Before the 2024 election, Maureen and Jayna had hoped to attend a historic inauguration for Kamala Harris in Washington, D.C. But when Donald Trump won the presidency, the lesbian couple scrapped their trip—and booked a fact-finding mission to Portugal instead. On this episode of How To!, they talk with co-host Carvell Wallace about their plans to leave the U.S.—and start a new life somewhere they’ll feel safer. And, Jen Barnett of Expatsi offers up advice about Portugal and other LGBTQ+ friendl...
Jan 07, 2025•46 min
Today we’re going to see if one American family can flip the usual, tortured and tedious script for arguing about politics and do something more interesting. Jenn and Todd Brandel sit down with their dad, Bruce, to see if they can come to a better understanding about what has shaped their different political views. Mónica Guzmán, senior fellow for public practice at Braver Angels and author of I Never Thought Of It That Way: How To Have Fearlessly Curious Conversations in Dangerously Divided Tim...
Dec 31, 2024•56 min
Jenn and Todd Brandel have a close, loving relationship with their father, Bruce. But one thing makes their blood boil: his political chain emails. The messages are often forwarded commentary written in a provocative tone, and are an unwelcome reminder of just how far apart the family is politically. On this episode of How To!, we’re joined by Mónica Guzmán, senior fellow for public practice at Braver Angels and author of I Never Thought Of It That Way: How To Have Fearlessly Curious Conversatio...
Dec 24, 2024•44 min
How will you remember 2024? Here at How To! Headquarters, this will be the year when a bunch of very smart and insightful guests taught us how to flirt with confidence, be a mindful drinker, make bank at a yard sale, and cope with forever parenting. On this episode, co-hosts Carvell Wallace and Courtney Martin break down their favorite advice of the year and share some heart-warming updates from listeners who joined us on the show. Did we forget to mention your favorite advice of the year? Let u...
Dec 17, 2024•58 min
Sandy is a former college athlete who knows how to exercise—at least, she used to. These days, she’s feeling lost without a coach, a workout plan, or much free time. On this episode of How To!, Carvell Wallace brings on Danielle Friedman, author of Let’s Get Physical and a contributor to the New York Times Well section. Danielle explains how to embrace movement that you love, make it fit into your life—and actually stick with it. If you liked this episode check out: How To Start Strength Trainin...
Dec 10, 2024•44 min
André has known for years that they have to execute the estate when their parents pass. They feel wholly unprepared for the task, especially since their parents are reluctant to share any important information. On this episode of How To!: Carvell Wallace brings on M.P. Dunleavey, journalist, author of the Squished Substack, and contributor to Next Avenue where she covers aging, caregiving, and money. M.P. walks André through the important paperwork that needs to be in place and gives them guidan...
Dec 03, 2024•41 min
‘Tis the season of gathering with friends and family. It’s also a time where some of us yearn for a closer community, like this week’s listener. Morgan is looking for a way to hang out with friends in a consistent, meaningful manner. On this episode of How To!, Priya Parker, author of The Art of Gathering, explains how to transform a lackluster hang-out where people just sit around drinking beer into a party with a purpose where guests want to come back. She tells us how to create an event that ...
Nov 26, 2024•46 min
Ezra is adrift in his early 20s. He craves a life of meaning, community, and love. But he’s struggling to find those things in a world that seems increasingly uncertain and discouraging for young people. On this existential episode of How To!, Courtney Martin brings in Andrew McPeak, author, podcast host, and vice president of Growing Leaders. He tackles Ezra’s big questions and explains how Gen Z (and everyone else) can make life more meaningful. If you liked this episode check out: How To Keep...
Nov 19, 2024•47 min
Contraception is a huge burden for women and people with uteruses to bear. What would it look like—on a personal, cultural, and medical level—if more men took on that responsibility? Today on How To!, a conversation about gender equity for reproductive care, from changes in sexual education to more accessible vasectomies to the development of new contraception methods. Carvell Wallace welcomes two guests: Dr. Sarah Miller, a board-certified family physician and family planning specialist at Nort...
Nov 12, 2024•46 min
Heather recently joined the board of her local library, a beloved institution from her childhood. While continuing to balance her day job, she is excited to be an active and engaged member of this community-led organization. But she’s also grappling with time management and effective communication with her fellow board members. How can she express her ideas and opinions without overstepping boundaries? In this episode of How To!, host Courtney Martin welcomes nonprofit consultant Malini Sridhara...
