Using Financial Stress to Your Advantage #371

always make sure that doesn't happen to you. But during this episode, man, we're gonna talk about stress in a way, uh and specifically stress when it comes to our money. And you know, obviously there's the obvious kind of downsize to it, but we're gonna talk about the upsides, the upshots to financial stress and how we can use it to further us along down our path of personal using something that's commonly perceived to be negative as an advantage.

I like that we're gonna talk about that today. But before we get to that, man, I want to mention that my wife just bought a smart watch. Oh your wife, did you had like this cheapo watch on here in the notes? And I thought maybe you got a new one now, so I think I've we we've talked before, how I am kind of against the smart watch, at least for myself in my own life on my wrist.

I don't really want another screen to be checking, although some people have actually said that having a smart watch actually means you check your phone less often because you can like quickly glance at your watch and then you're done with it. But it's still a screen, Yeah, and you're still being distracted from whatever you're doing. Yeah, I'm with you. So I'm gonna avoid it for the time being.

But my wife, she said, well, she she she started doing some research and she was just interested in potentially getting a smart watch. You know, the name brand ones. They're kind of expensive and right, yeah, something like that Apple watch whatever. I think so, and you know, she's gotten Android, so I don't even think those play nicely together. Something that was even a possibility. She's got to get

that Samsung on her wrist. I think she would have. Yeah, she'd have to get one of the andwer watches, like Google makes one, Samsung makes one. But it turns out that there are a lot of like non name brand smart watches out there now. Too, and the technology has gotten a whole lot better at the cheap end of the spectro and so yeah, so she got a one off Amazon. I'll link to the one that she purchased

in the show notes. But she's loving it because some of the I think additional benefits of having one of the really nice name brand ones she doesn't care about. She really wants this to track steps, heart rate, monitor her sleep and it has a lot of those those functions. She can retext on it too. Um. And so yeah, there's another watch. I forget what the name brand of hers is. Again, I said, well, we'll link to in the show notes. But Wise is another brand we've talked about. Wise.

They've got some cool stuff, like some cool cheap headphones, so um, you know, they do home security incredibly cheap. Instead of getting the Nest came or some of the different camera setups in your home that typically costs like like a hundred two hundred bucks for these cameras. Wise, Man, those cameras are bucks. You actually and me onto them last year. Yeah, so so those are great. By the way, it's spelled w y z E and you Well, we'll link to wis is in the show notes as well.

But yeah, the cool thing is that she didn't have to spend very much and it's got the functionality she's looking for. And I think sometimes we just assume that we need the top of the line or the brand new thing that cost three dollars in order to be happy, in order to get the things we need. And Emily

was like, well, what am I looking for? Let me read the reviews, let me, you know, sort through a bunch of different watches and find one that is relatively inexpensive that's gonna have the functionality that I actually need, not all the stuff that I don't. Um. So, yeah, we'll see how long at last, you know, smart watch might last for a year, may not last very long, maybe not even that long. We'll put it on the calendar.

Maybe a year from now, we'll check back in and maybe Emily can come on give us her little smart

watch update. But but dude, I'm with you. So the only thing that I feel like I've ever considered getting a smart watch for is I've heard that you can like, they buzz, like, they can vibrate, and I would love a solution where I could have an alarm set specifically in the morning so that when I wake up, it doesn't wake up eat because in order for it to be loud enough for me to hear, it's oftentimes, you know, loud enough for her to hear as well, and she

kind of hates that. I try to get up super quietly. But if I just had a little smart watch on my wrist and it buzz and that, you know, that's how I was able to wake up, I think that could be. That could be pretty cool. Can I tell you the number one feature of this watch that she got though? What So she's constantly misplacing her phone and she's always asking me to call her phone so she can find it. This smart watch has like a locate my phone feature. So dude, my life has already gotten

way better because she watch. Well, I mean even iPhones are I feel like most phones have that feature. But you just said, I mean, you have to sit down at a computer log in that wet whereas I guess with that watch is just already on her. She just pushes a button exactly kind of like beeps off in the distance. It's made us both much happier night. But yeah, all right, Matt, let's mentioned the beer that we're having on today's show. This one is from Bolero Snort Brewery.

