How To! with Mike Pesca - podcast cover

How To! with Mike Pesca

Peach Fish Projectswww.mikepesca.com
You've got questions. We find answers. We all need advice, but it's not always clear who to ask. Each week, Mike Pesca invites a listener on the show to tackle a real problem, like protecting our elderly loved ones from scammers, emigrating as a throuple, and speaking without saying "um" - all with help from world-class experts: attorneys, doctors, entrepreneurs, authors, researchers - who actually know what they're talking about. Think of it as eavesdropping on someone else's therapy session, without the co-pay or awkward silence.
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Episodes

How To Kick a Meth Habit

Jason has been addicted to meth for the past 15 years, which is not uncommon in his small Illinois town. Every time Jason stopped using he would relapse, until last year when the state took custody of his two kids. Since then he's sobered up, but is worried about making it last. In this episode of How To!, we bring in Fred Muench, a clinical psychologist and recovering heroin addict who is now the president of Center on Addiction/Partnership for Drug-Free Kids. Muench knows how hard it is to bea...

Jan 21, 202029 min

How To Rob a Bank

Joe Loya robbed over 30 banks during an 18-month span before going to jail. Charles wants to rob one bank on a Saturday afternoon, and get away scot-free. Can Joe teach Charles the tricks of the trade? Or will he shatter his dreams, and a few stereotypes along the way? Also, is it a good idea to carry a microphone while attempting a robbery? Do you have a burning question or a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at howto@slate.com . This episode originally aired July 30, 2019....

Jan 14, 202030 min

How To Propose (to a Man)

Once upon a time, Ashley met a man and fell in love. Now, she's ready to get down on one knee and pop the question. But with so few women proposing to men, she's not sure how to go about it. In this episode of How To! , we bring in Caroline Kitchener, staff writer for The Washington Post's The Lily, to share her own unlikely proposal story. She tells Ashley not to worry about stealing a man's thunder. As for planning the perfect engagement, forget flash mobs and diamond rings — Kitchener says a ...

Jan 07, 202026 min

How To Make Your New Year's Resolutions Stick

How To! gave dozens of people advice this year about solving their problems. Now, we track a few of them down to see how our experts' suggestions transformed their lives. We follow up with an actor trying to get buff to play a superhero, a bachelor hoping to cook one perfect meal, a therapist who can't fall asleep, an American expat who can't decide where to live and a former cop who suffers anxiety attacks. We discover a bunch of useful tips for achieving change that sticks — just in time for 2...

Dec 31, 201928 min

How To Give a REALLY Big Gift

Mary's mother needs a new kidney — as long as it doesn't come from Mary. What's a daughter to do? In this episode of How To!, Mary hears from Larissa MacFarquhar, author of a book on extreme altruism , to learn how to convince ourselves — and others — to do the most generous things. (This episode originally aired on July 30, 2019)

Dec 24, 201929 min

How To Remember Everything

Jessica is only 26, but says her memory is 'worse than my mother's.' She forgets friends' birthdays, important details at work and worries that life is passing her by. In this episode of How To! , we bring in Joshua Foer, a former U.S.A. Memory Champion who wrote Moonwalking with Einstein: The Art and Science of Remembering Everything , to help Jessica train her brain. Josh says you don't have to be a memory champion to have a superhuman ability to remember — you just have to pay attention and l...

Dec 17, 201928 min

How To Sleep

Ben aka 'Sleepless in San Francisco' hasn't been able to get a good night's rest for over a decade. He's tried noise machines, medication, vodka, even eating cheese -- but nothing has worked. It's harming his health, his career and his dating life. In this episode of How To! , we bring in Andy Puddicombe, a former Buddhist monk and co-founder of the meditation app Headspace , to help Ben hit the hay. Andy's first tip to get more sleep at night? Start with ten minutes of meditation in the morning...

Dec 10, 201924 min

How To Get Your Kid To Finally Grow Up

Owen is about to graduate from high school and has no idea what he wants to do next. Owen doesn't seem worried, but his mom, Lisa, is freaking out. In this episode of How To! , we get help from Julie Lythcott-Haims, former Stanford dean and author of How to Raise an Adult . Julie regrets dragging her own son off to college before he was ready. Pushing your child into adulthood, she says, means asking the right questions — and then getting out of the way. Do you have a burning question or a probl...

