Once in a blue moon

Hello and welcome to the I'll Ask My Sister podcast, the advice podcast where the cosmic meets the corporate. I am Ellen Hooper, an executive coach, and I'm joined by Mads Williams, a human design coach, also my sister. Hello, hello. Hello, how you doing? good, good, good, mostly good. we started today quite grounded and then we had to like ramp up back into some introduction energy. What we call jazz hands energy Jazzhound introduction. I Okay. So. Okay. Okay.

Have you had a cosmic week or a corporate week? I was actually thinking about this cause I was like, I don't really think I've had either cause I've had like a real human week which has been so nice. So one of our best friends is visiting from home and in the same week she's come we've had the coldest, wettest, Winter. No, it's not even winter. It's summer, but it feels like winter. And, she arrived on Sunday.

It's now like towards the end of, she's been here about a week and like, we're at high twenties, the sun's out, like we've been swimming and yeah, I just feel like we've all kind of abandoned life a bit this week and been on like summer school holidays with her. which has been amazing.

And. I have a spiritual coach who talks about like when your business is an extension of you, it's like less about thinking of it as a wage and more about like flow and momentum and energy and you know she'll often say that like some weeks, You will be completely at capacity because you have the energy for it. And then there'll be other weeks where you think, where are all my clients?

And then, you know, you'll get your period or your friend will arrive and the sun will be out and you'll be so grateful that you have the space. So, , I started my program this week, so I, it was like dotted with beautiful humans, but there was, yeah, capacity to like go and lay like sardines in the sun. So like, that's just been very cool. So I guess, I guess it's been cosmic. And like full disclosure, I haven't really slept because, , we're about to have a really intense moon.

So by the time you listen to this, you can look back. It will have been on the 21st on Sunday, which is actually my sister's birthday, which we can talk about if you want. it's been like, by the time you've listened to this, it will have been a really cool moon because it's literally like the same, like once in a blue moon. So the reason for that is having two full moons. in a row that are the same zodiac sign. It's really rare. So we've had two full moons in a month?

Yes. No, you're totally right. Cause normally you have one new moon, one full moon. and But I have been wrong a lot and I'm not used to you being right when I think I'm right. So thank you blue moon. I know you were wrong before we press record as well today. So I'll just enjoy that. Yes. Okay. Thank you. So it's two full moons in a month and they're both the same. Sign, which is exciting because it's like more good material in Capricorn.

But anyway, my point is, If you had sleep issues over last weekend, or things were coming up, or your things were feeling heightened, like that once in a blue moon energy is worth investigating, but also being gentle on yourself. But yeah, let's see what comes out of this mouth today. Have you had a cosmic or corporate week? I have had a gastro week. Oh, that's right. I forgot. Do you think that's, uh, moon related? Um, let's see. Did it feel related to your public and career Did it?

Any lessons or things you needed to Who the fuck knows? Well, I did, I rested. that was good. And then I ran two workshops this week. And then of course I, my son also had gastro and then I had to cancel everything else does it feel related to my career and public profile? It's we talked recently on the phone about a business coach that you had listened to a podcast about and I can't remember what Can you help me? It was like, what's your kind of main driver?

I don't remember what modality or methodology it was. think it's maybe something he's developed, but he was talking about it as an energetic element and the examples that I gave were things like self expression or power. Yes. And we talked about, like, one of my main drivers for work right now is flexibility or autonomy. but that's a life stage thing. That's not what kind of makes me truly happy.

You know, there have been times in my life where I have been pretty happy working like 60 hours a week because I love working. so yes, I guess the gastro feels a bit related to career in that I'm still trying to design a career that the inevitability of someone getting gastro happens and like, it doesn't cause stress ripples. And. we got through three episodes of vomiting in three weeks without stress ripples, but the fourth one, that fucking killed me. The fourth one got me. fair.