It's called a mouhito. It's a logger with lime juice and mint. We'll give our thoughts on this one at the end of the episode. This was a brewer out of New Jersey. I had never heard of before. It just kind of picked it up on a whim. I just noticed that it's a Mouhito, not Mohito. They've got a little cow cattle theme going on, I guess with their brewery. But yeah, man, looking forward to enjoying this one and sharing our thoughts at the end of the episode.

For now, let's get onto the topic of hand. We are talking about how you can use financial stress to your advantage. And Matt, I know you've never done this. Have you ever said anything really dumb? Yes? But I am doing it less and less as good as I age. I'm getting wiser. Well. I think like I've definitely said a lot of dumb things. One because I just have this propensity to talk, and I think when you talk more,

you say more dumb things. If I shot my mouth a little more, I probably would say fewer, But then I sometimes make it worse because I try to explain, you know, where I was coming from, and then people are like, that doesn't make it any better, and they're just give me a little little confused. I think we've all been there, right, we all had that kind of like foot in the mouth moment, like, oh, man, if I just shut up five minutes ago, I'd be in

a much better spot with this person, in this situation. Whatever. Maybe maybe it was like to a teacher after you got a bad grade on a test and you somehow talk to yourself into a d from us, you know, like because that's how bad it went. Um. But yeah, I think if we had just stopped at the first idiotic thing, it would have turned out better for us and humans, Matt, We're anxious creatures and money is one of the most stressful topics we face. That's why we

wanted to talk about this today. It's not always a poor money decision that leads to uh significantly higher stress levels. Often it's the reaction that we have when we mess up that creates these compounding effects that creates more stress in our lives. And so, yeah, we want to talk about, like how do we eliminate stress or mitigate stress in our lives? And then also maybe in some ways use that stress to our advantage in the future. Yeah, and and of course, you know, it's important to note that

stress does have some positive benefit in our lives. You know, it doesn't exist for no reason. But it's crucial for us to make some changes though, so that you know, our anxiety over money, that it doesn't cause us to curl up into a ball unable to take any positive steps that can help us to move in the right direction. This is idle in order to you know, keep it from becoming a full blown personal crisis. And of course, you know, in the last fifteen months they have been

especially stressful. But even before the pandemic, we saw that Northwestern Mutual they actually did a study back in sixteen and they found that a five percent of Americans feel anxious about their finances. And the American Institute of Stress, which is I gotta imagine that's an interesting place to work. It's either the chilliest or the most stressful place to work.

I'm not sure it's on how they tackler the stress, but they say that the number two cause of stress in America is you guessed it, money At it's it was actually just one percent point behind something, uh, you know, really minor. The future of our nation work comes in at number three after that. But it's worth pointing out that a lot of folks are dealing with some amount of financial stress. We want you to know that you're not alone. Yeah, obviously it plagues a huge amount of people,

and Matt, I think we already know this. So we're gonna talking about some of the positive benefits of financial stress in your life. I know, actually there are there are some. It sounds counterintuitive, but also talk about how stress can be bad, right, and people probably already know some of this stuff, but there's but this, this here is a little reminder, right that overwhelming amounts of stress can have a massive negative impact on our health and

on our relationships. That stress can lead to things like cardiovascular disease, ulcers, and worse and unmanageable. Stress takes a toll on the physical body as well. Not I even saw a recent study that found that overworked individuals are more stressed and it leads to a lot of premature deaths in our country. So, yeah, the negative realities of stress are real. It takes a toll on us, but

it also takes a toll on our relationships. When we're overly stressed about anything we're we're more likely to take it out on the people that we love the most, and that leads to like messed up relationships and in many cases, consistent money stress can rek havoc on a marriage. Money fights are the second leading cause of divorce, and almost half of couples that have fifty dollars or more in consumer debt say that money is the leading cause

of arguments in their homes. That's a big deal. Stress is obviously causing a lot of strife for a lot of people. Yeah, that's right, And you know, the reactions that we have to the stressors in our lives can just make things worse. According to the American Psychological Association, the top stress relieving activities are watching TV for over two hours, uh, serving the Internet, napping, eating, drinking, and smoking.

