[ISBW] Conquering Creative Bully #1: BART (a potato)

>> Mur Lafferty: This is I Should be writing season 21, episode 7. I should be Writing, I Should Be working on my craft I should be writing, I should be submitting my next draft But I'm sitting home watching the doctor who. But. Hi there. Welcome to I Should Be Writing. This is a podcast and live stream for wannabe writers, and I'm your host, Mur Lafferty I've got, like, eight books written. I've been podcasting for 21,

20 and a half years. And, yeah, I've been doing the things, the making of the contents. I'm a little out of it today because I'm not in good practice of streaming right now. And, well, moving through this week has been kind of like pushing against a membrane. Like, I can almost reach what I'm going for, but not quite. so I've been working on my new novel, which was announced. If you're on the Patreon, or substack mailing lists, you will have heard about that. But I do have a cozy

fantasy coming out in the summer, which I'd already been. No, sorry, not Last Midsolar Murders comes out in July. The book, my book is due in October and it may be 26 or 27 till it comes out. But it's a cozy fantasy and it's supposed to be fun. I'm having fun with it. I do want to talk a little bit about outlining a little bit later, but, I've been working on either the words or the outline. Some index cards this week. I've been, I don't like doing

digital notes. I can only think clearly when I'm making just wretched and terrible notes after notes after notes. And sometimes I lose them because I have many, many notebooks. But that's how my brain decides to start thinking, which is in scribbling down in notes. My handwriting is terrible, but I do have some very nice pens, so I try to let that balance out. I just covered up my show notes. So, a little bit of news. Escape Pod is nominated for the Hugo again for Best Semi Pro

Zine. And we are delighted. Valerie's in the chat and, yeah, I'm just thrilled we've got a team that works very, very hard. And I just can't believe we're. We're being nominated again. There was a new nominee, Deadlands. Dreadlands. Great knowing me to get it wrong when I'm actually recording. But there's a new semi Prozine finalist that I'm excited to check out because I Know, one of the people on the staff, the Deadlands. Thank you. So want to check that out? And

yeah, some other really good nominees. And then, you know, Ursula got two nominations. Premee got two nominations. yeah, And, and of course the in depth reporting that Jason Sanford and Chris Barkley did on the Chengdu debacle. that happened for the Hugos. I should stop talking it that because it happened at the Chengdu worldcon. But it was Americans. It was Americans who screwed all that up. So just the Hugo

debacle from two years ago. I knew that their report would be nominated for best related work and I was right. So good on them. Jason Sanford is the investigative reporter I thought I wanted to be when I was in college and I still don't want to be because I know what goes into it. Just not my thing. the 2023 Hugo debacle. Thank you, Valerie. other news is just me as a consumer. I realized, when I'm reading with my eyes, I listen to a lot of audiobooks, but when I'm reading with my eyes I

get into hyper focus mode. And strangely this has made me want to read less because I know if that book grabs me, it's going to hold on to me for a very long time. And even twice this week I finished two books. But it's like I was reading at breakfast and then I read for another hour and today I was reading at lunch and then I read for another hour. So it's like reading supposed to be good for you. And it helps me professionally because I grow as a person and as a writer. But it is a hole I have

to be prepared to fall into. But I did finish, the Teller of Small Fortunes, which is a cozy fantasy about a seer who doesn't want, doesn't want to be a mage and so she runs away and just does mild fortune telling on the road. That was pretty good. It was rough in some parts. There were things that I hoped for because they would be really cool. There were things that I expected because of how knowing how certain story beats usually go. And it was

a little rough around that. But it still kept me till the end. And I definitely recommend it if you like cozy fantasies. Found family, friends, that kind of thing. And as for tv, it's been a while since I've had a podcast out, but severance season two ended and it continues to be one of the most blind moment. wow. Maybe I should not have been streaming today. Mind blowing. It's really got to be one of the most blind. I can't say it. Oh my God. It's good. Okay. It's good. Go watch it.

If you don't have Apple tv, get a friend. Everybody should have a friend with Apple tv. This is like NK Jemisin writing the beginning of the Broken Earth series with an event that we don't know what, what exactly is happening until like midway through the third book. Because she had it all planned out so well. That's how Severance is. It's like half the things are explained, but they open up new

questions. And I don't think it's too much of a spoiler to say that you will see Mr. Milchick dance better than season one. Imagine that. Anyway, if you don't know, Severance is a sort of dystopian sci fi, but It feels like technology of the 90s kind of, but major head personality, messing with technology in the workforce. And it's. It's amazing. But also Murderbot is coming to the television. And I knew that. I knew it was. But I guess I see so many Hollywood announcements of film rights being

sold. I mean, I've sold film rights and only allowed to talk about them when the producer, says it's okay. And they usually come to nothing. It's nice, it's free money. I certainly don't put it down. But, knowing that rights have been sold and then the thing actually happening is, yeah, I just never. You don't expect to see it. You just learn not to. I mean, one of the biggest names in science fiction today is John Scalzi. Have you ever seen an old man's war