I think that's like, no, we really need to push your buttons because you weren't looking at what we needed you to look at before. But, but sure. well you just asked me to pull out my Louise Hay You Can Heal Your Life, so I don't believe that, but. Go on, tell I, cause I've got a different question for you. So just come on, tell us what Louise Hay says gastro and just, you know, for our corporate listeners, who is Louise Hay? What's the deal?

so Louise Hay. I believed that she was diagnosed with a terminal illness, but I don't know on what decade. And she essentially cured herself through, affirmations and changing her limiting beliefs. And she has this like insane book. But You actually can't overthink it. It makes no sense that some people channel what they channel through. You can if you're cynical and logical and like want to tear apart the fun stuff in life. Or you can come on the journey with me.

but not in the like, Belle Gibson kind of way, you know, I just want to stress that. that's thank you. What a great disclaimer and caveat. Gosh, are we not going to change that to caveat? So should I look at viral infections Oh, actual gastro? maybe viral infections. I did, I did a lot of sleeping. So, vomiting, first, is a violent rejection of ideas. Fear of the new. And the affirmation, pardon? said fuck off, Louise. So We hate you but we love you. Yes, sorry.

If you're listening, we consult you like the moon cards. She has passed away but she says she's definitely listening. Okay, I feel stressed about that. so do you want to hear viral infections or do you want to hear the affirmation for vomiting? I digest life safely and joyously. Only good comes to me and through me. And then viral infections is lack of joy flowing through life. Bitterness. excellent. lovingly allow joy to flow freely in my life. I love me.

She does talk about those starting the day by looking in the mirror and telling yourself you love yourself and I've adopted it and it's really nice. Laughs. that sounds theoretically lovely. her dialogue around it is if things come up or you find it hard to say or like the tension, like that's all information, right? So even that is just like really cool to be like, why am I having trouble with this?

I'm always ready to be like, this is fucking stupid, but just like the Mew Mew cards, it's always like, interesting as well because for me I'm like that's just that that's that south node Virgo that's like why are we judging before we try and try it but I will say that I did that yesterday we went swimming at the reservoir which I've been putting off for two and a half years because I didn't know how to do it because you have to wear like a swimming cap and a floaty and everything

around water in this city is so organized and it makes me so infuriated and then I went swimming with my good friend who's a projector. So she obviously like understand why systems work the way they do. And we're like halfway through the smallest course, cause we just did a straight line back and forth while everyone else did 400 meters. And we're resting on our floating device. Cause you're not allowed to go on your back and do backstroke. Cause then they'll think you're. drowning.

And she was like, you know what Mance, there's no salt in here. So by the time we do a couple of laps, you're actually going to be so relieved. You've got this big, weird pillow attached to your body. because otherwise you're just in a really deep body of water with like nothing supporting you. I was like, God, she's so right. And I was so grateful. And, I don't even know why I'm telling you this. Oh, cause the resistance was so strong.

And then by the end, I was like, Oh, this is the most magical thing ever. And I can even handle a swimming cap. So it is good just to get over yourself sometimes, isn't it? And I, and I wanted to tell that to you because I thought based on the conversation last week about me not wanting to do certain things, maybe sometimes you'll just have to say like, it's like a, it's like a, It's the floaty. Put the floaty on and suck it up and get out here in the water. there's no salt water here.

And it is funny because one of our podcast reviews is this podcast is like if Louise Hay and Richard Branson had a baby. do you have a question for your sister? Yeah, I do. I am now a published author. yeah. is a lifelong dream of mine. Although, actually the first time I was published, um, was because one of my short stories won a competition when I was 16 years old. And I still, I showed my four year old that book the other day. And she was like, whatever.

You should show, my nephew, he'll love it. My son. Yeah, I was like, I don't want to say your 7 year old, it just feels so weird. I've never had to call him my nephew either. so I have a chapter in an anthology book, which is really exciting. And I finally got the hard copy. So I have these four boxes of these books now. what should I do with them? What do you feel drawn to doing with Oh, I don't know, I just feel, I think this happens to me a lot.

It's like by the time the thing, the milestone actually rises, like I feel exhausted having gotten here. Yeah. And I often miss chance to celebrate things. Mmm, that's a really valid takeaway. Maybe we sit in the celebration. Maybe you should have a little, like, party and everyone comes over and the books are out. But like who? ha ha friends! ha ha. Yeah, maybe. we grew up with mum's, like, different groups of friends coming through the house, like, nearly every day of the week.