Uh So, you know, basically, it's just a laundry list of things that might be okay and and you know, in extreme moderation, maybe maybe not the smoking because that's never actually a good thing, But the rest of them are okay in moderation. But we're over indulging in all of them because Americans are just so stressed out, and so money troubles are a big part of what gets us to that point where we feel like we need

these different coping mechanisms. Yeah, it's like, um, so stressed out, the only thing I can think of doing is popping in the couch and watching two and a half hours of Netflix, right, which is essentially ignoring the stress, right, Like you're you're basically running from it. You're you're not facing the problems and instead you're just pretending that it doesn't exist, which, um only makes the problem worse in almost every case. And we've talked about this as well before.

But sometimes we spend too much money because we're stressed out, and spending spreeze, you know, or retail therapy is what it's sometimes called, can be an attempt to basically wallpaper over the emotions that we're feeling. But that also makes things worse. Right. Some folks actually at Duke University, they found what they do, they do a lot of great like behavioral money work there. They found that instead of

stress spending, people should instead try stress saving. And that feels that, Yeah, I can get behind that too, but I'm sure a lot of a lot of people listening are like that, yeah, that what does that do for? Yeah it sounds great, but that doesn't actually relieve stress. And you know, I can understand why you might respond that way. But but but the interesting thing is what they got to the root of is that spending it actually

puts you in a worse hole. Right, But the behavioral final folks are Dukes said that the main benefit we get from the act of spending is the act of actually making a decision, picking something out, buying it. Boom, it's on our the way to our house. Basically like the autonomy you have over your life. Yeah. Yeah, that's the part of spending that feels good. It's not necessarily even getting the item right. And so their solution was to say that instead of purchasing that item, transfer that

exact amount of money to your savings. It gives you the same satisfaction but benefits you obviously in a more positive way, and your money going to Amazon or some other you know, online retailer. That money is going into your savings account, but you're actually physically doing something, You're taking an action. And so yeah, if if Duke and how the money can combine efforts and make stress saving a thing. I think that'd be awesome. Yeah, so that's

a nice little action step. A little takeaway early in the episode, which doesn't always happen, how the money. But you know, all of these things are all the traditionally negative views towards stress, right, Like, we we don't want you to be overwhelmed and stressed out, and definitely not because of money issues. But we think that there's actually a much better way to view the stress in our lives. You know, we think that you can actually put stress

in a positive light. Uh, maybe it's less about conquering and combating stress, right, it's not something that we're just trying to overcome. What if you're able to discover how stress will allow you to get ahead with your money and so we'll talk more about that right after this break. All right, now, let's get to kind of some of the heart of what we wanted to cover on this episode.

Le taking into the meat. Yeah, let's talk about stress and how it can actually be good and benefit you potentially. Um So, yeah, before we talked about how you respond when financial stress hits. We're gonna kind of get some practical steps on that later. It's important to point out that stress isn't an inherently terrible thing. Like when we're stressed, the purpose of the physiological response of our body is

to overcome whatever obstacles might be in our way. Ourselves are releasing dopamine and adrenaline so that we actually have a boost of energy and alertness. And this is like the fight or flight response we all learned about an elementary school, right, And it's like when when someone challenges you to a fight, either like you get so pumped up you punch them in the nose, or you run away. I usually ran away. You gets bumps and said, all the hair on your arm stands on end. Yep, it

makes you look bigger. I still ran away. That's always how I handled I fight's growing up and still to this day. But they happened, Um, they never really happened growing up either, Let's be honest. But yeah, this is like how our bodies naturally respond to conflict, and really what we want to talk about in this episodes. How do we use that response, that physiological response when it comes to how stress impacts our lives. How do we use that not to our detriment, not to curl up

in a ball, but actually to use it to our advantage. Yes, and so maybe it's not overcoming financial stress, but maybe it's more utilizing stress to overcome financial obstacles. Right. It's sort of like Judo, you know, like the martial arts, right. I heard about it. Never did it karate though, for like I don't know, maybe three months and it still didn't serve you. Well, I guess in those little on this playground scuffles, didn't know I broke one board though,