movie or TV show? No, but those rights have been tied up, I'm pretty sure for all these years. But, anyway, but Murderbot is like being made and coming out next month. I'm speaking currently in April of 2025. So it will be again, Apple TV, not sponsored, next, month. And if you are not familiar, Murderbot is a series of novellas that then became a book. Then she wrote a full novel. That's the

way it's supposed to go. Several standalone novellas. And then she wrote a full novel about a, security Android that Manages to, Delete his. His constraining programs that keeps him from going rogue. But it's not like he wants to snap and kill a lot of people. He just wants to watch TV all the time. And I, Now I'm even doing it. I'm doing it because of stupid Skarsgard. One of the things about the SEC unit is its pronouns are it. We never get it

gendered at all. And while they did keep the it pronoun in the trailer, that I saw, which I appreciate, it's still very male because it's Alexander Skarsgrd. So, that's a little disappointing, but otherwise, it looks amazing. It looks like I pictured all systems red when I read it. I just. It's amazing. It looks phenomenal. So I'm very happy for Martha Wells that that's actually coming out. if you want to read the first book and you're worried about hyper focus like

me, it's a novella. You can get through it pretty quickly, and it's just. It's just awesome. Murderbot rescued Martha's career. Somebody told me they read this cool new book by this new author named Martha Wells. I'm like, martha Wells has been around for a long time, and she thought her career was over, and so she. Then she wrote Murderbot, and her career's not over now. Valerie is correcting my pronouns in the chat. I'm sorry, non. Uh, binary. People come in all shapes and

sizes, but people have their imagined versions. Yes. Skarsgard's Guard's voice kind of works for me. It's not super deep or masculine. True. It's very clipped. It's. It's, you know, it's. It's. Stop looking at me. And, you know, when they find out that he's been. It's been watching the television, all the shows, they're like. They, It's like, that's private. And, my favorite part that I really hope they go into is because Murderbot watches all these shows.

They've cast at least one of them, so we get to see what Murderbot's watching while Murderbot is just standing around waiting for scientists to do their science thing. And it's a fully cast with people you will recognize, science fiction, drama. And it's. That was the best part of the trailer for me, is seeing that little clip the show within the show, excited that they kept the inner monologues

yes, yes. So, been talking about that for a long time, but still, there's some frighteningly good science fiction TV going on right now. And it's not like super depressing. It's nice. I mean, you could say that severance is depressing, but for me, it's just more of. It stimulates my head so much. I'm just like, more. I want more stories. Bring on the more stories Honestly, the thing that most annoyed me about the Murderbot casting is Murderbot being white, because I did not see it

as white. That is also very true. They did get a very diverse cast of scientists, but Murderbot is a, is played by a white male, But anyway, what I've been wanting to talk about, and it, and it dovetails with the fact that I said I worked on an outline for my book, is I'm going to be doing several episodes about the bullies I've been thinking a lot about. Some people call it the inner

editor, but it doesn't feel like an editor. It feels like a bully. Because I've only had one editor be actually rude to me. And then I heard he smoked weed while he edited. So that's not an excuse, but it's a, reason. Okay, but the jerk inside my head, all of them, they don't, they, they, they don't hold back. And I've. I've identified six and so I'm going to be talking about them because I know that they, affect you guys too. At least some of them do. Maybe not

all six. the first one is, the only one with a real name because it was my first inner Editor critic bully concept, which is Bart. And Bart is a potato. just imagine a poorly drawn potato. Not poorly drawn potato. My kid did when I did first imagined Bart. Bart was a poorly drawn potato, but with like angry eyes and downturned mouth and like little stick arms waving and basically just Bart is the one who tells me that, what I do doesn't matter. What I write is not going to resonate with

anyone. And if I did have a success, in the past, I'll never get it again. That's a fluke Bart, does a lot of lies, does a lot of insults. Usually when I forget something or I drop something or I do something that is not careful, I do something due to the ADHD mindset really in my head, I start feeling, you know, that, God, you're an idiot. You're so stupid. Why'd you let yourself do that? That's not

me. That's Bart. That's Bart telling me that it's all pointless and I am stupid for wanting to achieve these things. Bart's good at pivoting because if you try to actually argue with Bart, Bart will just insult you on something else. Which is where you learn that these insults are not based in reality. Because if they were, you could argue against

them, but they're not. So when Bart realizes that maybe one day I've got a good esteem, I've got a good self confidence that way, and I'm like, my brain is wired in a weird way, and sometimes I forget things. I'm not stupid. Bart will be like, well, let's talk about your book then, because that certainly is stupid. Bart pivots fast. And Bart is loud. It's just so loud. Very much in my head. Very loud. Little ugly potato on my shoulder. Just meh, meh, meh, Just chattering away, Hate

it. but what you can do with Bart, for me, are two things. And granted, both of them involve a little bit of actual physical activity to deal with something that is a concept and may make people feel silly. And if you don't like to do it, then you do you. But, I've had more than one. I've talked to two different, creativity content creator coaches, who've talked about the inner editor and what to do about it. And a lot of it is draw a picture