Yeah. Whether she was selling clothes or like, I don't know, It's like the not selling to your friends. Do you, like, But that's the intention you get to set, right? Can't this just be the celebration rather than the achievement or the price tag we're putting on it? And I think that's a big part of the reframe for you right now. Like you've spent your whole life having to get the A, like, can't this just be the thing?

Like you, you just said it's been your lifelong dream and you're holding it in your hand. Do you want to share that with your loved ones? Yeah, it's interesting. It's like, I feel like no one else does that. I don't know. It feels kind of indulgent to be like, Oh, and look at this thing. My life is indulgence. Yeah. Oh, we're annoying? I don't know.

it's more coming into my head rather than it being about spotlight the, the infamous tale of you getting like, I don't know, 98 percent and dad asking what happened to the other two. Yes, it probably is like, oh, it's not big enough. Like it's not a whole book. It's not my book. It's not, with a major publisher. Yeah, it's so interesting. Because I, I feel like you can, fall for that trap as well with the podcast. We're not there yet, we're not this, we're Yeah. My ears feel hot fun!

Uh, interesting. Want me to check what Louise Hay says about ears? go on. It's something about not liking what you're hearing. Oh, From memory. right. Yeah. We don't need to look. I'll tell you later.

do you know, I felt more drawn to rather than celebrating with friends, felt more drawn to do something that was kind of more connected to the content, like the chapter is called the after and happily ever after, and it talks about, well, really my husband's and my journey of equal parenting and the, uh, the rollercoaster of that.

So yeah, maybe I felt drawn to doing something around that for people who are interested in that, rather than, my poor friends who I make come to like every pub, choir, and disco club, and like club Well, I was going to say, I really love that because if there's momentum behind that, that's awesome. But I would just tiny, tiny, tiny, tiny, tiny check that's not still coming from the same wound of like, it has to be attached to a reason or a work thing or an achievement just check.

But if it's coming from a pure place, because that's what gets your boat going, then that's awesome. But like, it is also okay to just celebrate. Your lifelong dream, which is what you just said, which is really massive. So take a beat to do that. Yeah, okay. Thank you. Mm hmm. It's the peer pressuring we all know and love. And if listeners have any ideas, please send them through and I'll tell you if my ears feel hot or not. All right. Do you have a question for me? Yes, I do.

So I've been forming a long list of questions for you. And then based on your question for me, I decide which one I want to rally off. You have also started texting me. Don't forget a question for me, which has been really helpful. Thank you. You can change people. You can change. speaking of different like modalities or ways of looking at the world. There's this one modality called the Sphinx Code and they talk a lot about it's very cool. Actually, you know how we spend so much time.

Casting our judgement and conditions onto our parents. You know, like, in therapy because of you guys. But this kind of modality talks about the fact that actually we conditioned our parents to treat us a particular way because we needed them to be those people for our soul journey. Oh, even if it's just a hypothetical exercise, like, if I needed this, if I wanted this somewhere weirdly, like, cosmically, what am I learning? What can I take from it? Like, what's my hero's journey?

How can I rise up? take it that if it helps, but leave it if it doesn't. But, it is really fascinating then because you look at siblings who have the same parents, but of course have a completely different dynamic. And then you get to go, Hmm, why? Why, why, why, why did I need that? So my question for you is somewhere in there around, how do you think we conditioned our parents to treat us differently and why for our soul journeys? It's interesting working on this together.

and it's also interesting how much you've kind of stepped into your own business and your own way of living and That it's doing what you want it to. Cause I, I was reflecting on the way here. Like I am used to being right. I am used to being like, no, it's caveat. And you're like, no, it's not. And I'm like, I'm right. So. who's got the law degree? that's a really hard question. I'm, I may need years to reflect on that.