that's my claim to fame. I still wanted to do that as a kid, you know, like you'd see kids on TV swear they get special boards for weak kids, like they do. But okay, so it's like Judo, right, and so if we can use the momentum and weight of stress that we encounter against the negative and the more unhealthy behaviors that were that were tempted to adopt, then we will be able to see incredible growth in our lives. Uh. And so kind of like extending that

metaphor as we think of our bodies. You know what happens when you lift weights or you work out that resistance, say of a kettle bell like that right there? That is stress, but the same stress is actually what causes our muscles to grow, and so we wanted to mention this because the proper amount of stress in our lives makes us stronger in the same thing is also true

of our finances. Yeah, man, especially like when when we think back to the periods in our life when we were performing at the highest levels, like we can probably bet that there was some amount of stress in our lives. Um, And I think I think back to school, right, I remember doing a couple of overnighters, and like I didn't realize how many books I could read and maybe how much and how much information I can remember eyes until getting that great and graduating, maybe what was dependent on it.

Like I almost needed that challenge like that, I'm a I'm a procrastinator to the core, and so I needed to be kind of like pushed up against the wall in order to like you know, give my stress levels raised so that I could react accordingly. Yeah, I felt that way when it came to a scholarship. I mean I was getting ready to lose a big scholarship, and man, talk about me buckling down and actually getting the grades I needed to when money was on the line. Yeah,

I studied. Yeah, and like I think to other people, maybe they never knew just how creative they could be until a project at work, let's say, for instance, required

a completely different way of viewing the problem. And then when it comes to our finances, a lot of people probably never realized how little money they could live on until they lost a job they were out of work, or maybe they never realized how much they could earn until they had set a goal to save up a down payment on a house and they're like, I really want to do that in the next two years. I've got to earn more money to get there, all right,

How am I gonna make this happen? Um? And So I think sometimes you have those stressful situations, they create the ability in us that otherwise, if we're just kind of hanging out at a more relaxed pace, we're not forced to get creative. We're not forced to work harder, you know, we're not forced to think about things differently. And it's not that stress is always good, but that

kind of stress can be a huge motivator. Yeah, I mean, I think it's a good thing because it shows us that we care, right, It's something that we're connected to because if we didn't feel stressed towards something that, you know that was kind of pushing up in our lives. Well, that just means we're kind of apathetic to whatever that thing is. And so I think I see it as a healthy amount of concern, right, Like that's kind of how we're trying to view stress here. We're trying to

view it through that lens. But of course, you know, it's important to point out that, like we're making an argument here that a proper amount of stress in our lives, in healthy doses like that is beneficial. You know, Like it kind of makes me think of just kind of like filling up your cup at the sink, getting some water, just a little bit of you know, some of that water, a little bit of stress in our lives. It can

I think it can go a long way. Uh. That's a lot different than trying to like drink from a fire hydrant. Right. It's hard to grow and to make progress with our money when we're constantly facing just an

overwhelming barrage of financial stressors in our life. But please please tell me you've never tried to drink from a fire now, but you've heard people talking about, Yeah, I just wonder if someone's actually trying just too much um like it's so for instance, like we don't want someone in a vicious cycle of only paying the minimums on their credit cards because you've got too many financial obligations like this would be an instance of bad stress that

leads to poor decisions and outcomes. Earlier, Joe, before the break, you talked about couples who when faced with constant stress in their lives, how that can lead to the relationship

uh suffering. We think that with the right amount of stress that you would be amazed at the amount of work that you'd be able to get done, like specifically with like with a couple right where you know you got your partner when you feel a little bit of stress and you both are on board, and it forces you to talk about say your your money that I don't think you can help but to be more efficient, to spend wisely with your dollars, or to you know,

to start earning more money. But if the stress is too much and it's constant, that's when it can be negative in our lives. And that's when when I think it can often lead us to take some of those unhealthy behaviors and where we resort to some of those