of it, wad it up, and throw it away. I like to put Bart in a box. So I get the picture and I put it in a box. And so Bart's not dead. He'll never be dead. And he will. You can sometimes hearing hear him in the box. But then it's just like. And it's funny. and one really weird thing that I've done that sometimes works is just say, look, whether it's good or not, or whether I've messed up or not, I need to write the book, I need to do the chore or

whatever. Can you back off for like an hour and you can come back and tell me whatever you need to tell me in an hour? Go get a coffee. And sometimes, allowing myself to put off insulting myself kind of works. But one way I was thinking about it was yesterday when, I worked very hard to do some character sketches and give my characters some personality traits that, will counter each other. You know, like if. On a very simple level, if you've got someone who's very neat,

there should be someone who's very. Who's very not neat, sloppy. if you've got somebody who always thinks before they speak and is very measured, you want somebody who is flying off the cuff. Ridiculous. actually, I can't remember which streaming service it was, but we just a couple of months ago, we watched the series Deadlock, which is an Australian murder mystery, which. Where it's got these two women, and one is, like, possibly one of the crudest people I've ever seen on

television. And I'm saying of any gender. She is super rude. I am pretty much numb to the C word now because she uses it a lot. And I understand it's not as bad in, Australia as it is here, but still, it's. It's like, that's very regular. And the other detective is prim, by the book, married, lesbian who just wants to do her job. It's not even a buddy cop romance or bromance or galmance or whatever. They do not work together well for several episodes. Many, many

episodes. But that is, if you want to see an extreme example of, you know, sloppy and neat or loud and boisterous and buttoned up and polite, that's. Go check out Deadloche It's, Yeah, it's a pretty amazing show. It takes place in Tasmania, actually. And the visiting detective, the really crude one, is, from, uh, Darwin. So she does not understand that the climate's different from northern Australia to

Tasmania. So I was making those things on my index cards and, and trying to look at What characters will counter other characters and what they need to do to make good interpersonal conflict. but after I did That I did the Save the cat beat sheet, and I tried to write out what's going to happen at every important beat of the story. And when I was done, I looked and it felt so sterile and

boring. If you want to know One thing that Bart yells at me about is I feel like my characters are not as fleshed out as they could be. That is, I know my description is not my strong suit, but I also feel weak in the character department. And so I feel like I need these tools. I need help to try to sketch out who they are before I write. But then it's really hard for me to take that and make it into a character. I don't know why. And it's that I really am a, seat of the pants writer.

Because half the awesome stuff that happens in my books, or more than half probably, happen because I'm writing, and I get the idea as I'm writing, which is bad for, like, communicating with an editor. Really. It's not good. But yeah, I. I was thinking about my terrible sterile outline yesterday, and I'm like, oh, wait a minute. That's the bully talking. Of course the outline is going to be bare bones because it's an

outline. I think knowing that I'm going to deviate from the outline is one thing that helps allowing myself that freedom. Because while I am pretty sure what happens at different spots, the connective tissue is just not there. And a lot of the, inciting incidents to something are not there. And here's your fun author topic of the day or fun fact of the day. If someone asks a question in a book and your character says, I don't know, it usually means you don't know, and you should probably look

at something else. Write on another chapter. Take a walk, take a break. I had to realize that, whenever something happened and my character's like, oh, I don't know, I wonder what that is either. And I'm just like, oh, wait a minute. I don't know. It doesn't get exciting for me when I say, oh, this is the scene where we talk about X, so. But I'll get over it. Because you have to, because that's the job

We've been talking about the bully. That, that says very, very many insults in your head when you're trying to write. And I think the bully loves Pantsers because it can insult your outline. Any outline you. You struggle to write will be insulted horrifically by the bully. But, yeah, you can just tell it to maybe go away for a couple of minutes, put it in a box, draw it and tear it up. You need to find a tool that

works for you. the Snowflake method made me want to throw my Kindle across the room because it's repetitive and some people need that. It's a very bare bones concept of the Snowflake Method is you've got. Okay, you've got this person, and this person is friendly, and the person who's friendly has a green shirt, and the person who's friendly with the green shirt lives in Cincinnati. And you just take all of the details you've made already and you

write them out and then you add something new. So your, your concept becomes a sentence and your sentence becomes a paragraph, and your paragraph becomes two paragraphs. But you're always writing the same thing, just in more words. And I got so frustrated, I just did. not for me. thank you for listening to I Should Be Writing the longest running writing podcast in existence. This episode was made possible by the Fabulous, who support the podcast via Patreon or

Substack. Join the fabulous at patreon.com mightymurr or mightymurr.substack.com Theme music provided by John Anelio, art provided by Numbers Ninja, and podcast hosting provided by Libsyn. This episode is released under Creative Commons Attribution Non commercial No Derivatives 4.0 license. You can find all of my books and podcasts at murverse.com sitting home watching Doctor.