Mmm. Do you have anything that you wanted to share, which was, would be typical of Um, me a question and you so I can answer. something., No, I think that I was like more curious about what you saw, but I don't know, it's really funny. Like, the juxtaposition between really stepping into being an adult and then also owning that I have often had the dynamic of youngest child that doesn't mind, like, accepting the love and support.

And I think I blocked that for a long time because it felt wrong or like I hadn't achieved or made it. And that kind of actually just blocked things in a lot of different ways. I have this, meant to graduate from. yeah, exactly. But actually leaning into it has meant my relationships have strengthened so much more with like, I'm specifically thinking of mom and dad.

one of my practitioners I saw the other day and, and she said, Oh, you know, when you came back from Perth, I thought of course she's going to move back to Australia. Which I don't know if I will, but I just thought that was an interesting comment. And so I pressed her on it and she's like, yeah, because you're so close with your family. And sometimes like you need an outsider to like say that to go, oh yeah, I really am.

And that's the gift of not rejecting that, like they are a big part of my soul journey. And I couldn't be doing what I'm doing without their literal financial support, their literal love, they're like championing of it. And so it's been a good lesson in like, what is trying to come to you for anybody that we say, but I didn't want it to come that way.

Because actually, again, if you remove the like, judgment we've ascribed to it, it is all still, pouring lots and lots of love into like, into your people. So, I don't know what that means for you. But I feel like they are my parents to help me with this journey, and I'm grateful for it. You're like, I fucking hate my parents. Just joking, I'm kidding. Jeez. just so funny. It's like, I've had a completely different upbringing. you have.

Yes. And just feel like my interactions with our parents are like, way more, stable. Yeah. Or linear or something like there's not as many highs and lows Especially as like kids as little kids so there is this like video of you and I, where you are probably 8 or 9, which makes me 5 to 6. And Our grandparents are sitting there, our Anglo Indian grandparents. So the ethnic aspect is important here, I think, versus the high judgment grandparents.

Yeah. And you are playing like perfect piano and our grandparents are asking about your practice. They're asking mum and dad. So like, how often does she see her tutor? Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. You're having this entire dialogue about your talent. Around you instead of to you, you can hear. And then I slide across the camera. I give mom a wink. I pick up her wine and I, I gesture to like, can I have a sip? And she obviously says yes. It was a different time.

Okay. And I also don't drink anymore, so it obviously worked. I have a sip and then I slide out and I was just like free to like entertain myself in. that space where you were the perfect child. And it's kind of like, what about this book? Like, when do you just get to have the sip of wine and dance out of frame and like let your hair down? And it broke my heart for your little self because you've been so perfect your whole life.

And instead of everyone sitting there and being like, Ellen, you're amazing. everyone was dissecting the performance. Because we didn't know how to like celebrate that. Whereas I was so naughty. So I was celebrated I didn't yell. You were known for having the best, red wine palate of the pre tween, pre teen. Mom thought I was going to be a sommelier. I mean, like, that's all kind of true, but like, , what am I meant to do with that?

I think it's just worth now, instead of being in default, go interesting. Why did I need to be conditioned that way for my soul journey? Am I needing to, like, break it, or embrace it, or talk to them about it, or, yeah. Just the why question. Yeah, I guess I don't think about things in terms of my soul journey. Um, that's all I think about. Feels Cool. Alright, Shall we hear from our sponsor Let's do it!

So we were going to do a once in a blue moon episode where we actually answer two listener questions. Have you still got time for that? All right. Amazing. Well, let's begin with the one that comes first on my list. If it is part of my design to bring out the good in others, why am I jealous of the person I helped? So for a little bit of context, this person has the gift that like, actually amplifies things in people.

So when they're working together, you know, they might be able to, like, spot what their talents are and therefore, like, help. Just by like, being around them, you know, they'll kind of have this like, really positive impact. But what this listener is describing is, like, this person has come to them for assistance.

They've, like, put a spotlight on it or amplified it, and then they've gone out, like, on their journey, in their alignment, and I guess the listener's left feeling the kind of toxicity of envy. So I think it's interesting when someone comes to you for help. Because it implies that whatever you're helping with is obviously something that you're quite capable in. And. I would expect that jealousy means that that's where you should be using your gifts.