vices as we're trying to escape that stress. Yeah, letting that stress overwhelm you is the worst place you can find yourself, really and and so so, Matt, I think you know, we've we've kind of tried to reframe how we view financial stress in our lives, at least to a certain degree, that it's not all negative. Some of it can be good. It can actually cause us to rise to new heights. And it's important to recognize how that stress is going to allow us to achieve financial

goals that we've set for ourselves. Right, And it's really helpful to focus on the positive goals instead of only focusing on the negative, stressful steps that might take to get there. Right. For for example, it might be difficult to constantly be saying to yourself, don't spend too much money on the credit cards this month, um, when instead maybe we should be focusing on why we're wanting to

slim down the budget in the first place. Maybe it's two for the first time, have a decent working emergency fund, that financial margin, that breathing room that's so important, right, Or it's this goal to finally be able to take a vacation. Maybe it's been a few years. Um, it's probably been at least a year for for all of us.

But yeah, like that, that's a great goal for a lot of people who who may be saying, I need to save up two thousand dollars to take a vacation this year, but it's been so hard in years past, and our family we really really need it. Been focusing on that goal first, the end goal, instead of all the little things it's going to take to get there at the beginning at least reframes some of the actions that you're gonna have to think about later. It makes them,

I think, less daunting, right man. And here's the thing too. I know that we're talking about stress in a sort of very clinical, kind of unemotional way, but it's worth mentioning that financial stress it's not always rational, right. It's it's difficult to kind of be out in the real world experiencing the you know, the day to day things that we're faced with in our lives and to be

this kind of straightforward and clinical about it. Um. And you know, we're actually gonna talk with Michelle Singletary next week, and she's been writing about money for decades. She's incredibly frugal, and I think probably because of that, she admits to having anxiety when it comes to spending on things that

she's been diligently saving. Four it's something that there's a there's almost like a disconnect between the head knowledge of you know, understanding something like the way we're talking about it right now, versus putting that knowledge into action. And so for for Michelle, the difficulty lies and being able to enjoy some of what she's actually worked hard in

order to achieve. Yeah, I feel like financial stress isn't always because someone's living paycheck to paycheck, um, And for somebody like Michelle and kind of like for myself, I feel like that's that's super evident because even when you are frugal and you've handled money well for a long period of time, like all the numbers point to the fact that you really shouldn't be that stressed out, Like you're saving a good portion of what you make, your

investments are looking good, um. But still, I think if you have that hyper frugal gene like you, you also have to work to overcome some of the stresses that money can bring in your life. And maybe you're stressing about things that you really don't need to be And I know that's yeah, that's can be the case in my life as well, where I need to work to

combat some of those stressors. But in real life, like in the moment when I'm feeling those things, like, it's it's not easy, right, It's not easy to to do that self talk and say, you know what, it's okay, let's look at the numbers. Uh, the emotion. It can be really difficult to combat the emotion that you're feeling with the numbers on the page. Yeah, it takes work to control how we feel about the financial situations that

we have gotten ourselves. And you know that we find ourselves in into a certain extent, like we have to be willing to kind of rein in our emotions and and I think viewing stress is something that we can harness like that will allow us to take control of

not only our lives, but our money too. And so, now that we've reframed you know what we think is a better way to view financial stress, right after the break, we're going to dive into some practical ways that will allow you to transform that stress into for progress with your money. Alright, we're back from break. We're talking about financial stress and how you can actually use it to

your advantage. And Matt, So, we've talked about how stress is traditionally viewed as a negative thing that should be avoided at all costs. But I think sometimes when we think about stress that way, Um, if we just want everything in life to be super easy, we never have to rise to the challenge. Stress, in many ways, in some forms, can be a helpful motivator. And like also too, we've talked about how rewiring the way that we think

about stress can help us get ahead. Now let's zero in on some of the specific ways that we can use stress for good in our lives and to be helpful for our finances. Yeah, so first you want to identify you know what we're gonna call the trouble spots. Right, it's hard to manage stress that you might be experiencing

when you're not even sure what's causing it. And so in order to do this, we would we think that tracking your spending that is really important in the step if you aren't already doing that, right, because how can you figure out the trouble spots if you aren't doing the basic financial necessity. Finding some clarity around the biggest money culprits in your life that need your attention is