Dec 03, 201925 min

How To Cook One Perfect Meal

Jonny is a 26-year-old bachelor whose cooking often leads to heartache (and for one ex-girlfriend, a stomachache). Jonny admits he's a klutz in the kitchen, so we hooked him up with Sam Sifton , cookbook raconteur and head of the New York Times' Cooking section , to see if we can teach our lovelorn millennial to cook one perfect meal. Is romantic bliss just a well-browned chicken thigh away? (This episode first aired on August 13, 2019)...

Nov 26, 201930 min

How To Win At Online Dating

Traci is a single, professional woman looking for love. She builds furniture in her spare time, enjoys dancing and can't believe she has to devote an hour each day to swiping through photos and sending flirty texts. Traci's quest for romance is made harder by the fact that, as a black woman, she has to put up with more nonsense than usual. In this episode of How To! we ask Thirst Aid Kit hosts Nichole Perkins and Bim Adewunmi to share their insights on modern desire. They revamp Traci's profile,...

Nov 19, 201926 min

How To Perform Under Pressure

Mike's dream job of playing bass in a Chicago orchestra is within reach — if only he can conquer his nerves and master the audition. In this episode of How To!, we bring in Dr. Don Greene , a peak performance psychologist who's worked with Wall Street traders and Olympic athletes, to see if he can help Mike perform his best under the spotlight. The secret? Jumping jacks, extra sleep, and watching reruns of The Office. Do you have a problem that needs solving? Have you found the advice on our pod...

Nov 12, 201928 min

How To Withstand Pain

Sophie is a typical mom … who runs ultramarathons in her spare time. She's pretty tough but an upcoming 268-mile race across the loneliest parts of England is freaking her out. So we turned to Wim Hof, aka "The Iceman" for advice. Because when you are worried about pain, you should definitely consult a Dutch extreme athlete who sits in freezing water for fun. (Really!) (This episode first aired on July 30, 2019)

Nov 05, 201930 min

How To Not Be Scared

Becca is 6-feet tall, bold and strong-willed. She's also easily startled and paralyzed by fear — even a children's haunted house can reduce her to tears. In this episode of How To! , we bring in sociologist Margee Kerr , author of Scream: Chilling Adventures in the Science of Fear , to give us the lowdown on surviving scary situations. Can making fear more fun help Becca overcome her startle reflex in time for Halloween? Do you have a problem that needs solving? Have you found the advice on our ...

Oct 29, 201927 min

How To Fire Your Daughter

Kyle wants to sell his 50-year old family insurance business so he can finally retire. But a troublesome employee is holding him back: his daughter. In this episode of How To!, Harvard Business School professor Christina Wing tries to help Kyle figure out how to sell his company without sabotaging their relationship. But if you have to fire your daughter, is it ever strictly business?

Oct 22, 201928 min

How To Put Down Your Phone

How many times have you looked at your phone so far today? Do you feel like you're choosing to look, or automatically craving it when you ought to be enjoying life? In this episode of How To! we get advice from Jia Tolentino , New Yorker writer and author of Trick Mirror , who spends hours on the phone every day for her job. And Cal Newport , author of Digital Minimalism , whose 30-day 'digital declutter' helps us think more deeply, be more present, and control our devices so they don't control ...

Oct 15, 201924 min

How To Be Funny

How do you learn to tell the perfect joke? A pastor from Oklahoma wants to spice up his sermons from the pulpit. So we introduce him to Gary Gulman , a New York standup comedian who makes jokes about his clinical depression in the new HBO comedy special The Great Depresh . The lesson? "Man plans, and God laughs." But only if you nail the delivery. (This episode first aired on July 30, 2019)...

Oct 08, 201927 min

How To Decide To Have a Baby

Megan is 35 years old, a lawyer, happily married — and suddenly not sure if she wants to be a mom. She always figured one day the maternal urge would kick in, but so far she's only felt ambivalence. Does that mean that she shouldn't have a baby? We asked Cheryl Strayed , author of Wild , how she juggled this question. She tells us the secret to approaching situations where there is no going back, and how regret — regardless of what we choose — is always part of the equation....

Oct 01, 201928 min

How To Go On a Family Adventure

Can a family travel around the world for a year without killing each other? Dan Kois spent a year in New Zealand, The Netherlands, Costa Rica and Kansas with his wife Alia and their two young daughters, learning how other cultures parent. The result is How to Be A Family: The Year I Dragged My Kids Around the World . What's the secret to traveling together for that long? And what do you do when everyone is tired and whiny and wants to go home?...