, which I think that's one of the only times when I can sometimes feel regret for helping. If it's like, oh actually like that's where I wanted to be, or that's what I wanted to do. It's not that I regret the helping itself, Usually there's some sort of, I haven't been honest about what I want. Rather than it being dipping into, you know, the negative expression of a regret or like that reflection of the experience, like, what if you could actually look at it as feedback?

So, as Ellen said, they've come to me because I'm really good at this. So, like, this could be something really being channeled into my services or my role that I'm currently in or whatever, however I show up. And actually, like, more clues of, like, what to tap into and where to go. But it did remind me of, I have like this big energy in my chart that's about helping launch people or projects. It's like a momentum builder.

And I used to work at Aesop and I was like, kind of doing my current job. with the team, you know, like deep conversation, kind of slipping into coaching. I was already learning about human design. And so I would have these like really amazing, , engaging relationships and we'd be workshopping and like getting people towards like their dreams and then they'd leave. And I'd be like, why am I stuck here? And it was cause I was using my skill to launch them.

But not seeing it as a mirror, not turning it back on myself, like, Oh, I can then use this for myself, or I can use this to be of service in a greater capacity than working on a shop floor. So, embracing it As your superpower and knowing like, it's come up to point you in the right direction because we wouldn't have a charge or the envy if everything was working. So that kind of reframing of it being like a big signpost like, come this way. Okay. Moving along. To our second full moon.

The question is, I'd like to hear what or where you think the power can be in the concept of surrendering in any area of life, work, relationships, et cetera. What does it look like to surrender? I think that it's so hard to find. And with the exception of giving birth, I don't think I've ever really done it. But in birth, yes. Yeah, because I was induced with my first kid and yeah, I did have this experience of just being like, totally in it. Like I couldn't talk to anyone.

During my birth, and my husband and I always laugh cause I was induced, you know, you get a little, IV drip. And so there's like a little trolley with the IV drip. And some people are like, oh, it's really annoying cause you have to turn the trolley around. I just was like so in my own world and I just was like charging around the room and my husband's just like following me with the IV drip like moving it around.

I actually feel heart palpitations like thinking about surrendering and I think it's because of the attachment to control. it's a very, specific trust in the people around you or the universe that's, quite hard to like really sink into. we're literally apples and oranges here because I find the concept really nourishing and beautiful.

And so therefore like a lot of power in it, but But I think the difference between when you actually feel like you're in a surrendered flow and when you feel like nothing's working or you've like given up or that like spiritual bypassing is when you haven't used the challenges or experiences in your life to like clean up your act or clean up your psyche or your relationships or you know like being surrendered doesn't mean life is dead. easy or completely free flowing with no challenges.

It means that you're in trust because you believe at this point in time you've done all you can to therefore receive what like it's trying to come through to you. And that doesn't mean like you've done all you can, you know, like overachieving, like I'm going to beat myself up. if I don't, it's more of a dance with where do I have power? free will and agency to be the best person I can be today? And where am I responding to what is literally in front of me?

that's so interesting, the relationship with receiving. And isn't it funny that some of the people who are best at giving find it so hard to receive? And I definitely particularly, you know, as I've become a parent, I've definitely had these feelings of like, is anyone ever going to take care of me in the way that I take care of other people?

my life experience of that so far has been like, mostly no. Although like, this podcast is brought to you by my mother in law looking after my children, so thank you Helen! Ha ha And that reminds me of what I was saying earlier about like, is that genuinely true, right? Which it might, be for your reality right now. But what I was saying about where are we not? open yet to actually accepting or receiving what is there.

So that thing of, I didn't want it from you, or I wanted it to look this way, or even just, like I often say, like, my heartbreak opened up my heart to, like, Received so much more love and give so much love and I actually said that yesterday. I was like, I can't wait for my next like love to be like dump all this new love I have.