Nov 05, 2024•42 min
Katie is terrified of dying. As the youngest in a big family, she can’t stop thinking about the fact that all her loved ones may die before she does. Katie is a comedy writer who knows how to get laughs, but her obsession with death is real, and getting in the way of living. In this episode of How To!, we bring on Rachel Menzies, a psychologist and researcher at the University of Sydney and author of Tales from the Valley of Death, to share what she’s learned about death anxiety. Exposure therap...
Oct 29, 2024•35 min
As the parent of five kids, Sadie is no stranger to feeling overwhelmed. Most of her kids have left the nest, but one adult daughter has severe autism and can’t live or work on her own. Facing the end of school-based support services, Sadie has to figure out what comes next for her daughter—and for herself. On this episode of How To!, Carvell Wallace brings on Sarah Wayland, the founder of Guiding Exceptional Parents, to talk about parenting two autistic young adults and how to ask for help. Lin...
Oct 22, 2024•44 min
Erica judges other people by default. Whether they are acquaintances, co-workers, or new arrivals in a club, her first impression is often negative. “I would like to learn how to quash that part of myself,” she says, because those judgments might be ruling out potential friendships. On this episode of How To!, Courtney Martin brings on Dr. Terri Apter, psychologist and author of Passing Judgment: The Power of Praise & Blame in Everyday Life. Terri explains that Erica’s initial reactions are ...
Oct 15, 2024•43 min
At a new job, Jenna was put in charge of some beautiful plants that are imbued with deep significance to their co-workers. But despite Jenna’s best efforts, the plants aren’t doing so hot. Can the browning leaves, flopping stems, and dry soil be nursed back to health before it’s too late? On this episode, Carvell Wallace brings on Maria Failla, host of the Growing Joy podcast and author of Growing Joy: The Plant Lover’s Guide to Cultivating Happiness (and Plants). Maria addresses Jenna and other...
Oct 08, 2024•44 min
The How To! hosts love helping listeners find the answers they need. But sometimes a host needs help, too. On this episode, Courtney Martin and her brother, Chris, open up about how their father’s dementia has led them to upend their own lives in order to become his caregivers. To help Courtney and Chris talk through what comes next, Carvell Wallace welcomes Dr. Allison Applebaum, whose book Stand by Me chronicles her own caregiving journey and her work at Memorial Sloan Kettering’s Caregivers C...
Oct 01, 2024•54 min
Ari always dreamed of starting his own podcast. When he started interviewing fellow academics for the Taylor Swift class he’s teaching, Ari suddenly had the perfect opportunity to turn those conversations into something called ¿What Are Taylor Swift Studies Anyways? Now he just needs to find an audience. On this meta episode of How To!, Carvell Wallace brings on Lauren Passell, founder of Tink Media and author of Podcast the Newsletter. Lauren shares creative ways to find new listeners and conne...
Sep 24, 2024•48 min
Ben has two sons in the fourth grade. Like a lot of kids, they love YouTube videos, gaming, movies, and other online entertainment. Before his sons begin using social media, Ben wants to ensure they develop a good relationship with tech—and he’s ready to recruit other families at their school to agree upon some rules of engagement. On this episode of How To!, Courtney Martin brings in Richard Culatta, CEO of the International Society for Technology in Education and ASCD. He’s also the author of ...
Sep 17, 2024•47 min
After a tree destroyed Tucker’s roof during a tornado, he felt lucky to be alive—and underprepared for the next disaster his family might face. On this episode, Courtney Martin welcomes back author and former How To! host Amanda Ripley to discuss emergency preparedness and how regular citizens can react smarter during a devastating event. Amanda’s newly updated book is The Unthinkable: Who Survives When Disaster Strikes—and Why. After listening to this conversation, seek out (and save) this info...
Sep 10, 2024•45 min
With takeout prices on the rise, Josh wants to sharpen his home-cooking chops so he can whip up delicious dinners for himself and his wife. But this empty nester doesn’t want to spend all day in the kitchen. On this episode of How To!, co-host Courtney Martin consults award-winning chef, food writer, and New York Times Cooking pro Sohla El-Waylly for advice on meal prep, next-level seasoning, and preparing the best rice and beans. Sohla’s new cookbook is Start Here: Instructions for Becoming a B...
Sep 03, 2024•47 min
Several months ago, Sarah told her best friend John she’s in love with him—but he doesn’t love her back. Now Sarah can’t get John out of her head, especially because they still talk all the time. How can Sarah move on from John? On this episode of How To!, we bring on Helen Fisher, a biological anthropologist and the author of Anatomy of Love, to help Sarah train her heart—and her brain—to fall out of love. The first thing Sarah needs to do, Helen says, is cut off contact with John. Every time s...