really important. And then after that, once you have tracked your money, that's when you can create a plan to tell cool those different culprits one by one. Yeah, man, I feel like looking at the numbers. Actually it's like the exact opposite of what I said before the break, But sometimes it actually can be distressing. We've almost like built up this problem in our heads, but we don't know how big the problem is or what it is if we don't know the numbers. And so I think

you're right identifying some of those trouble spots, you know. Yeah, getting specific with what the problem is is like huge in the attempt to remedy it, because otherwise it's sort of like this vague malaise hanging over your financial situation, right because you don't exactly know what's wrong, but you know something's wrong, but you gotta put in the work

to actually figure out what it is. Yeah, it's like I know my money sucks, but I don't know how bad, like how bad the situation is, and so or and maybe it's not as bad as you think, and that might be distressing in and of itself, So I agree, Yeah, identifying the trouble spots is key. It should be the first thing that you're doing in order to try to distress your financial situation. And you mentioned Matt having a plan, which is, you know, in financial terms, the plan is

the budget. Yeah, planned for your money. That's a budget, that's right, Yeah, And so yeah, one of our favorite budgeting apps called You Need a Budget or wine app for short. They conducted a survey and they found that a huge majority of their users, three out of four, who had a zero based budget, which means all their

dollars are spoken for. Every single month, they go to specific areas of their financial life, whether it's saving, spending, investing, paying off debt, and then if they checked that budget on a weekly basis, they had little to know financial stress. So, like, even when you're in a good spot financially, it's still possible to feel overwhelmed, like I talked about, Like I get there, and I know a lot of fellow money

nerds who feel the same way. They feel stressed about their finances even though they're doing good with their money. But it's so much easier, I think to avoid burnout when your budget is working well, when you have a game plan, and when you're consistently checking in on it.

So yeah, tracking your spending, identifying those trouble spots. But then also you know, having that budget and checking in on it regularly, that's a way to be more in tune with what's actually happening in you're finding too and it's gonna like, yeah, lower the stress level in almost every case, that's right, man. And after that, we would recommend for folks just to tackle one thing at a time.

Once you've created a plan for your money, we want you to be realistic about the time that's actually gonna take to work on that list of the different trouble spots that you're working on. Uh makes me think of Rome, right. Rome wasn't built in a day. In your financial ship, it's not going to be righted in one single day either. We want everyone out there to be kind to yourselves. It's you know, likely took you years to get into

the financial hole that you might have found yourself in. Uh, and it's probably gonna take some time for you to climb out. But trying to remedy say a dozen different financial trouble spots in a week or two will likely lead to unmanageable stress. And so again, a small amount of stress is good like that informs you, but an unmanageable and overwhelming amount of stress can lead to some some tough spots. So focus on the most important trouble spot and kick that one's butt, and then after that

move on to number two. It's also helpful to be organized and making sure that you're sitting aside the proper amount of time to work on your finances as well, and so commit and include a weekly counter slot so that you're working on your finances regularly, not trying to accomplish everything and just one fell swoop, but do it methodically and with some regularity. Yeah. Man, it's good to have high standards. It's good to have big goals that

you're shooting for. But I think, yeah, if you if you set the bar too high, Uh, let's say you're like, it's your first time pole vaulting and you said they literally set the bar really high, Um, You're you're probably gonna like crash into it with your head or something like that, and that might completely eliminate your desire to do pole jumping anymore. And I think it's that way

with with a whole lot of things. If you're like, I want to run uh six minute mile, and that that's a that's a great goal, just realize that if you haven't ran in like eight years, you're probably not going to hit that anytime soon. Again, it's this great long term goal, but but you have to be realistic about the time frame to get there so that you don't get completely bummed out in the process and forget

it all together, just scrap the goal together. You want to make sure you approach your money in the same way that you're not like, I'm gonna pay off all this credit card debt in a month and a half when it's actually if you look at it in what fits into your budget, it's gonna take, you know, fourteen months. You want to be realistic so that you can actually