Right, but like that took discomfort and pain and loneliness and nights on the floor like crying like so you can see how like being surrendered to that experience doesn't mean i didn't experience like the depth of living but it really felt like especially with like anything like water or tears it's easy to feel like it's a tide or like a wave you're riding but i just knew i couldn't close you it up anymore. So I, I wrote it.

And so that would be like, for me, I think that's very powerful and where it's led is somewhere new and exciting. And I don't know where the future is, like what the future is, but I'm like surrendered to like the hows or the whens because I mind the gold in the moment. So therefore the present moment. is more rich and exciting to be in. What do you think stops us from like receiving?

I think it is judgment obviously it's your own, but I think often it's like deciding, like we've decided or picked something up. mm Like if I need your help, I can't be good enough. I mustn't be good enough. yeah, I think so. So like, what does it mean to be a 33 year old who is like so dependent for so many things from my family. It's like, well then I failed. But actually, what I really, really want is to feel like I belong, or that they, understand me, love me, and accept me.

Like, the activity of opening up to one actually leads to the other. We sometimes trick ourselves to think the thing we want the most can't come because of the, like, belief and the story we're perpetuating.

So it's like, well, I can't receive that because if I do, I'm such a failure and they're never gonna accept me or love me or think this of me but actually it's like the thing that's like keeping that protect you know someone said to me the other day like sometimes like it isn't it is important to protect ourselves but sometimes that becomes like a force field and nothing mm And the self-fulfilling prophecy of that as well. exactly Is there anything in the chart that's interesting for surrender?

it is really interesting that projector. So their like strategy and way they manifest is to be invited. So again, it's not that you sit on your couch and wait for someone to ask you something. You still go about creating and sharing, but you don't force it on anyone. It's like, it's here when you, when you want it, when you need it. So that's like a very surrendered state to be in is like, I'm getting the clues and the nudges for like what my contribution is. So I'm going to do that.

And I'm here. when you're ready. And like in turn that's actually what creates the kind of like alignment energetically for people to be magnetized to you. Yeah, and like coming back to when you were talking about soul journey, which is not, I mean, I guess I think more of life purpose, which, when I think of my life purpose, it's like, it's very conceptual. I don't know that I could describe it to others very well. you know, in careers often like to think of it as about like a push and a pull.

I think you'll always end up with this kind of philosophical question back to this kind of idea of like, well, free will and do we have choice or are things kind of predestined and if you go with this idea of like, okay, I surrender to my soul journey and like, there's a wave that I meant to ride. just for you, for your life, how do you make the distinction between the push and the pull? when you feel like you're kind of driving or taking direction versus when you feel like you're being led?

They are so linked for me between like, my body's magnetic pull towards something that feels outside of me. Like they feel very much like they're speaking to each other. , But when you were talking, I thought maybe the way to like best describe it about soul journey and like, how do you know you're on your path or, how are you in that state? I kind of think about it like if the universe is your teacher, it's giving you homework. So that what, what homework has come up today?

Like, what do we need to go and work on? You know, my jealousy peaking, I'm like, oh shit, I've got some homework. Because that is something I need to clean up. And there's something to like, look at and learn. And once I know what it is, I understand myself more and I'm like, oh, I'm a defender of my individuality. Okay, cool. I can like, be back in the driver's seat. And then I like, keep moving. And then there's like, a new lesson.

But I heard this amazing thing that was like, you can practice your free will until your destiny puts you back on your path.

And it's a little bit like that, you know, like when you get made redundant or you get broken up with, or your visa gets rejected, like we are definitely actioning stuff from a place of like desire and want, but sometimes when we haven't done the like internal work and like cleared out the vessel we're still operating from the wounding that's like well i think i want that because it's going to give me a b or c rather than like the magnetic pull that's like no your soul genuinely wants to go

that way so for me the pulls are as simple as because i'm a generator in my gut feeling like it wants to literally like fly through the air and like magnetize and like whack into some opportunity or some person or some experience. So I will like bring it back to like the really small moments because it's like that's what's like forming the path anyway. So rather than worrying about the final destination, it's very much just like what's here. But I'm not sure if that's answered your question.

when I think about surrender, I've got this sense, I don't know if other people feel like this, you get to surrender when you've just been like, totally worn down.