Aug 27, 2024•37 min
Kate’s entire family loves to go on intense, day-long hikes. Kate does not. It’s just one of many differences that makes her feel like a black sheep. But Kate desperately wants to be close to her family—without disregarding her own desires or compromising on parts of her life. On this episode of How To!, Carvell Wallace brings on Dr. Lucy Blake, author of No Family Is Perfect: A Guide to Embracing the Messy Reality. Lucy helps Kate find her way to a family unity that works for everyone, while al...
Aug 20, 2024•44 min
Cooper feels like they’re constantly falling behind on their to-do list. Life is busy and household chores are the last thing they want to do. Cooper tracks everything in a detailed spreadsheet—but that spreadsheet isn’t going to take care of the dirty dishes in the sink. On this episode of How To!, Carvell Wallace brings on Dale Aucoin of Clean & Queer, a professional organizing business based in New York City. Dale explains how to prioritize tasks, make chores easier, and find a routine th...
Aug 13, 2024•41 min
When Elle started a new career as a therapist, she never imagined she would be the one in need of help. After just a few months, her position at a group practice became untenable amid a lack of support from colleagues. Now she’s looking for a new job and wants to avoid a similar scenario. On this episode of How To!, Carvell Wallace introduces Elle to leadership coach Rudhir Krishtel, who helps us rethink our relationships to co-workers—and work itself. How To’s executive producer is Derek John. ...
Aug 06, 2024•43 min
How do you learn to tell the perfect joke? In this special edition of How To!, founding host Charles Duhigg joins Courtney and Carvell to mark five years of life-changing advice with a look back at our very first episode. It features a pastor from Oklahoma who wants to spice up his sermons. We introduce him to Gary Gulman, a New York standup comedian who makes jokes about his clinical depression. They workshop the pastor’s new joke about the New Testament, and Gary reveals “what might be the mos...
Jul 30, 2024•47 min
Todd is looking for love, but he’s unsure about disclosing something in dating profiles: his multiple sclerosis. With symptoms that are increasingly visible, Todd feels compelled to be upfront about his disability with potential dates—but he doesn’t know when or how to discuss it. On this episode of How To!, Carvell Wallace brings on Jessica Slice and Caroline Cupp, authors of Dateable: Swiping Right, Hooking Up, and Settling Down While Chronically Ill and Disabled. They give Todd guidance on ha...
Jul 23, 2024•46 min
Shirley Showalter and Marilyn McEntyre know that grandparenting is more than just cookies and Play-Doh. Don’t get us wrong, those things are fun! But the art of contemporary grandparenting requires mindfulness, intentionality, and navigating boundaries. On today’s episode, Courtney Martin talks with Marilyn and Shirley about their book, The Mindful Grandparent, and the wisdom they’ve gained as elders to 12 grandchildren. If you liked this episode check out: How To Face Your Kid’s Future Do you h...
Jul 16, 2024•44 min
Trisha is craving a break from her job, but she doesn’t want to drain her bank account. On today’s episode, Courtney Martin connects Trisha to DJ DiDonna, founder of The Sabbatical Project, who’s on a quest to make extended breaks accessible to all. DJ explains how to plan for a sabbatical that is both meaningful and manageable. If you liked this episode check out: How To Hit “Reset” On Your Career Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at [email protected] or leave us a voicemai...
Jul 09, 2024•40 min
David was in the ocean in Hawaii when the unthinkable happened—a shark attacked him and bit off his leg. “I don’t think you’re gonna make it,” a medic told the 25-year-old on the helicopter ride to the hospital. But David did make it, and soon he learned that surviving the shark wasn’t the hardest part—it was what came after. On this episode of How To!, we bring in Dr. Bessel van der Kolk, psychiatrist and author of The Body Keeps the Score, to help David understand and deal with the lasting psy...
Jul 02, 2024•32 min
How To!’s senior editor Joel Meyer recently experienced a yard sale fail and wants to know what went wrong. He spent hours planning and organizing the items on his lawn, but when it was all said and done he barely made enough to cover the cost of lunch. Enter this week’s expert, Ava Seavey, a self-described master of garage-sale-ology and author of Ava’s Guide to Garage Sale Gold. Seavey tells host Courtney Martin some hilarious stories and insider tips for how to cash in on all your old stuff. ...
Jun 25, 2024•39 min
Meg once was a terror in the world of roller derby. But these days, her sedentary lifestyle is making everyday physical activities a tad daunting. (We’re looking at you, groceries that need to be carried up four flights of stairs!). She wants to start lifting weights, but she’s unsure where to start—and whether she can avoid the bro-culture of many weight rooms. On this episode of How To!: Courtney Martin brings in writer and powerlifter Mikala Jamison, who was in Meg’s shoes not that long ago. ...
Jun 18, 2024•44 min