achieve those goals. It's important to Matt as we're you know, attempting to achieve those goals, to track our progress along the way, because it feels really really good when you do make progress, like when you do pay off that first credit card of three or four right that you have a lot of a balance on. But really it's it's easy, I think, to allow stress to maybe show up and like Steven Seagal style or Chuck Norris style, kicked down your mental door rather than like politely knocking

and kind of being that accelerator. It just does us in right, it messes us up mentally. Uh So, Yeah, keep a list on hand and cross out the items in a red pen and keep a physical list when they've been completed, so you can throw a mini celebration and then and then remember how far you've come and if you need a quick win, which quick wins always helpful. So for instance, let's say you want to to make that six mile run happen, get out and run today, even if it's just a tenth of a mile. Um.

But yeah, check out episode two sixty. We we did an episode called seven Ways to Save More this week, and we really wanted to give people a way to do one thing a day for seven days to be able to save more and spend less. And that's a good resource for you as you want to accelerate that progress because there's just something really important about getting that first win under your belt. I feel like Matt, one win is indicative of another one. Sometimes you get on

a roll momentum is underrated. It can be a game changer. Yeah, there's nothing like breaking that losing streak, right, and dude, don't forget about the fund as well, the emergency fund. Having cash in the bank is Yeah. We we feel it's one of the biggest differences between stress just completely dominating every thought versus your ability to learn from what your stress might be teaching you. Right, So maybe you're thinking like that, you know that credit card debt and

stressing you out. I get it, and I know you want to pay it off as soon as possible. But having money on hand, starting with the two thousand, four hundred and sixty seven dollars that we like to see that takes precedent even over high interest rate credit card debt, and so make sure to keep that around. Uh. Really, it's like a soothing bomb to know that you've got liquid funds available should you need them. Yeah, that's a super practical way to avoid some of the stressful situations

that that money mistakes can get you into. Just having that cash in the bank account can eliminate a huge percentage of the financial stressors, or at least minimize them right and make them not seem like as big of a deal as we make them out to be. Also, to Matt, I think it's it's important for people to ask for support from the people in their lives. That can also help with the level of financial stress in your life. And I'm not talking about hiring a financial planner.

I think that is one of the things maybe that people go to instinctively, is they go pay someone big bucks and they say, help me out. I'm stressed out. But that doesn't always work the way you want it to. So yeah, talking with maybe a partner or a trusted friend can really help put things in perspective. Matt, we just met with a couple recently over beers. They're about to have a baby, and so they're getting more nervous about their financial situation. They're like, are we doing this right?

And so yeah, I feel like you and I we were able to offer some help, but we were also able to reassure them that they are doing well with their finances, that they're crushing it. Yeah, they're in a great position, and like, sometimes you just need a dose of confidence building kindness to lower the negative emotions that you're feeling. You're stressed out with that perspective from someone else can help you realize that you're doing a better

job than you thought you were. That outside input can be invaluable and kind of yeah, lowering the level of money stress in your life. Yeah, man, that outside input can be helpful. I think journaling and going to counseling could also be you know, some other ways to manage your stress. Uh. And you know why we want to encourage everyone to slow down and to be introspective. If things are bad enough, it's true that you might need

the help of of of a nonprofit budget counselor. We would recommend for folks to check out Money Management International or NAPFA dot org. Uh. If you feel that you're in over your head when it comes to debt. You know, here on the show, our focus is on the money aspect, but you know, sometimes the stress goes beyond just finances. Uh. Mental health extends beyond those money conversations that that we

often have here on the show. And so the National Alliance on Mental Illness they actually have resources on their site to help if you need more than just a budget counselor or a couple of friendly dudes to kind of talk through your finances. With and we'll make sure to link to all of those sites on our website. Yeah, sometimes a budget counselor is you know, the right thing, that's the person you need. Sometimes it's just a friend, and sometimes it is you know, an actual license therapist

or a counselor. Um and Matt, I think you know one other way in which we can lower the level of stressing our lives that's often overlooked, and it's probably because we are turning to things like self care a little bit too much. We're turning on Netflix, or we're scrolling through our phones in order to kind of not

