the world just needs a lot more of people who are confident and

know who they are. And um, that takes a long time and a process, Like I was just saying, but um,

I really believe that. You know, for me in college, me not thinking I was good enough to be an artist, and that I could only be a writer that came out of insecurity and immaturity and imagine the world we're moral of the story didn't exist, and if I didn't rise to the occasion and just go no, stopp being immature, stopping in secure, get old, get over yourself, and pursue what you love, you know, and imagine what kind of impact you can have. I don't know, encouraging just I

would encourage people. The world needs your voice, you know, not to go back to you know. Another one of those. Was there a moment? But was there a moment when you knew that the song was taking off? Was there like an oh my god moment like this is this is getting crazy? Oh yeah, there was a moment for sure. Um, when the day we hit two million streams in one day and ill the day we hit one million streams, I was like, whoa, this is insane. But then when I when I got up to two, I was like,

all right, this is this is different. And then I think the next thing was when I heard it on radio. I was pretty baffled. I was like, this is this is my life on air? Weird. It's so funny because I was listening to well the story and then I was listening to pet Sounds because you inspired me with the with the live stream, and I was almost thinking that more of the story is sort of like the sequel to wouldn't it be nice? Because wouldn't it be nice?

As you know your kid, you're thinking about how great life is going to be when you're older, and then more of the story is kind of like, Okay, it was kind of scarier than I thought. It got a little weirder than I thought. But you know what, I'm still just as hopeful. I'm still looking forward, I'm still excited, and I play those back to back earlier, and it was it was cool to think that was sort of that's what it did to me at least. WHOA, that's

so cool. I would have never thought to play my music after listening to pet Sounds at all, because that's a scary comparison. Um, but that's so, that's so cool. I'm glad that. I'm glad that you made that connection, um and died. Definitely, I definitely can see how you would feel that way of that. What's next for you? What's your sort of big professional dream on the horizon. You know, I've been working on this daily when I

wake up in my journal, trying to figure it out. Um, you know, because there's benchmarks you want to hit, like, imagine having your song on the radio, Imagine getting a million streams on a song. Imagine you know, having a top twenty record, you know, on radio and then you slowly start hitting these benchmarks and you go, well, what the heck, what is my life going to be? What do I pick next? If it starts feeling like the ceiling to what you can accomplish starts growing and you're like, whoa,

this is pretty cool. So I don't know what I'm working on figuring out what? You know? The next goal specifically is but really, finishing this album is the most important thing. Obviously, promoting world story and getting as many you know, ears and eyes on it as possible is really cool. But um, really making this album as honest and true to who I am is possible, and then seeing seeing it what it does and hoping people fall in love with it the way they fell in love

with you know, more of the story. What's the first thing you want to do when quarantine is over and you can do whatever it is you want to do. The not philosophical answer is go get some sushi. One. I just want to go on a nice date with my boyfriend in order of SUPPORTO and have some sushi or something. Go to Sugarfish for me. Yeah, okay, no problem. Will you come out here and then get out of Boston and I'll take you to Sugarfish. Yeah, that is

the non philosophical. The philosophical would be, you know, get ready for I mean tour. I'm gonna I want more of the story to reach as many people as possible, you know. And so if quarantine wasn't happening, we would probably be in per Sin right now, and that would have been so much more special. This is a good second, you know option. But um, the second the door opens, I think I'm going to be on the road for a minute. Well, so my my last question, what's the

moral of your story? What do you want fans to take from your music? That's okay, hold on, this is a good question. Mm hmmm. The best thing I could say is to trust, trust that what you need to say is what people need to hear, and that you have a story, um that is worth telling. Um. And I think people, especially right now and this crazy time we're living in, want to feel um or they do feel helpless, or they feel silenced, and um, you know, we need we need your voice, and we need your

honesty and your vulnerability. It's it's so scary to speak up. And so yeah, I'd say the moral story is to use your voice and tell your story and then maybe your song will play on the radio. Who knows. Yeah? Perfect. Thank you so much, it's been such a pleasure speaking to you. It's been so lovely. Thank you for chatting. We hope you enjoyed this episode of Inside the Studio

Home Edition, a production of I Heart Radio. For more episodes of Inside the Studio and other shows from I heart Radio, check out the i heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.