Yes, I think a lot of people do that though, because they're like, I'm at the edge, you've obviously got a plan for me beyond this because I've tried so hard, but I think that's the thing of like, do we only change when we're, like, uncomfortable, like, what if we could actually bring, Surrender into our day to day because that's like just being In like the river being carried by the current like you're not going to give up and let yourself drown But you're happy to be carried

by what's happening. So I think that is the thing, right? We keep ourselves afloat by being active in our life but we understand fundamentally there's like an uh, Momentum that's that's like beyond us or bigger than us And again, this is my life. Choose your belief system. Be completely cynical, agnostic, atheist, whatever. Like, you're all welcome here. And I do truly believe, like, as many people as there are on the planet, there are that many realities.

But, maybe it's instead of surrender, you could use the word momentum. , because your life will show you where that is. And I read something amazing the other day about a kinked hose and it's like that water was once flowing but now there's a kink and it's like dried up or it's like stuck. That's a good way to be like, Ooh, do we need to like let go here or do we need to straighten out the kink or whatever that like analogy brings up for you.

But, life will show you based on roadblocks and resistance. Mm source is still there. hmm. And actually the pressures building, if anything, you know. does it want to be released elsewhere? in a different way? Look at our hose knowledge. Who would have thought? should we hear from the Mooncats? Yes, please. Do you want to guess what it is? I really want it to be full moon in Capricorn. It's full. to whatever it needs to be. It's full moon in Scorpio again.

Oh, is that what we pulled at the beginning? Yeah, so when we were trying to decide between the listener questions we asked the moon card and because the moon card related to both of them, we decided we would do both questions. And obviously it was very important because it's come through again. So full moon in Scorpio, it's time to release negativity. So attuned to the moon, emote, it's better out than in. Additional meanings for this card.

It's time to move from living fearfully to living joyfully. You're right to have your suspicions. Grudges are toxic. Let something go and the end of the argument. Yeah, I think the living fearfully to living joyfully is so interesting. when we were talking about how not receiving is often linked to a fear of being judged. just did some work with a client today on , what is it that you're worried about? So like, let's say this fear of being judged and like, what opportunity can you miss out on?

Like the thing that you really want. And it's like, okay, well just making sure that we know that we're actually trading off what we really want. Like in this place, like we're trading off living joyfully because there's a chance that someone might judge us. mean the brain science about that, why we do that makes so much sense because From an evolutionary perspective we're driven to belong to the tribe, because if we don't belong to the tribe we'll, we'll die.

But when you think about it in like a conscious way, it's like, oh, so The risk that this person will have a judgment about me for what, one or two minutes, is the thing that holds me back from, something that could bring me an immense amount of joy. I don't know, it's just really interesting that most of us are making that trade off all the time. And I've said it before, but that is your assumption or your projection of that person. And so it's still come from within you.

So it's still an inner judgment. And so that's where you get to. I'm not going to do the work because it's like deep down you've created it to sometimes to protect ourselves as well as Ellen said to belong but because if it didn't exist we'd also most likely have to do the scary thing and maybe we'd be joyful and that can be scary too and that's okay accepting where we're at is also a state of being surrendered. So this said, it's time for you to feel all your feelings. Use your magic.

You have all you need inside you to bring about your desired result. I love that for the first question as well, because it really is like, if someone has come to you, like, that is them seeing your magic, and you get to see it too now. Because this also says, if you pulled this card, no matter when, your dark side and your shadow self may be showing. If you were thinking about making some magic, this is your sign to do it. Oh. I fucking love the shadow side.

Like, again, don't, as Ellen always says, like, don't put shame on the shame. Don't put shadow on the shadow. It's like, oh, okay, cool. I'm a Gemini as well, so I'm used to having a split personality. But yeah, it's, it's just cool intel. And, any, shadow is come, has come from a real strength. So what's the strength that's being asked to be expressed? Okay, well, I love you very much. I love you too. Have a beautiful night. Okay, bye. Talk to you soon. Bye!