focus on the things that are stressing us out. But sometimes we're just way too focused on ourselves, Like we see all the little things that might not be as big of a deal as we're making them out to be. And so I think one of the perfect antidotes is taking time to serve someone else. That might mean having a friend over for dinner who's been having a tough time. Let's say they lived alone during the pandemic and they

are just massively in need of some social interaction. Um, you know, making dinner for them and having a glass of wine together and talking and just caring for them in that way I think can be a huge d stressor or volunteering in your community to tutor kids after school. There really is like something almost magical about serving others and how it affects our stress levels in a positive way.

I think it just puts everything in perspective, helping us realize that there's a whole lot more going on in this world than just our problem, whether it's money based or or something else. Yeah, but I think volunteering and service projects, um and and just caring for someone else, whether it's a neighbor or a friend really well is definitely a way to help mitigate some of the stresses

that we're feeling. Yeah. I think when we're able to remove ourselves from our own situations sometimes and kind of look at the world and ah, you know, with a wider lens, it definitely provides some of that that missing perspective in our lives. And so, man, you know that kind of as we wrap things up here, we we feel that it's impossible to kick stress to the curb completely right, and when it comes down to it, we think that the right amount of stress can actually be

a motivating tool for good in our lives. Um. You know, like we feel that life is always throwing us curveballs, but being in a tough financial spot that can actually make life even more stressful. And we want money to be a source of less stress in your life. So instead of taking you know, the stress relief routes that most Americans take, which, like we said, you know, it only leads to worse outcomes and and even more stress.

We would rather see folks set more realistic expectations h and to start working towards solutions that will will impact your mental health and your finances in a positive way. We don't want you to completely ignore stress in your life, but we want you instead to listen to it. We wanted to inform the decisions you make so that you're working towards your goals. No doubt, Matt, stress can have a good side, it turns out, and hopefully we can use that stress as a motivator and not as yeah,

something that defeats us. Um. But let's move back to the beer that we had on this episode. This one was called Mouhito by Bolero Snort Brewery. He told Logger with lime, juice and mint, what was your take on it? Uh? Beach. Like. That's what I thought of as I was rinking this beer. And I think the reason it reminds me of the beach not just because of the mohito, but because it tastes a lot like bud Light lime. And the only time I think I've ever had that beer is actually

on the beach. Uh. I know, back in the day, you're the only place it's okay to Yeah, so, uh, you know, this was a different beer, a different take on this style of lager. And here's the thing, I'm not gonna hate on any specific type of style of beer, because I think there's virtually a time and place for any type of beer out there. It was fun to enjoy this one today. You know, temperatures are definitely warmer

around uh here in Atlanta. I thought this one was good, but I think I would have enjoyed it even more if I was sitting there with my toes in the sand. Yeah, everything tastes better with your toes in the sand. I think that's what Corona at least is banking on with their and the way they do their commercials. But yeah, I thought this this beer was had a refreshing factor for sure, right because like mint and lime, those those

two ingredients just to me, they dream refreshing. But it was light and it did taste a little bit like a beer moheat um. Like I think they got what they were going for. But yeah, for me, this wasn't my jam um in a big way. I would say I probably wouldn't pick this up again at the bottle shop, but uh, it was. I agree. If if I was on the beach, I'd feel differently about it. I'd probably be down with this. It's just not a beer that I want to drink within the four walls of my

home or our podcasting studio totally. Well, that's the thing.

Like there's beers like we we've taken really good beers to the beach before, like when we go to the beach with our families, and we've had really good beers on the beach before, and I'll tell you what, I did not enjoy them nearly as much out there in the sun, sweating, you know, with the ocean, you know, out before you it's like too much and so yeah, yeah, yeah, there's there's almost too much flavor and so the time in the place that you enjoy a beer that has

everything to do with the ultimate satisfaction of the beverage. But even still, man, I'm glad that you and I got to share this one on the show today, and that's gonna be it for this episode. Listeners will be able to find our show notes up on our website at how some money dot com. That's right, So until next time, best friends Out, Best Friends Out,