Sep 24, 201928 min

How To Look Like a Superhero

How did Ryan Reynolds and Hugh Jackman get so buff to play Deadpool and Wolverine? An up-and-coming Hollywood actor wants to know so he can land his own superhero role. We turn to Reynolds' and Jackman's trainer, Don Saladino , who says the key to six-pack abs and bulging biceps is not what you think. In fact, it's something we can all do.

Sep 17, 201927 min

How To Stress Your Kid the Right Way

Is there a right way to let kids struggle and fail? How do you raise resilient children? And most important, when should you help out, and when should you chill out? We ask Dr. Wendy Mogel , author of The Blessing of a Skinned Knee to advise a Portland, Oregon couple who worry about their son getting wet in a squirt gun fight.

Sep 10, 201927 min

How To Survive a Pandemic

Have you ever wondered how you would fare in the apocalypse? Perhaps you have envisioned yourself, shotgun loaded, prepared to mete out kindhearted justice and tough-love defense in equal measure. It turns out, though, that when the next pandemic comes, it might not be exactly like the movies. We get tips from a public health expert at Johns Hopkins — and a member of the Zombie Squad . Their advice isn't quite the same.

Sep 03, 201928 min

How To Stop Being Anxious

Matt has anxiety attacks. Every day. When he gets too many texts, when he starts worrying about his family, when the unexpected occurs: that's when the sweat starts and his mind begins racing. He's a strong guy — he was a cop — but he thinks today's problem is connected to a tragic event in the past, and he doesn't know what to do. We introduce him to Dr. Ben Michaelis , a clinical psychologist and habit expert, to help Matt figure out what's triggering his anxiety attacks and how he can get bac...

Aug 27, 201927 min

How To Uproot Your Life

A decade after Elizabeth's family left the U.S. to live in Portugal, they're wondering if it's time to move back. So, we turn to professional poker player, Annie Duke , who treats every decision like it's a bet. She says think of each choice as a wager on your future self. But how do you go all in when you're uncertain about the odds?

Aug 20, 201926 min

How To Cook One Perfect Meal

Jonny is a 26 year-old bachelor whose cooking often leads to heartache (and for one ex-girlfriend, a stomach ache). Jonny admits he's a klutz in the kitchen, so we hooked him up with Sam Sifton , cookbook raconteur and head of the New York Times's Cooking section , to see if we can teach our love-lorn Millennial to cook one perfect meal. Is romantic bliss just a well-browned chicken thigh away? ( Recipe included!)...

Aug 13, 201930 min

How To Fire a Bad Employee

Gabe wants to fire a bad employee, but still be a good boss. We turn to Stanford professor of management science, Bob Sutton ( The No Asshole Rule and Good Boss, Bad Boss ) for help. First, Sutton says, Gabe has to act like a boss, not a friend. Then he should write a letter, focus on compassion and hide the box of tissues.

Aug 06, 201927 min

How To Withstand Pain

Sophie Power once breastfed her newborn during an ultramarathon, but an upcoming 268-mile race across a remote stretch of Great Britain is freaking her out. We turn to Wim Hof, aka "The Iceman," for advice. Because when you are worried about pain, you should definitely consult a Dutch extreme athlete who sits in freezing water for fun. (Really!)

Jul 31, 201929 min

How To Give Your Mom a Kidney

Mary's mother needs a new kidney — as long as it doesn't come from Mary. What's a good daughter to do? With the clock ticking, Mary hears from Larissa MacFarquhar, author of a book on extreme altruism , to learn how to convince ourselves — and others — to do the most generous things.

Jul 30, 201929 min

How To Be Funny

How do you learn to tell the perfect joke? A pastor from Oklahoma wants to spice up his sermons. So we introduce him to Gary Gulman , a New York standup comedian who makes jokes about his clinical depression. The lesson? "Man plans, and God laughs." But only if you nail the delivery.

Jul 30, 201927 min

How To Rob a Bank

Joe Loya robbed over 30 banks during an 18-month span before going to jail. Charles wants to rob one bank on a Saturday afternoon, and get away scot-free. Can Joe teach Charles the tricks of the trade? Or will he shatter his dreams, and a few stereotypes along the way? Also, is it a good idea to carry a microphone while attempting a robbery?

Jul 30, 201930 min
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